Fit & Frugal Podcast

Empowering Fitness: Lisa Bowden on Achieving Body Positivity, Mental Wellness & Boosting Confidence

October 25, 2023 Tawni Nguyen, Lisa Bowden Season 1 Episode 15
Empowering Fitness: Lisa Bowden on Achieving Body Positivity, Mental Wellness & Boosting Confidence
Fit & Frugal Podcast
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Fit & Frugal Podcast
Empowering Fitness: Lisa Bowden on Achieving Body Positivity, Mental Wellness & Boosting Confidence
Oct 25, 2023 Season 1 Episode 15
Tawni Nguyen, Lisa Bowden

Hey Fit & Frugal Tribe!

Struggling with self-love and body image? Is weight loss the only measure of fitness success?

I'm super excited to share this episode with Lisa Bowden, an incredible online fitness coach from South Carolina. Lisa's not just any fitness coach; she's a trailblazer in the industry, advocating for body positivity and empowering women to embrace their strength and confidence.

Join us as Lisa dives into her journey and mission in the fitness world. She's challenging the norms, speaking out against the problematic focus on weight loss and a single body type. Lisa's all about celebrating individual fitness paths and ensuring overall health and well-being take center stage, not just the numbers on a scale.

We get real about the struggles of self-love, the art of setting healthy boundaries, and why personal happiness should always be a priority. Plus, Lisa opens up about the crucial role of mental health in our lives, encouraging everyone to embrace therapy and break down the stigmas around seeking help.

With over a decade in the fitness industry and a bundle of certifications under her belt, Lisa is a powerhouse of knowledge and inspiration. Her journey hasn't been easy – battling negative body image and societal pressures in her early 20s, she found liberation through bodybuilding and a new definition of health and beauty. Now, she's committed to helping others find their confidence and freedom, focusing on mindset and personal growth over scale victories.

Her clients' transformations go beyond physical changes; they're conquering new life challenges, from earning degrees to starting businesses, all thanks to the belief in themselves that Lisa helped ignite.

So, whether you're looking to start your fitness journey, struggling with body image, or just in need of some honest, uplifting conversation, this episode with Lisa is a must-listen. Let's dive into this empowering discussion and start redefining what fitness and health really mean!

Key Takeaways:
Weight is just a number and doesn't define your worth or health.
Fitness journeys should be individualized and focused on overall well-being.
Authenticity and vulnerability on social media can foster genuine connections.
Self-love requires setting boundaries and prioritizing personal happiness.
Mental health is an important aspect of overall well-being and should be destigmatized.

Watch this episode instead w/ full timestamp💚

Connect with Lisa Bowden on Instagram 

Thank you for spending your time with us!

Subscribe to my Youtube & Join our tribe💜

Follow me (it's not weird):
Instagram:
@fitnfrugalpod or @tawnisaurus
Facebook | Tiktok | LinkedIn

Please let me know your favorite moments:
Like, Subscribe & Review over on Apple or Spotify

Show Notes Transcript

Hey Fit & Frugal Tribe!

Struggling with self-love and body image? Is weight loss the only measure of fitness success?

I'm super excited to share this episode with Lisa Bowden, an incredible online fitness coach from South Carolina. Lisa's not just any fitness coach; she's a trailblazer in the industry, advocating for body positivity and empowering women to embrace their strength and confidence.

Join us as Lisa dives into her journey and mission in the fitness world. She's challenging the norms, speaking out against the problematic focus on weight loss and a single body type. Lisa's all about celebrating individual fitness paths and ensuring overall health and well-being take center stage, not just the numbers on a scale.

We get real about the struggles of self-love, the art of setting healthy boundaries, and why personal happiness should always be a priority. Plus, Lisa opens up about the crucial role of mental health in our lives, encouraging everyone to embrace therapy and break down the stigmas around seeking help.

With over a decade in the fitness industry and a bundle of certifications under her belt, Lisa is a powerhouse of knowledge and inspiration. Her journey hasn't been easy – battling negative body image and societal pressures in her early 20s, she found liberation through bodybuilding and a new definition of health and beauty. Now, she's committed to helping others find their confidence and freedom, focusing on mindset and personal growth over scale victories.

Her clients' transformations go beyond physical changes; they're conquering new life challenges, from earning degrees to starting businesses, all thanks to the belief in themselves that Lisa helped ignite.

So, whether you're looking to start your fitness journey, struggling with body image, or just in need of some honest, uplifting conversation, this episode with Lisa is a must-listen. Let's dive into this empowering discussion and start redefining what fitness and health really mean!

Key Takeaways:
Weight is just a number and doesn't define your worth or health.
Fitness journeys should be individualized and focused on overall well-being.
Authenticity and vulnerability on social media can foster genuine connections.
Self-love requires setting boundaries and prioritizing personal happiness.
Mental health is an important aspect of overall well-being and should be destigmatized.

Watch this episode instead w/ full timestamp💚

Connect with Lisa Bowden on Instagram 

Thank you for spending your time with us!

Subscribe to my Youtube & Join our tribe💜

Follow me (it's not weird):
Instagram:
@fitnfrugalpod or @tawnisaurus
Facebook | Tiktok | LinkedIn

Please let me know your favorite moments:
Like, Subscribe & Review over on Apple or Spotify

[TRANSCRIPT]

0:00:03 - (Tawni Nguyen): Everyone, welcome back to the Fit and Frugal podcast. I am your host, Tawni Nguyen. So today I have here with me my friend Lisa, all the way from South Carolina.

0:00:12 - (Lisa Bowden): South Carolina, yes.

0:00:15 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. You're going to share a little bit about your platform and what it is that you do.

0:00:19 - (Lisa Bowden): So I am an online fitness coach, have been doing that for a couple years now. Was an in person trainer for about eight years. But I've always been very much about body positivity, women building their confidence and just kind of not necessarily agreeing with all of the normal things that are promoted within the fitness industry. There's a lot of things that I don't agree with. So, yeah, that's kind of who I am, I guess.

0:00:43 - (Tawni Nguyen): In a nutshell. In 20 seconds, what are the top three things that you don't agree with that you feel like it's blasted all over social media?

0:00:52 - (Lisa Bowden): I feel like there's a lot of influencers or online trainers that kind of push losing weight as like it'll solve your problems or it's like something you really need to focus on. But I feel like there's so many other important aspects of that where weight is just a number and it really doesn't mean anything. It's so arbitrary, whereas there's so many other components that can really just make you a healthy person. It doesn't necessarily have to be that.

0:01:20 - (Lisa Bowden): Another thing is people constantly pushing supplements and you have to buy this and you have to take this and you have to do these type of workouts to accomplish this. Or it's just very like, this is right and this is wrong. Where fitness, everyone's journey is extremely different. And that's something I work on really hard with my clients, is like, your journey has to fit you and your lifestyle and what feels good for you. Just because Tawny does one thing doesn't mean if I do it, I'm going to get the same results, or maybe it doesn't make me happy.

