Co-host Jenene has a converation with longtime queer lesbian friend, Terysa. She's originally from the Bronx, NY and currently living in Phoenix, AZ enjoying her retirement.
The conversation explores the use of the word 'boob' and its various meanings and connotations. It delves into the history of the word and its association with breasts, as well as the societal attitudes towards women's bodies. The discussion also touches on the impact of clothing choices, such as bras, on women's health and comfort. The conversation highlights the importance of using respectful language and embracing one's natural body.
In this conversation, Jenene and Terysa discuss various topics related to femininity, body image, and societal expectations. They touch on the use of language and how certain words are associated with different genders. They also discuss the discomfort and shame that can be associated with breasts and menstruation, and the importance of embracing and celebrating these aspects of womanhood. They talk about the power of the female body and the need for acceptance and empowerment. They also mention the importance of having open and honest conversations about menstruation with young girls, and the need to break the narrative of shame and embarrassment surrounding it.
Overall, the conversation highlights the need for acceptance, understanding, and celebration of the female body.
Note: We want to recognize and acknowledge that not every human with breasts is comfortable with them. Perhaps this information can be taken into consideration by all and shared with those who you feel may beneift from it. There's something for everyone to take away.
Keywords: boob, breasts, slang, women's bodies, bras, language, respect, natural body, femininity, body image, societal expectations, language, breasts, menstruation, shame, empowerment, acceptance, celebration
Takeaways:
Chapters:
00:00 Introduction and Technical Difficulties
13:53 Societal Attitudes Towards Women's Bodies
36:36 Breaking the Shame Cycle
43:53 Honoring the Maiden
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TikTok
Facebook
Want to see the video? Check us out on YouTube.
Co-host Jenene has a converation with longtime queer lesbian friend, Terysa. She's originally from the Bronx, NY and currently living in Phoenix, AZ enjoying her retirement.
The conversation explores the use of the word 'boob' and its various meanings and connotations. It delves into the history of the word and its association with breasts, as well as the societal attitudes towards women's bodies. The discussion also touches on the impact of clothing choices, such as bras, on women's health and comfort. The conversation highlights the importance of using respectful language and embracing one's natural body.
In this conversation, Jenene and Terysa discuss various topics related to femininity, body image, and societal expectations. They touch on the use of language and how certain words are associated with different genders. They also discuss the discomfort and shame that can be associated with breasts and menstruation, and the importance of embracing and celebrating these aspects of womanhood. They talk about the power of the female body and the need for acceptance and empowerment. They also mention the importance of having open and honest conversations about menstruation with young girls, and the need to break the narrative of shame and embarrassment surrounding it.
Overall, the conversation highlights the need for acceptance, understanding, and celebration of the female body.
Note: We want to recognize and acknowledge that not every human with breasts is comfortable with them. Perhaps this information can be taken into consideration by all and shared with those who you feel may beneift from it. There's something for everyone to take away.
Keywords: boob, breasts, slang, women's bodies, bras, language, respect, natural body, femininity, body image, societal expectations, language, breasts, menstruation, shame, empowerment, acceptance, celebration
Takeaways:
Chapters:
00:00 Introduction and Technical Difficulties
13:53 Societal Attitudes Towards Women's Bodies
36:36 Breaking the Shame Cycle
43:53 Honoring the Maiden
Instagram
TikTok
Facebook
Want to see the video? Check us out on YouTube.
yep, boobies, boobies, wait what?
Speaker 2:you said you're a little nervous at first yeah, with logging on are we speaking of?
Speaker 1:uh, foolish, stupid people?
Speaker 2:yes, no, so you were nervous about logging on or about just chatting about boobies, just yeah, just yeah, everything it's okay about just chatting about boobies.
Speaker 1:Yeah, just the yeah, everything it's okay. So what about these boobies?
Speaker 2:Well, so I guess that we're just going to discuss the etymology. And for those that don't know what etymology is, it's basically the study of the origin of words and how they have come to change their meaning throughout history, of the origin of words and how they have come to change their meaning throughout history.
Speaker 1:So, specifically, we're going to be discussing the word boob. It has a long history.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I know for you and I specifically, we hate that word.
Speaker 1:I do. It doesn't describe the breast to me. It describes a person that's stupid or foolish or acts in a foolish behavior way. So I would not like to be. And there's a lot of words to describe the breast. You know you have boob, you have boobie, you have jugs another word I don't like, another word I don't like, and those are all slang words. But you know what a vulgar slang word is. Which is surprising to me is titties and tit, and I'm thinking how is that vulgar compared to jug, like they are tits, and teats, like they feed children? So I don't know how those two specific words that actually are part of the body are considered vulgar. You know it's just silly to me, but yeah, it's, it's crazy.
Speaker 2:It's humanity. So you were the first person that actually brought this to my attention, that the word boob wasn't actually an anatomy word. This to my attention, that the word boob wasn't actually an anatomy word, and ever since?
Speaker 1:what'd you say? I wasn't raised that way.
Speaker 2:Well, it's funny because I was, but I don't, everybody else was too. It was one of these things where you grow up in that environment, everybody else is saying the same thing, so you don't really question certain things that are just status quo, right? So when you brought it to my attention, I went and I did a deep dive and I gave up ownership of that word and using that word in my own vocabulary, because I just felt that it wasn't, it didn't resonate, it wasn't in alignment with the, the temple that I know my body is. I'm not going to walk around using the word boob and of course we're going to get into what the definitions are, but I'm not going to use that to describe my body part.
