Heartwarming Tales of Resilience and Creativity: Wrapping Up with TJ

Have you ever wondered what truly fuels creativity and resilience in the face of life's challenges? Join me, TJ, as we wrap up an enlightening season two of Tea with TJ with heartfelt reflections and transformative moments from our incredible guests. From the unexpected joy found on a farm to the profound revelations brought on by the pandemic, this episode is a tapestry of inspiration and hope. We'll share personal stories of overcoming rejection and finding healing through creative expression, all while highlighting the importance of being a role model for younger generations and the transformative power of shared happiness.

In this special finale, we dive deep into the emotional impact of familial relationships and the alignment inherent in storytelling. You'll hear about the resilience that laughter and gratitude can bring, and how self-assurance can be a comforting companion through life's ups and downs. We also explore the fears that keep us up at night and the inspiration we draw from our achievements, both personal and professional. Lastly, we underscore the vital importance of representation and visibility, celebrating the love we find within ourselves and the drive to uplift underrepresented communities. Don't miss this heartwarming conclusion to season two and get ready for even more inspiring stories in season three.

Transcript

TJ: 0:15

Hey friends, it's TJ, and you're listening to Tea with TJ, where our love for tea, conversation and self-improvement intersect. So let's take a deeper dive into my cup and let's have a chat. Hey friends, it's TJ. In honor of this amazing journey that has been Tea with TJ, and to close out season two, which has been a very eye-opening and inspiring season for myself, I thought I'd share some of my favorite moments from our guests from season two. At the end of each episode, I ask guests what I've coined as the last three, three questions unrelated to the topic of their individual episode, to give them a chance to share their own perspective and insight from their lived experiences. So, with that, enjoy this special episode of Tea with TJ and I'll see you in season three. So what inspires you the most?

Morgan : 1:18

The first thing that came to my mind was like people coming after me, people coming after me in whatever capacity that is like, whether it's like a child or me, and like a child that came from me, or like a mentor or somebody who's wants to do what I'm doing, or you know just, I just think that positive influences and role models are so important and if I can do something to give somebody a little hope, you know I want to, I want to do. I got 17,000 nieces and nephews god, god, children and you know if I can just like this is a little vain, but it it, all it. It makes my heart smile, like when I talk to my little cousins or I talk to my nieces and nephews and they say, morgan, you still in, you still in new york, and I'm like, yeah, and he like you, you doing a show, when is your show? You doing a show? Or I'll be like, yeah, because it's, it's cute, you know, because I remember, you know like seeing people when I was younger and be like, wow, that's cool. You know like yeah, so yeah, little little people I love that

TJ: 2:38

or big people you know, where specifically, and this could be metaphorically or a physical place, but where do you find the most joy?

Morgan : 2:50

whoa from people who also want to be joyful I feel, like in spaces where people also want to experience joy. That's where the most joy happens, naturally, you know, because I could say like oh, you know around people that I love or people who love me, but sometimes they suck, you know.

Morgan : 3:17

And you know because sometimes I suck, you know, depending on what's going on. You know I might be in a funk, you know. But yeah, and in a good plate of food, and you mix them two together. Yeah, oh, maybe with a little champagne yeah, yeah that's a joyful combination.

TJ: 3:37

It is it is if you were not performing, what would you be doing?

Morgan : 3:44

something with food. Okay, like whether that's like I said I want to. I see myself on a farm, like I, that that's a whole, it's I, it's I. Got a whole like plan in my head, something, something dealing with food. I see, I see myself on a farm. I need to like whether it's like gathering vegetables, harvesting and not even vegetables, like all kinds of food.

Morgan : 4:13

Um, because it's people say all the time food is medicine and it sounds like very hippie, dr Seabee-ish, you know, but like it's not a lie, you know, and I feel like if people knew that Lil Debbie cakes number one don't taste good and number two are literally plastic and a real cinnamon bun is not that hard to make and, yes, it got some sugar in it's, got some bread in it, but it's so much better for you than you eating that, that stuff out of a package. And you eating three cinnamon bun, three little debbie cakes, in one sitting is worse for you than if you made a whole tray of homemade cinnamon buns and ate all of them. You know, like I don't know, I just, oh Jesus, some something to, something to do with food. I, I used to me and my mama used to. Um, I really want a sandwich shop or wanted one. I don't really know what that is about anymore, but I see myself in a kitchen and in a farm Farm.

