The Pursuit of Happiness - Episode 3

This phenomenon has been debated for thousands of years—where does happiness come from?  

We are all in pursuit of it, but what exactly are we pursuing? 

In this episode, Justin makes a proposal as a peace offering for those who have been discouraged on their journey in life, and Don shares stories that detail the important keys needed for finding and living a true state of joy. 

Transcript

[00:00:00] Justin: Hi everyone, this is Justin 

[00:00:34] Don: Obrantz, and this is Don Schaefer. 

[00:00:36] Justin: And you are listening to the Wise and the Wandering podcast for those who know the way and for those who are led astray. And if you feel like you fall into either of those categories, then you're in the right place. So let's dive in. So Don, what are we going to talk 

[00:00:53] Don: about today?

[00:00:54] Don: Well, I think we're going to be talking about happiness here. I think it's an important element in everybody's [00:01:00] life, and a lot of people lack it. 

[00:01:02] Justin: Yeah, no, I agree. And I guess, why would you say people are 

[00:01:06] Don: lacking happiness?

[00:01:08] Don: Well, sometimes you have to understand what creates happiness, and a lot of times, you know, happiness a lot of times is a sign of a good heart. And, people sometimes, because of the things they do in life and, the areas that are affecting their life. They allow themselves to be robbed of a happiness.

[00:01:27] Don: And I, and just uh, put a little foundation to this sort of thing. A lot of people seek after happiness in different ways. I know, uh, we were created to serve one another. And a lot of times when we serve one another, that's where we Find true happiness and God has created us that way. But a lot of times people are just serving themselves.

[00:01:46] Don: So they allow themselves to get into the position where it's hard for them to find happiness because somebody else has to make 'em happy. And when we realize it's our responsibility for our own happiness, the things we do, it isn't somebody else's [00:02:00] responsibility to make us happy. But we, we ourselves. I know a lot of times I run into people that come up and say, Don, I'm not happy.

[00:02:07] Don: And I always ask them, what are you doing? Because, uh, you know, something has to be done there. 

[00:02:12] Justin: Right. I think so, and I think it all starts with ourselves. And I think the underlying question everybody has is how do I achieve happiness? I think everyone, you know, largely thinks that happiness comes from success.

[00:02:26] Justin: Happiness comes from popularity. Happiness comes from, fulfillment in your career or, your personality. Or your identity, and that there's a happiness that's essentially like this kind of contentness that's supposed to come with that. It's almost like the ultimate level of pleasure that can be achieved.

[00:02:49] Justin: And I think that's, when we look at happiness, the way that we are looking at it. That's what makes it not be, obtainable for us. I think we're looking at [00:03:00] happiness the wrong way. I think we think of happiness the wrong way. I guess, having said that, what do you think happiness is? How would you define happiness?

[00:03:10] Justin: Okay, 

[00:03:10] Don: well I, I define happiness as having like an inner, A lot of times what happens in life is people go and maybe buy a new car, or they get themselves a brand new house, or they do something and see their favorite band play to create some happiness. But what that really is, is just a happening. It happens and then it's over.

[00:03:36] Don: You know, what God wants to do is He wants to get us into a place where we're happy all the time. Where we wake up happy. You know, the Bible talks a little bit about having joy in the morning. And a lot of times it's the way we look at life, the way we process life, the things we do, and also seeking after the things of God that creates a happiness inside of us.

[00:03:58] Don: And that's where you don't need [00:04:00] a whole bunch of money. You know, a lot of your wealthiest people are some of the most unhappiness. I'm not saying that money doesn't, doesn't help with happiness. You know, having a little bit of money can make a person happy sometimes. But, uh, it isn't the element that has to be there.

[00:04:15] Don: And some of the happiest moments sometimes are situations where people do not have a lot of money. You know, they're struggling that way, but, but yet they find happiness in life because they're doing the right things. They're, serving one another, seeking after one another, uh, to help one another. And they're also seeking after God and keeping in a relationship with Him.

[00:04:34] Don: Yeah, 

[00:04:35] Justin: and I think that people, I think You hit it on the head, and I think that when it comes to finding happiness, you have to look, I guess, one person has to look within themselves first to find happiness. And I think that relationship with God is so important to actually achieving happiness. And I would even say that the word itself is probably more equivalent to, it's joy.

[00:04:58] Justin: That's what you said. Yeah. To living [00:05:00] in joy. Yeah. And rather than I mean, it could be called happiness, but I think what we're really talking about is joy and living in joy and rejoicing is in terms of an action and, living in the state of like a, I guess, consistent contentment with what we have and with what we are and with who we are.

[00:05:17] Justin: Yeah. And I think that's so important to have God, because I think up until then, if there is resentment in your heart, if there is resentment in your life, if there is a, Bitterness that's in your life. That's bad. You're that's gonna that's gonna block you from getting happiness Oh, yeah, that's gonna that's gonna completely block you from being able to feel happiness Yeah, and everything that you do in your life.

