Rising Above Adversity: Sir Darren Jacklin's Transformative Path from Struggle to Success

Hey Fit & Frugal Tribe!

Have you ever wondered how someone can turn life's biggest setbacks into stepping stones for monumental success? What's the secret mindset shift that changes everything?
 
I'm super excited for an in-depth  conversation with the remarkable Sir Darren Jacklin,  a man who transformed adversity into opportunity and became a beacon of success and inspiration. Join us for an episode that's sure to ignite your drive and reshape your approach to life's challenges.

It struck me when he said, "Most people are not committed to their commitments. They commit when it's convenient, but they don't commit when it's uncomfortable."

Darren's story is a profound testament to resilience and determination. Growing up with learning difficulties and facing extreme financial struggles, he turned his life around through sheer willpower and relentless pursuit of self-improvement. From his humble beginnings in Swift Current, Saskatchewan, Darren's journey took him from being homeless to becoming a world-renowned corporate trainer and a philanthropic investor.

Today, Darren travels the world, mentoring entrepreneurs and business leaders, teaching them the art of turning obstacles into opportunities. His approach combines integrity, self-awareness, and the power of genuine relationships, guiding others towards unparalleled success.

In this episode, Darren dives into the pivotal moments of his life, including his climb of Mount Kilimanjaro. He shares invaluable lessons on patience, self-confidence, and the importance of being coachable. His insights into the power of nature in providing clarity, fostering genuine connections, and the significance of trusting one's intuition, especially for women, are profound.

Darren's impact extends beyond his professional achievements. He is a PhilanthroInvestor and founder of Elevate to Educate (E2E), dedicated to empowering and educating underprivileged communities.

For anyone aspiring to transform their life, Darren's story is a powerful reminder that with dedication, belief, and the willingness to learn, anything is possible.

Remember, "Behavior never lies. Time will either promote you or time will expose you!"

Don't miss out on this episode, filled with life-changing insights and strategies from Sir Darren Jacklin.

Key Takeaways:
Overcoming Adversity: Darren's journey from financial hardship to success.
Power of Nature: How nature can offer clarity and foster genuine connections.
Importance of Integrity: Building authentic relationships and trust.
Embracing Challenges: Lessons from climbing Mount Kilimanjaro.
Women's Intuition: Trusting and valuing this powerful inner guide.

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Transcript

[TRANSCRIPT]

0:00:00 - (Darren Jacklin): I was five months behind. I paid my rent. And I remember one day my landlord came to break my legs. I had a landlord at one of the places I lived at that he's the guy that he believed in physical, physical assault, like if. And so he's coming down the driveway, and I'm in this one bedroom townhouse apartment. So I actually went into the bathroom, and there's this. Underneath the sink, there's this little cupboard. To this day, I have no idea how I fit in. Recovered. I'm in this mastermind. And the guy told me, if I'm uncomfortable with asking for $10,000 for a day of corporate training, plus travel expenses, to reach down and grab my balls and start squeezing my balls. True story.

0:00:36 - (Darren Jacklin): Okay. I'm thinking, yeah, right? You're going to want me to reach down on the telephone and start grabbing my balls, because it's pain or pleasure. So anyways, two days later, I get a phone call. This guy calls me and goes, I need to speak with Darren. Jacqueline, I want to bring you in to do a quarterly offsite for my executives in the Canadian Rockies. And I want to bring you in. How much for a day of corporate training?

0:00:56 - (Darren Jacklin): So in my mind, I'm thinking, oh, I know where this is going.

0:01:01 - (Tawni Nguyen): Hey, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Fit and frugal podcast. I am your host, Tawni Nguyen. Today we're actually doing something for the first time, so bare with us here. But we're doing a virtual podcast, and I have here with my friend Darren. He's going to introduce himself, and there he is.

0:01:20 - (Darren Jacklin): Great to see everyone.

0:01:23 - (Tawni Nguyen): Darren, you're in Vancouver right now, right?

0:01:25 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah. Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, is my primary residence where I'm based. Yeah. So I love being here. It's a great city. And I always say, if people have never been to Vancouver, Canada, yet, you want to come out, there's lots of things to see and do here. If you want to be a tourist in the town, you can go on a cruise ship to Alaska. There's the movie industry here from Hollywood. There's hiking, there's outdoor skiing. There's all kinds of stuff. Winter sports, summer sports. Lots of stuff to do here.

0:01:48 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And you're so high energy, and I love the background that you chose because it's very fitting.

0:01:53 - (Darren Jacklin): Vancouver.

0:01:54 - (Tawni Nguyen): When I went, I think I went to Victoria as well. So it's a very different pace of know. I think I drove there from. Yeah, yeah.

0:02:04 - (Darren Jacklin): This is where. This is the base of Mount Seymour behind me. Mount Seymour. And this is where we do our hiking fundraisers all the time for elevate, to educate. We bring people from all over the world and they come and hike and we raise money and build schools around the world for some of the most impoverished people in the world. Yeah.

0:02:17 - (Tawni Nguyen): So to give you guys a little context, when I hit Darren up, I think you were climbing, right? You were in the middle of like a climb.

0:02:25 - (Darren Jacklin): I was going Mount Kilmanjaro in Tanzania, East Africa.

0:02:28 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. So let's talk about that a little bit. Just to start off with something very fitting to your background, like, you love nature, obviously you're very high energy. What was your decision like to start climbing mountains?

0:02:41 - (Darren Jacklin): Great question. I was in Niagara Falls, Ontario, Canada, speaking at a real estate conference for about 1200 people just before Covid-19 really started to take off. And I realized that I was about to go on stage and I had a brand new dress shirt and brand new suit on and I was going to blow my buttons on my suit. And I was trying to figure out in my mind where I was going to stage on stage because they were filming that day and televising on the Internet and also recording because I didn't want to blow my buttons on my shirt and be embarrassed.

0:03:08 - (Darren Jacklin): And I'm thinking, oh my gosh, how did I let my life get to this level? And something I always live by is that in life, time will either promote you or time will expose you. It's just a matter of time. Whether you get promoted, you get exposed. And here I am being exposed because I'm overweight and I'm going to blow my buttons on my dress shirt. And I got back to my hotel room after that event and I called a couple of friends of mine back in Vancouver and I said, listen, when I get back to Vancouver, things need to change in my life. I'm going to start hiking.

0:03:34 - (Darren Jacklin): So I started hiking. I had no hiking boots. I had blue jeans, a shirt and cotton socks and running shoes. And I was so out of shape and so out of breath. And that year I released 43 pounds in weight just from consistently hiking. And I just became addicted to feeling good in my body and my energy. Here I was thinking, if I just go out and hike, I'm going to be completely exhausted and tired when I get back home.

0:04:00 - (Darren Jacklin): Well, completely. The opposite started to happen for me. I started to generate more energy, multiply and expand my energy. So I started documenting this on my social media channels about me going out hiking to inspire myself and to inspire other people to be out in nature and enjoy nature. And take care of your mental health and mental well being. And then people started hitting me up on social media channels saying, hey, can I come out hiking with you? Whether it was in Vancouver, I was in the Okanagan Valley of British Columbia, I was traveling across the United States or internationally, and I started to create this movement over the last couple of years, and from there, it transitioned into what we call elevate to educate e two e now@hikingfundraiser.com.

0:04:36 - (Darren Jacklin): And now it's a global movement where people come out and they hike for a cause. And the money we collect through corporate sponsorship and hiking registrations now build schools for some of the most impoverished children on the planet. So we've already built our first school over in Liberia, West Africa, for over 300 children from preschool to grade six. And we are connected with Link foundation, which is a foundation I help co found, which is an internationally registered foundation in Canada, the United States of America. So people get a tax receipt, and we're federally registered in Canada, United States, and we're just really gaining some huge attraction and attention.

0:05:07 - (Darren Jacklin): We got celebrities coming hiking with us. We've got professional athletes, we've got soccer moms, we've got dads, we've got teenagers. We've got people from all walks of life, all different age groups, and we're having an incredible time doing it.

0:05:19 - (Tawni Nguyen): Oh, wow. Yeah, that would definitely get me out of my house, for sure.

0:05:23 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah, absolutely. We have a lot of people, I have a lot of single women that approach me, and they're like, hey, I'm looking at dating, and I don't really know this guy. Met him online. What do you think? And I said, listen, bring him out hiking. Because behavior never lies. And you get a chance to learn about people's behavior when you're out in nature, because people can't wear the social mask when you're in nature. It balances you. It grounds you.

0:05:45 - (Darren Jacklin): And so your authentic, vulnerable, true self gets expressed when you're out on a hiking trail. And so I always say to people, hey, if you're raising money or starting off a business venture or you're looking for a new job or career or relationship, come out hiking, because you'll meet some great people. Because one of the things I always share with people is that as human beings, all we are is a network of conversations.