Speaker 2:The other interesting thing is that that I feel that especially now, but as a history this has always been the case, but even more so I think it's gained momentum a little bit and maybe you can comment to that. But control over women's bodies and their reproductive purpose and the naming of them and how they're used and not used, or used and abused, it's always, it's always politicized, it's always like a hot button, political issue or some kind of somebody else wants ownership over our bodies, what we do with them, how we present, what we call them, and so on. And so when I looked up the definition of boob, I was like, okay, this makes sense, this is in alignment with that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, most men like to describe women's bodies for their own personal pleasure, and we're still going through it today. I mean, it's 2024. And it's horrific what they're trying to do with women's bodies, especially in Arizona today. But that's where you're located, I am, and they reinstated a law from 1865 when Arizona wasn't even a state and women didn't have rights to vote and you couldn't marry a black person, and it's just so ridiculous because that's where they want us to be barefoot and pregnant. They don't want us educated, because we're too powerful when we're educated. We're a powerful force to mess with when we're educated, and that's what's threatening everybody.
Speaker 1:So, but you know, as far as boobs and bubble heads and all those different definitions for for women's body parts, it goes back to like the 16th century, those original words, especially in, uh, scottish and german dialect. That's what they. It was originally boobyie. Boobie was the original word, then it went down to boob and then all to describe the word breasts. So it's been around for a very long time and women have just accepted the fact, you know, and a lot of women didn't wear bras back then.
Speaker 1:You know, when I was a child, my grandmother bought me my first bra. It was all cotton, a white fabric. I kind of felt restricted and by the time I was 15, I just didn't wear a bra until I was 34 and I got pregnant Because I had firm breasts. They defied gravity, they dropped the pencil and my tits were beautiful. They still are the pencil test.
Speaker 2:Yes, I can still pass that, by the way, and I'm over 40.
Speaker 1:Well, I breastfed two children so I can't do that. But you know, it's just amazing how fabric has changed. I believe in cotton. If you're going to wear underwear or undergarments, they should be cotton, they shouldn't be nylon or any of that stuff. You should have free breezes throughout your body parts and bras, especially underwire bras. They block, see all these underarm these glands. They clean out everything that's in your body and when you're wearing an underwire bra it kind of blocks those glands and then stuff gets stuck. You get sick, whatever.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's the lymph drainage that it blocks. Yes, the lymph drainage.
Speaker 1:Correct. So you know, it's just. For years they wanted to tie up the body of a woman human, even with corsets. Way back then they would squeeze a body into a corset, where it came to the part where women decided to use corsets that were having medical issues due to wearing a bra. And that was way back too. And how do you squeeze somebody into a metal trap like that? And just so that you could look at an A-shape with a big butt.
Speaker 1:Women were European. They didn't have big butts. They have the English asses like mine, flat that. And and just so that you could look at an a-shape with a big butt. Women were european. They didn't have big butts. They have the english asses like mine, flat. They weren't big and round. They had them all puffed up in the back to accentuate their ass.
Speaker 1:And that's the whole thing about living with a man, men in society, trying to take control over a woman's body, like they've done it over the centuries, and it's just unfortunate, like it's really unfortunate. And you heard of howard hughes, right, the aviator and the that guy from I have. Yes, well, he created the first under our underwire bra for Jane Russell. Jane Russell, yeah, in a film called the Outlaw. She hated wearing it so secretly she would wear her own bra in a lot of the movie and then when they had to do the close-ups, she would put the bra on and it was like a bullet. It was shaped like a bullet. She has great breasts. I actually put the movie on yesterday just to get a glimpse of what the movie entailed, because I never really watched it as a woman. She had beautiful breasts. Why would you bind them up like that? It's ridiculous. It's too crazy for me to even battle.
Speaker 2:That was the evolution of the first push-up. Bra though, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, crazy for me to even battle that was. That was the evolution of the first push-up bra, though, yeah, yeah, well, yeah, not underwire bra specifically, but specifically the push-up. He created the first underwire bra, but and that was after world war ii because domestically we were able to use metal. Then, prior to the war, we weren't able to use the metal because they needed it for war, for war things that they were doing.
Speaker 2:So you know it's interesting how language evolves but also clothing. So you're talking about the corset which is kind of like a, I think like a legal straight jacket or something, or like a something that's exactly.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's not, it's not good. Like, if I'm going to be bond in bondage, it's going to be because that's where I want to be, not because you're telling me to be there right, because you made that choice yeah, and it's a different concept altogether.
Speaker 1:But I have the power. You know, women didn't have the power, you know, and they were shamed for it a lot of times. So you know, I don't wear bras still today, because I don't like wearing bras. They're made out of nylon, they're synthetic fabric, so I wear cotton t-shirts and when I go to the store I'll just put on a blouse with a t-shirt. That's snug, and then if my breasts move when I walk, I don't care, because I'm a human being and that's what happens to women when they get older. And you know, your breasts move, it's a natural part of movement of the body, just like your hands move when you walk being able to dress and present freely, but also the aging process in this country is not honored.
Speaker 2:So when you have a female in and of herself trying to present to the world and it's kind of like I think about COVID, where they made you wear the masks to shut you up and everybody thought like, oh, I'm just being healthy and I'm just being responsible, no, basically they're, they're stepping on your neck and they're telling you to shut up, right, because they don't want to hear what you have to say. And that was, that was global, it was. So. It's kind of the same concept where you're a female, you have your reproductive parts, but they're shamed. We grow up in environments and and the cultural narrative is you should be shameful.