[00:05:41] Justin: It won't even matter because there's that bitterness. There's that um, Resentment that's just that completely negative Barrier that's stopping you from achieving it. Oh, I 

[00:05:51] Don: like that. I like that because I know the Bible says that bitterness is the root of all evil And so what it does it robs us, you know, it creates [00:06:00] resentments.

[00:06:00] Don: It creates jealousies creates anger Creates all this stuff and like you're saying there Justin it swipes us from the opportunity to have happiness And that's where we have to be at peace with God and and our fellow man And and we can develop a happiness inside and you can see it in people I can see happy people because what do happy people do justin they get something on on their face Most of the time I smile they smile.

[00:06:27] Don: That's right. You know happy people smile a lot You know, it's a lot of times I see people when they got smiles on their face you know, it gives me kind of a warm feeling inside because Now that's a happy person. And it doesn't have to be at some special event. They don't have to have some special car or anything like that.

[00:06:44] Don: They can be just walking down the street. And you can, you can pick them out. You know, I know the Bible talks a little bit about the fruits of the Spirit. You know, the righteousness, peace, joy, happiness, meekness, temperance, against such there's no law, you know. And that's where the Bible tells [00:07:00] us, you will know them by their fruits.

[00:07:02] Don: So a lot of times when I see people, I can tell what they're doing in their life. I can tell what they're not doing in their life, just by their facial expressions. You know, they say it's a lot easier to smile than to frown, takes less muscles. A lot of people in life, they look so tormented. So sad, you know, am I ever going to be able and sometimes you feel in life like you got to make them happy You know, I mean, I like this use cheerful comments I like to say things and try to get a smile on people's faces, but it's work You know, it's work when people aren't doing what they need to to stay happy and like you're saying Justin, It's the joy that God pours into our life as we develop a relationship with him 

[00:07:41] Justin: Yeah, and I think it's just distinguishing and knowing that you can only truly be happy with having a relationship with God.

[00:07:52] Justin: Yeah. And having God be a part of your life versus trying to do it all on by yourself. Yeah. And maybe you can [00:08:00] be happy trying to do it all by yourself, but it's going to be a whole lot easier having a relationship with God. Oh yeah. Because he wants you to have happiness. Yep, yep. He wants you to have joy.

[00:08:10] Justin: That's right. I mean, if we're talking about the Bible, and all the terms, all the times that it says rejoice in the Lord, you know, rejoice. I think that's just, that's a, that's a strong theme in the Bible, but the Lord wants you to have happiness. That's right. Jesus preached. People having joy in their lives.

[00:08:28] Justin: He did. People preached, people having happiness in their lives. And, you know, if, if you understand how it all works. And you can understand that if that's what Jesus wanted for people and God essentially sent Jesus to the world to save his creation. To save the world. If you believe it or not, at least if you understand it, having known that, I have a proposal.

[00:08:57] Justin: You do? Allow me to make a [00:09:00] proposal. There you go. Maybe to you, to anybody who's listening right now. Having known that about Jesus and what God did for the world, I guess, can you find forgiveness in your heart for God? Who? Because He found forgiveness in you. Yes, He did. And He found forgiveness in you before you were even 

[00:09:20] Don: born.

[00:09:21] Justin: Yeah, that's true. And you came into this world already forgiven. So, can you forgive God? You know, because God has the ultimate authority. So most people aren't going to position things this way and say, you know, to basically, you're putting yourself in authority over God. Yeah. You have to be able to grant forgiveness to God, but not even that.

[00:09:41] Justin: I just think that there's that bitterness, there's that resentment. Oh yeah. Situations that you've been through in your life, those negative experiences that you've had maybe with religious people that have allowed you to not maybe accept a relationship with God. That's true. So maybe that's the forgiveness that you need to finally start [00:10:00] achieving 

[00:10:00] Don: happiness.

[00:10:01] Don: That's true, you know, and yeah, because so many times people blame God for everything. And no matter what happens, you know, if the, if it's a rainy day, he gets the blame for it. You know, it doesn't matter what it might be. And, what Justin is saying is so true. You know, we have to have a, a forgiving heart.

[00:10:15] Don: And it's interesting to looking at Jesus because he counted it all joy in the things that he did for us. The suffering and being able to set us free. And he was a perfect example of giving of oneself. to find true joy, which Jesus did. He had absolutely nothing when he left this world. You know, they even took his clothes at the end, but yet the Bible says he found it all joy, in doing just that.

[00:10:40] Don: And it's an example for us. Cause it isn't about things, it isn't about what we can do and all that sort of thing. It's the relationship that we can have with Him and with other people. And our relationship to learn to love other people, to be able to serve other people. It's through this that we get joy.