0:06:06 - (Darren Jacklin): We're a network of conversations. Anything you want in your life is going to come from having a network of conversations with other people. Because inside of conversations, opportunities get created.

0:06:17 - (Tawni Nguyen): You brought up a couple of things that I really love one is that you don't get to wear your social mask in nature. My partner and I, we camp, we joke about it. We're like, hey, next time we bring a group of investors with us. It's kind of like survival of the fittest. Like, can you actually have the lifestyle that we enjoy? Because if you're going to do business with someone, it's really important to see their authentic self, because anyone, especially going back to dating anyone, can take you to, like, a nice four or five star restaurant, right.

0:06:42 - (Tawni Nguyen): And just get drunk and have a really superficial conversation. And most of the days now, women are going out, they're expecting to be wine and dine. But I'm like, but how far down are you getting to the depth and the level of conversation that you need to actually make the conscious decision of, like, that's the partner that I actually want to build with. Because anyone can go out and get drunk and think this is the one, and fall in love and sleep together and get chemically bonded and repeat the cycle over and over.

0:07:12 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah, absolutely.

0:07:13 - (Tawni Nguyen): Love that part about you just being vulnerable and authentic. And two, it's physical reasons is obvious. And three, being out in nature, actually, I feel like gives people more clarity. And they just don't feel the immense pressure to just keep up this facade that they have to wear all the time. The suit, the tie, the dresses, the makeup, all of that makes such a big difference. Yeah. How do you feel that ties into the way we interact with each other nowadays, that there is an existence of AI? I know you've written a book as well, and you've gone through some of those adversities from your childhood, and how do you see that relate into now that you're out in more nature and you're more open to talk about these kind of adversities?

0:07:55 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah, great question. So I realized that some of my biggest mistakes in my life in business, whether it was hiring someone or having a business partner, was around integrity. Right. Hiring people or becoming partners with people who had very low levels of integrity, selective integrity and no integrity. And when I realized, when you take people on hiking, do they show up on time? Are they prepared? Do they bring water bottles? They have a whistle? Do they have food? Do they have a trip plan?

0:08:19 - (Darren Jacklin): So all these things that you get to learn by watching, observing other people out in a nature environment, which is so important. So I've learned a lot about behavior of people and also people's integrity. Right. Because without integrity, nothing works. And I think also nature's what's the question again, I kind of went off on a little tangent about integrity, but go back to your question.

0:08:42 - (Tawni Nguyen): It's like, how do you feel that affects human nature in terms of the way that we interact with each other? Now, there's AI, there's social media to hide behind, and there's so few people that are willing to come forth more vulnerable and talking about the adversities that they went through and how interact, how does that affect our interactions with each other?

0:09:02 - (Darren Jacklin): Well, I've made a lot of mistakes. I was once homeless. I've been on the streets, I've been on welfare, I've had my car repossessed, I've had an r nine credit rating, which is the worst possible credit score you can get through equifax and Transunion credit. I've had my bank accounts frozen, I've been audited, I've had lawsuits, I've had collections after me, creditors after me all throughout my life by taking different risks and some things that I learned. And I had childhood trauma because when I was a young boy and I was in grade one, I failed grade one public school.

0:09:32 - (Darren Jacklin): And then it was determined by the school system that I was not fit to attend regular public school. So I was put into what we call special education classes from grade one all the way through to grade twelve of public school. When I was seven years of age, I created my first business called Rent a kid. And I would go out and cut grass, shovel snow in the wintertime, and deliver newspapers by knocking on doors in my neighborhood and all throughout my community.

0:09:52 - (Darren Jacklin): Now I'm 51 years of age today. And when I was nine years of age, I had my two best friends in my neighborhood go out with me, knocking on doors, looking at OD jobs, and how we could serve our community and solve problems in our community. To this day, I'm still great friends of those two friends when I was nine years old. In fact, I just talked to both of them just last week by telephone. And so to me, it's all about having and building relationships, authentic, integral, connected relationships. Because a lot of people with social media today, and if you look at a lot of these social media apps and dating apps, it's transactional versus relational.

0:10:26 - (Darren Jacklin): Give you an example, practically look at Facebook or LinkedIn or pick other social media platform. Somebody reaches out, they friend request you, then automatically boom in your inbox here to try to pitch or sell you or recruit you to some opportunity. You're like, I don't even know who you are. You just friend requested me. Now you're trying to pitch and sell me or recruit me to your opportunity, and I don't even know you. It's transactional. It's like a one night stand.

0:10:47 - (Darren Jacklin): So the key thing is getting to know people like people and trust people first and build what we call relationship equity. Relationship equity. And that's why I love with people when they come out hiking with us with e two e is people come out, they get a chance to meet high net worth, ultra high net worth, accredited investors. They get a chance to meet other business owners, self employed people and entrepreneurs, people who have high paying corporate jobs. And people come from all walks of life. But you get a chance to meet a sampling of people from all different industries, all different walks of life, and then you get a chance to say, okay, how do I want to live my life going forward? Who do I want to model?

0:11:20 - (Darren Jacklin): Right? Because success leaves clues. So I always say to people, modeling is so important. And today with social media, there's so many fake people. I'll give you an example. I was at an airport not too long ago and I saw these people flying. They had private jets there. And there was these young people in their early 20s, had borrowed a private jet for a few hours to stand there and change clothes on the ground and take pictures for their Instagram channels.

0:11:43 - (Darren Jacklin): And they'd never even chartered the jet. They've even wrote a check to pay for the jet. They got access to a jet. And it was so interesting to see that. But then they put it on social media. People think, oh my gosh, these people are overnight successes. No, it's thousands of hours of hustle and grind and training and development. I'm 51 today. And yeah, I've achieved a lot of success and financial success and business success, but in my 20s, disastrous. Like, I had a lot of peaks and valleys and adversities and challenges.

0:12:10 - (Darren Jacklin): My when I was 38 years of age, flat broke financially. At 38, I remember making decision one time, I was so disgusted with myself. I said, you know what? Enough is enough. I want to get my money right. I'm tired of this roller coaster of ups and downs and uncertainties and fears and doubts and wonder if I'm going to pay my bills on time each month. And I just got so sick and tired of it. At age 38, I dedicated my life to studying financial freedom. So from age 38 to eight, all throughout my.

0:12:39 - (Darren Jacklin): I'll tell you a quick story. When I became a millionaire in my early forty s, I remember one time calling up one of my mentors in San Francisco I'm like, hey, guess what? I'm now a millionaire. He's like, hey, great. I'm flying up to Vancouver in a few months. Let's go out for sushi and celebrate. But he goes, while I come up, what I want you to do is I want you to go to your accountant, and I want you to get a personal financial net worth statement that's audited and verified by your accountant.

0:13:02 - (Darren Jacklin): I'm like, why do you want me to do that? I'll just bring you my financial net worth statement. I'll just print it off and bring it. He goes, no, I want it verified. I'm thinking, well, it's going to cost you, like, $500 to do that. He goes, I don't care. Get it done, or I'm not going to meet you for dinner. So as I went and got this done with my accountant, I came. I sat down in the sushi restaurant downtown Vancouver with my mentor. He's worth about $25 million at the time.

0:13:22 - (Darren Jacklin): Sit down with this guy, I'm worth 1.3 million. And I sit down with him, and we're in this restaurant that's just full of people, the sushi restaurant. He looks at me and he says to me, he said, darren, congratulations. You're now a millionaire. He shakes my hand and he goes, I got a question to ask you. He said, do you have an ATM card on you? I said, yeah. He goes, there's an ATM across the street over there. He goes, can you walk over there right now to the ATM machine and pull up $1,000 cash, yes or no?

0:13:48 - (Darren Jacklin): I'm like, no. He goes, can you get me $500 in cash, yes or no? I said, no. He goes, can you get me $250 cash? I'm thinking in my head, well, I have an overdraft. And I'm thinking, you know what? I could probably get about $220 in cash, liquid cash. And he looks at me and goes, so you can go get me $220 with cash? And I said, yeah. He stands up in front of the restaurant from all these people in the sushi restaurant, and he goes, ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention, please?

0:14:14 - (Darren Jacklin): My friend here is now a millionaire, but he's freaking broke. He's broke. He's worth $1.3 million on paper, but he's freaking broke. And he can't even buy his and mine's dinner right now. And I just want to crawl underneath the table and hide. I am so embarrassed. And he looks at me and he goes, how do you feel? I said, I freaking want to punch you in the face right now. Run out of this restaurant. He goes, I wanted to embarrass you and make you feel so uncomfortable. You know why, Darren? Why?

0:14:46 - (Darren Jacklin): He said, always remember this. You cannot eat your financial net worth. You can only eat cash flow, and you have no cash flow. You are worth $1.3 million on paper, but you can't even buy our dinner right now because you're flat broke. But you got a good ego, and you want to impress me because you want to look good, and you don't want to look bad. But guess what? You have no monthly recurring cash flow because you don't have a diversified portfolio.

