Mental and emotional preparation for childbirth is just as important as physical preparation. In this episode, we will share 10 ways which will help create a happy and safe environment for the birthing parent and support team.
Visit our website, here: https://birthlearning.com/ Follow us on Facebook at Birth Learning Follow us on Instagram at @birthlearning
Show Credits
Host: Angie Rosier Music: Michael Hicks Photographer: Toni Walker Episode Artwork: Nick Greenwood Producer: Gillian Rosier Voiceover: Ryan Parker
Mental and emotional preparation for childbirth is just as important as physical preparation. In this episode, we will share 10 ways which will help create a happy and safe environment for the birthing parent and support team.
Visit our website, here: https://birthlearning.com/ Follow us on Facebook at Birth Learning Follow us on Instagram at @birthlearning
Show Credits
Host: Angie Rosier Music: Michael Hicks Photographer: Toni Walker Episode Artwork: Nick Greenwood Producer: Gillian Rosier Voiceover: Ryan Parker
Speaker 1:
Welcome to the Ordinary Doula Podcast with Angie Rozier, hosted by Birth Learning, where we help prepare folks for labor and birth with expertise coming from 20 years of experience in a busy doula practice Helping thousands of people prepare for labor, providing essential knowledge and tools for positive and empowering birth experiences.
Speaker 2:
Hello and welcome to the Ordinary Doula Podcast. I am your host, angie Rozier, and we are sponsored by Birth Learning. Hope you are having a great day. I don't know where you're at in. You know in your if you're pregnant, if you're postpartum, if you're a doula, if you're someone who's used a doula, if you know if you're just a crazy old birth junkie like myself. But welcome, welcome today. We're glad you're here.
Speaker 2:
So today I want to talk a little bit about mental preparation, mental and emotional preparation for childbirth and I think this a lot of people go into the childbirth with a little bit of trepidation and uncertainty. They're nervous about some things. There's a lot of unknowns when we anticipate childbirth. So we're going to go through some basic human needs today there are 10 that we're going to briefly touch on and how they can be met during childbirth and what you can do now to make sure that your basic human needs are met during childbirth. So I want you to think first of what you value, or what you anticipate valuing about your childbirth experience while you're in labor. So what do you value about that, what do you want out of that and, based on what you value that's what's important to you, your priorities for your experience. I want you to next think of what it is that you need to meet, what it is that you value. So, based on the priorities or the expectations you have of childbirth, what do you need to fulfill those? And then, third, what are you going to do? What will you do in order to kind of put those into place? So a lot of times we think about our birth team. They are definitely going to be something, hopefully, that we value and consider. Who it is that's on your birth team, who's going to be supporting you through this, who's going to be educating you, who's going to be guiding you, who's going to be advising you through this experience, and hopefully they will be a piece of meeting these human needs. So these human needs, I'm going to run through them briefly and then we'll attach a little bit of birth meaning to every single one of them.
Speaker 2:
So basic human needs are belonging. We have the need to belong, the need for purpose, for safety, need for purpose for safety, for trust, for connection, for autonomy, for respect, a need for self-expression, a need for fun or play, and then a need for rest or respite. So we're going to go through each of those 10 human needs and see how they translate to the birth experience and how those needs are going to be met. So these will hope. These needs hope to be met by what you value, what your priorities are, what you're going to do to get these needs met so that you are having a positive human experience. So belonging. We want to definitely belong to our own birth experience.
Speaker 2:
If you're the person having a baby, you are a pivotal role to that. You are the one doing the most preparation physical, emotional, mental, spiritual preparation for childbirth. So you want to belong in that space and that may include getting some education, some information, so that you feel like you belong in that space, that space of birthing, that space of labor. That might be a physical space, that might be a figurative space, but you want to belong and you don't want to know where you're headed, so where you're going to be belonging. So do some preparation for yourself and then purpose you want to definitely have you and everyone else on your team have a purpose. Now, if you're the pregnant person, your purpose is pretty clear it's to deliver a baby right from your body. That's your purpose. But there's so much more purpose to childbirth than just that, because you're having a pretty amazing life experience and an event in your life. And what? What's the purpose of this event in your life other than we get a baby out of it? But what do you want to gain through this? What do you want to learn in your mind, your heart, your body, in your relationships? And then the next one is safety. You want to be in a space that makes you feel safe. For many people that might be a hospital setting. For many other people that might not be in a hospital setting. So safety can include physical safety, medical safety, emotional safety, spiritual safety. But you want to be surrounded by people, place and policy that makes you feel safe and that will be different for everyone kids. So consider, in that need to be safe, what you're going to value or, excuse me, what you do value and what you will do to meet that need of safety.
