What if I told you there's a superwoman amidst us, juggling roles, overcoming fears, and carving a path of resilience and strength? Meet Ashley, a former single mother who valiantly shared her journey, the highs and lows of single parenthood, and her battle with financial fear.
Alongside Ashley, we have host and single mom Mel. We delve into the heart of our struggles - attempting to comfort our children while dealing with personal battles, finding balance between work, parenting, and self-care with scarce resources. Hear about our real-life stories, the grit and tenacity we summon daily.
We want to remind all single parents listening- you're doing an outstanding job! We hope our shared experiences offer comfort and encouragement to listeners navigating similar paths. So, join us as we celebrate this rollercoaster journey of single parenthood with all its trials, triumphs and the indomitable spirit it requires.
Social Media: LPoP
https://www.instagram.com/lastpieceofpiepodcast/
https://www.threads.net/@lastpieceofpiepodcast
https://www.tiktok.com/@last.piece.of.pie?_t=8j0uDxkYoVm&_r=1
Send us your comments or questions and we will answer them on the show!
email - lastpieceofpiepodcast@gmail.com
What if I told you there's a superwoman amidst us, juggling roles, overcoming fears, and carving a path of resilience and strength? Meet Ashley, a former single mother who valiantly shared her journey, the highs and lows of single parenthood, and her battle with financial fear.
Alongside Ashley, we have host and single mom Mel. We delve into the heart of our struggles - attempting to comfort our children while dealing with personal battles, finding balance between work, parenting, and self-care with scarce resources. Hear about our real-life stories, the grit and tenacity we summon daily.
We want to remind all single parents listening- you're doing an outstanding job! We hope our shared experiences offer comfort and encouragement to listeners navigating similar paths. So, join us as we celebrate this rollercoaster journey of single parenthood with all its trials, triumphs and the indomitable spirit it requires.
Social Media: LPoP
https://www.instagram.com/lastpieceofpiepodcast/
https://www.threads.net/@lastpieceofpiepodcast
https://www.tiktok.com/@last.piece.of.pie?_t=8j0uDxkYoVm&_r=1
Send us your comments or questions and we will answer them on the show!
email - lastpieceofpiepodcast@gmail.com
I would love to be Abby. I mean, I get up, I cook her breakfast, I make your lunch.
Speaker 2:I used to. You just said you haven't been cooking, so we know that's a lie. Welcome L-Poppers. This is Last Piece of Pie. I'm Jen, I'm Mel and today we have a special guest, ashley. Hey, ashley, we're so excited for you to be here. Today's episode is going to be about single mom, single parents Woo-woo. Are you sure you want to woo-woo about single?
Speaker 1:parents Hell yeah, I'm on the homestretch, I've got. Well, we both have like six months left and they're going to college. We can like high five each other and say we did it.
Speaker 2:How old were your kids when you became a single parent?
Speaker 3:My daughter was two. She had just turned two when I got a divorce.
Speaker 2:So you had a toddler? Yes, yep. So what was your biggest fear when you first became a single mom?
Speaker 3:Honestly.
Speaker 2:Yes, money.
Speaker 3:OK, yeah, yeah, because that was I was not the breadwinner. My, her father was in the military and so he was completely the breadwinner and I just stayed home and I worked at a daycare maybe two days a week, so I was making nothing and that was definitely my number one fear.
Speaker 2:That seems to be a theme.
Speaker 3:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:I feel like now you had the same fear. It still is the same, is it not?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I don't think it goes away. It never goes away.
Speaker 1:We talk about it all the time the credit card debt, the $200 bills every single hour, it's like mommy, 200. Yep.
Speaker 2:OK, mel, did you have? You didn't have support from your ex.
Speaker 1:In the beginning, no, like years, no. But then finally, like, say, michigan started giving me some money. I don't know how or why, but like little bits. Like this month I got like $200.
Speaker 2:I was like woohoo, oh nice, I can feed her, even though she's 18, they still gave you Well she's 18, but still in high school.
Speaker 1:Oh, ok, so she still has another year, but I think it really quit. I think it's just given because he's backlogged.
Speaker 2:OK, yeah, ashley, did you have support at young age for kids?
Speaker 3:Yes, I did Yep, it pretty much started immediately. I mean, it did start immediately, especially since I had pretty much zero income. The divorce lawyer pretty much was like OK, you need support to survive, right. So yes, but it's definitely not something that you can rely on, fuck.
Speaker 2:No, it's something that just comes and goes and it's a little surprise, I guess it's nice to get, and I feel like you can't do anything about it because our system's so broken.
