Embracing Simplicity: Mindful Practices for Better Mental Well-being

Is mindfulness the key to navigating our turbulent times? Join us for a compelling conversation with Marilisa Lawless, a distinguished marriage and family therapist with a wealth of experience in trauma therapy, addictions, hypnotherapy, Reiki, and herbalism. Marilisa offers invaluable insights on embracing mindfulness and simple yet powerful practices like deep breathing to maintain mental well-being. She also delves into the transformative power of silent retreats and the importance of attuning to your body’s needs through individualized approaches to diet and health. Forget the myths about meditation being complicated—Marilisa reveals how its simplicity can be accessible to everyone.

But what happens when mindfulness isn't enough? In this episode, we tackle the difficult yet crucial topic of seeking help during mental health crises. We discuss how anonymous hotlines like the national 988 suicide hotline and Broward County's 211 service provide a lifeline for those who prefer not to confide in family members. These resources offer 24/7 access to live counselors, ensuring that no one has to endure their struggles alone. This conversation highlights the urgent need for mental health first responders to be as readily available as medical professionals, creating a support network that can make the difference between hope and despair. Tune in for a deeply informative and potentially life-changing discussion.

Chapters

• 0:00 Coping Mechanisms and Mindful Healing
• 8:47 National Hotline Numbers for Mental Health

Transcript

Ry Rossano: 0:00

Maril isa Lawless. And what do you do Sometimes?

Marilisa Lawless: 0:05

it's hard to say what I do it's easier to say what I don't do.

Marilisa Lawless: 0:09

I am a marriage and family therapist who specializes in treating trauma. Okay, I have been doing this well over 30 years. So over the course of those years, I've also educated myself on a master's level. Besides being a licensed marriage and family therapist, I'm also a master's level certified addictions professional. Then also, I am a hypnotherapist, a clinical hypnotherapist. I am a Reiki master, which is a form of Japanese energy healing, and I am an herbalist because I believe in using some natural things.

Ry Rossano: 0:42

That is so cool everyone listening. Now you know what degrees you need to go get and certifications, because she's a girl boss. So I know you just mentioned that you are a mental health counselor, so you specialize in trauma therapy. I think something me and my viewers want to know is what would you tell someone who is struggling with the current state of our world?

Marilisa Lawless: 1:02

Take a breath At the end of the day, just take a deep breath. Yes, you know, one of the things that's been that I didn't even mention. One of the things that I do for myself is I do silent retreats. I go to and attend silent retreats week long in the woods with the mentor and a group of people, but it it's silent and that place of mindfulness and silence is truly healing. It helps with anxiety, it helps with sleep, it helps with so many different pieces as a base. So when somebody is feeling really ramped up, stop and take three deep breaths.

Ry Rossano: 1:39

That is absolutely amazing and I feel like it's healing. Because it's so quiet, you can kind of tune out the noise of the world.

Marilisa Lawless: 1:49

Well, I don't know that. It's about tuning out the noise of the world.

Ry Rossano: 1:52

It's just about noticing it and not grabbing a hold of it. You can get kind of be more zen.

Marilisa Lawless: 1:55

Yeah, that's amazing.

Ry Rossano: 1:56

So what coping mechanisms would you share if you could give a few for anyone listening struggling with, maybe coping with anxiety, depression, um, ptsd? What are your go-to coping mechanisms?

Marilisa Lawless: 2:09

well, the post-traumatic stress is like an over overlying. It's an umbrella for a lot of different things, because anxiety is part of the depression can be a part of it physical pain can be a part of it.

Marilisa Lawless: 2:21

There's so many different components to post-traumatic stress. Yes, and at this point, most people are suffering on some level from post-trauma, whether it's from what's happened in the past few years or from earlier in their own lives. It could be as a result of anything. So, with post-traumatic stress at its core, the basics of eat right and exercise that really does do a lot for you know, across the board, for a lot of different things, absolutely, and people don't always. It really is that simple, even though it's that challenging, you know, because our food quality is not great. So, really trying to find the foods that work best for you and your body and everybody is different. I couldn't agree more. People are really strong about you have to do it this way or do it this way. You know what.

Marilisa Lawless: 3:10

Figure out what works best for you it's individualized mm-hmm, and it's really pay attention to your body absolutely what's going on.

Ry Rossano: 3:17

I couldn't have said it better myself. Um what do you gravitate towards?

Marilisa Lawless: 3:24

nutrition wise um, probably for me. I try to do organic. I try to just eat the fruit that I grow in my backyard.

Ry Rossano: 3:31

That's amazing.

Marilisa Lawless: 3:32

I seldom that I buy anything. I follow basically a plant-based diet, but I will also do fish on occasion, so I do pescetarian. I guess would be the label that I attached to myself and that, and I gave up meat, not for any health reasons. I gave up meat because I was raising these animals and I realized they had like these personalities and I just couldn't you know.

Ry Rossano: 3:57

So you do you, but for me that's where I am and yeah, you know everybody everybody's different.

Marilisa Lawless: 4:04

Everybody is different.

Ry Rossano: 4:05

Have you noticed that it helped with your own mental health and you know maybe the challenges that you face, or would you recommend that kind of diet to anyone struggling with their own mental health issues?

Marilisa Lawless: 4:16

Um, again, I think that people have to learn to listen to their own bodies Absolutely. I know that there are some basics that we know are really. You know that we've been told over and over too much red meat is just not good for the body. You know. Pork the other white meat sometimes is also not good for that. It's just not good for the body.

