Tim (00:00):
And the more attention you get, the more there's gonna be people that they see you and they don't like you for whatever reason. Yeah. And that is part of the game.
Cindy (00:07):
We've seen people do it right. They start to get some attention, and the moment they see that negativity that's inevitably gonna come, they retreat. It's the perspective that you take in the face of the haters and the naysayers and the critics that determine the direction that you're gonna go.
Tim (00:20):
The vast majority of all humans that have ever lived in all of human history compromise their dreams because the fear of rocking the boat, because the fear of, what will they say? Little dogs are always gonna bark at big dogs. That is just the way it is.
Cindy (00:33):
Welcome to the Takeover with Tim and Cindy, where we show you how to dominate every area of life and business. Let's get winning.
Cindy (00:44):
Welcome back to the Takeover with Tim and Cindy. In today's episode, we are gonna talk all about haters critics, people that will give you their opinion on the journey to your goals. Our show is all about how to dominate in every area of life and business. And best believe when you are on the journey to domination, there is gonna be haters. There are gonna be critics, there are gonna be a lot of challenges from what people say about you, to you behind your back, the works. So our goal with this episode is to arm you with the right perspective to take when it does happen. Because surely enough, it will happen if you haven't already faced it. You will have caterers, you will have critics. We wanna arm you with the right tools, the right perspectives, the right mindset to take when it does happen, so that you can continue to dominate every area of life and business. So, Tim
Tim (01:43):
<Laugh>,
Cindy (01:44):
You know this to be true. We always say little dogs always bark at big dogs. What does that, what does that mean? So,
Tim (01:51):
You know, I've lived in condos for the last 10 years of my life. And you, one thing you always see in the elevator is the little dogs always park at the big dogs. <Laugh>. Big dogs will be walking around. They're chill. They're like, they ain't never prove anything. They're friendly. Who, Hey, what's going on? The little dogs are like that, always bark at the big dogs and the big dogs can destroy 'em. But the big dogs are like, dude, chill out. You know? Yeah. <laugh>, right? So, so little dogs are always gonna bark at big dogs, meaning little haters will always bark at people that are doing bigger, better things than them. Yes. And you have to be so aware that you think sometimes these people are gonna be out there Mm-Hmm. But a lot of times they're gonna be close. Wow. Or they're gonna be, say you're doing reach out. They're gonna be somebody that looks like your perfect client. These little dogs barking at the big dog can come in different forms. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>. There's a book, actually that we read called The Dream Giver. And it's a really, really good book where I've read a bunch of times, it's an allegory of somebody nobody on the way to, what's it?
Cindy (02:50):
I think it's like the land of promise or
Tim (02:51):
Something. The land like of promise. I said, no, nobody from the land of nowhere trying to become a somebody from the land of somewhere. Right. Or, you know, and, and along the way he, he finds border bullies. And these are people that are trying to stop him along the journey. This is going to happen. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative> the bigger goal you have, the more haters you're gonna have. Yes. You cannot absolutely cannot go create and achieve anything great without having people trying to stop you along the way. And these are gonna be good intentions sometimes. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. Sometimes these will be people that love you and just want you to be safe and don't want you to get hurt. But the reality is people give up on their dreams. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative> then they make sense of the compromise they gave with their dream to live a normal life.
Tim (03:40):
And then when they see you going, I'm gonna go for it. I'm going go for my dream, they're like, no, no, they're gonna wanna stop you. Shouldn't it? Oh, you can't do you Mm-Hmm. Stop doing that. It's not safe. And that's gonna be like the small, like the, the close that are gonna be the good intention ones. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. Then you're gonna have the haters that are along the way as you're starting to get attention, as you're starting to become known, they're gonna hate you and, and talk smack for all kinds of crazy stuff. Yes. You have no idea how many negative comments I have had on my beard. It's wild. On my beard. I'm like, dude, I don't even know who you are. Mm-Hmm. But you, you have an opinion about my beard. It's great. 'cause It's making my ad cost go down. It's getting more attention.
