The Art of Navigating Transitions and Embracing Change

We steer through the intricate labyrinth of life's transitions, reflecting on the significance of intentional living and mindset shifts. As we gear up for the dormant seasons of fall and winter, TJ highlights how this period can serve as fertile ground for personal growth, if navigated wisely. 

Entering your 30s is often accompanied by a shift in priorities and ambitions. We've all been there. We delve into the profound intricacies of this decade, shedding light on the power of wisdom, self-control, and informed decision-making in shaping our life's journey. In a surprising revelation, we unearth how a simple task like grocery shopping can morph into a tranquil and enriching experience. This conversation will soothe your nerves, reminding you that change, while inevitable, is also incredibly beautiful. Embrace it and watch as life's best moments unfurl.

Transcript

TJ: 0:15

Hey friends, it's TJ. And you're listening to Tea with TJ, where our love for tea, conversation and self-improvement intersect, so let's take a deeper dive into my cup and let's have a chat. Hey friends, it's TJ. So today I am having some cherry blossom tea. It is quite delicious, a hint of like, kind of like strawberry, almost Very light, very delicate. It's quite delicious. It's also a. The one that I have is a blooming tea, so it kind of opens up as you steep. It turns into this like beautiful flower. If you've not tried it, you should totally give it a try.

TJ: 1:04

Today I wanted to jump into exploring the like ever-changing landscape of life and how we embrace the transformations that like come with it. Life has a an interesting way of like constantly evolving and changing, similar to seasons. You know much like the seasons. Things just shift from one point to the next and it can be, it can be very beautiful. But I also think it's important to remember that it is inevitable, right? Change is always going to happen, whether we want to or not, and I think the more we can embrace that, the better the journey can be for us. Each season of life comes with its own set of challenges and rewards. You know we go through so much in our lives and so much change that it can be easy to not embrace that change to, to be reluctant to that change. I was sitting here thinking and wanted to just bring up today, you know, because there's just so much happening like we're going into.

TJ: 2:17

Fall, winter is right around the corner and I always feel like around this time of year is when, when we all kind of get into a little bit of a slump, right, it's another change that's happening. We're not really prepared for it and it can be kind of mentally exhausting sometimes, especially if you don't have structures set in place to aid in you, you know, getting through those more dormant times if you're dormant during the winter. I just wanted to have a quick conversation about how change can be good for us, thinking about the changes that are coming up and how we can use some of these dormant seasons to plant some more seeds, metaphorically, like to plant some more seeds for our growth for the coming year and hopefully, you know, years to come. It's important to pause and like reflect during this time. Fall and winter are probably my favorite seasons of the year because it really allows me to kind of slow down and refocus and recenter and try to get back on track about being intentional with what I want from my life, moving forward from that point on, and to really kind of like dive deeper into what that change looks like for me and, hopefully, what the rewards are when I come out of it at the other end. Because ultimately, it's inevitable, right, if you don't embrace that change, it's still going to happen regardless. So I would much rather be equipped to handle the change and make it work for me instead of the other way around. And I think that is so valuable because it helps you prioritize the things that are important to you and the goals that you have in mind for yourself and who you want to become, slash want to be ultimately. And it really opened my mind to give myself permission to adjust accordingly as I saw fit and not have to rely on external sources to feed my creativity.

TJ: 4:35

And I feel, like many of us that are in this 30 plus club, that time in your life is so specific and it feels like such a hurdle that has to be jumped. It's such a time in your life where you're reevaluating your priorities and reevaluating your life and really trying to focus and hone in on the direction that you want to go. Most of my friends at this stage in their life are looking at making sure they have retirement set up, making sure they have consistency in their work and life, in making sure that they have a work life balance, because so many of us, especially my friends who are creatives, so many of us, you know, put in so much time and energy in our 20s into other people and into other endeavors and we didn't really focus on ourselves. And now we're playing catch up Like we are, we're in our 30s and like, oh wait, no, I actually need to refocus on myself. I need to, you know, figure out what do I want out of this life, because it's my life.

TJ: 5:43

And that realization that it is your life, I think, is probably the most valuable thing I've learned being on the other side of 30. It has truly opened my mind to fully understand and comprehend that. Oh no, I get to make every choice. I get to make every decision of how I want this to play out, and I can make good decisions. I can make bad decisions and some of those things won't turn out the way that I want them to. But if I'm in control of that and I have made those decisions, then I have no qualms with anyone, right? I can't. I can't blame anyone. I can be shameless in the decisions that I make because I'm making them for myself.

