Marketing & Mayhem
Feedback, Boundaries, & What If'ing All Over Yourself
The difference between trips - traveling - and vacation. We talk about what it feels like to learn at the speed we are learning (failing, flailing and winning) - somedays it feels like we are in a video game or whack a mole (and sometimes we’re the mole). In fact - Jenny throws out the funniest quote about this concept of imposter syndrome, “I’m what if-ing all over myself” … “I just what-if-ed everywhere”. But isn’t that exactly what imposter syndrome is? You tell yourself a story of failure - even though everything around you literally says you are capable.
The GRITTY GAL marketing website is launching soon - and we’ve fielded tons of questions about GRITTY and MAYHEM and how they live together. Y'all we cannot wait to share it with you! And in the meantime - join us as we talk about the idea of “analysis paralysis” and the concept or “over painting the picture”. Life will give you so many chances to quit … or even to dismiss other people achievements. And we talk about the idea of “freedom” as a business owner. After all - freedom is never free.
For more mayhem, be sure to follow us:
Insta @marketingandmayhem
YouTube @MarketingMayhemPod
And don't forget to leave us a 5 star review! Or message us to deep dive into your topic or just give us feedback!
Hosted by @raebecca.miller and @jennyfromthe843
The difference between trips - traveling - and vacation. We talk about what it feels like to learn at the speed we are learning (failing, flailing and winning) - somedays it feels like we are in a video game or whack a mole (and sometimes we’re the mole). In fact - Jenny throws out the funniest quote about this concept of imposter syndrome, “I’m what if-ing all over myself” … “I just what-if-ed everywhere”. But isn’t that exactly what imposter syndrome is? You tell yourself a story of failure - even though everything around you literally says you are capable.
The GRITTY GAL marketing website is launching soon - and we’ve fielded tons of questions about GRITTY and MAYHEM and how they live together. Y'all we cannot wait to share it with you! And in the meantime - join us as we talk about the idea of “analysis paralysis” and the concept or “over painting the picture”. Life will give you so many chances to quit … or even to dismiss other people achievements. And we talk about the idea of “freedom” as a business owner. After all - freedom is never free.
For more mayhem, be sure to follow us:
Insta @marketingandmayhem
YouTube @MarketingMayhemPod
And don't forget to leave us a 5 star review! Or message us to deep dive into your topic or just give us feedback!
Hosted by @raebecca.miller and @jennyfromthe843
Good morning.
Speaker 1:Hi, hi, it's good to see you.
Speaker 2:It's good to see you too, although it's more fun when we're together.
Speaker 1:It is. I won't lie, though. You and I just like had a quick catch up session we did On life before we hopped on here. I kind of love I mean. I know we can't always be together, and actually it does. From a recording perspective it can be really challenging, but I love our little like coffee talks catch-ups coffee and coke talks oh that's true.
Speaker 2:Yeah, not to be confused with cocaine. It's coke. We're literally talking coke zero, I know, but that could go either way. I just want to be confused with cocaine.
Speaker 1:It's coke. We're literally talking coke zero. I know but that could go either way. I just want to be clear. Well, and you, I do have like a funny screenshot where you were actually talking about it, and the more you talked about it, the more it sounded like a drug because of your caffeine addiction, which I also have one. I'm not judging you.
Speaker 2:I think it tastes like dirt. I love the dirt here for the dirt.
Speaker 1:How about this? Here for the actual dirt?
Speaker 2:I wanted to talk about something because we have gotten so much feedback, which I think is amazing.
Speaker 1:It's the best, something about somebody you know. Of course, I don't know my love language. We should unpack this with somebody.
Speaker 2:I love that idea.
Speaker 1:Okay, so write that down, like let's talk about love language. I don't know what mine is, but I will tell you this I absolutely recognize that taking even if it's two minutes, even if it's just text or social media, but taking time to listen to it and then taking time to send a message with actual feedback, even if it's just praise. I really, really, really appreciate that and I've responded to everybody that came my way and I know you've done the same and I hope I've done a good job telling you guys how much that means to me. But I just want to say it like on the air I could not be more thankful or feel more special about you guys doing that.
Speaker 2:Yes, and like, my favorite thing and I feel like we've heard it several times is when people say I feel like I'm cuddled up on the couch with you guys just talking to a girlfriend.
Speaker 1:That is the best compliment I think that we could get, because that's exactly the vibe that we were going for We've gotten a few too, that are like I feel like I'm driving with you, I feel like I'm at dinner with my girlfriends, I feel like I'm on the couch with you guys. I live for that one dinner with my girlfriends.
