From Seeking Approval to Celebrating Self-Worth

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Discover the keys to unlocking your Mojo Mastery as we dive into the sacred art of self-love and acceptance. I'm Steph, your Mojo Maven, guiding you through an odyssey of embracing your true worth with our empowering mantra of the week. We unravel the intricacies of forging a profound connection with the self, highlighting the undeniable impact this relationship has on our interactions with the world. As we confront the hurdles of external validation, I invite you on a journey that celebrates our beautifully imperfect selves, encouraging a shift from seeking others' approval to basking in the glow of our own.

This episode is a treasure trove of wisdom for those on the path to becoming a Mojo Master. I'll share personal reflections and actionable steps to deepen your self-love practice, and I encourage you to share your transformative experiences with our community on Instagram. Looking ahead, we'll explore how to infuse harmony into our relationships and cast aside the drama that no longer serves us. Join me in this expedition of nurturing a kind-hearted, non-judgmental mindset as we collectively uplift each other to a life resplendent with self-compassion and joy.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:10

Welcome to your new favorite podcast, pocketful of Mojo, where you're you and I'm Steph, and we tune in here to tab into some mojo. You see, I think I've cracked the code to being happy. I'm happy every single day. No jokes, no brag. Now, look, I wasn't always this way Trust and believe. I've had breakdowns on multiple continents, but by paying attention and living with more intention, I've created this wellness first aid kit full of amazing tools that help me out of and avoid getting into life's most sticky and stressful situations. And I'm not here to gatekeep, so settle in. We're here for some positive change. So let's explore together where your mojo meets the road. So let's explore together where your mojo meets the road. In today's episode, I'm going to review our mantra for the week and then we're going to dig into today's main topic, and that is self-acceptance. And I know, look, you've got a leavened bajillion podcasts to choose from, so I'm super grateful that you're here. So please stick around. And I'm going to super grateful that you're here. So please stick around, and I'm going to make sure that you're glad you did.

Speaker 1: 1:29

Let's get started with today's mantra and get tuned in, tapped in and turned on. Hello, beautiful, and welcome to the 16th episode of Pocketful of Mojo. Once again, I'm Steph, nice to meet you. I'm your hostess and your Mojo Maven, and I'm super pumped that you're here, and today is going to be a very soulful episode, so let's get right to it. Let's start by digging into today's mantra, and that is I choose a life of self-love and self-acceptance. Okay, friends, this mantra is not messing around, so let's break it down, shall we? I choose a life of self-love and self-acceptance. Choices we are born with a brain in our beautiful little heads and it's up to us to use it. The relationship that we have with ourselves is up to us. From here on out, I want you to remember your power and your ultimate responsibility when it comes to the choices you make. I choose a life of self-love and self-acceptance. I mean, how lovely does that sound? What would that look like for you? How would your life be different? How would you show up differently for yourself? What would you have to let go of on the path to self-love and self-acceptance? A few journal prompts for you there.

Speaker 1: 3:02

I choose a life of self-love and self-acceptance. Self-love and self-acceptance are the foundation for a life well-lived, in my opinion. When I look out into the world and I see the hate, the division, the intolerance, the disconnection. I have to wonder do those people who spout the hate and the division, do they love themselves? Have they done this work? Do they need to maybe listen to my podcast? Because when you're rooted in self-love, you're on solid ground to be able to go out into the world and bring light and love. But it starts with you, and when you're questioning this world and all its chaos and insanity, just remember that the only person you're responsible for is you. You get to make the choice to put love above all else, and it begins and ends with you.

Speaker 1: 3:56

I choose a life of self-love and self-acceptance. This is a lifelong gem of a mantra. It anchors us in love and allows us to love every part of us the bumps, the bruises, the mistakes, the triumphs, the highs, the lows. The point is to love all of it, to accept all of it. We are all works in progress, and loving all of what makes you you is what self-love and self-acceptance is all about, and when we are able to love our flaws, our mistakes and the things that maybe traditionally we'd like to ignore or fix about ourselves, we're able to go out into the world with a little more compassion, a little less judginess and a lot more understanding that we're all on this rock, blazing through space together, and maybe there's room for acceptance when we come across something or someone that's a little hard to love. It's a much more peaceful place to live from my friends. So keep this mantra close. It will make a difference to you and for the world that we live in. I choose a life of self love and self acceptance. Whew, that was a doozy.

