Self Talk with Dr. Ray Self

Understanding the Gift of Compassion

March 21, 2024 Dr. Ray Self Season 165
Understanding the Gift of Compassion
Self Talk with Dr. Ray Self
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Self Talk with Dr. Ray Self
Understanding the Gift of Compassion
Mar 21, 2024 Season 165
Dr. Ray Self

Dr. Ray Self will discuss the gift of compassion, which happens to be one of the most misunderstood. In this show, he will explain what this gift is, what it is not, its strengths and weaknesses. Studies have shown that over 35% of the body of Christ has this gift. However, this gift is often misused and misunderstood. This show is significant for anyone who knows someone with the gift of compassion or has this gift themselves. 

Mat_12:7  "But if you had known what this means, 'I DESIRE COMPASSION, AND NOT A SACRIFICE,' you would not have condemned the innocent. 

The  International College of Ministry is now enrolling at www.icmcollege.org/enroll 

Click here to purchase Dr. Self's book – Hear His Voice, Be His Voice, or visit Amazon.com. 

Check out our new store at – www.icmcollege.org/merch  

Click here to purchase Dr. Self's book – Redeeming Your Past and Finding Your Promised Land, or visit Amazon.com. 

Follow and subscribe to Self Talk With Dr. Ray Self at our podcast website  - https://www.icmcollege.org/selftalk.  

 

Or our new podcast website at https://www.buzzsprout.com/2249804  

 

Help Dr. Self continue this show - partner at www.icmcollege.org/donate  

For show topic suggestions, email Dr. Ray Self at drrayself@gmail.com 

Enjoy free courses offered by the International College of Ministry Free Courses 

Show host bio - 

Dr. Ray Self founded Spirit Wind Ministries Inc. and the International College of Ministry. He holds a Doctorate in Christian Psychology and a Doctorate in Theology. He currently resides in Winter Park, Florida. He is married to Dr. Christie Self and has three sons and a daughter. 

Show Notes Transcript

Dr. Ray Self will discuss the gift of compassion, which happens to be one of the most misunderstood. In this show, he will explain what this gift is, what it is not, its strengths and weaknesses. Studies have shown that over 35% of the body of Christ has this gift. However, this gift is often misused and misunderstood. This show is significant for anyone who knows someone with the gift of compassion or has this gift themselves. 

Mat_12:7  "But if you had known what this means, 'I DESIRE COMPASSION, AND NOT A SACRIFICE,' you would not have condemned the innocent. 

The  International College of Ministry is now enrolling at www.icmcollege.org/enroll 

Click here to purchase Dr. Self's book – Hear His Voice, Be His Voice, or visit Amazon.com. 

Check out our new store at – www.icmcollege.org/merch  

Click here to purchase Dr. Self's book – Redeeming Your Past and Finding Your Promised Land, or visit Amazon.com. 

Follow and subscribe to Self Talk With Dr. Ray Self at our podcast website  - https://www.icmcollege.org/selftalk.  

 

Or our new podcast website at https://www.buzzsprout.com/2249804  

 

Help Dr. Self continue this show - partner at www.icmcollege.org/donate  

For show topic suggestions, email Dr. Ray Self at drrayself@gmail.com 

Enjoy free courses offered by the International College of Ministry Free Courses 

Show host bio - 

Dr. Ray Self founded Spirit Wind Ministries Inc. and the International College of Ministry. He holds a Doctorate in Christian Psychology and a Doctorate in Theology. He currently resides in Winter Park, Florida. He is married to Dr. Christie Self and has three sons and a daughter. 

Hey, welcome to my show. I'm Dr. Ray Self and we have a episode coming up. 165. A hundred and sixty-five episodes we've done. This show is going to be interesting. I'm going be talking more about the gift of compassion and the reason is because it's extremely important, you know somebody with this gift, and it has been misunderstood, misused, misapplied for so many years. But - and for so many people - but it's very important to understand I really thank you for being a part of this show and downloading this. Please share this with your friends and I appreciate you very much. This show is sponsored by the International College of Ministry, that… you can get there by going to icmcollege.org, a Holy Spirit-filled online seminary with scholarships, amen. You know God's calling you. Anyway, thank you for being a part of this show, and um, stay tuned. I hope for a very crucial episode for your life. God bless you.


