Finding Your Confidence - Episode 10

Many people are wandering and lost - looking to find something in their path that will help them make sense of their past and their present.

Deep down, they know what they are capable of, but they just can't seem to act on it.  They just can't seem to go all in on it.  There's something that is holding them back. 

In this episode, we are going to help the lost find what they have been missing.  To realize that the search is not external but is actually internal -- what you're searching for is already inside of you, and you just need to bring it out.

Are you ready to finally find confidence in yourself? 

Transcript

[00:00:00] Justin: Hi everyone, this is Justin Olbrantz 

[00:00:08] Don: and this is Don Schaefer, and you 

[00:00:11] Justin: are listening to the wise and the wandering podcast for those who know the way. And for those who are led astray. And if you feel like you fall into either of those categories, then you're in the right place. 

[00:00:25] Don: So let's dive in.

[00:00:31] Justin: Don, what are we going to talk about today? 

[00:00:34] Don: Well, I think the topic we're planning on talking about here is called finding your confidence, which is a good one. Yeah, this should be a good one because I think this is an area that everybody has to find in their life and a lot of people struggle with it and a lot of people are born into this world with no confidence at all and we have to find this as we get to Grow in life.

[00:00:57] Don: And a lot of times we do not, [00:01:00] we struggle with that and we have a lack of confidence in all the things we do. And that's where I'm hoping today. We'll have an opportunity to talk a little bit about confidence, where it comes from, how to develop it and help everybody be much more profitable in life, because we all need confidence in some way.

[00:01:19] Justin: Yes, we do. And I think that's exactly what we're going to do today. And I think that confidence is something that, you know, we talk about the wandering, right? We talk about the lost, something you have to find. If you don't have it already, you're kind of lost without it. And it's something that you do have to acquire, something that you do have to find.

[00:01:37] Justin: I don't think it's just completely natural. And I think In some cases, it might be natural, but you still have to find it. Right. You still have to look within yourself. You still have to look deeper. You still have to maybe have different perspectives on things to be able to find it. I guess I just want to start here and I pulled up the definition.

[00:01:56] Justin: In the Merriam Webster dictionary, right? The [00:02:00] most modern definition for confidence, and it says the definition is the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something. Also firm trust, right? So it's a feeling, but it's also a belief. So when finding confidence, you have to find something to believe in.

[00:02:20] Justin: You have to find something to trust in. You know, you really have to have, something there that is, I would say, grounded and rooted in good principle. Otherwise, it has to be rooted you know in good principle because if it's not it's gonna lose your trust Yeah, right, you know, how many times have you said in your life that I'm confident that this is going to happen?

[00:02:41] Justin: I'm confident like that tomorrow. This is gonna happen or I'm gonna get this or this outcome is going to happen for me, or it's going to go this way, and then it didn't go that way, right? And when it didn't, you lose trust. You start to lose trust, and I think over time, once that [00:03:00]trust erodes, you start to lose confidence.

[00:03:02] Don: Yep, that's true. You know, and that's where I know like confidence is an element of a person's life. , we have so many parts going on, you know, we're born into this world. There's so many areas in our life that have to be complete in some way or some fashion, or we're not successful in life. And sometimes people get caught in a trap of lack of self confidence.

[00:03:22] Don: , they don't have confidence in themselves because like you're saying, Justin, they, a lot of times don't have something to believe in. The only thing they have to believe is themselves. And if they fail at anything, all of a sudden it falls apart for them, you know, and that's where it is a belief system of , believing in yourself, but believing that there is , an outer source that, , will work with you, that will help you develop this confidence.

[00:03:47] Don: And I know for myself, you know, I look at life this way a little bit. I look at, you know, a child being born in this world. And the child has to develop confidence in a lot of areas has has to learn how to stand falls a [00:04:00] lot of times But he learns how to stand but he continues to developing confidence pretty soon.

[00:04:05] Don: He's walking pretty soon He's running right, you know, and if the parents are doing a proper job, they're helping him develop a confidence in himself. And what happens a lot of times in life is as a person gets older, they don't have the encouragement. They don't have the sources to help them develop a good, solid confidence.

[00:04:24] Don: So the self doubt there's doubt all their life. And all the possibilities of life that has to happen. A lot of it, and most of it, takes some sort of confidence in some way or fashion. You know, every big move people take, you know, there's always doubt. I remember one time, I purchased a property, cause we fixed up properties.

[00:04:44] Don: I purchased a property, and I'm sitting there that night, after I signed the paperwork, after it was an accepted offer saying, Man, what did I just do? You know and but you know, I went through and because I Basically threw my hat over the wall and [00:05:00] I signed that paper. It was mine So I had to build a confidence, but once I got done with that property I had lots of confidence, you know, because I stepped it through and I stepped out and that's where I think a lot of people in life, the areas that they, they find themselves trapped in because they just don't have the confidence.

[00:05:18] Don: You have to step it out and work it out to develop that confidence or you'll never gain that. And the beauty of confidence is once you develop it in one area. You can apply it in all areas of your life, wherever there's a fear, wherever there's a doubt, all this sort of thing, you know, you go back to the formula that you've worked with, you know, just as a child, you always got up until you learn how to walk in and sit there on the floor for the rest of your life, you develop the confidence in your walking ability, and I think we as adults need to go through some of those same principles to be able to learn how to walk the way we should and have the confidence in life, because there is a whole world [00:06:00] in front of us.

[00:06:00] Don: We were created for greatness and a lot of times because of lack of confidence. We don't walk in it 

[00:06:07] Justin: Yeah, and I think you mentioned something there. Let's just go back to what you said about the source, right? We have to go back to the source and it's been a common theme in this podcast is going to the source Yes going to the source and it's so important because you got it.

