Overcoming Fertility Challenges: A Personal Journey to Parenthood

Have you ever felt the worry and frustration of struggling to conceive a child? Like you, we've faced the arduous journey of fertility issues; it's a road littered with pitfalls, heartbreak, and immense challenges. In our three-part parenting podcast series, we kick-start the discussion with our personal journey to parenthood. Join us, Enrique and Linda, as we share our experiences, from dealing with Linda's cyst and resultant single ovary, navigating fertility treatments, to finally realizing the joy of parenthood.

We promise to take you behind the scenes of fertility treatments, offering a firsthand account of various procedures, including hystereoscopies, ovulation induction, insemination, and in-vitro fertilization. We found out in our journey that medical facts can sometimes be surprising, like when Linda's fallopian tubes were open contrary to the initial diagnosis. We also shed light on the three primary fertility treatments out there and their associated costs, hoping to make this complex process less intimidating.

We believe that managing the emotional aspects of fertility issues is just as critical as the physical ones. Thus, we delve into how we journeyed from feeling lonely and anxious to having a healthy baby and being parents. We underscore the importance of emotional support, a compassionate medical team, and the role of a supportive partner in maneuvering through infertility. We discuss our experiences with the emotional roller coaster that comes with trying to conceive, and our long, 10-year journey to parenthood. Join us for this intimate conversation, and let's navigate this journey together.

Transcript

Enrique Martin: 0:00

Hello everybody. My name is Enrique and this is Linda and honey.

Linda Novoa: 0:04

Let's do a podcast.

Enrique Martin: 0:11

Hello everybody and welcome to honey. Let's do a podcast. Today's our official first episode in the podcast and we're going to kick it out, starting with the three part series on parenting. Now part one of this series is going to be on our challenges getting pregnant, or you can call it our infertility issues. It wasn't for us as simple as just let's have sex and get it over with. It was a lot more difficult than that and we learned that the hard way.

Enrique Martin: 0:35

I know there's a lot of people out there that are having, you know, go through these things or are having these challenges when they're trying to start a family.

Enrique Martin: 0:44

A lot of our listeners out there probably you can relate to this or you probably met somebody in your life that has gone through this before and this actually sounds really familiar to you. So I think a lot of what we learned from it and what were challenges that happened that we had to kind of like navigate through them and stuff. I think that that's going to be a lot beneficial for you guys, as, if you guys are just going through this or you went through this, you might feel connected to what we're talking about or you know somebody who's going through this. These are information that you can give them, just from another person who went through it, in this case us, and it's information we can give you guys. You want to talk, you want to say something about this, linda, because I know mainly, obviously it affected both of us, but I know you got the hard part of the stick here.

Linda Novoa: 1:34

Yes, it was quite hard for me. It's kind of difficult to explain, but when you're going through it you don't think there might be a problem. But in my case particularly, there were some issues even before we even started, because I only have one ovary before we even started trying to conceive, so I was out of the bag.

Enrique Martin: 1:58

And I think I'm sorry to cut you up, but I think you can explain to the listeners. The reason for that was I had a cyst.

Linda Novoa: 2:06

Yeah, so exactly, I had a huge cyst and they had to remove the whole ovary. And that happened years before we even decided that we wanted to expand our family.

Enrique Martin: 2:17

And the doctor remember. The doctor said that this shouldn't be an issue for us getting pregnant Back in the days, because I know you asked them.

Linda Novoa: 2:25

Yes, that was a good question.

Enrique Martin: 2:27

You asked them hey, because we do want to start a family in the future. We have talked about it. Is this going to be an issue going forward? Are we going to be able to? You know, because that was one of your worries. I remember that point.

Linda Novoa: 2:41

And for some of you that might not be the case, but there are the process with it. I'm very happy with how it turned out. It was not as expensive as you might think. So here, hear us and listen to our experience, because you might find that you think that, oh, you don't have options you don't want to have, you might not be able to have kids. And if you listen to us, you might realize, yes, I might actually have a good chance, and that's actually one of the things my wife went through a little bit.

Enrique Martin: 3:13

She had a little bit of depression at one point because she thought she wasn't going to be able to have kids. She thought the only way we could was to the in vitro or IVF and that was extremely expensive. When we talked to the doctor about it and we're like, damn, we don't really want to pay 20 or 30,000 just for one try, and it's not even because that's I think it was what they didn't say was like 20% or 10% chance of success rate. Like it's not even a high.

Linda Novoa: 3:42

It was a low. It might be higher.

Enrique Martin: 3:44

I might be. I'll probably give you the exact stat at the end, but I know it wasn't that big of a number and I remember that we'll be paying all this money and it's not a sure thing. You know, it's like I don't know, like we're not millionaires either. So it's like, and I know that's why a lot of people who the only choices in vitro end up not having kids or end up using you know which again, we also we also thought about the adoption and actually, to be honest, we all we thought adopting would have been great.

Enrique Martin: 4:21

I think for anybody who thinks out there that was, I mean that would have been a beautiful experience for us.