0:01:52 - (Lisa Bowden): I'd say the last thing that I don't necessarily agree with is just the promotion of your physique or your body or you're supposed to look one specific type of way, particularly in the fitness industry. You see bbls, you see big fake boobs, you see all this stuff, and that's wonderful. And don't get me wrong, those people are beautiful. But I feel like it makes so many women and men feel like that's the standard that they're supposed to accomplish. And there's just always this pressure from media of like, this is the standard of beauty, which I think is baloney. I actually never asked you if I'm allowed to cuss on this podcast.

0:02:28 - (Tawni Nguyen): Fuck, yeah. Okay.

0:02:29 - (Lisa Bowden): I was like, I cuss, but I don't want to mess up your podcast.

0:02:32 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, no, it's for 13 year olds who. No, I completely agree with you, especially on the latter. Like, the very last one of even just the standard of how beauty is portrayed. But it sets unrealistic expectations for women and men. Right. It's because men are like, I only date models. I only date nines and tens. But of what standard of measurement are you comparing that to? Like, Instagram models who are filtered, who are photoshopped, who are surgery.

0:03:00 - (Tawni Nguyen): Surgery, standing in really hot angles or whatever that portrays their best self, their assets or whatever. Right. But in the daytime, do they really look like that? And what hides behind all of that mirroring effects and all of that castration of self? It's like, are they actually a confident woman, the one that shows up on Instagram, or are they filled with self hate, filled with a negative self esteem and all of these things that reflect back on the journey of self worth and self love.

0:03:30 - (Tawni Nguyen): So thanks for sharing that. What do you think? Us being women, and we're both on social media. And sometimes I do feel an insecurity in terms of how am I viewed? How am I seen? Yeah, absolutely. And I've been going on kind of like a healing journey, especially with working with my self esteem for a while. How long did that take you from when you started your fitness journey to fully accept you and your level of self love?

0:04:00 - (Lisa Bowden): It was definitely a process. I would say in my really early 20s in college, like, I was cardio Bunny. I did abs every day. I restricted calories immensely because I felt like I needed to be skinny. And then I graduated college, met someone who was really into bodybuilding and got me into lifting heavy weights. And it just like, the empowerment that came with lifting weights and feeling like I was strong and feeling like I didn't need to be skinny.

0:04:30 - (Lisa Bowden): Like, strong was kind of more important to me at the time that started that whole transformation. And then it's just been a journey since then of just one of my biggest tips is, like, unfollow people on social media that make you feel like. Like, unfollow the Instagram models. Unfollow Jen settler. Like, those people that are so unrealistic, unfollow them. Follow people that make you feel good and do a lot of the work internally of, like, why am I doing these things? Am I only going to the gym to look a specific way because then I think all my problems are going to be solved and answered. Or am I doing this because it makes me feel good? It makes me happy?

0:05:09 - (Lisa Bowden): It's just a positive thing to add to my life because I think the mindset you have as to why you're doing specific things ultimately kind of shows you what relationship you have with that. I've had plenty of clients that are like, I want to lose 50 pounds. And I'm like, why? And they're like, because I felt really good the last time I was this specific weight. And I was like, but did you really? What was your confidence like at that point? And they were like, well, actually, it was probably just as bad as it is now. So I'm like, so it's not the 50 pounds. You got to change the reasoning as to why you're doing something, and if you have a positive reasoning to do it, you're going to a be more successful, you're going to enjoy the process a lot more, and you're going to realize that it's not the end result that you're working towards.

0:05:53 - (Lisa Bowden): The entire journey is what's the best part of it. You're constantly working to improve yourself, and that feels so much better than like, oh, I reached my weight loss goal.

0:06:04 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And I think for a lot of people that set an end goal in terms of a metric that's measurable or quantifiable, I think that's such a macro level of looking at a goal. Right. But they don't realize that it takes a lot of micro goals to actually get there. And for me, falsifying that identity of being skinny, that's just how I lived up until last year, too, because I always wanted to be skinny. It's because of the industry I was in. I was doing marketing. I was bartending. I got paid to pretty much stay skinny or fit a certain dress or look a certain way.

0:06:31 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I completely agree with that because it kind of destroyed my self worth. It's because if I gained weight, like, who am I? Because no one would hire me. I can't get gigs. I can't look a certain way, and it's totally unsustainable. Right up until probably last year that I started lifting, like, truly heavy, that I'm like, okay, so I gained some.

0:06:50 - (Lisa Bowden): Weight, but it's muscle.

0:06:52 - (Tawni Nguyen): It's muscle.

0:06:53 - (Lisa Bowden): Then your body starts recomping and changing, and even though your weights might be heavier or the same, you're going to start looking different.

0:07:00 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And the self worth scale has gotten a lot higher, not just because I can lift more, and then it's more ego driven that, oh, yeah, I'm strong now, I'm a tough bitch. I can do all of these things, but I think it reflects on my relationship with food, with fitness, and especially with relationships with others, because I looked at my circle of friends and I'm like, wow, I only hung out with hot girls and all of these things that always had negative self image about themselves, and they kind of bounced that back onto me. It's because we're always comparing ourselves to other people because they're always, like, judging themselves. I'm like, hey, that was why when I connected with you, I'm like, what is self love?

0:07:37 - (Tawni Nguyen): What is this journey? What is this magical buzzword that everyone kind of, I feel like in the last couple of years, kind of threw it out there, like, love yourself more. Do this, do that. But once I started embodying that journey, I feel like self love and self care isn't really just like taking bubble baths and losing a bunch of weight.

0:07:55 - (Lisa Bowden): So much more than that.

0:07:56 - (Tawni Nguyen): But it's nasty.

0:07:58 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, it can be. Yeah, it's hard because you have to make choices. Like, you have to basically choose what your heart is. Do I want to struggle with this or do I want to struggle with this? Even though this struggle is going to end positively. So I think there's a lot of decisions that have to be made when you're on the self love journey of, like, do I need to cut out people? Do I need to change careers? Do I need to do x, y and z in order to help myself progress and move forward? And that's something that I think I did a lot of.

0:08:31 - (Lisa Bowden): I'm about to be 32, and the amount of close friends that I have now is probably, like, a handful. Whereas I used to put a lot of importance on the amount of friends that I had, and I just realized the only people that I want in my life are going to build me up, make me feel good. I have a lot of friends that are like me now where they're very confident, successful, driven women, and I feel like those type of relationships help me be better. So I think sometimes people have to look at the environment that they're in and it might be hard. You might have to leave that environment, you might have to not be friends with people you've been friends with since middle school, or you might have to just really look at the things that are impacting your day to day. And if it's not helping you grow or be better.

0:09:16 - (Lisa Bowden): It might be something to reevaluate and see if that's something you need in your life.