Speaker 2:Um, I have family members who don't talk about their menses. They have their. They have the same words, kind of like boob for breast, it's like period. I don't really like that term. Personally, I, I prefer something else. I love the moon time. I love that. I, I know, know. People have different euphemisms. They. They have like, um, shark time or ant flow or uh, I'm on the rag, I don't know. There's tons of them, there's tons of them on the rag.
Speaker 1:Have you heard of that one on the rag. Yeah, I was, that's how I was. I was raised everybody because in them days we had nobody, they didn't have tampons. When I was really young, most women wore rags, that's way back when they didn't have.
Speaker 2:And we should go back to that they wore rags and they washed them back to them, that's where that comes from.
Speaker 1:But, uh, like. I was raised in a family that we described body parts for what they were. My mother called them breasts and penises. But when I had my kids, I didn't told them this is your penis, this is your vagina, this is your breast, this is your chest vagina has a lot of different euphemisms and different words.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that are are not appropriate or not politically correct, I think.
Speaker 1:America has a problem with sexuality and body parts. Europe isn't like that. America is. They're so body shamed and so afraid of being any part of sexual, afraid of being having being any part of sexual. They have to hide it because either they're guilty or they were never taught the beauty of the human body. They were never taught. Hey, here's a mirror, go check yourself out like or go touch yourself.
Speaker 1:Even, yeah, even that has shame attached to it, my daughter I said here's a mirror, go find yourself, go see what you have down there and go look at yourself, because it's important. You know they're not going to know that that's an important part of their body to be sexual Not at you know, seven years old and not sexual. But I got news for you they're exploring still on their own self. Because we do that, we touch ourselves growing up, we want to know what it feels like and a lot of people try to say no. And I remember having my kids. We used to go to the Orchard Beach this beach in New York and they never wore clothes. I always had them walk around naked. People used to get pissed off at me why don't you put something on your kid? I go no, they're walking around naked.
Speaker 2:There's no reason for them to wear a diaper to go swimming in the beach. And if they should, I don't.
Speaker 1:I buried in the sand by now. And how many diapers are in Orchard Beach now? Too many to even know? Yeah, but that's so, you know. Like I never put a diaper in the beach because I honor mother nature. But you know, it's just. We're taught at a very some of us were taught at a very young age not to embrace who we are, any part of our body. Like most people learn on their own, and tragically, a lot of times that doesn't work out too well. You know it really doesn't, because you experiment and then you say you know, that's not what I had in mind and I wish I knew better, but you don't, because people aren't giving you great guidance. And then when you have friends, they're just kind of side by side with you because they're figuring out on themselves as well, and then you experiment with them and so on and so forth, be it women or men or both. Like we experiment with everybody because we're an intuitive human being. You know, that's how we are.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we're in that exploratory stage looking for answers. Yeah, a lot of times our parents are too embarrassed or they carry shame themselves so they're too embarrassed to actually have the conversation with us.
Speaker 1:Right Because of their own difficulty with sexuality.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it was in the older generations. I think it was harder too, because they were more conservative than we are now, right, but let's jump back a minute. So we were talking about calling body parts by their appropriate or their proper names, right? And even vagina. A lot of people think that when they look down, they see their vagina, when, in actuality, when they look down, they see their vulva. The vagina is actually the opening to the vulva, and a lot of times there's misconceptions about the clitoris, because they think it's just external and there's no internal part of the clitoris, and so there's a lot of things that you know just get passed on incorrectly, and I think that's a detriment to us, not just as humans, but especially as women.
Speaker 1:And a lot of women don't know that the clitoris is about eight inches long. Yeah, they don't know that. Copy that, because they just think it's this little cute little nibula or little cherry on the tip of the bottom of their vagina or on the top, I should say and it really is like we're about eight inches long. So yeah, it's crazy.
Speaker 2:And then also just to touch back about what you were saying about the euphemism on the rag, because at one point it literally was. You know, those generations used rags made of something from the earth, or that's organic or that's not toxic or that's not lynching toxins into your most sensual parts of your body. Because we're so cellular and we have we're. Our whole body is made up of pores and the skin is the largest organ in our body, but also our skin has so many sensory points to it and I feel now in my early 40s and I'm experimenting and exploring still with my own body, because nobody ever had these conversations when I was growing up, nobody ever even thought about it. You know, these are kind of underground, if you will.
Speaker 2:Topics that are more taboo, they're more controversial, they're more polarizing, are more taboo, they're more controversial, they're more polarizing, and we don't know what. We don't know until somebody brings it up or we read it in a book or it kind of drops in for us and so the tampon is super toxic. Pads, I think, are bulky and I just can't deal with them and I know some people are going to be like, well, I'm too heavy, there's no way I could ever free bleed and my whole thing is I don't even wear underwear because, like you were saying before about just like letting things aerate and you have the cross. Ventilation and circulation and hygiene is not hard, it really isn't. But so many people, I think, struggle with it because they're in these habits that they think they need to have or that they're comfortable with, or because they're not in an environment that they can really explore from that.
Speaker 1:I wore underarm deodorant once just to try it when I was a kid. Never wore it because I like the way I smell and that's what. That's what people can't handle. They can't handle their own natural scent and a lot of times you're not eating well, you're not going to smell well, you're going to smell just like what you eat. So you have to be aware, you have to be aware of that like and sometimes, like I'll get a glimpse, not a glimpse, I'll get a scent of myself and I'll go you'll get a whiff yeah, I, I know, I said glance, but I get a whiff and I just take a deep breath because I like the way I smell.
