3 - The Oracle of Delphi

In this episode, the Zodiac club is finally entering the secret part of Apollo's temple to find whatever treasure they might discover. Also, the Tiefling Union is going great... 

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Transcript

Dear Tombstone, today was just a splendid day. We were heading to the north, and there you can't go unprepared. And this led us to a very peculiar man.

His name was Mr. Mulligan, who really wasn't a fan of small people. Despite of that, we received the by far coolest item I have ever seen.

Astro got the most fashionable cloak in all of Asteria. Then Charles got a sword with his dad in it, and then we got a Rock of Teleportation, which probably will be handy at some point.

We then traveled towards the north, but we were stopped by a large canyon. This canyon could only be passed by riding some large scorpions, now that is cool.

Unfortunately all the scorpions were rented out, but you know what they say, when one door closes, another one opens. And oh do I have some exciting news for you, but not yet.

The scorpion guy, Mr. Frugal, pointed us in the direction of the people who had rented them, which seemed to be the Twyla Conclave, and obviously we had to find them so we could get to the north.

We found them at a ruin where we met Nicholas, a very talkative archaeologist, and then his very shady boss, Malachar, who seemed to be a real know-it-all, but guess what, he was

tricked to believe we came from the very known Inspection Company. It didn't stop there. Because he had all these tiefling workers he weren't treating very well, so I had to do something. I started a union!

So now I'm a union representative, and these tieflings will have a much better life. I do have to end it here, because my arm is really tired from carving all of this in stone.

Welcome to Lost in Astera, a D&D podcast with a serious story about silly people. My name is Vilas, your DM, and I'd like to introduce you to the players of the game. Hi!

My name is Mikkel, and I'm playing the character Rhesus Plus, the now-unionizing tiefling necromancer who just wants equal pay for his people. Hi!

My name is Morten, and I play the union secretary slash corpse-stealing monk named Silas Hiroto. Hey guys! My name is Simon, and I'm playing Charles of Stonehaven, a human fighter working as

an inspector in the day, trying his best to win his father's approval by night. Hi! I'm Anna. I play Arikas, a bratty, snarky half-elf rogue. I'm also playing the character of Silas Hiroto. I'm also playing the character of Silas Hiroto, who should probably be working on her attitude.

Hi! My name is Chris, and I'm the Zodiac Master. Hi! I'm Cheung. I play Galdric Galloply, an exiled human cleric, working as an associate assistant for the tiefling union.

Now that was everyone, and let's get right into the story.

Right, so we just started a union, and the guy you are talking to, he says, okay, he's like, okay, I'll go and I'll spread the word. And you see, quickly, he's sort of like, oh, I'm going to spread the word.

He just drops his working tools and he's like, just throws it away and goes over to speak to some people very enthusiastically. Hey, look at Silas. Sorry, I got carried away. It works. It works.

Malachar comes over and he's like, wow, what did you say? Are you part of the union? I don't think so. We have a client agreement. Client tiefling confidentiality.

I see. I see. But everything's okay, right? Like, we can work something out. Yes, definitely.

If you give them three meals a day, two breaks, hard hats, and a night's sleep, and a salary. Salary? Oh, God damn. How much do I need to pay them?

That is not in the union. Oh, I can decide that. Yes. That is a very big flaw in the union. It's not the best of unions. There's been better unions. There's been a lot of better unions. Maybe we should work on that.

Yes. We are known for being a very shit union. But we are unions. We are united. At this point, I guess you would see on the other side of the pond, you see the other

group walking around with Nicholas, and Nicholas quickly falls into his routine. Yeah, so you see that these carvings on the wall definitely is clear indications of Phoebe

and not Apollo's temple, which a lot of people believe, but it's actually Phoebe who has the control about the temple. So this is like a big confusion, and we can finally figure this out, and this is so great. I own the temple. I own the temple. Are you looking for a job, or are you looking for something else?