0:09:20 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, I completely agree. I think I called that process a life audit because everything was a great word for it. Yeah, everything was taking a shit. And I'm like, how do I eliminate certain processes of my life? That wasn't even a system to begin with. It was just a model. It was just kind of like a transaction cycle that I kept myself on just to live in all of these roles that didn't really benefit me because it pleased the people around me. It kind of just amplifies all of the negative patterns and habits that I had that was negatively affecting me. And I didn't realize it, but people around me were so happy.

0:09:55 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I'm kind of glad you brought that up, that you had to remove yourself from certain environment and not really feel guilty about it too.

0:10:00 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, totally. Self love journey is selfish, and that's hard because I am a people pleaser, I'm an empath. I think about everyone else before, or at least I used to think of everyone else before I thought of myself. And I would say the last year or two, I've become extremely selfish with my choices, my time, my energy, because I'm like, you only have one life to live. And I really just want to be happy and do the things I want to do. And as shitty as that sounds, sometimes I had to make other people not happy or do the things that they wanted because I was like, that just doesn't align with what I want or who I want to be.

0:10:38 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And that's emotional maturity. Right there is. Because I think before, I lacked, how would you say this? I didn't allow people to be disappointed in me, is because I was also a people pleaser. Coming from hospitality, like, you want to make sure everyone likes you, loves you, because that's either how you get paid or that's how you get recognition. That's how I got validation. Right? And once I accepted that, I'm like, wow, that's a really shitty place to be. Like, am I happy? Am I comfortable? No, I fucking was not right. I'm like, I'miserable. My life's falling apart, my health is falling apart, and every relationship that reflected that back onto me, not romantically, platonically, but just the whole entire circle kind of started collapsing. And I'm like, are these people going to be truly happy that I'm changing, I'm growing for myself, or that I no longer benefit to them? Right? Like, I don't really have an advantage in terms of what I bring to the table and that I no longer bring value is because they cannot walk all over me anymore. And once I woke up from that delusion or whatever, that was also self inflicted.

0:11:38 - (Tawni Nguyen): I started aligning with people like you who I feel it's very strong in your message that we want to influence and impact other women, to see that light without turning into, like, a narcissism or codependent behavior of, like, I love myself. Fuck you. Fuck you. Right? You can still really be there for other people while having really healthy boundaries for yourself. And that showed up for me in the amount of self respect that I have.

0:12:04 - (Tawni Nguyen): So I want to hear your take on that, of how do you know that you're truly loving yourself and embracing your light? Versus how do you know if you're embracing some kind of narcissistic disorder?

0:12:19 - (Lisa Bowden): I would say just because of. I just honestly feel happy. That's the best way to describe it. I just feel happy. I feel like if it was coming from a place of narcissism, it would be of, like, I need to do this to show everyone else that I can do it or I'm better than everyone else. So I'm going to accomplish x, y, and z. But I think where that differentiates is I just feel happy, and I do genuinely care about other people, and I celebrate other people, and I want them to do amazing things.

0:12:55 - (Lisa Bowden): And I think. I guess, to me, that's where the difference is. It's like, I want everyone to win. It's not like I want to step on anyone to win or be happy. I just want everyone to be happy and feel good and love themselves and do the shit that they want to do. Yeah, I guess that would be the difference.

0:13:11 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. Because I think a lot of that, what I'm hearing is that a lot of people will kind of. Maybe this is coming from an ego perspective. A lot of people kind of blow up your instagram. Like, yeah, I'm happy for you, but sometimes I don't want to put that onto other people's like, are they really?

0:13:28 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah.

0:13:29 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because you're still thinking about yourself, and then you have to realize no one really thinks about you at the end of the day. Right.

0:13:35 - (Lisa Bowden): That's true. Yeah, they're thinking about themselves.

0:13:37 - (Tawni Nguyen): They're thinking about themselves as they should. And I think a lot of that has to come with overcoming a lot of insecurities in term of how you're showing up online and portraying the image that you truly believe in. And it comes with a lot of authenticity and humility, I think, for me, I don't know about you.

0:13:57 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah.

0:13:58 - (Tawni Nguyen): Like, social media was one of the things that I was really afraid of because I'm like, people are going to see what I do. I want to remain private and all of these things, but really, I think it just truly comes down to bearing certain levels of insecurity and being judged and fear of being seen.

0:14:11 - (Lisa Bowden): Absolutely.

0:14:12 - (Tawni Nguyen): It's because I think a lot of the things I removed myself from, it's a lot of friends, like you said, start removing people, then you kind of truly see the layers or all the masks that you were wearing, I guess, for lack of better word, to prove your worth to them so that they stay in your life. But if it wasn't for that person or you falsifying yourself as that person, they wouldn't have been around to begin with because that's the role you had to play.

0:14:37 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. So I really respect that we kind of share that path, and it's like, you go, girl.

0:14:43 - (Lisa Bowden): Right. And I think that's about the community that you built. If you're spreading the message, if that's what you want, those are the type of individuals you're going to attract. So then I think when someone does message you and they're like, I'm so excited for you. I don't know how many messages over the last year that are just like, lisa, you just seem so, like, I love watching you live your best life, and it's so genuine. And I think that's because of the type of community or environment that I've, I don't want to say built because that sounds a little weird, but just the women that I've attracted, I think they're kind of in that same headspace of, like, I want to be happy. I want to celebrate other people.

0:15:20 - (Lisa Bowden): So when I do get those messages, I do believe it's genuine. And if someone sends me one that's not genuine, then that's okay. They took the time out of their day to do something that maybe wasn't as genuine as I'd hope, but that's okay.

0:15:35 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And that comes across a little passive aggressive, too, because you can kind of hear the fake clap sometimes, and it's okay. And I think that's the part of my ego that I had to work to whittle down a little bit, too. It's because before, when you live in that mindset of, like, are they really happy for me? And now I just give the people benefit of the doubt once they reach out to me and I'm like, oh, I'm grateful that you actually spent 3 seconds to type me this message.

0:15:59 - (Tawni Nguyen): Do I have to respond to it how you want me to respond? No, but I will acknowledge that you did send me a nice message. And if it's someone that's not currently in my life, I just wish them well. And I don't really have to pretend like, oh, let's catch up, or whatever, because, you know, that adult saying of one of you would just, oh, let's get lunch and catch up on life, and then you just go back and forth for, like, years until one of you dies.

0:16:24 - (Lisa Bowden): Exactly.

0:16:25 - (Tawni Nguyen): I thought that was really funny because sometimes that comes from a people pleasing thing, too. I'm like, what are they trying to catch up on if we haven't really caught up? And I think that is a really hard moment to self reflect on. It's like, am I answering this out of my ego, or do I truly see this relationship as something where we can pursue something so enriching and grow together into the next chapter of our life without sharing what we've been doing for the last couple of years? Right?