TJ: 6:29

And I will say that you know, being on the other side of 30 now you know it has deepened my appreciation for wisdom, not only wisdom that I've gained myself, but wisdom from others and people who are older than me. There are so many things now that I understand that, like my mother used to say, or my grandmother used to say, I can appreciate those things now because I'm like, I'm living through those things currently. You know, I know I know the difference of how important it is to take a Saturday and clean your house, or to take a Saturday and do laundry or go to the grocery store. I have realized this about myself in my 30s is that one of my most peaceful places outside of a tea shop is going to the grocery store, because it forces me to slow down, it forces me to be present and it forces me to seriously consider what I'm actively doing in that moment and nothing else matters. It's such a rewarding experience for me and it's such a simple experience when I was away for a year. I remember going to the grocery store and like actively shopping with a budget and being intentional about the budget and saying, okay, this week I'm spending $100 on groceries because that's what I have to spend and that's within my budget, and there were things that I wanted that I had to put back because it didn't fit into the budget. And so, coming out of those experiences, now, as I'm approaching 35, I have such a deeper appreciation for those little life nuances and for those those little moments.

TJ: 8:19

And I will say that as we grow older, our desires and our priorities change. What was once a priority for me in my 20s is no longer a value to me in my 30s. It's not in alignment with what I'm trying to do with my life now and not necessarily what I truly need. And I've encountered moments now where I've realized that some of the things that I wanted and had a desire for they're no longer the things that I actually am hungry for and they didn't necessarily fulfill me the way that I thought they would. And I take that as a gentle reminder that you have to be in tune with yourself as you grow older, and I think there's A little bit of that. That comes naturally as you get older. But you do pick up things along the way from other sources and from people older than you to where you know your hearts are open and you adapt and you adjust and you pivot to make sure that your dreams are in alignment with the strategies that you are putting in place, or that you have to pivot and adjust to maybe change the dream itself.

TJ: 9:38

I had a very specific view of what I wanted my life to be in New York when I left college, and that is completely different than what I wrote out on paper at the time, and one I'm okay with that. But also I think I like this version more. You know, like I had a fantasized version going into, you know, my mid to late twenties of what I thought my life was supposed to be, or what I wanted it to be, and the reality that came with actually being here turned out to be much better than what I could have ever imagined for myself. So I want to share a quote with you. It's from the book of tea, which is very fitting for the show. The art of life lies in a constant readjustment to our surroundings. That quote is so true. It resonates with me as someone in the 30 plus club that I think if if I had read that in my twenties, I wouldn't have been able to digest that for myself, I wouldn't have been able to fully let it speak to me in that way, because this is totally true.

TJ: 10:53

Life can be a bunch of twist and turns. You know you can be on the top one day and on the bottom the next, depending on what your lifestyle is like and what industry you're working in. You know things can change at the drop of a dime that you, truthfully, have no control over. I think that's the beauty in change is that the change that comes to you unexpectedly allows you to pivot in such a way. You then begin to question what is it that I need versus what is it that I want, and I think that's a valuable lesson for us to learn that sometimes in life you know what you want is not necessarily an alignment with what you actually need. And that's OK in my opinion.

TJ: 11:45

You know, I think ultimately, what you need might actually be more rewarding than what you initially thought you wanted. You might have wanted to live in this particular neighborhood or this specific house or live in this specific city. But what you actually need is to remain around family, or to, or the reverse of that. You actually need to be away from family so that you can learn more about yourself and enter that phase of self discovery and self improvement and really get a deeper understanding of yourself so that you can go out into the world and be your most authentic version of yourself. So I just want to offer up to you To embrace the change that comes your way.

TJ: 12:33

Whether you are entering a new phase of life or navigating the unexpected twist and turns, remember that life is beautiful and, truthfully, I think the most enjoyable moments revolve around change and, on that note, have a good day, don't be afraid of that change and I'll see you next week. And that's our show. Friends, thanks for joining us on Tea with TJ. Please rate, review and subscribe, and you can find us on Instagram at tea with TJ podcast. And, as always, stay kind, keep sitting and remember we're here and we'll see you next time.