[00:10:59] Don: And I know a [00:11:00] lot of times we can use. Christmas time is an example. What joy it is for parents, you know, to give their Christmas presents to their children and see the excitement in that child. I mean, you work for it, you slave for it, whatever you did, you give it to your child and they're excited.

[00:11:17] Don: And it's the same thing with God. You know, He's got so many gifts that He wants to give us, and what joy He sees in our excitement in all that He has to give and be able to open up our lives and smile and get excited about Him. Powerful times, Justin. Yeah, and you talked 

[00:11:33] Justin: about before the fruit of the Holy Spirit, you were mentioning that before.

[00:11:36] Justin: Yeah, yeah. And I know it says in the Bible, it might be like Galatians, but it says that Having joy in advanced circumstances is only possible with the fruit of the Holy Spirit, which would be joy. I mean, having joy in advanced circumstances. So no matter what you're going to go through, you're going to rejoice in it.

[00:11:56] Justin: No matter what it is, you're going to be content in all [00:12:00] ways. Um, which is probably easier said than done. But I think that's maybe what true happiness is, is I think the consensus that we're coming to here. To be fully content in, in all ways and to constantly have a joy 

[00:12:14] Don: in your life.

[00:12:14] Don: Oh, yeah. You know, and the Bible also talks about, which is getting to what you're saying here, Justin, is this is the joy of the Lord is my strength, so in life a lot of times. We're very weak. See, if I lose my temper, if I get all twisted out of shape, and I get a bad attitude and all this stuff, and I start looking at things in the wrong way, I am not very strong as far as joy and stuff is.

[00:12:38] Don: And a lot of this is indicators. Because when I get away from Doing things for Him, or seeking after Him, or helping other people, serving other people. You know, the, the nature of our bodies when we're born into this world is a very selfish nature. It seems like when we're not doing things for other people, we gravitate [00:13:00] back to a selfish way.

[00:13:01] Don: Real quick, and a lot of times the indicators are our attitude, the way we see things, and that's where, if we can do the right things, what happens is the joy of the Lord becomes our strength. It's the area of life that I can, doesn't matter what it might be. I mean, I can lose the roof of my house, but it doesn't mean that I have to lose my joy.

[00:13:21] Don: Things can happen. I can get a flat tire on the freeway, but it doesn't mean that I have to lose my joy. I can continue to be at peace at Him. I know my dad used to say, uh, it's never so bad that it can't be worse. And he said stuff like, or, it too shall pass. And it's true, you know, a lot of times in life.

[00:13:39] Don: We develop our happiness, we develop our joy, and it becomes our protection. It protects us against a bad day, a rough day, or whatever might, circumstance might come our way. And, uh, to have that, leaving the house in the morning is a powerful tool to have in our tool belt. Because not every day is perfect.

[00:13:58] Don: Not every day is perfect. 

[00:13:59] Justin: [00:14:00] Yes, and I think that we talked about just before about Jesus preaching joy to the world, but I also think that a lot of people don't understand that He was a happy Christ. And I think that, I mean, his very first, miracle that was performed was at a wedding, where, you know, people are coincidentally feasting and dancing, and there's wine everywhere.

[00:14:28] Justin: So, I mean, that tells you, surely, He did not frown on mirth, you know, he was he was very fond of happiness And yeah and living out joy and showing it in his actions and his works and wonders and miracles 

[00:14:43] Don: He got into it. He got into it 

[00:14:46] Justin: yeah, and I think that's important to understand because we live in a world where it's almost Impossible to find this thing that we're talking about called happiness because I think we're only [00:15:00] we can only search for it and we can only look for it in our earthly ways We're not pursuing it in a spiritual way And I think so when you talk about that when we hear that phrase the phrase is the pursuit of happiness, right?

[00:15:13] Justin: it's been used in countless times before in essays and Historical documents the pursuit of happiness needs to be something that's pursued spiritually as well as Yeah. Physically. Oh yeah. I don't, I don't think that can be just fully achieved in our earthly, selfish ways. No. I don't think so. It's continuous.

[00:15:36] Justin: And I think that that relationship with God is so important because I think that whether people want to understand it or not, you're already communicating with the spiritual realm and you're engaging indirectly a lot of the times in the spiritual realm and that in a negative way. And the evil way, however you want to, whatever you want to call it, and you [00:16:00] don't even realize it.

[00:16:01] Justin: That's right. So in some cases, you don't even, you don't want to be spiritual at all. You don't consider yourself spiritual at all, not knowing that you're directly engaging in the spiritual realm. Yep. Yep. Through certain things that you're watching and listening to that you're coming in agreement to.

[00:16:19] Justin: And you're allowing to kind of maybe manifest in your life. Not knowing that you could be putting just as much effort and power into, I guess, building a relationship in the spiritual realm with God. That's right. And doing it the same way. Coming into agreement with the things of God. Coming into Agreement with, the things that God likes and coming into disagreement with the things that God hates.