Enrique Martin: 4:28

We would have loved to adopt and actually that would have been one of the options we could have gone through. If, at the end, you know our whatever we, we know our pathway wouldn't have been successful, that would have been maybe an option we would have pursued. So we did talk about it, but I feel like some people who maybe don't want to adopt right, because they want to have their own blood, flesh and blood, baby or whatever.

Enrique Martin: 4:53

They think, oh, the only options in vitro. You know we don't have the, the, the resources or the economic. You know we don't have the financial stability to to to do it in vitro, and they feel like, oh, it's over, I mean we can't have kids. You know it's done and they get frustrated and all this stuff right.

Linda Novoa: 5:11

Yeah, and I have a few friends that they have been trying and they have not been successful and they go with that route. Oh, we are not going to be able to have kids, just get married with that option. But they don't really do the due diligence I will say to to go that extra little mile and they really, really want to have kids on their own. There are really options out there. You just need to go and find them. Also, something that was very helpful for us was that we try to fertility facilities. So the first one I'm allowed to say which one is- I mean, I don't, I don't see why it was it was Texas Fertility Institute.

Enrique Martin: 5:57

So, by the way, just for our viewers out there. We do live in Houston, Texas, so that's why most of the names we would say are related to Texas. Yeah, but we do live in Houston, texas, so that's where our whatever we talked about is going to be in this location.

Linda Novoa: 6:14

Yes, so the first one we did was Texas Fertility Institute and the process was very I feel like like a number. To be honest, I'm not going to lie to you, I feel like I was just another number and the way that they gave me the service, this is a disappoint, some kind of service. I wouldn't say I was very happy. It took very long from one appointment to the other one, like two months, and I was just really not impressed by it. Also, they what was the name of the? Actually we're here.

Enrique Martin: 7:01

Of what?

Linda Novoa: 7:02

They did. One of the of the tests was in the Texas Fertility.

Enrique Martin: 7:07

Wasn't that the test of the, of the, that hysteroscopy.

Linda Novoa: 7:11

No, the hysteroscopy, ah the hysteroscopy.

Enrique Martin: 7:13

Yeah, which is the one where they put a just so for you, you guys know out there, this is the one that they. They put a catheter inside your vagina, you know, and they inject saltwater into your uterus and then it expands the uterus and then they have a clearer ultrasound. And this is for what is it that they were looking with these things?

Linda Novoa: 7:33

So they were looking if there was a clear path from the egg to pass and get all the way to the uterus. And what they found was, well, first, they didn't put any anesthesia, they didn't put anything. So it did hurt quite a lot. So I'm not sure if they did it right. So that's that's what I'm going. And also, when they did it, um, uh, the side that I don't have an ovary, it flushed, it went perfectly well, but the side that I do have an ovary was, it was blocked. It was not the liquid fluid didn't pass through that side of the canal or the fallopian tube. Let's go so that that was an issue, because the side that I do have an ovary, um, apparently it was blocked and I at that point, all of my options were closed and I was pretty much not going to be able to get pregnant naturally.

Enrique Martin: 8:42

So basically, what um from what I understood, because obviously she she explained to me was that she only had one, you know, one, one um one ovary and the fallopian tube from that ovary right Mm hmm, Uh, that was apparently clogged or there was no liquid going through the little when I did, when they did the the procedure was closed, and so we were like ooh, so it's closed, so it's blocked, or whatever. So did they? Did they tell you that they have to do like a surgery or something?

Linda Novoa: 9:15

Yes, what was it Like? They can do a surgery to open that tube, or they or and they wanted to try to move the other fallopian tube to the other side. But that, let me just tell you, a fallopian tube is like like a piece of string from the clothes is very, very thin. Doing a surgery to that level is just very risky. And when I mentioned to other people they were like what Did they do that? And sounds weird.

Enrique Martin: 9:48

I didn't think that's that's possible, right yeah?

Linda Novoa: 9:52

And actually the other doctor said, hmm, that doesn't sound good.

Enrique Martin: 9:56

Yeah, but I think he actually said it. I yeah, he did.

Linda Novoa: 10:00

Anyway. Anyway, we went to that doctor and uh, so we didn't have the best um, my experience I wouldn't say it was the best and had to wait a long time. Everything was like too much and I was not feeling very well. In fact, I cried multiple times during the process. And then uh and Rika, uh, teach, so I have a.

Enrique Martin: 10:24

I have a kid for this.

Enrique Martin: 10:27

I won't say the names because uh you know these are clients of mine and I want to give away the information. But uh, I, you know, I, I'm a tennis coach that said it before in the introductory episode and I have, uh, you know, a kid I teach, uh, been teaching for a while. The parents are, you know, I'm pretty good friends with the parents and stuff and I didn't know this, but the dad was a fertility doctor and I know the family. So I've been talking around and be telling, I've been telling them what we've gone through and our situation and the, the, the place that Linda's going and all this stuff. And then the, the, the wife tells me, hey, you do know, uh, my husband is a is a fertility doctor.