Speaker 1:Oh, girl, and they know how to work it, yeah.
Speaker 2:People who don't, I guess aren't in that situation. I feel like don't understand how much it takes to get it on a regular basis.
Speaker 3:I will say, the thing that is very frustrating to me and I was thinking about this today is that when I actually got a job and started making a living for myself and my daughter, it government or the state or whoever noticed and we did a what's that called, were they?
Speaker 2:Like, were they?
Speaker 3:recalculating. They recalculated and I got less, which made me so frustrated, because that doesn't mean that my daughter he must have had requested that, though, because they they don't.
Speaker 1:they're unaware of that, so he must have requested that you must have gotten a job, and he must have notified the court that you got a new job.
Speaker 3:Right but, and that's fine, but it just is frustrating when it was still a little bit of money, and shitty Right. So it's not a fine and it gets less and it's like she still costs the same amount of money to the court and it's not like she's less than.
Speaker 2:Just because you're making more money doesn't mean that she needs less.
Speaker 3:Right, right, correct that makes sense and doesn't sound to.
Speaker 2:I know I feel like the system is against single moms as far as financial support.
Speaker 1:I wouldn't say single moms, I'd say single parents. Because if the roles were reversed and I was the breadwinner as a woman and I had to pay the man, I can still break the same fucking system. That's true. I can still pay five bucks to not go to jail.
Speaker 2:I just that just baffles my mind that you can just pay like oh, I paid five bucks this month, I'm good, but you're still behind like thousands of dollars and they do nothing. 10,000, 15.
Speaker 1:10,000. Yeah, that's awful.
Speaker 2:Good lord, can somebody please?
Speaker 1:like.
Speaker 3:Change the laws Change these laws.
Speaker 2:Ok, so financial A, probably the biggest fear, what was, I guess, like your biggest like aha moment? Like I can do this, I'm going to be fine.
Speaker 3:I think when we got our first apartment on our own because when we first moved back into Michigan because we were out of state, so when we first moved back into Michigan I had to live with my grandma and it was the most humbling experience because I'm a very prideful person and that destroyed me to know that I needed help like that. And when I was able to, I got a waitressing job and we survived. And then when I got my big kid job, I was able to get my own apartment and that it was like 500 bucks a month. It was a small one bedroom apartment. I slept on a couch, but to have our own space and to have mine and hers to have it ours was where I was like, ok, we can do this. We got this.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's so amazing. Well, thank God for grandmas and parents who do support you after divorce or after a life event like that. I mean right, you need a support group.
Speaker 1:Absolutely so. That's when I knew Ash, that's when we first became friends and I would have never known that was your humbling days. Like you pulled that shit off Like you look confident. Yes.
Speaker 2:Abby's favorite place was Grandma's house.
Speaker 3:Yeah, Do you remember? It still is everybody.
Speaker 2:I mean whose grandma's house is not the favorite place.
Speaker 1:But Ash would be cooking there and you'd only cook like mashed potatoes or something. Do you remember?
Speaker 2:Living out of mac and cheese and mashed potatoes. We had a lot of lasagna. Like the stover's a lot. Lasagna, no real lasagna.
Speaker 3:It was cheaper actually to make it like from scratch.
Speaker 1:Oh dang, Look at you go. Yeah, she's a badass. Please humble my ass I was like I saw you pulling up.
Speaker 2:What about you, mel? I think you might have said it, but is there a aha moment? I know you like. You and Abby lived off like $18,000 the first year, but was there like a specific moment that you're like.
Speaker 1:I feel like maybe my moment is happening this year. It's the end of the last hurrah and it's been really bad.
Speaker 3:Going up.
Speaker 1:There's been a lot of fucking stakes, teenage drama. No, but like a lot of, like the basement just issues Like I'm like I can't catch a break, like this is the most expensive year for a kid, like there's thousands of dollars going out every single fucking month and I'm like I can't keep up and then the house is falling apart and I'm like I feel like this is my home stretch and I'm like this is the hardest year. If I can, just nine more months.
Speaker 2:Because Abby's a senior, she is Going off to college.
Speaker 1:And so is Amelia, her baby.
Speaker 2:Your baby is now also a senior. Yes, well, we almost made it High five. Yes, I'm so proud of you too. I'm like do you want?
Speaker 1:to share a tent. Do you want to share cookies? I'll go first and you can have all of my leftover food.