[00:16:46] Don: Right, right. And that's, I like the way you said, uh, the pursuit of happiness, because I think it is a pursuit. And a lot of times people pursue it in the wrong way. But, it should be something I think we seek all the time. And [00:17:00] then, you know, like you look at the wrongs, you know, a lot of times people hate that word they call sin, but it's actually wrong.

[00:17:06] Don: It's just wrong. A lot of that there is identified because these are areas here that. Tend to rob us from the joy and the happiness. You know, a God only wants the best for us and he's set up some guidelines saying, you know, some of this stuff, if you get involved, it just robs you from your happiness. It causes guilt, it causes shame, it causes a lot of different things.

[00:17:28] Don: And that's where, when you say, when we get back to the person that's not smiling a lot of times. They've been robbed. They could have had the joy. They could have had a lot of excitement and things in life, but they've never understood the fact that there are robbers out there trying to swipe that from you.

[00:17:44] Don: And if you're fortunate enough to have lived in a good household where your parents are happy, joyful, and they raise you in a way where they help you through circumstances, the hurts. The pains, all this sort of thing, teaching [00:18:00] you how to get over things, how not to allow bitterness to enter into your life, getting you in a place where you can be totally happy.

[00:18:07] Don: I know my grandson, he went, uh, he had a charmed childhood. He lived in a household, everybody loved him, he was just You know, everything was grand and then he goes to, kindergarten and he comes up to me. He says, Hey, grandpa, he says, there's some nasty kids in that class. And I said, I sat down, his name is Logan.

[00:18:27] Don: I'll give a shout out to Logan, but, uh, but yeah, but I, uh, I told Logan, I says, Logan, I says, these kids probably were raised in households where they were not treated well. You know, so they've learned how to be angry, they've learned how to be nasty, learned all these types of things. And I told them, I said, you have a choice to make.

[00:18:46] Don: Either you can let these kids keep their problem, or you can allow that problem to become your problem. And when you allow problems like that to become your problem, what it is, it is a joy killer. It's a happiness killer, because it swipes you. It [00:19:00] swipes right out of your heart. And pretty soon, you've got an attitude, and you know, and that's, there's nothing worse than living in life with an attitude, and 

[00:19:08] Justin: uh, Yeah, I think it definitely starts with our attitude, and our attitude is definitely so important to that pursuit of happiness.

[00:19:16] Justin: I think there's a lot of, Factors that come into play when it comes to achieving happiness, you know, you can go back to the the early philosophers of the time like the Plato's and the Socrates and they were all these guys were trying to make sense in any way that they could of Many things but happiness was one of them and just trying to Explain it to people in a way that would make sense, in a way that would allow people to fulfill the actual feeling and completely understand it.

[00:19:51] Justin: And I don't think anyone has really been able to completely figure that out. And I think even until, even in today's time period, I think we're [00:20:00] still looking for answers as to, you know, we wouldn't be pursuing something if we haven't figured out. The pursuit of happiness is A direct indication that we haven't completely understood it.

[00:20:10] Justin: And I think that, again, the full understanding comes when you allow God into your life. When you allow God into your heart, that's true, and you open up Those opportunities to be mended in certain ways that you couldn't 

[00:20:24] Don: before. Yeah, that's true But I can help with that Justin and I want to do that I can help with that because there is a pattern that that people can follow I can't say this works for everybody But I realize that in life, it's little increments.

[00:20:39] Don: It's the little things you do. A lot of times people think that they have to do something big to get joy and happiness in their life. But a lot of times, it's the little things. And I know in marriage relationships, I teach this stuff. I teach that feelings always follow actions. So it's the actions that you do will create Feelings inside and then those can be feelings of [00:21:00] joy happiness a lot of different things So what you need to do is find the little things that you can do in life To serve other people to do certain things that help in whatever ways you can And what happens is your attitude towards people and situations seem to change It doesn't have to be something huge But the little things you do like, you know, even like we talk about smiling That's one thing but I know a lot of times in my life I, um, I try to, you know, help out in whatever way there might be.

[00:21:29] Don: I might find a piece of paper in the parking lot, you know, and I pick it up and I put it into the trash can. Little thing, but you know what it does? It works inside of me. Yeah, I'm helping whatever business it might be. Picking up some trash outside, but it's what I'm working on inside of me. I feel like I'm servicing or helping in some way or some fashion.

[00:21:50] Don: And these little things they build and they're become big things. So a lot of times when you want big joy, big happiness, wake up with happiness, constantly look at the little [00:22:00]things you can do in life in your relationships. How can I love my wife, husband, my children, the people around me? How can I find ways of?

[00:22:08] Don: doing things for them. Maybe a phone call, maybe buy him a soda. The other day I went and got a soda for a guy. He says, I'm looking for a good karma. You know, he looked at me kind of strange, but a lot of that, you know, I was doing it for him, but I'm doing it for me too. I'm doing it for me too. Right. 