[00:06:23] Justin: Everything has to start with God Yes, it does because we have God given Natural confidence. And the world wants to replace that with man given doubt. Yeah. And control systems. Right? You talk about that doubt that creeps in, that doubt that sets in. Yeah. And then it really stops you, it keeps pulling you back.

[00:06:46] Justin: And we go back. To the definition I was, I was talking about it, something that you have to place your trust in. Well, if you keep placing your trust in the wrong things, your confidence is going to diminish over time because you kept [00:07:00] placing your trust in places where , it wasn't producing anything back.

[00:07:03] Justin: You weren't getting a return back from, you weren't seeing a result. Um. Or it wasn't, you know, it wasn't helping you and it was, maybe it was sabotaging you, whatever the case was. That trust, , once you lose that trust, it makes it harder. Like you're saying, the fear sets in, not only just the doubt, the fear sets in, but then there's certain things that stop you from being able to get that confidence.

[00:07:29] Justin: It's hard to even have faith when you start losing trust. in life in general, because then the insecurities start coming up. Then that inner voice in your head starts telling you, , and we could even call this the enemy starts telling you rejected and stuff like that. And nobody wants to be around you.

[00:07:48] Justin: It's all about the source, right? And if you are right with God, you will be confident. Yeah, I think so. And you will be confident , because of that, you'll be confident [00:08:00]in who he has called you to be. Yeah. Because If you're confident about , who He has called you to be, then you can love yourself.

[00:08:12] Justin: A lot of the times, I think, it starts with love. We talk about this, but even getting to that confidence level, you have to love yourself. And we talked in previous episodes about, oh, you have to learn to love yourself before you can love people. And that's true, but confidence is kind of like the tip of the spear, and you really In order to get there, there's going to be a certain level of love, but once you can love yourself, you're then confident in your purpose.

[00:08:37] Justin: And when you're confident in your purpose, you can become 

[00:08:40] Don: unstoppable. Oh, yes. Yeah, that's so true. So true there, Justin, because I know, , once you connect into a purpose, connect to the source and know exactly what your purpose is in life, then you can place all your confidence because, you know, the Bible says that he is the source, he's the helper, he's our helpmate, takes care of [00:09:00] and directing us all that.

[00:09:01] Don: But I know, , a lot of times what I see In lack of self confidence you can it's it shows itself, you know There's signs and that one thing is, you know, you want to do something. You just can't get yourself to do it. Yeah Some people what they do is they medicate themselves because of lack of confidence You know a lot of people that a lot of addictions a lot of this sort, you know It's people with a lack of confidence in their life To be able to really do and establish themselves, so they fall into a lot of different traps, ways of just appeasing time, you know, I know people sometimes they get into, I'll just throw this out there, but you know, they get into novels, there's nothing wrong with novels, but a lot of times what happens in life, you find in novels.

[00:09:46] Don: Novels, yes. Okay. You know, they get into that sort of thing. A lot of times what happens in life, people are looking for a place to escape, because they haven't got the confidence to step out and become the person they really were meant to be. So [00:10:00] they find themselves plugging themselves into various sorts of stuff, you know, so that their mind can get off of the fact that they are lacking confidence.

[00:10:09] Don: And, uh, and if we can Grab that one element, because I know myself, I look for people, it seems like the whole world is looking for people with confidence. You know, you look at leadership and all this, you're looking for someone who is confident about who they are and what they are and what they were meant to be doing.

[00:10:27] Don: And myself, When I talk to people, I can sense in their voice sometimes confidence in themselves. And I love that. You know, I love being able to do that because I know they're confident in what they're doing. It isn't something that, um, they're walking around doubting themselves and they don't know if this is right or that's right.

[00:10:44] Don: They know. They know. And as you were saying, Justin, I think God is meant to be a part of that in our life. He's given us this element that we need, but the source of getting that need is in Him. You know, He wants to be the source. He wants to fill [00:11:00] us with an understanding. And I know the Bible talks a little bit about the fact about not worrying about tomorrow.

[00:11:06] Don: So many people are so worried. You know, the fact is I just seen a little thing on the news where people are making all these, , these safe places and little huts and whatever. So if the world crashes, and they were saying Inside of them, they've got plenty of movies and plenty of books, plenty of entertainment.

[00:11:23] Don: So they can get their mind off of things. But they can get themselves in a place where the whole world can fall apart, but they got their place to go. You know, the Bible tells us that we don't worry about tomorrow. So don't be anxious. Tomorrow will worry about itself. It'll worry about itself, you know.

[00:11:38] Don: But we get ourselves all twisted up. And , we lack confidence in the fact that He is the one that's gonna, He's the one that created us. He's the one that's gonna take care of Every element in our life. 

[00:11:49] Justin: Yes, and I would even say the in the bible it says that He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.

[00:11:57] Justin: Yes. And because he's inside of [00:12:00] you, , the spirit that came here, that lived in Jesus, right? The spirit, the Holy Spirit. Could be inside of you is inside of you if you believe if you're willing to believe and that confidence Is a supernatural confidence then right because you talk about addictions and stuff like that And that's so true those things these like artificial barriers that get in the way from people even having their confidence it really stops them.

[00:12:29] Justin: And I can even speak on this myself. It, it's, it's really hard to get away from , those crutches and those addictions and even like the trauma and stuff like that because your past experiences alone can have an impact and a large influence on your ability to face new experiences with confidence.

[00:12:52] Justin: And, and that's what You know, we were talking about before with the trust that erodes and stuff like that People just go through different [00:13:00] relationships over and over and over again And keep getting keep getting played or cheated on or whatever the case where it just keeps ending in heartbreak they We'll slowly lose confidence over time, right?

[00:13:14] Justin: They lose confidence in themselves and I think what happens is then they start falling into worse Relationships because when they don't have confidence in themselves, they think the behavior that they're getting from somebody is justified Yeah, maybe they're not worthy anymore. Maybe they don't deserve the best anymore like they did Nine relationships ago or two relationships ago.

