(#42) Embracing New Beginnings: Learning Something New With Ease
May 15, 2024Episode 42
Rae The Somatic Coach
On today's episode of The Raediant Life Podcast, your host Rae shares about how to start something new with ease. We've all been a beginner (and might still be) and that's okay! Tune in to receive:
An understanding of learning curve consciousness and how this can have a positive impact on our mindset
How to recognize the valley of despair/bridge of hope when you're starting something new
What to do and how to embrace imperfection
Reduce self-criticism with this fun game I like to play
Learn to overcome fear and self-doubt when entering into new phases of life
Participate in Curious Convos. Share your questions and topic requests!
Disclaimer: Please remember that the information shared on this podcast is intended to inspire, educate, and support you on your personal journey. It does not substitute for professional mental health advice. I am not a psychologist or medical professional. If you are experiencing any emotional distress, mental health challenges, or medical conditions, please seek help from a qualified professional.
On today's episode of The Raediant Life Podcast, your host Rae shares about how to start something new with ease. We've all been a beginner (and might still be) and that's okay! Tune in to receive:
An understanding of learning curve consciousness and how this can have a positive impact on our mindset
How to recognize the valley of despair/bridge of hope when you're starting something new
What to do and how to embrace imperfection
Reduce self-criticism with this fun game I like to play
Learn to overcome fear and self-doubt when entering into new phases of life
Participate in Curious Convos. Share your questions and topic requests!
Disclaimer: Please remember that the information shared on this podcast is intended to inspire, educate, and support you on your personal journey. It does not substitute for professional mental health advice. I am not a psychologist or medical professional. If you are experiencing any emotional distress, mental health challenges, or medical conditions, please seek help from a qualified professional.
Speaker 1:
Welcome to the Radiant Life Podcast. I'm your host, rae, the Somatic Coach, and I'm here to support you in healing your past, living in the present and creating your future so that you can become the most centered, embodied and happiest version of yourself. Each week, I'll be bringing you episodes to help you navigate life's challenges, ease stress and tension and learn more about holistic healing, spirituality and wellness. If you're interested in becoming the best version of yourself so that you can live the life of your dreams, then you're in the right place. Subscribe to the podcast and the monthly newsletter and follow me on Instagram and TikTok to know when new episodes are released each week. I am so happy that you've landed here. Let's dive in. Welcome back to the podcast. If you are new here, I'm Rae, I'm a somatic coach and breathwork facilitator, and if you aren't new here, welcome back. I'm so glad that you're tuning in for today's episode.
Speaker 1:
For today's topic, I wanted to talk about how, when we start something new, it can be really hard for us. It can be really confronting for us, and so how we can learn something new and start something new with ease. How we can be more gentle with ourselves, how we can be more self-compassionate, and so this could look like maybe you're transitioning to a new job, maybe you're in a new relationship, maybe you're looking to start your own business anything where you might be doing something new that you've never done before and what can we do when that happens to make ourselves feel okay in learning something new? That can be really confronting for us. So that's what today's episode is all about. If you are starting something new, there are definitely a lot of challenges that you might encounter, so you might feel fearful of the uncertainty and the unknown of starting this new project and not knowing where it's going to go. You might feel like you don't have like the skill set or the knowledge yet as much as you would like to, because it's new. You might feel like there's some self-doubt that's present some perfectionism. You might also feel a little bit isolated or lonely if it's a new job and you still haven't made connections, or you're starting your own business and nobody in your family or none of your friends have had their own business before. Or maybe you're in a new relationship and you want things to go really well, so you might feel a little bit isolated because maybe you're not talking to your friends about it as much because it's new. So those are definitely some challenges that you might encounter, and we're going to chat a little bit about how we can move through all of these challenges with a little bit more ease and awareness.
Speaker 1:
So one thing I always like to point out when I'm working with a client who is coming to me and might be experiencing some of these kind of growing pains, is what I like to say is the idea of learning curve consciousness. So this is the idea that as more time goes on, the more competent we become. So if you even google it, you'll see there are images for it. I can link one in the show notes as well, and it will. It really highlights the different stages that you move through as you're learning, and I think this gets overlooked because we want to just be further along sometimes than we can be, which understandably so, but what that does is it kind of can exasperate some anxiety rather than just like being exactly where we are.
Speaker 1:
So the first stage of learning curve consciousness is unconscious incompetence. So this is when we don't know how to do something. We're not really aware of if we're like good or bad at it, but we're new, right, we just started, so we're not even conscious of what we're good at or what we're not great at. And then we move on to stage two, which is conscious incompetence. So now enough time has passed where we know a little bit about the skills, we've gained a little bit of experience that we've improved in some way, but we know that maybe in another area we're not quite there yet. And then we have conscious competence. So this is where we've gotten all the skills, like enough time has passed that we're performing well. We may have, you know, passed some sort of like exam even, or taken a certification or something, and we're kind of on the other side of the I don't know part. We're not completely there, but we have more conscious awareness and more confidence in the area that we're working with.
Speaker 1:
And then the fourth stage is unconscious competence. So this is kind of like you've been enough time has passed, you've been working on this task or in this role long enough that you can do it in your sleep, so to speak, like you're in a flow state. That doesn't mean that everything is perfect by any means. I don't think in any of these stages we're not striving for perfection, but it's just like riding a bike you learned how to ride a bike and now you can do it without even thinking about it because it's unconscious competence. So just naming these four stages learning curve, consciousness it's definitely helpful to name them and just kind of know, okay, like right now I'm in stage two, like I've been at my job for a few weeks, but I know in six months I'll be at stage three, like whatever it might look like for you, but I think it's helpful to name it.