Enrique Martin: 11:08

And I'm like, really no, I didn't know that. And then they're like, yeah, and then I'm like, well, listen, we're having all this issue, maybe we should just go to his uh, to his clinic or something, and maybe they can evaluate us there. So we ended up doing that and then maybe Linda can. Maybe you can just finish. Now the other part of the story.

Linda Novoa: 11:28

Yeah, so once we started going to the second facility, which is the Houston fertility Institute, I think it's just very different I think that's the name to be honest, don't quote me Um so that the process, the care in the facility, was so much better. The people was for nicer, kinder, the process was a lot faster and I work, so my time is very important. I don't want to be sitting there for a long time because I have things to do. So, uh, the fact that they were able to do everything before my time to start work, it was great because I was able to make it to fit it within my agenda, my daily agenda. So they did a few more tests and I think they did a few more for Enrique, and they gather all the data from the old facility and the new facility.

Enrique Martin: 12:33

So for me, uh, the test was your typical and this is, guys, listen, in this episode I won't be talking as much because it's mostly let's be honest, guys it's mostly, uh, the woman side who goes through these most of these hurdles. But the test that they'll do, let's say, if there's a guys out there and you're having issues, the test that will run over you is like you see in the movies, they're just going to get a sperm count, okay, they're going to see how your sperm count is. If you have a high sperm count, uh, you know, uh, how much you have, uh, what you know, and apparently I was good in all those standards that they were looking for. I was good in those, okay, and the and the counts and the quantity and all that stuff. So, my, I was in the issue and terms according to them.

Enrique Martin: 13:14

So that, and that was basically the only thing based on the, on the guy the only thing that me, the male, had to make sure that I was fine, that's it. But from my end, everything else is the woman's, and that's why this is mostly you know it's mostly going to be Linda giving her experience.

Linda Novoa: 13:34

So when they did the run, all of the tests, uh, they did mention that there might be a possibility that the test run in the other facility might be done wrong and that he wanted to do something different. Uh, and what's the name of that one? This is Toscopy, I think.

Enrique Martin: 13:52

Historoscopy.

Linda Novoa: 13:53

Historoscopy.

Enrique Martin: 13:55

So so that's uh again, this is just a little bit of a information for our viewers out there. That's when they put a you know, like it's like a little telescope, they put through the, through the vagina, then they're going to, you know, they're going to check over there and go into your uterus and then what they do is that they see if there's polyps, and if there are polyps they can remove it. So it's basically just to take a look at the uterus like a little, like I said, like a little camera, little telescope. They go in there and then they check and if there's anything wrong in the polyps or whatever, they can remove them.

Linda Novoa: 14:28

But in that particular um treatment. They were going to see if they could open the fallopian tube.

Enrique Martin: 14:37

That was the original Right. Cause. The other place told you that it was closed.

Linda Novoa: 14:41

Yeah, cause there were no nothing showing up in any city scan or any uh sonogram. There were no polyps or anything showing. So when he did that, uh, what's the name? Again?

Enrique Martin: 14:55

Historoscopy.

Linda Novoa: 14:57

Uh, he didn't found any problems in the fallopian tube. The fallopian tube was completely open.

Enrique Martin: 15:03

And this is actually a funny story, guys, cause we're ringing. I know these, I know these people, so I remember I was in the, my wife, they took her up, they took her in for the small little procedure uh, what they had to? They had to sedate her. I think you had full anesthesia right Full anesthesia.

Enrique Martin: 15:20

Yeah, so they had to completely sedate her for this and I, you know, I was in the waiting room, in the lobby room, whatever you want to call it, and as soon as they're doing it, the doctor texts me. Literally as they're doing it, he texts me like I don't know, five minutes afterwards or something we're clear, fallopian tubes is clear. And he gives me a thumbs up and I'm like okay, so that's what she's like, she's saying that. So we found out at the same time, apparently, when they checked, they were clear that the fallopian tube was clear. So that was going to be an issue.

Linda Novoa: 15:52

So and just going back, the other facility told me that it was closed, so that just you have to take it with a grain of salt this information, or the procedure. You need to know how good or the different doctor. You have to do your research. I guess In our case we were very lucky. There were clients of my husband and they were very good at the same time, so that's great so.

Linda Novoa: 16:18

But on the other hand, they did found the fallopian tube open great. But they found very tiny polyps. They did find three of them and because the procedure, the way it was, was with the way that procedure works, they were able to remove all of the polyps that they found. So I did I have a little bit of pain at the end, but I was very sedated. It's like I couldn't remember much, but I do remember I think we recorded that I was very, very, very happy after the procedure when I woke up. So that was the process for those two. We had to do those two procedures and after that the doctor did mention that after that procedure the chances of getting pregnant naturally are very high, and we were already.

Enrique Martin: 17:20

Yes, so just to piggyback on what she's saying, what he said is basically that basically we should try. Yes after the procedure, like in need, within two weeks, was it like he said that, like basically the next two weeks after they do that particular procedure? Again, it's a hystereoscopy. Basically, it improves your chances of getting pregnant, obviously even more, so that they remove the polyps right. But basically it's like you have a little window, like a little window where your probability is a little higher.

