Take Command: Intentional Living for a Post-Pandemic World | Joe Hart Interview

Join hosts Rhett Power and Cynthia Johnson as they interview Joe Hart, CEO of Dale Carnegie Global, about his new book "Take Command: Intentional Living for a Post-Pandemic Anxious World." Co-authored with Michael Crom, Dale Carnegie's grandson, this book offers valuable insights on leading a purposeful and intentional life, especially in the challenging post-pandemic era. Discover practical strategies to take command of your thoughts, emotions, relationships, and future.

Key Discussion Points:
- Introduction to Joe Hart: Learn about Joe's journey from practicing law to becoming an entrepreneur and eventually leading Dale Carnegie Global.
- Inspiration Behind the Book: Discover why Joe and Michael decided to write "Take Command" and its relevance in today's anxious world.
- Core Concepts of the Book: Explore the three main sections: taking command of your thoughts and emotions, your relationships, and your future.
- Importance of Dale Carnegie's Principles: Understand how timeless principles from Dale Carnegie's classic works remain relevant and impactful today.
- Navigating Post-Pandemic Challenges: Gain insights into how to lead effectively and maintain resilience in a constantly changing environment.
- Developing Intentionality: Learn how to align your values with your actions and make intentional choices that lead to a fulfilling life.
- Leadership and Culture: Hear Joe's thoughts on creating a positive organizational culture and the importance of leaders taking command.

Why Watch This Episode?
- Gain insights from a leader who has successfully navigated multiple industries and now leads a global organization.
- Learn practical strategies to improve your leadership skills, enhance personal growth, and build stronger relationships.
- Discover how to live intentionally and take command of your life, especially in a post-pandemic world.

📕 Get your copy of  "Take Command: Intentional Living for a Post-Pandemic Anxious World" wherever books are sold!

👍 Don't forget to like, subscribe, and hit the notification bell for more inspiring interviews with best-selling authors.

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Stay connected with us: BestSeller.live
Rhett Power: rhettpower.com
Cynthia Johnson: cynthialive.com

Rhett Power and Cynthia Johnson, both accomplished authors, entrepreneurs, and speakers, co-host Best Seller TV, interviewing fellow authors about their nonfiction books. With their expertise and engaging style, they create insightful and captivating conversations. Rhett's dynamic charisma and Cynthia's thoughtful approach make for a winning combination beyond mere promotion, offering viewers a deep dive into authors' minds.

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Transcript

Unknown: 0:00

Matt, welcome to another episode of bestseller TV. It is great to be with you. I'm Rhett power, one of your hosts. My other host is right over here next to me. Hey, Cynthia,

Cynthia Johnson: 0:22

hi, red. How are you great to see you? Yeah, yeah,

Unknown: 0:28

it's good to be back. We've got Joe Hart today. Joe is now the CEO of Carnegie global, and I'm sure you know who Dale Carnegie is, and and they've he's just written a new book with, actually, Carnegie's grandson, about intentional living for a post pandemic, anxious world. It's called Take command, and it just hit the wall street bestseller list, which is phenomenal. And Joe is a, I'm guessing, a happy to not be practicing law anymore, a former attorney, as he smiles and turned entrepreneur. He was founded and ran the E Learning Company, info alley, and which served companies like McGraw Hill and Motorola also asset health, which is a health tech company and now in 2015 went over To run Dale Carnegie's global operations. Joe, welcome and congratulations on the best seller list with take command and welcome to the program. Yeah, thanks. Rhett, it's nice to be with you. Cynthia, great to be

Cynthia Johnson: 1:51

with you too. It's the honor is all mine. I i was looking at your your bio, and someone, once, someone, said to me, if you want to be successful, you work in education and healthcare and and you've done healthcare, education law like you're every like mother's dream child, I have to, I have to know why, after all of these, the all of this success, why did I write your book now? And why this book?