Speaker 2:I feel like I'm on the couch with you guys. I live for that one. I do because, just like we've talked about on previous episodes, just about how lonely it can be to be a woman, a middle-aged woman, a mom, a wife I just think it can be lonely and to feel like you have your people, in whatever capacity. I just think it's. I want to tell you something.
Speaker 1:I've been looking into your enneagram a little bit, and your enneagram is one that um often feels more alone than other oh my god, I just got chills at my back.
Speaker 2:I actually, oh my god, my eyes.
Speaker 1:No, that's like a real thing for you.
Speaker 2:So i've've been trying to like.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:I have tears in my eyes.
Speaker 1:Well, it's true. For you that's like a very true um, like where you go in a state of stress and like I. Now I pay attention, because I always paid attention to mine, I pay attention to Christina's, I pay attention to a few people's, but now I watch yours closely too, and that the loneliness that you feel is different than the loneliness that I feel truly like in your spirit. That is so interesting. I'll send you one that I saved.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, and that is true. I do get lonely, well, so I just want to validate that. Well, I appreciate that.
Speaker 1:You are sweet. I'm just telling you like that, you, you do feel it in a different way. So you, you know that's okay. God, that is so interesting You're not alone.
Speaker 2:Yeah, send that to me, send that to me. Okay, so back to the feedback.
Speaker 1:I got one the other day that talked about I actually have this friend that does not have kids and she, I think, hesitated to listen to it in the beginning because she thought it was going to be like a mom's podcast.
Speaker 1:She sent me three of the longest, most in-depth pieces of feedback about it, but high level the fact that this is not just about being a mom and it's really more about being a woman and being in a world where we don't talk about things very much, and so that's one of the isolating things. She has sort of this health crisis that's very isolating and no one really knows how to talk about it with her and like she's not even sure. So she's still unpacking that. But this idea that we're kind of like clearing the table and almost like dumping out the handbag of all the things Almost every episode she'll send me like some kind of really thoughtful feedback about how we touched on something that she didn't even know was universal.
Speaker 1:So like she really resonated with when we had Christina on yeah and we were talking, because right now she actually has to take a gigantic step back from her passion and her work because of this health crisis, so she doesn't have these accomplishments that she used to have, and so and she can't go, go, go or do, do, do, and so that's really challenging, so that I felt like that was so thoughtful, and I love this idea that it's not just about being moms.
Speaker 1:We were very thoughtful about that when we created it.
Speaker 2:But honestly, that was one of the things that I wanted and is that, you know, I am still my own person. I think that as we get older, we become you know. First you go it's like, oh, you're somebody's daughter, oh, you're somebody's daughter, oh, you're, you know, so-and-so's best friend. And then it's like, oh, you're so-and-so's wife, and now you're so-and-so's mom, and it's like you don't even have a name. And I think this one of my goals with this whole thing was just to really kind of like re-find our voice, just as we who we are as individuals, and encourage other women to do that Cause I do think it's easy to get lost in that space of being someone else's something, and I just so we talked about this.
Speaker 1:You guys don't know this yet, but we're having Christina back on, but you and I talked about actually having a discussion with her about. I saw a quote the other day that was like if you can't say your occupation, you can't say that you're a wife and you can't say that you're a mom how would you describe yourself? And I was like oh so I mean, I already lost one of those titles, or I actually chose to give that up.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, I don't even know what I would say.
Speaker 1:I know. So we're going to unpack that with Christina and our listeners. I think we're going to go down the rabbit hole. Maybe she won't listen to it.
Speaker 2:That's one that I normally don't often prepare for these podcasts. I usually just you get what you get, but that one I'm going to have to put some thought into because I genuinely don't know how I can answer that right now.
Speaker 1:Me either, but I posted it on my Instagram and a lot of people responded and they were like I have no idea how I would describe myself, and you and I are actually talking about our personal brands quite a bit in general right now too, and that can be really challenging, yeah, it really yeah, it is.
Speaker 2:It is really challenging. Yeah, it really yeah it is.
Speaker 1:It is really challenging. Other feedback A lot of people would really like me to become an affiliate for McDonald's and I don't know how that would work, but I'm I like, I'm almost willing to bet.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh, we would be millionaires.
Speaker 1:How do we become McDonald's affiliates? Two people were crying over how I got too fat for my car one time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that was pretty funny, but just to be clear, you were pregnant, so I mean it's not like you were.
Speaker 1:I think it's funnier if we say I was too fat for my car.
Speaker 2:My 800-pound life. Isn't that the name of that show?