0:15:15 - (Darren Jacklin): And today, I own a lot of real estate. I have multiple revenue streams today because of that guy embarrassing me because I was so proud that I became a millionaire on paper. On paper, but not had cash flow. And there's a lot of people that I've met over the years who are very financially successful on paper and drive fancy cars, live in fancy neighborhoods. I drive a 2015 Honda civic car. People always say, why?

0:15:40 - (Darren Jacklin): Because I'm low profile, high impact, low profile. Because the more visibility, the more exposure you have, the more potential risks and liabilities you create for yourself. People don't realize that on the come up, right? On the come up, people are like, oh, my gosh. And I remember in my 30s, man, I was hustling. I wanted a center of attention. I want to be recognized. I want to be everywhere. And then once you start making success happen, it's all about risk mitigation and asset protection.

0:16:04 - (Darren Jacklin): That's why people live in gated community sometimes. That's why you see people who achieve financial success in professional sports or music or entertainment or in business. All of a sudden, where are they? They're kind of off the radar because they don't want the visibility of the exposure, because it creates potential risks and liabilities.

0:16:19 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah, I like that story. What was that moment like when he embarrassed you? And what has that taught you on an ego level? The saying is like, a bad day for the ego is a good day for the soul. So, how has that experience taught you.

0:16:36 - (Darren Jacklin): To become humbling for your humbling experience? Because in my life, I always wanted to look good, and I never wanted to look bad. And to me, image and ego was very important. Right. Always want to be the center of attention. And it came from childhood trauma of being that kid in special education class that never got the attention, never got people, believe me. I was never good enough, never smart enough, never worthy enough, never amount to much.

0:16:55 - (Darren Jacklin): I was in special ed. Here I am, this young kid, when I'm in school, in special ed, trying to meet girls, right? And I put ten canadian pennies in my left pocket, secretly. So every time I say good morning or good afternoon or hello to a girl, I would simply transfer a penny from my left pocket to my right pocket. Because what I learned is that whatever I lack in skill, I make it up in numbers. And my skill was I was insecure and I lacked confidence in saying hello to people and how I people today, I'm a very self confident person because I've taken a lot of training development, but one of the things I realized was my integrity.

0:17:26 - (Darren Jacklin): You see, I used to have selective integrity. If I wanted something from you, I had high levels of account ability and integrity because I wanted something from you. And then I got realized. I got confronted by one of my mentors one day, and he said, darren, I want to show you a blind spot that you're not aware of. You're a user and you're a taker. Like, what are you talking about? I love people because you're a user and a taker.

0:17:45 - (Darren Jacklin): And what I do every quarter, every 90 days in my calendar, is I do an exercise where I take a few hours by myself, usually out in nature in my backpack, I have a journal, and I sit down and I go through this experiential exercise. And this is an uncomfortable exercise. And I invite everybody watching. Here's the bonus opportunity to do this exercise. It's not comfortable. It's going to be confronting to yourself is sit down and ask yourself this question, where am I self aware in my life?

0:18:12 - (Darren Jacklin): And where am I unaware of my life? And then go to people in your inner circle who love and care about you and your network, your inner circle, and ask people, feedback, constructive, honest, blunt feedback. Because some people are just going to be nice and kind of sugarcoat it and fluff it up. But you want the people who are going to tell you what you need to hear versus what you want to hear. You want those people in your camp who's going to tell you what you need to hear versus want to hear. And they're going to tell you from their perspective, their point of view, where you're self aware and where you're totally unaware, what's your blind spots.

0:18:41 - (Darren Jacklin): And when you start to discover what your blind spots are, your life can totally go in a different direction, because for a lot of us, we're running around thinking that we can. And for me, I'll speak for myself. I thought I could fool other people, that I had selective integrity. I thought I could fool everybody, but in fact, I was fooling myself. And that was a big thing when I realized that without integrity, nothing works.

0:19:01 - (Darren Jacklin): So today in my life, I live by that. My word creates my world. So I live by my calendar, for example. So everything I do goes into my calendar. It's structured into my calendar, and I live by my calendar. And then what I do is I take my iPhone, and every day I take my alarms on my iPhone and I structure alarms to my calendar. So I'm always early and I'm always on time. So I develop a consistency of a pattern because behavior never lies.

0:19:28 - (Darren Jacklin): Because what happens is if you start meeting, this is one thing about hiking. I have people all the time that want to take me out for breakfast and lunch and dinner. I'm like, listen, let's rather go to a restaurant and sit down there for an hour. Let's go hiking and get physical exercise and be in nature and fresh air, and we'll have a collaborative conversation while we're out on a hike. Right? If you're not good at hiking, we'll do a beginner hike. We won't do anything without high elevation or very low elevation.

0:19:48 - (Darren Jacklin): You'd be amazed how many people I've met that don't even text message me, email me, phone, call me and tell me they're not going to show up at the hike that day. And then I had a guy this morning, I'll give you an example. Just a few hours ago, I had a gentleman that was supposed to meet with me the other day, didn't show up to a meeting on a Zoom call, scheduled Zoom call that he set up and he set the calendar invitation to.

0:20:10 - (Darren Jacklin): So he's the one set up and sent me the calendar invitation I accepted. Didn't even show up. There's no show up. I waited on for ten minutes on the zoom link while I was doing other stuff for ten minutes. I terminated the zoom link. Four days after that, he reached out to me, he goes, oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't looking at my calendar, and I didn't realize we had a call today, that day. And he goes, let's get together.

0:20:31 - (Darren Jacklin): So the key thing I look for is, is the person going to step over their integrity, what they gave their word to? And this is something in terms of behavior never lies. You start to watch and observe people's. I watch people's feet, not their lips, because if you look at business, people say, talk is cheap. I think we go a step further. Most people cheap in their talk. I also, and I'll just be transparent with everybody.

0:20:54 - (Darren Jacklin): I made a lot of mistakes in my life, in business. And one of the biggest mistakes I made was not listening and trusting women's intuition. Today, if you look at everything I do within the group of companies and our family foundation, it's all run by women. And I rely heavily. All my team meetings, there's majority of people on my team are women. And I always check in with the women. We have a three step process. I always ask the ladies, ladies, is your intuition right now calm?

0:21:20 - (Darren Jacklin): Step number one, is it calm? Step number two, is it cautious? Or step number three, is it nervous? So calm, cautious, or nervous? So if we're looking at investing in something, are you calm, cautious, or nervous? If we want to hire someone or bring somebody onto our team, are you calm, cautious, or nervous? We want to bring on this corporate sponsor, have somebody involved as a joint venture. Are you calm, cautious, or nervous?

0:21:41 - (Darren Jacklin): And I have them check in with their female intuition, say, I'm calm, green light, cautious, yellow light, nervous, red light. If it's calm, we proceed. If it's cautious, we do more research, more discovery, more due diligence. If it's nervous, red, we run. No involvement.

0:21:58 - (Tawni Nguyen): No. I love this concept. One, because it empowers more women. Because I love how you are trusting women to actually rely on their intuition. Because I don't know about you, Lana, but for the most of my 20s, we're more wired and conditioned to suppress that part of us. Because feelings are bad. You have to make logical decisions. You have to stay on your left brain. But at the same time, you're not really operating from the best part of you, which is your intuition.

0:22:26 - (Tawni Nguyen): Why do you feel that a lot of women lack that self trust or that security to make decisions just based on their intuition, belief in themselves, self.

0:22:36 - (Darren Jacklin): Confidence and belief in themselves and giving themselves risk. Because women are always competing and comparing. You look at all the media, right? You look at all the magazines in the grocery store checkout. They're constantly being compared. There's always a comparison. And so women are always like, am I good enough? Am I worthy enough? There's always a comparison. And men have that internal drive of if they do something, oh, I feel good. I did that. But women constantly have to be validated in terms of appreciation, recognization, because they want to be seen.

0:23:04 - (Darren Jacklin): Look at me. I want to be seen. Am I important? Am I valued? So it's so important. So reassurance is so important, but also the self care. When I take women out. I'll give you an example. I had a woman out with me the other day hiking, and she was on her phone, and I said, can I ask you to put your phone away? You just take the photo. She said, well, I got to do all these things. Listen, she's a real estate agent.

0:23:26 - (Darren Jacklin): She's working on these deals. Real estate. I said, listen, here's what I want you to do. This is what. Come with me. So I take over this tree, and I said, I want you to put your arm around the tree like you're going to hug the tree, and I want you to just hold the tree and close your eyes. She said, what do you want me to do? She just hug the tree like there's a romantic partner, like you're doing a slow dance, and I want you to slow dance right now with the tree and close your eyes.