0:16:55 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, exactly. I feel like I'm very big on energy and vibes, and I feel like you can sense when someone's just doing it just because they feel obligated to. Or you ran into them somewhere and they're like, hey, let's catch up. And you're like, yeah, no, exactly. Those conversations I just keep short and sweet. Like, hey, it was great to see you. Hope you're doing well and leave it at that. Because for me, fakeness.

0:17:22 - (Lisa Bowden): I don't even want to say fakeness, but kind of the people pleasing thing, doing it because I feel obligated to. I kind of got over that, where I'm just like, meh, I don't really want to. It wasn't someone that I feel is going to bring a lot of positivity in my life, so I'm not going to put a ton of energy into it.

0:17:38 - (Tawni Nguyen): And, yeah, you can't fake frequency.

0:17:41 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, that's very true.

0:17:43 - (Tawni Nguyen): Right? Like, you can fake the face, you can fake the voice, you can fake the nice messaging or whatever, but once you catch that vibe, you're like, this person and I are not really in alignment. Why am I doing this? Because it kind of lowers you to a different standard that you should be holding for yourself. Not to sound, like, egotistical, but it's like now that we kind of evaluate who should have access to us, in our time.

0:18:05 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I think for me the biggest thing is mental space. Like, if they have the rights to operate in my brain for that 2 hours, what kind of value does it really bring? Right? Are they going to sit there and talk about themselves? Which I'm happy to, but do I care? Yeah. Do I want to know?

0:18:23 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, exactly. I'm not a big, like, I keep to myself a lot just because I don't like drama. I just don't need negativity brought into my life. So I'll listen. If someone needs to talk to me, that's fine. I will always be a support for someone. But like you said, is this something that's going to be worth my time? And if it's not, then I might just say, hey, I'm super busy. I'm not really looking to catch up right now or whatever it is.

0:18:55 - (Lisa Bowden): Kind of setting those boundaries with people, which was a big struggle for me because the whole people pleaser thing, like boundaries, feels like I'm being mean to people. And I had to learn that, no, you're not being mean. You're just kind of controlling the access they have to.

0:19:08 - (Tawni Nguyen): You're being an adult. I just learned that last year. I could not say no if my life fucking depended on it. Yeah, because it's hard.

0:19:17 - (Lisa Bowden): Feel guilty.

0:19:18 - (Tawni Nguyen): You're everything to everyone. Like, you're someone's savior. You're someone's this because you have to be so detail oriented coming from events.

0:19:23 - (Lisa Bowden): It's like, you're so good at this.

0:19:25 - (Tawni Nguyen): So why don't you just do it? Oh, you've done this for x amount of years. You have experience. I'm like, but that's going to take me three days. You're not even paying me. But is the relationship really worth it? Or do you start to build resentment? And that for me was a hard play. It's because I just kind of marinated in that resentment for years and years and years. And I'm like, no wonder no one understands me because I never spoke up for myself, I never stood up for myself and what my needs are and what I wanted.

0:19:51 - (Tawni Nguyen): It's because I lacked the accountability to sit down, be like, hey, you feel like shit because you allow people to treat you like shit because you don't respect yourself, right?

0:19:59 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah.

0:20:00 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I'm like, wow, it sucks to.

0:20:03 - (Lisa Bowden): Call yourself out like that. But it's so needed sometimes too, because you're like, I need to see what I'm doing to myself. And you do build that resentment. You start to resent other people. You resent yourself a little bit. And you're like, why am I like this?

0:20:15 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, you can joke and send memes back and forth, but realistically, people who are on the same vibrations, I feel like, yes, you do need to vent. You do need to. I hate to use it, but it's like emotional dump. Because it is nice when someone's doing worse than you. Because sometimes you feel like that's how you connect. It's like, hey, I'm struggling, you're struggling. Let's just sit here and talk about our struggle for an hour. But totally, how far are you going to let that go? Until both of you are deep in depression together.

0:20:43 - (Tawni Nguyen): And that's the only connection that you really have and that kind of sucks. Instead of like, hey, let's talk it out. Let's see what you're struggling with versus what I'm struggling with. How can we help support each other knowing that you physically can't not do anything for me, vice versa. But it's nice to hold space for someone and I think that's the space in social media that's really hard to amplify is vulnerability, connection, and just the courage to reach out to someone.

0:21:11 - (Tawni Nguyen): It's like, hey, I hope you're doing well. Kind of like what you said, keep it short. I was thinking about you today and then not. I feel like, initiate further, but it's nice to let people know that you're thinking about them.

0:21:23 - (Lisa Bowden): And I think people appreciate that so much more than we realize. Even just complimenting somebody can totally turn someone's day around or be like a pick me up that they needed. So I think instead of feeling like, just thinking things about other people, if I thought about you, yeah, I am going to message you and be like, hey, hope you're having a great day, thought about you, and leave it at that. Doesn't mean we need to meet up or anything, but I just want you to know us thinking about you. Or, hey, I love this that you posted today on your stories. I related to it, anything like that. I feel like there's so much negativity out there that if you can just add a little bit of positivity to someone's day, it can really turn things around for them.

0:22:04 - (Lisa Bowden): But it doesn't mean you have to do more than that. It's just that little tidbit.

0:22:08 - (Tawni Nguyen): Like, the truest to your capacity as a human is just to be kind. And a lot of times people think you have to be generous in terms of like, you have to give someone money, give someone a lot of your time, but you really don't. It takes what, like 3 seconds or 30 seconds to write a message.

0:22:23 - (Lisa Bowden): Absolutely.

0:22:23 - (Tawni Nguyen): And that kindness kind of goes a long way because you don't know just because someone's posting something like flexy and hard on social media of close a deal or whatever, but you don't know that it took them six to eight months of crying and mental health and all of these things in their life to get that social media post right. Because, boom, what immediately gets, I feel like their mind going is like, I'm finally accepted, I'm finally validated for all of these struggles that I put myself through in the last eight months just so I can make this one post.

0:22:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): We hang out flippers. And I feel like that's a lot of times, a lot of their struggle, too, that I've talked to. They're like, yeah, people don't see what we go through until you post the final product and you get all the instant dopamine all at once. And then once it goes away, you don't have a high anymore. And then you start off at the bottom and you crawl that freaking hamster wheel all over again just so you can get to that next thing, to that next thing that finally, truly.

0:23:24 - (Tawni Nguyen): So you feel validated.

0:23:27 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, I definitely think social media, I always tell people, I've in the past, had a really hard time being vulnerable on social media because I've just never been. I don't like people knowing my business. I've always wanted people to see me as, like, this strong person. And I think we have to remind ourselves that social media is a highlight reel. Like, we are literally showing the best of ourselves, of what we're doing, of our life, but no one sees, like you said, the six to eight months it took to get there. When I post a client transformation, people are like, oh, my God, that's amazing. I'm like, yeah, but you didn't see the two years of hard work that she put in to get here.