Unknown: 2:21

Yeah, well, first of all, thank you again for asking the question. And just to go back to Rhett, you know, I started my career as an attorney. I like to think it's a recovering attorney. It really program. Left the practice of law and went into business. But, you know, part of the reason I left the practice of law, ultimately, and went into business, was Dale Carnegie. Took a Dale Carnegie course when I was in my 20s. It led me to really rethink my vision. It's had a huge impact on my life. I took a Dale Carnegie course. My wife, my six kids, have all taken Dale Carnegie program. So this is a program that's been hugely transformational for me and, you know, and it's been a really big part of my leadership and my journey. And then, you know, we got through, got into covid. And boy, you know, that was something that just really hit the world hard. Clearly, in it, it hit our business very hard. At the time that covid hit, we were 95% in person, face to face training around the world, 200 operations, 86 countries, almost all of that was in person and, you know, so I had one of these just gut check moments, even in terms of my leadership, and ultimately was grateful. This was part of the reason why we wrote to take command, you know, because the principles of Dale Carnegie not only helped me get through that from a leadership standpoint, I think it helped me become a better leader. Our whole organization has come out of covid much stronger. And I look at the world today, and this is when I reached out to Michael Crom in the midst of covid, saying, you know, the world is really struggling. It's really hurting emotionally as much as anything else. And what if we could write a book built on Dale Carnegie's principles for today's generation, with lots of current stories and situations that people can relate to, and bringing in research and so forth. So the goal was to build on Dale Carnegie's the brilliance of how to win friends and influence people, how to stop working and start living, and to really get it to people in a way that could help them, not only coming out of that pandemic pandemic, but in the years to come. I don't know how to ask the question. But I you know is, and I want to go back a little bit before we get into more of the strategic vision of the book. Is the Book Seven Habits of how to influence people. Is that still relevant today? You think you mean How to Win Friends and Influence People? Yes, yes, that book is interesting. You ask because, and I know you're a best selling author. Rhett, this has been a best selling book for 87 consecutive years, and you wonder why and how part of it is because the idea is that Dale Carnegie was. Was developing and innovating around 100 years ago, 87 years ago, are every bit as important today, maybe even more so, you know, because I think as much as there's technology and so forth, as we're still people, we still have, you know, a craving to be appreciated and valued, and we want relationships and quality relationships. In fact, the world's so polarized, and as much as there's technology, we're disconnected, we're alienated, we're isolated. And so you know, so much of Dale Carnegie's ideas are about bringing people together and helping people have these strong relationships and to succeed, if it's in our families or with our friendships or in our work. You know, the people who excel in work are often the people who are really adept at interacting with other people, which is why you know how to win friends. Continues to be so popular today,

Cynthia Johnson: 5:47

maybe seven years. That is not everybody who reads that book. I mean, a lot of people have been reading it, end up running the company. So there must be something about the way you think that that led you down this path. And are you touching it all like, which aspects of your career you touch on in the book,

Unknown: 6:15

which aspects of my career? Yeah, yeah. You know. I mean, there are lots of stories that go from, really the early part of my career, throughout some of the difficult decisions and challenges that I had, starting a business with nothing, leaving a great job, when I had two young children at home, navigating a business through a startup post 911 and the internet bubble and that type of thing, and then, you know, right up through Dale, Carnegie and covid. So, you know, that's and I hope, you know, I hope Cynthia that that a lot of the lessons that I've learned and that Michael have learned over the years in the wisdom, will be helpful to people, you know, because we've had these experiences, and they're just things that's like, Gosh, I wish I had known in my 20s the things that I know now. And so much of that building a Dale Carnegie is forming the framework of this book, this taking command, being intentional. Did you struggle with the title? I love the title. I think it's a I think it's powerful, and it speaks to me in a lot of ways. And I often, when we write these books and we do this, we we kind of labor over it. What was the when you How did take command? How did that title come to you? Yeah, it's interesting, right? You know, we had take command had been a mantra. And Dale Carnegie, I think we came out with that kind of terminology in 2018 and it really is about, you know, it's strong language, right? I mean, it's take command but it's take command of your life, take command of your business, take command of your health, take command of your thoughts, take command of your emotions. Take many relationships. So, you know, it really has had some resonance in in Dale, Carnegie, we were talking about it for a period of time. I actually host a podcast called the Dale Carnegie take command podcast, which we formed in January of 2020, of all time. So when it came time to the book, you know, it's funny, because it seemed like a natural title to me and to Michael, my co author, but Simon and Schuster and Schuster and Ed said, hey, you know, this is a strong title you want. Maybe you want to call it something else. And so, but, but ultimately, we said, You know what? This is a book about action. It's a really a book about, you know, this is the life that we have. We want to live the best, most full life we can. So we want to encourage people, hey, look, this isn't think about it. This isn't study about this. Isn't, you know, this is a take command right now, so we really felt that was the right title.