[00:22:23] Justin: I agree with that. And I could say that it all starts with helping out other people as well. I know we talked about that in purpose and I think happiness comes with purpose and I think those two kind of that coexist together in a way because when you feel like you have purpose I think you are in a state of content.

[00:22:40] Justin: I think you are in a state of joy When you feel like you're truly making a difference when you feel like you're truly impacting somebody and I think you can only do so much for yourself. Yeah, you really can only do so much for yourself This is true. You have so much to give and I think of course you have to help yourself first, but you really have to give to [00:23:00] others Yeah, and I think it will be returned if you do you know one way or another it will be returned and I think a lot of people don't realize that because They're struggling so hard on trying to help themselves.

[00:23:10] Justin: Yeah, where you know, you have to to get over your own obstacles. You have to get through your own, hurdles and stuff like that before you can help other people and of course you can't really Give what you don't have. Yeah. Yeah. I think you have to find it first. You have to possess it first to help other people.

[00:23:27] Justin: So I guess doing little things is exactly what I would say. Just anything that you can in your own life to create those little moments that kind of have this momentum. But it also, it carries into something bigger when you can make it habitual. Yeah. When you can just keep doing it to the point of the.

[00:23:47] Justin: It's a bunch of little things, but then the momentum that it has is something much greater. Oh, yeah. Because it, starts forming different habits in your own life. It does. And I think you can only get to a state of happiness by changing your [00:24:00] habits. Yeah. I don't think, because if you haven't achieved happiness right now.

[00:24:03] Justin: Yeah. You know, habitually where you are. That's right. I think some things need to change. And I think that's the harsh reality for people is I can't just get happiness right where I'm at. And I think, I think you can in some cases, and it depends maybe on your perspective. It depends maybe how you look at things.

[00:24:20] Justin: It depends maybe how you look at that class, but when it comes to. And I think living in a world where, where we can just get whatever we want, whenever we want, we can get food delivered literally to our couch, essentially, you know, we just got to hang our arms out the front door and just snatch a bag off the ground.

[00:24:39] Justin: Easy as that. You know, in a world of convenience, you know, it makes it harder to achieve something that is not just easily convenient. You know, it's, it's hard to grasp something in a world of convenience. It's hard to understand that. It's gonna take some time. It's gonna take some change. It's [00:25:00] gonna take some work to get to a certain feeling.

[00:25:04] Justin: And a feeling that when you achieve it, maybe you can achieve it more frequently, and you can achieve it for an extensive period of time. But the world itself is almost twisting you and turning you in so many different ways. And it's causing you to just feel like you'll never even have a chance from the starting line.

[00:25:23] Don: Yeah, yeah, I know it's a rough world out there and, you know, to be able to have this one element in your life is powerful because, you know, a lot of times we enter into situations that are boring or it's It's, it's just not good. It's just not good. And, uh, you know, if we don't have the right attitude, if we don't have the happiness and joy in us, we're gonna be thinking bad stuff and all that.

[00:25:49] Don: I remember one time I was at a wedding, and there was free drinks. There was free drinks. And, um, the dinner was a little bit late, and people were standing around, you know, and all that. Well, I said [00:26:00] to myself, you know what? I am going to change the atmosphere to this whole thing. So I went up to everybody, and I asked them what they were drinking.

[00:26:09] Don: And they gave me their orders, and I went to the bar, and I got them their drink, and I brought them back the drink. You know, so by the time I got around all these people, everybody was sitting there, what's going on here? You know, I mean, it was free drinks at the bar, but I was taking the time to do all this sort of thing.

[00:26:23] Don: Change the atmosphere. You know, who was getting the greater joy? I mean, they were getting joy out of this whole thing. Yeah, I did it with a smile on my face, but I was getting tons of this stuff, I felt good for about two weeks after that, just by doing one thing. So a lot of times, you know, you have to step out of yourself and do things, just to bring happiness to somebody else, maybe visiting somebody or whatever it is.

[00:26:44] Don: Because as you bring this stuff, it comes back to you. And I know, like, I used to say a good compliment usually lasted me about a week, you know, but a lot of times when you do good things, this brings joy and happiness. And sometimes this thing lasts you for [00:27:00] weeks, cause you've developed something.

[00:27:01] Don: But when you don't do this stuff, if you don't, If it's all you care about is yourself, what happens is you've swiped an opportunity that God has given you. You swiped an opportunity for joy and happiness to enter into your life. A lot of people deal with depression, unhappiness and a lot of ugly things in life, all because they haven't got over themselves and to the point where they're willing to help and serve other people.

[00:27:27] Don: Because the moment, you know, as Justin was talking about, the moment we take that time, the moment we realize this, And take one effort in front of it, and doing this, and acknowledging God in our lives, things start to change. And He starts to pour a mega dose of everything we need in 

[00:27:44] Justin: life. I mean, that's so powerful what you're saying, Don.