Speaker 1:I've watched that show in depth.
Speaker 2:Me too, back here. Remember the name of it, what the pound number is?
Speaker 1:no it's whatever that. It could be my 300 pound life, my 600 pound life, it's whatever pounds they're at. It stresses me out, though I'm gonna be honest with you. I watched one where, like because I was wondering how they make all this money for the food, and then I was watching with my mom, who was equal parts obsessed and then disgusted but I'm not saying that you're if you're overweight, it disgusting. But there was this situation where she talked about how she made money and she would like put on all this makeup and eat a whole cake on the internet.
Speaker 2:Can we make money like that?
Speaker 1:Cause, give me a lip gloss A whole cake with like a ring light and a ton of makeup. And then as soon as she turned it off she got back in her sweats and they ordered like 6 million things from McDonald's. Ate a whole cake, I don't mean.
Speaker 2:Like a slice. You're talking like a whole cake.
Speaker 1:Around 12 inch, like in a sexual way, like on the internet, and made money. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:How is eating a full cake sexual?
Speaker 1:I mean they. I think they like love to watch her be nourished.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, this is. We have the weirdest. I don't understand. We have the weirdest conversations. How did we get from feedback to this? We were talking about your car, Okay.
Speaker 1:Sorry, yes, okay. So other feedback I have a couple. We have a couple male listeners, which I think is pretty cool.
Speaker 2:I would never have guessed that, besides my husband, of course.
Speaker 1:You know what I think it is. I think it's this idea that you are getting the opportunity to listen to girl talk. Ooh, I love that. I was trying to figure it out the other day. But I think it's this idea that you got invited into a room where you don't you can't talk and you don't get an opinion, but you get the singular chance to listen to the way that girls interact. And I think after like one episode, they're like yeah, no, I'm coming back. That's so funny.
Speaker 2:That is so dead on. I think Nate listens because he is a supportive husband, but I think it also is probably helping him like, oh God, what is going on with that brain of hers? Like cause, you know, I don't.
Speaker 1:One of them is one of my cousins and he was like I really thought I had no business listening to this. Um, and he's also, by the way, back in the dating pool. Super sweet out of state New York. If you are single there too and you're a really nice person, you can reach out to me and I will decide if you're going to mention marketing and mayhem.
Speaker 1:for a 15% I'm just kidding Mention, marketing and mayhem to land a really great guy with a heart of gold. But I'm going to vet the hell out of you first. But yes, no, he listens and he was like I'm getting so much insight into a world that I knew existed.
Speaker 2:I just really did that. No, it's like that movie what women want, with like mel gibson, we should that and that's like a marketing movie.
Speaker 1:It is a marketing sleepover. Should we watch them?
Speaker 2:next sleepover? We should. If as long as you'll make piccata again, that's all I care about. And that was another. That was more feedback. We got that y' as you'll make piccata again, that's all I care about. That was more feedback. We got that y'all want the chicken piccata recipe, which I will be going to get because she can't give it to me because she doesn't know.
Speaker 1:I've been making chicken piccata for long enough that I don't use a recipe. This is the challenge.
Speaker 2:I'm just going to come and film, you, film, you do it, and then I'll type it up for everybody, including measurements and all because it's so good.
Speaker 1:Okay, Can we? Should we just do like a live?
Speaker 2:That is, yeah, we probably could. Yeah, that'd be fun, maybe, why not?
Speaker 1:Okay, chicken piccata recipe. Um, what else have we received? We got some good feedback about things we say too much or Unpack. I say unpack a lot, but I don't know of a better way to say what I'm about to do. And I will tell you this, and we've said this before we're talking in real time. We don't script it, we don't edit it, and so I use that as sort of this, like moniker or whatever to like let myself know that I'm about to say something I haven't necessarily fully processed, but also to basically say wait, I want to pause and I want to go a little bit deeper. I don't know.
Speaker 2:And I just say like a lot, because I can't help it, I say too and at the end of the day, it is what it is.
Speaker 1:You get what you get. Yep, we love the feedback.
Speaker 2:It's been so, you know, because you do these things. We started this podcast and we were like is anybody going to listen to it? Are they going to like it? I mean, I personally hate my voice oh my God, mine too but we've just leaned into it and are doing it and we're having. It's so fun.
Speaker 1:I have a couple people that say, though we have great voices for this, I don't love my voice. I don't think anyone loves their voice, but I did have people say that we are enjoyable to listen to, and, as a person who's listened to multiple books on audible, I understand what they're saying, because there are some voices that I just I'm like I cannot, there's no way I can listen to it. Um, and then I've had a couple of people also say we do a really good job keeping a speed, so they don't actually have to.