Speaker 2:
Another one is trust. You need to trust those around you and trust ourselves. You need to trust the process. To some extent there's a lot of moving variables in childbirth often. But trusting the provider you've chosen, trusting the place that you are, the skills that you've surrounded yourself with, trusting the support that you've chosen, trusting the preparation that you've made. Trusting yourself that's a big one is trusting yourself and trusting the process. So a lot of times that requires some intention about who's going to be around you and also asking questions, because sometimes we're unaware of what we're trusting. Especially if this is a new experience which childbirth even if it's your fourth, fifth, sixth baby each birth is going to be a little bit different. So what do you need to do to be in a space of trusting those around you?
Speaker 2:
Connection is another one. You need some connection. Perhaps you feel incredibly connected to your partner through this process. Maybe you don't. Maybe you feel very connected to your provider. Maybe you have a doctor you absolutely love or a midwife that you have a great connection with. Maybe you have a long standing relationship with and have spent a lot of time. Perhaps it is the baby you feel connected with. You have a connection somewhere. Maybe it's your doula. You feel a strong connection, a healthy connection, a safe connection. It's your doula. You feel a strong connection, a healthy connection, a safe connection to your doula. But hopefully you feel connected to someone and something throughout your labor and birth process and leading up to it.
Speaker 2:
Another important human need is autonomy. We find this is huge in childbirth. Sometimes people feel like they were kind of just steamrolled in their very own labor experience. Maybe they didn't feel like they belonged or they didn't have a purpose. They didn't feel safe, they didn't feel trusted or connected and that takes away their autonomy. A lot of times we don't understand what's happening or why. We don't feel like we have a choice in it. We were given these options. Maybe we didn't appreciate or didn't agree with. So autonomy is huge. I hear that all the time. People want choices. They want to be able to make their own choices and be a part of the decision-making process. If you have a good birth team, you will be a part of the decision-making process. Now, every hospital, every provider will have a little bit different way they approach that. Now, every hospital, every provider will have a little bit different way they approach that and hopefully you are with a team that is going to help you feel like you have autonomy in your situation. I have seen situations that have very, very little autonomy and that can be very frustrating and you might not feel safe in that situation. I've seen other instances where the team surrounding the birthing person gives an incredible amount of autonomy Surprises me sometimes how much autonomy and how many choices they let them make. But you want to have autonomy in that you can act independently. You can use your own intuition and thought processes to make choices about you, your body and your situation.
Speaker 2:
The next human need we're talking about is respect. So you want to feel respected and be surrounded by people who will respect you, who will respect your choices, who will respect your desires and help support them. If you feel a lack of respect, that will very, very quickly erode almost all the other human emotions and human needs that we've talked about today. You won't feel like you belong, you may not feel safe if you're not feeling respected. There'll be a lack of trust when respect is not there. So you want to be respected, of course, by your partner, by your provider, by your doula, by your birth team, so that your voice is heard, so that you are treated in the very best possible way. But respect is a big one.
Speaker 2:
Another is self-expression, and I love this one in regards to labor and childbirth Having the freedom and the ability to express yourself. This might be in your desires, this might be in your coping skills, this might be in your immediate environment. Maybe you want to set it up in a way that expresses who you are and what's important to you. But this self-expression is having your voice heard, which of course leads to all of the other human needs of autonomy and respect and connection. But being able to express yourself, some people do this better in riding. Maybe they have a really great birth plan. That that's where they've expressed themselves. Others might do it through some advocacy, maybe their partner's helping advocate for them while they're busy during labor and very focused on the labor process. Maybe they have a doula who's helping them express themselves. But it should be always, of course, self-expression coming from the laboring person.
