When Does Grace Become an Excuse? with Meredith Noble

Balancing business and motherhood is no easy feat, but it’s a journey filled with profound insights and surprising rewards. Today I'm joined by the inspirational Meredith Noble, co-founder of Learn Grant Writing and mom. Her story is one of grit, grace, and growth as she manages a thriving seven-figure online membership while navigating early motherhood. From dealing with her husband’s frequent work absences to juggling nanny care and maintaining her own well-being, she provides a raw and relatable account of her daily challenges and triumphs.

Meredith is an Alaskan entrepreneur, community leader, and outdoor adventurer. Her bestselling book, How to Write a Grant: Become a Grant Writing Unicorn, has helped secure over $42 million in grants, with her students securing over $627 million. Meredith enjoys outdoor activities with her son Wylder and is building tiny houses and a lodge in remote Alaska for creative professionals seeking deep work and nature.

Topics covered in this episode:

• Meredith Noble’s professional and personal background.
• Strategies for balancing professional and personal life.
• Differentiating between giving oneself grace and using it as an excuse.
• Importance of having a support system and her husband's role in child-rearing.
• Allowing others to grow by stepping back and not micromanaging.
• Importance of self-care and addressing basic needs.

CONNECT WITH MEREDITH:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/22meredith
https://www.instagram.com/meredith.noble

Learn Grant Writing:
http://www.learngrantwriting.org
https://www.instagram.com/learngrantwriting
https://www.youtube.com/@LearnGrantWriting
https://www.linkedin.com/company/senecaworks

RESOURCES FROM ALYSON:

The Kid-Proof Business Checklist
https://alysoncaffrey.com/checklist

Maternity Leave Planning Guide
https://www.mastermaternityleave.com/guide

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:06

Are you juggling the challenges of running a business while raising your little ones? Do you crave more ease in balancing your professional ambitions with the demands of parenthood? Well, sit tight, you're in the right place. I'm your host, alison Caffrey, and I understand the growing pains that come with building a business while nurturing a growing household. Think of this as a soft spot to land when you feel like your ambitions are starting to become just a little overwhelming. Welcome to Growing Pains.

Speaker 1: 0:37

Hey, and welcome back to the Growing Pains podcast. I'm your host, alison Kaffrey, and today I'm going to sit down with Meredith Noble. This conversation was so, so incredibly juicy, and she is in the thick of postpartum time. Her son, wilder, is six months old, and our conversation was really centered around seasons of life and how to really embrace opportunities that come while also giving yourself some grace, and when does grace become an excuse? I love this topic and I really am excited about diving in with her and for you guys to hear all the things that Meredith is working through and even just how powerfully she shares about some of the struggles that she's having. I think every mom in either the early stages postpartum or, if you're white knuckling it, in early stages of motherhood. This is like an amazing conversation.

Speaker 1: 1:32

So Meredith is an entrepreneur, community leader and outdoor adventurers in Alaska. She is the co-founder of Learn Grant Writing, a seven-figure online membership for those building a career in grant writing. Her book, how to Write a Grant, become a Grant Writing Unicorn, is a bestseller for nonprofit fundraising and grants. Meredith has secured over $42 million in grant funding and her students have secured well over $627 million, like over half a billion dollars y'all A number that grows daily. Always an outdoor adventure, meredith now brings her son, wilder, along for skiing, biking, hiking adventures. Her latest creative undertaking is building a series of tiny houses and a lodge for Alaska creative professionals looking for more deep work and creative time.

Speaker 1: 2:14

Like you guys, last frontier in Alaska, meredith is really blazing a cool trail. She talks about how her and her husband have a plane that they're trying to find a hangar for. So super unique challenges, but also really, really incredible and also universal for all of us moms who are going through some of this stuff. So you guys are about to get an excellent treat. Meredith is an absolute, amazing, incredible soul and I can't wait to see you guys inside. Meredith, thank you so much for joining me on Growing Pains. How are you doing Fantastic. Thank you for having me. Yes, I am so excited. Before we press record we were kind of talking about, honestly, I feel like we should have recorded the pre-recording on all the things that we just discussed, because I'm excited to dig into this. But for the folks listening, let's level set a little bit. Tell us a little bit about your business and the family that you have at home.

Speaker 2: 3:03

Absolutely Okay. So my business which you could call my first baby is Learn Grant Writing, where we help those that want to have that are burnt out professionals a lot of times stay at home. Moms learn how to write grants and make money doing it. So I'm very good at helping people build flexible careers that are also fulfilling as a grant writer, typically in the freelance realm. So that's the business we have. So we have one offer it's called the Global Grant Writing Collective community coaching and, I guess, coursework and then outside of that, as I am a new mom, I'm a new mom on the block, so I have a six month old and I am definitely in the thick of navigating what it means to be an ambitious businesswoman with a newborn at home.

Speaker 1: 3:47

Man, six months is, I feel, like just about when you start to kind of like get out of the clearing of, or, yeah, get into the clearing of, motherhood and things are like super chaotic. So what is life actually like at home right now? Like, is baby sleeping? Are you feeling like you guys have kind of hit a stride or a rhythm?

Speaker 2: 4:05

No, baby, is baby sleeping? Are you feeling like you guys have kind of hit a stride or a rhythm? No, baby's not sleeping. He'll go to bed, but it's definitely up twice or two or three times at night. And I am going to start taking care of babies the online course soon but honestly, I just asked my husband to do it Cause I'm like I already am just at capacity, Like you watch this and help us figure out what we need to do.

Speaker 2: 4:22

My home situation is very interesting because my husband leaves for work two weeks at a time, so I'm a single mom in many ways half of the month.