We are... He stops for a second. We are looking... We are here for the temple. But if it's only the temple, then I think we need to stop right now. To shut it down, unless like... Okay, okay.

Roll deception. I would say that you both roll, because I kind of count it as a help action. So both roll, and we'll see who get the highest. 17. I got a nat one. A nat one. Well, luckily it's advantage.

It will take the higher one. So it's like, oh, geez. So we're going to roll. Unless we are looking for something else. Hmm. Well, we sort of are, but we can't find it.

Well, what is it? Well, yeah. This is... Okay. So this is sort of the upper part of the temple, but there's sort of a lower ground level

that we're trying to gain access to, which is where the priesthood was supposed to gather and have meetings. And that's sort of where the valuable stuff was. Have you...

Are you well-read, as you say? Well, you have to go to the university to be part of this inspection group. So... So you're all academically trained... All of us. ...in the arts of science and logic.

Yes. Oh. You know what? Ask my colleague about stars. He is expert in stars. Oh. Arikas, what do you know about stars? Not that colleague. No. No. Okay. Why would you assume it's a woman?

Well, you said your colleague. Well, I have multiple colleagues. So sorry. I have... I immediately withdraw that statement. Mr. Nicholas, it's me, Astraland. Yes.

I'm the one who has a PhD in stars and zodiac signs. Oh. If you know a lot about stars, I do have this... Are you familiar... Well, you're all scholars. I'm sure you're familiar with Aeschylus' writing.

Yes? Yes. Yes. Yes. Of course we are. Of course. Yeah. Aeschylus, the great writer who is famous for his stories about the gods and their life and their dramas.

He has all this great knowledge about the titans, Phoebe and such. But he always fills all his books with riddles and I have no idea how to get through it.

Like, there are some riddles that I think I would tell me where the entrance to the temple is, but I just, I can't figure it out. So he hands you the book to look into. And the second you hold the book, you see that it's extremely old.

It's kind of flawed and a lot of pages are missing and ripped out. So clearly this book has been around for hundreds of years, maybe even more.

And you find a small passage in the book, but you have quite some difficulty reading it. It's in a language you're not too familiar with. Is there anyone who can read Celestial? Yes, I can. You do read Celestial?

Yes. Ah, okay. Okay. Okay. You can read it, but it's still difficult because it's sort of like English from a very old book. It would be like old English. It would be kind of difficult to read by today's standards of the language.

But you can sort of get the gist of it. And what you sort of see is that it says something like, when Phoebe and Themis align where the

bow meets the eye of Orion, there you will find the entrance to Phoebe's temple. So he says, does it make any sense to you? Yes. Orion is a star sign. Oh.

Star picture. Oh. I know a lot about stars. I see. I don't know about Themis. Hmm. Interesting. Do religion roll. So try to do a religion roll to see, because you do read it very well, but like how much do you know about this?

I think it's fair to say that you get advantage or any zodiac related rolls. Seven. What? Advantage. Advantage. Nine. God damn it.

But Astro, isn't there a bow in Phoebe? In one of the star pictures? Oh, yes, there is. You're right, Charles. So you're sort of wondering around that maybe there's a bow there.

You don't really know, you don't really know Themis, Phoebe you recognize, but you don't know what they mean by when Phoebe and Themis align. So it's sort of unclear.

But you do remember, yes, that there is a bow in the Orion constellation and it could have something to do with that. So how much of it do you tell Nicholas? Everything. Everything. Everything.

So like you said, Charles, like, oh, isn't there a bow there? And he goes, oh, okay. So maybe the stars need to align in a certain way to kind of show the entrance to the temple. Oh, this is very good.

You must stick around. Like, I need some fine, educated people like you to discuss this with because between us, Malachar, he's just so focused on getting it done.

So instead of stopping thinking, he just hired a lot of people in Scorpion to dig in random places. Like, he's completely ignorant to the arts of science and research. We actually have those in Havenspire as well. They're called project managers.