Tim (04:24):
People don't re haters don't realize the more they negatively engage with your content, the more the social platforms are gonna promote you more and more and more. It's engagement. Yeah. It's engagement, it's attention. Right. We live in a, we live in a time and a generation where you are going, attention is everything. If you are in obscurity, if you're not getting attention, you're not getting haters. It means that you're not making in waves. You're not getting out there right now. You have to get attention and to get attention from the people that you want attention from means you are also by default going to attract haters. There's absolutely zero way around it. And so what you have to do is reframe your mind with the haters and use them for energy. Yes. Use them as a sign that you are moving in the right direction. Mm-Hmm.
Cindy (05:11):
<Affirmative>. Wow. This is so, so, so powerful. What I, what I get from that is, one, just realize that it's going to happen. Yeah. And then the perspective that you take in face of it, you have to be willing to take it and move forward. So there's three things that we wanna share with you all on mindsets to take around haters and critics. And the three of them are the bigger the goal, the louder the noise. That's number one. Number two, when you face haters, remember your why. And the third is use them as fuel. Let's start at the first one, Tim. The bigger the goal, the louder the noise,
Tim (05:49):
The bigger the goal, the louder the noise. What is the most powerful position that a human being can propel themselves to in the United States? President, president of the United States of America, who has the most haters?
Cindy (06:04):
<Laugh>, the president of the us.
Tim (06:07):
President of the US Got the most haters more powerful. The bigger the goal. The bigger the dream, the more the haters. Yes. Do you think anybody that ran for president was like, oh, I don't wanna rock any boats. Hmm. Oh, this side is saying they don't like me. They actually know. Presidential candidates and marketing campaign experts know that the more haters you have, the louder your haters are, the better. Because guess what? They're putting attention on you. They're putting their attention on you. And now I'm not gonna go into any specific candidates, but we know, if we look at the ones that have gotten the most amount of attention Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>, they've done that intent. Yeah. Because where attention goes, energy flows, money flows, ideas flow. When people are focused on something, things, ideas, money flow to that, power flows to that. Because we live in a time where it's all about getting and keeping attention.
Tim (07:02):
Yeah. And so if you look at that, even negative attention is good attention. Hmm. Because you're getting attention your way. Now, you don't want to have negative attention, like, 'cause you're doing illegal stuff or things of low integrity. But know that if you are on a big gold dream, you wanna change lives, you are going to have negative haters, negative attention. And if you wanna impact a million people, you're gonna have tens of thousands of people, if not more, that absolutely hate you. They do not wanna see you win. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>, they see you and they're like disgusted by you like me. Like they literally, like, I hate that guy. I freaking hate that guy. And the more attention you get, the more there's gonna be people that they see you and they don't like you for whatever reason. Yeah. And that is part of the game.
Tim (07:49):
Yeah. Yeah. That is part of the game. And too many people have a really big goal. They have a really big dream, but they are more concerned with the way that that percentage of the world is going to negatively view them. They would rather not have that rejection. They would rather not have that negative energy than have the goal that they want. Yeah. Because you, you can't choose both. You can't say, I want to not have haters and I wanna do the big goal thing. You can't, if you want the big goal, you have to accept you're gonna have both. Yes. Absolutely. No way around it. And the more basic and vanilla you are to kind of alleviate any kind of haters, the less attention you're in it, the less you're actually gonna be able to make and achieve that big goal. There is. There's no way around this.