Linda Novoa: 17:54

Yes, and then during that next month he mentioned that once I get my period I had to let him know immediately because we were going to start trying ovulation induction. I think skull.

Enrique Martin: 18:08

Yes.

Linda Novoa: 18:09

And we were going to do clomid specifically.

Enrique Martin: 18:12

That's like a pill, right? You take oral pill, yes, and that helps with what With like promote the ovulation. Okay, yeah.

Linda Novoa: 18:23

Okay.

Enrique Martin: 18:24

So, basically, guys, just so you go, there's three. There's actually three procedures or three ways. I know if you're having issues with with getting pregnant. Once, though, what my wife just said, which is ovulation induction, and the other ones when they do an insemination right at the uterus. So they go and they, you know, they put the sperm right there, they grab your spleen, they directly put it right with the where, the where the egg is right.

Enrique Martin: 18:55

And then the last one is the in vitro, which is a lot, a lot. A lot of people know, which is when they take your egg and they put it like a little container outside so they remove your egg, they grab one of your eggs and then they grab a sperm and then then they, you know, contain environment, they. So basically, it's more like it's not natural right, it's just yeah, they make sure to fecundate.

Enrique Martin: 19:17

Yeah, they make sure it's and then they have it all in a little place where it's where it's secure and it's, all you know, checked, and all this stuff, and then, when it does happen, then they put it back in the uterus. Yes, that's what normally in vitro would be, but that's the most expensive one, obviously.

Linda Novoa: 19:34

So there are different levels and they are different price range for all of them and even before those treatments. There are some procedures that you can do to try if those works and those are also less expensive. So there are different ways that you can. If you're really looking to get pregnant because you want to have your own blood and flesh or whatever reason you want and you're having issues, you just want to start a family.

Enrique Martin: 20:02

Yeah, you want to start a family and you're having issues like we did.

Linda Novoa: 20:06

Actually we were doing a little bit of research and we found out that one in five women have problems with getting pregnant in the first place during the first year alone. So just getting pregnant in one full year one in five females have problems 20%. Yes, that's a huge number.

Enrique Martin: 20:28

And also I. I this has nothing to do with the problem, but it's also like something that can happen, which is that it's a when we're looking for. That information is actually a pretty interesting fact, because I wasn't even aware of this. But apparently 10 to 15 out of 100. So that's like 10 to 15% have miscarriages. You know that.

Enrique Martin: 20:50

Well, I do know that because I have a lot of friends that know what I'm saying For me that's a crazy stat because I thought that would be lower, but actually 10 to 15%, it's a pretty high number.

Linda Novoa: 21:02

It's a big number.

Enrique Martin: 21:03

Yeah, and we actually, when we actually got, when we actually ended up getting pregnant, I think one of the things we had at our yeah, but I'll get there. I'll get there, Okay but I you know what I'm going to- talk about.

Linda Novoa: 21:17

Yes, I know you're going to talk about it.

Enrique Martin: 21:19

So yeah, just keep going.

Linda Novoa: 21:20

So, obviously, because he mentioned that we have that window and we were going to do the climate right after, like right the next month, as soon as I get my first period, we were going to start climate. So I, you know, I am very organized, so I track my period and I have here the one that I use to track my period and to track ovulation. To track everything, there are this little test that you can buy, actually by my on Amazon. The brand is pre mom. It comes with an app. It's a free app and it has a lot of tests.

Linda Novoa: 21:59

Some tests are for ovulation and there are other tests that are for testing if you are pregnant or not. So I would do these tests when I'm close to my ovulation time to check when is the peak time. So when is the peak time? That's really when you want to have, you know your intimacy with your partner and to make sure that the X is ficundated. So I did this test for a very long time but during that month I was extremely picky, making sure that I was doing tests, especially during that little window when I knew that the ovulation was very close. I was doing it like over almost two hours to make sure that the window was the right one, and then that's pretty much how we got pregnant.

Enrique Martin: 22:53

Literally as soon as we tried again after that procedure, it was a ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding ding.

Linda Novoa: 23:03

Yeah, that was the winner.

Enrique Martin: 23:05

That was the winner Because literally we I don't know, I mean because we might have tried we probably tried more than what I'm just saying that she never got another period after that.

Linda Novoa: 23:16

I mean it.

Enrique Martin: 23:17

Just that's what I mean, literally it was like I literally called a doctor and I said, man, this is like this was like what I mean. It's like Boodoo or like a magic or something. What happened here? Like, literally, we can, for the life of us, we couldn't. And all of a sudden, you know we never saw. She never saw another period. Yeah, like 12 months so it because you know, after you had the baby then you have another.

Linda Novoa: 23:41

You don't have it for like you know, for like six months you didn't have it for like almost then, 16 or 18 months or something, I don't know. It's a long time.

Enrique Martin: 23:52

But yeah, so that was. That was that.