Speaker 2:So what's one of your like, funniest moments that you can remember as a single mom? As your kids were growing up, like I said, when they were a teenager, did they have a moment where they realized, like, all the hard work you've done as a mom, or is that still yet to come?
Speaker 1:Do our children appreciate us? Is what you're asking, right?
Speaker 3:now as 17 and 18 year olds. No.
Speaker 1:No, ok, wait, listen, we have to have a whole episode on raising teenagers. I feel like so yesterday I went and bought Ab and I new phones and so I went and got like the case and screen protector, paid for it all and then the next day she was to go and set up her own contract. She's 18 now.
Speaker 1:So I'm just like trying to empower her to do this stuff by herself. I set up the guy. I was like, listen, she's coming, I want to be here, but I shouldn't be here, so you're going to have to walk her through. He's like I got you, I set up an appointment. He had her that little shit upgraded, the fucking phone.
Speaker 2:You should have gave him instructions that she could not do anything else.
Speaker 1:When you have mom's credit card.
Speaker 2:Oh my goodness, that is hilarious, is that not so Ab? So being a single mom is Unappreciated job.
Speaker 1:And I think one day, when they're grown, they'll look back and go Wow, that that must have been a lot. It must have been a lot to be mom and dad At the same time.
Speaker 3:I think, I think honestly, it's more, it's not more, but I think being it's unappreciated, being a working single mom.
Speaker 3:Okay because to work nine to five, to come home and to be the only parent that can go and get a red t-shirt from school or for school if they need it from target. So we got to load everyone up at eight o'clock at night. That kind of stuff like that is Very difficult and people don't see that Ever because you can't show it as a single mom, right, because you're literally the only one doing it. Yeah, or single parent I should say you're the only one doing it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so my question would be how did you balance it?
Speaker 3:You don't, you just survive, you just survive. So what do you have?
Speaker 2:so did you have any Family or friends that would be, like all can pick her up or no? We just had to figure it out.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I had, if I had. I had a pretty phenomenal Support system my mom and my grandma really, because I worked half an hour away from her school and she danced competitively support group about your friends, my friends. Miss Melanie over here. Good gosh, melanie would. I would stubbornly and pridefully be like no, I can make it up there in a half an hour and we can get her to the school. And Melanie would be like or I can just pick Up right now and I'll have her there 20 minutes early and she'll be there already.
Speaker 3:And then you can show up when you can get there, like and we got ice cream right and she loved it.
Speaker 1:When Mama Rockman picked up, oh my gosh um, what would you say like describe mother goat?
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, I was gonna ask mother guilt, or just maybe Ego, that you don't want to ask for help. Mm-hmm pride pride or, I guess, to go with mom guilt first.
Speaker 1:I will. There's there's a lot of single guilt as a mom. That's it's. It's a different. So I was a stay-at-home mom for what? First? 13, 15 years, right, mm-hmm. So then to transfer that into single motherhood was it's weird. It's like I live two different lives. You did, I did 100% and you went from Be in stay-at-home mom to having to work full-time Mm-hmm but it's like it was weird because, looking back now, like when I was 13, like the birthdays were extravagant, mm-hmm, oh my gosh her birthdays were so extravagant.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I was just trying to always like, just make up, mm-hmm. I Think that's what my mom guilt has led me to just making up making up in holidays, private schools, mm-hmm, can we talk about that, Mm-hmm right, so just always trying to make up for the loss of a dad.
Speaker 3:I Don't see, I I didn't go from a like supportive happy Marriage.
Speaker 2:I know yours wasn't supportive and happy, but from the outside, yeah, it looked like that. It did look great. It was great.
Speaker 3:Very good, hyder looked fantastic, but because I, so her dad was in the military and he was overseas for the first, for from her first birthday to her second birthday, and then we got divorced after her second birthday, so I feel like I just did it by myself from day one.
Speaker 3:So it was like I never knew. I don't know, I don't. I don't want this to sound horrible, but I don't feel like I have mom guilt. I don't think I ever have ever. No, I don't, because I think I just look at it Like this is how it is, this is how it's got to be.
Speaker 2:Mm-hmm.
Speaker 3:This is how it's got to be done in order for us to survive. It's. I'm always on survival mode, always, and so I think Amelia is too, and so I think that gets rid of mom guilt. I don't time for mom Go do you feel like?
Speaker 2:Do you feel exhausted?
Speaker 3:Oh.
Speaker 1:The fucking time but the fact that you don't have mom guilt is an is a mate is amazing.
Speaker 3:I don't know if that's good, I don't know either it's nuts, it could be.