[00:13:37] Justin: But really their confidence level is low and they start to see, they start to settle, but it starts to kind of go backwards. It's maybe it falls, maybe, you know, people fall into a depression, but I'm just saying in terms of what they accept, the behavior they accept from other people and the way they allow other people to treat them, they feel justified because their confidence level is low.

[00:13:59] Justin: They [00:14:00] don't, they don't know. What they deserve. Because when you're, when you're confident in your abilities, when you're confident in your skill, when you're confident in what you have to offer, you're not going to settle. You're going to go out there and you're going to strive for the best.

[00:14:14] Justin: Because you're going to be the best. And you only want to be around, you only want to be associated with people who are also confident in themselves. And I think a lot of the times, it's really hard to do that by yourself. You need to have, You need to have God in your life. You need to have God as the center driving force for your confidence.

[00:14:34] Justin: That's right. Because I, I truly believe this. You know, a lot of the times , Your confidence is what's going to get you over that addiction. Your confidence, and just, and finding a reason to do something, and knowing you have it in you, and He that's in you, that's greater than the world, that's what's gonna get you past that trauma.

[00:14:54] Justin: Oh yeah. And even just like creating things, that's what's going to get you to write that book, that confidence. [00:15:00] That's what's going to get you to write that song, right? That's what's going to get you to create that project and start it, is that confidence. Like we're saying you find it when you go to the source.

[00:15:13] Justin: Mm hmm. 

[00:15:14] Don: That's right. And a lot of times what you're saying too is, , you know, the nine relationships and all that that have fallen apart, you know, sometimes what happens to a person is they develop a loser's attitude or they become victims, you know, or percent. And so many times in those situations, they're constantly blaming, , their environment.

[00:15:34] Don: And everything around them for their issues and stuff they're dealing with without realizing it could be just all a lack of confidence in themselves. And it's, it's true, you know, being around people with that lack of confidence in themselves is sometimes hard. It rubs off on you too. Oh yeah, and that's right.

[00:15:53] Don: So you have to be careful with Who you associate or what you associate with because there are confidence [00:16:00] builders and then you look at teams. You look at sports teams You know, you can take a team that's way ahead by halftime if they lose their confidence in the second half They could easily we've seen Super Bowls where there's been a 20 point swing in a game just because of confidence Just one element You know, a lot of times, uh, teams will get people that can just talk confidence, speak things into their players, because it's all a mind game.

[00:16:27] Don: You know, we get our mind thinking the way it needs to think. We can have confidence in who we are and what we are, and, uh, to realize that God has created all of us with greatness in mind, it's a matter of us finding the confidence to fulfill the dream that we might have. Like you're talking about writing a book in which I'm looking at myself in different areas and yeah, that one's resonating that is resonating Yes, it is But you know and it all takes confidence and I know myself and the things that I do The more I do it the more confidence [00:17:00] I gain in that and I know There was a time I can share this with you Justin.

[00:17:06] Don: There was a time that I struggled, you know Just talking in front of people You know, I remember, , I cannot imagine that I did I did because I remember in school They'd have you give a little speech, you know And I remember I had the same speech through grade school going into high school It was it was one topic of one speech and I had a hard time talking with people but when you get there talking with people after a period of time and then there's an element like you you brought up earlier Justin about love You know, uh, the Bible says, uh, a perfect love casts out all fear, you know, so all of a sudden when you start to love the individuals, you step out.

[00:17:43] Don: I know myself to find confidence in different areas, I start to say to myself, who can I help by doing this? You know, what type of love do I have to have inside me, Lord, to help me want to do this? Because you see purpose in it. Yeah, and I step out in it, all of a sudden I developed a confidence. I started saying, this is [00:18:00] working, it really is.

[00:18:01] Don: You know, because I've developed a confidence. And then you feel so much better inside. Because I know, um, I, and if I can get back a little bit here, I know Jesus himself. You know, when he preached the message when he was on earth, he developed and instilled confidence in these people. He went to the poor and the downtrodden, and all of a sudden, they had confidence.

[00:18:22] Don: You know, and, and the elites at that time, the religious type world at that time, they didn't like that. They were losing control of the people, because these people were starting to realize that, Hey, you know what? I can do this stuff. You know, I have abilities inside me, you know, I just need to be confident enough to develop all this and that's where Jesus was Excellent example in simple ways.

[00:18:46] Don: He he expressed this message that Everyone is valuable in some way or fashion and a lot of times Thing that stops people is just a lack of confidence. And I, I believe when [00:19:00] Jesus talks about putting his grace upon us, it's a lot of confidence he's instilling inside of us. And realizing, you know, what's important in life?

[00:19:08] Don: I mean, life doesn't last forever. So what is it going to hurt if I step out and maybe Fail at something. Is that going to destroy my confidence? No. I'm just going to try to, as you had mentioned earlier, find an excellence in what I do and try to perfect what I'm doing because I'm confident in who I am.

[00:19:27] Don: And you can tell people who are confident in their own skin. You know, and I love people because I can, they come up and they talk and whatever I say. You know, this person is really confident in their own skin. They don't And they 

[00:19:38] Justin: speak a message of positivity. They don't, they don't speak like negativity.

[00:19:42] Justin: No, no. You don't get that vibe from them, from confident people when you're around 

[00:19:47] Don: confident people. Oh, yeah. It's an easy listen. Yeah. It's an easy listen to these types of people. Some people are hard listens. Yeah. Because they're always finding something to complain about. They're always talking down about something, [00:20:00] you know, everything is miserable, all this, you know, a lot of it is lack of confidence, lack of confidence, lack of confidence, but it disguises itself in different ways.