[00:27:47] Justin: And I think it's definitely so powerful because it might take like That one kind of almost like life changing moment for you to ever achieve real happiness. I think some people go their [00:28:00] entire life and don't achieve real happiness. And I think that a lot of people, you know, if you want to talk about the world that we're living in, I think most people are afraid to try.

[00:28:11] Justin: Most people are even, they're afraid to even start, because they're afraid to fail. And the fear of failure keeps people stuck. And you're not going to achieve happiness, true happiness in your life, if you're fearing failure. You know, because failure is just holding everybody back in this world of comparison.

[00:28:34] Justin: And I think that, especially with the social media age, things are a lot different nowadays. in terms of comparison than maybe when you were growing up. The definition of happiness is probably different today than it was when you were growing up. And I think that the world of comparison really keeps people down.

[00:28:55] Justin: It keeps people from really going anywhere, because I can go on this person's profile [00:29:00] and see that they have this glamorous, great life, and I'm really only seeing a video, or I'm really only seeing a picture. But it's really showing me that I'm not doing what they're doing, and I'm not living as good as they're living.

[00:29:14] Justin: So therefore, Happiness is kind of something that I'm actually viewing from the outside. Happiness, I'm almost getting like a, like a glimpse of what happiness looks like. And it creates this, almost impossible level of standard in your perspective, in your mindset, because just be, just by witnessing this one person who took a picture, right, it can change your whole perspective now.

[00:29:40] Justin: And now it's, it seems almost unachievable to you. Because you're already comparing everything you're doing in your life to somebody 

[00:29:47] Don: else. I know yeah, I can make things pretty miserable I know, um a lot of what happiness does in a person's life Is what in regards to what justin's saying here it uh, it gives you contentment You learn to be [00:30:00] content with what you have and where you're at, and I know, uh, talking about different generations, I go back a little bit further than Justin does, but, uh, we learn to be content with very little, because I remember at Christmas You only got 40 years on me.

[00:30:14] Don: Yeah, we look at hey, you don't have to tell everybody. But, no, no, but I know when I was young, you know, which was 40 years ago, but, um, anyway, uh, no, I know at Christmas time, at Christmas time, for us, Christmas was maybe getting a pair of pajamas and maybe some pair of socks, and then we'd get one toy for the whole family.

[00:30:34] Don: There was six of us kids, so six of us had to share one toy. So today's day and age, as Justin is talking about, The society we live in right now, there is just so much stuff, for your children to be happy. I mean they go to this christmas. They go to amazon wishlist. I know they go from christmas party to christmas party by the time They're done.

[00:30:55] Don: They've got 20 30 presents to deal with. I don't know how they [00:31:00] you know, handle all that and then They sometimes walk away and they're still not happy, because it isn't in the things, it isn't in the things, you learn a contentment. You know, Paul says, I've learned to be content no matter what state I am, Paul in the Bible that is.

[00:31:15] Don: And also no matter whatever situation he was in, he learned to be content in that because that's where his joy was. If I'm not content in the things I have right now and the people around me and all this, I will be miserable and joy will not be a part of my life. I need to be 

[00:31:31] Justin: content. And we talk about the relationship to God, and you talk about in reference to Christmas.

[00:31:37] Justin: Yes. And you know, the kids being happy and there being kind of a polarity in the difference of receiving gifts and what kind of gifts were given. And, you know, the time period that you grew up versus today. I would also say it, when talking about the reference of that relationship to God, I would say that also plays a part in the way [00:32:00] Christmas is, uh, viewed today.

[00:32:02] Justin: And I think the way Christmas is not about God. Or so it seems, and it doesn't seem to have his involvement with God. You talk about the Christmas songs, joy to the world, the Lord has come. That's what joy meant when writing the song, when speaking of God and when speaking of what Christmas is really about and I think what we when we lose what Christmas is really about we can't achieve the joy because We're not announcing the joy of the 

[00:32:31] Don: world That's true.

[00:32:32] Don: That is true and I know the greatest gift mankind a lot of times is just the same wasn't recognized because the greatest gift was Jesus Christ and the whole concept of that is In giving which christmas is giving the concept is there but the understanding of the best gift we could have ever received Was jesus christ and what he wants to do in our lives Because he's given us an opportunity of a new birth and a [00:33:00] birth where we see things with contentment and happiness and joy in life Where we realize that this is just a temporary time that we're spending here on earth.

[00:33:08] Don: But he has a whole eternity in front of us. And that's where so many people expect everything. Everything has to happen right now. Their only happiness right now is, is doing something or people entertain themselves in different ways, you know. And they constantly go from entertainment to entertainment to try to For me, it's like a drug.