Morgan : 5:33

To kitchen it also goes with, like, the body. You know what I was talking about. I just, I really think that's important. And then food goes hand in hand, you know. And then food goes hand in hand, you know, um, very, very, very, very passionate about the body and how it relates to food and how, if we are aware of what's going on in our body, how we can fix it and we can heal it at home.

TJ: 6:02

Yeah, you know if you could tell your younger self anything, what would you tell?

Justin: 6:08

you're gonna make me cry. Um, oh god. Let's see if I can tell little justin it's going to be okay, it's going to work out.

TJ: 6:20

Yes I love that. Yes, um, what would you say was the pivotal moment for you as an artist?

Justin: 6:28

the pandemic? Yeah, I know it's, it's. Everyone was just like it was the word. It was the best time my life. Yeah, yes, why. It just allowed me to tap into more creative things, like I had allowed so many things that I do, just to lie dormant or become like a survival thing, and didn't find the joy in it. I just saw the money that came out of it and now I'm just like I find joy in doing this, thanks pandemic.

TJ: 6:51

I love that. Yeah, I feel like I discovered a lot during the pandemic, um, and then finally, okay, what would you say has been the most healing experience as a creative?

Justin: 7:04

the most healing experience as a creative I I think the rejection I know, I know, I know it's like counter, you know whatever, but like the rejection allowed me to go. It kind of punched me and it was just like why are you doing this? Get back in the game. But like, learn the lesson and don't do it again. And so the rejection kind of helped shape me to who I am.

TJ: 7:31

What do you value the most?

Ashley : 7:33

What do I value the most? Oh, the first thing that came to mind was compassion.

TJ: 7:41

Hmm, yes, absolutely.

Ashley : 7:45

It's a hard world out there and if you don't feel for other people, you're going to have a really lonely, really hard time. Yeah, yeah.

TJ: 7:55

I love that.

Ashley : 7:55

Yeah, okay.

TJ: 8:00

Where do you feel your heart lives?

Ashley : 8:06

TJ, you and these golly. Where do I feel my heart lives, tj, you and these golly. Where do I feel my heart lives? Where it is nurtured.

TJ: 8:18

I love that that's a good answer.

Ashley : 8:25

That changes. I mean, and there are times where the place that your heart was, that it was nurtured, sometimes you take a step away from that because the flavors changed for a minute yeah and you go do something else, find somewhere else where your heart is nurtured, and then you can. You can always go back you can always go back exactly but um, yeah, I think I think which also ties into compassion like you have really have to accept um give and accept love freely because that's the most important thing to me?

TJ: 9:03

I agree, I agree. And then final question who inspires you the most important thing to me? I agree, I agree. And then final question who inspires you the most?

Ashley : 9:13

These very, very deep questions, I'm probably going to say my mom, she is just a wonderful woman. I think moms in general are like yeah are gorgeous, profound creatures who are again full of compassion, full of love, um, truly are nurturing people, um, and I think being able to give people safety, to be able to be vulnerable like that is a gift that my mom gave me a long time ago where do you find yourself most aligned?

Jaxin: 9:56

where do I find myself most aligned? I think it's, I wanted to say, performing, and, yes, on stage, but not just the stage, stage, but teaching, speaking, right, I feel like when I am, um, like using my abilities as a storyteller I guess that's really what it comes down to is when I feel most aligned. So, be that in a play, doing stand-up, or teaching a class, you know um, I think delivering a story and using all of my abilities to help connect people to something right because that's essentially what that is right, um is when I feel at most in alignment nice, um what opens your heart the most?

Jaxin: 10:47

laughter. I love to laugh. Yeah, making me laugh is like, yeah, I mean, it literally opens my heart, you know. And also, I think being able to share a sense of humor with someone is, you know, usually symbolic of a real deep connection.

TJ: 11:04

So laughter is is. I mean I know it's so cliche but when people say laughter is medicine, but it truly is. It can change lives and minds and hearts.

