Finding Peace: Jesus in Faith, Hope, Forgiveness, and Grief

Welcome to The Jesus Studio Podcast, where we share powerful testimonies and transformative stories of faith. Join us as we delve into the lives of individuals who have encountered God's love, forgiveness, and hope in profound ways.

In this episode, we sit down with Bob and Christine, a couple radiating joy and laughter despite the challenges they've faced. Hear their heartfelt journey through the ups and downs of life, including their profound experience of losing their son in a tragic motorbike accident and the incredible grace that allowed them to forgive and find peace. Discover how their faith in Jesus has carried them through the darkest times and continues to be a source of strength and hope.

Whether you're facing difficult circumstances or seeking inspiration in your spiritual journey, Bob and Christine's story is sure to touch your heart and remind you of God's unwavering presence and love. Tune in, be encouraged, and let your faith be strengthened through these moving testimonies.

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Keywords: Faith stories, Christian testimony, Forgiveness, Coping with loss, God's love, Spiritual journey, Inspirational stories, Hope in Jesus

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Transcript

Bob & Christine

Transcript
Speaker 1
You're listening to the Jesus Studio podcast.
Speaker 2
Our son, he had a motorbike. I was always into motorbikes. It's one of those things that it was his passion to and his last. Was a Yamaha R1 which is 1000 CC motorbike sports motorbike however. It was to, unfortunately take his life, but the bottom line is God is with us. He changes everything he he gives hope. When there is no hope. We know that because David committed his life to the Lord when he was young, that it's God's job to keep him and and God has kept him. And and we know where he is now. And so there's hope for the future as there is for all you know, Jesus.
Speaker 3
I saw a man walking in after a while. The guy in his probably mid 50s and I knew straight away. Out of all these people it was so random. I knew that he was found driver. I want you to know from the bottom of my heart and I want you to know in the depths of your being. Through and through. That not me, not Bob, my husband, not any of our family in any way. Hold you responsible for what's happened. And we don't want you to hold any guilt whatsoever. And if it's at all possible, we want you to go on and live the rest of your life and enjoy it. As if nothing's happened, and then I just gave him the biggest hug. Policemen were just sat there with that had been at the at Rd accident scene. We just sat there with tears running down their eyes.
Speaker 4
Hello and welcome to another episode of the Jesus Studio podcast. I'm so grateful to have my friends Christine and Bob here, and I can't wait for you to hear their story, and they're just a couple that I love, they. Radiate joy and laughter. They always crack me up to the point where I am just laughing days after and I just. I just love their their energy and everything that's good. God has done in their lives so. OK.
Speaker 3
Thank you. Thank you, Jen, and Lovely to be.
Speaker 4
Here and so, so grateful. And and just introduce yourselves for everyone, and then we'll hear your story.
Speaker 2
OK, I'm Bob.
Speaker 3
And I'm Christine Bob's wife, and and we've been married for, I think, 48 years. Wow, that's really cool. I think it is. It's so long, I'm not sure.
Speaker 2
It's a good time, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. And I'm. Bob and I'm 69, which is where. Where did that go? So hey, yeah. So sort of my background is a bit like I grew up in a fairly regular family, really mum and dad at home. I had a brother have a brother.
Speaker 4
Young.
Speaker 2
Bit of an unusual situation in terms of my mum carried a lot of issues and that obviously showed itself out in the family life during the war, which she was a child then she was evacuated to the USA. Her parents thought that her and her brother. Should be taken away to safety rather than live near London, which was being threatened to be. Bond and my grandfather worked for the Hoover Company and the Hoover Company chartered a ship, and so my mum and her brother were put on this ship and sent to America. They didn't know where they were going. They were put with host families but separately, and she was, what, 12 at the time? And so. For five or six years, she was over in the States and. The people that hosted her would basically doing it for money rather than for care, and so she was bullied in the family. She had a hard time at school out there. And of course she went through the changes that you do as a woman, a girl at that age, up until 16. When she came back and that affected her long term, so my experience of my mum's at home was very much she was very controlling, very fearful. And it affected life in the family. My dad was just a stalwart. He just. He understood, loved my mum and carried it through regardless. But I guess me being a bit of a rebel, I struggled with some of those things, particularly the control issue. And so family. Life wasn't ideal for me, even though the family environment was safe and secure. So that was sort of my growing up years, really.
Speaker 3
Umm yeah, I grew up also in a family, a nuclear family with a mom and a dad. And I had one sister who was a year and three weeks younger than me, so it was just quite an ordinary nothing to report. Childhood, really. I think we did move around. I think we moved twice. To different areas with because of my dad's job at the time that that I did find moving really hard. Making new friendships everywhere I went, but having said that, now we've moved about 10. I don't know how many times I can't count. Maybe more than that. So in a way that. Was. Preparation and that's put me in in good stead for all the moves and now it's just like it's made me. It's strengthened me inside and I think that. Whatever we go through, even though they were just little things really. God can actually take and make us stronger and use them and it in a way it was a preparation for my later life when we moved a lot. So so that was good. Yeah. My sister and I are very different. We're still very different. We always have been. We grew up kind of separately really.
Speaker
We.
Speaker 3
She was a total opposite. She would she was always out playing and I was always in reading. Books. And we even went to separate brownie packs. Get that in the same family, but and guys, we went to separate ones and schools. We went different ways. But yeah, we're just very different. But we were normal. And I I do believe that everything that happened was for a reason and and God has used it, as you'll see in the rest of our story.