Cynthia Johnson: 8:46

Yeah, that's that's very fitting. I'm taking myself back to March of 2020 for a second and and you're describing this, you know, idea of being intentional and really making choices that you're aware of, not just the ones that like, sort of guide you how what like in the process of writing the book I'm getting. You know, the world came back. I don't know if we say what the term is, when, like, did you? Did you time the launch appropriately, you know, I mean, how? Because this is about, oh, we went through this post covid world. Or did that come later when you realized post covid was a thing? Yeah, you

Unknown: 9:32

know, it really, it really happened. So the idea of the book, the first conversation I had with Michael was in June 2020 and it's funny when you said, Hey, go back to March 2020, I think it's easy at this time to kind of forget at that particular point, you know, there was so much uncertainty. We didn't know what was going to happen. We were still in lockdowns. It was just, it was a lot of fear and anxiety and stress. And there still is, of course, today. So we knew at that time that writing the book we would it probably wouldn't come out until after. After the covid crisis had passed. But you know, the idea was, you know, whether it's during covid or after covid, these things are still going to apply meaning, you know. And the book is broken into three parts. Take command of your thoughts and your emotions, right? So we all have fears and insecurities and worries and stresses. And why is it? You could have two people who are in the same situation, and then one person, they're resilient, they're courageous, the other is just struggling. And so the idea here was even for a post pandemic world, hey, we're gonna have all kinds of challenges. So how do you help take command of your thoughts and your emotions and taking command of your relationships? You know, critical people, difficult people. Do we have boundaries for ourselves? How do you build trust and build enduring relationships? So that was the second kind of idea. Build on Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends, influence people, and then take him into your future. You know, one of the things Rhett and Cynthia that we researched was what's the biggest regret that people have on their deathbed, and it has been that I didn't live courageously. I didn't live the life I wanted to live. And you know, what a horrible thing for someone to get to that stage of their life to say, and I can't do anything at this point. So the this idea of taking command of our future is do it right now. You know, don't wait. Don't waste another day. Start to think about your vision and your values and your purpose and as you define it for yourself, and really take action. So to your question, it really was, you know, I wish that this had been, we had this host before covid, because I think it could have been very helpful. And at the same time, you know, our hope is, right now that this is something that really is a manual for empowering people, for living really more full and complete life. Well, like you know it goes, and I hate to put these two things together, but you know, we, you know, we're in the midst of of this quiet quitting thing that you hear, quiet quitting revolution that we talk about, we hear a lot about, there's high levels of, I mean, disengagement or unengagement. I can't speak English today, but you know, people are highly not engaged in their work. Part of that's our fault as leaders, I think. But I mean, to me, this is about this is for 2p this is for two audiences. This is for the people who have quit and who don't like what they're doing, they don't love the lot the life that they have, they have, they, they and they they're searching for that, their thing. They're searching for what's going to give them that fulfillment. And the other audience for this book, I think, is for our leaders. But I want to ask, you know, how do we we're asking people to do more with less. We're asking people to work, to manage remote working. We're asking people to manage and do more. How do we how do we do that effectively? And know, you talk about this in the book, you used examples of Disney and Amazon, Starbucks, you know, cutting cutting staff. But how do we manage with less? Because I think we, we're all trying to do that, and I don't think we're doing it very well. I guess that was my point. Is we're failing as leaders to manage with with less. We're not doing our people a great service, and I think that's why people are not engaged in the work. How do we fix all that? I mean to me, it's just it's messy. I you know you and I both work in companies where coaches and I just see messes every day that I go into these companies, and there's just, it's hard to even know where to begin sometimes, on how to work in some of this, how do we do it? And you said, this is a guide for that. Yeah, it's, it's a guide. I think, you know, you framed it really well. From my standpoint, you've got just using the employee, employer side of this, or the leader, follower, you know. I mean, you've got people who are struggling, they're struggling, and they're looking at, maybe I'm doing more with less. I'm tired, I'm stressed, and how do I get through this? So, so there's, how am I going to see this? How am I going to, you know, how am I going to grow? How am I going to lead? How many? How am I gonna, you know, get the types of things that I really want to have in life, and then what's the role of the leader, you know, and, and, you know, am I creating as a leader, the culture that's going to bring out the best in people? Do I even see that? Do I think about it? Because, you know, this is a really, you know, someone can look at this. A leader could look at this and say, gosh, you know, this is really hard. In fact, I talked to many CEOs who will say this is the hardest period of time I've ever had to leave. You know, it was easy when I had people back in one place, but now I've got some people remote, and I've got some people in the office, and they're in the office and Tuesdays and Thursdays, but they're not there they you know. Okay, so what does taking command mean? Taking command means what's the kind of culture that you want to create? Um. Um, you know, what are the values of the organization? Do you want to have people who are fired up about working for your company? How do you how do you build that? So it starts with, you know, do I, do I respect? Do I, you know, respect and appreciate and bring out the best in people? You know, there's the analogy of a workplace in many ways, like, like a greenhouse. You know, do you have a greenhouse being a place that's conducive for growing plants? You know, have I created a workplace that's conducive for bringing the best out in other people? So, so, you know, it starts with saying, What do I want? And then how do I model that? And how do I, you know, as the leader? And, you know, Rhett, you and I both have a really good friend and Alan Mulally, who is, I think, one of the greatest leaders of our time. And Alan had said to me, you know, all starts with the leader. Leader has to have zero tolerance for people who violate the culture so, so taking command starts with leadership, and it's not about excuses. It's not about blaming my people. I've got the worst people. I've got people No, what can I do? You know, what's my role? And on the other side, the the employee says, Well, gosh, this is so hard, I'm working, but where's the opportunity? Because, I mean, really, if I've got, if I got the mindset people, there are people who are getting promoted every day. There are people who are getting the job, dream jobs every day. Why is it that they are it's partly because they've got the right mindset and they're willing to do what it takes to put the work behind that mindset and make it happen. So, you know, everything in my mind starts with that mindset. It starts with our thoughts and how we see things and how we frame things, and then how we back that up by the actions and the skills that we have.