0:23:44 - (Darren Jacklin): And she goes, this is stupid. I said, okay, just trust the process. Close your eyes and take a deep breath, and exhale. Boom. The tears just started flowing. She just started bawling, started crying, and I just held her there. She just let her there for about probably a good five minutes. And she looks at me, she goes, I feel so the weight just came off my shoulders right now. And I had a woman yesterday called me up who's working on a big deal, and she's like, I got to go into this boardroom present this big business deal for this acquisition she's working on.

0:24:13 - (Darren Jacklin): And I said, here's what I like you to do. I said, I'd like you to dance in your hotel room before you go into the board meeting. She says, what do you mean, dance? She says, I'm going to get all sweaty. I want you to dance, put on your favorite song, and I want you to dance in your hotel room before you go to this boardroom present. She said, why? I said, because radiance, light and energy. Think of this, ladies. Are you attractively. If you walk into a shopping mall and you see a woman who's glowing with her radiance and light and energy, you're going to look, wow, look at her. She's glowing with radiance, light and energy.

0:24:45 - (Darren Jacklin): Men, it's direction, focus, and purpose. So these are things we look at from a marketing perspective. Radiance, light and energy. And for a man, it's direction, focus, and purpose. That man's got direction. He's got focus, and he's got purpose. He's attractive, he's yummy.

0:25:01 - (Tawni Nguyen): Wow, I never thought of it that way. Just because I think lately more energy work has been more mainstream and everyone wants to manifest and everyone wants to come into this quantum field of manifesting. But how would you even say that to someone that, hey, you need to check your energy in a professional setting.

0:25:21 - (Darren Jacklin): Right?

0:25:21 - (Tawni Nguyen): Because I love what you're saying is that part of what I'm hearing is that dancing and just relaxing and self expression is the form of somatic release. Because I feel like a lot of women, I can speak for myself. We hold a lot of trauma, and we hold a lot of identities, and we hold a lot of pressure just within ourselves. And I think that's where the word I think uptight comes from. Because you just feel a woman with a lot of responsibilities and you sense they're under so much pressure that any sudden movement, they're just going to burst.

0:25:53 - (Tawni Nguyen): I don't know if you've met those kind of women.

0:25:54 - (Darren Jacklin): Oh, absolutely.

0:25:55 - (Tawni Nguyen): Position in real estate. Because you have to be on all the time and you're running from masculine.

0:26:00 - (Darren Jacklin): Energy, high masculine energy. Right?

0:26:03 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. And now that there's more talks about being in the feminine and every woman that I've ever talked to, yeah, I can't get into flow state because they're just so wounded and they're operating on high ego, high masculine, wounded feminine energy. So it's not really guided by the divine. So can you speak a little bit more on that? I know that you work with a lot of women, so how do you take that as a man? Like, when you have conversations with women, how do you see an empowered woman and a divine energy woman?

0:26:31 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah. So it's about being, not doing. So a lot of times it's about being, doing and having. So it's about who you're being, your self care. So every morning, whether it's doing affirmations, it's doing some yoga, some pilates, going for a walk, taking your dog for a walk. But it's that self care time of actually structure and schedule into your calendar and make it as a daily habit and daily non negotiable. Right. I always encourage, even the women that work with us and people in my life, is that you'll take that self care time for you, whatever that is for you. If it's reading, if it's journaling, if it's poetry, if it's whatever it is, it's having a bubble bath or an Epsom salt bath, whatever it is, do that self care time for you, but give yourself permission to take that self care time for yourself and do things that enrich your life.

0:27:12 - (Darren Jacklin): Another thing is too, is when it comes to the energy, is a lot of times in business, we look at ROI. What's the return on investment? I always say, what's the roe? What's the return on energy and what's the rol? What's the return on life? Right? So if you're doing something that's not giving you the return on life and the return on energy, or if you're in a relationship right now that doesn't have the return on life, return energy, start to evaluate it, audit it, and say, is this the best and highest good for me?

0:27:39 - (Darren Jacklin): Right? Because our environment is so important about our energy, around our environment and also getting around, for example, ladies getting around, inspiring, empowering environments that are nontoxic environments. Because I'll give you an example. If we go to a food court of a shopping mall and we walk into a food court and we see four women sitting together, primarily, the woman who's getting the most amount of attention is the woman who's got the biggest problem.

0:28:04 - (Darren Jacklin): I see it all the time on the hiking trails, see it all time in my hiking groups, right? The one with the biggest problem is getting the most amount of attention. Then if you've got a handful of women there, three or four women are helping the woman collaborate with her on their problem. And the woman's off to the side saying, oh, my gosh, would you just shut up? I just want to be out here and listen to the birds and look around. And she just keep just talking and talking and talking, right?

0:28:23 - (Darren Jacklin): So the key thing is knowing place and time, but also realizing that it's important to talk about things and express your emotions and your feelings, which is very important, but also situational awareness. I take people nighttime hiking. One of the reasons why I take people nighttime hiking is, number one, is the fear, right? People always ask you, oh, my gosh, is there wild animals out here? Are we going to encounter something? Listen, the fear is real. So feel it in your body's sensations. Honor and celebrate your body's protecting you and keeping you safe. Protection and survival.

0:28:52 - (Darren Jacklin): The fear is real, but the threat is not. There's no physical evidence that nothing's going to eat you or you're not going to die. So when we go nighttime hiking, it's situational awareness. And I always encourage people, when you're out there, do you have the skill of what we call situational awareness? So sometimes women, when they're in their groups and they're talking but they're not aware sometimes of what other people are feeling. It's not the right time and place to be experiencing that.

0:29:18 - (Darren Jacklin): Right. Maybe it should be a private conversation, not a group therapy session where it is, because then you're repelling people from you versus attracting people to you. I've seen some women, for example, in real estate. I've worked with a lot of real estate agents, and a woman will come in, oh, my gosh, I just blew up this deal, and this guy's a jerk. And this and this and this, that going on. And meanwhile, other people around you could be potential clients for you. They could be potential referral partners to you.

0:29:42 - (Darren Jacklin): And maybe rather than voicing it and fireworking it to half a dozen people in this dinner party or this social, public place, you should just talk to one or two people privately, because these people are thinking, oh, my gosh, I don't want to refer anybody. I don't want to deal with people like that. Right, so you want to be sensitive to your environment because people are always watching, always observing you.

0:30:02 - (Darren Jacklin): And so it's very important of time and place and the selection of who you have a conversation with and what you choose to talk about. Yeah, very important.

0:30:11 - (Tawni Nguyen): No, I love your energy. You are just as expressive as I remember seeing you on stage and when we had conversations offline. I can't really envision a time. Can you walk me through what one of your darkest moments is like and how you manage yourself to overcome those obstacles?

0:30:27 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah, great question. Yeah. So I've been really down financially broke. Like, I went several years without paying my taxes. I was five months behind. I paid my rent. And I remember one day my landlord came to break my legs. I had a landlord at one of the places I lived at that he was in the construction trade, and he was one of these guys, that smoker drinker kind of guy, redneck guy. But he's the guy that he believes in physical assault. Like, if he was type of guy, if you said something wrong to him, he'd punch you in the face, no question. Give me assault charge, go to court. I don't care. Call the police. I could care less.

0:31:01 - (Darren Jacklin): Listen, if you're going to call the police, I'm going to make sure that you're going to go by ambulance to the hospital. I'm going to make my assault charge worth it. And so I had this landlord one time, and I was really in a downward spiral financially in my business, doing corporate training. I was struggling, and things were not working out financially for me. And I remember hearing his dodge big diesel truck coming down the driveway, and I'm like, oh, my gosh, this is probably one of the darkest days of my life, thinking, oh, my gosh, this guy, because he's threatened me before, that I'll pay around time, he's going to break my legs with a baseball bat. And he carried a baseball bat in his dodge truck, and he always had a ball and a glove. That way, if the police ever stopped him was like, well, I'm going to the ballpark, because he had a ball and a glove and a baseball bat.

0:31:42 - (Darren Jacklin): So they couldn't prove that he was going to assault me because it wasn't a weapon, because it had a ball and a glove. And he'd always tell me that, oh, you phoned the police on me with a baseball bat door, and they're never going to prove it. So he's coming down the driveway and I'm in this one bedroom townhouse apartment, and I'm thinking I can't get out the window because window is too small. So I actually went into the bathroom and there's this underneath the sink, there's this little cupboard. To this day, I have no idea how I fit in that cupboard.

0:32:09 - (Darren Jacklin): It was so small, but I somehow shrunk my body to fit in the thing. And I was so scared for my life. And I was in there, and he opened up the door of my apartment and he started shouting, where are you? And he flipped up my mattress, he opened up my closet, took all the clothes off the closet, threw him on the floor, went into my little kitchen, looked around me, and he came into the bathroom, ripped open the shower curtain, and I'm certain that he looked down and said, there's no way he could fit in this underneath the sink because if he would have opened, he would have found me. I remember closing my eyes and just saying, do not breathe, do not breathe, do not breathe.