Speaker 2
So Christy and I met in our teens, I used to go to scouts and Adventure Scouts and we'd opened up our Venture Scouts, which was radical then to girls. We were one of the First Scout troops to actually do that. And we had a New Year's party, so of course. More girls will welcome like that, and Christine had a friend who was one of the girls that went to this scout group. And so Christine was invited to come along to this New Year's party, and that was the first time. That really that we met. We were playing a game passing balloons between your knees and somehow through that I asked Christine if she. Wanted to go. Out with me and amazingly, she said yes.
Speaker 3
Yeah, that was really funny that because it was a party game where you had two teams and it was whoever. Past the balloons, between the knees, all the way up the line. And so anyway. So Bob was next to me in the line, obviously and. I needed a lift home that night. Sounds really mean, but I needed a lift home that night. And Bob. Offered me one so. So yeah, so that's how we started going out. And I did think at the time I was, but Bob was an apprentice for British Airways and engineering. Division at the time and I was still doing my A levels. I did think Ohh he'd do for about 6 weeks. Bob doesn't know all this, and here we are, 49 years later. God had other plans.
Speaker 2
Yeah. So I I used to pick Christian up for school from school at summer nights. It's just amazing, really, that we've been around so long now with each other, but then I propose to. And we went to Virginia Water. And I was building up to the proposal and we sat by a waterfall on a rock and we were freezing and our bottoms were freezing. And yet I was trying to pluck up the courage to ask Christine to marry me. And she says, lastly, that she knew and she was just waiting.
Speaker 3
It was a cold. January night, wasn't it? It was pitch black and I actually became ill as a result of. That. But it was all worth it.
Speaker
Hey.
Speaker 2
Happy days. Yeah. So I guess our life together was only just starting, but. We had no connection with church whatsoever. My mom went to church, but Christie, mum and dad didn't. And and when we were considering getting married, it was like, well, what we're gonna do. Well, the only connection we have with a church was my mum. So why don't we start going along to a church? In my perspective, to get in with the vicar so he'd marry us, we just didn't feel that we could rock up and. Expect him to marry us when he didn't know who you are or whatever. So we started to attend the church as adults. Then rather than going to Sunday school or whatever that we've done early in our lives, and that was probably the start of our journey.
Speaker 3
Yes. So we used to go in the evenings with with Bob's parents to church and we got to know it was quite good. We got to know to start with, we just went because we had a of a kind of. Well, we had a plan, really, didn't we? We wanted to get married. We did make lots of friends there, and it was a really good experience and we still have some of those friends today. They're all around the world in loads of different countries. But we're still all in touch, lot loads and loads of us are still in touch. So. We've made very, really good friendships and we were so welcomed in that church, even though we had no idea about God whatsoever. We were just so welcomed in and. Invited people's houses for dinner and just became a real part of the family, I think. And then when we wanted to get married, we approached the Minister and in those days it's very different. These days we had meetings with him and he didn't do marriage training. Like you have these days where you have lovely times with lots of other people in the same situation and share notes and or all encouraged and prepared together, we were given a pile of about 8 or 10 paperback books. On marriage and different things and we then we were just sent away to read them all. Well, The funny thing is Bob doesn't really read books. So if I'm allowed to say this Bob didn't read any of them. That's right. I read all of them. Of course, because I always. At that stage did what I was told and.
Speaker 2
How things change?
Speaker 3
And the very last book that I wrote was a book called Holy The Holy Spirit and you? And I had no clue why that book was in a pile of marriage books, which is why I left it till last. But because I've been asked to read them all, I thought let's plough on with this one. So I read the book and it made absolutely no sense to me because I didn't know God at all. And then the last chapter was. About how to if you've read all this, how to give your life to Jesus so. Me being me, I. I thought. And this was before work one day, so I was just had a few spare minutes and I was reading this chapter and it said if you if you want to know the Lord and have him as your Lord and Saviour for you personally and pray this prayer. And so I thought. Totally separably, nothing else. I just thought ohh, that sounds like a good idea. I could pray that now before I go to work. So I prayed the prayer, which was to say sorry to God for all the things that I'd done wrong in my life. And to ask him to forgive me and to come into my life as my Lord and Saviour, and to have my life from there on in. And then I just said Amen and Tootled off to work. But it was about a miles walk. That was before I. Could even drive, and I was walking up the road thinking. Ohh well, that's a good idea. I've done that now. And I finished that book. Great. And as I was walking along the pavement, I felt as if I was about 3 foot up in the air just walking along. And I I could not work out. What on Earth was happening to me and the joy in me was just like. I've never sensed in my life before. It was just it should have been confirmation to me. That God had done something in my life and he'd come in, and that's what he was saying to me. And then I went back to work and just went back to normal, carried on my day. But then after that. I started thinking ohh well, I just prayed that prayer. That's not real. That's just that's just me, you know? That's good idea. I've done it. I had to. I read the book, blah blah, blah. And you know, that's the end of it. But I don't really think it's real. Why would God want me? Why would he do such an amazing thing? For me and then when we were still going to the church because we we wanted to get married and. The ministers had said Ohh. Make sure you read your Bible every day. Well, I had no clue where to start reading my Bible so I thought well, I'll start at Matthew. That's the beginning of the New Testament. Sounds like a good plan. So I just started on my own reading a bit through Matthew. I found a Bible in the house somewhere and. I came across a verse that said Immanuel means God is with you. And and. I then had a dream. Well, that was the other way round. First of all, I had a dream which that night. I had the word Emmanuel and I had no clue what it meant, and when I woke up in the morning, all I could think of was a bank account at the bank I worked at. Which was Emmanuel Bros and I can still remember the account number, which I probably shouldn't give out here in case it's still the same, but like 50 years later I can still remember it, which is a bit worrying probably. But I then. And then when I was reading my Bible, saw that in Matthew Emmanuel means God is with you, and I then knew for sure that the prayer that I had prayed. Back before I went to work that day was actually real and Jesus really was with me. So I guess in a way I was a bit of a doubt in Thomas because I had I had. I needed proof after that. But after that whole Emmanuel experience, I just know for sure ever since then. That God is with me, no matter what happens.