[00:20:08] Don: Yes. Because 

[00:20:09] Justin: not only is it the trust, but it's the belief itself, the belief itself. And, you know, when you're talking down to yourself, when you're not saying good things to yourself, when you're not thinking good thoughts to yourself, and when you're talking down about yourself to people, I hear this all the time when people just say, Oh, I'm just an idiot or I'm just angry, or I'm just, I'm just this, or.

[00:20:35] Justin: That's just the way I am, you know, that's just the way I am. And that's not something you want to say to yourself because when you do that, you, in that moment, you come into agreement with it. Right. And it makes it harder to, , break out of that, that, negativity that you allow yourself to be around.

[00:20:52] Justin: Oh, yeah. Because It's all about the belief system. I really believe that. It's all about the belief. If you think, if you believe, you're confident, and [00:21:00] you have a reason to stand behind it, you could be unstoppable. If you find a reason, there's going to be nothing that stops you. You'll be confident. Like you say, um, the experience and stuff like that, I think definitely helps, um, getting that experience.

[00:21:14] Justin: You know, like talking to people and stuff like that, I think that one's a lot harder because you have to have the experience to start to, to develop that confidence. Cause then you start realizing, I think it's not as bad as you thought it was. And then when you can start helping people, it's no longer about just talking in front of people, it's helping people.

[00:21:34] Justin: You're going in with a mission, you're going in with an objective. Like I know it's not about me anymore. It's about helping people. It's about them. So it doesn't really matter if I have confidence or not. I'm going to get my message across. And I'm going to get through to somebody and I'm going to help them.

[00:21:50] Justin: Um, and it's kind of like a multifaceted word. With confidence in God. Right? We talk about confidence in God. [00:22:00] There has to be a sense of boldness there. , there's a boldness in your belief that is dependent on the realization of your acceptance by God.

[00:22:13] Justin: Yeah. You know, that adoption process or whatever we call it, you know, when, when you know you're accepted, when you know you're not rejected and when you know that. When you have the conviction that your destiny is secure in God, yeah, man, that's when you're, you're no longer lost. That's when, for me, for example, that's when I knew I was no longer lost.

[00:22:36] Justin: I was found when I had that conviction that I got the victory already, no matter what it is you're talking about before in the Bible, or it says, you know, tomorrow will worry about itself. Like, that's true, but no matter what, if you, if you keep your eyes on God and you fix that focus, you know, fix that focus, , you already have the victory.

[00:22:55] Justin: You know, He'll go before you in all your problems. You can leave it up to Him. [00:23:00] And that right there is confidence. I mean that everything is going to work itself out no matter what of course I still got to put in the work and I still have to you know be a good person and I have to help people and want to Do things that I think would would please god because it's having a relationship with god But knowing that I have that strong relationship and that foundation it's guaranteed to give you 

[00:23:21] Don: confidence.

[00:23:22] Don: That's right Yeah, it will. And that's a good thing that we work that way, you know, developing our confidence because I know for many people, it starts early on. It starts with their parents sometimes, you know, uh, saying, you know, be realistic, get your head out of the clouds. Don't be just a dreamer. I mean, young children, they think about all this stuff.

[00:23:43] Don: And a lot of times their parents are trying to keep them at a level where they don't develop a confidence rather than encourage them. But this isn't an excuse. This is, you know, just life itself. You know, because if I was raised that way, I have a tendency to raise my kids that way. But I [00:24:00] need to put an end to it and say, Hey, you know what?

[00:24:02] Don: I am going to encourage my children to expand themselves. I'm gonna encourage myself. And that's where, like what you were saying a little bit here, Justin, our self self-talk, what we say to ourselves. Mm-Hmm. , you know, I mean. It's going to be a good day. You know, I'm going to succeed. It's going to be, I am healthy, you know, I'm going to learn things today.

[00:24:21] Don: I'm going to be positive today. I'm going to have a great attitude. I know I used to work, , at a plant and the guy was, the plant manager and he'd always come in and say, you know, Mr. Schaefer, it's going to be a good day. And I, I'd say, yes, Devin, it's going to be a good day, you know, but he'd do this.

[00:24:37] Don: Every day, you know, and I'm sitting there. This is powerful. It really is because you set an attitude of confidence around you so you can blossom in these areas rather than letting yourself being beat down. And I remember one time. I got a few stories here, but I remember one time in Utah, I was in Utah, and I ran across a guy, Mr.

[00:24:57] Don: Jones, and, , he asked me how I was [00:25:00] doing, and I told him, I says, I think I'm doing pretty good, but it's my, my opinion, and he says, Mr. Schaefer, he says, you don't think anything, you know, he says, you don't think, think has got too much doubt in it, you know, so you don't think it, you know, it, you are doing good.

[00:25:16] Don: I said, Whoa, because he was saying that so many times we speak doubt in our conversations, you know, and , we speak lack of confidence in this stuff. , I hope I can do this, you know, if this works, maybe it'll be for me, you know, but, but we, we speak is speaking, don't say, you know what? If I'm going to, I'm going to sit down and really think this through and maybe I'll make it in small parts, but, , tomorrow I am confident that I'm going to be doing this and I'm going to do it.

[00:25:44] Don: And just, just do it. I'm confident in myself. And then what happens is you develop yourself step by step. Your level of confidence goes up and up, just like the child learning how to walk. Pretty soon you're running. Pretty soon you've got momentum in your life. And you have a whole [00:26:00] vocabulary, whole way of looking at confidence.

[00:26:02] Don: And, As Justin, you were mentioning earlier, you become unstoppable. I mean, who's gonna Or you 

[00:26:07] Justin: trip, you fall, but you get back 

[00:26:08] Don: up, and you keep going. Yeah, you brush yourself off, nothing's gonna destroy you from what you're going after, and the confidence you carry, , and that's where It's a beautiful thing to see, lack of confidence, you can have empathy with that, I feel sorry for people.