Speaker 2:You're just in survival mode.
Speaker 3:You don't have time for any other emotions, truly don't, I don't, and I don't, and I don't have Very good compassion.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, she has a black heart like me.
Speaker 1:No, yes, I'm taking over. Okay, so actually does have mom guilt. She just can't feel it. Yeah, because we talk often about how I actually is much tougher than I am.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:I like feel guilty all the time. I'm like, oh my gosh, I wish she had a better dad, I wish she had a better relationship with her dad, and you're like no no, moved on.
Speaker 3:I don't, I don't have time to deal with that, I don't I. You know, time to time to deal with it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, that's not your, but I still like feel bad about it. You can feel bad but at the same time, like I don't think Abby feels bad about it at all, no, she moved on.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she moved on at 13.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So what advice would you give a Friend that becomes a new single mom? Like what's your number one advice?
Speaker 1:Don't be afraid, mm-hmm. You gotta squash that fear, and one day at a time. No, I would even do like one minute at a time. Do you remember? I'd be like one hour, like let's just get through 12 to 1, there was.
Speaker 3:Yeah, definitely and just Just. It can be done and it will be done because you're gonna make it happen. There's, there's, no. That's. The one thing that I've learned is that, like I said, there's, this is my job. No one else is gonna do it for me. So I'm going to do it and I'm going to do a good job, because you have a baby relying on you and You're it's almost like your motherly instincts or your parenting or father. It will just kick in and it will get done. You will do it, okay, even if, even if you're a single dad, I feel like the struggles are the same, right.
Speaker 2:You can have dad guilt, you could have financial stress, because I feel like men are much more. I need to be provider, right, if it's, the rules are reversed and they're the sole parent taking care of their kid.
Speaker 1:So you, though, were a badass in Goman, though Okay, you keep saying that I know, but you are not Okay, so listen y'all. I was like married but miserable. You were happily married.
Speaker 3:And miserable, and no one knew it.
Speaker 1:And so Ashley would show up and be like in her cute little like teal car Right, and her kid would always be sleeping. And I'd be like, does she ever nap, the kid? And you're like, yeah, no, we don't have time. We have dance, we have gymnastics, we have to go to work. And she was just like here, we go On to the next. And you're like, hey, I'm gonna be on vacation next week. Can you take her Like you were?
Speaker 3:misconfident in my eyes and one time this is a funny story that she yes, we were on the go 24, seven. And one time I picked her up from school and we had to go to some an appointment or something, and I didn't and she did not feel good and I was like I don't have time for this. Like get in the car, we're gonna go. You can like sleep in the back seat or something while we're at this appointment. And we're on the way to the appointment and I had like a Tupperware food container in the back seat. That girl picked it up and puked in it.
Speaker 2:Oh I was like, well, hey, good for her for like that, just puking out over the car. And I was like, honey, just put the top on it.
Speaker 3:we gotta make this appointment. No, you did that, and then I threw it away when we got home, but I was like I'm so proud of you.
Speaker 1:that was so good, see, she's so empowering. I would have been like oh my god, we suck, there's no parents, we're throwing up in Tupperware. She's like hi five, bitch, you got that, you made it all almost in there.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh my god. Any other parent would be like what the fuck she's like. I'm so proud of you for puking into Tupperware.
Speaker 3:You're gonna do well in college, by the way, the fact that she like felt it coming and then she grabbed the Tupperware, I was, like I'm so proud of you honey.
Speaker 2:Well, how old was she?
Speaker 3:at the time, oh, like five. Oh my gosh, she was young Teaching her how to be self-reliant five. Like he's at Thrive at State. She's gonna be great.
Speaker 2:So I know both of your kids are gonna be off to college, so Mel's gonna be an empty nester.
Speaker 1:I gotta steal some babies. Fuck my life, I'm still a baby.
Speaker 2:I was gonna ask you what are you looking most forward to? You're gonna be an empty nester and bitch. You better say hang in out with me more.
Speaker 1:Yes, I'm gonna be a tailgating mom, aka drunk mom.
Speaker 2:I forgot. We're gonna be tailgating guys.
Speaker 1:Jen's gonna be puking in the bushes off to Keela. You're gonna be rolling in with your two boys that are going crazy and you're gonna have them on headlocks and they're gonna be like hockey, fighting hockey sticks, and it's gonna be the best family affair ever.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, ashley has also two young boys. I do.
Speaker 3:And engaged, not recently engaged, jess, we got engaged about three years ago but just keep having babies.