Cindy (08:38):
Yes. Yes. Absolutely. And we've seen people do it right, where they start to get some attention, they start to get some traction, they start to get momentum. And the moment they see that negativity, that's inevitably gonna come. Haters, critics, people saying negative things, they retreat. Yep. They stop doing it. Right. Like they stopped marketing campaign or they stopped posting or whatever that looks like the activity that they were doing, they stopped doing it because of the negativity. And what Tim is saying is that's actually pulling you further away from your goal. So remember ladies and gents, the bigger the goal, the louder the noise. And if you can resolve and understand that, that's always going to happen on the journey to achieving great things. When it does happen, you're not gonna shy away from it. You're not gonna be afraid, you're not gonna retreat. You're actually gonna push forward. Yes. And that's the mindset that you have to have if you are going to win. Yes. In life and business, when haters come, when critics come, when the little dogs wanna bark, <laugh>, push forward, keep going. Yes. That's a sign that you are actually doing something. Whereas a lot of people, if they're not getting PDAs, if they're not getting negativity, it's probably because they're not doing anything about
Tim (09:45):
A hundred percent. Little dogs are always gonna bark at big dogs. That's just the way it is. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>. And just remember people that are crushing it. They're winning, they're doing things beyond where you're at. They are at the goal that you wanna get to. They're not the ones hating. No, exactly. They're not. The little dogs barking at you.
Cindy (10:02):
That's so true.
Tim (10:03):
So that's
Cindy (10:04):
So true. If you
Tim (10:05):
Haven't seen it before, Google this later video on a bucket of crabs. What happens if you put up crabs in a bucket? If one crab starts to try to climb outta the bucket, what happens? They
Cindy (10:16):
Try to pull them down. They gotta pull
Tim (10:18):
Them down. The other crabs will pull them down back down into the bucket. The moment you try to get out of the mediocre buckets into something great, the little crabs are gonna pull you back in. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>, you have to have an emotional why to your goal. There has to be a reason so powerful that it propels you emotionally way further along and plows you through what all little dogs are gonna bark and scare. Because if your emotional reaction to those negative haters is a bigger sting than the power and the driver of your why, you will give up. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>. And you will live a mediocre life, period. Yeah. Most people do this. The vast majority of all humans that have ever lived in all of human history have compromised their dreams because the fear of man, because the fear of rocking the boat. Because the fear of what will they say?
Cindy (11:17):
Ooh, that's so powerful. And that Texas injection, the second one that you mentioned, which is remember your why when you do face criticism, when you are facing haters and the negative things that people have to say, you have to remember your why, because it's your why that is gonna keep you motivated in the face of haters and criticism and actually fuel you to keep going. In what ways, Tim, can we apply that? So is it just to like, remember the why is it to write it down? If I've just gotten just like negative comments after negative comments, how do I use the why as a way to help me keep moving forward? Subscribing is the easiest way to support the podcast. Plus you'll never miss an episode, hit that subscribe button on iTunes, Spotify, Google, or wherever you're listening so that you don't miss a beat.
Tim (12:09):
So I'll just give you a really practical one that kind of applies to probably a little closer to me. But I want you to apply this to your situation. So when I wake up, if I'm feeling tired, I don't feel like getting up and going. I know the people in my life that I'm here to impact. I know the teammates at, at our company that are all in, they're a hundred percent in, they're given everything. I know their dreams, I know their goals. I know what this means to them. I know the clients that are here to win in their companies that are trusting us. Those for me are such powerful emotional drivers. To see my wife win my business partner win to see our clients win, our employees win, to see the impact to where we wanna go, the impact we wanna make, the money we want to be able to give to our church and to different causes where we wanna go.
Tim (13:03):
That is such a powerful driver that screams to me on an emotional level. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. Because you have to be able to fill these things on an emotional level. Those things pull me so strong that when I hear a hater, it like it can sting for a second and it will sometimes, but it's not like this big giant, it's like a little cricket that jumped in front of me. <Laugh> Yeah. Versus this big giant that's like standing in my path. Mm. I'm thinking of the the dream giver. It's a great book if you ever read it. Yeah, yeah. You know, like, Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>. It's not this big bully standing in my path. Like it can feel like that at first. Mm. When you're first getting haters, it can feel like this big giant, it's like, stop Holt. You can't go anywhere. But the more you start attaching it to your family, what's more important?