Speaker 1:I guess there's a thing where you can listen to podcast.
Speaker 2:Yeah, cause I'm kind of impatient with words, like if somebody talks super slow, I'm just like dude, come on, I got shit to do, let's go yeah. And so they are saying also one of my other comments that I love is that we have good chemistry.
Speaker 1:Oh, we do, though. I agree, and I love that.
Speaker 2:But that's just sweet, I think. I love to hear that because again, we just kind of said we were going to do this and we had no clue if we were going to have good chemistry on here or not. But we do.
Speaker 1:No, we really do, and we do in person. We do on this, we do in business. We are in more boardrooms than we talk about, and it works to our benefit in a really good way. Yes, I think we do a good job nourishing that too, though. Even things like when we drive together. I think we know how to warm ourselves up to wherever we're going, even the conversation before we jumped on here, ourselves up to like wherever we're going, even the conversation before we jumped on here. We're really careful to you know what we're going to unpack this. We're really careful to protect our chemistry, like what you hear. What you see is a very good portion of like how we communicate, but we're also very thoughtful about like making sure that we have our relationship too.
Speaker 2:Yes, it's a very open and honest place, which it's been really good yeah.
Speaker 1:We have our coffee talk. We definitely have a. We do a good job setting boundaries with each other Not that we have to do a lot of that, but we're really like, even if it's things like, okay, well, I'm not going to be available at this part, this is where I'll be, or just we have a lot of moving parts in both of our businesses, so we're really good about even saying I'm not in a great headspace.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you did that last night. I was so proud of you. You were like I have hit my max today. I'm like, okay, great, and I've done that with you before and I feel like we don't do that. I feel like that's one of those things that we're both trying to like overcome you didn't take it personally because I wasn't hitting my max with you.
Speaker 1:I was hitting my max with another situation in my it didn't matter.
Speaker 2:It didn't matter, but I knew it's a good place to to be or to be supportive or to be anything I literally couldn't be.
Speaker 1:Even one more thing, which is something I rarely articulate, I know and I'm really proud of you.
Speaker 2:I also struggle with boundaries badly. I'm a work in progress with that.
Speaker 1:My friend Marita gave me a book about boundaries. It's on my Audible. I have one too. What's it called? She said she listened to it. I don't.
Speaker 2:I think it's. Is it called boundaries Cause I think I have the same book.
Speaker 1:We might, I might've shared it with you too.
Speaker 2:No, I bought it like three years ago. Listen, this has been an ongoing issue for me.
Speaker 1:She said it oh, it is, it's reason. That's it. That's the one I have too. We need to read it, so we can, should we? Yes, okay. So she said what she would recommend is listening to it first and then actually buying it and doing the workbook along with it. She said she's listened to it probably twice and read it probably three times. Okay.
Speaker 2:And that was some other feedback we got that y'all love our book discussions.
Speaker 1:Yes, they want a book club. I don't know if we can actually, but if we ever need somebody to manage it. I have a friend.
Speaker 2:What I could totally do a book club. I love it Okay. I think that would be so fun, and I also heard that people agreed with me that it is smut. It is not romance, because if you were talking about the things that these books talk about, it's smut Romance is not romance.
Speaker 1:I just want to say this I want it in my life.
Speaker 2:Right. Speaking of which, did you finish the?
Speaker 1:idea of you yet. No, I did not, but that's because I have been. I had to do the driving one.
Speaker 2:You're killing me. You're killing me. You're killing me. Please finish it before the movie comes out.
Speaker 1:I'm going to have time, though I'm going, I'm not going to say it. So Christina and I have this thing. I'm traveling with Christina soon.
Speaker 2:Yes, we have a trip soon.
Speaker 1:Yes. So we, here's the thing, and Christina created this, and I agree with this in a really big way we don't call it vacation because we're bringing our kids.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was about to say that is, that is a trip. There's a difference.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Right, we're traveling, so we will be traveling together next week, um, but I should have and this might be a totally idiotic statement I should have a little bit of time to actually do some reading. She's a big reader.
Speaker 2:Are you?
Speaker 1:flying? No, you're driving. You know I'm a big driver, I will fly. I'm not afraid to fly, but I like my vehicle and I like my stuff Same I travel with my stuff and I don't like everyone getting a dang head cold just so I can have to go to urgent care.
Speaker 2:Do you know that I travel with my blankets?
Speaker 1:So like I absolutely travel with my blankets and my pillow.