0:24:10 - (Lisa Bowden): Or like you said earlier, setting up boundaries or being an adult of saying no. People don't understand how long that work might have taken to actually get there. So that's something I feel like I'm starting to see a bit more on social media. Is people posting more of the vulnerability. They're posting the hard stuff. They're posting them crying. Not, I'm going to be a little harsh. Sometimes people post a little too much of themselves crying on social media, but people are starting to post more of the vulnerable stuff, which I think is important because we only see the good, the positives, and we don't see the hard work it took to get there.

0:24:46 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And it's amazing that we have so many social media platforms out there. Let's just say, like, on an average, a person will have five, like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. What's the one? TikTok. And then now threads that I've seen, I'm like, fuck. Just once I finally felt like I'm on social media. There's a new motherfucking shit that comes out that I have to learn now.

0:25:06 - (Lisa Bowden): I know. And I did download thread. I'm not even going to lie. And I was so excited because I was like, oh, my God. I feel like this can be an app where it's not business. Not everyone's like, posting to sell their shit. It can be just everyone being sarcastic, witty and fun. And then, of course, that day I start seeing people posting their fitness stuff and I just was like, dang it. I really wanted an app that would just be fun where it wasn't like a business and it wasn't like all this stuff. But anyways, that's a different topic.

0:25:38 - (Tawni Nguyen): I completely agree with you because let's just say bringing back to the five platforms, right, there's so much of your attention that you're diluting. Yeah. You're maybe sharing the same posts across the platforms, but how much of your mental attention is directed towards each platform because you have different people that you connect with? And I feel like as a way to connect with more people, people become actually more distant and more disconnected through using the platforms.

0:26:03 - (Lisa Bowden): I agree. And I feel like people share a small piece of themselves on a lot of the platforms. They don't necessarily share. I can see someone post every day and watch their stories, but I feel like if I were to meet them in person, they could be significantly different than what they are on their social media because you're putting on a show, everyone talks about curated feeds and all this stuff. So I feel like I'm super sarcastic. And so threads, I was like, sweet. I can make jokes. I can just do the things that I can't necessarily post. Not can't post on Instagram, but don't, because it's not benefiting anybody. It's not educational, it's not business or well received.

0:26:51 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:26:51 - (Lisa Bowden): Where I'm like, thread, I could post whatever I want. Yeah, I knew that wasn't going to last very long. Yeah.

0:26:56 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because they're like, you have to maintain personal brand. You have to do all of these things that like you said, right? That puts other people's opinion on such a high pedestal that you're always chasing for their validation by what you post about your life, because you're giving them actually the power to choose you instead of just, like, here I am. I hate to say, like, love it or leave it or whatever, but it's kind of just got to be that way. And I feel like a lot of the energy that's been attracted between us, it's because we're very satirical.

0:27:31 - (Tawni Nguyen): I love roasting people. So if I can't really roast you, and if I'm all sweet and innocent with you, we're probably not friends, and I'm just giving you the 20th superficial outer layer of what a nice person would do. Right? But I think a lot of people. How do you say this? There's a lot of nice people, right?

0:27:50 - (Lisa Bowden): Totally. I'm super nice. I am. But the people closest to me know that I'm sassy and I can be an asshole. And I do like to crack jokes on people, and that's just how I show love. But I can't do that on a platform that's about body positivity and self love and make the jokes that I would make to some of my best friends. Yeah, I just can't. It wouldn't be on brand, even though that's who I am. But it's also like, I know what I'm saying is never coming from a negative place. Yeah, it's coming from a place of love, but you can't portray that. I feel like in social, you know, you only have, what, two to 5 seconds of someone's attention, so you can't say, like, crack a joke and then be like, I'm joking. This is not me.

0:28:36 - (Tawni Nguyen): Here's a real paragraph, right?

0:28:38 - (Lisa Bowden): They're going to just see that one clip, and then they're going to be like, that's not what Lisa's about. I'm so confused now. Maybe Lisa isn't nice. Maybe Lisa doesn't care about. So.

0:28:49 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, contextually speaking, I think that's where social media kind of washes out who you are in terms of, it's so one dimensional. Yeah. People say be multidimensional, be this, be that. Of course that's who we are as spiritual beings. But I do agree that good girl syndrome thing washes all over everyone is because you are only accepted and seen and validated if you are this nice person. But a lot of these nice people, I feel, are struggling because they have to uphold, like, a facade kind of like what you said, right? These performative masks that unless they are a certain way, they will not get clients, they will not get leads, their posts will not be likes because the algorithm hates it. If you're truly yourself and if people don't like your stuff because they don't understand you.

0:29:31 - (Tawni Nguyen): And that's the kind of struggle, right? As content creators, we're like, yes, we want to go viral, but two, at what cost to our authenticity.

0:29:39 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, totally. That's something that I've struggled with a lot is being in the fitness industry. There's just so many things that I don't want to do. This is what fitness influencers or online coaches do. But I'm like, but that doesn't feel aligned with me. But that's what people want. So I have this internal battle with myself a lot of the times where I'm like, I'm going to stay true to myself and who I am, but then there's this pressure of like, but Lisa, every other successful coach is doing this, maybe you should do it. But then I'm like, no, that's not who I am.

0:30:20 - (Lisa Bowden): But I want to make money. This is my business. So it's like this battle I have with myself. And I was talking to someone this morning about this and I was basically like, I need to figure out or basically maybe even build a different type of fitness coaching influencer sort of world where it's like, you can want these things for people, but you don't have to do all the stereotypical things that all these other people are doing that are in the fitness industry because I'm sure you've noticed ice baths are in the new rage right now.

0:30:58 - (Lisa Bowden): They're cool. They can be beneficial if you're doing all the other shit, but if you're not eating healthy and drinking water and working out consistently, there is no benefit from the ice bath. But it's the cool new thing to do. But I'm not going to go on my social media and go take an ice bath because it's cool. Because I feel like that's dumb.

0:31:20 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And that comes down to what is click worthy. Yeah, because if it's a trend that everyone is hopping on, they kind of forget. To me, like, this is a personal opinion. I don't know if people agree with it or not, but if you're lacking the foundational of life, of who you are, which comes down to if you want to get healthier, it's pretty simple, but it's hard for a lot of people. It's just got to eat right and get some kind of movement in. And then actually, for me, I truly believe that your mental health will determine a lot of your physical health.

0:31:53 - (Lisa Bowden): Absolutely.

0:31:54 - (Tawni Nguyen): So that's the platform that I see that there's a lack of, too, because not a lot of people want to talk about mental health. And like, hey, I'm struggling today because a lot of people might see it as attention seeking, and that's true, and it damages your self worth even more. Is that, wow, I'm sharing my moment of vulnerability. Like, hey, I'm depressed today, and you're trying to reach out. Because sometimes people that's like, their last line of hope is to hope that someone can connect with them. That kind of sees truly, like, hey, you're not just having a bad day, you're probably having a bad season of life. And how do you get out of that?