[00:33:28] Don: It's like a drug. They're trying to drug and numb themselves because of unhappiness and true joy. They don't know how to receive all that. And once we come to the understanding that this gift at Christmas, this gift of Jesus, is a true joy. It's a true joy in allowing ourselves to be a part of Him.

[00:33:46] Don: And, Uh, example he gave us gives us an opportunity to have something that will not only carry us through this life, but carry us right into Eternity. Yeah, and I 

[00:33:57] Justin: think that what we should often [00:34:00] do is what we should do is we should equate Doing good with feeling good and by doing good works We will feel good and I think a lot of the times what people are doing especially nowadays is they're equating just What gives them pleasure with what will make them happy.

[00:34:18] Justin: And they're expending all their uses of pleasure and it's not getting them to the level of happiness. And I think what that does is then it causes this this cycle of, um, suffering almost, because the expected outcome is never met and it's not giving you that end result that you're looking for.

[00:34:37] Justin: And then you start to go backwards. I think you start to go backwards because you realize. Going forwards isn't working anymore, and then you start to slip into, bad habits. You slip into addictions. Yeah, and if you've been in a new addiction, you slip into withdrawal, you slip into misery. Yes, and then it becomes this cycle.

[00:34:58] Justin: And I think that's one thing that's kind of [00:35:00] wrong with the world, is that we're just looking for constant pleasure. We're looking for pleasure in everything. And I think that we Need to come to the agreement that we can't just find pleasure in ourselves and we have to find it 

[00:35:15] Don: through God Yeah, yeah, that's true.

[00:35:17] Don: We need to bring God into our 

[00:35:19] Justin: life and with a new life with it with a rebirth you have the opportunity to do just 

[00:35:24] Don: that. That's true. And you know And it's something about this that what Justin's saying here is there's an element to this here that is so powerful and what happens is When you have this happiness and this joy, which we talked about We have smiles on our faces and it's interesting what smiles will do It builds relationships.

[00:35:48] Don: It builds the warmth I remember one time being in New York City, Manhattan, right downtown, and, I was walking downtown, we stopped by a jewelry store, and the guy looked at me, he says, you know, [00:36:00] he says, you gotta take it easy with that smile on your face, because, he says, in New York, you're either On something or after something with smiles like that on your face, and I said, I already found something I really did and it's interesting because in life, I myself, and this is just the tip.

[00:36:17] Don: If you want to get some joy working for you, start smiling, you know, start to find every day because Even in the household, with the family and stuff, there's nothing better than a smile. I remember one guy that came to work at Pierce Manufacturing, and the first day of work, he comes in with a big smile on his face.

[00:36:34] Don: Usually they're nervous, they're this and that, but this guy had a big grin on his face. He and I are good buddies. I seen him the other day, and it was almost brought tears to my eyes, because he had that. He had that, which is powerful. Yeah, and I 

[00:36:47] Justin: think it just makes people Want to approach you a little bit.

[00:36:50] Justin: It makes it easier to approach you. I mean if you smile and Just be at ease around them. Oh, yeah, and I think it's just those little things that make it seem [00:37:00] It almost seems like odd. It almost seems like strange But when you do it, it makes sense. That's right. Like it's hard to make sense of it because it's like, Oh, that just sounds dumb.

[00:37:10] Justin: I'm just going to walk around with a smile on my face. But yeah, like just doing that, just doing that alone. Just like we talked about last week, just opening the door for somebody that might seem strange. That might seem odd. That might seem dumb on its face. But when you do these little things, You start to get a good feeling from it.

[00:37:29] Justin: Oh yeah. That's what I'm saying, like, we almost need to equate doing good with feeling good. Yeah. Because as long as you do good, you will feel good. That's right. But, the phrase is what, fake it till you make it? And sometimes I think that does apply with smiling. You know, you'll just, if you just walk around with a smile, like you're saying, Yeah.

[00:37:48] Justin: you will naturally feel good. feel better. Yeah. Some people might look at you like you're a little off like that jeweler, but that guy's used to dealing with, uh, you know, people like you saying that are smiling for all different kinds of [00:38:00] reasons. And I mean, we're talking, we're talking Manhattan in New York.

[00:38:04] Justin: You know, you never know really what you're going to run into, I guess, in that area. So, and I think that's the underlying message here is that the happiness itself. Is maybe an end goal. Well, how are you gonna get there? Are you just gonna be upset right now that you're just not feeling happiness? Are you just gonna be, are you just gonna focus on all the things that are you know, making you, I guess on all the negative things?

[00:38:30] Justin: that are keeping you from feeling happiness? Are you just going to look at everybody else's life that seems to be in a good place and they seem to be in a state of happiness without wanting it for yourself? Are you going to make that change? Are you going to, you know, the Bible calls it repentance. Are you going to change your thinking?