[00:26:25] Don: You can see it in people sometimes, because I myself, I like looking into faces and I like smiling, you know, and I like greeting people and stuff. But some people have a hard time even looking you in the face. You know, you walk by them and they're looking down, looking the other way, or they pick their phone up.

[00:26:40] Don: Yeah. It always gets me. Right when the phone comes out and they start looking at their phone, rather than have any eye contact, it tells me there's a lack of confidence there, you know, and, and they're possibly trapped. They're trapped into something that, maybe a word or two can help them realize what is happening here, you know, and [00:27:00] not to let a life go by.

[00:27:01] Don: How many people are laid to rest? With lack of confidence, you know, and that could have been should have been would have been if they could have only got some Confidence in their life and that's where it myself I'm always trying to be around people that are confident trying to read things that help build my confidence Trying to listen to things that are from confident people realizing getting into I can type attitude rather than I can't Type attitude realizing the world is before me.

[00:27:31] Don: If somebody did it, I can do it. If they, if people put shoes on the same way I, I put shoes on, well, then I should be able to do almost the same thing they can. You know what I mean? They, they put their britches up the same way I do. And you talk 

[00:27:44] Justin: about vocabulary and I think the word failure, that word really sets people back.

[00:27:48] Justin: And I think fail, it has to, you got to get to a point where you have to believe and you have to know. Like you were saying, that guy was telling you, you don't just think, you know. You have to believe, you have to know [00:28:00] that you can't fail. Yeah, I was careful talking to him. You can't fail. You can't fail.

[00:28:05] Justin: Every, and if you're failing or whatever you're perceiving as failure is just a learning opportunity. It just means you haven't succeeded yet. That's right. And you have to go in with that mindset because that confidence right there, if you know and you believe that you can't fail, you won't fail.

[00:28:22] Justin: Because you can't believe in it. It's not possible to you. So therefore there's always an opportunity. There's always going to be time for you to be able to succeed in whatever it is. Right. But, but you have to start, like you said, there is, there's a list of steps, I would say, , that kind of lay out a process in terms of getting people,, getting associated with people who are in the right mindset surrounding yourself, you know, maybe like the affirmations of the day or something.

[00:28:50] Justin: I'll tell you, before I started this podcast, I wrote a note down at my, , uh, home office desk . I wrote down a note and it said to help [00:29:00] people find their gift and fulfill their purpose. And that was my note. I mean, very broad. I was just like, that's what I want to do.

[00:29:08] Justin: And I feel like, I mean, with this podcast, that's essentially what we're doing. That's right. At least that's what I'm going to, that's what I'm doing. Yeah. And I can't. Same 

[00:29:16] Don: here. 

[00:29:17] Justin: Yeah, and I can't fail at it. I can't fail. I'm going to help you find your gift. I'm going to help you fulfill your purpose, and there's going to be nothing that stops me or gets in the way.

[00:29:26] Justin: There's things that have tried to stop me and have tried to get in my way, but it's not going to. No. Because I have confidence. Yeah. And I want, people that are listening to this to have that same kind of confidence. Because you can. You can. Just like you believe in anything else in your life, you can believe in this.

[00:29:42] Justin: And it'll manifest itself, or it'll work its way. It'll happen. Because you, You got to change your mindset. You got to change some other aspects of your life, but you got to really put your focus on the right things. And I think you got to put your focus on Jesus. Yeah, I really do. Because [00:30:00] Jesus is going to get you through anything.

[00:30:02] Justin: Just like when Jesus was here, like you were saying, he was speaking confidence to people. He was giving them the ability to get through situations that they never thought they could do on their own. He was. Taking people that have been, um, that, that, that were ill or people that had diseases for many, many years and were told they were never, ever going to be healed and healing them on the spot instantly because they believed because they came into agreement and probably because they had that 

[00:30:32] Don: confidence.

[00:30:33] Don: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he did have a message that developed a confidence and people would trust in him seeking that because you know, there's an element to that comes with confidence. You start to achieve joy and peace with yourself. You know, you're comfortable with yourself. I know the Bible talks about a piece that surpasses all understanding and every one of us was created with a purpose in mind and God is wanting more than we [00:31:00] do to see us fulfill.

[00:31:01] Don: feel our purpose. And he's wanting more than 

[00:31:04] Justin: we do. I would even say that that's true. And to add to that, God has more interest in you than you have in 

[00:31:10] Don: yourself. Oh yeah, definitely. So, and he's wanting the more out of us than we could ever want of ourselves. Cause you look at, if you look at the whole picture, , you look at the creator, he's the creator of each and every one of us.

[00:31:23] Don: So, I mean, we are his design. That's why I tell people, it doesn't matter what size, shape, color. color, whatever a person is, you were designed on purpose for a purpose. And God is wanting you to achieve that. And that's where what we're speaking to today is an element that tries to stop this, which is a lack of confidence, you know, and if we can get ourselves to the place to realize how important we are just where we're at, just with the circumstance around us and develop an understanding that we need to trust in.

[00:31:56] Don: As you're saying, Jesus Christ, He says, I want to be your help mate. I want [00:32:00] to help you trust in all things. I will take care, cast your cares upon me because I care about you. He is wanting you to fulfill his purpose. And this was the message he was talking about when he was on earth. But this is the message for today yet too.

[00:32:15] Don: You know, it's the same thing. You know, we might be in 20, 24, 20, whatever year we're talking here. I mean, you go back 2, 000 years ago, you go back 4, 000 years ago, it was the same type of message, it was the same type of element they had to have. It talks about Abraham, walk by faith. His faith was considered as righteousness or the right thing to do.