Thank you for listening so far.

If you enjoy the podcast, you can find us on Instagram under Lost in Asteria. There you can get a closer look at the cast and the character they play. But for now, I hope you enjoy it. And let's get back into the story.

So at this point, I would say that the two groups are made up. They're meeting at the other end of the pond after like a slow walk around the small watery area.

And you meet again on the other side and Nicolas is like, ah, hi, Malachar. And Malachar is nodding and saying, I'm hoping that you found in the pouch what you were looking for.

Somehow it's like I can find most of the permits you need, but some still missing, especially with like these. Um. What did you say, Charles, about the water?

I mean, that's really a big deal. Protected resource. Yeah. Protected resource. We take those very seriously here. Yeah. Maybe I forgot some of the papers. Takes out a new smaller pouch.

He's like, maybe you'll find it in here. You know what? This was probably what we were looking for. This temple here. If you find any treasure, what are you going to do with it?

That would be of the property of the Twilight Palace. So we're going to have to pay taxes on it, since they funded most of this expedition. Well, you have to pay taxes on it, right? Yeah, of course.

That's that's the whole thing about the conclave that they gather the taxes. So yes, of course, we have to pay taxes of any valuables that we find. And that's, of course, on the tax report on this year that that could be multiple treasures found.

There has to be on the report before we find it. Well, when you go for a dig, you sell how much treasure you expect to find. So. You can send out tax inspectors.

This podcast is so focused on union subjects before it's like, I don't know if anyone is still listening at all. It's about sending a message. This is no longer a D&D podcast.

Do your taxes, unionize. Do your paperwork. What a great and wonderful magical D&D podcast this is. Are all the chieflings in like one big group by now?

Like going, you, you, you, you, you, you. You, you, you, you, you, you. You, you, you, you, you, you. You, you, you, you, you, you. So I think at this point, uh, time period wise, there's only been like an half an hour roughly

since the last thing, but you have seen the work has become more and more less effective and the noise of digging and hitting on the rocks have sort of damped down over the last minutes.

So guys, how did it go with uh Mallica? We kind of forgot and we might have started a riot. And they wanted to give us the scorpions as well. But it's not their scorpions. we found a way

apparently they have a toxic work environment so so you actually did unionize them yes and we did damn well

okay but what we found out is that they're digging for a lot of treasure underneath the temple and there's some kind of riddle that we are trying to figure out with some star signs

so like ideally we would get the treasure, get the scorpios, get out before it turns bad great job guys and don't drink the wine

why is it mint wine? no but this guy I don't, he's like twilight conclave, just trust me don't drink the wine I'm definitely gonna drink from the phone okay

well I can't, I don't know what to say I'm gonna smell it before I drink it the water if you go down to investigate it is quite dense, it's quite salty I'm gonna drink from it and I'm gonna spit it out

I don't understand I thought it would be good it's the first time you see salt water never mind, this group is weird I mean, I've never seen salt I've never seen salt water

I don't know what to do do you know that there's something called the ocean? no that tells me all I need to know usually we had oceans of lava usually we had oceans of lava

also I have a question how do you see that it's salt water? you can smell it checkmate that's a good question you're so clever

I don't know, I wanna learn like the DM said it Astrolan is really good at zodiacs and Charles is great at identifying water at a distance that's your secret ability

from like 60 feet you can identify the quality and the quality of the water and the variety of water that you see yes, advantage and all water inspection yeah, oh that's all water related ability checks

you have advantages I'm gonna do that while you are discussing here you see that Astro is fully in like focus he's not listening to anything

he's concentrating on something else a problem right in front of him can you do a sort of perception check for me? since it's due to startling should it be advantage or? yeah

okay let's try one more time then seven and the first one was nine so nine again I think what you mostly would see

that there's sort of a line showing where the bow or maybe shield of Orion depending on how you look at it ah I think I know it now guys it's not a bow