Speaker 2: 4:31

And also nanny care has been really touch and go, and then a lot of travel and we have two houses, which sounds fancy, but really it's because we met and haven't figured out how to live in one house yet, because here in Alaska everyone has a bush plane or like a little tiny plane that you can go fly to remote places, but that means you can't just sell two houses and buy one because the plane needs to go somewhere. So we've been, you know, working on how do you actually bring your lives together. So I think what's when I've been reflecting on, like, where I've had dissonance and stress, it's been, you know. I think about Maslow's hierarchy of needs and I'm, like you know, in many ways, like my core security needs, you know. Obviously they're met Like I have, you know, I have the resources I need to buy anything, and yet when you don't have kind of your stable housing situation or stable support system in place, I've realized just how destabilizing that can be to then enter, try to expect myself to still operate at full capacity in my workday.

Speaker 1: 5:27

Honestly, meredith, this is I personally have experienced this. So when we were pregnant with our second son, we moved and it was the same deal, right Like we could afford care and we were renovating our home. It was such a blessing to be able to do that right, to be able to, like, afford, to create the space that we really wanted. But I did suffer a lot of stress at that time and by my own doing because I was like expecting myself to continue to perform at the level that I was, while we literally had no floors down and I was eight months pregnant, right. So talk to me a little bit about this.

Speaker 1: 5:56

Like, you know, your cycles of like, what you go through in terms of motherhood and business ownership, because this is a season, right. I mean, of course you know that and of course you guys are working toward some kind of you know, outcome or progress toward an outcome, right On combining your lives and things. I think this is such a great metaphor for, like, pre-baby and post-baby, like combining your life, like motherhood and Meredith before motherhood. So what kind of things are you and your husband talking about and what are you going through to to kind of reconcile with the fact that this is a season, but it needs to at some point come to an end and I need to figure out like what is my capacity at this time?

Speaker 2: 6:35

Yeah, okay, well, this is where the story becomes pretty fun. Okay, so we know that we want, we need, a hanger for this airplane, and if we have a hanger for it that's closer to Anchorage, alaska, then we could sell both of our houses and move to the next step. So finding a hanger in a state that has literally planes everywhere is a really big ordeal. So we found one through word of mouth and I mean just went full send on the offer, like trying to do everything we could to get it, and then it sounded like we weren't going to, weren't going to get it, he's going to give it to somebody else. And then we found a second hanger and got under contract with it and then, literally last weekend, we found out about a third one that's being built locally. That would be just like the Taj Mahal of all hangers.

Speaker 2: 7:19

It'd be like the dreamiest hanger and it's like a million dollars when it'll be built. And so, all of a sudden, I was like wow, we manifested three hangars in a place that has literally no hangars for sale. This is insane. And what do you know? The first one, which is the opportunity we were most excited about, because it would include a like, kind of like a family plane, a Cessna 182. It's a four seater, it is included in the sale, and he just came back to us and he said hey, your story is the most compelling. You guys are the ones that need it. I think it should go to you. And we literally met for lunch yesterday, said what do you need to make this happen? Shook on it and it's happening. So what was so that's what's been kind of happening in the back end is I feel like I'm using my grant writing skills to write these persuasive proposals of like why don't you choose?

Speaker 2: 8:07

us Right and included photos of us with Wilder as a baby in the plane and just trying to show like, hey, this, this is really like the thing that if we unlock this, the rest of our life can, can, flow. And then what ended up? And then, interestingly, my husband had this scare of like would he lose his job, and it ended up being such a blessing. So last week he didn't lose his job, but it was like this moment that was like, oh, is this going to happen? And it was such a wonderful thought exercise because we got to think, well, if you did, what would we do? And what came from that was realizing, like you know, we could just go on the adventure of a lifetime for a couple of years.

Speaker 2: 8:49

I've got a business opportunity in Kelowna, british Columbia. What if we just move there for nine months? Let's just go work on it, let's just go there. And so that's literally on the table right now. So it's just, I think, like it's all it. You know, it's very interesting to know intellectually that you don't want to. When you require certainty, you actually limit way more incredible possibilities from happening in your life, because the most incredible things are beyond what we can even imagine, and so it's been very interesting to have one foot in, you know, holding these dreams loosely and lightly, while realistically being like I hope this happens, please, please, please, like this would unlock our whole lives, and so it's. It's been a definitely a dance for both of us to like be loose, be open to what is possible, while also craving that stability.

Speaker 1: 9:33

Man. As a person, I'm an ops gal. You do that. I love the stability piece for me as, like a big driver in terms of me being even open to possibility. Right, I need to have those boxes checked. So how are you guys navigating this dance? Because having all the options on the table sometimes to me like it just feels so overwhelming, and especially at a time where you're sleep deprived you might be hungry or like holding your pee for like a lot of the day, right Like that was me early postpartum. I remember I was seeing a postpartum therapist and she was like Allie. I'm pretty sure that most of your issues that you're having with, like your postpartum anxiety are because you haven't eaten or you haven't gone to the bathroom in like a significant amount of time.

Speaker 1: 10:16

So just like take care of your physiological self. So how are you navigating and what are those stable non-negotiables for you right now?

Speaker 2: 10:24

I mean I'm sorting out what the stable non-negotiables are. Let's be real. I mean I was thinking about that. I'm like can I even just get to one gym class a week where it's my time on the weekend? Like can I? You know, I've got a lot of friends that are volunteering to watch him for a couple hours so I could do that. So those are for instability, because I'm also pulling forward the coolest stage of my life ever, like we're basically I just so, basically this is a good story.

Speaker 2: 10:53

I was five months, four, four or five months pregnant. I finally started feeling better, like after the nausea lasted much longer than three months, and I had a bad attitude because that was when I realized like this is what's unfair about, like why women aren't running the world because we can't. It's where heads are in the toilet, throwing up Right. So to fix my attitude, I believe sleeping on the dirt fix anything that's sour. So I went out to this place called McCarthy, alaska. It's in the largest national park in the U S just these huge glaciers and peaks and it's this old copper mine town. It's literally the end of the road. Like it's a 60 mile dirt road to get there and I pitch a tent and I planned on staying for a week at the toe of this glacier, and I ended up staying for close to a month, and so I would.