Speaker 1:And it's just unfortunate that this society wants you to douche, use underarm deodorant, use foot deodorant, use face deodorant. They just want you to cover everything up and all that stuff goes in your pores and all of it is toxic. It makes you sick. All of it is toxic.
Speaker 2:Yes, it makes you sick Learn how to eat well.
Speaker 2:And you'll smell better. People come into my chiropractic office all the time and they're like I'm in so much back pain and I don't know why, and I'm like, okay, and we explore the vast array of root causes that it could be. Of course, my lens is the nervous system. So what's affecting your nervous system? You have a higher nervous tone. Most people do. We're all in fight or flight. We're all trying to fight and and process through all the toxins in every layer. So from bras to douching I don't douche, but people do to the air we breathe, to detergents, to the food that we put in our bodies.
Speaker 2:There's so many different layers of things, of toxins, that we're exposed to and that also affects our nervous tone. It makes us in fight or flight, it makes us constantly in a fight state and there's no one singular cause and I guess, as a you know, as a result of that, there's no one singular solution to fixing the back pain. Yes, we can get your nervous system you know, firing properly, but you have to do the right things in your lifestyle that support holding your adjustment and keeping your nervous tone at neutral. This is true. I mean, it's always a compilation of things. Right, it's always. But what I'm saying is I think people reduce it to oh, I hurt myself at the gym or oh, I'm going to get this adjustment, it's going to fix my back pain. A lot of times most times that are not it's environmental, and then on top of that you have other layers of emotional, spiritual, psychological, etc. We have microtraumas in every area of our lives, that we house a lot of emotions in our tissues. So it's very layered.
Speaker 1:It is very late and it's individual too. One recipe doesn't fit everybody, because we're all different on different levels. But I just feel that if you're going to say breasts, say breasts, don't say boobies, out of respect for yourself and and yeah, you're insulting the human body and you're a woman, you have to honor that shit. I mean, just stand guard and just honor your whole physical and mental state and your spiritual state. Like you're in charge of that. You're responsible for that, and if people get upset with you because you're not wearing a bra, I'll just I'll just shake them up, man, I just shake them up, so then I'll pull my shirt up.
Speaker 2:I've done that thousands of times I am not condoning that, just just kidding. Um, no, but let's jump back to the definition of boo before we jump into the whole how they, how it relates to bras and all that. Okay, so some of the I want to share some of the definitions that I found and then you can share some of the things that that you found okay. But when I looked up the definition of boob, um, I found these definitions okay, ready, and this is miriam webster to start off. These are synonyms, not the actual definition. Synonyms for the word boob, mistake, error, blunder, brick. And then wikipedia it says a slang word for a woman's breast, an insult for a stupid or foolish person. Boob or boobs may also refer to arts and entertainment. I thought that was kind of interesting. And then the Wiktionary it says clipped form of booby appeared from the 20th century. I mean, if you just look it up on Google and just do a quick glance, you'll see the word boob, dunce, fathead, fool, goof, and there's different theories about where it came from.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they're from all over the place. You have the British, it's a verb and they call a boob a reaction of making a foolish mistake, like that's how they describe a boob Making a foolish mistake. But I didn't find any of those bricks or any of that. I just found the jugs and, uh, the boob. Yeah, that's, I like jugs to a certain extent, but you know she got some pair of jugs, yeah.
Speaker 2:I mean exactly, Exactly Like that that is environmental, but it's also used for emphasis, I think. You know I don't think it's necessarily derogatory.
Speaker 1:No, it's just like to represent big breasts.
Speaker 2:Yeah, getting your point across, right?
Speaker 1:But even like.
Speaker 2:I'm looking right now. The mnemonic dictionary says boob meaning boob, booby, dope, dumbbell, dummy, pinhead, bosom, breast knocker, tit, titty, blunder, drop the ball, goof and sin Wow.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I didn't find any of those. I Googled. So then my computer was messing with my head. But I Googled and found a few things from the German, and they have the same thing the German and the Scotch they have the same definitions, but it came from the word bubby.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the word boob originally comes from booby and then it was cut down to boob, and that goes back to the 16th century. So they just created a bunch of words to describe a woman's anatomy and throw a dig into it. You know, you don't hear anybody any words for the penis. I don't, I don't just the penis. Well, there's dick well, yeah don't be a dick but uh, I don't.
Speaker 1:I don't use dick, I use penis. If you're a dick, I use it to like because you're an asshole. That's when I use dick. But you know otherwise I just use real words, that, uh, the bodies are called just side tangent.
Speaker 2:It's funny that if somebody is acting sort of out of respect or whatnot, that we use literally, um, dick, asshole. There are two anatomical body parts and then the word pussy is used to reference somebody who is a scaredy cat. And I just think that's so funny because it kind of parallels what society wants us to feel about feminism and masculinity, or males and females, is that females are associated with being scaredy cats and just not having courage. But then if you're a male, you're, you're masculinizing word is dick because you can be forceful or bruteful or forward, or you know what I mean like words that go along with the patriarchy, so to speak. Right, yeah, so it's very interesting. Or if you're or asshole, it's kind of like that's clenched, so that person is you're taking a lot of, it's a lot of shit's clenched.