Speaker 2:
Another one is play or fun, and this one can come into labor. Humor can be a really great tool. Of course has to be driven by the laboring person we want. If it's not funny to her, it's not funny to anyone. But humor can be a really great tool and make have some fun with this. As you lead up to this, build in a little bit of room for play and for fun.
Speaker 2:
Kind of a funny story. As we prepared to have our first baby some 26 years ago, we took classes, we got ready, we I was nervous, you know, we had these tools. We didn't know how they would work or when they would work. But my husband and I had this terribly ridiculous sort of embarrassing inside joke and I decided that I was going to pull out that little inside joke during transition just as a little kind of lighten the mood, because I knew he was a little bit nervous. I was a little bit nervous and so during transition, when I was working pretty hard, I kind of looked at him and said our stupid little inside joke and it meant nothing to anyone, but it made him laugh and for the brief second I was able to get those words out. Between contractions it was fun to have fun. So build some fun in. I met with a client just last night and he is hilarious, so sarcastic, so funny and part of his coping mechanism, he said, was humor and he said it's ill-timed, it's terribly foul. Like that is part of my coping mechanism. Um, and she knows that you know so when, when those come up, he's like that's me.
Speaker 2:
But build in some fun and some play into your preparation for birth. Kind of lighten up a little bit, lighten the mood and don't take everything incredibly seriously all the time. Have some fun with it. And then the last one is rest and true respite. So this may be physical, it may be emotional rest, it may be mental rest, but building in some rest time, whether that's to rest yourself.
Speaker 2:
In leading up to preparation for birth, a lot's going on. There's a lot of demands, a lot of pressure, but take that time to rest and maybe that's some meditation, maybe that's some physical rest that you may need, as you're, you know, coming upon that laboring time. Make sure you take good care of yourself. Rest during labor that might be in early labor. You take some good rest. Sometimes that's hard. It's hard sometimes to rest in early labor because you're keyed up, emotionally, physically you're just keyed up. And as a doula watching people labor, sometimes they don't pace, keyed up and as a doula watching people labor, sometimes they don't pace themselves very well. Our clients are doing all the stuff early in labor. They're not taking the time to nourish themselves and nor to rest because they think, all right, this is awesome, let's get through this, let's go when we may have several hours of work or days of work ahead of us, so kind of pacing yourself.
Speaker 2:
Rest in early labor, rest in postpartum. Take that time to truly rest. I love the phrase. Five days in the bed, five days on the bed, five days near the bed, so that's 15 days. Our culture and our society is not great at doing postpartum resting, but take time to rest postpartum. We get a little bit of rest during labor because we get a break between contractions, which is mother nature's gift to laboring folks is. Let them have a little bit of break, regardless of how intense or strong the contractions are. We almost always get a break in between, where they come down and give us a little rest. Some people would argue there's a pressure that remains, and that may be the case, depending on how low the baby's head is. But rest.
Speaker 2:
So again, these basic human needs. I'm going to run through the 10 of them again and consider what you value of them, what you're going to need to do to meet these human needs and put a plan into action. So here's the 10 again Belonging purpose, safety, trust, connection, autonomy, respect, self-expression, play or fun, rest and respite. Hopefully you can get some, if not all, of these needs met as you anticipate and lead up to your labor and birth time, or if you're in your postpartum time as well. Those needs remain.
Speaker 2:
We've just taken a slice of those in relation to childbirth, but these are always our human needs, so make sure you're having those met. Thank you so much for being with us here today. I hope what we've talked about has been helpful in your life in some way and hopefully you can help meet the needs of another and helping them fill these same human needs. I hope you can do something today that brings you amazing joy and that truly lifts your heart and your soul. Thanks for being here again. This is Angie Rozier with the Ordinary Doula Podcast. We will see you next time.
Speaker 1:
Thank you for listening to the Ordinary Doula Podcast with Angie Rozier, hosted by Birth Learning. Episode credits will be in the show notes Tune in next time as we continue to explore the many aspects of giving birth.