Tim (13:46):
Somebody who's writing negative comments about you on LinkedIn, on email or wherever on your YouTube or the freaking family that you, you've committed building a life for the kid. You have the wife, you have the partner, you have whoever, those people that you've, you've promised to create this great life for what is more important, the promise you've made to them and to yourself. Wow. Or what some little dog, some little hater that has the time to critique somebody else online. A KAA troll. What is a more powerful motivator for you? And that is exactly what you're your true, not your what you're gonna let say you write your own No, my goals, my all that your true answer to that will happen in the face of the haters. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. And if you give into the haters, that means that you are accepting a mediocre life. Wow. And you will never, ever succeed. That's
Cindy (14:39):
Powerful.
Tim (14:39):
Now here's the thing is there's even people that are gonna hear that and be like, no, they're gonna be the crabs that see, see me encouraging people get outta mediocrity. I'm trying to encourage you, if you have those big goals and dreams, get outta mediocrity. And there's going to be people that hear me right now and hear this and are the crabs that are trying to pull me back in. No man, screw that guy. Whatever. No, that's not true. That's, that's an, it is a real statement. The only reason why I say these things is because I want to see people win. Yeah. I don't want any of you listening to this to get to the end of your life and say, well, geez, I wish I wouldn't have cared what people thought so much. Mm. I, I wish I would've really gone for my goal. I really wish you don't, you don't have anybody getting to the end of their lives being, oh, you know what? I wish I would've appeased the little dogs more <laugh> those people that were talking smack. I wish I would've just done a little bit better job at making them not talk smack about me. Never,
Cindy (15:36):
Ever,
Tim (15:36):
Never. You're never gonna say that. And my hope is that if you're listening to this now, it clicks with you and it sets you on a trajectory where you move and you accomplish your goals. Mm. And you actually use this as we're gonna go into for this final part as fuel. Yes. To drive you, to encourage you and to motivate you. Because if you get the right perspective on what haters are Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>, it will actually drive you and give you energy.
Cindy (16:05):
Yes. What I love about what you said there is that perspective, because it's a perspective that you take in the face of the haters and the naysayers and the critics that determine the direction that you're gonna go. Because if you do see any one little negative comments as a giant, you're gonna be crippled and you're gonna be paralyzed and you're not gonna take action. Whereas if you see it as like, oh, it's just a little cricket, it's not much it's gonna happen. You acknowledge that it's part of the journey, you are still gonna move forward regardless of what people say. So the perspective, how much weight are you putting on negativity and haters and critics, if you are taking their words as, yes, this is my life, this is who I am. If you're taking that to heart, then of course you're, you're not gonna be able to move forward.
Cindy (16:48):
Right? Yes. So it is the perspective, what perspective and what weight are you putting on the negative things that people have to say about you? And if you can remove yourself from them, meaning whatever their perspectives are, what they wanna say about you, and stand firm and confident in yourself, in your why, in your mission and in the goal that you have, that's how you move forward. Right? So disconnecting and really having the proper perspective around haters and criticism and yes, I wanna say it's easier for us to say on this side because we've done so much work around it. Yes. We've done so much work around training our minds to see it in that way. But you can start on that today. If you don't have the right perspective around haters and naysayers and critics, you can start on building the right perspective and having the right mindset around it today. And you can strengthen that skill and build the skill over time. Maybe the first time you receive something negative, it is gonna sting as to mentioned more than if you get comments say every day, right. For like the period of a month, you're gonna get stronger. But don't let the naysayers and the critics stop you from moving forward.
Tim (17:55):
So there's a speaking technique that they say to use. And that is, if you feel nervous before you give a speech, the what's happening in your body of nerves and excitement is a very similar Yes. Physiology, biology, whatever. It's, I dunno. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative> <laugh>. It's just, it's similar. So you can literally say, take your nervousness and go, I'm excited. And it actually, you can translate your nervousness into excitement. Yes. The same way. Because the way that energy works is very cool. You can actually reinterpret the energy so that sting you feel when something negative happens, you can turn into excitement, you can turn that into fuel. You can turn that into a Yes, I'm in the right direction. Because if you use that energy as a, oh, I'm doing things wrong, and you take a haters, a small dogs, a crab pulling you back in the bucket, if you take what they say is gospel, as you were mentioning before, what they say is truth, then you're gonna get pulled down to their world.