Linda Novoa: 23:56

You know, it was pretty interesting Because it literally happened, just like that right away, because we were going to start a climate and I never got to try a climate. No, you never did.

Enrique Martin: 24:06

Because I mean you never got another, you never got another period, and also I was a little bit skeptical with climate because I did my research and climate.

Linda Novoa: 24:16

if you take climate you might get more than one, and I already have a lot of family members that have twins.

Linda Novoa: 24:26

So I was already very scared to try climate in the first place, because the chances might get even higher, and I already have really high percent, because I have family from both sides are twins. So yeah, that's that Then. Another thing that happened is that after we got pregnant naturally which was great, because I only have one ovary I was not producing enough hormones, so that was a huge issue, and let me explain why this is important.

Enrique Martin: 25:05

So the hormone? I believe that it was estrogen, right the one that you were like.

Linda Novoa: 25:10

Estrogen was the one that was low.

Enrique Martin: 25:12

And basically guys. So estrogen is the one that helps grow and maintain the. The lining, I think, is the endometrial lining or something like that. So it basically helps sustain the pregnancy. So if your estrogen goes low, you have a higher risk of losing or having a miscarriage, or you know. You kind of know. So it kind of was also lucky for us that we were doing all this through a fertility institute, because let's say, we would have done it without a fertility institute.

Enrique Martin: 25:44

So just you know, guys, when you go to one of these facilities like a fertility or whatever. Normally, in a normal scenario, your wife gets pregnant, or you know your significant other gets pregnant and what happens is that you go to your the lady doctor what's she called? Again the OBGYN. Okay, so you go to the lady doctor and she goes and checks you and like, oh yeah, she's done it. She runs some blood work on this with that. Oh yeah, look you are, you are pregnant. You know, these hormones went up, it's positive, you're good, you're pregnant. Okay, so what's the next step? Okay, they'll see me in, like how many?

Linda Novoa: 26:22

weeks.

Enrique Martin: 26:23

Well, we no, no wait, but I think she sees you again.

Linda Novoa: 26:26

No, no, no, no, 19 weeks or something like that.

Enrique Martin: 26:29

She sees you quick, I think, like two or three weeks after that, for us the first ultrasound, I think.

Linda Novoa: 26:37

Maybe I think so Okay.

Enrique Martin: 26:39

But I know it's one and then you don't see her for a while. So until you get to like your last, I think your last trimester, in the last trimester, I think, you see her more often.

Linda Novoa: 26:53

When you.

Enrique Martin: 26:54

I'm talking about when you're not in any facility. This is when you're just.

Enrique Martin: 26:59

You know you're normal it happened you had pregnant and you just go to the OBGYN or whatever and this is it. So at the beginning, you don't see, you're not seeing your doctor that frequently, so they cannot catch, so they cannot know if your estrogens are low or whatever, because they're not checking you constantly or regularly. However, we got lucky because when you go to one of these facilities, like a fertility institute or something they're, you're basically seeing every two weeks or every week or every two weeks, something like that.

Linda Novoa: 27:27

No, I think it was every week, right Every other day.

Enrique Martin: 27:31

Really, yes, I thought, oh, then it got.

Linda Novoa: 27:34

then it got bumped down to I had to go every other day and they will do blood work and so they will just take some blood, and I have very fine veins, so they had to do it in my hands and so they did.

Linda Novoa: 27:51

They did take blood work and because it's every other day they are monitoring yeah, they monitor very closely your hormone levels and how they are growing and what is the standard, and that's how they are able to know if your levels are better or not. They are not raising enough and there is something going on. Because I only have one ovary, the chances are higher of having low hormone levels. So they were able to get it on time and they gave me pretty much like medications to what was.

Enrique Martin: 28:29

Yeah, you get an estrogen. I think it was a pill, yeah it's called estrogiole.

Linda Novoa: 28:34

I still have it and that's what they gave. They gave me that medication and I have to take it let me see here three times a day. So I will take it three times a day for the whole since the moment they gave.

Enrique Martin: 28:51

But I think it was basically only the first trimester.

Enrique Martin: 28:54

Only the first time, because I think after that you know, the pregnancy really gets strong, so your chances of miscarriage really go down a lot. You have a lot more chances on your first trimester to have any complications or miscarriage complications in the pregnancy. After that they drop significantly lower on your second trimester and they drop even more on your third trimester. So that's why a lot of people you hear and you know, a lot of people you know or might know, just don't, don't say anything until they reach their second trimester.

Enrique Martin: 29:27

Because, because then let's say, you go and you say, hey, yeah, we're pregnant, and you tell it to everybody and then all of a sudden you lost it. Yeah, and then, apart from having to, deal with all the pain and suffering yourself, then everybody's going to be asking you hey, how's the pregnancy going?

Linda Novoa: 29:45

Hey, how you guys do it, and then all of a sudden you're like yeah we lost it?

Enrique Martin: 29:50

Yeah, we lost it.

Linda Novoa: 29:52

In fact we did worse. We did that we didn't mention to the public.