Speaker 1:
And then another image that I'd love to share with you and I'll also link this one in the show notes is called the Valley of Despair, and in this article someone has transformed that terminology into the Bridge of Hope, which I like. It's more of like a positive mindset, like growth mindset name. So we're going to run with that. It's called the bridge of hope and in this image it shows that when you're moving through a transition or a change, you might move through some fears, some guilt. You might end up in what's called the valley of despair, which is like oh wow, this is a lot harder than I thought it would be. And then when you move over that phase, you move into gradual acceptance. You move into like a moving forward mindset, acceptance, optimism and growth. And so this image of that journey, of how it's not necessarily like linear, it's not just like you started and then you felt great. You know like sometimes we have to go through this phase of what's called the bridge of hope, so I'll also link this one in the show notes I think it's really helpful to name knowing that when we're starting something new, sometimes it's just not going to be easy. We might run into some challenges, and that that's okay.
Speaker 1:
And then the third thing that I will mention, when it comes to learning or starting something new, feeling more at ease is allowing ourselves to be imperfect. So perfectionism and feeling like we need to have all the answers will definitely make something less enjoyable and will also stop us, you know, dead in our tracks because we don't necessarily have all the answers yet. And if we're trying really hard to know all of the things and we don't, it can not feel so great. So what's been really helpful for perfectionism for myself and also for my clients, is inner child healing. Inner child healing is this concept of working with a part of yourself that's anywhere from zero to 14 years old and this part of yourself had a lived experience and now, as your adult self, it can come through and be running the show. So there's this underlying need for either safety, love, belonging, acceptance, whatever it might be, and then that need ends up running the show. So this is something for me that I really had to take head on when I started my business because I was new, right.
Speaker 1:
Sometimes I still feel new and I'm in like year two or three or whatever year it is so really allowing yourself to take messy action, to take risks, and doing it from a place that feels really safe. Because when you connect with that inner child that feels the struggles of perfectionism and having things needing to look sound or be a certain way before they take action, needing to look sound or be a certain way before they take action, that can feel really scary. I know for myself, my perfectionism was from being a competitive athlete, so I received a lot of recognition and a lot of love from how I performed. But if I'm not performing and I'm not receiving love, then there's this part of me that felt really scared and like what's going on, right? So I did a lot of inner work to discover that and it's definitely created a lot of transformation in my personal life, and I see it in my clients lives too. Like I definitely work with people that are building their own businesses, that are starting new jobs, new relationships, and perfectionism gets in the way of fun, right?
Speaker 1:
So when we're learning something new, allow yourself to be imperfect, allow yourself to take messy action, connect with your inner child and be more self-compassionate with yourself. And then the fourth thing that I'll mention for learning something new with ease is if you're being really hard on yourself, like you are, like I should be further along than I am I should be, you know. Like I should be further along than I am I should be, you know I should know this already. Like I should have it all figured out by now. Make it a game, like play this game with me, even if it's just for one week. For one week, just make it a game and say that, wherever you're at like, whatever progress you've made, how, whatever you're being hard on yourself for for one week, say that it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1:
Whatever this thing is that you're hard on yourself for, be like for this one week, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter that I'm, you know, not as far along in my job as I'd like to be, or it doesn't matter that I didn't get as many views on the reel that I wanted, like whatever. The thing is that you are being really, really hard on yourself for for one week. Play this game with me and say I'm going to let go for one week of this thing that I'm really being hard on myself for and let it be fun, let it make it a game, let it be entertaining for yourself and notice the shifts after that one week, if you can really do it. Notice what letting go of that thing did for you.
Speaker 1:
And then the last thing that I will share with you, when it comes to learning something new, feeling more at ease, feeling more embodied, is that when we stop growing, it's because we've stopped learning. When we stop growing, it's because we've stopped learning. So it doesn't matter if it is day one and you've started something completely brand new, or if you are on year 10 and you're striving for something more. If we've stopped growing and we've stopped moving through these learning curve, consciousness, the valley of despair, the bridge of hope, allowing ourselves to be imperfect, inner child, healing and playing the game of that, whatever that thing we're harping on ourself doesn't matter for one week, all of those growing pains, it's because we've stopped learning, we've stopped growing right.
Speaker 1:
So, knowing that, in whatever area it is that you are looking to make strides in, it's because you're growing, it's because you're learning Like you are taking the initiative of trying something new. And when we try something new, sometimes we're not the best at it in the beginning, but over time we become confident in it, we become efficient in it, and then we start striving for something else. Right, we start wanting maybe it's still in the same field or the same area or the same job but then maybe we start striving for a promotion and then from there, maybe we feel like we want more, from there. You know, whatever it might look like, if you are learning something new and you're being really hard on yourself, come back to this episode. Move through all of these steps. Look at learning curve, consciousness, look at the bridge of hope, allow yourself to take messy action, allow yourself to be imperfect, connect with your inner child and play the game All right. So that is what I have for you for today's episode.
Speaker 1:
I enjoyed making this one, had some fire in this one, had some fun, so I hope that you enjoyed it as well. Let me know if you have any questions, send me a DM, send me an email. I love hearing from you and, yeah, I hope that you have an incredible rest of your week. I hope that you have an incredible rest of your day and I will talk to you soon. An incredible rest of your day and I will talk to you soon.
Speaker 1:
Thank you so much for tuning in to today's episode. If you are moved or inspired, please share with me by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. It means the world to me and I am so appreciative for your support in helping my podcast grow. If we aren't already connected on social media, head over to Instagram and TikTok and follow me at Raythesemanticcoach. Make sure you check out the show notes of today's episode for links to freebies, opportunities to work with me and ways we can stay connected outside of the podcast. I'm so happy that you're here and I can't wait to talk with you on our next episode of the Radiant Life podcast.