Tim (18:53):
You're gonna get pulled down into their little world where they've given up on their goals and dreams and they're just trying to pull all the other crabs back down into the mediocre bucket. Right? Yeah. But that same energy, that same sting, that ouch, you can feel, you can quickly and immediately reinterpret that for excitement. Yes. For a yes. I'm moving on the right way for an energy, for an energized, using that as a signal in a vindication that you are moving in the right direction. Yes. And that the more people you're gonna help and impact, the more you're gonna have people that see what you're doing, see the great things you're accomplishing, and they're going to have a disdain for it because they've given up on their own dreams and goals and they see that and it has a negative sting to them. Yes. And so the reason why they are trying to pass it sting to you is because it makes them feel better. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative> about their mediocre, it literally makes them feel better when they do that. Ah, I feel less bad about my situation. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. And so they're doing that because they're trying to get rid of their own bad feeling. Yes. So it's your job to interpret, take that bad feeling on like their plan was for you to take that negative feeling from them and put it on your own burden, or to take that energy and use it as fuel. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative> for your why and for your goal,
Cindy (20:12):
Which is the third one. Right. Using criticism as a fuel to move forward. Yes. Versus as a reason to stop. So I love what you mentioned there. Images is that is the signal, it's the indicator when you do have haters or criticism or negative comments, negative people saying bad stuff about you use that as the indication. Like, yes, I'm on the right path. There are position, there are challenges, there are people saying bad things about me. Yes. I'm on the right path. Use that as fuel to move forward. Yes. Versus as a reason to give up or to stop on your goals.
Tim (20:45):
A hundred percent. I mean, we've done some pretty cool stuff, but we're not even close to where our potential is. Yeah. Where when we're, we're growing real fast, but we're not growing as fast as we're gonna be growing this time next year in the year. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>, we're moving fast. Just the small amount of where we've, from where we've been to where we are now is just a small fraction of where we're going. But just that journey alone, I mean, the amount of hate and haters that have come our way. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative> is so much, and if we let that weigh us down, we would be crushed.
Cindy (21:18):
Yes.
Tim (21:19):
We absolutely could not, as human beings bear the weight of all that hate. Mm. Wow. It would, we we would just be destroyed psychologically. Yeah. You wouldn't do anything, would be crushed anything. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. That's why Perspective, perspective on everything. Perspective. When you're about to go give a speech, you know, nervousness, excitement, perspective on, Hey, we just ran this problem, problems are opportunities. Perspective on haters. Haters are an indication that I'm moving in the right direction. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative> perspective will change everything and can transmute and, and what would feel like a negative energy and a negative emotion into an excited, positive emotion that moves you in the right direction. Yes. And, and if you use this, it's something you can start using right now, in this moment today. And that's not to say I do wanna qualify. It's not to say you will not feel that initial sting.
Tim (22:08):
Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. And it's not to say that negative thing won't come up and try to remind you that that little crab pulling you back in the bucket, that little dog barking you and that turtle internal voice is gonna come remind you, Hey, this hateful thing that was set you this hater, Hey, slow down. Don't do it. 'cause You're gonna have your own internal hater. Wow. Yeah. That's gonna try to limit you too. So you gotta, this has gotta be a habit you build. When you hear that externally, internally, anywhere where you start choosing as an action, as making the discipline and building the habit that will become automatic over time. Yeah. But at first will not be automatic. It'll have to be intentional. Mm-Hmm. <Affirmative>, it has to be trained is whether internal or external haters people hate on themselves internally. Like it just, all of us do this. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>, you have to build that discipline until it becomes automatic to translate the negative energy into an excitement and a positive energy saying as an indication that I'm moving in the right direction.