Cynthia Johnson: 16:41

Yeah, you know it, it's very obvious that all the problems start at the top until you're at the top right, and then it's like the other way around. What about employees trying to manage up with limited resources? You know? How does, how do you do that?

Unknown: 17:03

Well, so, you know, the number one question I used to get when I'm giving a conversation about, say, culture, say or say psychological safety, right? And let me just back up. I, I was in Japan not long before the pandemic, and I was talking to the CEO of a major, major company who said, you know, I have the most brilliant software engineers in Japan here, but many people are afraid to speak up because they're concerned about how it would affect their career. And how do I get them to do that? And that's, I think, a challenge that all leaders face, which is, how do I get my team members, the people in my company, to be to be comfortable speaking up to share their ideas. I want an innovative company. I want an agile company. I want a resilient company. But do people feel psychologically safe, you know, so, so as a leader, do I create that environment then? But the number one question I get when I give a talk like that, from from people is, hey, look, I I don't have any direct reports. I'm just a person here. What? What can I do? Well, the answer is, you can do everything you can to create the environment that you want. You know, so are you someone who is you know, you're in a meeting, and think about the time that you're in a meeting and someone had an idea and society's the worst idea that's never going to work. Well. I mean, that's that person is creating a cultural impact in terms of how, whether people are willing to speak up, and the leader, if they allow that to happen, is allowing that to be part of the culture. So I know of teams, small teams, that have gotten together and said, Let's be kind of the light in the company for the kind of culture we want to have. And they start to have this impact. And people say, Wow, what are you doing? So, so the answer is, I think, you know, yes, I've got limited resources. Yes, I'm struggling. I'm going to do the very best I can. I'm going to communicate, but, you know, I'm going to think about, what can I do? And by the way, if the environment's not the right one for me, because I have to have boundaries, and maybe it's a toxic environment, then, then this is where I might say, You know what? I'm not gonna be that disengaged person who's just complaining all the time. I'm gonna just go find the right opportunity for me. So that's kind of how I see it. Well, that's the courageousness that you're talking about, right? That's the courageous part I think talk about in You talked a lot about in the book, about intentional at work, and I, and I, what I, what you were saying in that is, is that, you know, you have to have your values aligned, in alignment, and that is so hard. I, you know, I work with companies all the time, and I see, I see that that where that doesn't or that's not happening, right? It's not that easy for companies to get that part right, because I do believe that values, you know, our values, should drive our focus. They should drive our our. Our decision making. When times get tough, you fall back on your values to make those tough decisions. And why do we Why do we miss that? Why do we mess that up so often as leaders? Because I think that is so critical. I think it's the biggest, one of the biggest takeaways, really, you're saying people either who haven't defined their values or people who find themselves compromising their values, both, I mean compromised and their values at work, I mean their personal values aren't in sync with what the company stated values are, right? And I do this exercise when I go into companies, and we do values work, and I we do the company values, and then we do the personal values. And it's it's surprising to me that often in the company leadership, the personal values often aren't in sync with the company values, and to me, that leads to a lot of tough conversations, and it's one of the reasons for unhappiness, and that, that engagement that we're talking about. I don't know if that question makes any sense. I'm rambling. I feel like, but it but, but values is so important, and I think we get it wrong a lot of times. Yeah, well, I mean, I think part of it is, you know, how does the company do and articulating its values? And then, you know, Am I honest about whether or not I'm aligned to