Speaker 2:To the point that, like we're going to see my in-laws next week in Florida and we're flying, I order blankets off Amazon. I did this last year and sent them to their house. And I ordered pillows to send to their house so I could have my covers.
Speaker 1:I understand. I have a friend who and she's she can be a little bit of a wild card, um, but she even brings her own sheets when she goes to a hotel. She will unstrip the entire bed.
Speaker 2:I would. I would do that in a heartbeat because I'm very specific, yeah.
Speaker 1:I'm weird about sheets. She's really funny about cleanliness and all the things and she opened my mind to something I'd never thought about.
Speaker 2:Yes, I'm like this. Some people call it having it.
Speaker 1:She's the one that told me to be a great podcast voice and that she pretty much hates when anyone talks and she loves listening to us. That's so nice. Thank you, she honestly I is one of the most brutally honest people, so she's not going to tell you just to make you feel good. She could not care less. I'm here for it. I appreciate brutal I met her in Christina's wedding. She was in Christina's bridal group and so I didn't know her before that, but yeah, she's funny.
Speaker 2:How's your trip prep going?
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's funny. How's your trip prep going? Well, I will tell you this. I mentioned it when I was at a checkout counter yesterday, just casually. I was like, oh yeah, I have to get some stuff together, and they were like we don't, when do you leave? And I was like, oh, saturday, and now we're inside of the week, right. So I'm running significantly low on time.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So, like, what kind of prepper are you? Cause, like I, am the person who like gets ready to like get ready. So, like I'll make lists, I'll go ahead and get suitcases down, I'll start packing stuff.
Speaker 1:I pack early. I will be packed by Thursday. And then I'll remember like three things.
Speaker 2:So for somebody who doesn't unpack their suitcase for months, I am a proactive packer.
Speaker 1:Me too.
Speaker 2:For sure I've got the laundry will be a consistent thing all week. But yeah, I'm pretty much like ready to go.
Speaker 1:You know I have a problem with my brain. I run a light load and a dark load every day.
Speaker 2:If our septic system could handle that, I would do the same, just because I feel like laundry just bogs down, and I hate laundry. It's the worst.
Speaker 1:It does, and so if I just have to fold two smaller loads and I don't, now that I'm I have like actually a little bit less laundry. I don't know if I'll change that pattern, but I don't dry any of my athletic clothes. I like them to air dry.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:So there's always like leggings and sports bras hanging around the dining room chairs. Yeah, I just think they smell better. There is some research that says that like putting that stuff in the dryer makes any like. That's what makes them get like funky and weird.
Speaker 2:Really, yeah, I dry my leggings. This is. This conversation is taking a turn.
Speaker 1:I have a huge pile of laundry sitting here right beside me.
Speaker 2:That I need to deal with that. I need to fold. It's not my fave.
Speaker 1:Athletic wear though Speaking of getting ready.
Speaker 2:let me tell you one of the things that we've been working on behind the scenes. Ooh nuts, we've got to keep things going. Website for Gritty Gal Marketing, which is the marketing business that we have. We haven't talked about it too terribly much. We've mentioned it in passing, mainly because we haven't had a website.
Speaker 1:We have some projects going on at Gritty that are really cool and so we like to like between the two of us because my mom didn't understand, like what is Marketing and Mayhem and then what is Gritty? Marketing and Mayhem is a Gritty gal production, correct, if you think of it like that. So the marketing company is Gritty gal. We call it Gritty a lot. Gritty gal. This is a production under that house. It's separate but it's not. It gives you a good idea of like who we are and how we show up and we like the idea of talking about marketing and sort of making it not seem like this pie in the sky situation. Actually, we've gotten a lot of feedback about that, people saying I've never even thought about marketing because it's not part of my job. But this is really fun to hear.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But this is a Gritty Gal production. Yes, it's all under the same umbrella.
Speaker 2:So business, the Gritty Gal, is really our business space. You know I'm not going to say we're buttoned up over there, but it's a little more professional, forward facing, whereas the marketing and mayhem is just that, it's the mayhem of the inside of me and Rebecca's brains. So it's just kind of a fun place for us to have and it gives insight into what it's like to work with us and what deep thinkers we are, because that's what makes us successful in marketing. So you're a website.
Speaker 2:Yes, it's a labor of love. It's a labor of love. It's a labor of love, and I have very.