[00:32:38] Don: And that's where ourselves, we have to develop a faith, you know, in ourselves. A faith in the resources that are out there, that we have a Creator that is going to give us everything that we need, you know, and the beauty of it, He does it in a perfect way. It isn't like He forces us. He gives us a free will.

[00:32:57] Don: But what we have to do is take this [00:33:00] free will and basically put it into His hands, you know. Not my will, but His. And then we can have that peace. We can have that joy. We can, we can live a great life. You know, life can be good because we realize this is just a temporary process we're in. But this is our time.

[00:33:22] Don: This is as my dad used to say, it's time to make hay. He says, when it's hot, it's time to make hay. It's time to make hay, you know, so sometimes when I come across a hot message, I say, it's time to make hay. You know, it's time to grab onto this stuff and say, you know what, I am going to take the elements I need and realize, because sometimes we live a life and we don't realize what we're lacking.

[00:33:43] Don: I tell people a lot of times they're one principle away from being successful. They've got everything lined up. Finances, whatever it might be, but they're just not successful. And sometimes it's just one element that is needed in today's topic. As far as confidence concern for some [00:34:00]people, for a lot of people, that is an element that is greatly needed.

[00:34:03] Don: It's greatly lacking because we will never fulfill ourselves and our happiness, our joy, or his plan. Unless we develop the confidence to be able to walk in all that. 

[00:34:14] Justin: Yeah, that's so important because I mean, you're talking about going back thousands of years and stuff like that and the message hasn't changed and it hasn't and I think, you know, when I speak about focusing, keeping your eyes fixed on Jesus, right?

[00:34:29] Justin: That's a metaphorical concept as well. It's not just the person of Jesus, but it's, it's the message that Jesus stood for. So when he said, I am the way, the truth and the life, right? Well, he's the life and he's the way that's both of those are going to give you confidence, but also the truth. And A hard thing to have in somebody's life is the truth.

[00:34:51] Justin: It's hard to find the truth. And I think that in order to be confident, you have to be truthful in your life. You have to be [00:35:00] honest. You can't be lying to people. And you also can't be lying to yourself. Because then what happens is you end up being hard on yourself. Because you're not being honest with yourself.

[00:35:10] Justin: And you're believing lies. And you're telling yourself lies. And that's why you're not getting that confidence. Because you're not focusing on the truth. The truth, the way, and the life. The truth is just as important as the other two. But you really have to surround yourself with the truth in your life.

[00:35:27] Justin: You do. You really have to be, you really have to be honest. Um, you really have to, get the deception out of your life. Yeah. Because deception, I mean, just lying to yourself and lying to people, that deception is, is like a cancer. It'll consume you. It really can. And that'll That'll suck the confidence out of your life and keep you from ever even having confidence.

[00:35:49] Justin: The more that cancer develops in your life, the more that you allow that deception to carry on. So you got to get out, you got to get all of that out of your life. It's completely [00:36:00]toxic. And focus on what's important. Focus on that message that hasn't changed for thousands of years. That's a good thing about Jesus's teachings is.

[00:36:08] Justin: I mean, you listen to these parables and stuff that he told to these people, and , it's just amazing. I mean, the way he was able to break things like real world events or just, just break down culture into stories that his audience would be able to understand and in a way that no one's done before.

[00:36:28] Justin: And I think because of that. And the teachings will be timeless. I mean, that word will never go away. The word of God will never go away, but all those teachings, all those things that Jesus did while he was here, that's why it's important to focus on him. It's important to focus on God and that'll help you, That'll help you, I would say, beat your own problems, so then you can help other people to focus and beat their own problems as well.

[00:36:55] Justin: Like I said, my goal was to help people find their gift and fulfill their [00:37:00]purpose. Well, guess what? I had to do that myself first. I can't do that. If I don't have confidence, I can't do that. If I don't help myself, if I don't know I have a gift, if I don't know I have a purpose, how am I going to help you find yours?

[00:37:11] Justin: Right? So it all starts with yourself, it all starts with going to the source and then, you know, taking 

[00:37:17] Don: it from there. Yeah. This is true. This is so true, Justin. If you don't mind, I'm going to share one of Jesus's story and I know he tells stories better than I do. Oh, I definitely don't mind. But , I know Jesus had a story, he talked about the pearl of great price, you know, and how, uh, they've, found a pearl of great price and the person that found it went back and sold everything he had so he could purchase this pearl and he likened it unto the kingdom or the things of God or any part of a person's life.

[00:37:48] Don: See, there's things in life that are very valuable and what are you going to give up for them? Are you gonna give up your doubt? Are you gonna give up your lack of confidence? All these elements are keeping you from [00:38:00] areas you need to go and I know myself You know when it's all said and done the pearl is what I want in life You know, I want the great blessings of God and so many times in life We get ourselves in a place where we're trusting in other things, you know, uh, we don't trust in God.

[00:38:17] Don: We don't allow God to have a part in developing us and making us what we need to be. We just trust that everything is going to be good. And I know a lot of times people roll the dice. They just say, you know what? I just want to be comfortable for the rest of my life. Don't let anything bother me. I'm not going after anything.

[00:38:37] Don: Just don't bother me. And I know sometimes I share messages about the fact that now is the time. Now, if we want to develop anything in our life, because I live with, and I'm going to go a little bit beyond here, but I live in the belief that, um, we're here for a period of time and then we step over into what They call in the Bible, eternity, which is forever.

[00:38:58] Don: And I believe that what [00:39:00] we 

[00:39:00] Justin: develop, because we're going to be talking about that in our next 

[00:39:02] Don: episode. Yes, very soon. That's right. That's why it's fresh in my mind. But you know, but what we do right now is we're developing ourselves for that spot in eternity. So there's going to be a time that we're going to either be patting ourself on the back or kicking.