Enrique Martin: 29:55

No, we just mentioned it to our family and close people, you know very family. But we didn't put it in social media. We didn't do anything. We didn't want to because we didn't want to deal with. Something happened with the situation where everybody asking you about it, which is what's just going to happen. It's just natural.

Linda Novoa: 30:12

And we were we already were dealing with so many things Before we even got pregnant that it was just we just didn't want it to add more troubles to our story. We just wanted to make it as smooth as possible with the situation. We were just dealing with the situation and try to make it work, and that's exactly what we did. So after that, after we finished that first trimester, then everything was smooth.

Enrique Martin: 30:48

Yeah, it was smooth sailing from there.

Linda Novoa: 30:50

Yeah, it was just like a regular process after that point Once, because they, they, when you are infertility, they keep you infertility treatments or they keep monitoring, monitoring you during that whole first trimester, that once you move to the second trimester, they, they call it graduation and that's when you go to your regular. Yeah.

Enrique Martin: 31:16

I always, I always struggle with this name. That's why I always say the lady doctor, because the lady doctor, because I know it's OBGYN or something like that.

Linda Novoa: 31:25

I call it OBGYN.

Enrique Martin: 31:26

Well, yeah, I mean you can call it. Listen, the correct name is out there it's. I'm pretty sure it's OBGYN or OBG or whatever.

Linda Novoa: 31:36

We're not doctors, but I'll just call it the lady doctor.

Enrique Martin: 31:38

Okay, it's like you have the guy doctor, we had the lady doctor, that's. Let's just call it like that. Well, that's the way I call it. But anyway, as soon as you get past your first trimester, you get a graduation. They gave you like this little bag with all this little stuff for the pregnancy and extra whatever, and then they just send you off and you got to give her the name of your doctor, and then they just give all this information, they transfer it to their office and, boom, you just continue with them in the normal pace that everybody else would. So basically, this is more mostly you're going to be using this treatment or this fertility institutes mostly for your first trimester. Once you get past that, like I said, the chances of complications go down significantly. So you're, they're just going to, you don't need them anymore, so that you just don't need to keep going there, unless obviously they see that something's going on or something's wrong when the maybe you know, maybe they, they don't, they don't graduate you, let's put it like that.

Enrique Martin: 32:38

So maybe you still have to do other stuff.

Linda Novoa: 32:40

But with fertility I mean the chances to losing the baby are very, very slim because they are really on top of you.

Enrique Martin: 32:49

And obviously it's a it's more expensive because you have to see them more often and obviously, guys, every visit is catching, catching.

Enrique Martin: 32:56

You're going to have some money that you have to spend. It's just normal. So obviously you're going to have to spend more money. But for peace of mind and specifically if you're having issues, think about it guys, let's. Let's be real for a second here. If you're having issues getting pregnant, let's say you've been trying for a year, you've been trying for two years, you've lost all hope. All of a sudden this miracle happens and you do get pregnant. You obviously want to do your best to not have any issues with it. So if you have to pay a little more, it's worth it. Then just not doing it, trying to be a little more, you know lose or spend less money. And then you have this issue.

Enrique Martin: 33:41

Obviously, I'm not talking about if you're financially not capable to support it. If you can't do it, that's a different ball game. Okay, because you can do. You had you guys have to do whatever you're financially capable of doing. You're not going to be doing something out there that you just can't do because it'll ruin everything else. Okay, but if you're capable of paying it and you're capable of supporting this extra, fine, extra, you know spending, or whatever, it's worth it. Trust me, because they do check every time. It's like being hold it by your hand, like somebody's holding you by your hand as you go through this. So it's really, really, really. You feel a lot.

Enrique Martin: 34:23

I know my wife feel a lot more like secure and a lot more like less stressed out, because she felt like, yes, if something happens they'll know, they'll know and we'll we can assess it. Yeah, it was just kind of what happened with the pill, right? Because she, you know, one day everything was going fine with the hormones and then, I think, one day, it started going down.

Linda Novoa: 34:46

I don't know if it didn't go down, it just didn't keep going up, he was starting to decrease and the next visit it was just on the border number.

Enrique Martin: 34:58

And that's when he was like okay, I'm going to give you this, okay, let's give you the pill here, so it'll help. And then, after the pill, it got boosted up again and you got normal.

Linda Novoa: 35:06

And then yeah, and just to give you a heads up, if I wouldn't take the pills I probably wouldn't have lost my baby and man. I'm very grateful that that we did. We did it the way we did it Because I have a beautiful daughter and her name is Victoria Victoria. Sofia.

Enrique Martin: 35:25

And yeah, like my wife said, it went smooth sailing ever since then and her second trimester, third trimester, everything went fine and until we reach the birth, and that's a another interesting story. But I think we're not touching that one today, right? No, because that's gonna be in part two. But is there anything else you want to talk about before you know, we kind of wrap this up? Is there anything else you want to talk about this? You know all this, what we went through and all these situations, maybe for our listeners I don't know.