those values, because you're absolutely right, right where there is that kind of disalignment that creates tension, unhappiness, frustration, trust, but often with issues. When you trust issues you know, but often you know, there are different ways that a person, an employee, might be able to handle that. I mean, one is and because, and people are often afraid. And I think fear is the thing we talk a lot about that in part one of the book, you know, and I like, this is quote, I'm not even sure who said this, but everything we want on the other side of fear, right? So, so everything we wants on the other side of fear, and yet, we're often afraid to cross that. So, you know, I say to myself, I look at the company, I'm like, gosh, you know, these values, or this person said this, and this person, my boss, is acting this way, you know, but we make assumptions. Why not? You know, at least first have the conversation. Hey, I'm just curious about some of the values that I see here. You know, I know you love this company, and I love this company. I want to see this company succeed and thrive, and I want to be a big part of making that happen. You know, I'm a little concerned, because I saw this and this and this. How can we reconcile that? Or, you know, but, but just, is there a willingness to even have that conversation? That's part of, you know, so what's the employee's responsibility in taking command? And, you know, ultimately, if it is a place where the values are misaligned. People are often afraid to leave. They're afraid and then we've got, you know what's, what's the rowing analogy. If you've got 10 people rowing on a boat, you got two people rowing forward, you've got two people rowing the other way, and you got the other people. It's kind of in the middle. We don't want people who are rowing the other way. It's like, okay, look, if I'm unhappy here, part taken in is, what is this is my future. What? What's the vision I have for myself? Do I want to see myself in a company where I'm miserable for 20 years? No, I mean, part of the reason I left the practice of law, I think I was a successful lawyer, but not a happy lawyer. I know many people who stay in the practice of law for 40 years, not particularly happy. That's not a great way to live if you're happy, and it's certainly it's a great it's a great way to make a living, and it's a great thing to do if it's the right, if there's alignment. So But ultimately, you know, what's your vision for yourself? What are your values? And starting with those kinds of questions, it's really, really important, and that's what, that's what you mean by being intentional, right? 100% Yeah, I think a lot of times, you know, the other thing, you know, rut Cynthia, that's interesting to me is just how quickly time goes by, right? You know, it's like, it's, I mean, here we're going into June. It seems like it was just January. I just turned 55 last week. I'm like, Oh my gosh, you know, I can't believe I mean, that was fast, you know. But if we're not intentional, and we don't stop and say, What do I want and what am I committing? Committed to work, work toward myself, I might find 10 years have gone by, you know, and we see people get to these points of crisis in their life where they're like, gosh, you know, what's it all about? Don't get to that point. Take action if you're in a job that you don't like, break from work to bring about change in the job. If you can't bring about change in the job, maybe it's find something else. Maybe it's start your own thing. But, you know, but we have to start first by taking command of our thoughts and our emotions, those things within ourselves that hold ourselves, hold us back. If we do that, then we can advance and take command of our relationships and take command of our futures. Yeah,

Cynthia Johnson: 24:54

it's, uh, it's really powerful to hear that, because you do hear it a lot. My perspective, you hear it a lot when you haven't gone all the way to the career level of something, right? You're like, just quit or try something new. But once you've hit that, that that sort of career marker moment, it's, it's people take the other direction. Look how far you've come, just keep going like, you'll make, you know, just like, make it where like is. How do you find the right person? Because, you know, a lot of this has got to be feedback based. Where do you find the right person, the right coach, the right sounding board to help you decide if it's a quitting situation or something to power through?

