Taking Requests - Are People More Entitled Noadays Post Covid? - Ep #25

Ever faced an aggressive guest demanding their song be played on the spot? Discover how to handle these high-pressure moments with grace in our latest episode of Clever DJ with Ilya and Nino. We'll share our experiences of navigating song requests in the post-COVID era, where crowd dynamics have shifted dramatically. From dodging physical threats to tactfully declining unsuitable suggestions, we provide you with practical insights and strategies to maintain control while keeping the crowd on their feet. Learn the art of never outright refusing a request unless it clashes with the event's theme and how to use diplomacy to handle even the most insistent patrons.

Join us as we recount memorable gigs where song requests have both saved and sabotaged the night. We'll explore how elevated DJ booths can be a game-changer, the different approaches needed for various music genres, and personal anecdotes about the impact of generous tips on our setlists. Whether you're spinning tracks at weddings, proms, or clubs, we offer phrases and techniques to help you manage requests professionally. Tune in for a deep dive into the joys and challenges of DJing in today's unpredictable world, and learn how to master the art of crowd dynamics while preserving your artistic integrity.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

If you bum them out, everyone's going to get off the dance floor.

Speaker 2: 0:03

I got a request for just this past, again last week, from one of my proms and he requested for an anime song, a specific anime song. I listened to it. I was like, and I asked him straight up is this going to clear the dance floor? And I don't know, I think some people will like it'm like, are you sure? Because if it clears the dance floor it's not gonna make me look good and and it's not, I'm not gonna like you too much, man, if I have to. And he's like, okay, walked away. He understood, I guess. I guess I kind of just like I was straightforward with him.

Speaker 1: 1:01

Welcome back to another episode of Clever DJ with Ilya and Nino.

Speaker 2: 1:06

This is episode number 25.

Speaker 1: 1:09

Yeah, number 25. What do we have today? I think we spoke about this before, but we're going to go in depth today. We promised we would do that.

Speaker 2: 1:19

We always go in depth eventually.

Speaker 1: 1:22

Yes, so some topics you can't you can't talk enough about it, yeah, for sure, especially this one, especially with the stuff we're going through, especially during some gigs. So today we have um taking requests and dealing with a crowd properly. Has people's sense of entitlement gotten worse over the years, especially during covid, the covid era since 2020? Yeah, that's when it started. That's when it all started, man, yeah, but really the results of that era started in 2021, 2022, once people lived like that for a couple years, right, yeah, especially yeah secluded yeah, let's, let's start.

Speaker 2: 2:03

You take it okay, so we're gonna start off with uh, so we're gonna start with ticking requests, right? Never say no to an actual request. Always try to veer it, veer it in another direction, but never actually say no, unless it's um, for a specific genre or a nightclub party, that they have a theme that's there going for right. You don't want to say no, it's just not, not, it's frowned upon, agree.

Speaker 1: 2:33

Yes, I don't think I ever tried to say no because, as somebody who you know just started off, it was really easy for me to do a gig when there are a lot of requests.

Speaker 2: 2:47

And you want to take the requests right. I want the requests because I know likely most people like it.

Speaker 1: 2:54

There were the one-offs. That was a weird request and even I knew that I shouldn't take it, but most of them are good. Most of the requests are good. In certain events. You want to take them If you're not 100% sure on what to play. It's going to make your life so much easier.

Speaker 2: 3:09

Exactly, and we have some phrases here that you can tell certain guests what you can say to them, just not saying no, right? There's some things that you can say to kind of veer away from not saying no.

Speaker 1: 3:23

Yeah, or buy yourself some time, right, exactly yeah we'll go over those uh towards the end, but uh, yeah, what else do we have here? So that's what we spoke about. We actually find people getting more aggressive and angry if the request isn't met, if the request isn't played not always, but a lot more than in the past I've experienced this.