Linda Novoa: 35:56

I think we covered a lot of it, but I don't know if maybe there's an Well there is an aspect that we have not talked about and is the emotional aspect for females, is a very lonely path. I didn't want it, to talk about it with nobody, so I, what I would do to Get those feelings out is that I will record myself and, and that's how I took out those feelings. But but the motion, especially when, when they give you many bad news, and that 10, and that in my case, all of those bad news happened on the first facility. It was, I felt, hopeless. I feel like my basic function of Reproduction, I was not able to fulfill it. So you do feel like your body is not Working well and you don't work well, or something like that. That.

Enrique Martin: 36:55

That actually basically, in a Colloquial terms, what she's trying to say is you feel like a failure? Yes, I know she doesn't want to say it and I know yes, no, that's exactly hard. It's kind of hard to say it and it's kind of you know it can be mean, but that's basically what she's saying, that she feels like I actually did, said that word in one of my recordings because that's exactly how I felt.

Linda Novoa: 37:20

That's the part that is the hardest during this process. It's not the money, it's not all of the visits that you have to give the doctor is the emotional aspect. How are you able to handle? Most of the time you Don't want to talk these things with your husband because he's also dealing with some issues and you already feel like you're the failure and and he wants the kid, he wants the baby of his own blood. So you don't want to tell those things to him.

Enrique Martin: 37:52

But you don't want to tell that, these things to anybody honestly and the only thing I can say in regards to the males perspective here is that please, guys, be a little bit of, don't be dickheads, don't be assholes. Sometimes we act like you know, like we want this, this is it, and, and if it doesn't happen, a lot of guys out there and I know, they're not talking about.

Enrique Martin: 38:16

I'm not talking about a hundred percent of you guys, but I am talking about a lot of people out there. Males Blame it on their wife or blame it on their significant others, like, ah, we can't have a kid. What's wrong with you? Whatever you know, they're just act like assholes. Now, they're already going through a lot. Like she said, she felt like a failure, she felt like her body that wasn't working correctly. Yada, yada, yada. They're already going through a lot. They don't need your asshole this to go at them. Okay, you guys need to treat her nice. You guys need to understand the situation. Put yourself in their shoes. Okay, imagine you were the woman. Okay, that's what you got to do. And and I, like I told, I always told my wife this from the start I, I always I wanted a kid, right, I cannot deny that.

Enrique Martin: 39:04

But if it didn't happen, I Wasn't you know, I was like this is okay, don't worry about it. You know, like it's fine, we can keep trying. We can try a different method if we can't pay the one that it. That's why we started looking at all the options with adopting, with, but because I was fine, I wasn't. You know, if that's our case, that's our case and we can't do anything about it. That's what God gave us. Well, that's fine.

Enrique Martin: 39:32

You know, like it is what it is, but just please for the guys out there, be a little bit, you know, just be sensitive, you know just just empathy. Yeah like just what she says. I feel like a lot of women were in the situation that my wife was. They'll feel this way or similar to this way, so they need the partner to be really supportive of them, not to be, not to alienate or not to, you know, kind of separate a little bit or get frustrated with the situation or accuse her.

Enrique Martin: 40:08

Just support them. That's basically. It Just just be part of it. And just like you listen, give her positive reinforcement, all this stuff and, just you know, try to build her up.

Linda Novoa: 40:17

Not, you're not not keep, you know, throwing her down more and, I think, the main reason why I felt so, such a failure and and I have to throw this my husband wanted to have a kid, since, since we met, yeah. He has always been very vocal about having a family, and I was the one that I keep pushing, I'm pushing because my wife wasn't really she wasn't really that fond of kids.

Enrique Martin: 40:47

Let's be honest.

Linda Novoa: 40:49

No, I'm not. To the exception of my daughter, I'm still not fond of many. You got enough.

Enrique Martin: 40:53

Let's, you've gotten a little better about it. No, but you've gotten better about it, because I've seen her now in the daycare and Interacting with other kids and she's gotten way better. Because before before a kid will be screaming. Okay, we need to disappear, yeah, and we need to leave, we need to get out of the store we need to see was one of those.

Linda Novoa: 41:18

Yes.

Enrique Martin: 41:18

Okay, so Guess how hard it was for me to try to convince her. This has been a challenge for me. Yeah to try to convince her to have a kid.

Linda Novoa: 41:27

So it took him technically 10 years to convince me to have kids, and it did. The main reason why I Didn't want to have kids is because I wanted to finish my career first. So I finished my career, I didn't have many excuses to give him to extend me getting pregnant and giving him a family or expanding our family. So when the time came and I was not able to get pregnant, can you imagine how I was feeling at that point? I Failed to my husband that has been trying To convince me to get pregnant for the last 10 years. That's a lot of time.

Enrique Martin: 42:13

Yes, we're both. For a little context here, we're both 36. Well, my wife turns 36 this month, but she's 35, so I'm 36. So basically, since we were like 26, 26, mid-20s, let's put it like that mid-20s.

Linda Novoa: 42:29

Yeah, so yeah, that's just. I will say that give enough information for today's episode.

Enrique Martin: 42:37

So you think that wraps it up.