Unknown: 25:41

Yeah. So finding good mentors is vital, and we do talk about that in the book, about really creating a I don't want to call it a network. It's a community. It's a community of people who might be aligned around your values. And really it's supporting other people, and it's people supporting you. It's working together. You know, red again, you are from El Malay talks about working together, but my experience is that we talked about this, is that mentors are all around us. They're always people who are willing to help, if we're willing even to ask, I mean identifying someone who has been successful or some that we respect, and just saying, hey, you know, do you want to kind of, can we talk? And sitting down, whether it's a coffee or a zoom or whatever it is, and just having that conversation. Hey, Cynthia, you know, you're someone to really respect, and I really appreciate how you've been able to achieve ABC indeed, you might ask some questions about that. In my experience that I've had mentors throughout my entire career, you know, I can't think of anyone who's ever said, No, I'm not, not willing to talk to you, or I'm not willing to help you. And in fact, people I've asked me many times, it's the same thing. It's like, we want to pay it forward. So, you know, I think, but what? What holds us back? You know, I remember someone that invited me to be on her podcast, and she said, You know, I was really afraid to ask you to be in my podcast, like, Well, I'm glad she did. I said, Well, I'm delighted to be in your podcast, you know. But, we might not approach someone. We might say, Well, gosh, I couldn't ask Cynthia to be my mentor. I couldn't ask Cynthia to meet me for coffee to to give some advice. Why not? What's the worst that's going to happen Cynthia? Cynthia says, No, I'm too busy. I can't Okay, no problem, you know. But the other thing is, you know, frankly, finding people is a really important part of it, but what about ourselves? Because often it's the things we say to ourselves and the way that we talk to ourselves that really is just vicious. Sometimes we say things to ourselves that we would never say to anyone else. We think things like, oh, there's no way I could do this. I'm horrible. So part of in the first part of the book, we talk about this, taking command of your thoughts, paying attention to them, conditioning your mind for success, you know? How do we build a mindset that supports me? So I've got to support myself, and then I've got relationships, people are going to work with me, you know, but I need to be able to have that confidence myself. How do I develop that confidence? How do I develop that inner courage? How do I develop that resilience? And we can all do it. Every one of us can do it, if we know how, and if we're willing to take the steps. Well, I'm writing a book on self talk right now, so I am going to send you a copy, because I'd love for you to read and get your take on it, because, you know, it is, it is so critical, I'd love to see that that's great. The sort of the final question. And I hate to wrap it up, because I've got a I'm sure we we could go on and on. The importance of listening. I feel like we often love to hear ourselves talk, and we often when we're having a conversation with with a person we we're thinking about the next thing that we're going to say and not really listening, and we're not asking enough questions. And I know sometimes we feel like maybe we don't want to ask the boss a tough question, or seem like we're being critical or but we often do that at the cost of not getting what we need right. What are there some strategies or ways that we can do that that are non threatening, that that give us the license to give us a way to to ask these tough questions in a in a better way or a way that's not going to endanger us or threaten, threaten, you know, because I think that's what we do. It often out of fear, right, right? We don't ask that question because we're afraid we're going to make somebody upset. Yeah, and that's a real fear. And most people, most of us, want to avoid conflict, particularly if it's with our boss. So that's, that's an understandable kind of thing. You know, one of the things we teach X, I've got this little list Golden Book that we have in Dale Carnegie, which is a it's a list of Dale Carnegie strategies for how do you how do you interact with people, and how do you have tough conversations? We think, we believe you can say almost anything if you know how to say it. You know. And part of this is it's building trust, but it's also it's beginning in a friendly. Way, if I'm talking to you, Rhett, and you're my boss, you know, and talking in terms of your interests, you know? So it's, Hey, Rhett, you know, I you know, one thing, it's, I know is really important to you, is A, B, C and D, you know, would it be valuable if I had some thoughts to talk to you about that? Would you want to hear those thoughts? Yeah, I'd like, yes. Would it be okay, you know, I mean, so part of it is talking in terms of the other person's interests, and really assuming positive intent. I think is a big part too. We often assume negative intent about other people, even when we don't know, and that also contributes to the fear, but, but I think that's, that's, it's a big way to, you know, to do it. It's not to accuse it's to give someone a benefit the doubt. Is to ask questions. It's as exactly said rest, to listen, you know, to someone, what someone has said. And it's my experience. You can, you can have very, very tough conversations if you, if you are constructive and honest, and you come with the right heart, and having that conversation, it doesn't mean they're all, Oh, it doesn't. Doesn't mean they're always going to go well, right? I mean, but you can, you can have them, and that's the most important part. Because again, in my experience, you know, so many conversations that I might have been hesitant to have actually went way better than I thought, and that's one of the things that is, I think, true for many of us, and it's such a relief after having it too, right? Yeah, totally, because you build up that anxiety about that conversation, and it's often those, those those self deprecate, or those self self talk that's really getting in the way of that, but you're right. I'm looking forward to reading your book on self talk. It's exactly right, because we will tell ourselves, I could never have that conversation with Cynthia or with Ron. I could never well, why? Why are we saying that? I mean, instead of saying, you know, could I do it? It's in what ways could it? What would I have to do to do this? You know, it's asking the right questions, and I like the way you frame it, right? You're doing it. You have that conversation based on their interest, right? You try to frame the conversation that is positive for them, but you still need right? That's exactly right. If I, if I know you and I can say, you know, and I'm what's important to Rhett here, you know, I'm not going to, if I come and just sit and say, Look, this is important to me, and I want to talk to you about it. I mean, you're going to go like this, you can, I mean, so you're going to get, I mean, it puts people on the defensive. So don't put people on the defensive. Just, you know, come at it and, you know. So again, Rhett, I know this is important. Is this is it? How important is it to you that we do this as a business? Very important. What are some of the reasons why it's important? I mean, you know, get him talking and that type of thing, right?