Speaker 2
So mine experience of becoming a Christian was at a similar time during the same preparation time leading up to us getting married. And I can remember the date. It was the 11th of May 1975. There was a visiting preacher. Isn't there always a visiting preacher when someone responds to? Jesus. But on this occasion this preacher was preaching on the story in the Gospels where it says there'll be two working in a field, one will be taken and the other one left. It's talking about the end times. And suddenly that struck my heart that I knew what I was like before God, and I knew I was the one going to be left because I didn't. Oh, God, I didn't have a relationship with him. And and going as an adult to church and hearing the gospel preached for the first time, I understood what Jesus did. When he died on the cross to pay the penalty for. Sin and on that occasion I just thought I need to repent now and ask God into my life. So I did that there and then in the service there was no call forward or whatever. It was just between me and God. And as usual, we finished up at Church, said goodbye to everybody. And went down the pub. That just seemed. To be our. Way of life at that time. But something changed in me from that very day and we pursued our relationship with God individually initially. But of course as we got married jointly as well. But one of the things that the church got involved in that we were intrigued by was they started doing evangelism courses and it was training people to share their faith. And the minister approached us and said we think you'd be doing well on this course. So why don't you join and we thought. OK. So we did. So. It was interesting because. We in our. First stages of being a brand new Christian, we're learning. How to share our faith? But by so doing, we actually learn what our faith was. And that was really so helpful. So in a sense, learning to share our faith was part of our discipleship training. And that's that's how I. Became a Christian to start with with. Then we got married. Happy Days, 1975 September the 6th and. We started attending the church and doing all these things and. There was a London City mission. Rally at our church. So they brought a London City mission alone and he spoke to the church. And I went along and. Heard their story about what the work they were doing in in London with the down and outs and people that on the streets and so on. And I was intrigued. But more than that, someone was moving in my heart. That was thinking, wow, that's amazing. I might be able to do that. But what happened during that meeting was why I'm thinking these things. The guy that was speaking from the and the sitting machine pointed at me and just said I think you'd make a good London City machine. Out of a group of probably 100 people, it was like where I wasn't even wearing a. Red shirt or anything I?
Speaker
Mean I there was.
Speaker 2
No reason why I stood out. Right. So after the meeting, I went up to him and said we think you're playing that, you know, it's like. Picking me up. Making me embarrassed in front of all these people. Well. And he was unrepentant. He just said well. Have you considered it? I said, well, no, he said. Well, perhaps you should. And of course, that got us into a process of thinking. Well, perhaps God is calling us into some sort of ministry, and I started going to various things that the London City mission put on in terms of preparation for. Considering joining the mission. Through that process, of course, it was like, do we want to go to London? Is that where we want to have a family and grow up with our children? It's like there were lots of issues that we had to deal with.
Speaker 3
Yeah, I was finding it very hard at that time because it would not have been at all easy as far as I I thought as a young mum I by then had, I think, two children. Debbie and David was a baby and we would have been moved around. Right. It was very costly. We would have had to have moved probably every two years, I think to somewhere else in in like in the inner city. And I had to keep coming before God and. Just giving it to him and saying, Lord, I'm going to find this so hard sending my children to different schools in what could potentially be really hard areas for. For for bringing up a family in London, I'd have to and I really, really struggled with that, but we even went to a joint interview at one stage and I told them that I really wasn't there on this and I didn't particularly want to go and they they were still accepting this and I really could not work this out. But then. We found out after a little while. It's always easy in hindsight, isn't it? To to realise these things that God was using the London City? Mission chapter as a testing ground in our lives and a preparatory ground because it then so happened that we met up with a guy called Vic Jacobson who? He rang.
Speaker 2
Evangelism explosion.
Speaker 3
Evangelism explosion, which was based in Southampton at the time he was running a course at our home church. And to cut a Long story short, we ended up going to work with him and for him, and also with the church plant in Southampton, which again was costly in lots of ways to us. But we knew that that was where God wanted us to go and so we'd give her an up. We'd given up any of our rights, really, and our and our personal preferences and we counted it just a delight to be able to go and serve the Lord, even though we only had. We had half whatever the annual salary at the time was. We got half of that. So the other half of our salary that we needed to pay our mortgage and live. At a very basic level, we had to rely on God for, and that was a real that was a real step out. We've never done anything like that before, but we can really say that we never lacked anything, and God always provided, even if it was. You know, at the if you test our faith and it will be at the 11th hour, so to say he always provided for example, once our car broke down well it broke down quite in a major way. It needed a new engine and we didn't have any money for that so. Then we somehow got enough money together to pay for the engine, but not for the labour, which was as much again so in faith. I couldn't. I wasn't there. I was still growing as a Christian and I didn't understand this, but Bob did. He put the car in the garage knowing we didn't have the money. For the labour but trust in God that we would by the time the car was fixed and. The day before. We were had to collect the car and we had a check through the door for the right amount exactly of the the missing. Amount of money for the repairs. And so we just, we were just, we were just so grateful. It's so fun when God provides for you in that way. And you know that it is God because he promises to be our provider. He promises to always be there for us and never let us go. And that so even though that was a stress, it grew. My faith and taught me to trust God and see how faithful he. Is.
Speaker 2
And. And nobody knew that that was the amount of money that we needed, which was always the significant thing. You know, it's easy to broadcast how much you need and ask people to give to it. But this was totally between us and God.