Speaker 1:You know, you come into something and you just have a very specific idea of what you want it to look like the website is really falling in jenny's yes sphere and place and I just want to say thank you, because I don't think I have the bandwidth right now, but and I know how careful you are about it and how thoughtful and like, sometimes I feel like I'm like the kid in the back seat, like we, but like, and then I remember, sometimes I think about like all the other stuff I do, whether it's like the social or the whatever, and I'm like it's still like a very good balancing act, but I do know how big this is and I really appreciate how much you're putting.
Speaker 2:It's just my baby.
Speaker 1:Like, just like this.
Speaker 2:Thank you. I feel the same way about social with you. I just I don't have the bandwidth for social.
Speaker 2:Like I just social like I just know, and I so I just want to say I know how careful you're being about this and I really trust you and I've never I have to be up one night, perfect my life, and I love that. It's gonna look really good. So, yeah, so we, so I did. We have someone doing our website for us. Um, it's looking really good. We have a very specific look that we want and I want it to be very easy to understand and depict what we do. But what I discovered yesterday is that I sometimes get analysis paralysis meaning I'm smiling. I just will edit this thing to death Instead of just letting it go live, because I have this like vision.
Speaker 1:Probably why you're not letting me touch it.
Speaker 2:I'm going to be honest with you. Like notice, I haven't asked for much of your feedback, so I'm like I really don't know if I want it, because I feel like I keep editing it so much. I'm like I don't think we need we don't need two chefs in the kitchen right now.
Speaker 1:I don't think. That's exactly why I'm going to tell you two things. First of all, I consider myself a creative, so you can take that how you want. Like, art is kind of my thing. I love art, I'm decent at it, I have an appreciation for art and any creative space, whether it's thought or whatever. You can over paint a picture. I'm going to throw that out there because it's very real.
Speaker 1:And I have actually some personal artwork in my home that I had created with this girl, megan Keck Thompson, who I'm obsessed with, and she actually works at my kid's school, so now I see her all the time. But I have two side-by-side paintings. And she actually text messaged me the paintings through the process and she was like I just want to be really careful here. And I was like please make sure that you do not over paint the picture. And she was like okay, I'm glad that you understand this, so you need to tell me when we're going to hit stop. And she like, let me decide. But also, this is kind of even how this podcast started, where you really wanted it to be something, and I was like we just have to jump, yeah, and so I'm a perfectionist too. Like I have, like I joke about this thing with my brain. If you walked into my home, you would be like is this girl? Okay, it's true, I'll let Jenny describe it, but I do.
Speaker 2:No, it is like you can perform surgery in her place. I mean it's yeah, I'm a little bit envious that I'm not like that it's yeah, I'm a little bit envious that I'm not like that.
Speaker 1:No, I so I'm actually actively working on releasing some of that. I don't know if that's like a trauma response or what, but my ex-husband used to joke that it was the museum we're in the museum.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, it's very, it's very tidy. But yeah, no, I'm definitely. I do get like that. I feel like I want things perfect and all set and ready to go before you pull the trigger and like do anything. But I'm starting to realize that that's just, it's not a good thing, and that you can apply that to any area of your life, whether it be your website, your business.
Speaker 1:If you've got that inkling to do something, there are going to be a million reasons why you are excuses truthfully, why you shouldn't do it or why you shouldn't start it, and you're like, oh, I'm getting ready to get ready, but you just, we were just a list of how many things like, if this were a Mario Kart gamers I actually I shouldn't even say that because I don't play video games If this were one of those games where, like, stuff keeps popping up and you have to hop over it or like punch through it or whatever. We have had so many obstacles, it would have been so easy to throw in the towel and we've, truthfully, all of it, podcast business, just all of it.
Speaker 1:Yep, even with um gritty like we've had, you know we're we have clients under that house that have given us different obstacles also that we didn't anticipate, and maybe we'll talk about some of that stuff further down the line here. But, um, and none of it's bad, but it would have been really just like throw our hands up and say like this is too hard, this is taking too long, this is too frustrating, and and even outside of that, we're actually very careful about who we even work with. We decide in the meeting like it's not a free for all, like we just we leave the meeting and we say sometimes that is absolutely not the right client for us.
Speaker 2:Yes, we don't like how they speak.
Speaker 1:We don't like how they show up. We have a. If we have a question about integrity or values, we are immediately out.
Speaker 2:Yep.
Speaker 1:So yeah, it's just.
Speaker 2:But I think you can think something to death, just like you, you know, don't over paint the picture. I think you can think something to death, just like you, you know, don't over paint the picture. I mean, that's that's.
Speaker 1:I feel like that's one of those things, that that we all think before you even start, yes, yes, and then you're going to get the obstacles. So then you get a second chance to quit. Yes, it even yesterday.
