EP 3: You Are In Last Place! Stop Putting Others Before Yourself.
Mar 29, 2024
Isai
Are you tired of being a people-pleaser and conforming to trends that don't really resonate with you?
It's time to put yourself first and make decisions that truly align with your own joy! In this episode we are deeply exploring the importance of self-care, the power of self-confidence, and why saying 'no' when you don't want to do something could be a form of self-love. I’m teaching y’all how to communicate your needs effectively and stay true to your mission, goals, and plans without fear of judgment.
Remember, saying 'yes' to yourself has the power to change everything in your life.
Thank you for listening to "This Is Some Crazy Sh*T" with Cheron Hamner.
Are you tired of being a people-pleaser and conforming to trends that don't really resonate with you?
It's time to put yourself first and make decisions that truly align with your own joy! In this episode we are deeply exploring the importance of self-care, the power of self-confidence, and why saying 'no' when you don't want to do something could be a form of self-love. I’m teaching y’all how to communicate your needs effectively and stay true to your mission, goals, and plans without fear of judgment.
Remember, saying 'yes' to yourself has the power to change everything in your life.
Thank you for listening to "This Is Some Crazy Sh*T" with Cheron Hamner.
You are listening to. This Is Some Crazy Shit. With Sharon Hamner. This podcast is for you if you are tired of living day to day feeling unfulfilled, you are frustrated and you are doing too much with no return. This is for you if you are ready to take charge of your life, if you are ready to let go of managing other people's insecurities and their expectations and live life your way. Here we have dope conversations about saving yourself, so we can get off these street corners and stop waiting for Captain Saviour Ho. You ready? Let's go, because this is some crazy shit.
Speaker 1:
I am not okay with this idea that, as women, we should sacrifice everything for the sake of everyone around us. It's not cool at all. I don't understand where this concept of being the sacrificial lamb came from, because if we are not able to take care of ourselves first, then who is going to take care of us after we are done taking care of everybody else around us? I am a lover of sports and let me just tell you everybody remembers who won the Super Bowl, but can anybody tell you who the second place team is? No, because there's no trophy for that. And I'm here to say if you are not putting yourself first in your life. Then you are in last place and nobody is around to help you. So what I want to encourage you is to consider putting yourself first.
Speaker 1:
I had to challenge myself with this very same thought just the other day. I was at work, behind the chair, in the middle of doing someone's hair, and I began to feel very woozy and I was challenged with the thought of okay, well, okay, what do I need to do to finish her hair? What should I do? Should I go to the hospital? How am I going to get there? Do I need to wait to have somebody drive me? Do I need to call an ambulance? And the majority of the conversation that I was going back and forth in my head about was how I was going to take care of these people that I was committed to, that were on my schedule, versus how I was going to take care of myself, and that was very eye-opening, a huge wake-up call. I made the decision to just cut my day right then and there and go see about myself.
Speaker 1:
In the going scene about myself, I was with my daughter. She had given me a ride to the emergency room. She found herself complaining because she had the things that she needed to do and she was ready to boast on her mom. That was eye-opening, because that just confirmed what I was thinking that you have to make sure that you take care of yourself. Of course, you have family and friends that are held, but everybody has their own thing going on. It's so important for you to have your own thing going on. With having your own thing going on, it's okay, and I'm going to give you permission to say no, period. If someone asks you to do something that you don't have time to do, you don't have a desire to do, just say no. It doesn't require explaining, which is why I stop after I say no so many times.
Speaker 1:
As women, we feel like we need to explain ourselves to people and we don't. The thing that we need to do is just stay true to our mission and our goal and our plans. It's okay to say no. It's going to probably take some practice in saying no, because we're so used to saying yes to everything. Should I say?
Speaker 1:
People pleasing yes, people pleasing. I realized that I was a people pleaser and that was shocking to myself. You might think well, I'm not just going around just being a yes person all the time jumping because this person says let's do this. Doing that. A lot of times we are people pleasing just to stay in a status quo. We are people pleasing by wearing certain clothes. We are people pleasing by wearing our hair a certain way when we don't feel confident in that look.
Speaker 1:
I'm just going to stop right there and just talk about this natural hair movement that everybody feels like everybody should be doing it. I'm here to say if you're not feeling yourself with natural hair, then don't do it. I'm a hairstylist that I work with clients who have non-relaxed hair. I do relaxers and I do what's called a keratin treatment, which changes the game for so many of the women who sit in my chair, because it allows them the ability to flex between curly hair and straight hair, and that's great if that's what they want to do. And I want to encourage you like just be about what makes you feel good versus what everybody else is doing. The trends don't matter all the time.
Speaker 1:
The trend to me is confidence, and when you have confidence, then you can have the best life ever, you can have a great relationship, you can make the money that you want to make because you have confidence, you can go on trips by yourself and enjoy yourself because you have confidence. Go out like when was the last time you took yourself out on a date and went out for dinner? Come on now Like we got to be the people to take care of ourselves first, versus waiting on a man, a significant other or somebody to recognize us and do things for us. Because I'm going to tell you something that might surprise you. It is very hard to read minds out here in these streets and a lot of people don't really know what you want, because you haven't voiced that to anybody.
Speaker 1:
And the best voice that you can have is by doing and showing us how you love to treat yourself, not just for a special occasion, but on a regular basis.
Speaker 1:
Show us how you treat yourself, how you love yourself, how you put yourself first, and that's gonna gain respect from other people. You're gonna respect yourself because, hey, you took care of yourself, because nobody's coming to take care of you, nobody is coming to save you. It is your responsibility to take care of yourself and it's unfortunate that we weren't really given a guideline on how to take care of ourself, how to show ourself self-love, how to actually really love on ourselves. Nobody really showed you how to do that. A lot of people that you probably grew up around just showed you how to survive and get by versus being a woman who thrives, and I want that for you so bad. I want that for you, and when you get that, everything in your life is going to change, because you said yes to you and saying yes to you is just so, so good and delicious. Thank you, and these social media streets.