Speaker
Hmm.
Speaker 2
And during that time at Southampton it was quite a growing experience for us. We, we'd had a a woman in the church that worked for Samaritans and she phoned us up one night, bearing in mind we're part of the team of this church plant. And she said, oh, we've got a gentleman. The road that's got nowhere to sleep tonight. I wonder if you could help. It's just like, well, what? What do you mean? And basically what she meant was pick this guy up from the city centre in Southampton. Bring him back to your house, give him a bed, something to eat for the night. And then. Hopefully in the morning. He'll be gone.
Speaker
And it was like.
Speaker 2
Ohh my goodness. We got two young children in the house and but we just went with it and I went and picked this guy up and he was interesting character and we gave him something to eat and told him where showed him where the bathroom was and where he was. Sleeping. The bathroom looked like a bomb had hit it when he came out because I don't think he'd probably seen a bathroom for quite a while, and he certainly made the most of it, but that's good and I can't say that we slept very well that night knowing that there was this unknown person in our house. And then. In the morning. And it came. Down for breakfast? The kids were there, sort of wide eyed drinking. Who was this guy? He wore a boiler suit and blue boiler suit. I remember and carry. Thanks and. The kids were sort of bemused by this, but took it in their stride and then in the morning I dropped him back off, down in town and subsequently Christine and I, individually, but then together, both said, we think we entertained an Angel unaware because it was so significant to us the whole process and what happened. And there was another guy who came to our church. Again, from a a disadvantaged family situation, but he was married and had two children and he'd obviously got into financial difficulties previously because he told me that he'd had his electric and gas cut off back in the day when. They did cut. It off if you didn't pay your bill. And there were smoke rings on the ceilings where they'd had candles in the house just to be able to get light. So.
Speaker
He'd had a.
Speaker 2
Really tough time trying to bring up his family and he became a Christian, which was just amazing and him and his family all came along to church and when he got baptised. Well, when he went down into the water in baptism, he was covered in tattoos. But one in particular, he had a tattoo of the devil on his forearm. When he came up out of the water, there was a blank space on his forearm. It was obviously missing because the rest of his arms were covered and he was just amazed by this. But that didn't necessarily change everything of his circumstances. He was going on with God, and it was really wonderful, but he got threatened with eviction and and electric and gas cut off again. And because of his background, he had been in prison before. He phoned me up one day and. Said. I'm sorry, Bob. But I'm gonna do. A job. And I'm gonna top. Myself. That was his way of being able to provide for his family but not actually have to face life anymore. And and he would just pull up my heart. And but the irony was that phone call came on the morning of our son's birthday, and Christine had 12 kids coming round. We did for a party. And I'll send to Christine. I've gotta go. This guy's in desperate need. And you can imagine that family life wasn't all that conducive right at that moment. But I just felt that in my heart, I had to reach out to this guy and I found out where he was. He was in a pub. He was getting drunk and when I got there he was just in an altercation with a guy that was bald headed. He had a cross tattooed on his forehead, which was actually a crosshair, and his name was Nutter. And that was the target that he always went with. And they were just about in a fight. And me as a 20 year old something then just walked in between these two guys. But leading up to that, I was driving to this pub and. I'm thinking God, what is going on? You've just caused me to have an argument with my wife about the birthday party. I've. Got this guy. Who's doing all sorts of things, and I'm in the pee in the middle here. What am I supposed to do? How can I pray about this situation and suddenly in the? Car when I. Was driving to the pub I started speaking in tongues. It's just I didn't know what to pray and God gave me a new language to pray in and that was my first encounter. With praying in tongues. And it was just what I needed to put my heart in the right place and to be able to do what I did and managed to get these guys apart and took Danny away from it and we managed to sort of. But his bills and stuff in a way that was manageable and that set him on a a better trajectory.
Speaker
What?
Speaker 3
Yeah, so after Southampton we we went up north to a church, didn't we again Bob was going to be Minister of Evangelism. I can't really think of anything much to say about that area. Can you think of anything significant about the Stockton? Oh, yes, probably John Wimber.
Speaker 2
When you're working with. OK. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm working as a minister evangelism in this fairly traditional church and the things of the spirit were not encouraged, let's say. And during that time. I was experiencing a really bad headache now this had happened. Started happening when we lived in Southampton, but it was severe migraine type headache and it wasn't. It didn't come and it goes. It was there and it's still there even today and it's gone on for 40 years now just over. 40 years every day of my life, every night of my life, I have a headache. It's just pulsing in my head all the time with pain. So I started attending the hospital to try and find out what was the cause of this and we moved up to Stockton on tea. So I started the process up there and they did all sorts of tests and, you know, different scans and so on. And they couldn't find anything, but they did various trials like I have my sinuses. Build out to try and relieve any pressure that might be causing. I have brain scans. Neck X-rays. I had tablets for. Try this and tablets to try that and nothing of it was working. So I'd spoken to the pastor, who wasn't into healing at all, but I said, well, there's this guy, John Wingler, coming over to this country and he's experienced amazing healings in his environment. So would it be OK if I went to one of his conferences? And he was. A bit reluctant, but he said well knowing. Your headache condition. Yes, I think you know it'll be OK. That's how I. Knew it was in his experience. So yeah, I went to this John Wimber conference in Sheffield. For a week. And to say it was enlightening, it was, to say the least. Yeah, I mean, experienced God encountered God in in ways that I'd never known before. And, I mean, I was just on fire for God. I mean, something just switched on in my life, and suddenly it it was like the Kingdom of God has come. And I knew where God was, what he was doing, how how I saw him moving. And it was so exciting. So when I went back, I didn't get my headache healed even though I was up for it every time. But I did encounter God in a way that was just life changing. So when I got back, obviously Christine hadn't been there. She wanted to be there, but we had a family at home that she was looking after while I was there. But they started running a course in Durham for the John Webber material. So for quite a few weeks you went up there, didn't you, for this course.