Speaker 2: 11:39

Yeah, so I would work in the morning at the little potato burrito shop work, you know, hotspot my phone to do work, go to the swimming hole, and then in the afternoon I'd go look for property, and so there's no Zillow out there, right, it's all word of mouth. And I found these beautiful 10 acres, totally fell in love with and I yeah, we basically just bought it a couple months ago. So we're going to move out there this summer with an RV and a baby and like start clearing land and making that dream I have of like tiny houses for creative professionals that want to have kids that are basically like truly free range. There's no cars in the town, like you park at the bridge and then everyone walks their bikes, and so you know it's like, yeah, it's.

Speaker 2: 12:22

Is it stabilizing to live in an rv? And like try to be navigating, nanny care and all these different locations, and no, not at all, but it's, it's the adventure of a lifetime too, and so, um, I'm, I'm enjoying it, while also definitely navigating, like I can't get as much done as I feel like I'd like to. But I'm working through just like resetting my expectation, and everyone keeps telling me, like, have more grace for yourself. And I'm like what does that even mean? What does that even mean? So I've spent a lot of time thinking about, like, what does it mean to have grace for yourself?

Speaker 1: 12:58

Honestly, meredith, this resonates, I always say to like one of my coaches, and she's excellent, she's, uh, has a family, um, four, four little kids and runs a company. And, um, I always say to her I'm like you know, I want to have grace, but when does grace become a really convenient excuse? And it's. It's interesting because I think a lot of what has made me successful in a lot of ways is like lending that critical eye to the grace periods, right, lending that critical eye to me resting on my laurels or saying that I'm just the systems gal, I can't be the CEO or the face or whatever, right, like those, those types of limiting beliefs. And I'm curious, as you're, as you're working, as you're working through this, and you're starting to really consider like what are, what are these opportunities that I can pursue? When does grace start to like kind of weigh, weigh on that, and then, when did the opportunity start to appear?

Speaker 1: 13:52

I think I almost kind of see them as two different sides of the coin, which isn't, which isn't true, of course, right, but sometimes I think, especially when I was early on in motherhood, I was like I have to give myself grace, which means I can like say no, right, I can be like, nope, this isn't for me. But then there are so many great things that you want to do, right? You love work, you want to be creative, you want to be like flexing that creative muscle and using your brain. So what has that been like for you? Where have you been feeling like you for sure want to give yourself that grace or give yourself that space, and where do you feel like you're like, nope, motherhood isn't going to limit, limit me, right, I'm going to go in and do the things I know I need to do.

Speaker 2: 14:32

I mean, it's a wonderful question, I think. So. I'm just recently navigating. What do I think the word grace means? And I in my life? And when I think of the word grace and I were to come up with synonyms, I would think smooth, flowing, right? I think of a dancer, right? You think of someone that's on a stage. It's beautiful colors, like just effortless, and I'm like, is my life gliding across the stage, effortless and a beautiful outfit? No, no, it's not.

Speaker 2: 14:59

But and then there are these moments that I think, particularly I'm hard on my, on my husband, because he's gone for two weeks at a time and he comes back and and he, you know, wants me to to be, of course, a co-parent, and I just want to check out so and so. Basically, what I realized was like I needed to release the expectation that there's this somehow like perfect 50 50 split at all times and that he's capable of what I am capable of, and I am a high producing machine and can generate more than the average person, so I can't put him on into expecting him to be a copy of me. But what I realized, like there was this thing that he really wanted me to go to the airman's show. This is like the Christmas for anyone that flies planes, truly like it is where it's all at All. The friends are there, all the planes, and I knew it was so important for him and every once in a while you just got to do something because you know it's really important for that person.

Speaker 2: 15:47

But in that moment I said you know what I know this is important.

Speaker 2: 15:50

I will prioritize it in future years, but I need you to take the baby and I need to have a nap and a night to myself and so weeks solo and I know a lot of moms that have never had a night to themselves for years.

Speaker 2: 16:08

So I think you know part of it is like he wouldn't give it to me if I wasn't kind of demanding it because it's hard work, right Like he. They have to kind of reacquaint themselves and get to know each other under, you know, going to sleep when it's not mom's routine but it's, I think I'm not. I'm working on how to offer grace and myself in those moments when I feel like I'm being too hard on my husband and not proud of who I am. In those moments like just feeling like a terror and also, you know, not wanting to use like hormones as an excuse or any of that I never want to and never do, but also being like I haven't slept a straight night through in six months Like come on, yeah, totally. Of course I need to offer grace to myself if I expect others to offer grace to me as well.

Speaker 1: 16:54

And just to be able to communicate that in a way that doesn't feel confrontational or accusatory. Right, it just is. Right. You just haven't slept a full night in six months. And that does a lot of stuff to our endocrine system. Right, our hormone is right, you just haven't slept a full night in six months. And that does a lot of stuff to our endocrine system. Right, our hormone production that does so. I think it's super interesting.

Speaker 1: 17:11

When the kids were little, I remember there was a time for both of our sons where Steve, my husband, would do everything the same, like everything possible similar to exactly how I did it. But the boys would still cry, they would still want mom, they smell you, they smell your milk, like all the things that they say. Right, there's just nothing like mom's touch. And I think that him being so persistent through those times and it was defeating for him, like he was like what am I doing here? Like the dad sometimes, I think, can start to feel like a little useless or a little outcast.