[Music]


Well, thank you for being a part of Self Talk and downloading the show, and sharing it. I appreciate you very much so um, let's pray. Heavenly Father, thank you for each person listening to this show. I pray, Father, that your Holy Spirit would speak through me and speak to each person that's here. Open up our ears and our hearts and our spirits to receive what you have. In Jesus’ name. Amen. 


So folks. I've taught about spiritual gifts and motivational gifts for many, many years and there's been a lot of misunderstanding about it. I'm not claiming I'm the world's greatest expert on gifts but you know what, I've been doing it for a long time, and what I like to do is keep things clear, um, and, and, and applicable. Unfortunately, when it comes to spiritual gifts, people mix them up all the time. There are supernatural gifts in the Bible and the manifestation gifts, you know, words of knowledge, prophecy, discerning of spirits, miracles, tongues, interpretation of tongues, and these gifts are supernatural gifts. They're mentioned in 1 Corinthians 12. But there are motivational gifts which are natural gifts mentioned in Romans chapter, uh, Romans chapter 6 I believe it is, and it is the uh, called the motivational gifts. Now, these gifts are natural tendencies, and Romans– it talks about teaching, serving, administration, compassion, exhortation, these are natural God-given gifts. The most given gift of all is the gift of compassion. Studies have shown that this gift is given to over 35% of the body of Christ. 


But what is the gift of compassion? Why is it important and why is it so misunderstood? Jesus was moved by, by compassion. Listen to these scriptures that talk about our Savior, and I want you to understand how important this gift is, okay? In Matthew 9:13 Jesus said, “But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire compassion and not sacrifice.’ For I did not come to call the righteousness, but sinners.” Then you see in Matthew 9:36 “Seeing the people, He felt compassion for them because they were distressed and dispirited, like a sheep without a shepherd.” Um, Matthew 14:14 “And He went ashore and He saw a large crowd and He felt compassion for them and He healed them.” Amen. Matthew 15:32, “When Jesus called His disciples to Him and He said, ‘I feel compassion for the people because they remained with me for three days and have nothing to eat.’” The point is Jesus was continually moved or motivated by compassion. It's a very important gift. I like to call the gift of compassion the Heart of Christ and I, I really think it is. But what is this gift of compassion? What is it like? I want to give you some traits on this gift. 


If you have this gift, okay, you are tenderhearted. Well, maybe that's obvious. Tenderhearted, um, feel things very deeply. You can even feel a problem. Some people see a problem, want to look for a solution. People with the compassion gift not only see a problem but they feel a problem. People with the gift of compassion will even feel and sense other people's pain. People gi– with the gift of compassion are drawn to other people with the gift of compassion. People with the gift of compassion are drawn to the down and out and the unlikely and the overlooked. People with the gift of compassion love to show mercy, they love to give, they love to love. People with the gift of compassion have this tremendous reservoir of love in their heart, just waiting to pour it out. 


Now, also people with the gift of compassion, unfortunately, can be hurt very easily, Okay? And sometimes people with the gift of compassion can be misinterpreted. Some of the misinterpretations of this gift are, oh, you're just a doormat. That's completely wrong. 100% wrong. People with the gift of compassion are not doormats. A person with the gift of compassion chooses willfully to show mercy and they will show more mercy and grace than most people until, until they've had enough. Then when they've had enough, there's no more mercy. What separates them from people without the gift is somebody without the gift may not give a person a second chance but with the gift of compassion, you give people a chance, you, you trust people, you, you show mercy to them, you show kindness to them until they absolutely prove you wrong, okay? Then it, it's over. 


Now sometimes, uh, people with the gift of compassion um, are misinterpreted. You know, people think, well, they're just doormats, you know, they can just– people just step all over them. That's absolutely not true. People with the gift of compassion choose to give compassion. They're not pushovers, they're not. A matter of fact, typically they're very strong, very strong people because they feel so deeply and they can hurt so deeply because their heart is tender and it takes a lot of strength sometimes just to function with the amount of emotions and feelings that's within their heart. People with the gift of compassion can walk into a room and literally sense the atmosphere of the room. It's like they got this little antenna on their head and if the room is right and the presence of the Lord is in the room and there's peace in the room, the person with the gift of compassion senses it immediately. If there's something wrong in the atmosphere, something that's not right, not of God, the person with the gift of compassion will discern it. They will feel it. It's like they feel the atmosphere of the room. 