Speaker 1:So that person is You're taking a lot of shit. It's a lot of shit. When you talk about an asshole, you're talking about a body part that eliminates your waist. But I understand pussy. I mean they call a cat a pussy cat. It's like oh pussy, pussy, pussy, and they identify that. But a lot, like a lot of men use that word pussy in uh, not a bad way, but in a way like hey, gonna give me some yeah, like a sexualizing yeah, sexualized, that you want to give me some of that pussy.
Speaker 1:But talking to their significant other, they're not. Well, they did do that when I was a kid, like if you were walking down the street and you were a woman, they would like cat call you, you know, and they would call you different names, like that. But I know like in some relationships they those are like pet names for each other, you know. So, yeah, but that's different. Yeah, but I'm trying to, on the whole, like it's not all bad, like there's pet names that couples use that involve tits.
Speaker 2:Well, yeah, you want to get down and dirty in the bedroom. You're going to be a little more crass, a little bit more you know, forward and but outside, in the public, you know like where I, where I work, people say boobs.
Speaker 1:I just look at them and say who's stupid here? And they don't know what I'm talking about. Just like you didn't know what I was first telling you, it's just like what he's talking about. Stupid like you're stupid.
Speaker 2:Yeah yeah, and it's the same thing also, you know, with with um, with bras. Yeah, you know, I haven't. I haven't worn a bra in god. I can't remember the last time I wore an actual bra like the ones that snap in the back. Oh, um, I I ditched those years ago and I moved to the sports bra, which I liked better, because I didn't feel I was having to wear something unnatural that made me feel uncomfortable in terms of like the underwire and the, so it was hard to find them without the extra padding and things like that, and I'm I'm very androgynous presenting, so sometimes I don't feel like having things protruding more than more than I do naturally from my body, and so bras for me were like I don't want to deal with those, and so I went to the sport sports bra because you have to wear something, right, I'm, I'm a B cup, I'm very perky, um, my, my nipples are very sensitive, so if they rub, they.
Speaker 1:You know, it depends on where you are that you have to wear something.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, I'm just saying in general, in public, right, and so I was wearing sports bras for a while and then they just they started to get so I started to feel so restricted because I'm I'm as I get older, I guess I'm paying more attention to my body and I'm more affirming, and so my relationship with my body is better yeah that well, the reason I chose them in the first place was because they kind of acted like like a binder, binder right In a way, and, like I said, for somebody androgynous presenting like me, that was like, okay, this is cool, it's kind of like a binder, but it's, it's a sports bra and I work out a lot, so it's kind of a win-win. It's easy, but nowadays I don't wear anything. I can't wear anything because I feel like I can't breathe. I feel like it's extra work and I'm figuring out how I can deal with the fact that I am smaller and more perkier, and I do.
Speaker 2:My nipples are very sensitive, so a little bit of rubbing in there. It's annoying. I'm at work or it's it's, you know, when you're not in a situation where you're being sexual, it's, it can hurt, it's annoying. And so I came up with a couple of different things that I'm trying either wearing like a guinea tea, or wearing pasties, or doing something where I can't. Yeah, what's your thought on pasties? Are there chemicals in those? Because if there are, I'm gonna be pissed.
Speaker 1:Just reminding me of my dancing days.
Speaker 2:That's funny. So, uh, teresa's from the Bronx and she used to go go way back, way back in the day. How many generations ago, is that? No, I'm kidding.
Speaker 1:Like in the 80s.
Speaker 2:When, when I was a twinkle?
Speaker 1:No, exactly, yeah, crazy, crazy, that's's so crazy you were doing that in 1980 I was being born yeah, I was even thinking of they sell round band-aids, but I don't know if there's chlorine in the cotton that they put on the band-aid, but that could be an option also. You know, you just get the round band-aid, put it on and maybe that could work for you. But I prefer the guinea t-shirt myself. I'll put two on if I'm not going to wear a bra and go shopping, just because the two give me more support and I have a larger breast. So you could tell that I'm not wearing a bra because my tits aren't standing over here. They're basically here in a natural state. But you know they don't move as much when I wear two t-shirts.
Speaker 1:So I prefer that, but I've always wanted a guinea tea.
Speaker 2:Yeah, me too. I'm wearing one right now. Can you tell I'm not wearing a bra no.
Speaker 1:No, I can't tell because I can't see. Oh, I would have to put my glasses on.
Speaker 2:Eye surgeries. Yeah so Everything else you've been through.
Speaker 1:But you know, it's just something that we have to deal with as far as society, especially men viewing us and getting pissed if we're not, if we're overexposing ourselves because we feel like we're looking hot that day and we want to rock it outside, and people look at us like are you slut? Yeah, okay, that's how I feel today. Don't knock it. You know, like we have different, different days, that we feel different and we want to dress different to accentuate those things and people get upset if my skirt's too short. You know, I was talking to a. She's young, she works a co-worker of mine and she's graduating high school and she was showing me her prom dress and I thought it was hot. You know, it was black. It had a little sachet on the side that if she picked it up you could see her thigh and you don't. She don't have to wear a bra because the way the corset was that she didn't have to wear a bra. So I looked at her.
Speaker 1:I said you know, if you decide to buy that dress, I suggest you get a pair of thigh highs. And she looked at me. She goes thigh highs. I said, yeah, nobody's gonna see them until you start dancing and swirling that sachet around and you know what. It's going to be hot, get yourself a pair of thigh highs. I said, accentuate what you had because she's a beautiful girl. I mean, yeah, she's in high school, but you know, rock it out. She's still a woman, a young woman, yeah, yeah, don't follow everybody else in your high school. Do something different that people are going to say, damn, you remember that chick that wore those hats with that dress? That's what you want to do.