Marilisa Lawless: 4:35

You have to be able to listen to what your body needs Absolutely and really that comes down to paying attention, and that's what we don't do. We don't pay attention. Often, by the time we are paying attention, it is crisis and we end up at a doctor and the doctor gives you a pharmaceutical, then the pharmaceuticals have side effects, then they're giving you another pharmaceutical to take care of the side effects from that pharmaceutical, and the list goes on and on. It's a whole process, yeah, so my wish for each individual is that they start paying attention again. The simplest of tasks is take three deep breaths and just check in with yourself and say, literally, talk to yourself and say what do I need to do for me today?

Ry Rossano: 5:15

Absolutely. I love that and I feel like when you notice how things make you feel you kind of are able to go through your day better and kind of cognitively think about that throughout your entire day, which is amazing, Absolutely you know which is amazing?

Marilisa Lawless: 5:27

Absolutely, you know it is. It's very challenging, but once we get used to it it's a lot easier. It's like meditation. Yeah, you know, I tell people meditation is super, super simple. Oh, I can't meditate. I can't meditate.

Ry Rossano: 5:41

And in reality.

Marilisa Lawless: 5:42

Everyone can. People have been mistaught on what meditation is. They think that their minds gonna be a blank slate. Your mind is going to go like in five seconds, like oh, I forgot to do that, oh, I need to do that. What if I haven't for lunch? You?

Marilisa Lawless: 5:58

know, it's just, and the whole goal is to just come back to your breath. Yeah, everything truly just connects back to the breath. Whether it's anxiety, depression, you know depression. Get outside in the Sun, put your shoulders back in your face up. Yeah, absolutely Everything truly just connects back to the breath.

Ry Rossano: 6:10

Whether it's anxiety, depression, you know depression get outside in the sun, put your shoulders back and your face up yeah, absolutely, face up in the sun. Get some sunlight and some you know good energy, and you'll feel so much better. I'm sure what I want to talk about is I know there are five stages of grief and healing, and I'm pretty sure they are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Do you want to touch on those?

Marilisa Lawless: 6:34

Absolutely so. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, when she wrote that book she's actually talked about it it wasn't meant as five stages of death. She actually meant it as something else. But most people understand those stages as something and they're not linear. Yeah, you know, it could be. One day I feel like I'm pretty okay with the losses I've had in my life, because death and dying isn't necessarily about a person.

Marilisa Lawless: 6:56

Absolutely, it could be a relationship, it could be something coming to an end yeah, absolutely yes, and that the denial is, you know, I really just life is just better if I just think about it this way, you know, and deny that it's even an issue. Right, the bargaining, you know, the if only Right, it is just, it can be very complicated, it's not really that complicated. Again, taking care of yourself, yet focusing on what it is you need as an individual, yeah, and learning to ask for help Absolutely, when you can learn to ask to say I feel really sad and I could use a hug. Yeah, I feel really angry, I think I'm gonna go for a walk. You know, taking a walk around the lake is an expression for dealing with anger Absolutely. And they're all human emotions, they're all natural. They're all normal. We all do it right. People aren't punching bags.

Ry Rossano: 7:54

We can't treat them like that and no matter what we're dealing with inside, we can't take that out on others. So I love that you mentioned that and I feel like taking a walk would be so much better than, like you know, screaming at someone or taking it out on someone else, because that affects everybody Absolutely.

Marilisa Lawless: 8:10

When you see road rage, right you know when you see somebody cut you off, especially in Florida, Miami, you know, instead of getting angry to just say oh okay, you're in a hurry, Go ahead, Right?

Ry Rossano: 8:20

Maybe we need to think maybe they're having a bad day or maybe something's going on in their life, because I feel like everyone is dealing with something that we don't know behind closed doors, whether they share it or not, or they look like they're dealing with something or not. There's so many things, from invisible illnesses to invisible mental illnesses. Um, I think smiling depression is real. I think you could know the happiest person and they could be really sad and really going through it, and I think that's something that I want to talk about in a little bit. But something that you said that I want to touch on is how do you ask for help? What would you tell somebody who maybe they're not shy maybe they're shy or maybe they're not someone that wants to feel comfortable, to talk to their parents or talk to anybody and be like I'm struggling, I need help? What would you say to that person or those people in the world?

Marilisa Lawless: 9:06

if people are not comfortable asking for help. It's know what hotline numbers are like 988. It's a national hotline for suicide help. You know when you're thinking about it, when you're feeling it, broward county actually has 211, which is the same about it. When you're feeling it, broward County actually has 211, which is the same as 988. And there's all kinds of recorded things. There's actually live people. There's live counselors. There people are often willing to ask strangers for help before they ask their family. That's so sad, it is and it really.

Marilisa Lawless: 9:37

Every family culture is different, so it's it's about what, what is most comfortable for you? Absolutely. The suffering and silence has never, never been beneficial for anyone. Yeah, and yet people do it. So being able to reach out in an anonymous way to one of these hotlines, yeah, is an option that's amazing yeah, and it's, and again, it's something that's available 24 7, because that's another piece.

Marilisa Lawless: 10:04

They don't want to disturb anybody. It's the middle of the night and they're woke up. You know they've woken and they've had these. You know they're having a nightmare. They had need to somebody to talk to these numbers.

Ry Rossano: 10:14

There's somebody there, 24 7, that's amazing and that's, and it's a live person it's kind of like a first responder in a way, for your mental health, absolutely. I feel like we often think about medical professionals always being there, but we need the same with mental health professionals, because mental illness is real.