Speaker 3
Yeah, a whole busload of about 50 people from our church went every Friday. Right to this course, which was teaching us all all about the things of the Holy Spirit and how God really wants to heal today, and how he wants us all to pray for others for healing. Because God died that we would not only be saved. And go to heaven, but that we would also have our our sicknesses of our body and our soul and our mind and our will and emotions. Healed. So he wants all of us healed. Totally. So this course was all about that, really. And it was on that course that I encountered God in through the Holy Spirit, and my life was never again the same.
Speaker 2
Hmm, so after the five years that we won term at that church, the church actually asked us to stay on. But our job was to train people to train people to share their faith. So in effect, working ourselves out of a job. And after five years, we felt we got as far as we could with that. There were people in place. That could be. Trainers and trained people. And if we stay being the paid staff. Then the people the church wouldn't take it on themselves. They would already rely on the paid staff. So as much as it was difficult for us to move at that point because our kids all settled in school, we had three kids by then, children by then, Sarah was born in Stockton and. We felt it was right to move and it was at the end of the 1980s when the house prices in London area went through the roof. I mean, they tripled in price, whereas in Stockton, I think ours went up about two and a half thousand. So the gap between the north and the South was so big, there seemed to be no way that we could afford to move back South. But God, he had other plans and we managed to get a mortgage that was just at that time irrational. But even that made us short of money. And my parents stepped up and and gave us a lump sum of money that we could put towards it. And so it was just about we could make it. We had a lovely house in Stockton. It was a four bedroom detached house. And yet in. London we had to buy a local authority house. That was. Well, three times the price of the one we had and we. Had a mortgage on that. One. So it was it was incredible. When we're just about to move, when all the calculations were in and the bills were starting to come together, we realised that actually we were short, that we didn't quite have enough. And there was no way. That we could get that extra money. Nobody, but nobody knew about that.
Speaker
No.
Speaker 2
However. We know someone did know about it because. On the morning that we had to pay the bill, we came down to the to breakfast in the morning downstairs and on the map there was an. Envelope. And we open the envelope and it had a building society check on it so we don't who it came from. No account on it. It's just a billing society. Check for the exact amount that we needed. And it was just like, wow, this is the confirmation that we're doing the right thing. God's in control. He's our provider. It's just again, one of those amazing things. So that sort of launched a new environment, moved back South and taking up new a new job and and new responsibilities.
Speaker 3
Yeah. One thing about that check, it was for £5000 that came through our door. It had it had a scripture text printed on the front. So we know that it was, it was from somebody more than likely in our church and that God had prompted them to give us that. And I must admit I was just like I was so intrigued. All I wanted to know I've got was who sent it. And I kept thinking, I kept thinking. Ohh. I wish they'd handwritten this cause I'm really good at recognising people's handwriting. But but we didn't. We just had, well, we gave all the glory to God, which is obvious. What they wanted. So. So yeah, so then. We moved back down South and eventually ended up in another church, which we were pastoring and the Holy Spirit fell in an amazing way it. It was probably around the 1995 time when the Holy Spirit. Working all over the world in a most amazing ways and. The Holy Spirit had fallen in the church in the area like God had just. For those that don't really get what I'm talking about. God, just like, come down upon a whole church come congregation. So that they could all feel something in their hearts and they could feel that their hands. Might have been tingling that somehow they all fell. Felt different and knew that the Holy Spirit God was there with them on that day. Lots of them were just falling out on the floor, just laying on the floor. Some were in tears. It was just amazing. The whole church and after that that church just wanted. They were all changed. By the power of God that day, and they were all so excited and wanted to tell everybody. So Bob invited them to come and share with our church, which was still local to them. What God had been doing in their church and. It was just amazing. They came and we did an ordinary service first for those that would have wanted it, and then we had people telling from the other church who the team came. We had people telling what God had done in their lives. One lady had had her back healed and she'd had back trouble for a long, long time. Lots and lots of healings and then people from our church went forward to get prayer to and. And the the so I by then I was just like the Holy Spirit. Come on. Me. I didn't know I'd never had anything like it in my life before and I couldn't really sit up right on my. There were pews in that church on my Pew. And so I'm like, I'm about 45° to my Pew, hanging on to the side. Trying to get normal. I was far from law and I knew that I could not go home like that. So when there was a call for everybody to go forward for prayer, I knew that there was no way I could do anything but go forward. So I did, of course, and when it was my turn, I was. I was at the back of the queue. And when it was my turn, the minister said, you can't be prayed for here. You're the minister's wife and I I thought non compute. I'd get that one. But on the way, walking two to be prayed for the Lord had said to me quite clearly choose this day. Whether you will go for me or whether you will go for and please the people that were, some of them were not very happy about what was happening. And I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I had. To just had to do, I just had to go for God. There's no option. When when God is really on you and you just love him so much and he's just blessing people in such an amazing way. I just want him. Want him more of him. So they prayed to pray for me because I just said yes, please. And then something. Ohh my goodness. Never happened to me before in my life. I fell down on the floor. You call it going out in the spirit in front of the whole church. Lots of them who were not very amused. And then I started. It's it never happened to me before. I was still so shocked that I did it there because normally I am not such an extrovert as this and I started laughing my head off in the Holy Spirit in front of the whole congregation right in front of the communion table, which in this church was the actual table was sacrosanct. So and there was me just laughing. For about 30 minutes and then I was saying Ohh Jesus, this is so amazing. But why here? Why not at home? Why here? This is so embarrassing. And then I saw Jesus walking towards. Me and I just saw him in my mind's eye. I've never seen him before. Like it walking towards me, and I knew that it was all right, but at the same time I'm laughing and I'm being embarrassed and I'm thinking, Oh my goodness, why not here? So I laid down there and I did not get up, even when. Jesus had gone and things had calmed down a bit. I was so embarrassed. I laid down there till everybody had gone home that night. About 8:00. And then I got up and went home.