Speaker 2: 3:50

Have you guys experienced this in your gigs? Just wondering, right, because, um, a lot, of, a lot of uh, clients will will come up and request songs and then they'll literally stand there like over your head, over over, watching you like are you gonna play it now, sort of thing. Or or else, right, sometimes they won't stand there, they'll stand behind you. So they think that usually not in the way, but you know they're behind you, right. But I'm like, yeah, some of them get very, very physical, right. I know this dj in the states. I got into an argument with a guest that was adamant I think she was trying to impress his, his, his, um, girlfriend or something and he started he's like you won't play my request and he started throwing fists. I'm like what, yeah, yeah it's, it's pretty bad it was pretty bad.

Speaker 1: 4:43

This has to be a one-off, though it it it's not normal right, it's not normal it also depends where and what setting it it.

Speaker 2: 4:51

It like, honestly, he was for sure he had to be drunk the wedding, though. Right, it was no, no, no, it was a bar. Yeah, it was a bar, I heard. I heard he came back the next day with a gun and it was a different dj too and he was like playing my request I don't know.

Speaker 1: 5:09

For those who are watching this podcast and you're not djs, here is a very good technique on how to get your song played right away.

Speaker 2: 5:16

Uh, just so you know, you likely will get your song played, but you are also going to go to prison and then you'll definitely go get taken, get taken away by the cops for sure and that's what happened in this instance, unless you're very quick play my song okay, gotta go. But for real, he got kicked out, he got beat. I think he got beaten up too, just by that and, as it was a bar in the states, like he was drunk, intoxicated, mentally challenged for sure, yeah, who would?

Speaker 1: 5:47

do that like in the right mind, the right mind, somebody who, whose brain works properly. It's crazy, it's just insane. So you either have some sort of like, some sort of issue in your brain, maybe you you have real serious anger management, uh, related problems. But yeah, that's not a normal thing to deal with as what I'm trying to say, but it could happen even here. There's a bar where I was just recently asked to DJ at. I was happy cause, you know, I don't have a lot of, like you know, back to back gigs. I still have to work for my clientele cause I'm just starting out. Um, whereas you have too many, too many man, yeah, you can give me a few if you want. The problem is yours are mostly weddings and I just don't do weddings yet. But, um, they, the the dj who was giving me that opportunity was saying how, hey, you know it's a great bar, but fights are up there it's not it's not rare either.

Speaker 1: 6:46

It could happen weekly, every other week um. Normally it won't be to do nothing to do with the djs it's mostly the actual ambience and the people that that come there yes, but the thing is somebody got hurt because he tried to intervene and he was either a DJ or on the crew, yeah, and so likely nothing will happen to the DJ unless they intervene, or somebody's asking for a request, or you're really bombing the night yeah because the regular dj day is pretty good, yeah, but the other thing that could really happen, even if it has nothing to do with you your gear can get knocked down because they're all over the place and there's like a brawl or whatever right, yeah, that's dangerous, yeah, very, very dangerous

Speaker 2: 7:33

I feel can happen anywhere. It can happen anywhere. I think I feel like these days, like like now, because of COVID and just the sense of the people can get everything at their fingertips. Right, they can download anything on the spot. They feel like that we're Spotify, right, so we can play anything. Why can't you just play my song?

Speaker 1: 7:54

Yeah, they don't think about the fact that it's not about how accessible and how easy it is to get it. Song yeah, they don't think about the fact that it's not about how accessible and how easy it is to get it. They don't understand the logic of playing a set or where you're playing, where you're playing it and and just keeping people on the dance floor.

Speaker 2: 8:07

Our job is to make people dance and they don't understand that when they request a song, it's. It's mostly a song that a request that's selfish, that they like personally and it doesn't like. It's not necessarily what everybody would like or would dance to, right. They don't notice it until it actually happens and you play it and I've. I've come across this many, many times that I've played a song, especially at the beginning of my career. I played a song and then it clears the dance floor and then what? You have to start all over again. You look at the person that requested and they're not even dancing because nobody's on the dance floor. They're probably at the bar drinking.