0:32:31 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because people don't see that. I think it's just a lack of vulnerability with themselves, too, because it's actually really hard to connect with another person when they're not at the best self. Right. Because you're sold at a premium to believe that everyone's this happy person on social media and on whatever platform, posting only their successes and posting all of these travels and all of these things. But realistically, no one really sits down and asks you, like, hey, how are you doing? And are you doing okay?

0:33:00 - (Tawni Nguyen): But that's a struggle of internally trying to connect with someone because it's a trust issue thing. Like, why should I let you in my life? You don't know your life is good. But again, social media exactly, can make anything look good.

0:33:13 - (Lisa Bowden): I think about judgment and about people having, I mean, I feel like mental health is getting a lot more accepted, whereas it was very taboo to talk about mental health, but it's vulnerable and you're worried like, someone's going to judge you or use it against you in some way, which is why I've been super open that I've been in therapy since January. It's helped me tremendously. And over the last six months, one of my clients has started therapy.

0:33:41 - (Lisa Bowden): One of my really good friends, via social media has started therapy. And they reached out and they were like, you kind of made me feel like it's not embarrassing to go to therapy. It's really not that big of a deal. It's just another tool for you to use to help you become a better version of yourself. So I think it's cool that people feel like they can now connect over stuff like that. Whereas before, if you went to therapy, people were like, what's wrong with you? Exactly.

0:34:09 - (Lisa Bowden): Why are you in therapy? What's wrong with you? But I look at everything as a tool. You can add this tool to help build value in your life.

0:34:18 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, that is definitely a stigma around therapies. What's wrong with you? That's my least favorite phase when it comes to mental health, is because there's technically nothing wrong with you. And that's what you're there to discover. It's, why am I like this? What are the heavily layers of conditioning that made me this way to this day and age of, like, I'm 33, I'm turning 34 this year. And I went to therapy last year, too. It's because I didn't realize how much shit was buried or I was buried under. And I lacked authenticity and I lacked connection to self is because I was all of these things that I thought I was supposed to be and I never was.

0:34:53 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I don't know what today is. Today is like probably 100 and something days since I stopped drinking. And it's not like a flashy thing. It's not a flashy thing, but I did it because I was mentally, I think, deteriorating because of lack of clarity and brain fog and all of these things that were really affecting my decision making processes and the standards that I was holding for myself.

0:35:16 - (Lisa Bowden): And I think that's huge finding just being so self aware, like, what you just said is, like, you were just so self aware, you realized how this thing was negatively impacting you, and then you made the conscious choice to change it. And I feel like that is such an amazing thing because a lot of people will not have the self awareness or they choose not to have the self awareness in order to make decisions like that. Because when you tell someone, hey, I stopped drinking, or like me personally, I drink maybe once or twice a month, and it's usually only in a social setting.

0:35:50 - (Lisa Bowden): And you tell people that and they're shocked, and it's just like, no, you can make these choices and still be happy. I think people don't understand how negatively some of the things they do actually impact their life because it's so normal now. It is so normal. People will say, I haven't been eating fast food for like two weeks or a month, and it's a miracle. I feel so good and I'm like, I mean, this is how you're supposed to feel. Your body was just so used to feeling like shit all the time that this is what normal actually feels like.

0:36:28 - (Lisa Bowden): And I think people just don't realize that. So to have that self awareness is huge and so cool.

0:36:34 - (Tawni Nguyen): That was a recalibration. I feel what you said. Like, this is normal. I didn't know what normal was. Right. Because you're running and gunning on burnout. You're running and gunning on alcohol and all of these things. And for me, drug and alcohol abuse was something that was normal. It was a normative script of how much you party, how much you can drink.

0:36:54 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah.

0:36:54 - (Tawni Nguyen): Like, bro, I blacked out last weekend, and I have all these crazy stories to tell and all that stuff, but what does it really serve me? Am I just there to entertain them and give them another blackout story, or am I just damaging the rest of my brain cells and everything that I'm worth so that I can feel validated in that moment as the fun person, as the party girl, as this, as that. And that's a really hard moment to reflect on, is now that we can hang out and just be sober.

0:37:20 - (Tawni Nguyen): Some people can't.

0:37:21 - (Lisa Bowden): No.

0:37:21 - (Tawni Nguyen): And that's okay. Yeah. They're like, are you sure? I'm like, I'm comfortable. Are you comfortable with me not drinking?

0:37:28 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, totally. That's something that's so huge, because I will meet with someone and they'll be like, I'm constantly in pain. I'm constantly feeling tired and sluggish, and I just don't feel good. And they think something medically is wrong. And I'm just like, eat healthy, move a little bit, drink some water for the next 30 days, and tell me how you feel. And they're like, I feel amazing. And I'm like, that's what you should feel. Like, you don't need to feel like you're tired and you're hurt and you're in pain and you feel like shit and you can't think and you're not productive.

0:38:04 - (Lisa Bowden): I think that's become a normal just because of the type of lifestyle that a lot of people live. But that doesn't have to be your normal. Your normal can be very different.

0:38:16 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. I call, like, boring as a new normal.

0:38:19 - (Lisa Bowden): Totally.

0:38:19 - (Tawni Nguyen): Right? Yeah.

0:38:20 - (Lisa Bowden): And I love it.

0:38:21 - (Tawni Nguyen): I embrace it. They're like, you're so boring. I'm like, thanks.

0:38:23 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, it feels good.

0:38:25 - (Tawni Nguyen): To be honest, I'm the healthiest I've ever been. I'm the most clearer, like, mentally I've ever been. I still struggle on certain days of sometimes understanding that you have to hold space for yourself and understanding that you and your worth are not attached to the amount of busy you're able to produce.

0:38:41 - (Lisa Bowden): That's a big one.

0:38:41 - (Tawni Nguyen): When you brought up productivity, that was almost like triggering, because I'm like, wow. I used to validate myself for how busy I could be while I was operating on, like, 0%, like, negative 15%, just so I can keep up this productivity life or whatever. But I'm like, what the fuck am I doing? What does this really serve? The purpose or the mission down the road? If I don't have a body to live in? If I'm collapsing at, like 30 years old, 31 years old, I was, like, fainting. I was blacking out.

0:39:08 - (Tawni Nguyen): You know what I'm saying? I shouldn't be like that. That shouldn't be the baseline of how I established my life and just trying to serve others. I can't serve anyone, right? If I'm in a hospital, like, no one's getting shit.