Cynthia Johnson: 32:54

No, I love, yeah. That's, uh, that's such a better way to do it. Just thinking of the moments I'm like, you know, going into it, it's like, I can't stand another minute unless I have this conversation. Like, no one wants to enter that, that space in that room. It's, uh, no, I'm, yeah, you've, uh, I've feel very seen. Thank you. Thank you for today. Um, yeah, no, really. Thank you for being here. This is a was a amazing conversation, and I guess I'm going to go back and reread like, you know, yours, and then also how to influence people, because it clearly had a huge influence on your life, and it's how to show up in the world. I think you're a really incredible case study on that. Maybe someone will write that book one day.

Unknown: 33:45

Oh, well, thank you, Cynthia. I appreciate that. Just on your point how to win and influence people as a masterpiece. And people have said to me, it's like, what do I do after I read take command? And I really hope that take Command's gonna have a huge impact on people in the world. It's based on Dale Carnegie's principles, which are super sound, proven over time, but yeah, I mean, I My hope is that people will go back, go back and read How to Win Friends and Influence People. Read How to Stop Worrying and start living. Take a Dale Carnegie course. I mean, frankly, if I hadn't taken that Dale Carnegie course, and you think about the pivot points in your life, the way your life can turn on a dime. You know, you see yourself not going to do that. Oh my gosh. You know, my entire life changed. And if you can google Warren Buffett, he says the same thing. If you Warren Buffett, Dale Carnegie took a Dale Carnegie, course, entire life changed. So it's, it's pretty incredible what can happen when we do take action, and when we do the things that we think are the right things. Well, the book is called Take command. I'm guessing you can get it on Amazon and all the places you get good books and and thank you so much, Joe, thank you, Rhett, thank you Cynthia, great to be with you both.

Cynthia Johnson: 35:00

You as well. And thank you everyone for watching. We are bestseller TV. We will be back next week with another episode. Enjoy the rest of your day. You.