it's a shield in the sky I always thought it was a shield that's why I couldn't remember it the first time just so you know it's not because it don't make sense makes sense yeah it makes sense all right

see if we can follow it yeah you can you can you can follow it for sure so if you follow the line you go and you go to like a part of the wall that seems somewhat unexplored

and as you look at the wall you see that there's a crack in it how big is the crack in the wall? it's quite large so you can sort of like reach your hand into it

maybe especially for you you would have an easier time putting like your whole arm into it okay but but for now it's sort of difficult to to like you could definitely not fit

like any person in there of any size okay I think we found it I think we found what we're looking for

what they're looking for yeah but they don't need to know do they let's see if we can find anything up so what do you do you see the crack in the wall you can sort of reach maybe in

but there's no obvious way of doing things stick my hand in it okay you take your large large arm and you're trying to stick it in so roll an investigation check

two it's it's so difficult to say like the like it feels like just a regular crack in the wall really like a lot of stone anywhere like some sharp edges but not too bad

it doesn't seem like you can find anything this rock seems rock solid I think you're maybe doing it too tall too like high up and I tried to do it the same with mine

so for you you can almost put half of your torso in nine nine hmm it's a bit better I think what you'll find the roll is not too hard it's not a difficult riddle

but I think with a nine should be sufficient for you to feel like there's a there's a small lever can I try and find it? can I try and pull it?

yeah you can pull it so as you pull the rock and the cracks moves apart ever so slowly

and as you look into the entrance you see a long hallway suddenly emerging water on the side as well and some torches lighting up

and at the end of the hallway you can barely see two yellow eyes looking your way from some creature some four-legged creature

has it seen us? yes but no words has been spoken so far I wave you wave? yes what do you mean you wave? like wave with my hand

at the woman or slash something okay so you hear a voice in your head that says are you followers of Apollo?

do we all hear this voice? yes is it only the waving guy? no it's all of you the entity assumed that the waving was on behalf of the group okay I think yes

oh okay then come in I look back and nod thumbs up nice going Charles good thank you

when you get closer and closer your voice suddenly appears in your mind again if you are from Apollo or if you are supporters of Apollo you of course

know the answer to the riddle that grants you access to this temple well of course we are in the temple so we have solved the riddle

I haven't told you the riddle yet oh is there a new riddle? do you not know who I am? yes you are a supporter of Apollo yeah of course

is it like a sphinx? is it the Oracle thing? yeah it's like a sphinx exactly move away Charles I got it okay Reese's roll deception

and read the die what did you roll? six

okay the voice goes hmm I'm unsure who I have in my temple we are newish followers of Apollo we haven't had time to read it all

some of us are very slow readers so read the handle! it's gonna take some time oh well I am the sphinx I am the Oracle of Delphi

Pythia so you wander in to this temple this most sacred most holiest of place for the God of Apollo

and you are new recruits as you say well it's very simple I have a riddle for you I have a test for you and if you succeed then I believe

that you are strong of heart and deserve to ask the Oracle one question can I ask something just before like not the question but just an extra question

it's just are you the grandparent of Apollo? are you like hyping your grandchild? no no no no no no I'm not the grandparent of Apollo I thought you were like the oh no that's Phoebe never mind

yeah it's exactly I just Pythia Phoebe kind of similar it's it's it says so in the next chapter I think oh she's one of the slow readers sorry sorry we're getting out of hand here

all right there's a riddle you need to solve it okay okay yes sir says the sphinx the high priestess okay okay here's the riddle

what has no voice but goes on four legs in the morning two in the afternoon and three in the evening

so out of character I know this well you could be wrong you don't know if you know it he knows well I have heard it before have you heard all of it before because I've heard about the no voice

no so I don't think it's what we think it is what happens if we get it wrong do we just have unlimited guesses? well no there needs to be a consequence of course but what happens if we get it wrong

well then I will cast you into the lowest part of the temple and you can fight your way out against what against monsters I'll create some monsters and I'll put them in the temple

and you have to fight them okay so right now there are no monsters because if there are monsters and we're gonna have to fight our way in it doesn't really matter if it's out or in like I feel like you don't get the concept of this temple people okay like I'm the oracle

like I assume you came here so I'm the oracle so I could like grant you wisdom and tell you one truth of the world like that's the price oh cool and if you fail you go to the parts of the temple you don't want to be at

right right right does anyone know this? yes oh I actually think I know it do you know it know it or do you just think