Speaker 1: 8:46

They're like, oh, shoot. And then they come hey, did you play my song? Yet I'm like, yes, I did. Yes, I did. That's when everyone joined you at the bar and like they'll come to you like this, like here, I found it for you. Okay, what do you want me to do? That's the worst. Right, let me take your phone, I'll unhook everything and I'll hook up your phone for you. Yeah, yeah, that's, you know, it's just um, even if you have, like on the fly, you have a way to hook their phone up like you don't want.

Speaker 2: 9:11

What are they?

Speaker 1: 9:11

expecting yeah they're expecting.

Speaker 2: 9:13

I found it for you.

Speaker 1: 9:14

Yeah, terrible, it's terrible once, I think, somebody um how did he? Yeah, he said, he said he will send it to me. I'm like like through email somehow whatsapp I think.

Speaker 1: 9:25

I think they want my phone number. Oh god right. So very rarely will I give my phone number to like random people, um, during a gig, uh, but yeah it's. Um, the fact that's so readily available does not mean we're gonna play it. Yeah, it's not about that. You know what, coming from me also, I used to be one of those people who would come up to a dj and ask to play something. I was always respectful.

Speaker 1: 9:50

I was always one of those people because I'm one of my song played right. I'm one of the people who make requests. I was always respectful. I always tried to figure out when is the best time to approach them. But I didn't really understand. Even me, being a musician, I wasn't sure what they're doing, right? Yeah, so when is the good time to approach? Right? But I tried.

Speaker 2: 10:11

I always love the requests that tailor to what you're playing at the moment. So if it kind of fits the vibe and if it was something that I was going to play anyway, I love, I welcome that because, okay, I was going to play it anyway. Thank you, I literally read your mind right there and you build rapport with them, yeah, and they're like oh you know, you know what we're thinking right. And they're like yes, yes, I love those. Yes, yes, I love those.

Speaker 1: 10:36

I love those, and that especially comes from fellow DJs, bartenders, people in the industry, people who party a lot and kind of have a good sense of music right.

Speaker 2: 10:46

But it's different when people just like no, play my song now.

Speaker 1: 10:50

Yeah, and then they start giving you looks and whisper something. Whisper something to their friends like, oh, that guy, that guy not going to play more.

Speaker 2: 10:58

And then sometimes they give you an excuse oh, we're leaving now, so, uh, we need you to play this song. Meanwhile they don't leave. I thought you were leaving, and then they come back like 10 minutes later. Uh, can you play my song now? I thought you left. You can play it in the car on the way home right, don't you have it on spotify?

Speaker 1: 11:17

yeah exactly right uh, do everyone that thinks we're a-holes. I love playing requests, I yeah, but sometimes it just doesn't make sense. It doesn't make sense for the the moment, a lot less for you. You have, like, your musical knowledge is far more advanced and you never really need help with anything. For me, some gigs I'm like shoot, what is up with this crowd? Nothing works. Like I'm getting 30% of the people on the dance floor. I want at least 60%.

Speaker 2: 11:49

Yeah.

Speaker 1: 11:50

And suddenly somebody comes, yo play the song.

Speaker 2: 11:54

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

Speaker 1: 11:56

Hell, mary, let's see I play the song you have to.

Speaker 2: 11:58

Everyone comes on the dance floor sometimes they know, they know what everybody likes.

Speaker 1: 12:02

It's like an insider tip, then I'm like you know what. I know how to proceed from here, exactly, exactly so sometimes we welcome requests that way, for sure.

Speaker 2: 12:12

Okay, that's enough for that. We can go on for that.

Speaker 1: 12:15

On that point right there but um, you actually mentioned the the dj booth being elevated. I wish everywhere every setup was like that, where the dj booth is like separated from the crowd and there's a spot where you can go and speak to them or, like your helper, could like, hang around there and take requests.

Speaker 2: 12:34

It's I tell you well, no, no, actually, if it was totally secluded and you can't even find a way. But then it's completely like anti-social.

Speaker 1: 12:44

I feel as a dj you should be approachable it depends it depends. So you should have the option. If you want to, yeah, but you don't have to go down, but you don't have to, but it depends on the night too.