Speaker 2
So it's one of those dilemmas that those experiences are both amazing but terrible as well, because there are those that will not like that environment. And as far as some people felt in the church and they were. Leaders in the church and we were spoiling or wrecking their church and they started to. Object in ways that were quite personal attacking on on us, but ultimately we felt that we'd been called of God there and our God experience was what we were sharing and but. At the end of the day, we won't turn a party line and those that had the say, so decided that we should no longer be the pastor of the of the church. So they asked us to leave. So it was a very difficult time. And as a result of that, I had to work through a whole lot of forgiveness issues and it took me it took a while, probably 6 months, I would think. After we left the church to be able to actually go around to one of the leaders that instigated our exit to actually. Front him up and say I'm sorry that we're we disagree on these issues, but I want to still feel as though that we can pass each other in the street and not feel intimidated by it. So I wanna be reconciled. So he was a bit shocked when I turned up on his doorstep. I've got to tell you, it took a few steps back, but it was good to be able to. Be reconciled, even though we were never then gonna have a pally relationship. But it meant that we could move on in peace, which was important. So there were. Some of our encounters as we went along ended up in a regular job in sales. It was good, did well. Our children got all got married, some had children. Our son got married. Didn't work out separated but. He had a motorbike. I was always into motorbikes. Ever since I've been able to ride one at 17 and. It's one of those things that it was his passion to and his last bike was a Yamaha R1, which is 1000 CC motorbike sports motorbike. I had a ride on it. It was amazing. However. It was to, unfortunately take his life, and there's a whole story that connects with that.
Speaker 3
Yeah. So he used to come round to our house to wash his motorbike because he lived in a flat and didn't have a garage or an outside Hut. So we came in very handy for that. So we see him quite often when he was washing and polishing his bike. And well, I remember one day clearly when I I said goodbye to him and took his helmet off and gave him a hug. I just. Because he had a bike, I always wondered whether I would see him again. Ever. And this was a very powerful motorbike. He'd gone around Europe on it, done the Nurburgring and Spa and different places the month before. But that did happen to be that day did happen. To be the last time that I ever saw him. Because I think it was about 10 days after that, our younger daughter Sarah. Had baby Max in the morning and in the evening, it was a lovely summer's day in July we had a policeman on our doorstep at 6:00 in the evening. We were just about to go out to visit our new grandson, who had just been born and. We knew well. I knew as soon as the policeman was there what it was. So what happens? But he's he made me sit down in my chair, which I'm glad he did. And he said that David had had had a motorbike accident and. They him and his friend had gone lovely, sunny afternoon. They'd gone to Oxford along the MA 40 because they run parallel and they were coming back and they've done a little detour down a little country Rd halfway down a scar, a hill, which was a very steep scar. Page of the hill. And they'd gone round a bend and they weren't speeding because there were witnesses on the road to which I was so pleased about a a van came the other way and. The van was on the opposite side of the road to David, but David was going round the bend right on the centre. On the dotted lines, basically, and I don't know quite what happened, but the two collided and and David there was no way because of the sharp hill, nowhere for the van to get out of the way. David his bike crashed into the front of the van. He obviously because he loved it. Very much hung on until the very last moment. Threw himself off. And I hope this doesn't upset you guys too much, but his head went under the wheel. The front wheel of the van. And his body was just thrown and he died. But then so we had the we had the police on the doorstep and we were about to go and visit our new grandson so. We're now just in turmoil and they it people do say the hardest thing is when you have extreme grief and extreme joy at the same time. How do you manage all those emotions? And humanly speaking, I don't know how we would have, but God just took over. It was. He was so amazing. We just knew as soon as the policeman went and while he was still phoning David's partner from outside our house, the motorbike was still out there. We just remembered a scripture verse in the Book of Ecclesiastes which says, weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice. And I really shocked myself because I suddenly became very efficient. And I I just knew. I said to Bob, basically, we can't do anything about David now. Meaning basically the undertakers are shut. And that mean that sounds so blunt. But I just my whole body went into. We need to work out what to do. Right now. We can't do anything until tomorrow. Very mad. Fat. We need to drive to the hospital and see our grandson. And Bob was saying. I don't know if I can do this. I said it's OK. I'll go on my own. I just knew that we could read later, but we had a choice. Now whether or not we rejoiced with my daughter and her her first child, or whether. Her that day of her life was robbed too, because I don't believe it was God's will that David died. And I don't believe it would have been God's will either. For Sarah's first day of being a mummy, to be spoiled either. So, so God just gave us the strength. It was amazing. We walked into the hospital. And we sat there and Sarah and her husband Rob, were there and little Max and Sarah had had the crash cart five times during her birth. Her delivery. So I don't know what was going on in our family that day, but she pulled through, but she was very ill and they were telling us about how David had messaged them that afternoon when he and his friend had stopped on their bike ride. For a drink which we heard in the inquest later was a soft drink which was also helpful to me as a mum to know. And David was saying, our, I don't think I'll be back in time tonight. I'll come and see you tomorrow. Is that OK? And so they, Sarah and Rob were reading out these messages to us and they were expecting our David to be visiting tomorrow. And we just went along with the whole thing. Not saying anything but knowing full well that David would not be going to see them tomorrow, but I take I take I take. Some joy from the fact that David knew that he had a little nephew and he actually knew about Max, and I think that's lovely. Yeah. So. And then of course, after that, we were into managing a funeral and looking after a new baby, a new mum and a new baby. So. But all through it all, it was so easy. And on that, that was Tuesday. God just enabled us and gave us the strength, and we knew what to do. And and the church, our church and our church family was so amazing. I mean, the night after the night of David dying. I called my friends in my house group when I got home and they all came round and and comforted me and we chatted and and Bob had to go with because he promised with Rob Sarah's husband, to wet the baby's head. So he wept down the pub. So he went down the pub and had a drink with Rob. And still they had no idea that David had died. But God supernaturally gave us that strength. And I I'm just so grateful, even to this day, that that's the way we chose to play things and and then the next day we told Sarah and the family just praying that they wouldn't have found out on Facebook that night from some of David's friends who obviously knew so anyway. Yeah. So that's that story really.