[00:38:49] Justin: Are you going to change your perspective? Are you going to look maybe to a higher power to try to achieve this end goal? Because it has to be an end goal. I think that happiness is Like you were saying [00:39:00] before, Don, it's kind of, I like how you said this, it's just a, a moment of happening, you know? It's something that, it, it's, rather than look to it as just, something that's just joy or joyous, it's just a moment of happening, and I think, that's a good way to look at it too, is that, if we can achieve, contentment at all times.

[00:39:17] Justin: It is just a moment of 

[00:39:18] Don: happening. It is. It 

[00:39:20] Justin: is just something that comes and goes. And I think that's, that's something that people also need to accept too, is it is something that it does fluctuate, but it can also living in a state of contentment can be an end goal for you. You just have to have a plan.

[00:39:35] Don: Yes. Yes. And that's where I know, You, uh, hit on something a little bit before here, where you talked about, uh, it being a habit, smiling can become a habit. Because I remember when I was young, I didn't have nothing to smile about, at least I didn't think I did. You know, and I had walked around and, and I was kind of a bashful person to begin with, so I had a hard time with this.

[00:39:56] Don: But then I came to a place in life where, [00:40:00] I had different experiences in life. You know, being lifted up by God and all that. But all of a sudden, smiles became a part of me. So now, it's a habit. I mean, I, I smile at most everybody. , and a lot of times I'll be sitting at a stop and go light.

[00:40:14] Don: And I'll look over and the person in the next car is smiling at me. And I'm looking and saying, why are they smiling at me? Then I realize that I was smiling. Cause I don't even realize I'm smiling sometimes. And that's where I, I'm going to be looking, for people out there that possibly have listened to what we've done here today.

[00:40:29] Don: And I am going to be looking for smiles. So the next time I see somebody smile, I'm going to be thinking maybe they will listen to this podcast. Maybe this happiness is a part of their 

[00:40:39] Justin: life. Yeah. We hope we can bring a smile to your face. And I mean, that's, that's the ultimate goal right now is , if you're not smiling right now to get 

[00:40:46] Don: you to smile.

[00:40:47] Don: Yeah. Justin's smiling right now. And to hold, and 

[00:40:50] Justin: to hold that smile. I definitely am. And I think it, It might seem a little odd at first, but everything seems odd to you that's not already a habit of [00:41:00] yours. Yeah, it takes change. It takes just making a decision. It takes saying, you know what? I don't want to do things exactly the way I've been doing them before because the end result is always the same.

[00:41:14] Justin: And I'm just trying the same things and getting the same result. So it takes a certain level of change. It takes a change in your habits, in your perspective, in your spiritual life. I think it takes a change in your, your spiritual relationship with God. I think because if you know that God wants you to be happy, then the best way for you to achieve that is by allowing Him to do it for you.

[00:41:39] Justin: Allowing Him at least to participate in it with you. 

[00:41:42] Don: It'll be a part of all that, and that's what we're going to be praying. For all of you guys that you can have joy and happiness that God will fill your life with the beauty of life Because it's a whole lot better and easier living that type of life than to live the life in unhappiness And depression [00:42:00] and all the things that come along with bitterness as Justin mentioned earlier God wants the good things in your life And I know happiness is part of the package and 

[00:42:10] Justin: the package is the key word there and I I often like to say this, is that the present itself, the present, when you think about the word present, right?

[00:42:21] Justin: When you really want to focus on the present, it can, you know, be a time period, it can be, , state that we're in right now. It can mean, you know, the package of present at a gift. And I think that the word present is so important to focus on, especially in, our current time period and month that we're in.

[00:42:40] Justin: But the word present is so important because everything happens, everything changes in the present. And it's, the reason I think it is called this, I like to say this, is it's called a present because it's a gift from God for [00:43:00] opportunity. All of the opportunity happens right now. It does. It's all in the present and it's his gift to you.

[00:43:08] Justin: So if you want happiness, focus on the present and accept the 

[00:43:12] Don: gift. That's true, because I know that, in what Justin's saying there, because it is all about the now and it is about the present, because a minute ago was the past, a minute beyond this. Is the future. So, what do we have? We have And you're not gonna find 

[00:43:28] Justin: happiness focusing and living in the past.

[00:43:32] Justin: And you're not gonna find happiness just always worrying about the future and focusing 

[00:43:37] Don: on the future. That's right. So we gotta focus on the present and we have to focus right now. And we have to realize That we are the only ones accountable for our own joy and happiness. If we are looking for other people to give us that, we are in trouble.

[00:43:54] Don: Accountability is a whole other topic. I know, that's a hard one, man. That's tough. [00:44:00]

[00:44:00] Justin: Well, I think that wraps it up for 

[00:44:02] Don: today. This was a good one, Justin. I think so 

[00:44:05] Justin: too. Hey, we're glad you guys found your way here today. And we hope you can join us again next week for another good word. Until then, stay blessed

[00:44:15] Don: by the best.

[00:44:17] Justin: See you guys.