Speaker 1: 5:16

So let's continue on this train of thought and look at today's topic, which is how to embrace your own approval. Let's start by taking a moment to collectively sigh in the ongoing frustration of always seeking that elusive approval from other people. Shall we from other people, shall we? I mean seriously, the struggle is real the things that we do right, like at home and at work. Heck, I even want flight attendants to love me. So when I fly, I'm one of those nerds that takes out the safety card and pays attention and makes serious eye contact with a flight attendant when they're doing their presentation, because I just want them to know I'm a good traveler. I want a gold star at the grocery store for how clever I was for putting the items on the conveyor belt. Lame. But here's the good news it doesn't have to stay that way, because today we're diving deep into the wonderful world of approval and acceptance.

Speaker 1: 6:15

And, as people pleasers, we love approval and acceptance. Approval and acceptance. And, as people pleasers, we love approval and acceptance. But, plot twist, now it all starts with you. Buckle up, buttercup. Because here we go, because you're a bit of a people pleaser too. Eh Well, welcome to the club. We know the drill we bend over backward, we tune into other people before checking in with ourselves. You're an expert at shelving your own needs and desires just to earn a nod of approval from other people Can be a little exhausting, right. But here's the thing Chasing after outside validation is like trying to catch a greased up pig at a country. Fair, slippery, downright impossible A fool's errand if you will. Fair, slippery, downright impossible. A fool's errand if you will. So we're going to get real for a moment.

Speaker 1: 7:01

Why do we crave approval and acceptance from others so much? Well, it's human nature. We all want to feel loved, valued, respected, and I personally believe that we're all worthy of that fundamentally. But somewhere along the way we get caught up in this vicious cycle of seeking validation from everyone else. Maybe it started when we were kids and it wove itself into how we were raised. Any of this sound familiar? Because what I really want you to hear is this there is no amount of outside validation that will ever fill that void inside if you don't learn to accept and approve of yourself first. See how I spoke slowly, so you'd really get that, because I mean, really, we don't have to look very far to validate that statement. Just ask the celebrities with millions of adoring fans who still feel insecure and lack self-assurance. Ask the millionaires who, despite outward appearances and seem to have it all, they still struggle with relationships and try to buy their way into happiness.

Speaker 1: 8:06

Cue the light bulb moment. It's time we gotta flip the script and start giving yourself the love and acceptance that you so desperately seek from other people. But how you ask? Well, my dear friend, that's where the magic of self-acceptance comes into play. It's all about loving who you are, flaws and all, and recognizing, knowing and believing that you are worthy of love and approval, exactly how you are. Radical idea, right. So let's break it down. Let's take a practical look at how you get from where you are now to where you're going, which is, of course, mojo Town, and you're the mayor, where you love and accept yourself in all your gorgeousness.

Speaker 1: 8:54

Let's start at the top Step one. It's time to acknowledge your feelings Yep, all of them, the good, the bad and the ugly. I want you to stare them in the face and really give them a good look. Give yourself permission to feel whatever it is that you're feeling, without judgment, without shame. Trust me, it is so liberating. Whatever that feeling is, it simply is what it is. And this is going to feel different and take some real intentional thinking. The key here is that you need to give yourself express permission to do so. And how do you do that? Well, you say to yourself self I give you permission to feel whatever it is you want to feel. Say it to yourself, and there's your contract with yourself. It's up to you to honor it.

Speaker 1: 9:46

When I came home back to Canada after my mom died, I was in survival mode, with a heavy garnish of grief. My marriage had also just ended and I was very overwhelmed with, well, all the feelings really, and in my state of exhaustion and crippling anxiety and sadness, I decided that part of my recovery was a prescription to feel. Feel the feelings, sit with them, name them, observe them, surrender to them. If I felt tired, I slept. If I felt sad, I cried. And then I cried some more and what do you know? The crying eventually stopped, despite how it felt in the moment. If I felt lazy, I would laze. Now this came with its own battle of unlearning my usual route, which was to be in my head about all the things I wasn't doing whilst indulging in all my own feelings. But then you know what? I let that shit go Because I'd given myself permission to feel that permission slip was worth its weight.