Speaker 2
It was a tough time. There's no getting away from the fact, you know, we've lost a child and and that changes everything in your family. For me, it was significant in that, David my only. Son. And from Akamai's point of view, the guys listening to this will probably appreciate that it's it's about the family name. It's about the heritage. It's it's the boy things, the banter, the growing up. Seeing your son take on your mantle so. Yeah, it's. I struggled with it for quite a long time. In fact, I I saw how I went to cruise for counselling. Which I found helpful talking it through with somebody and Christine and I went on a a retreat provided by care for the family, for bereaved parents. And again it wasn't something that we wanted to do. Go and meet people we never met before and talk about something. It was so personal. And sad to us, but actually we found it really helpful. And so we're thankful to the people that encouraged us to to go on it. But the whole dynamics of family changes when something like that happens and. One of the things that we learnt certainly on that family weekend care for the family weekend was that 95% of couples break up after the death of a child, which is a phenomenon. Number and I guess with God you can cope with everything, but we're still human and we we react and we say things we don't mean because we're in an emotional roller coaster and I think the way that Christy and I managed to come through it together was that. We allowed each others space to to grieve differently because Christina's processing of the. Of the the. Death was was different to mine and still is, and so it's understanding that and and supporting one another as you're going through that journey. But the bottom line is God is with us and and he changes everything he he gives hope when there is no hope. We know that because David committed his life to the Lord when he was young, that it's God's job to keep him. And and God has kept him and. And we know where he is now. And so there's hope for the future as there is for all who know Jesus. If it relied on me to keep being good enough. To get to heaven, I'm stuffed. I've got no hope, but because I know it's by grace that I'm saved through faith. And it's not of me, it's of God. I can trust him for that. So our journey has been interesting. We've gone through both of our now all of our children being separated, divorced, and all of the implications that come with that, with the children and our role in the family. But somehow God has just kept us going and. We just give glory to God for every bit of it.
Speaker 3
Hmm. Yeah, we never thought that our lives would take such a. A A journey as they have, I guess, like most of us, we just think we're going to trawl through life and and we thought we'd have like, have our children. They'd all be Christians because to us that it's very important that God is the most important thing in our lives. So the most important thing to us is to bring up a Christian family. And and to see our children, they all came to faith when they were about 5 and were all loved Jesus, which were so great. For but to see all these ups and downs and and then to see our children divorced, it's just like I didn't think that happened. Maybe I had a a very 1970s nine set because I think now there's a lot more divorce in the world. I didn't think that that would ever happen to us. It was new to our families. But God has brought all of us through that through it all, and our children are still standing, and they're stronger. They've got new relationships now Debbie's getting married next year, and they are still all going on with God, which to me is just. Amazing that through it all, not just Bob and I, but our children too, are just hanging on to God. We don't blame God in any way for anything bad that's happened. We know he's allowed it, but there is also a verse that says that he works all things together for good. For those who love the Lord riches. Us and we believe that he's done that in our lives and we are much stronger for it and. And and we hope that our story has got little bits in it that will maybe bless you today, whoever you are, wherever you are, we, we hope and pray that you'll be able to get something from our story that God can take and use to encourage you and bless you and just a little thing. About the care for Family Weekend, we went on. They still do those every year. I think in about October if any of you fancy going down that route and seeking their help.
Speaker 4
Amazing. I think you might be too humble to tell this bit of your story, but I'd love it if you could tell. To me, like when you talked to me originally about your son and and the bit that struck out to me was just like the forgiveness and. I would love.
Speaker 3
Of the inquest.
Speaker 4
I would love for you to tell that.