I think I think Astro knows it I can whisper it to one of you guys I feel like we could prob- like if we say this we're not giving you the answer we're just talking is that fine?

can we discuss it before we give you the answer? to make a creature huddle okay I admit it's been some time since people have came into the temple like honestly you're the first visitors in like easily 5,000 years

I maybe have forgot a bit my ways let's say we find a spoke person who can answer the question and then I'll only accept the answer when the person say this is the answer and then the answer

so who will tell me the answer after you discussed? Arika or Charles yeah no no I'm not I don't want to be cast somewhere so Charles I think we are all getting it yeah Charles

well yeah but maybe maybe he gets like extra hurt okay but we all get punished if we say something wrong it's a group effort you'll all get punished oh okay then I don't care

but okay so what do you think Astro? so I think I've heard it before actually and I think it's uh it's a human because it's from Greek mythology

and that's what I remember somehow so four legs because it's a baby yeah and that's why it doesn't have a voice has no voice on four legs and it has two in the like in the middle of the years

where you're young and adult and then the three in the evening is the end of the year we have a I think it's a wand maybe cane? but no voice but the part with no voice is

I think that's only supposed to be in the beginning but I don't know I think babies have loud voices yeah a mute human a mute baby a mute human

what if the answer is pretty correct but not what you were thinking when you gave us the riddle what if you were wrong like what if your answer is wrong

I asked the riddle my answer cannot be wrong but what if our answer is right but it's just not what you were thinking so I know I'm a bit rusty but I feel like you're not doing your job here I think you should write the answer down

so you don't change your mind afterwards that's such a good idea you should do that okay I'll okay wait I'm sorry can you write I'm sorry that was a list

I can definitely write or you can say what you want to write to me and I can write down but don't I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry no no do you have the body of a person I yes you can

but you said what's a sphinx isn't that like a part lion so as you can see I am part lion with a human woman's face I'm gonna write then so how are you gonna write

well I can I have laser vision I can engrave it I can of course the things have laser vision I'll engrave it in the wall behind me that's bowler and then we'll check it afterwards

okay deal I'm gonna use the laser vision now normally it goes better normally you have said you didn't have any visitors yeah yeah five thousand years ago

have anyone actually answered the riddle correctly yes oh is it the same one every time well if no one answered the riddle correctly then I wouldn't be known as the oracle of Delphi right

then nobody would have heard of me because no one got all the knowledge I have okay but then is it the same riddle every time I sometimes mix it up but most of the times it's the same

so maybe it's in a book somewhere like surely if someone's been here well I already closed the door so you can't go check something like we are in this now wait wait a second maybe Alfred knows

oh you don't know Alfred I'm gonna take my sword of Alfred out I'm gonna remember to straighten my back and pull up my pants before he can be proud of me

I'm gonna take out the sword of Alfred okay as you pull out the sword then again you feel this spiritual energy from it and you hear oh hello hello

hello Alfred oh so who are you well I'm Charles we met before Charles but I have a question for you oh what have no voice

but four legs in the morning two in the afternoon and three in the night or evening okay oh okay so Charles

maybe you roll a let's say a wisdom roll on behalf of Charles on behalf of Alfred oh yeah Alfred yeah you're Charles seven

um no ah well goodbye then can I go back to sleep now yes of course I'm gonna put my sword down did he have the answer no

oh okay so you have you come up with the answer I have laser engraved uh the answer on the wall behind me oh can we see it well obviously not you have to answer the riddle well no no we don't

can the character see it could could we infer anything based on like head movements or like how long it took or okay okay wait can anyone actually do something like illusion in the corner so

the sphinx looks away and then we can check it sure sure okay so what are you gonna do make a bonfire um