Speaker 1:AKA them and married for like ten years.
Speaker 3:We've been together for about ten years.
Speaker 2:She smells dream. One of her babies is going off to college, but she has two lefts.
Speaker 1:Right girl, right A hot man at home.
Speaker 3:Hey, greg J. Come on give him a shout out.
Speaker 1:He's so embarrassed he is one of my favorite humans, oh, I love that.
Speaker 2:He's a blessing, that's for sure, oh, I love second time around positive marriages.
Speaker 2:My younger sister is also a single mom. I would have had her on the podcast, but she lives in Indiana and she's also a great guy, married to Steve. Oh, scoop of Steve Hi, he listens to the podcast, woo. So, ladies, I really appreciate you telling your story. It's been amazing. You're both are super moms. And I guess my last question is Were there any resources that you didn't know about that you wish you would have known when you were a single mom or earlier on? Was there something that you were like man? I wish I had this resource.
Speaker 1:I think, just more than a resource, just more of like being humble and asking for help. I didn't, I've never asked for help. Do you realize that about me?
Speaker 3:Yes, are you laughing at me? No, me either, no.
Speaker 1:So pride, no, you did. You would at least let me let your baby watch your baby's while you went on vacation.
Speaker 3:I was like the only one, okay, but that like yeah, but but that was still even hard for you. You forced me to. Hell yeah, I did, I'm not mad that I let someone else watch her. Hell yeah, I'm like give me your kid. You're like what are you doing? I?
Speaker 1:stepped mom rights bitch.
Speaker 3:And they're still the best of friends. They are. No, I don't know, resources-wise, I I honestly which is sad I don't, I have no idea, I don't either. It's yeah, I couldn't even tell you. So I would say since I don't know.
Speaker 1:I would say just asking, being more vulnerable and ask for more help, because even though the people in my life didn't step up and say, hey, I'll do this, doesn't mean they wouldn't.
Speaker 1:It just means, they don't have the tools to say, hey, I'm here. So sometimes, if we pick up the tools and say, listen, I need some yard work done, I need help, and so I'll call my dad and be like dad. I fought with this weedbacker all season long. I'm done. I need you to show up at the end of the year and weedback for the first time this summer. And dad will show up and he'll weed back and be like no problem honey.
Speaker 2:So I feel like sometimes people want to help but they don't know how.
Speaker 1:They don't, yeah, they don't know what you need. We're all private people, right? We're all like nestled in and private, like my dad doesn't know what I need. But if I was to call my dad and say, dad, I'm a hundred bucks short this month, there'd be a hundred dollars on my porch tomorrow morning, yeah, yeah. If I say, hey, dad, my lawnmower broke and the grass is seven feet tall, I'm embarrassed, can you help? He'd be here. We'd whack him himself.
Speaker 2:Do you think it's like a fear of judgment sometimes when you ask for help? I think that's not, maybe not apparent.
Speaker 1:It's more survival. You're just to the next and you're just trying to get through. You know what?
Speaker 2:I mean Survival mode, because you don't have any tunnel vision. There's no other option.
Speaker 1:What's important is, your mortgage is paid and food's on the table and homework's done.
Speaker 2:Fuck the lawn.
Speaker 3:Food clothing shelter, yeah, and it makes it sound bad. It's not all bad. I loved being a single mom. I mean I love obviously my life now Right, but we had so much fun. The traveling we. I mean that girl and I. She was my girl, I mean she's still my girl, but like it, we and yes, we went on trips. I made sure we went on trip, even if it was just to Florida.
Speaker 2:You know, find girl, you took her ass to Paris. I did, yeah, wow, that's amazing.
Speaker 3:She was a super snarky mom. I did, I did. Well, it was to visit my brother, but yeah, I did.
Speaker 2:Still, I mean, if that's not a story for anybody that listens to this that is going through a divorce or is about to be a single mom. Like, listen to these ladies.
Speaker 1:They did it and she didn't want.
Speaker 3:She did it very well.
Speaker 2:I feel like I get you so yeah, if you hustle you got a little.
Speaker 3:Yeah, cuz like I said, like you know, we said before, there's no one else that's gonna do it for you, right, and you got a little baby and even like on a simpler scale, like what was every night show.
Speaker 1:Gilmore girls that show we would eat Chinese food every weekend, pizza and we just binge watch Gilmore girls. And ab was like I'll never forget her looking at me. Be like mom, that's oh yeah, like that is us.