Speaker 3
Little bit. Ohh yeah sure. Yeah, sure. So because David it was a head on motorbike accident. And as I said, he, his head, went under the van. But. But. When Bob had to go to the, he had to go to the Mortuary to identify him and God, I didn't go. I could not do that. I wanted my last memory of David to be. When I last gave him a hug and said goodbye to him because I knew that if I saw him. You know, with no life. I would then have to work through the process of forgetting or working through that picture. So it was really a selfish thing, but Bob went with my brother-in-law to the inquest and there was not one mark, just a or. There was a tiny bruise on his forehead. He had such a good motorbike helmet. And I believe God preserved. Him preserved his head. He looked as if there was nothing wrong with him when we had to identify him and I just thought that that was in that awful situation. A little gift from God to us because we would have had to have identified him anyway because of the accident we had. To wait six months, which to us seemed like a long time but is apparently normal, and I know now people wait a whole lot longer to go to an inquest in Oxford. And we had a coroner that we worked with who, amazingly, was a Christian too, and she was just such a blessing to us. We arrived in Oxford and some of our family came with us. Sarah, our daughter, who had the baby on the day Max died, was there with Max in the buggy. And and I just knew that as a Christian, I needed to. Its peace is so important to me. And since I've come to know the Lord. And I think one of the most my highest values is to walk in peace with everybody. I don't want my peace robbed or letting the enemy get in and steal it in any way and. I was just aware that this poor guy who had been driving the van had nowhere to go when there was the collision. And yet he was totally unharmed, and he had he had to go home that night and carry on living his life with his family. With that whole trauma of having his van lifted up with a motorbike going under it and the whole scenario, I can't imagine what he went through on that day. So when we arrived at the at the court. I saw a man walking in after a while. The guy in his probably mid 50s and I knew straight away of all these people it was so random. I knew that he was the van driver so I went to we had policemen with us. I asked him if I could go and speak with him. And they said. Not now. They'd have to ask because I guess that was an unusual request, and perhaps they thought I was gonna go and give him a word or two that, you know, I don't know. Give him a piece of my mind or something. But anyway, I just wanted to go and make peace with him. I didn't know if I was gonna be allowed, but after the inquest, the police came to me. Two men. And they said I could, but they had to come with me. So it's just this is so weird. Me with two bouncers. But anyway, and I'm only 5 foot, nothing. So I went to this guy escorted and I just said to him. And I'm not boasting in any way in this. I know that it's a bit of an unusual thing to do, but I just know that this is what God wanted me to do, and I just so want, as I said, to walk in peace in my life and to be obedient to God. And I have such compassion for this poor man. So. I went to him and I said who I was. I said I'm David's mum. I'm really sorry that you had to go through this experience. If you'd have been a minute or two earlier or later, your life now would have been so different, but I want you to know from the bottom of my heart and I want you to know in the depths of your being, through and through that not me, not Bob, my husband, not any of our family in any way. Hold you responsible for what's. Happened. We want to totally. We don't need to forgive you. But we want you to know that we don't hold you responsible and we don't want you to hold any guilt whatsoever. And if it's at all possible, we want you to go on and live the rest of your life and enjoy it as if nothing's happened. Now I don't know where he is now and I don't know how that's worked out in our life. And then I just gave him the biggest hug. Look, which I didn't realise at the time, was probably not a normal thing to do and and policemen were just sat there with that had been at the at Rd accident scene. We just sat there with tears running down their eyes and then he went and we also were told of a nurse who had. Been following David on his bike in the traffic. You, when the accident had occurred, how miraculous that God had put a nurse there in the next car and she went and she attended to him. And I wasn't allowed to contact her directly. But I wrote her also a letter. She was not at the inquest. I wrote her a letter and sent it to the police station and they forward it. To her, just thanking her for just being one of God's angels at that time. Just put in the right place and for what she did, even though David was already dead. I just thought there are so many. So many miracles in this situation. God definitely had his hand in it all, and he never leaves us or forsakes us. Even in the depths of that time and that day, God's fingerprint and handprint just holding us was there all over and in ways that we could never have dreamed or imagined. So there is so much to thank God for in that whole incident.
Speaker 2
People have often said to me, how Can you believe in God when something like that happens and my immediate reaction is how can you not? Where have you got to turn to? Who can you go to when, when your world falls apart, I mean. What do you do? I mean, we live in a broken world. Should I expect God to pause gravity for a minute while he went around that bend so that he wouldn't have fallen off? I mean, it's just irrational. We live in a world that's fixed, but it's broken and we have to deal with the stuff, knowing that ultimately. God's got the answer. And that's why we trust him.
Speaker 4
Amen. That was amazing. I just think. That story of. Not forgiveness. I guess you didn't have to forgive him, but just that it it it's it's only through your faith that I think that that kind of. Just it's so powerful. And then and a lot of people would just struggle to even understand that. But it is, it is by grace that you can do that. And I just think that's incredible and.
Speaker
Hmm.
Speaker 4
We would love it if it's anyone listening that is going through something or has gone through something just I'd love for you guys just to pray over them.
Speaker 2
Yeah, father. God, we thank you that each one of our journeys is watched over by you. Lord, you are there, even though we're not aware of it so often. But you are a God of love, and you're a God of forgiveness, and you're a God of compassion. You're a generous God. You're a forgiving God and Lord. We just want to thank you for that. And Lord for. Anybody that might be listening on this podcast? Lord, I just pray that you'll meet them right now, right where they are. And Minister, your love to them. May they get an awareness of how much you love them and how much compassion you have for them, and that you're with them in the journey that they. One. So, Father, I just pray that they might know Jesus, that they might know the power of your Holy Spirit and that they might know the love of a heavenly Father as they walk through life.
Speaker 3
And Lord, I ask this, and if there's anybody listening right now that. As as can identify with some of these events, because they've gone through the same or similar things or are even right now going through some of those events. Lord, I ask that you're you're give them hope deep in their spirits, father. They'll you'll give them deep hope that there is always hope in life, that there is always abundant life to come, no matter what has happened. You've always got more for us. You've always got good things for us, even when we can't. Believe that there is even any more life, even when we want to take our lives, Lord, because things are so bad. Lord, I ask, you'll give those people hope, hope and that your cause them to be able to look to you, Lord, and that you would birth your loving. And let them know that they're loved, whether they know you right now or whether they don't. You love us all, and you are so kind and compass. Passionate and have a plan for each and every person. You even know how many hairs each of us have got on our heads, which is a miracle and amazing as best as they drop out all the time. But we thank you Lord, and we ask that you're just use these words that we've spoken to. Bless each person your how you want to use them. You'll take those words and minister them to each person. Amen. Amen.
Speaker 1
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Speaker
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Speaker 1
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