0:32:42 - (Darren Jacklin): And I'm just like, oh, my gosh, my life might come to an end here right now. This might be the end. This might be where I'm going to die. I was so scared. And I realized he ended up leaving and then starts up his truck and took off. And I'm like, oh, my gosh, I can't keep doing this. And that was the thing that I got to get help. I got to get mentors, got to get coaches. Another thing, one time, I'll tell you interesting story.

0:33:08 - (Darren Jacklin): I'm doing corporate training summers. I did corporate training summers all over the world for 25 years. And I used to make 400 cold calls a day, 2000 cold calls a week. And over a five year period, I made over 100,000 cold calls out of the telephone books. Cold calling, right. With a 98% rejection rate. And I'm making $200 a day. And sometimes I'd fly from Vancouver to New York all day to fly from Vancouver, Canada, to New York to go train the next day at company for $200, plus my travel expenses and a $50 day per diem. So $250, and then fly all the way back.

0:33:41 - (Darren Jacklin): So you'd make more money being a greeter at Walmart than I was making, but I was passionate about what I was doing. And one day, I had a friend of mine, he's like, you know, darren, I have this mastermind group. I belong to some really successful entrepreneurs. I'd like to bring you around and give you a guest pass and have you come. And I said to myself, okay, I'll come. But listen, I can't sign up as a member of this mastermind group because I don't have the money, right? So don't pressure me to sign up, because the answer is no, because my credit card is not going to work.

0:34:08 - (Darren Jacklin): I'm maxed out on my credit card. And he's like, no problem. Just come as my guest. So I go there, and there's all these people, and I'm watching them, and I'm putting these people on a pedestal, and I'm putting myself in the pit, and my mindset is like, you're not good enough, not smart enough. And these guys are up there talking. They're coaching each other on business and success and marketing and sales and stuff and joint ventures and mergers and acquisitions in this mastermind group for a few hours, and I'm like, the brokest guy in the group, the dumbest guy in the group, the least experienced guy in the group, but I'm just eager as a sponge to learn.

0:34:39 - (Darren Jacklin): So, anyways, the last hour, they call it a hot seat, and they take one of their guests in this mastermind group, and they go to the front of the room, and they get feedback, construct feedback from the group. Could be on anything. It could be about your relationship, it could be around your finances, could be around hiring somebody, whatever area, topic, and they'll pick you. And if you don't, they'll pick one of the members.

0:34:57 - (Darren Jacklin): So a couple of members said, pick Darren. Jacqueline. I'm like, no, I'm not going. I'm just a guest here. I'm a fly on the wall. Sorry, guys. Listen, you're not going to waste your time and energy on me. There's much more people in the room. We got bigger challenges and problems than me. Listen, don't worry about me. I'm just going to sit and watch and learn and take notes. I'm not getting. No way. I'm not going in front of the. No, no, I'm not doing that.

0:35:16 - (Darren Jacklin): So anyways, they choose me, and this guy goes, okay, Darren, Jacqueline, you're going to come through. I said, listen, I am not coming to the front of the room. And he goes, listen, are you going to keep arguing me for your limitations? Are you going to do what I ask you and get to the front of the room now? I said, no, I'm not coming. No. He goes, stop arguing for your limitations. Come to the front of the room. You're going to have a breakthrough. No.

0:35:36 - (Darren Jacklin): So I get in front of the room, and the guy goes, what do you do for a living? I said, I'm a corporate trainer. Okay, what does that mean? So I specifically tell him what I do. Travel around the world, train corporations, help to grow and scale. It's something I got a good skill set at. How much do you make a day? I said, get $200 a day plus a $50 a day per diem, my travel expenses. And he goes, you know, my first impression on you is a guy like you should be getting paid $10,000 a day. And I'm thinking, yeah, right. I don't even make $10,000 in a month.

0:36:03 - (Darren Jacklin): You know what I mean? There's no way I'm going to get paid $10,000 a day. You're drinking the koolaid, buddy. You know what I mean? You're drinking the koolaid because there's no way it's going to happen, right? And I'm just totally not listening to this guy. I'm like, yeah, right. Kumbaya, right? Let's drink the koolaid and have a group hug. You right now. You have no idea what you're talking about. And this guy's like, I think you should charge people $10,000 a day for your corporate training seminars. I'm like, yeah, right, buddy. I don't know anybody in North America that makes $10,000 a day doing corporate training seminars. So you're out to lunch.

0:36:33 - (Darren Jacklin): So he starts giving this advice. Are you open to my feedback? No, I'm not open to your feedback. Appreciate it, but I'm not going to take it because you don't know what you're talking about because you have no experience in this industry because nobody I know makes that kind of money. And he said, listen, if you're going to come around this mastermind group, be around these people, and net with these people, you need to start asking for $10,000 for a day of corporate training. I'm like, yeah, right, budy. I don't even make that in sometimes two, three months, whatever, right? Net income not going to happen.

0:36:59 - (Darren Jacklin): And he says to me, he says, are you open to a challenge? Of course. I like challenge. I like solving problems. I'm like, yeah. He goes, listen, when you leave here, when you're making all these cold calls, I want you to start asking these companies on the other end for $10,000 for your corporate training services. So I'm thinking to myself, I'm going to go from asking for $200 a day and I'm getting rejected at $200 a day to now $10,000 a day, and I already have a high level of rejection at $200 a day, cold calling out of the phone books.

0:37:28 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah, right. I'm going to now increase my level of rejection, which I'm already high at right now, and go to $10,000. How am I going to eat and pay my bills in a month? Whose couch am I going to sleep on going forward? Right? And I'm thinking, this guy's just ridiculous. Why am I wasting my time being here? Why are we even talking about this in front of a group of people, all these qualified business people?

0:37:47 - (Darren Jacklin): So I leave that day, and I said, the guy said, you're on. I accept your challenge, and I'm going to start asking for $10,000. I'm thinking, yeah, right. Whatever. Let's get out of here. So I leave. Two days later, I get a telephone call from a big company well known in North America that I did training with about a year and a half earlier. Okay. Guy calls me up. And also, one thing, if you don't mind me just being strip this. I'm in this mastermind. And the guy told me, if I'm uncomfortable with asking for $10,000 for a day of corporate training, plus travel expenses, to reach down and grab my balls and start squeezing my balls. True story. Okay.

0:38:20 - (Darren Jacklin): I'm thinking, yeah, right. You're going to want me to reach down on the telephone and start grabing my balls because it's pain or pleasure. So anyways, two days later, I get a phone call. This guy calls me and goes, I need to speak with Darren. Jacqueline. Yeah, he's an executive, real redneck guy from this big oil and gas company. He calls me up, and he goes, darren, we met about 1518 months ago. You were guest speaking at this big conference, and I want to bring you in to do a quarterly off site for my executives in the canadian Rockies.

0:38:45 - (Darren Jacklin): And I want to bring you in. How much for a day of corporate training? So in my mind, I'm thinking, oh, I know where this is going. I'm being set up. This is a test. These guys got together and had a meeting after the meeting, and they're testing me now to see if I'm going to fall through and keep my integrity and keep my word. I know where this is going. I'm thinking, oh, my gosh, but I got to fall through. I got to ask for $10,000.

0:39:08 - (Darren Jacklin): And the guy's talking on the phone about when he wants to do this executive offsite retreat and in a few months in the cane Rockies, all this kind of stuff. He goes, well, how much for a day of corporate training? I pause, and now I'm really scared, and I'm starting to sweat. I'm starting to shake. And I thought, oh, my gosh. And it was probably maybe 510, 15, 20 seconds. But it felt like 15 minutes to me. I was so scared.

0:39:33 - (Darren Jacklin): I reached down, I started grabbing my balls for real. Start squeezing, and I'm thinking, $10,000. He goes, fine. My executive assistant will call you back within 90 minutes. We'll send you a 50% deposit by FedEx. We'll send it to you tomorrow. And then the day you show up for training, we'll give you the 50% deposit, and we'll take care of your travels. My executive will call you back and work that out.

0:39:52 - (Darren Jacklin): And I'm thinking, yeah, right. Okay, great. Thanks for the call. Real polite, professional. Hang up the phone, call. Sure enough, within 90 minutes, his executive sit and calls me back. She goes, Mr. Jacqueline, we agreed to pay you $10,000 a day of corporate training. Yeah, right. I'm trying to get $200 a day. We're not going to go to ten grand. It's impossible. It's impossible. So what happened was, she's like, I just need your mail address. We're going to FedEx you a check. And I said, oh, can you provide me with a tracking number? She goes, yeah, we'll email you the tracking number. So you got it for FedEx?