Speaker 2:Stand out from the crowd and everybody was like looking at me, going, teresa, only you would say that I go, yeah well, unfortunately, you know, when we want to accentuate certain things and, you know, flaunt our beauty or just show it off in some kind of way I know I could speak for myself, being in certain environments it's very difficult because our culture is such that people look at us in very objectifying ways and very ways of, you know, just sexualizing women because they're not around it and it's it's. There's a taboo which I think for certain people makes it hotter because it's that thing they can't have Right. And then so we go out in public dressed in certain ways, and then we're getting cat called, we're getting comments, um, and in a way even a lot of times putting ourselves in harm's way because there's repercussions of that. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So that's when you're going to pick up, put on your big girl pants and say I don't give a fuck and not pay it. You can't listen to everybody. I mean, I'm at the age now If somebody, if I got dressed a certain way and somebody made fun of me, I would take it personal. But that was like when I was in my 20s. When I got into my 30s, I there was no Halls Barred. It was just like I know who I am, I'm going to dress the way I want and if nobody likes it I really don't care. They don't pay my rent and I'm like that till today, like I don't really care because I'm 69 years old and I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 1:It's too old for me to be giving a shit about people thinking about oh, your tits are hanging and you're walking without a bra and you're an old lady. No, I'm not an old lady, I just have a high number. I'm good. But you know people can't take it personal. You can't take everybody's opinion personal. That's where you get emotionally messed up. You got to take ownership of who you are. Let people talk about you if that's what they need to do, because they ain't got courage to do it themselves and just say that's who it is and I'm okay with it, you know because you know who you are, but a lot of people don't know who they are, like that girl I was talking to, like she just was freaking out because she's young and and she probably deals with peer pressure all the time.
Speaker 2:I don't deal with pressure yeah, address and express how you want and embrace who you are and what you have, but also don't I mean this is just like a side sidebar disclaimer, don't be putting yourself in dangerous environments right you know, that's a real. That's a real thing too, but it's crazy. Like you know, I'm in my 40s and I still think about that. I still think about do I want to go out at night? Do I want to stop this gas station by myself? Do I want you know?
Speaker 1:it doesn't matter how I'm dressed. Yeah Well, those are different. Those are things that are called survival. It's a survival mode because you have to know where to go. Unfortunately, in this world we live in, you know, I don't drive drive at night but if I have to go somewhere, I'm going to make sure that it's an. It's a place I park my car where there's other cars no vans, no big trucks but there are other cars because I know there's going to be people there and I look. I'm always looking like I look in my glass when I'm approaching my car to see if anybody's behind me. As soon as I get in, I lock it. But that's the times that we're living in. So, yeah, you know, and it comes to not being a boob like, just don't be a boob.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I. I just I want to make an all-inclusive kind of statement here, because I know that this episode is part of our podcast life through a queer lens, and we are giving content to everybody in, you know, in the queer community or allies of the queer community, and so it's education for a lot of people and just talking points for a lot of people. But I also want to recognize that not everybody is proud of their breasts and there are certain people who are in transition or certain people who present um or identify with a different gender. So I just want to say, you know, I want to acknowledge that piece and those people and just say, you know, this is more. This episode here is, uh, more for education for maybe people that you know that do have breasts, so that you can change the conversation around them.
Speaker 2:I have a colleague who is a chiropractor down in Florida and she just developed this program for moms and their young daughters who are about to start to menstruate and have their hormonal changes, and her program is called Period Pro and basically it helps moms have the conversation with their daughter about the upcoming changes of their body and what's entailed and so on and so forth, and I think that's such a great idea because nobody's having those conversations and if they are, it's after the fact, and even if it's coming from a mom, a lot of times they forget to cover a lot of pieces and then for the kid it's embarrassing.
Speaker 2:They just found out that they're going to be bleeding out of their vagina every month for the rest of their adult life, until menopause of course. But menopause is normally not part of the conversation because it's too much for them to be able to process at that young age. Right, like I got my menses, I started my moon time when I was nine years old, which is very young. Most people. Like I got my menses, I started my moon time when I was nine years old, which is very young Most. Most people start I don't know, I guess like 12 maybe.
Speaker 1:But I know that they're getting it earlier these days.
Speaker 1:I was 13. But I believe that when you do have mothers and daughters and there's going to be a moon time celebration, it should be a celebration, not just sit down and talk to them. It should be. You should get them like fabrics of purple and yellow and red and make flowers. Maybe if you're a ritual, if you do a ritual, you could do a ritual and teach them that.
Speaker 1:But if you don't do rituals and you're not that that person like there's so many ways to honor your daughter.
Speaker 1:Take them out into the woods, take them to the beach, just sit down with them and reevaluate, like, reiterate, all the elements that are on this world. Maybe go pick stones and stuff like that and put them in the sachet, just so that she could, you know, have it and honor and remember that day. But it is a celebration. It shouldn't be a distress, it should just be. And even if you have mothers with daughters that have other daughters and mothers and you could do it as a group, that's even better, because then you have all the children that are the same age group, that could interact with each other and the mothers could interact with the other mothers and see what works for them. But it should be a celebration, because they're entering the maiden part of their life and then they'll go into the mom and then they'll go into the crone. But the maiden is very important. It's the beginning of the woman that she's going to become in the crown, so it should be honored and celebrated.