Speaker 1: 17:50

And it's interesting because I think as you work through this, meredith and I know this to be true for me was that as I continued to still invite him in, sometimes like a little forcefully like, no, you need to take the baby now. But like when I continued to invite him in it still, even though it didn't feel 50-50, and he probably didn't feel like it was 50-50, we were still pursuing that 50-50, if that makes sense, like knowing it was a season. But 50-50 doesn't need to mean 50-50. Baby split Right, right. 50-50 could mean other ways of getting your cup filled, right 50-50.

Speaker 2: 18:22

I mean, I think it's just a terrible thing to even track it, Cause at the end of the day, then it's just tallying I did this, you did that and I. It's one of those things that I'm like Ooh, I want to get away from that altogether because it just doesn't serve us as a couple. Um, but I agree that, like, the most powerful thing that happened is like because he's taken him now two nights. Every time he comes home from a shift, takes him for two nights in a row, their bond deepens because they don't have me as the crutch, that's so special.

Speaker 2: 18:48

It's super cool and and his confidence goes way up from on the tail end of one or two nights by himself without me around. Even though it was rough in the moments when he was like I can't do this without you, get to the other side of it and he's got tons of confidence that he can. So I do think sometimes we probably rob people of that moment to gain their confidence because it's easier to just hand to mom, totally.

Speaker 1: 19:11

Yeah, and man, that's such a powerful thing to say. I hope that anyone listening like replays that moment again, because I find that and I struggle with this even to this day like delegating things to others, even to our husbands and our partners, and this even to this day, like delegating things to others, even to our husbands and our partners, and our friends and our moms, people who are taking care of our kiddos, are in our business. Even we hamstring people from being able to gain their full confidence because we make ourselves too available and we don't kind of fully pull back from that. So have you found that to be true in managing your company too? Have you kind of exercised that similar practice? Because I imagine your plate, proverbially, has shrunk since becoming a mom.

Speaker 2: 19:51

Yeah, that's a good question. I mean, if you want to bring it back to the beginning of maternity leave prep, I mean, I think that's one of the biggest questions new business owners face is like, how do you actually get out of your business? Because that is what set the stage for how I'm working now. So it was, it was something we started this time last year, so six months in advance how to prepare and we had a lot of false starts.

Speaker 2: 20:11

No, it's not like we just nailed it, like we were like, oh, we'll bring in this person and we're going to, let's do some dating projects, we'll get to know them so that they can they can play my role while I'm out. And it took. It took four or five months to realize like, ooh, this person's actually not the right person, this is not the path we wanna go down. And then we only had basically eight weeks to just completely under a ton of work on my plate that I was trying to finish last fall before he came, trying to squeeze in an entirely new approach to maternity leave, and one of the things we did that was really helpful was I just wrote out in a Google doc what are the things that I can stop, what are everything I do. So everyone did a two week time audit, which is helpful for a company to do anyway, because you just want to know how everyone's using their time.

Speaker 2: 20:54

So that ended up being like a huge unlock because I realized some of my my marketing gal and customer service gal were actually doing a lot of admin. That was taking a ton of time, so no wonder they weren't getting into the strategic projects that I valued. So we ended up getting them each assistance that have. Basically. I mean especially the customer success girl. I mean she basically replaced her whole job and now I'm like great, wonderful Cause I was at the fraction of the cost. Now let's level you. So it ended up being like a great exercise. And then I went through that of being like what can I stop doing, what needs to be delegated, what can I train someone else in and what maybe is something I just need to drop in and do, like tax. And that was such a simple document and it got it all in just one place and that served us really well.

Speaker 2: 21:38

And I think the mistake I made coming back was that I did. I didn't know how to work on the right things. So I would find myself being like wait, wait, wait. Why am I doing this kind of admin thing or project management thing, like I know someone else can do that. So I was struggling with that and then frustrated with myself and just that I didn't feel like I was using my limited time working wisely.

Speaker 2: 22:00

And I can say that now that is not a problem. Like I reflected on my last week and I'm like I did $500 hour, $5,000 per hour activities every hour that I touched work and that's pretty cool. I mean I feel like I'm still not getting like lots of the things done I want to get done, but if, like, if that's all I am getting done, it's actually like the highest leverage activities. So it took a little bit of an evolution of like, studying yourself, looking at how you're spending your time, but that did that discipline of getting to like what is truly the and I wouldn't even say this discipline is out of just simply necessity to like just don't have the time and energy, so I have to do the things that. That is all I have the time and energy for.

Speaker 1: 22:49

Yeah, you know, I honestly appreciate you and see you for doing that and being so critical of your tasks, because I think as moms transition back at least in my experience, supporting, you know, women through this experience is they go back to what's comfortable because so much of their life is destabilized and their identity is a little bit shifted.

Speaker 1: 23:02

And you know I went through it. I absolutely did this and it felt almost like a comfort to go back to the same things that I was doing inside of the business, instead of using it as a lever I could pull to uplevel myself and the company and you know, you know lead and raise up people below me and I love that. You lent that critical eye in those early days. And I think, for moms who are listening now, who either are, you know, in the thick of you know, the postpartum time, or even in, like early stage, toddler hood, and they're like I just went back to the old job I had, with the same to-do list, the same task list, but now I have less time. No wonder we all feel like we're feeling right.

Speaker 2: 23:38

Well, that's a that's a good distinction. I came back wanting a very different job. So we, I came back knowing I want a different gig. I have something else in mind. I want another business I want to work on and start and a huge opportunity Like, so I can't come back still being responsible for marketing etc. Right, so I had that very distinctly set out as an objective. Now was it? Did I reach that goal?

Speaker 2: 24:03

When I came back, no, Felt like a lot of yes, the same gig, but at least knowing where you want to go allows you to like move those blocks into place.