Speaker 2:Seriously. Well, I was sitting here doing the website stuff. I put my head down in my hands. I was like what am I even doing, why? Why am I even doing this? Because I just wasn telling me that just needs to be shut down.
Speaker 1:But yeah, I mean, it's again it can be in any avenue of your life. It really. Let's talk about that voice. Why is the name of it eluding me right now? I think I have it written down somewhere Imposter syndrome Do you have it?
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh my God, do I have it? Are you joking? Right now I don't feel like I'm qualified to do anything ever.
Speaker 1:I mean, I have it even in my dating life.
Speaker 2:I know we were just talking about this.
Speaker 1:I know I'm just saying like I have it in, in. I actually have it a little bit less in gritty, do you? I would just I it just occurred to me, so I'm saying it out loud we're gonna unpack it.
Speaker 2:But yeah, I actually have it less than gritty. Well, here's my thing. I know that, we know our stuff, I have no doubt about that. But that little like I yeah, there's no doubt about what we are capable of, what we can do I think for me it's more of like, well, what if it doesn't work out? Well, what if this, what if this, what if this, what if this? And it's just like, oh my God, like I'm what if-ing all over myself. Then I can't do I, do, I just what, if everywhere?
Speaker 1:I think I'm going to save that as an audio clip, but I'm going to isolate it and take it out of context, because you're saying I'm what if-ing all over myself. It's true, I'm just what if-ing everywhere.
Speaker 2:Because it's like you know.
Speaker 1:I do not have control of myself.
Speaker 2:I don't. I mean, it's this little voice in the back of my head.
Speaker 1:I'm what if-ing all over myself.
Speaker 2:It pisses me off, but, yeah, I have no doubt in my skills or capabilities. It's just more of are you sure you can do that, are you sure? Yeah, but it's going to be hard. Yeah, but you don't know how to podcast. Yeah, but how are you even going to figure out equipment? You know that kind of thing. How are you even going to figure out equipment?
Speaker 1:You know that kind of thing. So I wanted to talk. I want to go back one step, because I said the word or the phrase imposter syndrome and, if you haven't heard it before, I just clicked it into chat GPT. I wanted a definition really quick. If you guys aren't using chat GPT, let me tell you how much I enjoy it.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, I'm obsessed, obsessed, obsessed, and we probably should talk about that more. But it is such a useful tool, so I just said cause I was already in it for something else. I said what is imposter syndrome? This is the chat GPT definition, so take it with a grain of salt. This isn't from the Merriam Webster whatever.
Speaker 1:Imposter syndrome refers to this, a psychological pattern where individuals doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent fear of being exposed as fraud, despite evidence of their competence or success. People experiencing imposter syndrome often attribute their achievements to luck or external factors rather than their own abilities, leading to feelings of inadequacy, self-doubt, anxiety, especially in professional or academic settings. I would say the one thing is I don't think we've ever attributed anything to luck, but I think other people around us and I think this is important as a business owner or a professional it's really easy to look at somebody who's in their 20th year of marketing or their whatever and just say, oh yeah, but they knew the right people and they were lucky. If you had any idea what it takes from the background or from the starting line or whatever, you would never chalk it up that easily. But I do think that people are very quick to be dismissive about other people's achievements, like that.
Speaker 2:Oh, I agree wholeheartedly yeah.
Speaker 1:And I think that contributes.
Speaker 2:You don't see the light. I mean, you know, Rebecca and I talk about all the time about the freedom that we have and how grateful we are for that and being able to do all these different things. But it's late nights, it's early mornings, it's weekends, it's constant conversation about all the things that we have going on. It's podcast production, podcast titling, podcast promotion. I mean freedom is in quotations. Yes, when we say freedom, we mean it's on our terms and we're able to be involved in things that we want to be involved in. But I mean, to be clear, we are I'm not going to say the word anchored, because I feel like it has like a negative connotation, but like we are in the thick of it with what we've got going on.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we Freedom. If you saw there's whole reels about this right when people are like oh yeah, I didn't want to work for the man from nine to five, so I decided to work for myself 24 seven. Freedom is very much in quotations here. Because you would be if you took our schedule and then you took like a typical work schedule, you would be shook and I will say there are a few people who really show up and say things to us like I don't know how you do it, yes, or are you okay, can I get you anything? Or like I mean it's simple things for me, like one of my biggest pet peeves is like even like refilling my own water. Like the people that show up and have a beverage no, I know, it's like a real big thing. It like annoys me up and have a beverage.
Speaker 2:No, I know it's like a real big thing. It like annoys me If somebody doesn't more than like at a restaurant.