Speaker 2:Not full of shame yeah?
Speaker 1:You get different colors Purple and red I always recommend just to have to tie ribbons or fabric around them. Dance if you want to.
Speaker 2:It's a very big celebration around them, dance if you want to like. It's a very big celebration. So, yeah, it should be definitely honored and embraced. I don't think it ever is, I don't hear about it, but I think what I just to go back real quick to what I was saying about my friend in florida and her course, I think that's awesome. And I was telling another friend of mine and, uh, she said you what you should have the married match of that course for men as well and teach them about female moon time and not to shame women when they're dating them and not to make them feel dirty and not to make them feel ashamed and perpetuate that shame cycle and how to good touch, bad touch and all the things that kids don't get when they're younger and all the things, right, that kids don't get when they're younger.
Speaker 1:You know, have the Bad touch. Should be taught way before the moon time. Should be taught when they're starting to walk and talk.
Speaker 2:I agree it can be reiterated and re-emphasized in those classes by other people who are trusted professionals that you know. Take the mom and the child and it just takes the pressure and the burden off the parent. And it just takes the pressure and the burden off the parent and it makes it less weird for the kid. I know, when I was getting my talk from my mom, any questions? Uh, what I don't. First of all, I didn't even know what questions to ask A, b. Even if I did have a question, I was so embarrassed to ask it Like do you think I'm actually going to ask that? Cause it's. It's just you're processing so much you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'd never had anybody ask me anything. My grandmother did, but she didn't touch base on it. She just said, hey, you need one of these.
Speaker 2:Oh, my God.
Speaker 1:That was as far as it went. But you know, going back to what you were saying, how when you have your moon time, you free bleed. I did that all the time and when I was with different, various partners in my life, they would freak out because I'd wake up and have all this redness all over me and the sheets. And what are you doing? I can't, I can't wear a pad because my flow is very heavy. So I why am I going to wear a pad? And I never wore tampons to clog it up. I just bled and then in the morning I just take the sheets and wash them. No big deal. But you know that's free bleeding is a great thing to do, especially if you have a partner. That's okay with it because they're going to get bloody. I know my nose got bloody, but I would think it would bring you together closer, but it doesn't, not all the time.
Speaker 2:I mean, it depends on how they feel about it. You know, in my opinion, it's really important to find a partner who's really accepting, embracing, because that's the whole reason why we're doing this episode right now is to talk about acceptance and empowerment and being able to be free and who we are and present the way that we were, in our nature, given bodies here. So you know, when you're with a partner and you're spending your life with them and they're looking at you and shaming you for doing something, that's natural because you, you, you you're expressing in your body who you are and what you were given and it's, I don't know, to me. That's like that is perpetuating that shame cycle that we're talking about. I would be like, uh, grounds for divorce, bye, like lovingly, I can love you from afar, but yeah, I wouldn't deal with that I like that.
Speaker 1:I don't have it anymore, but it's a good concept. It's something that brings an individual closer to their own self.
Speaker 2:I wish I knew about it when I was younger and I wasn't so detached from it. Because I remember when I started getting mine every month and my friends, the talk was I'm so annoyed, I got my period, I'm going on vacation and this is ruining my beach time or whatever. That was just the narrative. And I remember when I was in New York City and I was working for the company, but I won't say it on here I was in Midtown working around 34th Street and I had a friend who I was working with, my coworker, and she said the same thing about going on vacation, how it was going to ruin it, and I remember at that moment her words just kind of echoed and I really absorbed them and I knew they didn't resonate but I just didn't know how to really fix it 't. I knew they didn't resonate but I just didn't know, like, how to really fix it. And so I just started telling, you know, telling my friends, I'm going to break the narrative because I don't resonate with that, and if they accept it, fine, and if they don't, whatever. So I tell my sister and I tell my friends and people in my life you need to embrace that time of the month, because that's your power. We are powerful beings and we can. We can recreate. We can create and recreate life because of that and we just have to embrace it. It is what it is. There's nothing that we can do about it. But if we reject it, we get sick and then and then we affirm out loud all this negative talk about ourselves and each other and that becomes the community, that becomes the circle and the energy circle or energy circuit that we create and perpetuate.
Speaker 2:So I, I never talk like that anymore. I used to, but nowadays it's like oh cool, I have my moon time. It's never a burden, it never is. It doesn't matter what I'm doing. I don't care if I'm swimming, I don't care if I have an interview, if I, if I have um, you know the symptoms. The usual suspect of symptoms like cramps or this or that, or like your uterus distended or headaches, um, exhaustion, back pain. I know people, a lot of people, get sacral pain. Some people don't have any symptoms. I didn't have symptoms for a long time. If I'm under, under stress, sometimes I might, sometimes I. It all depends on what the body's going through.
Speaker 1:And then at the end of the day.
Speaker 2:Exactly, yeah, orgasm.
Speaker 1:Because it massages the internal tissues.
Speaker 2:Yep, yep. Another good thing would be to get adjusted. Yeah, obviously, that's my lens, and I know. But yeah, there's I. I mean there's different things that you can do, but yeah, that's, that's one of the good ones.
Speaker 1:But you know another shame topic, right but I like that story with your friend doing the party.