Cindy (23:07):
Ultimately, where your focus goes, your energy flows. So if your focus is on the naysayers and the negative, that's where all your energy and attention is gonna go as well. And we're on the journey to building some great things. Right. We want you to win in all areas of life and business. Yes. Your focus needs to be on your goals. Yes. And taking action and building momentum. So any emotion or any thought that you're giving to that negativity is taking away from the action and the momentum that you could be putting towards your goals. Robb, you so gate, it's robbing your goals.
Tim (23:36):
Wow.
Cindy (23:36):
So where your focus goes, your energy goes, ladies and gents, and this has been a really, really powerful episode. I'm like, mind blown,
Tim (23:43):
But this has been real for us. Yes. If you're listening to this episode, you have to understand the stuff we're saying up on here, <laugh>, like, on, like on this, on the, this isn't, it's real. This isn't like, hey, we read a book and like, Hey, you wanna say this on the podcast? Sounds kind of fun to talk about. I took a course, we've lived this stuff, we've gone through it. This is, this is applied knowledge
Cindy (24:05):
Still going through it still, still going through it, still getting haters. Yeah. That's
Tim (24:08):
Part of life. And we, and we still get to new levels where you have people that are like on a whole new level of hater. Mm-Hmm. <affirmative>. It's, but it's okay. Like this is part of the journey.
Cindy (24:17):
The mission's so big and the mission is why we keep going in the face of those haters. We're not stopping.
Tim (24:22):
Can't stop, won't stop <laugh>. It's like <laugh>. It's like I, I love getting this analogy is if you're gonna sign up to build something big and impactful in your life, you are signing up to be a boxer. If you are gonna be a box, Hey, I wanna be a boxer. I wanna be the best boxer in the world. I wanna, I wanna be a great boxer. And then you show up to training day one and you get punched in the face, you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, I didn't know I was gonna get punched in the face. Like, of course the goal is not to get punched in the face. Mm-Hmm. My goal is not to get haters, but I signed up for boxing, which means I'm gonna try to avoid punches, but it's part of the job. I'm gonna get punched in the face.
Tim (25:04):
My main goal when I'm stepping in the ring is not to avoid punches. My main goal is to knock the other dude out. My main goal, and part of that is, is dodging some punches. Like, I'm not gonna get up here and be a jerk and say things that are intentionally offensive to people, but I'm gonna go on my mission. I'm gonna go into the ring knowing, yeah, I'm gonna get punched and I'm probably gonna get punched a lot. And the better and better I can get at understanding how this game works and to understanding that's normal. And the understanding that everybody that ever builds something great in all of human history has haters anybody that ever wanted to create something great. The greater the mission, the greater the opposition. Yes. Period.
Cindy (25:40):
Period.
Tim (25:41):
And so if you're filling opposition and, and you're on a big mission, that means you're probably moving in the right direction. Mm-Hmm.
Cindy (25:47):
<Affirmative>, you're doing something right. For sure.
Tim (25:49):
<Laugh>, great episode. Mic drop.
Cindy (25:51):
Mic drop right there. We'll, we'll end it right there. That was powerful. That was powerful. I got motivated ladies and Jane, this was such a helpful reminder for me. I hope it was for you too, Tim. You were preaching, I was
Tim (26:02):
<Laugh>, I was receiving, I, I was preaching to myself, man. <Laugh>,
Cindy (26:05):
We definitely needed this reminder. And we hope, ladies and Jane, that this episode was impactful for you as well. Our goal with the takeover is to help you dominate in all areas of life and business. And we wanna equip you with the tools that are necessary for you to do that. So make sure that you are subscribed to the show. Make sure that you are following the show wherever you are listening, so that you can continue to win in all areas of life and business. This was the takeover with Tim and Cindy. Remember, domination is not a destination, it's a way of life. Stay winning.