0:39:20 - (Lisa Bowden): That is huge too. The amount of people, they're extremely selfless. So I understand, but moms things, I know neither one of us have kids, but moms I'll meet and they'll be like, but I put my kids first. And I'm like, but think about how much better of a mom or a person, or a person in a relationship, a brother, sister, whatever. Think of how much better you could serve someone else when you feel good, when you feel happy, when you're clear minded, when you feel like you can function, think about how much better you can do things for other people when you feel good.

0:39:56 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, completely agree. Because what's the saying? Like, you can't pour from empty cup. You have to fill yours first. Right? And a lot of that comes back to what you were saying. It is selfish. But how much of that selfishness is just you taking the time back that should have been yours to begin with instead of not even serving others, but just pleasing others is because they lack the accountability to even ask themselves, like, I could probably do this myself. Why am I dependent on this other person to give me something that I can probably do by myself? And that's the culture we live in, is that everyone is naturally burnt out.

0:40:30 - (Tawni Nguyen): Everyone is naturally people pleasing. And the ones that kind of stand out the most are, like, doing their own thing, living their best life, and that's okay. And I think a lot of that maturity kind of comes down to wishing other people well. And healing has been a really big other buzzword that I've kind of brought up is because once I started saying, like, oh, I'm working on finding myself, that's also cringey, like, finding yourself. You don't find yourself.

0:40:59 - (Tawni Nguyen): You're not a fucking quarter stuck in a crack at the couch. Like, you don't find yourself. Like, you create yourself. You have to understand what it is that you need to work on so that you can create a better version of whoever that is. And a lot of people lack that core determination of what is it that I value. How can I share my values with others? And how do I bring value to the table and actually make an impact rather than just being like a servant to others.

0:41:22 - (Tawni Nguyen): Servants and service. I don't think it's the same.

0:41:25 - (Lisa Bowden): Definitely not.

0:41:26 - (Tawni Nguyen): You cannot.

0:41:26 - (Lisa Bowden): But I think people just combine the two. But they're very different.

0:41:30 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:41:31 - (Lisa Bowden): You have to be able to do the things that you need to do. And I do think finding yourself is, like, it's a bit cringey, but it's needed if you don't know where you want to go. And I think a lot of people allow other people to determine that for them. Like, in relationships and things like that, people allow the other person's goals, desires, passions, whatever, to kind of overtake their own. But you have to spend that time by yourself, figuring out what you want out of life, how you want to add value.

0:42:14 - (Lisa Bowden): You can't just live off of someone else's dream.

0:42:17 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. Ouch. Yeah. Kind of like how exactly what you said. When I found myself, I'm like, am I this terrible person that I always thought about myself? Wonderful. Yeah. And that comes with a lot of crying. A lot of things that aren't really normalized. Right. Because now I'm like, dude, I'm a fucking cry baby. I cry pretty much, like, almost every day. Me too.

0:42:43 - (Lisa Bowden): I had therapy on Friday right after I got my lashes done. Oh, God, why did I do this? I'm going to cry and mess up my lashes. So I told my therapist, I was like, I had a little fan next to me. If I cry, I'm just going to pull out my fan because I can't get my lashes wet right now.

0:42:59 - (Tawni Nguyen): It's an economic decision.

0:43:00 - (Lisa Bowden): Exactly. But a poor one on my part. I should have flipped those, right?

0:43:04 - (Tawni Nguyen): Whatever. See, but now you're aware. Yes. It's a lesson. Yeah.

0:43:07 - (Lisa Bowden): I will never do that again.

0:43:08 - (Tawni Nguyen): Exactly. Sometimes through life you're like. Because I think what I'm hearing is that you can switch the narrative, too, instead of saying like, lisa, you stupid little bitch, you shouldn't have done this. But now you're like, now I know not to do that next time.

0:43:20 - (Lisa Bowden): Exactly.

0:43:21 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And that's growth. Like, I'm witnessing it, too. Because now you're like, I'm never going to do that again because I learned it from the last time. Instead of blaming and criticizing yourself. And I think that self criticizing portion of us kind of lives internally and it lives rent free, and it's so hard because you can't get rid of it.

0:43:39 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, it's always going to be there.

0:43:41 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah.

0:43:41 - (Lisa Bowden): There's always this little shadow that's just.

0:43:45 - (Tawni Nguyen): Waiting to say something that's like your voice of reason. That's your internal dialogue of whether you want to use it for good or evil. Wow, I just sound like a comic I just saw. What is it, kick ass the other night?

0:43:59 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah.

0:44:00 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I'm like, why haven't I seen this movie before? It's pretty funny. Just because I never allowed myself the time to even sit down and watch a movie because I've always been so busy, because I pride myself on not having time. But now that I've bought myself time to work on myself and I'm like, I'm going to enjoy more things that people are now criticizing as, like, you're lazy. I'm like, you know what? No, I'm going to sit down. I'm going to watch a movie. I'm going to fucking cry or laugh or whatever, and allow myself, give myself that grace and that kindness. Like, hey, you didn't have this time before, but now you're allowed to be human and allow to sit down and allow to watch a movie, right?

0:44:40 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, no, I've definitely struggled with that. That's something I still struggle with a little bit. Like, I didn't have a tv for the last year. Over a year, I didn't have a tv in my house, and I rarely ever watched tv on my laptop because usually I'd be doing work, like, I'd be doing client programming. So I couldn't do both at the same time. And I very much prided myself in that. And then I was catching up on the Kardashians and their new show, and I started feeling guilty. And then I was talking to a friend about how guilty I felt, and they were like, you are allowed to relax.

0:45:17 - (Lisa Bowden): You do not have to constantly be doing something. And I think there's just this, I don't want to say just for women, but I feel like there's this pressure where if you're an entrepreneur, you got to always be busy, you got to always be doing something for your business. Everything has got to be worth your time in order to make money. And I have a really hard time relaxing. So that's something that I'm trying to work on. I say my gym time is my relaxing time, which it is, but I also need to be able to just relax at home for an hour and not feel like I have to be doing something.

0:45:50 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, no, I joke and say that's my healthy coping mechanism now instead of drinking. No. But again, it comes to us as entrepreneurs, like, attaching ourselves to goals and achievements and sadly, monetary reasons. Right. Because, yeah, there's days where I'm like, yeah, I'm making money, I feel good. I'm successful, and I'm walking around with this big ass dig, like, yeah, and I feel good. The next day where I make no money, I'm like, I'm unemployed. Nobody loves me.

0:46:17 - (Lisa Bowden): Exactly.

0:46:18 - (Tawni Nguyen): And then the next day to work.

0:46:19 - (Lisa Bowden): Harder, which is not necessarily the case. Entrepreneurship is just so up and down.

0:46:24 - (Tawni Nguyen): You don't realize that entrepreneurship, you have like 18 different jobs at any given time of the day, but they're all unpaid until you are paid.

0:46:32 - (Lisa Bowden): Exactly.