I can make flames flicker for one minute I can make harmless tremors well harmless I can make a little bit of smell wow guys that's useless

but you could make a smell did you say I think that's not bad like most people would react to that okay I will cast redraft

which I've got and make like the faint odor of skunk appear around the sphinx's head

and it's just a faint odor it's not like amazing or anything it's just a faint odor of skunk okay um

okay okay I will just roll on behalf of the sphinx uh let's say wisdom it has plus a million in there okay so I got a seven

so okay so the grand priestess he's like

oh god did you did you let in a skunk in here like I've oh my god like if if I'm gonna wait another 5 000 years for the next people like I don't want a skunk in here ah jesus

the sphinx gets up from its plateau when and rock walk over to the corner to see if we can find anything

and for the so how many of you have dark vision because it is it's not like completely dark in here there's some torches but it's sort of dimly lit astro you have yes I have as well

okay so astro and erika's you can on the back of the wall you can see uh it says I have as well you have as well okay so erika's uh

rhesus and astro you can see on the back of the wall that there's some writing uh it's not very well written because it's with laser eyes so it's I don't know how good that is for writing it says uh humans uh slash elf slash uh gnomes uh slash and then it says

Just dot, dot, dot. All right, so the sphinx comes back. It's like, oh, jeez, I couldn't find any skunk. This really sucks. Oh, wait, you didn't look on the wall, did you?

Well, I didn't. No, of course not. No, it's really dark in here. We cannot see. Do you not know how humans work? I've met plenty of humans. Like, I'm sort of half human, as you can see.

Yes, and can you see in the dark? I can see pretty well, but I've been here for 5,000 years, and I'm like a demigod. And you have laser vision. I have laser vision, so it helps a lot. I cannot see anything. I can't as well.

Do you have an answer to the riddle? Charles has to answer it. This is the answer. All right. A humanoid. Let me check the wall. Wait, you don't know the answer?

No, I know the answer, but I just wanted to double check. Well, that's sort of true. I kind of forgot that in the meantime, other races appeared in the world. It used to be just humans.

But that sort of changed, so I had to add a whole list of races. I think I'll change the riddle for another time. Well, you passed. Congratulations. Thank you. This is exciting, I think.

So, you came all this way. What do you want to know? You can have one question, and you can know anything, and I'll answer it, no strings attached. But only one question.

One question per person. Of course, right? No! No! No!

Okay. Yes, I will grant your wish. Yes, one question in total, so not per person. Thank you all for coming. It's been great having you around.

It's been nice stretching the legs, so now we'll be banished for Oracle forever. Goodbye! Sound effect. Do we not just get pushed out?

Yes, suddenly you feel like a strong pulling, and as the walls move away from each other again and once more, you can see out into the night sky, back onto the ruins, that you are pushed out of the ruins.

The door closes, and it doesn't seem like the crack that you saw before where you could reach in has disappeared.

So, you are now outside in the middle of the night. So, as you exit, the castle is open.

You can hear a small noise, like a stone that falls from one of the walls nearby.

So, as you can see on the map, there are numerous broken-down ruin walls standing barely in the area. And you hear some noise from behind one of the walls. We go check?

Okay, who goes? I go. I go. I go. So, as you walk around, the second you walk past the wall,

you feel the sharp edge of a sword that sticks into the side of you.

As you suddenly look down, bleeding, and see Malachar right in front of you in the night, everyone roll initiative.

What a cunt. Big move.

Thank you for listening to Lost in Asteria, the D&D podcast. What a serious story about the silly people. You know them. You love them.

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