Linda Novoa: 42:39

Yes, for sure, because it's a long.

Enrique Martin: 42:42

This is a long conversation already, but basically that's kind of like what we wanted to talk about. Their first part, which was just like what we talked through, which is basically our issues or our complications in getting pregnant, what we had to do, our infertility issues and all this stuff. I think in total it took us. It wasn't as bad as other people we know, but it took us around six to seven months to get pregnant and if you go to the numbers out there, this is probably pretty reasonable for a lot of people to take this long. So you might feel like, oh, why are they talking about infertility? But it's because the context we gave you, because if we would have just kept trying, it wasn't gonna happen. It could have taken us two years. Okay, the reason is we acted quickly. We went and checked what was going on.

Linda Novoa: 43:38

We went and you were proactive.

Enrique Martin: 43:41

We got checked. Basically and this is a little bit of a little nugget of information for everybody out there If you're trying to get pregnant, I would suggest the guy go get a sperm counter, go get checked, just to know everything's good in your end, and then the woman go get checked, maybe do that hysterosynography and which is just like I said, like getting a little liquid. They check everything's, you know everything the uterus, fine, whatever, and then that's fine. And then keep, go try. That doesn't take, but it's just-.

Enrique Martin: 44:11

That's not gonna cause us it's just a little safety for you to know that everything's working fine and everything's is okay. And then if you can't get pregnant, if you keep trying and trying and trying and it doesn't get pregnant, then you can look into other options. The thing is, since we did pre-prep early and we went and got checked, that's when she found out oh wait, this tube is closed. And also it's because, like she said, she already had an ovary removed, so she already had a little bit of a-.

Linda Novoa: 44:38

A problem.

Enrique Martin: 44:39

Like wasn't sure about this already. So she's like okay, I have this little, you know doubt that it's gonna go, everything's gonna go well. So let me go get checked first. So just like I said, a little nugget of information. Please go get checked, you know, just for your own peace of mind, that your everybody's good, your count's good, the woman's good, everything's okay go.

Enrique Martin: 45:03

Normally, again, this is more something you would check at the later stages. If you're really young, the chances are that everything's perfect with you and nothing's fine. The probability is lower as you get older, like us. When she got pregnant, she was 34.

Enrique Martin: 45:18

So, we're already getting close to mid-30s. Okay, it's not like she was 20 or 21 or 22, which is pretty young. At that age she probably won't have any issues. She would have had both ovaries if we were to try to 23. Okay, so that's that, but anyway, so that about wraps it up again for today.

Enrique Martin: 45:38

Again, part two we're gonna be talking about next Wednesday and that's gonna be covering postpartum depression and that's gonna be covering our birth story. I know my wife really wants to talk about that postpartum depression. She feels like a lot of the listeners, lady listeners out there woman, this is gonna be really beneficial for you guys. So that's gonna be extremely interesting for you guys and it's gonna be a cool one for you guys to look for. Next Wednesday, Again, we're gonna be talking about birth story and postpartum depression. Okay, we really wanna thank you guys for listening to us today. I hope we've been bored you. I think it was fun for us. It was really good for us to take this and just release it out, right Sometimes, for this podcast has been great for us to just express and just take away things that we have in our chest. That's make us gonna feel better and released all that tension that we have. I really hope you guys enjoy this. It was fun for us.

Linda Novoa: 46:36

And also if you have, if you're going through this situation or if you know somebody that is going through this situation and you just want to let us know, or if you think that there's some-.

Enrique Martin: 46:50

Maybe you have any ideas about stuff they wanna let us know, maybe.

Linda Novoa: 46:54

Exactly. If you wanna know something specifically and you just want to ask us, you can use our Instagram to let us know. Hey, we are going through this situation. What was your experience, and we can explain that in a podcast or also you can send us.

Enrique Martin: 47:09

We have the email. Honey, let's do a podcast at gmailcom. We're also gonna put it. You're watching this on YouTube, where I'm gonna put that up in the. I'm gonna put it up in the video right now At honey, let's do a podcast. That's our Gmail. Honey, let's do a podcast at gmailcom. And our Instagram is at honey, let's do a podcast.

Enrique Martin: 47:28

So any of those two you can, you can reach us out. Maybe you have any recommendations or, like you said, you wanna let us know a question about today's episode or about questions to Linda.

Linda Novoa: 47:40

Or if there was something that you took that you found very, very helpful for you in this podcast, just let us know, because that for us, especially for me, it is very important to to see that I'm helping somebody else, and if that's is that you if you want to let me know, that will be, that will make me very happy, because that means that by doing this podcast, I'm helping others, and that's what it's all about.

Enrique Martin: 48:09

So yeah, and again, thank you guys all for listening today. Hope you have you know, you had an amazing time with us and listening to us. We'll see you next Wednesday. Have a blessed day, guys, see ya. ["mute Noisemic from BA Jungle直我要他是某種人樊道沒有難過別 Beauty you. You Play 척飛 Fire with me". T 몫 pushlled me hard] you