[00:39:16] Don: trying to kick ourselves in the pants for the time we might have wasted while we're living life right now. And the reason a lot of times we waste it is because we don't have the confidence to step out and say, Hey, you know what? I am going to push myself a little bit. I'm not trying to find easy street because I know I've reached the age of where some people retire.

[00:39:37] Don: And, you know, and you reach an age where You could kick back and just do nothing. I know I've talked to some other guys that are at that age. I talked about getting a job and stuff like that. And they said, you know, forget this. I've done my time, all this. But I say to myself, this is valuable time. This is time for achieving things.

[00:39:56] Don: This is time for making hay like my father always said. This is time to [00:40:00] get it done, you know? And if there's an element that's keeping me from it, if I'm lacking in the confidence to step out, if I don't have the trust, I know the Bible talks about all over the place, be strong and have. good courage in what you're doing.

[00:40:14] Don: They would be sent out to battle, they'd be sent out for different things. You know, God would send, you tell them you need to be strong, you need to develop a courage, you need to be, , confident in who you are and realizing the source is there. You know, if, with God, all things, the Bible says, with God, all things are possible.

[00:40:32] Don: God is wanting to do the impossible in your life, but you have to get to the place where you're doing. The possible, you have to have the confidence to say, I'm going to do all that is possible. I'm going to develop myself, my life. You know, when people say I am bored, that just gives me something up my backbone.

[00:40:50] Don: I just can't stand that because it's telling me, what are you doing with your life? You know, because you should be improving every day, you know, confidence is, you know, I believe something is [00:41:00] greater than today in front of me and I'm going to continue to develop myself and I'm going to have the confidence to believe and trust that I have a source, Jesus Christ, and it's going to be side by side with me.

[00:41:11] Don: Walking with me because he did say as we've mentioned before that greatest things shall ye do if I go unto the father So I that blows my mind How can we top that act? I 

[00:41:22] Justin: mean he was yeah, he rose from the dead. He rose lazarus from the dead So we're supposed to be doing greater works than him, 

[00:41:29] Don: but you wonder what those works are see I mean he raised lazarus from the dead But you know a work of helping people that might open up somebody's life Somebody down the line might be a great This or that, but they need the confidence that we could put in ourselves to be able to develop ourselves.

[00:41:46] Don: To help them. Yeah. You know? And so how great is our work? You know, does, it doesn't look great in our eyes, but in God's eyes it is fantastic. Right? Because that's exactly what he's designed you for. Right? But you need the confidence to be developed in it [00:42:00] and that, and that's where. We live in a society, it casts a lot of doubt in a lot of wonder and a lot of worry, all this stuff.

[00:42:08] Don: We have to get 

[00:42:09] Justin: beyond all that. We got, yes, the worry, especially in the doubt, because a lot of people will try to talk you down and they'll try to place doubt into your, mind and they'll try. You'll start to believe what other people say you are. You'll start to believe what society says you are.

[00:42:25] Justin: And, you know, what you need to believe is who he says you are, right? When you find confidence in him, who he says that you are, then you know exactly what you want. And it's not like a cynicism. Like, you know exactly what you want. You're still humble about it, but 

[00:42:42] Justin: you know exactly which what you want and what your goal is because you got to have a goal There has to be an end goal. Otherwise, we're just all sitting here waking up going to sleep We don't really have we're not really driven. We don't really have any purpose. We're just letting our phone suck our minds dry Yeah, and then we wake up and do it all over again, [00:43:00] right?

[00:43:00] Justin: like you're saying there has to be there has to be a process where you're putting into action You're getting better each day. Yeah. And you know, that's what we're doing here. The Better You Enterprises. We're helping you get better each day. Every day you just want to be making some kind of progress.

[00:43:16] Justin: Yeah. Keep the focus. I like to keep the focus on God because that's the most important thing in my life. Yeah. It's definitely because I'm not I can't handle everything by myself. I don't have the confidence to handle everything by myself. I tried it before I tried it for 30 years prior and it didn't work out very well for you And it wasn't until I was missing a piece a giant puzzle piece that was missing right in the center Yeah I mean, I was looking at this thing every day thinking this thing is complete, but there's, there's a giant missing piece.

[00:43:49] Justin: Oh, yeah. And once you have that, I think you can really start to understand that the trust is there. Because you put yourself, you put your trust into [00:44:00] people, you know, I hate to say it, but people are gonna let you down. Yeah. Yeah. And it could be anybody, no matter who it is. Yeah. People are going to let you down, but you cannot let that interfere with your confidence.

[00:44:15] Justin: You can't let it interfere with your ability to love and keep trying in general, but you can't allow that to interfere with your confidence. Because once you place your trust in God, you understand what God is. You see what he does. You see that he forgives. You see that he restores. You see that unlike your other relationships and people in your life, he remains faithful.

[00:44:37] Justin: And he loves, he loves in a way that no one was able to do before for you. That's right. Um, And what he, and he also renews people, you know, he completely renews people. And when he does that in your life, and when you see yourself become a brand new version Of yourself. Yeah. And you know, when you die to your old ways or, but when you, when you really start to see [00:45:00] yourself become better because of what he's doing in your life.

[00:45:03] Justin: Yeah. That develops a confidence that nobody can take away from you. That's right. Because it wasn't given to you by anybody else. No. So the only, the only one, the only one that can take it away is the only, is the one that gave it to you. Yeah. And he's not going to take it away. 

[00:45:16] Don: No, that's for sure. Yeah, he's got something good going on here.

[00:45:21] Don: And I know, myself, because the Bible talks about strongholds. I remember I used to wrestle once in a while and, uh, if the guy could get me in a certain position 

[00:45:29] Justin: or whatever. Physically? You wrestled?

[00:45:31] Don: Oh yeah, physically a little bit, you know. Not great or anything, but you know, you get yourself in a certain position.