Speaker 2:That's really cool yeah it's so great, it's a safe space to have conversations and for people to ask questions, and it takes the pressure off the mom and it takes the pressure off the mom and it takes the pressure off the kid, but it also brings them closer together, you know, and in a safe way, and it covers. It covers all of the things that you might, as a parent, forget to tell your kid and they have to learn the hard way, right, you know, or they might not think to ask.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 1:I mean when my daughter was starting to get hers, she had a really bad time. It's like she was in, like, in the beginning I thought she was just using it as an excuse not to go to school, because the first three days she was literally in hell, like had so much pain. But it continued to happen every month, every month, every month and eventually, after time, it just stopped, like she didn't get the pain as she did today. I don't know if she still has pain, but it's hard, you know, especially when you first get it and you don't know what's going on and you don't know why you feel the way you do and why your body hurts the way it hurts, feel the way you do and why your body hurts the way it hurts. I never had cramps ever. Yeah, I I felt when I was going to get it because I smelled my. My physical scent changed and it it smelled like iron and I was like, okay, I'm going to be getting my moon time soon, because I'm like iron is everywhere that's another thing.
Speaker 2:That's shame too. What the iron, oh just the scent that is associated with getting your moon time every month? You know it does change.
Speaker 1:It does change, but I knew. I knew when I was getting, because I had the variables. Like I knew I was my my womb would swell up, my body odor would change and it was just going to be like a matter of days or whatever and then I would have it and then that would be it. But I never experienced cramps and I just always bled heavy and I just let it go. I just like, ok, let's just do it, let it come out, I don't care, but I enjoyed when I liked, when I had my moon time, I just felt like I was and a lot of times like I would go outside and get the blood.
Speaker 1:So this is my great grandmother. She never wore underwear and she was a farmer and she would go outside and urinate on all the plants and have a moon time or whatever, in the dirt. My mother was the same way. She would get her moon time, put it in the dirt and the soil in her yard. I was the same way too, in different areas that I lived in where I had the ability to take my moon time and put it in the dirt, because that's a really powerful ritual If you're ever doing a ritual and you want it to be stronger than your salt water. You get your moon time and just rub it in that dirt. So that's another good thing and I just embraced my moon time. I never like, oh, I gotta go to the beach and have my period.
Speaker 1:No, I never did that that's nice I never actually wore a pad when I went to the beach, or a tampon. Well, I never wore tampons because I knew when I got in that water it was cold and I wasn't going to bleed, like it would stop me from bleeding for a period of time. I don't know what that was like the water in the human body.
Speaker 2:It's a fight or flight response. It's kind of like you're either in fight or flight or you're in rest and digest what we know as fight or flight. That's when you're in sympathetic nervous system. You're in your fight or flight, which is also known as feed, or feed and breed. So you're either hunting and gathering these are old terms, right, hunting and gathering you're in defense mode because you're you're hunting for food, or you're breeding, which means you're mating, or you're just having sexual pleasure, whatever technically, um, because you're not in parasympathetics, your auto, your autonomic function, stops because you're in fight or flight. When you're in parasympathetics, that's when your autonomic function is restored and you get back to digesting properly and breathing at a normal heart rate and all the things.
Speaker 2:When you're having sex, your heart rate is off the charts, or at least it should be, unless you're one of those mattress queens, you know I don't know, like I never knew that at then, like I never.
Speaker 1:I just thought it was something that happened because I was in cold water and my body said okay, you're not gonna bleed right now because you're in water and it's cold, but when you get out of the water you might bleed. But I never thought of it like that because I never knew that. So that was something learned today yeah, that's cool, right.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's not to say. It's not to say that you're not going to bleed when you're having sex with your partner. It's just. It just depends on where you are in the um, in, in, in the process of intimacy and and raising your what do you want to call it on your journey to climax.
Speaker 1:We'll say yeah, that's good.
Speaker 2:That's good, I like that yeah, but um yeah, is there anything else that you want to? We're coming up on the hour here, so is there anything? Else that you want to add any value, any gems, any pearls of wisdom, because, uh, I know that you're now past the maiden, maiden, maiden mother, mother, I'm a I'm a crone I'm in my crone. Now you're in your crone.
Speaker 1:I'm in the mother years anything over 60, anything over 60. You're a crone. You're'm in the mother years. Anything over 60. Anything over 60, you're a crone. You're a wise woman.
Speaker 2:Yeah, at least you should be.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, got to learn something, so just I mean, I would suggest people to feel comfortable with their body. I mean, if you have large breasts, you might want to get some kind of support, but not feel guilty when you don't want to wear a bra. I mean and, and know that the word is not boob, it's breast and and and embrace that, the knowledge of the power of the human body that is woman, because we can knock them down and we can pick them up. So you know, we're very powerful.
Speaker 2:And get the right kind of bra them up.
Speaker 1:So you know we're very powerful and get the right kind of bra, yeah, no, yeah, I mean we have the power to give life. So you know we have the power to nurse. But you know, just embrace the body parts, call them by the correct name and don't be embarrassed, and just be powerful as a woman.
Speaker 2:You there.
Speaker 1:I think you turned off your camera.
Speaker 2:I did.
Speaker 1:I think so my camera, so I need to plug it in. We're going to get disconnected.
Speaker 2:Plug it in. Plug it in. Yeah, you think All right. So do you have anything?
Speaker 1:else to say on the podcast before I hit stop for the recording. No, no, I don't. I. I really enjoyed my sign.
Speaker 2:Thank you for having me it was a blast, as usual.