Speaker 2: 12:54

If you're just playing hip-hop all night and everybody knows like that's, that's what you're gonna play, so you don't need nobody needs to request anything, especially if everybody's dancing yeah, when it comes to hip-hop, that's when you'll see me accepting as many requests as possible.

Speaker 1: 13:08

He's got a hip-hop head, so I, I, you know there's some hip-hop tracks out there. Like I listen to rap here and there too. Like you know, it's not your forte, I know no and it was maybe for a couple years I was.

Speaker 1: 13:16

Like you know, it's not your forte, I know no, and it was maybe for a couple of years. I was really, like you know, listening to it a lot, but for most of my life I listened more to like EDM, uh rock, mostly like soft rock, some metal like not hip hop, right, only like the really mainstream stuff. So if I go to an event and they want hip hop, first of all I'll be practicing like crazy.

Speaker 1: 13:41

Before that I'll be doing lots of research, but then on top, of that you'll be getting a bunch of text messages and requests for songs, but then if the requests come, I'm blessed because for that gig I need them you need them.

Speaker 2: 13:50

Yeah, yeah and um, yeah, I actually I did. I never really knew why DJs like especially veteran DJs didn't like requests, taking requests at all. But now, working for a few years, now doing it for a while, like 15 years, I understand exactly what they're saying Like, and sometimes, in certain situations, in certain venues, I like to be away from the crowd and just kind of playing what I like. Just as long as they're dancing, I'm doing my job right. So you can't tell me what to do. A lot of people, some guests, will come up to you. Can you please play something we can dance to? But then you look at the dance floor, look at the crowd, um, you can see that the dance floor is full, everybody's dancing. What do you mean? And then, and then they're saying, yeah, but she plays something good, it's because their group of people isn't dancing exactly.

Speaker 1: 14:48

So there is like, remember that one wedding? It was, yeah, it was a wedding, I forget where. I'm sure if I gave you a better description, you need to remember you always. I don't know how you remember, but, um, it was. It was something Latin and you're playing and more, more of the younger people were dancing. It was Italian. I know for sure it was Italian. You'll play the Latin music. They were dancing, the younger people, okay. And then some guy asked. And then some guy asked he was older, he was in his 70s, he was asking for a specific Italian song. Oh, yes, and it was very slow. And then suddenly, like within half an hour to an hour, that entire crowd of people just disappeared from the venue. It was already their bedtime, I know, but sometimes when you played it, they all got on, some of the younger people stayed, and then you see the shift.

Speaker 2: 15:37

You see the shift Every time. Yeah, and you need that, especially in bars and clubs. You need that shift, that wave to interchange from people getting drinks getting on the dance floor.

Speaker 1: 15:48

You're working with a venue, you're working with all the contractors, pretty much by making sure. Hey, you know, I know they haven't checked the photo booth yet or they need to drink. They need a break, so I can bring it up later.

Speaker 2: 16:00

Yeah, exactly, Exactly so same thing goes for weddings or bars, right? You want to make sure that they have a downtime to take a break, not just dancing the whole time really hard, Otherwise you're going to burn them out. Right? There's no way of them keeping that up unless they're like teenagers.

Speaker 1: 16:22

I think you remember that gig I told you about that really opened up my eyes, was it in december?

Speaker 1: 16:25

the gig you gave me because you really couldn't do it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, and I was like, are you sure, how am I gonna? Okay, fine, I'll do this, because I really wanted to and that was probably my absolutely best gig. I killed it at some point. I was getting killed by it like for like half an hour to an hour and then just something clicked. I'm like you know what? Just chill, you got this. You know all this music and they would not get off the dance for like two hours. It was just two hours, like straight. You know, the only break the gut is go to the table quickly get their drink and then come back to the dance floor. And they were dancing nicely, man, they were all over the place.

Speaker 2: 17:01

Those are the gigs. Those are the gigs we live for.

Speaker 1: 17:05

So much fun. Honestly, we keep saying this If money wasn't so important in?