Speaker 2: 24:11

Cause I think the biggest thing is like we make commitments that we still have to pay for along along the way, and so it's just not something that you can like flip overnight. But if you're really intentional about it and I think, yeah, I mean that's one of the biggest things Like I spent a ton of time when I got back working on proposals to go to a conference and I mean I put a ton of time and effort into that when, like, I really should have still just been on maternity leave, Okay, Honestly. And then I look, I look, we get, you know, half the proposals selected, none of which are the ones I really wanted to do and I really looked at my energy for it and I'm like I don't want to fly with a baby from Anchorage to Denver. I don't want to have to try to operate out of a hotel room with the child. I don't want to even go.

Speaker 2: 24:53

So, why am I doing this? Why did I put the? I just I'm killing it, I'm putting the kibosh on that. And it's been this forcing function of like what are the simplest things I need to do to grow the business and let everything else fall to the wayside, like even doing. Honestly, this podcast interview is like an exception, because I realized that I was like I need to be in a season of no meetings, right? So I think that those boundaries have been helpful, just being like what needs to be true to move the lever.

Speaker 2: 25:20

And for me it was like okay, marketing is the bottleneck. I need four times the leads. What's the one method I want to focus on to do that? Who can I work with to do it? So I just stripped it to like the simplest answer, which I think is really the trick of 10. X is easier than two. X is like what really? What do you? What are the few things you need to do while? And I say that on one hand, and then, on the other hand, I'm like, yeah, but look at all these other ideas I have and things I'm pursuing. So I'm a little bit of a hypocrite, but it's an art form.

Speaker 1: 25:53

Honestly, Meredith, I love the way that you've positioned that, because I believe that maternity leave and becoming a mom can be this incredible forcing function to grow your business, in the sense that it does force you to strip away a lot of the things that aren't serving you and a lot of things you don't want to be doing, the things that don't let you up, that don't bring you energy, and it seems like, although I'm sure there are days where you're like man, this is rough, it's definitely a beautiful work in progress.

Speaker 1: 26:13

I think that it's so excellent that you've really taken a lot of what it the benefits of becoming a mom and a business owner, Like I think it's such a beautiful incubator and I want to go ahead and like push back a little bit on the ideas part of it, because I actually think that as you're growing a business that feels simple, it feels streamlined, you aren't like in the day-to-day weeds of the things. That's when the ideas come. It's like when you're in the shower and like as soon as that warm water hits you and your cortisol levels lower, then all of a sudden you have like this inflow of like information and ideas into your brain. I do feel like since you've gotten up out of the weeds of you know your business and you're not so entrenched in marketing anymore. I think that's when the ideas start to come. So talk to me about those opportunities. What are you excited about and how are you kind of navigating, like when to say yes and when to say no to things that you really want to pursue?

Speaker 2: 27:12

Absolutely Well, the biggest thing. I learned this last April. So we celebrate this thing called National Unicorn Day. It is our big holiday and in fact side note we were just recognized by the Alaska State Legislature for all that we've done with Learn Grant Writing and they honored us on National Unicorn Day, which I just love the idea of a bunch of like stodgy representatives, like using the word unicorn multiple times on the floor, so anyway, so we hosted National Unicorn Day and we hosted a live event in Bend, Oregon, for grant consultants to level up their business. Both things are super expansive and fun for us to do and we violated core values which are scaling. Simply, we made things extraordinarily complicated. And the other thing I learned was, like every new venture we go into, we have a set of assumptions. Now, whether we are consciously writing down and looking at those assumptions or not is what can get us into trouble and so all too often, as an eternal optimist, can get us into trouble.

Speaker 2: 28:04

And so all too often, as an eternal optimist, I was looking at I just see what can go right, I don't see what can go wrong. I don't look at the world that way. And so we pulled it all off, we executed it, but I was trashed and maybe even a little bit still am on the other side of that. So what I'm navigating, especially as a visionary and anyone that is listening to this has has a lot of ideas is all too often we make the promise to ourselves that it's it wouldn't actually be all that much work, wouldn't take that much time. But that's not true. Like are those? Are those assumptions true? What really is going to be the energy tax of the idea and who is the like operation operationally? Who is going to be the energy tax of the idea and who is the like operation operationally? Who is going to help execute Right?

Speaker 2: 28:53

And so what has been the go, no go for all the ideas that I've been floating across my plate has been do I have someone within my existing team and network so no new cost to my bottom line to execute and operationalize the idea? And if the answer is no, I've had to set it down. And if the answer is yes, then it's like okay, I'm going to pursue this. So that's how I am keeping myself in check, then not just trying to like add complexity by adding a body to help execute it, because I'm saying what can I do with the existing resources I have?

Speaker 1: 29:28

execute it, because I'm saying what can I do with the existing resources I have? I want to double click on something you said execute and operationalize. A lot of people think that's the same thing and I'm an ops gal so I know it's not, but when you pull something off, then you want to weave it into how you operate. How are you approaching those two things a little bit differently, Because I think that women listening could definitely benefit from hearing how you're approaching this.

Speaker 2: 29:48

Absolutely. This has been a big debate that my co-founder and I've been having the last week, where she noted that it feels like we're it's never good enough, we're chronically having to optimize, it's chronically about making it better and and I pushed back and felt like it's not, that it's not good enough. We've actually built the rocket and the rocket is awesome. We don't, we're not in a building phase anymore, like the collective is built. If we add more to it we actually could affect its success because it's making it too complex, sure. So for me, the execution was building it. The execution was building our little rocket.

Speaker 2: 30:26

The operational side of that is running the rocket, like keeping in the fuel in it, keeping our customers happy, dealing with retention issues, like and those are smaller iterations and they're not.

Speaker 2: 30:38

They're not as juicy of wins Cause you don't feel like I did it. I just built this whole module or something Right. It's like I made a two question tweak to the exit survey. Is it going to make a difference? Like it's just not as fulfilling of a question to be working on, which is why, you know, visionaries like myself can be troublemakers in our own business, because it actually is a business that's working well and is profitable, but we have to go and add things to it, which is one of the reasons I've had I've been so I'm so fulfilled chasing this McCarthy dream of building tiny houses is it just gives me a creative outlet that allows me to not sabotage my existing business. So, to answer your question, execution for me is is the building of it, it's the and I'd love your interpretation it's the people side of making it happen. And operations is is optimization, it's running it and making sure it can run in perpetuity.