Jaxin: 11:15

My favorite thing is those moments when you're in tears with your friends, you know, when you're just laughing so hard that you're crying and your stomach hurts, like those are the most beautiful moments to me.

TJ: 11:27

Yeah. And then final question what would you want your last words to be?

Jaxin: 11:33

Thank you.

TJ: 11:36

Oh, that's beautiful. That's beautiful. Love that. Oh my gosh, that's amazing.

Jaxin: 11:43

Yeah, I think happiness is the ultimate expression, or I say gratitude is the ultimate expression of happiness, and I really want to be happy, I want to die happy and I think, you know, being filled with gratitude is when I feel the happiest.

TJ: 11:58

What are you most grateful for?

Bernard : 12:08

I am most grateful for all the things that I thought were set to destroy me, but were actually lessons that helped me become the person that I am today. That's what I'm most grateful for. I wasn't always, but today I'm grateful for that. Oh my God, that's what I'm most grateful for. I wasn't always, but today I'm grateful for that.

TJ: 12:25

Oh my God, that's beautiful. Yeah, if you were not an opera singer or a performer, what would you be doing?

Bernard : 12:38

Well, I would either be a mechanic engineer, mechanical engineer, or an automotive engineer, because I love cars, I love designing. But if that hadn't worked out, I may be a medical professional, probably a nurse.

TJ: 12:53

I was going to say you give very much acts of service. I get that, I completely get that. And then last question what brings you the most peace?

Bernard : 13:05

what brings me the most peace is knowing, having a deep knowing that I'm gonna be okay, that no matter what happens, no matter who comes or goes, I can take care of myself and that I am going to be okay.

TJ: 13:23

What are you afraid of the most?

Derric : 13:26

Ooh, wow, um, that's that's actually going to get kind of deep here and I that's gonna. I hope I don't scare anybody, but, um, what I'm afraid of the most is my grandparents passing and me not being able to, you know, show up um, and that fear has kind of already recently come true. Um, one of my grandparents just recently passed, so it's been interesting dealing with you know that and everything with that.

TJ: 14:02

But yeah, just to be honest I appreciate it, I love it, um what inspires you the most?

Derric : 14:15

oh, my brother, he's my biggest inspiration. He's an actor, he's a rapper producer, he has a master's he's you know he's, he's doing it and he's definitely my biggest inspiration for continuing to strive and and not let anything hold me back. And, you know, just take the, take the life by the horns and, you know, get it done. So.

TJ: 14:45

And then final question where do you feel the most seen?

Derric : 14:51

Oh wow, Um, where do I feel the most seen? That's. That's a really interesting question. When I look in the mirror Now, that's when I feel the most seen, that's beautiful.

TJ: 15:21

Where do you find the most love? Oh?

Chethan: 15:27

oh, my god, you know I want to say myself. That's right if that's like. I don't want to sound so cliche, but I've worked. I've worked pretty hard myself the last couple years and I have to say, like I don't have a partner, I'm single, so it's been a lot of myself. And then I luckily have these amazing nieces and nephews that I see at least a couple times a month and they are so much joy and I just like look at them and I'm so in love and like if I need to look at a little recharge, I go up there and then like they scream and run and give you a hug and like they're so excited to see you and that just kind of reminds you that you are loved in all spaces. You know that you're good in.

Chethan: 16:08

And so yeah, that's where I think.

TJ: 16:11

What inspires you the most? What?

Chethan: 16:13

inspires me the most, this kind of weird need to want to shift the perspective on queer indian entertainers. You know, like there's so many indian people in this world and there's like even less representation of us, especially here, and that kind of fuels me, that kind of inspires me. It's like I want to f up the fucking baseline on this, like why aren't we everywhere, like, why aren't we in fashion? Why aren't we, like you know, like more of this, like more queer indian drag, more queer indian spaces and like performances and all that like so that in the back of my mind is like I'm trying to create those things yeah, yeah.

TJ: 17:07

We need way more representation in this world. I'm like this world is so much more diverse than we like to pretend that it isn't. And then final question where would you be if you were not in new york city?