Speaker 3:So there was a lot of like just special tokens that just made your heart just like it's like what the stress yeah you get the nuggets of yeah, love I think yeah, I definitely think a million are much closer because of, yeah, our life, our life together, for sure I see that.
Speaker 2:I see that in my Sister in my knees, hundred percent cuz she was a single mom pretty much the first ten years of your life and that kid is freaking amazing. Yeah, justice, I know you listen to hey girl, hey hd. By the time she's like twenty five.
Speaker 3:I also think that children of single parents are resilient. Resilient, I mean independent amelia at this, I mean, I think from the stage of 10 she didn't need me, but like I mean I know abby's I mean of course all teenagers are we don't see them, but yeah, it's just the level of independence and the level of resilience and the level of Again confidence. I can do this, I got this, don't worry about it.
Speaker 1:And if you think about it, they've seen us right fake it. That's what I'm saying. Even though we were faking it right, we did make it on a pine everything up top is fine.
Speaker 2:Everything below water, water, water Pat on like a mother.
Speaker 1:Oh my lord but you know I love about the whole season of it's almost done, like that just brings a smile to my face, like I cannot wait to high five graduation and go like we did it and then be like what's next? I have no idea it's a and they're two different, totally like we need you're gonna get remarried. Great jay for the win a honey, what's? I got a lot.
Speaker 2:Matt mellon, I are gonna be golden girls up in the bitch, so any other. You know empty nest. Mom wants to join us come on over. Right was have a village of a single ladies in our sixties, all of our kids could come over take over easy with your sixties. Hopefully we will not be single by the time we're sixty or sixty won't be. Yeah, he did. I brought you one today.
Speaker 1:Oh, chocolate man in a coffee cup. It's a great birthday gift help poppers.
Speaker 2:I gave mell birthday slash christmas gift. It's the perfect man I'm gonna find a matte. Walmart Hashtag Walmart. Please contact All right ladies. This has been amazing episode. Any last thoughts before we wrap it up?
Speaker 1:If you're feeling overwhelmed guilty, I would say have a glass of wine, read a book, take a deep breath and know in the morning you'll wake up with all the tools that you need. Beautiful.
Speaker 3:I would say you're so kind. I would say run with your pride. I would say let your pride Be, yes, motivate you, let it make you tough, let it make you stronger, because you will be in the end. I was often called by therapist and ice queen, and I was totally okay with that because I was like you know what. That's fine. My bills are paid, my daughter's happy, so let's move on please. Yes, you have to have them in talent in my mind, but there's also other sides, like miss melanie and sweet and calm I am not that so.
Speaker 2:So I would guess there's not a much, there's not a lot of time for self care as a single mom.
Speaker 3:So I had a different than you know, because you were 100% all the time. I had my weekends, okay, so when she would go to her dad's for the weekends every other weekend, that was because I was a young single mom.
Speaker 1:I was 23 and she was for yeah because I had a nice 21.
Speaker 3:So, no, I'm sorry. Yeah, anyways, I was 23 when I got divorced and people were like you missed out on your 20s and I did not, because I had my mom like me being a mom, and then she'd go to her dad's and I would do my self care. I'd, you know, go get a pedicure. I'd go out with my girlfriends nice if I had the extra funds yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So there is opportunities absolutely to do self care, especially if you have somebody that a parent.
Speaker 1:That's a parent for me I was gonna say I'm running on empty, as I know not every single parent out there has the partner that they can rely on. Yeah, so no, I'm going in with broken hips, but I am gonna be wheelchair and wheeling it high five and you're gonna be like I did it my body doesn't work anymore, but we did it that's.
Speaker 2:That's awesome. I think those are great tips. Be confident, know that fear is just fear there's a liar fears, like we've said that so many times. Yeah, you can do it you can do it.
Speaker 1:if we can, you can, and we have two very different stories and very different, just theories on single parent and life yeah, yeah, and whether you have a partner that helped and they were not.
Speaker 2:Still it's.
Speaker 3:It's not an easy road for either Very emotional, but it's very rewarding.
Speaker 1:Is it so rewarding those little when?
Speaker 3:they when they succeed and you watch them and you're like I did that yeah.
Speaker 1:I was gonna graduate in May with three point seven. Yeah, that's what? Math tutoring two hundred fifty dollars.
Speaker 2:Well, tell poppers, if you're a single mom or a single dad out there, we love you. You're doing great. Don't let anybody else tell you anything different. We got you.
Speaker 1:Proud of you. Keep doing what you're doing. Keep up the good work right you, love you, love you peace out peace out.