[00:45:37] Don: You just can't do anything anymore. You know, he's, you're saying uncle or I give up or whatever it is, you win, you win, you know, but the Bible talks about strongholds in our life. And those are strongholds in the mind. And those are a lot of times the lies that are spoken to us. We take them as truth. And the doubt, all this stuff becomes a stronghold in our mind.

[00:45:58] Don: We have reasons why [00:46:00] we can't do this and reasons why we can't do that. And that's where Jesus came to knock down the strongholds and to be able to set us free, to set the captives free so that we can have confidence in ourselves and be able to realize that, yeah, you know, if God before me, who can be against me?

[00:46:17] Don: Who can work against me? The plan of God that He has for you. And that's where a lot of times we have to be careful of these strongholds, things that we've allowed in our mind that put us into an uncle situation where we can't do anything. We have become too crippled to achieve. Our mind is crippled with doubt and lack of confidence.

[00:46:40] Justin: And we want do it with the goal in mind of helping other people. So I think the, I think where we ultimately want to get to is we want to be confident, but then we wanna, be righteous people. We wanna lead by example and we want to inspire people to be righteous because you, you talk about freedom and that's really what it's [00:47:00] setting the captive three being free.

[00:47:01] Justin: Mm-Hmm. , there is no freedom in the current state. of the world with the way everything is when we just think in terms of like psychology, which is great. It's great to know what feelings you're experiencing, how to deal with certain things, understanding traumas and stuff like that. But in Side of all of inside of that system inside of your feelings your thoughts and what's happening in your mind There really is no true freedom And I think we're seeing that with the suicide rates the amount of PTSD people have the anxieties depression Oh, you know, the only true freedom I think is in Jesus.

[00:47:39] Justin: Yeah, the only true freedom is accepting God into your life And that freedom is gonna give you confidence.

[00:47:46] Don: Yeah, and that's where I know, , There's an element here I think we should talk a little bit about, Justin, and it's talking about an old nature. An old nature is a nature that will doubt, uh,, and have a lot of issues.

[00:47:58] Don: But once we come and [00:48:00] invite Jesus to be a part of our life, there is a new nature. It's called, like, the hour I pray. first believed, the first trusted, it puts God into operation, you know, and as soon as a person can receive a word and can receive an understanding and open up their lives to Jesus Christ, something starts to happen because we've actually given him an opportunity to work in us.

[00:48:24] Don: And that changes everything. And that's where the Bible says that God hasn't given us a spirit of fear of doubt or lack of confidence. God hasn't given none of this to us. He wants to give us. All the confidence, you know, all the courage, everything that we need. And a lot of times in life, we are going to all other kinds of sources, trying to find that one element where He has it.

[00:48:48] Don: And the beauty of it, it isn't something that you have to save up a whole bunch of money for. It isn't something that you purchase. Because I remember going to, when I first came to the Lord, I went to the, uh, , store and [00:49:00] I said, how much can, do I have to pay for salvation? I was joking with this Christian store and he says, you can't buy this stuff and you really can't.

[00:49:07] Don: I bought a Bible for home, but I was joking with him, but you know, you don't, this stuff is free. It's all it takes is an element of belief, you know, and, and what happens is then you start developing that confidence. And that's where, if you can. Find a source. Find, , someone, people that, a church or something of that source that can minister to you, , and encourage you and help you develop that confidence in you.

[00:49:34] Don: Someone that can speak positive to you. Materials. Podcasts like this, but stuff like this, it helps you to see yourself for who you really are and what God has created you for. This is gold. This is priceless stuff. And that's where I know myself. I've been around this for a year or two and, you know, this is my life.

[00:49:55] Don: It's my life. I, I mean myself, it's easy to allow doubt, [00:50:00] lack of confidence, all this stuff to slip in and, but you know, you get wise, you get wise as time goes on, you start to realize where it's coming from, what you need to do to keep yourself encouraged and, uh, you know, and you grow. You grow in him and a whole new nature becomes a whole new nature way of looking at things and it's beautiful It really is because you have yourself a real hope for the future you realize, you know Everything that you're involved in right now.

[00:50:26] Don: It's part of you part of your process part of your greatness part of everything So you put everything into trusting that he will take care of your every need. 

[00:50:36] Justin: Yeah, I have plans To prosper you, not to harm you, to give you a hope and a 

[00:50:40] Don: future. That is true. Yes, he does. That's well 

[00:50:43] Justin: said. And I think just to wrap it up here, I would say, I would highly recommend people to write down, kind of like I did, is write down.

[00:50:51] Justin: What is it that you want? Well, what is it that you're after? Write it down because you can, when you're writing something down, we don't write many things down nowadays. So when [00:51:00] you're writing in general, there's like a mind body connection there. And even a spiritual connection, it's therapeutic, but just watching those words being written down, because you can sit there and scroll through three, four hours of YouTube shorts in a day.

[00:51:13] Justin: And you won't really retain any of the information that was in those videos. But if you write something down and you put it. Somewhere where you can see it every day and you focus on that every day. Eventually, it's going to become a belief. Because you're seeing it every day. Just like everything else, when you see it multiple times over and over again, it's going to be a belief.

[00:51:33] Justin: And once it becomes a belief, like we're saying, I think it all starts with belief and it takes over from there. 

[00:51:39] Don: And the beauty of that, it takes on a life of its own. Yes. You know, you start to see elements of your life taking on a life of their own, and then you know someone else is in the midst of it.

[00:51:50] Justin: Well, I think that wraps it 

[00:51:52] Don: up for today. This was a good one, Justin. I think so 

[00:51:55] Justin: too. Hey, we're glad you guys found your way here today, and we [00:52:00] hope you can join us again next week for another good word. Until then, stay 

[00:52:05] Don: blessed, bye the best, see you guys.