Speaker 1:Just take care of my beverages for me.
Speaker 2:I know that I need a full time job.
Speaker 1:I mean you've got a lot of beverages. It's the love language, it is your love language. You could take my food, I would just take my beverages. But I like it's more about the care part, right Cause, like that's a thing for me, like I just need I don't know why, I just need them. So like somebody showing up and having like an extra like summer will sometimes do that She'll like show up with two diet Cokes at some PTA event and I'm like, oh, like you really it's just thoughtful, Like I love thoughtful.
Speaker 1:I love people who are thoughtful and considerate of other people when you work as hard as we work, and you work as hard as even like a summer works, and then you realize that there are going to be people who do that for you and then you're going to do the same for other people. You start to get really good at deciding who's allowed to really like be inside of your circle. It's interesting.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I actually want to do a podcast about that, about our circles and what that looks like as we enter this phase of our life. I know we give each other.
Speaker 1:Feedback about our friends.
Speaker 2:We do give each other feedback about our friends. It's true, I think it's funny, but yeah, let's jot that down.
Speaker 1:Okay, write it down, because we're getting close to the end of this one, but I think we should definitely. Okay, so let's touch on this really quick. There's the old quote right. Basically like show me your circle and I can tell you who you are. And I'm going to say I believe in that halfway, especially in a city like Charleston where a lot of people are very consumed with perception, I'm going to say I can't give that statement full weight, because a lot of people will have relationships and friendships that benefit the perception of them but don't actually fill their cup. Yes, isn't that interesting. I was just thinking about that.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And it made me really mad. Why? Because I I I don't see their relationships as two relationships, like as an outsider who watches them. Yeah, a lot of their life looks very fake and staged to me. So when they said that, I was like I actually put their stories on mute because that's how angry it made me, because I was like you're not being authentic. I also have a very hard time being around people who aren't authentic, so that's why my circle has gotten substantially smaller.
Speaker 2:But again, I want to save this for another day because I do think that's a whole conversation worth having about women friendships and because actually most of my friendships are with men.
Speaker 1:Like, my best friends are with women. I love my girlfriends, but I also am a really good girlfriend. Yeah, you are a good girlfriend.
Speaker 2:I think you are a good girlfriend. I think there's a lot of bad girlfriends. I love my girlfriends. I just I feel like I've just was always like a guy's girl. So most of my like I had a groom, I had a bridesman in my wedding. I love that.
Speaker 1:We had a, we had a best woman in our wedding.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we had a girl on his side, yeah.
Speaker 1:Did that make you?
Speaker 2:uncomfortable. No, I love her.
Speaker 1:We've stayed close. She's the one that sent me all this stuff for my adrenal stuff. She's really big into health and wellness and she works for Standard Process.
Speaker 2:I want to talk about that too. Actually, I'm going to drop that down.
Speaker 1:We can probably have her on. She works for standard process. I want to talk about that too. Actually, I'm going to drop that down. We can probably have her on. She works for standard process and that's like that, not one of those random Amazon or GNC companies, it's incredible. So she immediately reached out when she figured out that I was going through something big and she was like let's just start immediately supporting your adrenals, which is one of the ways you process, like stress and trauma, immediately supporting your adrenals, which is one of the ways you process, like stress and trauma.
Speaker 1:So within and she's really like his friend originally and she's found a way to maintain both relationships because we're actually very amicable in our divorce, we're doing a good job at it, but she. Within seven days I had a package at my house of a full adrenal program which I love.
Speaker 2:I love that. I know I'm jotting those down Imposter syndrome, All these things we talked about today. We kind of went all over the place, but that's to be expected for.
Speaker 1:Well, we're kind of in our feelings right now where it's like spring. I feel like spring is very much a change, right. It's like this evolution sort of season. So I don't know if that's really what's happening, but it feels very evolutionary and we're at a part in mayhem where we're really evolving and then gritty has just like, honestly, a panty dropper of a client, yeah.
Speaker 2:So it really is.
Speaker 1:It really is I hate to say that, but like it's true, and I can't think of a better way to say it, but Gritty has a panty dropper of a client and so I'm really excited about all these things. But I definitely feel like it's like the daffodil bulbs are like coming up, so I'm not shocked that we're feeling a little introspective. Yes, agreed.
Speaker 2:So hopefully we'll have a little maybe lighter topic next time.
Speaker 1:Who knows, I don't know, we have somebody coming on to talk about relationships and friendships.
Speaker 2:At some, point At some point. Yes, all right, all right guys, thanks for listening. We will see you next week.