Chethan: 17:26

so I tried la for five years and I, you know, I went because like, where else would you go as a performer? And plus, like sunshine and gorgeous weather. But something in me like if I wasn't here london I've never been, but I don't know why for like years in like London. Could London be a good spot, like I don't know? Something is very enticing about London what brings you the most joy.

Jai: 17:55

I'm gonna get all deep now, cause, cause I have I've been dreaming about I didn't call it a podcast when I dreamt it, but I've been dreaming about doing this for years at least um, maybe 15, maybe longer but I've been dreaming about talking to us, about us, for since. I can think of anything that I've wanted to do and the idea that I get to do this this is what you black gay people, people who love black gay people More often than not from behind this mic, but I get to hear our stories from every corner of the world. That brings me joy, like I get. I remember the first time I got a dm from somebody who said thank god, I found you and I was like, who me like?

Jai: 19:18

At the time I didn't know anything about metrics and numbers and reach, all of that. I just, you know, recorded something, shared it on my Facebook timeline and moved on and went back to work, and so to get a DM on Instagram, when I didn't even have my Instagram connected to the podcast, especially. But the fact that this person sought me out to say thank you and for every thank you that I get that they don't know what they did for me minutes with me on Wednesdays, or an hour on Thursday night. However, they engage with us has created a way for me to live out my dream. So every DM, every share, every crazy comment, every one of them, I count them all joy.

TJ: 20:20

I love that. That was beautiful. What are you most proud of?

Jai: 20:29

Um, most proud of my body, mm, hmm, I, when I was growing up, I was like I was 130 pounds when I graduated high school and I was 137 when I graduated college. So the fact that I've gone from there to this is what I am. I mean, in addition to it's the, it's the more superficial thing that I'm proud of, but I celebrate it every day, and I mean full disclosure, like it. Had my body not changed, had I not worked on it, I wouldn't have leaned into nudism the way I have, I would not have been as comfortable in leather, I would not have discovered things that I'm genuinely interested in and derive pleasure from, had I not walked myself through a transformation. So my experience as a Black gay man has been enriched by the fact that I got thicker, and having gotten thick helped me understand and appreciate and respect and honor the thickness of other people, like when I was skinny.

Jai: 21:45

I used to like skinny boys and I didn't. And if you had, you know, if you were 200 pounds, then hell no. But now I'm 220. And so I can. I can appreciate someone who is skinny. I can appreciate someone who's a lot thicker than me. I can appreciate the big girls. I can appreciate all different kinds of bodies because my body has undergone a transformation. Now it is one that I have controlled and contributed to, but I've changed, my options changed, but also my perspective changed.

TJ: 22:18

Final question when do you find beauty in the world In the eyes of black men.

Jai: 22:30

I think that there's a poem that was on I think it was the Image Awards one year, and one of the lines said black is hard to do. The image awards one year, and one of the lines said black is hard to do, um, and it is like lesser human beings could not walk in the shoes of black men. Yeah, and to know everything that black men could could go through like my life has been soft compared to a lot of the experiences that I hear from others, but to know all the trauma and the abuse and the insult and the offense that we can and do endure every day, knowing that and you can still find the light, you can still find the light, you can still find the joy, I think that is absolutely beautiful.

TJ: 23:35

Thank you so much for listening to this very special episode of Tea with TJ. It's been an amazing journey and I never in a million years thought that I would become a podcast host or a podcaster, so it means the world to me that you are actively listening to the show. We are going to start season three in August, so make sure you subscribe to the show so you don't miss any episodes. We have some fun guests coming up. And just a reminder, if you do not follow us on Instagram or TikTok or YouTube, we're on all of those platforms at Tea with TJ podcast and I'd love to hear from you. Please reach out, comment on some of the videos, screenshot your favorite episode and tag me in it.

TJ: 24:19

I'd love to hear from you and if you really enjoy the show or have a favorite episode, share it with someone that you think might enjoy it as well. We'd love to get the podcast out into more ears. So with that, I will see you in the new season starting in August and that's our show. Friends, thanks for joining us on Tea with TJ. Please rate, review and subscribe. Thanks for joining us on Tea with TJ. Please rate, review and subscribe, and you can find us on Instagram at Tea with TJ Podcast and, as always, stay kind, keep sipping and remember we're here, so we might as well do it. Thank you.