0:40:20 - (Darren Jacklin): Sure enough, that night, man, I get onto fedEx.com, and I'm looking, sure enough, there's a package being shipped to me within 24 hours. I'm going to have a package. Is this for real? Is this really going to happen? So I realized, okay, this might happen. Now, I owe some money. I've been borrowing money, and I've got some out of integrities, and I've got some people I've made some big promises and not followed through on, and I've fallen short of my integrity. These people, and I need to make it right and call these people, restore my integrity, but also make a repayment to pay these people, saying, okay, $5,000 is coming in. I can play catch up on some people that I'm outstanding with. So I start phoning. People, say, hey, guess what? I've got some money coming in. I can pay you within 48 hours rather than mail you a check because they don't trust me with the check because they'll bounce.

0:41:03 - (Darren Jacklin): I'll come over, and I'll drop off the money, right? So I start phoning these people up, telling them I'm going to drop off some cash because they don't trust. They don't believe me because talk is cheap. And I haven't fallen through and been any good with my word. My words mean nothing to these people because I've over promised, over promised, not followed through on nothing, just all a bunch of talk, right?

0:41:22 - (Darren Jacklin): So anyways, the next day, the FedEx truck arrives. I am so excited to see this FedEx truck. I run out there, and I'm excited to see the FedEx driver, and I get this package. I rip it open. Oh, my gosh. There's a check for $5,000 in this FedEx envelope. I go to the bank, and I'm proud. I'm walking around, I'm saying, hello, hi, greeting people. I'm thinking, wow, does money ever change me? I'm so attached to money when I don't have any money. I'm miserable and upset and don't want to talk to people, don't want to go anywhere, just want to hide. And when I got money, I'm out there. Hello. Hi. Please. Thank you. I'm like, wow, this is really interesting. My behavior.

0:41:56 - (Darren Jacklin): And I sold good awareness, right? So I'm out there. I get in line. I go into the bank, get up the counter, wanted to pause the check, and lady's like, anything I can help with this? Yeah, I need to withdraw the $5,000. I need it. I got to put some money away for taxes, and I got to pay the other money to people I owe money to. So she goes, well, Mr. Jacqueline, she goes, you've never had a check that large ever go through your account before, right, for $5,000.

0:42:20 - (Darren Jacklin): So we're going to have to put a five day business hold on your check. Now, it's actually seven days because I had a weekend coming up of two days, so I had to wait the whole seven days. I said, oh, my gosh, I can't wait seven days. I told these people I'm going to drive by and pay them their money. They don't believe me. I'm going to even show up. I got to follow through. I said, listen, no, you have to give me the money.

0:42:45 - (Darren Jacklin): I can't leave this bank without the money. And she's like, sorry, sir. We put a five day business hold on your account. We have to make sure the funds go through because you've lived in overdraft and you bounced a few checks over the period of time you had your account here. We can't put it through. Banks don't like risk. I said, well, can I talk to your supervisor? Talk to the manager? And she's like, no. And I'm like, okay, I got to do something here.

0:43:08 - (Darren Jacklin): And she's like, sorry. And so I leave the bank, and I'm thinking, oh, my gosh. I call these people up and like, yeah, Darren, yeah, we knew you weren't going to show up. And they're like, unbelievable. So I have to wait a whole seven days. Finally, I go get those people caught up. Now, here's where the story gets even more interesting, and the reason why I'm sharing this story with you and your listeners is there's a lot of life lessons to unpack in here, and I'm going to share a life lesson in just a few minutes that people will remember for the rest of their lives.

0:43:34 - (Darren Jacklin): So I end up a few months later going to the Canadian Rockies and going, doing this corporate retreat this offsite for this group of executives, about twelve people. I'm in the Canadian Rockies, and I do the training all day. Phenomenal, outstanding job. I was well prepared, very organized, got my deliverables. I got the results that I wanted to achieve. Valuations came in high scores, high marks on the evaluation.

0:43:55 - (Darren Jacklin): At the end of this, the group that I was with training were going to go whitewater rafting through the Canadian Rockies. The executive vice president who hired me, he's got a cigarette, smoking a cigarette. He's got a pack of cigarettes here, and he's got my check for $5,000. This guy smoked, like, three packs of cigarettes a day. He goes to me he goes, Darren, everybody's going whitewater rafting.

0:44:17 - (Darren Jacklin): So you and I are going to go walk down the riverbank, go for a walk and debrief. So we start walking down the riverbank in this beautiful canadian Rocky mountains, and he says to me, you know, darren, I got a question to ask you. A few months ago, when I called you up and I asked you how much for a day of corporate training, why did you tell me $10,000? And I'm thinking, oh, my gosh, I hope he doesn't ask for what? A refund?

0:44:42 - (Darren Jacklin): Because I've already spent the first $5,000 that he gave me as a 50% deposit. Another five grand he's got there in the check. That money is already accounted for as well, for catching up on bills and paying my taxes. And I'm thinking, oh, my gosh, this is going to go sideways fast. And I don't know what to do, and this guy's not going to be happy. And I'm just scared, right? All kinds of negative self talk and chatter going on.

0:45:07 - (Darren Jacklin): And he's like, when I asked you for a day of corporate trader, why did you tell me $10,000? And I looked at him straight in the eye, right? I thought, just be calm. Just be calm. Breathe. Just become. Just become. Just become. Breathe. Breathe. You're in the nature. I said, well, you know what? I felt that I'm worth $10,000, and I feel I was well prepared, and I provided the deliverables, and you got the return on investment, and all your executives were very impressed, and the evaluations will verify and backed it up for me.

0:45:33 - (Darren Jacklin): He looks at me, goes, do you have a coach? And I said, well, I have people around me, a coach. He goes, are you open to some feedback? Are you, me coaching you for a few minutes? I'm like, okay. And, yes, sir, I need to be coached because I need the $5,000, too, right? I'm a yes for everything right now, right? And I'm really scared. So he looks at me and he goes, when I asked you how much for a day at corporate training, you told me $10,000.

0:45:58 - (Darren Jacklin): You should never have said that. I'm thinking, oh, my gosh, just recently, I was asking for $200 a day. He goes, you know, you should have asked me what was my budget and what was I willing to pay for a day of corporate training. He goes, you know, Darren, I had budgeted to pay you $25,000 for the day, plus first class travel expenses. Reaches into his pocket. He goes, here's your check for $5,000.

0:46:27 - (Darren Jacklin): You left $15,000 on the table. He goes, you know, Darren, sometimes people believe more in you than you actually believe in yourself. I hope you learned something today that people see more in you than you see in yourself. You got to raise your self confidence and your belief level of what your self worth is and what you deserve in life and what you're open to receiving, because guys like you think you're only worth a couple of. But I'd pay you 25 grand a day because I see the return on the investment of what you do for my executives.

0:46:58 - (Darren Jacklin): Let's go back to camp and have something to eat. And that guy changed my life. And I've been paid as high as $40,000 for a day of corporate training. When I was doing corporate training seminars. I don't do much corporate training anymore. I retired more or less in 2015 from that. But I went from $200 a day because that's what I felt I was worth my deserved level. Going to a mastermind group, being totally uncomfortable, totally exposed, being challenged to ask for $10,000 a day, which is totally my mindset, impossible and outrageous and totally unachievable. Just like me climbing Mount Kilman. Gerald when I was doing all these little hikes around Vancouver, and a budy of mine calls me up 18 months ago and says, hey, darren, I'm turning 40 years of age in 2023.

0:47:41 - (Darren Jacklin): I want you to come with me to Tanzania, East Africa, and climb 19,340ft. And we'll take oxygen with us just in case. Almost 6000 meters. And we're going to climb to the rooftop of Africa to Mount Kilmanjaro, one of the highest mountains on planet earth, next to Mount Everest. And here I am doing all these small little hikes around Vancouver, Canada. And he's like, darren, you can climb Mount Kilmanjo. I'm like, no, I can't. I'm a hard no no, I'm not doing. I'm not an athletic person. I don't have the dna, I don't have the genetics. He goes, Darren, stop arguing me with me for your limitations.

0:48:16 - (Darren Jacklin): Stop arguing with your limitations with me, you can train, develop yourself and build a coach around you and train yourself when you can climb Mount Kilmanjuro with me. And I summited Mount Kilmanjuro in July of 2023, and now I'm trained for Mount Vincent, Antarctica, for January 2025 as a charity event for Linked foundation. ETV elevate, to educate, to build schools around the world. For some of the most impoverished children on the planet.

0:48:38 - (Darren Jacklin): And I never would have thought, if you would have asked me 18 months ago, would I ever be doing Mount Kilmanjaro or would ever be doing Mount Vincent, Antarctica, the Cold coast on earth, I would have said, you're absolutely crazy. That's impossible for me to do something like that. And now I'm in the best physical, mental, emotional, spiritual state of my life, and I've got another year or twelve months still to train before I go to Mount Vincent.

0:48:59 - (Darren Jacklin): So it's just mind boggling. And this is what the impact of these people that have showed up in my path, in my life, from going to a mastermind group where I'm like, why do I need to go? These people are so much better than me. I'm not good enough. I'm not smart enough enough. I can't even afford to ever sign up for the program. If my budy didn't bring me as a guest pass, my credit card would have declined because I couldn't even have paid for the tuition for the day to go to the event.