Speaker 2: 17:17

this day and age, or ever really. If money wasn't this important, I would do this for free. If prices weren't so high, we would do things for free. We got to survive, but this is fun. It's fun. It doesn't feel like a job. Honestly, DJing is one of the best jobs in the world, I think.

Speaker 1: 17:27

By far Anything to do with music, in my opinion, right? Yes, I'm sure non-musicians would say what are? No, what are you talking about? I love being an engineer, or something.

Speaker 2: 17:37

DJs, you agree with us Best job in the world? Yeah, by far, by far, all right.

Speaker 1: 17:46

We're going to move on to the next one. You actually have a bunch of quotes. You would say which ones do you guys use? So we have the what did you write here? Which ones do you do you guys use? So we have the. Um, what did you write here? I will try to work it in, but I have a list that you need to get through too. I did that. Yep, I did this, this one. I was like, listen, I have it on my list. I'll play it later. I'm not going to lie. A couple of times I forgot, yeah, but that was a good one. That definitely helps, because then you kind of they give you the nod like, oh, okay, cool, and then walk away for at least two or three tracks before they come back and bug you again.

Speaker 2: 18:26

I'll see if I have it and if I do, I'll make sure to play it right. And if it's a good request and maybe I was going to play it anyway then I'll definitely play it. But if it was a really bad request and I think it was gonna clear the dance floor, I'll just forget about. Oh yeah, that's right if he comes back to me and ask where's my quest? Oh, sorry man, I don't have it. The wi-fi is really spotty here too. So and that's the end of it, right, if you want to, uh, if you want to request another song, feel free, I might have it or you would offer them something similar.

Speaker 1: 18:55

Yes, how about this? About this? Would you like this song instead? Yeah, right, that's why, when they come up for a request, if I, if I see that a song is not a good request, I tell them listen, I can't play this right now. Give me two other requests, I'll try to play one of them. Yeah, that's also a really good one, like I'm. And what's the other good thing you wrote here? Sorry, I can't download anything. The Wi-Fi sucks. You already said that. That's really funny. It's actually true. Some places it's really yeah, it's terrible Hotspot nothing worked Because there's no.

Speaker 1: 19:29

This we're like In the middle of nowhere, three, four hours up north, and the infrastructure there is just not up to par, yeah, north, and the infrastructure there is just not up to par, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2: 19:41

So there's no way, so we're telling the truth.

Speaker 1: 19:43

That way, right, do you? Yeah, go ahead. No, no, no, go ahead. I'm sorry, sir you finished your sentence did you have anything important to say? Uh, I forgot what I said. Okay, so it wasn't important. So I'll say something. Yes, um, did you ever get paid for a request? I know you did. I'm just trying to make conversation.

Speaker 2: 19:58

Yes, yes, and I have certain tiers for when I get certain tips. If it's like $50 and above, I'll play it right now. Whenever I'm playing right now, I'm going to stop it and then play Sell out.

Speaker 1: 20:16

Sell out. Sell out. No, I'm joking, it depends play.

Speaker 2: 20:20

You know, sometimes if you're, if you're playing at a bar and you're playing, you're getting paid like uh, 250 dollars and somebody tips you like 100, 100, 150 dollars. It's like almost more than half of what you're getting paid.

Speaker 1: 20:30

Man, I'm gonna play their request yeah, so actually one of the only times I got paid working with Nino was when I got a request and he liked it and he just like dropped me a 20. I was like I'm keeping this, that is mine, I earned it, it's yours, man.

Speaker 2: 20:48

You earned it, right. If it's a 20 or something, I'm going to play. Ok, probably play it in the next 10 minutes or so. Ok, it's a good request. And if it's a good request, right. Okay, it's a good request. And if it's a good request, right.

Speaker 1: 21:01

If it's a totally bad request, there's no way I'd actually give the money back to them sorry, buddy, sorry, not even for 100, no, but um, yeah, I, I think I got a 20 at least once, maybe twice, when I was, um, just when you were mentoring me when we were on, you know, on the on the wedding tour thing that we're doing Wedding tour Like back to back, friday, saturday, sunday, friday, saturday, sunday, every week. Right, I did like dozens of gigs with you, dj, life and um, and then also, I believe, yeah, yeah, I got paid, I forget how much, probably a 20. I would, I would have remembered if it was 50 or 100 yeah but I got.