Another interesting thing about people with the gift of compassion is they can spot insincerity in a heartbeat. It's difficult to lie to or get away with lying to a person with the gift of compassion. When they have the gift of compassion, they just sense hypocrisy immediately. They sense somebody who's not being real or sincere. It's, you know, it's, it's just– you won't fool them at all. They know, they know if you're real, if you're sincere. And you know, unfortunately in the body of Christ there's a lot of people that to me play with Christianity but underneath it all, they're not as sincere, as transparent, or transparent as they need to be. A person with the gift of compassion can almost just see other people's heart. A person with a gift of compassion loves, loves, loves to love and they love to show mercy. 


Now, I mentioned earlier but a person with compassion, they feel so deeply and so strongly and the heart is so tender, when they are hurt or rejected or betrayed, the level of pain they feel is extreme and it takes them a little bit to get over it. Now, eventually, they will forgive because they hate conflict, it's another thing. But the level of pain that p– that they feel– see they're feelers and their heart feels. They feel the pain of, of the situation and it– like I said, rejection, betrayal, whatever. Relationship breakups… it's devastating to a person with compassion. Another interesting thing about a person with compassion, um, is that they're always drawn to like I said earlier, they're drawn to the unlikely, the overlooked, the down and out, okay? But they also cannot stand injustice. If it's unfair or not right, unjust, it just triggers the person with the gift of compassion. Cannot stand injustice. Like me, for instance. I don't like the injustice of abortion. I keep thinking, what about the baby? What about the baby? What rights does the baby have? You know, her body and her rights. What about the rights of the baby's body? You know? I– to me that's unjust, that's just me, now it's unjust. But if it's unfair or unjust, it's just– it just really overwhelms the person with compassion. 


Um, now there's some side effects; like when you take your medicine, there's side effects to gifts. One of the side effects to… possible side effects… You know, it's like taking your antibiotic. They list these possible side effects and most of them don't ever occur, but possible side effects with the gift of compassion is depression. People with the gift of compassion can be prone to depression because they feel the problem so deeply. You know, depression is a horrible sense of being overwhelmed, um, feeling like you're hopeless, overwhelmed. I often said, um, depression is like putting on a pair of glasses and everything becomes more negative than it actually is and everything looks more daunting than it actually is. People with uh, the gift of depression or with the gift of compassion can be prone to depression and because they feel so deeply, they can be prone to addictions. You know, addictions are painkillers, pain avoiders, that's what addictions are. And that's a trap that people with the gift of compassion, you have to watch out for. 


Now, the cool thing about this gift is - and I believe this very strongly - is this gift is known as the heart of Christ. I believe so many times if you have this gift, what you're actually feeling is what the Lord feels. You are feeling His heart and he when the Lord grieves or the Holy Spirit grieves, you grieve. It's the heart of Christ. It's a beautiful gift. Now, it's very important if you have this gift to release your burdens. Remember, His burden is easy, His yoke is light. And then Peter says, “Cast your burdens upon the Lord…” If you have this, this gift, it is critical that you pray a prayer like this: Lord, I feel this problem so much. I feel so much for my friend, John, who's hurting so bad. I feel— Lord… Lord, I release this to you. Lord, I give this to you. I trust you with this burden, Lord. Lord, I release this burden to you. 


That prayer of release is very important for people with the gift of compassion. It's also important for intercessors because if you don't release what you're feeling, you're, you're, you'll feel like you're walking around with 2,000 pounds on your shoulders. You're carrying so much because you feel so much. But the beautiful thing about this gift is this gift is love. It's God's love. It's a gift of mercy, it's a gift of uh, it's a gift that is needed so much in the world. How– I mean, to me compassion people are people who love with all their heart. And if you know someone with this gift, they have a beautiful heart. Now, remember, they, they can be wounded very easily and so sometimes when I'm ministering to people with the gift of compassion, I pray for the Lord to heal their heart. I pray for the Lord to heal any brokenness in their heart, any wounds in their heart. Sometimes as you're praying, you, it's like you get this spiritual picture of their heart and you see all the wounds and scars and, you know, damage done to their heart. And the Lord loves to restore our heart so we can give and love freely. Um, sometimes compassionate people, because they feel so deeply, they get wounded uh, frequently and they can withdraw which is not healthy. But the gift overall is a heart gift. It's a love gift. Jesus had this gift and Jesus was continually moved and motivated by compassion for people who were in distress, people were hurting, and then the ultimate gift when He gave His life. You know, He had compassion on us because we were going to hell, our sins had condemned us. He had so much compassion. He was willing to die for us. It's a beautiful, wonderful motivational gift and I– if you have this gift, you– I hope that this has maybe helped you understand more, you know, more what it is. It's a, it's the heart of Christ, it's the gift of love, it's the gift of um, it's it's the gift of, of mercy. And I gave you the wrong scripture reference. This gift is mentioned in Romans chapter 12, looking at uh, verses 6 through 8, okay? And my-- verse 8 mentions it very clearly. 