Speaker 1: 31:28

And like maintaining right, because I think a lot of us are like be wonderful to have the shiny new Ferrari, but then we need to maintain with Ferrari prices and with Ferrari parts and at Ferrari frequency and with Ferrari cost of fuel. And so it's interesting because I think a lot of folks forget about that maintenance piece. And I love the simplicity of what we spoke about before because my husband he's a prior special operations army maintainer and we always talk about the simplest machines are the easiest to maintain, so creating that simplicity is just a key to making everything flow.

Speaker 2: 32:03

I see it all the time. We just had a guest speaker earlier this week. She built website templates. That was our like overly complex gift to everyone. We literally gave everyone on website, which is incredibly complex.

Speaker 2: 32:14

I didn't realize, very nice, but she was talking, she was coaching on the uh, you know, giving them a coaching lesson after that and I realized like this is actually way too complicated. This is like the female approach, where we have to have everything so pretty and the website needs to be just night fantastic. And the reality is like I think what I'm realizing is like I have chronically made things too complex. And there's this balance because I believe in craftsmanship, like we're also in an era that I feel like maybe sometimes MVPs are too rough. Like how do you balance like a seven star experience, taking pride, having craft in the work that you do, while also not letting the fancy, busy work and perfectionism bring you down? And we built a product, we built a marketing engine, we built a lot of things that are too complicated and now I'm looking at like what actually do we strip out? How do we make this way simpler and specifically for women? I think we need to hear that, because all too often we're making things way too complex.

Speaker 1: 33:08

Yeah, I couldn't agree more, and I have a question about that. I also value craftsmanship. I'm also a details gal. I often find that it's almost a requirement for me to go through all the details and exhaust all the efforts in order to even see, sometimes the simple solution, and this is true for me. I often can see simple solutions for my clients, but it's always funny Like you can't see the label from inside the bottle. So do you believe in that? Do you believe that it's almost a requirement to go through the messy you know minutia of details and the perfectionism and struggle with that in order to be like okay, yeah, there's a way, easier way, yeah.

Speaker 2: 33:46

I mean, yeah, we don't have a CRM in our business and we're a million dollar plus company Like we. That's one of those basic tools that we are lacking, and every time we've tried to go do it, the amount of details is just actually so complicated and it's so scary to like implode the business to fix that problem that we just back off of it. So, and because it just feels like there's a lot of resistance, a lot of like this isn't going smoothly, the CRM calls with vendors are canceled or whatever, and so what I'm finding more and more is that I'm paying attention to the in the business where are things flowing with ease and where is there a lot of resistance that we are just trying to muscle our way through and we're, as a team, all getting very attuned to that difference and it's allowing everything to come with a lot more ease. So it's like we're not, it's okay. We've just been like, yeah, I guess I'm going to let another quarter go by where we don't solve the CRM problem because, hey, we want to have a four day work week this summer, we want to just do some maintenance and operation projects and nothing that new, and we're okay with that.

Speaker 2: 34:48

So I suppose to answer your question. I think it's honestly, I just forgot my train of thought and I think that's what happens when you have to wake up three times at night. So this is like perfect for this podcast, it sure is. I was up at 11.30, 2.30 and 6 am, okay.

Speaker 1: 35:10

You know what? It's funny I joked before we jumped on the call. Like I always say, this is the soft place to land, like we've had moms in all certain situations, all situations and all stages of business, and you know what A lot of what you've shared I think is so valuable for I mean, first of all, me as my little mini therapy session here on growing pains, but also to for any mom who's listening, who is like things feel way too cumbersome and overwhelming. I loved that really simple thought that you just posed about looking at the business and seeing where things are running really well and just like focusing on doubling down on that stuff, cause I think, especially as women and I suffer from this is I actually tend to focus on the problems and like fixing the problems instead of showing gratitude and sharing about what's going well 100%.

Speaker 2: 35:56

Yeah, we I we are literally having that exact same conversation with my co founder and I like because we are in a chronic state of improvement, optimization. Does that send the message downstream to our team that we're not celebrating an ingratitude for all of the amazing things that we're doing? So we did just add a channel in Slack that's all about wins and gratitude. We have one of them in our customers circle group, like people are posting wins and gratitude. We've trained them on the importance of celebration. We are. You know, we've got all of these values and yet if you look at our actions, I think we have room for celebrating even more, because the more that we calibrate to gratitude, the more of the good stuff that'll flow our way. So I do, yeah, I think it's.

Speaker 2: 36:43

It's tricky because that sometimes I think we allowed ourselves once last fall or at some point last year we felt like we slowed everyone down for the to really focus on soul care. That was that's a core value as well. Soul care, like taking care of yourself before you can help anyone else, right? Something like all moms are struggling with pretty much. Yeah, and and. So we did that, but we actually felt like we moved. We actually lost momentum as a team and as a company. So it was like, wait a minute, how do we have soul care, how do we, like, make sure everyone's taking abundant care of themselves while not losing the momentum and not fall yet not falling trap into false urgency that is just built into the, you know, frankly, like the, the white American dream, right.

Speaker 2: 37:25

So we're definitely, you know, I think, and I think how we're approaching that is, let's focus on seasons. Is it a, is it a dig season or is it a rest season? And up here in Alaska, we're very intimately connected with that, right, like you have the darkness of winter, you have the 24 hour daylight in the summer, you've got. So you, just you really do adjust. Your body changes, your mind changes, your energy changes depending on the season, the food you eat changes, the habits change. So why don't we do that in our business, having cycles, and so we just did a huge cycle in spring. That's always like a really big one and it's like, okay, let's, let's allow everyone to rest and recover and enjoy their lives, and then we'll have fall to dig into our next batch of projects.