Speaker 1: 10:54

And when you do this, you will find yourself not only honoring your own reality and pro tip, no one can do this for you but you're actively processing your truth. There's no getting over something. You have to go through it, because the alternative is ignoring and powering through until that whisper turns into a scream and then you really have to deal with it. Look, babe, there's nothing wrong with anything you're feeling ever, so honor yourself by observing and accepting whatever it is that you're feeling. When you get stuck, just remember this great adage there is no good, there is no bad, there just is. I want you to hear that again, there is no good. There is no bad, there just is.

Speaker 1: 11:44

Let's stop attaching judgment to our feelings and just let them be. Sure, it's a bit existential, but that's a little bit. But why? You're here, right? Plus, as an extra added bonus, just think of all the free time you're going to have when you're not busy judging yourself, because next up we're going to talk about those pesky inner critics. You know the voices in your head that constantly whisper sweet nothings like you're not good enough. And who do you think you are? Yeah, those guys. Yeah, it's time to show them the door, politely. Of course, we're going to replace those negative thoughts with affirmations that celebrate how worthy and amazing and exceptional you are. Repeat after me I am enough, I am worthy and I approve of myself.

Speaker 1: 12:31

Now here's where the real fun begins Self-care. Oh yeah, we're taking bubble baths, we're taking long walks in nature, we're indulging in our favorite hobbies, whatever fills your cup, whatever nourishes your soul. Read that book, play that guitar, treat yourself like the VIP that you are because, let's face it, you deserve it and, if I'm right, it's probably overdue. But wait, there's more. Remember those exercises I promised? Well, here's one for you. Grab a journal and write down three things that you love about yourself every single day. It could be anything Three things that you love about yourself every single day. It could be anything From your killer sense of humor to your amazing dance moves. The key is to focus on the positive and celebrate and get intimate with your awesomeness. Another fun exercise take yourself on a date. That's right, you heard me. Treat yourself to a solo adventure, whether it's trying out a new restaurant, catching a movie or maybe just a leisurely stroll through the park. Enjoy the freedom, enjoy your own company and have some fun in the joy of self-discovery.

Speaker 1: 13:40

I'll never forget the first time I did this. I was living in Montreal and I had just moved there for work, and the only other person that I knew was an ex boyfriend Gross right. So I gave myself a mission to find the best cup of coffee in Montreal, and there were lots of bad cups of coffee. So this is a longer story than that. But on my days off I would spend the time getting dressed up. That would be my self-care, and I put on my favorite tunes so that I had my mind right and I could get my strut on and I would set myself loose in the super cool city and search for the perfect cup. And when I closed my eyes, I can picture the moment where all my self-doubt and all my insecurities and all the unknowns they all just melted away. My self-doubt and all my insecurities and all the unknowns they all just melted away and I was in my groove. Boom Mojo, I felt it. I had the strut. I had this feeling of empowerment for doing this on my own Wind, in my back. It was just this great feeling that this was my cool life and I did this.

Speaker 1: 14:47

Now I won't sugarcoat it. This journey to self-acceptance won't always be smooth sailing. There are bumps in the road, moments of doubt and maybe even a few setbacks along the way, but guess what? That's all part of it and you'll see them coming. So you're not going to get sidelined or surprised. Just take the time you need to rest, breathe and reboot.

Speaker 1: 15:10

This is my invitation for you to really enjoy this adventure, my friend, because every single stumble it's just a stepping stone to who you're becoming and you're really on the path to remembering who you are. So to all my fellow people, pleasers out there, I want to leave you with this. So to all my fellow people, pleasers out there, I want to leave you with this. It's time to break free from the shackles of our outer validation and get ready for the power that comes with self-acceptance, because you are worthy, you are enough and you, my dear friend, are absolutely deserving of your own approval. And if none of this works, may I just suggest putting on Chaka Khan's I'm Every Woman on your stereo as loud as you can, because I know for me fills my bucket every damn time. Now go forth and conquer you, magnificent human being. The world is ours for the taking One self-approved, intentional, self-loving step at a time.

Speaker 1: 16:08

Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. Remember, self-love and self-acceptance are the foundation for a Mojo Master, and I know that you have everything that you need to start this adventure and level up your self-love life. Be sure to find me on Insta and let me know how you're coming along with your self-acceptance adventure, and you can find my handle and a few fun links in the show notes. So be sure to check that out. Come back next time where we explore finding harmony in relationships, and say sayonara to Dramarama. So until then, stay fabulous, keep spreading those positive vibes, be kind out there, take care, my lovelies, toodle-oo kangaroo.