Now, now remember, this is not a spiritual gift, this is a motivational gift. It is a gift that is naturally yours. You were created with this gift and it is a beautiful, wonderful gift. And what I'm hoping that maybe I've been able to do with this show is help you understand this gift because when I was very young, you– I've had this gift my whole life. I thought something was wrong with me. I would feel so deeply and I would hurt so much, sometimes I thought something was wrong with me. But when the Lord began to teach me and show me this beautiful gift of compassion, that it was a gift from Him, that it was a strength from Him, it was God's heart, and I began to embrace the gift that God had created within me: the gift of compassion. And it changed my life. And it changed my life. 


If you're in a relationship with someone with the gift of compassion, you are a very blessed person. But maybe you just know someone with this gift and you've never understood why they're so sensitive. Well, they have the heart of Christ and they are very tender. They are very tender. But remember, be sincere with them because if you're insincere, they will pick it up in a heartbeat. 


Another little warning, uh, for the gift of compassion - people with this gift - is… people with the gift of compassion typically, you know, they love people and, and they show kindness and they're… say kind things, they do kind actions, uh, typically they're huggers. However, that can be misinterpreted by the opposite sex so be careful with your gift of compassion that it does not get misinterpreted that you are coming on to someone you should not be coming on to other than your spouse, amen. 


Anyway, it's a wonderful gift. It's called the heart of Christ and I hope this show has been a blessing to you and maybe brought some understanding of this gift. And so um, let's pray. Excuse me. Heavenly Father, I thank you, Lord, for those listening. And Father, for those with the gift of compassion, Lord, I ask you to bring healing to any wounds that they're– in their heart because I know they have felt a lot. And so Lord, I ask you to heal and restore hearts right now, of those listening to me. Even if you don't have the gift of compassion but you have a brokenhearted… Lord, a broken heart. The Lord said uh, in His, in Psalms, the Lord is near and dear to the brokenhearted. He's near to the brokenhearted. Lord, I thank you, Father, for the gift of compassion. I thank you for the gift of love. I thank you for the gift of mercy you showed us. And so, Father, for those listening with this gift, I pray, Father, they will have more understanding of how you created them. And, Father, for those without this gift, I pray we'll ask for this gift because we need it. We need it. Some of us struggle in this area and we need this gift, Father. This is how Jesus was moved and this is how we should be moved. And so Lord, I thank you for each person listening again to this show and I bless them. And Holy Spirit, touch them now in Jesus’ name. Amen. Amen. All right, thank you so much for listening. God bless you.


[Music]


Well, folks, that was episode 165 I hope it was a blessing to you and again, I want to repeat this that maybe compassion's not your, your strength but we all need it and we can pray for it, amen. If Jesus was motivated by it, we should be too. I thank you for listening to Self Talk with me, Dr. Ray Self. Check out the show website again at icmcollege.org/selftalk. Please recommend this show, share this show, make sure you have subscribed to us, and give us a rating, that really helps. You can do that on the website, it helps us, more people reach us. Again, thank you for listening to Self Talk with Dr. Ray Self. Be sure and check out our college, International College of Ministry. we're enrolling right now with associate's, bachelor's, master's, and doctorate programs in ministry, theology, and Christian counseling. If the Lord's called you, we can help you and you can work online on your own schedule. There's no pressure at all. You say, “Well, I'm not sure I can afford it.” Well, talk, talk to us about our hardship scholarship plan. Thanks again for listening to Self Talk with Dr. Ray Self and may the Lord richly bless you. Amen and amen.