0:49:20 - (Darren Jacklin): I was so broke, I couldn't even pay for parking on the street. My budy had to pick me up and drive me. So all these things happen. It's never in our way. It's only on our way. And so I have somebody who've overcome a lot of adversities and failures and challenges and setbacks. And I'm here to tell you, from somebody, from an r nine credit rating, which is the worst credit score you can get, to becoming a multimillionaire and somebody who's committed to $100 million, get away to philanthropy in the next decade, right? To somebody who was an r nine credit, living on welfare, homeless, eating my next meal of a garbage dumpster, and even in my book, until I become, I show a picture of me living in a treehouse for seven months, and a friend of mine let me stay because I was flat broke and evicted from my home, and I got my car, reefers. Best I went from there to turning things around, to living an extraordinary life today that most people could only ever dream about through a tremendous amount of adversities and failures and challenges, setbacks. But today, now in my life, I know the structures. I know the systems. I know the processes. I know how to invite the people to have a seat at the table, to be involved with what I'm doing, because I know now the daily habits and the daily routines, because I know what not to do.

0:50:24 - (Darren Jacklin): Because I've mastered that now. I know what to do during the waking hours of my day. Wow.

0:50:30 - (Tawni Nguyen): I'm still marinating in your story.

0:50:32 - (Darren Jacklin): That's incredible.

0:50:35 - (Tawni Nguyen): What do you think your biggest lesson that you've got from climbing the mountain, and how do you apply that to your everyday life?

0:50:41 - (Darren Jacklin): Good question. So, first 48 hours on Mount Kilmanjaro, I got slapped in the face, metaphorically, like a life lesson of patience. Because I'm an impatient person. I like to make things happen and get things done. On the disc profile, I'm a DM, a driver. I'm driven, right? When I'm focused on something, like a dog on a boat, I want to make things happen, get things done. So what happened was, I trained for a year for Mount Kilimanjaro, and I arrive in Tanzania, East Africa. I meet with my team. So we had 20 climbers, 20 hikers in my group with mountains and marathons out of Australia. That was a group I was with. There's 20 hikers, ten mountain guides, and 70 porters, which are like the Sherpas that you see in Nepal with Mount Everest.

0:51:23 - (Darren Jacklin): And so here I am, day one, day two, day three on Mount Kilmanjaro, and we're going, like, really slow pulley, pulley. And we're going, like a bunch of kids in elementary school or preschool going to the park. You see the kids when you drive down the street, and all the kids are going really slow. That's how fast we're going on Mount Kilman. I'm thinking, this is ridiculous. I didn't train for a year for this. I didn't spend all this time and energy and money to fly all the way across the world to come to Tanzan, East Africa, to go this slow, to climb Mount Kilmanjaro. We're going to pick up the pace to go a lot faster.

0:51:53 - (Darren Jacklin): So what happened was all these people are passing us on day one and day two and day three, all these athletes and all these other people climb Mount Kilmanjaral. So I'm getting impatient. I got triggered. I got triggered. And now I'm confrontational. I'm aggressive with my guides. I'm like, listen, we got to pick up the pace. We're going way too slow. One guide turns around Angela, and she says, darren, you need to learn to be patient.

0:52:15 - (Darren Jacklin): You need to slow down. You need to trust the process, and you need to pulley, Pulley. And she must have said pulley, pulley to me over a thousand times over the ten days I was with her five days up, two days down. But I was with the team for ten days, and I kept on hearing, pulley, pulley, slow, steady, slow, steady. One step at a time, one step at a time. And I had to slow right down. And I'm thinking, oh, my gosh, I'm going so slow. We're almost walking backwards.

0:52:40 - (Darren Jacklin): Like, stop. Taking a deep breath, step, stop, step. For seven, 8 hours. I'm thinking, unbelievable. And I tell you, what it did for me is it got me present in my body. My relationship with Tatiana has drastically changed because I was always in my head, I'd always compartmentalize, and I wasn't fully in my body feeling my emotions and my feelings. So if I can't feel my emotions and my feelings, how can I connect to another person or to another woman at a deep, intimate, connected level?

0:53:10 - (Darren Jacklin): So it transformed my life. Being on Mount Kilman, Gerald was learning how to be in my meat suit in this physical human being body and connecting myself and just, okay, I surrender. Because I realized the first three days, I didn't listen to my mountain guides, didn't listen to them, I knew better. Why? Because I trained for a year. I was in the best shape of my life. I trained. I was disciplined, accountable, reliable, consistent focus.

0:53:36 - (Darren Jacklin): I was like, man, I'm doing something I never thought my wildest dreams I'd ever do is fly from Canada all the way to Mount Kilmanjaro and Climb something I never thought in my life I'd ever do. And now I'm here. Now this is the champion. This is the Super bowl I'm going to. And I realized I was not coachable the first three days. So what I look at now as an awareness in my life is, where am I not being coachable in my life?

0:53:59 - (Darren Jacklin): Right? Like, I had a gentleman call me the other day, a good friend of mine, he's like, darren, I need to hire a new coach in the new year. I want to hire a coach. I said, what do you mean, a coach? Like, be more specific, too general. What kind of coach? Because I need a whole life coach. Coach for my whole life. I said, are you married? Yeah. He goes, yeah. I said, listen. I said, the best coach you'll ever meet in your life is your wife, your partner, your intimate partner.

0:54:23 - (Darren Jacklin): What are you talking about? I said, she knows your strengths. She knows your weaknesses. She knows your insecurities. She knows your blind spots. She knows everything about you because she's with you the majority of the time. So the feedback that she's given you, you look at it as bitching or complaining or griping or whining you're going to hire some coach, which, again, I'm not against coaches, but you're going to hire some coach to coach you on the same information that she's given you.

0:54:48 - (Darren Jacklin): And he starts laughing. So guess what? He went to his wife and told his wife what I had told him, and she goes, yeah, he's right. I've given you the same information that you would hire a therapist or coach for. So sometimes we don't realize that our closest people in our lives, our greatest coaches, our greatest mentors in our lives, the people are the closest to us that love us the most and care about us the most because they want to protect us and keep us safe. Now, sometimes they can hold us back because they want to protect us and keep us safe. They don't want us to take calculated risks.

0:55:15 - (Darren Jacklin): So you got to weigh that out. But I learned a lot. I learned, number one, to trust myself. My self confidence is at a way much higher level, even though I was very high, self confident. But how I've even taken my self confidence to a whole higher level is keeping my word and following through and committing to my commitments. Powerful breakthrough in my life. Commit to my commitments even when things are hard, even when things are challenging, even things are tough, even when I don't feel like it, even if I'm jet lagged or I'm tired or it's early in the morning or late at night, I follow through on what I give my word to. I commit to my commitments, and I always do complete work, and I always show people notice that what you give your word to do, you actually follow through. Even when it's hard, even when it's inconvenient, even when it's challenging, even. You don't even feel like it. You commit to your commitment because you gave your word to do it. So, for a whole year, when I was training for Kilmanjaro, I was training snowstorms, blizzards, cold weather, freezing rain, hail, all kinds of stuff. And I'd have people come out saying, yeah, I'll be there on the hiking trail with you to train.

0:56:19 - (Darren Jacklin): And it's snowing or it's blizzarding or it's foggy or it's raining, and nobody else shows up. And I'm like, okay, do I get out of my car right now, it's pouring rain, or I just go home and chalk it up? It's a rained out day from hiking. No. I gave my word I'd be here. I lauded this time on my calendar. I'm going to do complete work. I'm going to do the hiking no matter what it takes. And I would go out there many times, even my little dog, my little Bishon Shitsu, Cleo, my dog, he would come out with me in all kinds of weather.

0:56:49 - (Darren Jacklin): I'm thinking, man, this little dog is so committed. He's twelve years old and he's committed. He's committed to his commitment. And so I'd go out and do this. And so I look at people now as, are you really committed to your commitments? When things are hard, when they're uncomfortable, when they're inconvenient? Or are you going to say, no, I'm not going to train today, I'm not going to go out and do that because I don't feel right. I don't feel good.

0:57:09 - (Darren Jacklin): And that's a big thing for people. Most people are not committed to their commitments. They commit when it's convenient, but they don't commit when it's uncomfortable.

0:57:18 - (Tawni Nguyen): I love the part that you brought up, how your partner and your intimate partner actually knows you better, because I think a lot of people don't allow their ego to kind of just to be seen and to be seen, to be understood is really hard, especially for men, right? Because they're always the protector. They have to be masculine, because if they're vulnerable, then, in your words, they expose a part of themselves that they.

0:57:45 - (Darren Jacklin): Feel or a sign of weakness. Right.