0:46:32 - (Tawni Nguyen): And that's painful. But it's also the reason why most people get into it is because they're like, I don't want no boss. I don't want anyone controlling my time. And you realize you're giving all your time to all of these unpaid jobs.

0:46:46 - (Lisa Bowden): Totally.

0:46:47 - (Tawni Nguyen): But for yourself. So how do you talk yourself out of that? You can't. It's like, fuck, I got to be a boss now. I have to tell myself, I have.

0:46:54 - (Lisa Bowden): To actually be accountable to myself and do all these things.

0:46:57 - (Tawni Nguyen): Like, no one's going to tell me if I'm supposed to send an email or not.

0:47:01 - (Lisa Bowden): No, your bank account will tell you. That's what will tell you.

0:47:05 - (Tawni Nguyen): Damn, that's really our boss?

0:47:07 - (Lisa Bowden): Pretty much, yeah.

0:47:09 - (Tawni Nguyen): But that's another funny thing, that as entrepreneurs, as women, we also have secondary and tertiary roles, like keeping the house together. That is also unpaid. But that's what we do to keep our lifestyle together. We have roles in terms of maintenance, self maintenance. That takes time, brand takes time, your lashes takes time. That's an hour or two of your day plus drive time.

0:47:33 - (Lisa Bowden): So I always equate those things to what is valuable to me. So people will be like, how often do you get your lashes done? I'm like, every two to three weeks. They're like, man, I don't know if I could do that for 2 hours every two to three weeks. But I'm like, but the amount of time it saves me on a daily basis is well worth the investment in those 2 hours. Whereas a housekeeper to me, in my opinion is so worth the money because that's time where I don't have to do specific things. I don't have to spend 3 hours cleaning the house. I can do other things. So I think it's all about the value that people place on things.

0:48:10 - (Lisa Bowden): I recently started doing meal prep service where I'm getting food delivered. To me, one, I'm not a very good cook. I just fucking disclaimer in general, yes. But two, that was something that really, like, it'd be in the middle of my day. I'm trying to eat lunch, I'm trying to do client stuff, I'm trying to do social media stuff. And it was just this huge hindrance in the middle of my day. So I was like, you know what? The money that I spend on meal prepping will come back to me significantly because I will have more time to spend on the things that I need to do.

0:48:45 - (Lisa Bowden): So it's just on the value you place on things. Some people might think it's excessive what I spend on my lashes, and I'm like, that's cool, but it works for me, and it's valuable to me because it makes my life a lot easier.

0:48:56 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, just like you have your lashes. When I look at my finances, and again, I'm all about being fit and frugal. I'm like, where can I stretch out personal spendings to where I'm not giving up too much of what I value? I used to get lashes, but I grew allergic to it. If not, I'd still have it. But for me, my nails is important to me. I could probably stretch my hair and whatever else longer, but sometimes this is even stretching it. That's okay.

0:49:20 - (Tawni Nguyen): You have to come to accept where you're at, in what season of life you're at. And for me, once I started becoming more frugal, instead of the house cleaners every month, I do them every quarter. So I'll still clean in between, and I'll get a deep clean every quarter because it makes the most financial sense. And it saves me the stress of crawling and cleaning the baseboards, cleaning out fridge and the places stuff that you don't really. Yeah, but basic cleaning, it's part of the weekly. I feel like prep to just kind of keep our life together, but no one talks about, like, that's the kind of time value you have to put into building your own lifestyle. Right?

0:49:56 - (Lisa Bowden): And then I look at it this way too, I'm like, I'm not spending money going out all the time and buying liquor and doing all these things. So for me, I'm using that money in more just positive influences in my life. I don't spend money on a lot of other stuff, but those are just, like, the few things that bring me a lot of just support that I feel like I need. So I definitely think there's areas. I probably wouldn't get my lashes done if it didn't fucking take me, like, an hour to try to put on strip lashes.

0:50:34 - (Lisa Bowden): It is the most frustrating thing of my life. So that'd be a lot cheaper for me, but I'd be pissed off, like, every morning.

0:50:43 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, no. Thanks for your time today. I know that this kind of came. I wouldn't say suddenly, but you know how our friendship just kind of, like, fluctuated over the path of the few years or whatever? But I feel like that's a genuine connection is because no matter when and where we catch up, we're kind of on a similar alignment to the goals that we have. Even though we don't talk every day, I don't believe people should talk every day. That's annoying.

0:51:10 - (Tawni Nguyen): No, friends should talk every day. I agree. Yeah, that's a lot. That's needy.

0:51:14 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah. I say I'm a low maintenance friend. If you reach out to me and you want to talk to me, I'm here for it. And if it's six months down the road, sweet. I'm here for it.

0:51:24 - (Tawni Nguyen): Succulent.

0:51:25 - (Lisa Bowden): Yeah, exactly.

0:51:26 - (Tawni Nguyen): Like, I probably won't die, but check up on me once in a while.

0:51:29 - (Lisa Bowden): Exactly. But I don't need you talking to me every day because you're probably not.

0:51:33 - (Tawni Nguyen): Going to get a response.

0:51:34 - (Lisa Bowden): Right.

0:51:35 - (Tawni Nguyen): Three to five business days, maybe. Exactly.

0:51:38 - (Lisa Bowden): I'm like, if you don't hear from me in a few days, text me again. I probably read it and forgot to respond.

0:51:42 - (Tawni Nguyen): Exactly. Is there any last words you want to leave for? Not even just women or overall? I know your clients are like women, but someone that's working on their healing journey and their self worth journey and their self love journey, especially. What is that one defining change look like for them?

0:51:59 - (Lisa Bowden): I would say the one change that will make the biggest difference in your journey is really working on being self aware and just, like, figuring, like, realizing you don't need to do all the things at once. It's a process. So start with one area of your life that you feel like is substantially impacting you. And then figure out how you can make changes in that part of your life. Because then once that one's better, then you can go to a different part and kind of alter and fix and change that one.

0:52:30 - (Lisa Bowden): And then that's how you kind of continue the process. You're always going to be a work in progress, but don't feel like you have to do all the things. Just feel like, start small and then work your way to bigger things.

0:52:44 - (Tawni Nguyen): Wow. Thank you.

0:52:46 - (Lisa Bowden): Inspirational.

0:52:47 - (Tawni Nguyen): I know. So inspirational. I'm so glad we're friends. Oh, my God. All right, that's it for us today. I hope that you found this message inspiring. Or you can make a decision to change your life today. So start small. Start today. 1% better each day is still better than 0% for the rest of your life. Yeah. So stay fit, stay frugal. You can connect with me on tonosaurus on IG, and, Lisa, I forgot your iG.

0:53:13 - (Lisa Bowden): That's okay. It's The Lisa Bowden.

0:53:15 - (Tawni Nguyen): TheLisaBowden on IG.

0:53:17 - (Lisa Bowden): Peace. 

0:53:21 - (Tawni Nguyen): I'm starting.