Speaker 1: 21:39

I got a 20 also when I was uh djing myself and they asked for a request but I either didn't have the song or didn't want to play it and I offered something else and then, based on that, I also started playing other music that they really enjoyed. I got. I got their vibe and it also was good for the night yeah, so sometimes it's a win-win.

Speaker 2: 21:56

So I got a vibe and it also was good for the night.

Speaker 1: 21:57

Yeah, so sometimes it's a win-win. So I got a 20 and I got another tip on top of that, yeah.

Speaker 2: 22:00

It's great that sometimes they request something that you're going to play anyway and they tip you. Oh man, Life is good, Life is good. And just recently I got tipped $500 at my bar gig. It was more than I got paid for my bar gig, so that really made my day. I was playing all the music that they loved and it was just that the guy just came up to me after and like yo, fire, fire set and dropped money. I was like wow, wow, wow, Are you going to stop? No, he's still going. I'm like thank you so much. I wanted to like kiss him. I actually hugged him. Thank you so much. I wanted to like kiss him.

Speaker 1: 22:37

I actually hugged him Right. So, yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, Um. Last one on the list drunk requests. It says parentheses. Example at my wedding this past weekend I don't think I heard that.

Speaker 2: 22:50

Oh man, yeah, the, I think it was. Yeah, that's just this past weekend. Um, I had a, a request that that the one guy from the wedding party he was like play, play some edm. And the dance was packed play some edm. I know you can do it. I'm like, yeah, I, I can do it. Yeah, I can definitely do it. And um, but it gave me an insider like a tip of like what they really really wanted. I was playing stuff that they liked, but once I started playing like the edm stuff, it was did it help? Wow, yeah, they went crazy.

Speaker 2: 23:30

I was like, wow, okay, okay, this is what I asked about that I didn't know about that crowd at all and sometimes it's good to to take requests from people from the bridal party, from the bride and groom. Sometimes it's not. It works against you because they're going to say, oh, this is from the bride or the groom, but meanwhile it's not, it's just from them. But in this instance it really worked out. It was a fire dance floor Best wedding so far for this year.

Speaker 1: 23:57

how long was that set?

Speaker 2: 23:58

ever since they asked for it and then you that edm set lasted probably an hour oh, so that was like long midway yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it was midway I saw it.

Speaker 1: 24:08

I love when requests go so well, it was.

Speaker 2: 24:10

Yeah, it was a fire, fire. Uh request, I was like yes, thank you.

Speaker 1: 24:14

Thank you so much, bro, so one of the toughest places to get requests, in my opinion, is proms. That's where I don't like requests, but the kids I mean.

Speaker 2: 24:27

If you bum them out, man, get off the dance floor I got a request for a like just just this past again last week, um from my one of my proms and he requested like for an anime song, a specific anime song. I listened to it. I was like um, and I asked him straight up is this gonna clear the dance floor? And that I don't know. I I think some people will like it. I'm like are you sure? Because if it clears the dance floor, it's not gonna make me look good and and it's not, I'm not gonna like you too much, man, if I have to. And he's like, okay, walked away. He understood, I guess. I guess I kind of just like I was straightforward with him, like, yeah, our job is tough, right, and a lot of requests are selfish, 90 percent of requests are all selfish. So, yeah, they don't think about that all right.

Speaker 1: 25:25

Well, there we go. I think I think we covered. We covered a nice list all of it. That was a very in-depth episode about requests and how to deal with them. Yes, sir, well, thank you very much for joining another episode of the clever dj. You guys, we're gonna see you, sir. Well, thank you very much for joining another episode of the Clever DJ.

Speaker 2: 25:40

Thank you, guys. We're going to see you in the next one. Thank you for joining us, yes.