Speaker 1: 38:08

Um, meredith, I love that and I think us getting back in. I was saying this the other day to a gal I'm coaching with and she was asking me about you know why she has so much more energy and she feels really in flow and I'm like it's springtime, the sun is literally out longer, and so your body is like we are higher energy and we need less sleep, and this is super fun, and, of course, the reason why that those seasons don't last that long is because you physiologically cannot continue to operate at that level for that length of time. We need the dormant periods, and so it's just so great that you've tapped into that.

Speaker 1: 38:43

I believe that motherhood gave me the gift of feeling more connected with my surroundings Like we always joke that. Like I developed my mother's intuition, but before that I was super bullish and hardheaded and I was like any amount of effort that I give will blast through this wall and it'll be great, but I needed to develop another way of being, to get to the next level of all the things, right. Like you have to understand that Well, it doesn't work.

Speaker 2: 39:07

I mean you're exactly right. What you were doing was this belief that we all hold that to make more money we need to work harder, because it's somehow a linear correlation between those two activities, which it's not. That level will only get you to maybe 250K in revenue, 500k, maybe a million if you're really hardworking, but on the whole like not really Most people, I'm seeing in a service-based business like they might even just get to 100k before that work harder, make more money system fails. So when it fails, what's the alternative? And the alternative is, I mean, really what's been so fascinating is, yes, the less I work like, the truly it feels like the more opportunities I'm creating.

Speaker 2: 39:44

Now I only get to have the privilege of doing that because I've gotten to a certain revenue level, but it's like I'm realizing now how much more is possible with, like, the power of my mindset and my beliefs and, um, you know the choices I make of who I surround myself with and the content I allow to be consumed in my mind. And I'll give you an example of this. Last week cause this is super funny kind of mom drama so I posted a job description looking for a nanny and a house manager, someone that could be all in one right Cause I'm already paying kind of separately with like a high school girl helping me. And that job post got screen screenshots were taken of it and posted in this private group called the great Alaska uh T's bill. So it's just literally this like rumory group with 50,000 people in it and of course the comments are blowing up on it Like it was so brutal stuff.

Speaker 2: 40:33

So it was actually well, it was actually quite balanced. But of course I didn't see the balance. I only saw the negative thing. This, this um looks like the mom doesn't want a mom. You should be reported to the IRS and department of labor for how you're paying. You know, just like all this stuff is, just like that's the only things I I go. But that's not what was said. There was tons of people that were like what an amazing gig. If I was younger I would totally do this Like this is a great.

Speaker 2: 40:59

I didn't see that and instead I saw the negative. And then, all of a sudden, like I'm on my downward dumpster fire spiral last week and I was bringing everybody with me. It's like anyone that came into contact with me, like it's like I was picking a fight and and I.

Speaker 2: 41:14

That was when, like the hanger, deals fell through and you know, it just kind of felt like wow, like I am dangerous right now with like how bad my mindset is, and. But it was also because I allowed myself to even like get into that garbage and look at it and entertain it and keep seeing what new comments are being added Instead of being like sweet thanks for the extra marketing.

Speaker 1: 41:36

Yeah, totally. If any of y'all want to get in contact with me, know somebody who's a good fit.

Speaker 2: 41:41

Exactly, exactly. So, you know, I think that's like one of the biggest things that we can do for ourselves and like to hit the reset. Like I was trying to stop and like slow down. But I was almost in like a where you just like can't stop looking at your phone and you, you know, you just kind of get sometimes into these spirals where you're like, how do I stop myself, especially as I was sleep deprived and feeling frustrated and like just all the negative thoughts were really not helpful, like I had to hit a real hard reset.

Speaker 2: 42:08

And then, of course, I get to the other side of that and I'm like okay, I'm me again, but those things because I've also learned how to process those feelings better instead of just like burying them inside or dwelling on them, um, so, yeah, I mean, I guess all of that to say like those moments happen. They can be really, really brutal, but they don't have to be defining for us. Like I, at some point, I was like enough is enough, stop consuming this. I removed myself from all those groups and carried on with my life and then, like you know, two days later, get the, the hangar and airplane deal comes back onto our plate and I'm like, okay, we're good to go.

Speaker 1: 42:42

Isn't it incredible how how you do one thing ends up being how you do everything during certain times?

Speaker 1: 42:47

And I had a very similar um experience not about, like you know, a posting or anything public, but like I was really almost like hovering outside of my body at times postpartum with like the level of anger and anxiety that was happening in my body and I would get like really outwardly angry or frustrated with certain things that were happening in like my home life, and it was like I saw myself from like five feet above me and I was like in my brain I was like this isn't rational, this isn't the way you want to be acting, this isn't the way that you actually even feel.

Speaker 1: 43:22

You're just reacting in the moment. And so it was really an interesting time that in those early months where I was just like nothing will change unless I change it Right, the environment won't change, like I have no, I have no control over others, I have no control even over my baby Right, like I was like he's going to cry the baby, like it's just going to happen. And so it started being this like detangling of me from what's going on around me, if that makes any sense at all.

Speaker 2: 43:54

A hundred percent. I mean, I think we build. I did the same thing. I built a delicate scaffolding around myself before I had the boy and I thought, okay, this is. I thought I didn't have much anxiety because I'd built this wonderful system around myself to protect myself from being stressed, right. But the reality is, if anybody kicked that scaffolding, the whole thing came down. And that was what happened to about two years ago I, literally the guy I was dating it was a quick story, you know I had been all in on him and when that relationship fell apart, like my heart was deeply broken and the tiny house that we were living in had a gas explosion and I was inside it when it happened it was just like one thing after another.