0:57:46 - (Tawni Nguyen): As a sign of weakness. And I really appreciate and acknowledge the fact that you are bringing such a light into the difference in terms of how you carry yourself in integrity and still show true authenticity and true vulnerability and how that carries into your relationship, especially with allowing women to feel more empowered in their intuition. I have a couple last words. Like a lot of things lately that we've talked about is we have such a big digital Persona online.

0:58:14 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I've been asking the question of if social media didn't exist, how would you live your life differently and what would your legacy be?

0:58:24 - (Darren Jacklin): Absolutely. Yeah. So I feel that a lot of things. So, for example, recently with Elon Musk, with the announcement of the new truck, that they're coming out with Tesla, I feel that changed a lot with social media, because now people are like, oh, my gosh, you can shoot at the truck, right? Because they were showing how they're making this bullet resistance, bulletproof truck. And I thought my lifetime, that I would never, ever have to be in an armored vehicle.

0:58:50 - (Darren Jacklin): And I'm thinking to myself, is now, because of social media, is this what we're going to see, in the next couple of years, people think, oh my gosh, you're in that Tesla truck. You can shoot it because it's bullet resistance or bulletproof. So that was a thing I wish that they would not have shown on social media, because now I think to myself, are we going to go into in the next five years where a lot of vehicles are going have to, to become armored vehicles here in North America? So that was scary for me to see that.

0:59:11 - (Darren Jacklin): I think a lot of times, too, is that mental health plays a big part. And I see this with our e two e elevate to educate community that so many people are impacted in positive ways. Social media has done a lot of positive things. It's created shared experiences and photos and memories and celebrations and all that kind of stuff is great. There's benefits and drawbacks to everything. But I think some of the drawbacks is a lot of scams on social media. A lot of romance, date night scams. A lot of men and women have been taken advantage of financially.

0:59:39 - (Darren Jacklin): A lot of cryptocurrency scams. A lot of pump and dump scams have happened on social media by people not verifying and vetting people. They're just instant messaging back and forth and not getting onto a Zoom video call or a Facetime or meeting the person face to face to verify and vet as part of their due diligence. So that's some of the drawbacks. I think also, too, is that some people comparing themselves to other people and some people quitting way too soon because they think it's not what it is. You've got people out there that are selling you this dream.

1:00:10 - (Darren Jacklin): That's a fantasy, that's not real, and that's not really how it is. And if you actually looked behind the scenes and seen how this person really lived their lives, it's not what they're displaying on social media, right. It's completely different, and it's used as marketing and to sell the hype and to sell the sizzle. And I don't like that. I don't like the fakeness of social media. I like people being transparent, being authentic, be raw, be vulnerable, and put your cards on the table. Be real with people.

1:00:36 - (Darren Jacklin): That's why when I go guest speak at a lot of places, and I get voted a lot of times as the best speaker, people say, why authenticity vulnerability? Because I know what it's like to be in the audience sitting and thinking, man, I want to become more successful. I want to take care of my family. I want to do things for people. I'm just wanting to figure out how to pay my bills on time. This person's on stage talking about some new car they just bought or some glorious trip they did or some new watch they bought or some new purse or handbag, and I can't relate to that. There's such a gap because I don't know the steps in between.

1:01:08 - (Darren Jacklin): And so to me, more people relate to, like, for example, I got knighted last year by the royal family of Spain, and I became a. You know, a lot of people have now said to me, darren, you need to put on all your social media that you're a serve, because it's an inspiration to a lot of people, and it gives people hope, possibility, and people have never met somebody. But I was very against it at first because I didn't want to come from ego or bragging or making myself look better than anybody and having somebody put me on a pedestal and then minimize themselves and put themselves in the pit. I didn't want that. I wanted to be a humble person, a servant leader, to make a difference in people's lives.

1:01:43 - (Darren Jacklin): And people like, no, you've earned it. You've worked hard all your life for I. But I still, when I go places, I just like to approach people and just like, hey, I'm Darren. Good to meet you. If I'm at a formal event, I'll go under Sir Darren. Jacqueline. So I think it's important that people, the Persona they have on social media is who they are, because behavior never lies. And a big thing I look at is know you can put all this fake stuff on there on your social media channels. But one thing I always share with people, time will either promote you or time will expose you.

1:02:14 - (Darren Jacklin): It's just a matter of time. So people always ask me, hey, Jared, what do you think of this person on social media? Time will either promote that person or time will expose that person. It's just a matter of time. Whether they get promoted, they get exposed. And that's why you see people with some of these scandals and things that are going on, they're being exposed. I got exposed with my health a few years ago, right? I was eating a lot of fast food, junk food, hotel food, airplane food, and it compounded to a point where my buttons are going to blow on my shirt.

1:02:40 - (Darren Jacklin): And I realized, oh, my gosh, I don't want to live my life this way anymore. I got exposure on my finances. I was up and down all the time, realizing one day I'm like, oh, my gosh, my landlord wants to break my legs. I don't want to live my life this way anymore. Because what I realized from that experience was that most people will not make a change in their life until a crisis occurs. And I realized that after I had a few different cris in my life, why do I have to wait to make a change in my life for a crisis to occur?

1:03:05 - (Darren Jacklin): Why can't I just be proactive versus reactive? And so I realized now, with me coming Mount Kilimanjaro, now training for mount Vincent in Antarctica, I'm thinking, what if I could just set a new standard in my life that I train, develop myself a minimum of 2 hours a day. They're like, well, we only have 24 hours in a day. So what are some things I need to delegate or say no to in my life and set some healthy boundaries and saying no so that 2 hours a day is my time and my calendar for me to have self care time and mental wellness time for myself, to take care of myself.

1:03:37 - (Darren Jacklin): So I hike almost every day of the year, unless I'm traveling, I'm hiking. It's one of the things I do every day and working out and exercising. But I never, a few years ago, I never imagined in my life, I never had the value system, the belief system to ever do something like that. I was just never that guy. So I thought, okay, great. What if I could step back? And what if I could reevaluate myself and make some healthy choices and positive changes to actually become that person?

1:04:01 - (Darren Jacklin): Actually become that person who's got a phenomenal body, who could have abs in a six pack that I'm working towards and create longevity in my life and multiply and expand my energy? What if I could learn how to become financially independent and get my money right and being integrated at that? What if I could take my credit score from being so bad as an r nine to actually having phenomenal credit where I can get pre approved like I do now. I get pre approved on things without even having to apply because my credit is so incredible.

1:04:30 - (Darren Jacklin): But it just doesn't happen overnight. It takes sometimes years to do that. But I worked on it and I set a target. This is my target. So I want to go. I want to go from r nine, having phenomenal high levels of credit. I want to be able to have that integrity and that reputation that people can rely on me, I'm accountable, I'm responsible, I'm integral. And I give my word, and my word is my law, my word is my bond.

1:04:52 - (Tawni Nguyen): Wow. No, thank you for sharing this time with us today and my pleasure. It's a really valuable resource, and I love everything that you said, so it's still giving me chills. For me, it's like being in person with someone is different. But in our circumstances, I can't wait to read your book, and I can't wait to hit you up when I actually leave Las Vegas and into, I think my passport expires this year or something, so I got to get working on that.

1:05:19 - (Darren Jacklin): Absolutely. You got to come to Vancouver or we'll do a hiking e two e event somewhere in the US. I'm actually looking at Camelback Mountain in Phoenix, Arizona. We're inquiring about that place to actually do that as one of our e two e locations. Elevate to educate hiking fundraiser locations. Because so many people live in the greater Phoenix area, they drive by and drive around Cowback Mountain but have never hiked it.

1:05:38 - (Tawni Nguyen): Yeah. So let me know about that, and I would love to set something up with you.

1:05:41 - (Darren Jacklin): Sure.

1:05:42 - (Tawni Nguyen): And I just want to thank you again for showing up.

1:05:44 - (Darren Jacklin): My pleasure.

1:05:45 - (Tawni Nguyen): Who you are. Your energy is just so high, and I just love the vibrations that you put out and everything that you've said. Where can people find you?

1:05:53 - (Darren Jacklin): Yeah, you know what? Go to hikingfundraiser.com. That's a great place to find me. Lots of great information there. Hikingfundraiser.com and share with your friends and family. If people want to order the book, just type in it's until I become. They can go to Amazon or until I become. It's an international book, lots of rave reviews all over the world on it. And it's made a huge difference in a lot of people's lives. But it's called until I become.

1:06:15 - (Darren Jacklin): Or you can go to hikingfundraiser.com or just google my name. Cool.

1:06:20 - (Tawni Nguyen): Well, thank you so much, and thank you guys for spending some time with us today. I hope you got some value out of that. Hopefully you can connect with Darren offline. He's a cool dude. His energy is just the same online or virtually as in person. And you can find me on IG at Tawnisaurus or at fit and frugal pod. So thanks again and make that decision to change your life. So stay fit . Stay frugal.

1:06:44 - (Tawni Nguyen): Peace. Bye.