Speaker 2: 44:33

It was just like I was so sick I lost my voice. I couldn't run coaching calls. That was when we actually started hiring coaches, cause I literally couldn't show up. The fatigue was an exhaustion was so bad I was convinced I had cancer, at least an autoimmune disease that was undiagnosed. Right, like it was so dense and all I wanted to do is control everything around me. Be like, well, if you just did that, I wouldn't feel this way. Right.

Speaker 2: 44:58

And finally, what I realized, like it came to the end of that journey, I realized like my scaffolding served me. It got me to this place. I'm grateful for that. And it's not going to help me live into the next version of myself and the life that I want. It's like I can't have the relationships I want, I can't have the business I want, I can't have the relationship with myself that I want If I keep trying to hold that scaffolding together. Like I need to get at the root of the foundational cracks and patch those.

Speaker 2: 45:25

And so, and I made it my mission to patch up as much of those cracks as I could before my son came, because I did a home birth and I knew that I was. I knew I was like I'm going to become a different woman on the other side of this, but the only way I'm even going to be able to do it is like if any of this junk is still lingering around in my head and in my body, I'm going to be clenched tight, and so I did a ton of work to clear that up, and it was like that was the deadline. You know his looming birth to be like I gotta. I gotta really prioritize this, not put it off any longer. It became way more important than any sort of growth strategy for my business, because I realized the business had grown as much as it possibly could. It grew as much as I was as a person.

Speaker 2: 46:09

And so now, if I want that sucker to grow, I have to grow, and that is what I feel like the leading up to his birth did, like the prep, and then matrescence has been like the beautiful upside of a lot of that work. Like not to say I don't have moments where I fall back a couple steps and after you know, people and circumstances show where we're not free. So I have my moments, but on the whole, like it is a completely different reality than it was even a year ago.

Speaker 1: 46:39

Oh, I'm inspired. Thank you so much, honestly. Thank you so much for sharing this because I'll be I'll be honest my first son. Six months in I was a floundering crazy mess and I'm sure you have days oh, yes, you bet I need to reflect back to you that you are an absolute beacon of excitement and light, because I know a lot of moms who are, you know, really probably listening to this thinking like, wow, okay, I need to do some of this work now that my kids older, right Like, or I've gone through the dark seasons, like in early motherhood, and you know it's really important, I agree, to do this work early and to do it well.

Speaker 2: 47:16

So thank you. I'll just add something really quick, because I I never knew what that like do the work meant, right? Or I go to counselors and I was like none of this is working for me, like why, you know, I tried somatic therapy, didn't work. I was just like why is nothing working?

Speaker 2: 47:32

And the one person that got through my hard little head was Victoria Song, her book Bending Reality I think it's called. The subtitle is making the improbable probable or something like that and that finally gave me the tools that book and then subsequent coaching with her. In fact, I literally had a coaching call with her this morning that helped me understand how to rewire the stoic beliefs that were bestowed upon me as a you know, raised as a rancher. We all were raised in this of like kind of holding those beliefs inside, Like I didn't know how to process feelings, I didn't know how to actually process anything. That's why it was coming out. It comes out as anger, it comes out in these like really ill forms, and so I have to say that, like if anyone's looking for a tool, I recommend starting with that book, especially if you're in business, cause that's all about like it's all intricately connected and like I single-handedly attribute the work and influence that she's had on me to like my own luck.

Speaker 1: 48:31

I'm going to make sure that that's included in the show notes as well as any way to connect with you, Meredith. How can people do that? How can folks continue to follow along, get in touch if they're into grant writing or want to make that kind of a portion of their, you know, freelancing repertoire or business repertoire when can folks find you?

Speaker 2: 48:47

Absolutely Okay. So our website's very easy Learngrantwritingorg. But probably, if you want to have a conversation honestly, just find me on Instagram. It's at meredithnoble, and I'm having a blast sharing all the things Adventures with Wilder in Alaska. This McCarthy dream will be there. Grant writing stuff is shared there as well, so I think that's probably the best place. Just drop me a DM. I love having conversations.

Speaker 1: 49:08

I got to say, um, your Instagram is awesome. I also love following along with your guys's family journeys and just like all of the fun stuff up there in Alaska. It really is like the final frontier, so I feel like you guys are there. Um, meredith, thank you, thank you for having me.

Speaker 2: 49:24

This is, this is such an important conversation to have. I've just especially now as I'm entering this new world and seeing all the things I don't even know I've especially now as I'm entering this new world and seeing all the things I don't even know, I've I feel like I've never understood more the value of it takes a village than I do now, and so these are, these are the types of mediums that make that possible, like there are connections that will come from this conversation we've had that you have made possible. So thank you, thank you.

Speaker 1: 49:47

Honestly, I know that the mompreneur community is like one of the most supportive of all time, because we all know that we need each other. We need each other to lift each other up, to just listen, to be there. So I appreciate you contributing and sharing your story. I'm going to link all the fun ways that people can get in touch with you and seriously, from the bottom of my heart, I really appreciate all the things that you've shared.

Speaker 1: 50:07

My pleasure, thank you you've shared my pleasure, thank you. Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode of Growing Pains. I know that you have so many things vying for your attention right now, so I am so grateful that you just spent the last hour or so with me. So I hear all the time from mompreneurs Allie, allie. What systems do I need to have in place in order to thrive in business and in parenthood? If you go over to allisoncaffreycom slash checklist, you can grab my kid proof business checklist and it will get you started in the right direction around making sure that you build a business that doesn't steal all of the time away from your family. If you loved today's episode, I would be so, so, so honored if you would leave a review on the podcast. It helps us reach even more incredible mompreneurs just like you and give them the resources they need to be wildly successful in business and wildly present at home with their families. Thanks so much again and I'll see you next time.