The Confident Podcast

Ep 163 | How to Stay Confident After a Career Setback

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We all experience  transitions and challenges within our careers. In this week’s episode, we are sitting down with Kelsey Snyder, Program Director at Lead, to talk about how to overcome career setbacks and find your confidence. Kelsey shares her story of spending 12 years in the sales and tech world before joining Lead. Join us for this empowering conversation full of tips and insights on how to confidently bounce back in your career!

Chapters:

  • 0:00 - Intro & Meet Guest Kelsey
  • 12:35 - Navigating Career Transitions and Self-Care
  • 24:01 - Finding Balance During Career Transition
  • 29:20 - Key Takeaways & Outro


Guest Kelsey Snyder’s Info to Connect:


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Kelsey:

This is my story and owning it and like this is what it is and this is what I'm doing next, and maybe there's a question mark. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, I think just own your story.

Lisa:

Welcome to the Confident Podcast. I am Lisa Tarkington, your host of this podcast. If you found yourself hitting play on this podcast, it means it was meant for you. My goal is to help, empower and guide you to become a better version of yourself through conversation, advice and tips that are real, vulnerable and authentic. I am excited to have you join this journey with me. So let's get started.

Lisa:

So, before we kind of dive into this convo, I always love giving you guys updates and having a conversation about what's going on, and it is summertime in Michigan, and let me tell you I don't know everybody that's tuning in, but I will say summertime in Michigan is a really big deal. First off, we all try to take our Fridays off. People are taking their vacations and people are just in better moods, and so if you have looked at your summer schedule and you kind of feel overwhelmed or you're not sure of what are your goals for the summer, I just want you to pause, I want you to take a break and I want you to think about well, what is the one thing that I want to accomplish this summer. I remember about three years ago my goal was that every Friday I was going to take off and go up north and enjoy the summer. And I did that. And that was one of the coolest things was I set that out right away and then I was able to see at the end how much I got to enjoy the summer Because here in Michigan. To see at the end how much I got to enjoy the summer Because here in Michigan it doesn't last long and that's really what helped me stay going, because I knew that I would be finishing up and doing a lot of things come fall and winter with my career. So maybe your goal is just to spend time with loved ones, maybe that you want to pick up pickleball and do that once a week, or maybe join a volleyball team on the sand courts, whatever that is. I just want you to challenge yourself to make time for it Because, like us in Michigan, summertime goes so quickly and then we always look at fall and we say I wish I would have done this and I wish I would have done that. So pick that one thing and focus on it so that you can enjoy this summer. So that's my speech or tip for the day. But we are going to be talking about a conversation that I get a lot of questions about and I'm not going to be doing this alone. I'll introduce our guest here in a second. But it is all about how to overcome career setbacks, even when you lose confidence in yourself for a while. So I want to preface and define kind of a little bit of what career setbacks could be. So they could be job loss, maybe a layoff, maybe a company closure, maybe it's a missed promotion, maybe you were passed over for a promotion, maybe you've had a career change, maybe you have gone into retirement, maybe you have personal circumstances that have set you back, or maybe the economy has taken a downturn. So all of these things can be different setbacks. I shouldn't actually say the retirement one is a setback, maybe it's just a change. These are all things that are transitions that cause us to kind of step back, re-evaluate things, but also sometimes challenges our confidence in ourself. And I know that all of these things kind of resonated with me. These are conversations I have on a daily basis. These are things that I've gone through myself and one of the things that, for me, was really learning my value, my worth, slowing down and all of these amazing things that we're going to dive into here in a little bit. K But, like I said, I'm not going to be talking about this today alone, so we are going to be bringing on someone who is very, very special to me. So I want to introduce Kelsey Snyder. She is our programs director at Lead, but before, like, she got that title, kelsey and I met, I believe, last July, so it had been almost a year of friendship and the first time I met her one of the things that stood out the most to me was the questions that she asked, the conversation, but also when we grabbed coffee. It was just kind of like a flow of a conversation where you're like, oh, this is my long last best friend that can read my mind, and ever since then Kelsey's been able to do that. We've been able to grow lead because of her skill set, and one of the conversations we've had a lot is growing in our confidence, how we've overcome setbacks and also career moments. So, kelsey, welcome to the Confident Podcast. Thank you. I'm excited to be here.

Lisa:

Yes, so, okay. So I gave a little bit of our background, but I'd love for you to share with the audience what's your background.

Kelsey:

Yeah, so I came from a sales background. First I was in sales for about three years, joined a big corporate tech company out of college, moved to Chicago, made 150 calls a day, you know, lived that grind for a while. And then I moved into sales management and so that was really fun. I really liked that. George and I had always said my husband, we would stay in Chicago until it wasn't fun anymore, until the logistics of the city didn't offset the fun that we were having. And so we hit that point. About five years in we wanted to settle down, start a family and we knew we wanted to do that back at home in Michigan. So we moved back. And when I was moving back the company actually asked me if I had considered operations because you could do that remotely.

Kelsey:

And it was funny, because I couldn't manage a sales team remotely, which is what everybody's doing now, but we're a little ahead of the curve and so I moved into operations and eventually managed a global team, was a director for corporate operations and that was really fun. A lot of stuff that I didn't know how to do in the beginning and just kind of figured it out and that kind of was a through line throughout my career of just kind of being like this is what I like to do, this is what I'm good at, this is what people come to me for. And then someone saying have you considered this and whatnot? So yeah, that's what brought me back to Michigan. And then we'll go into kind of probably the rest of the story here in a bit.

Lisa:

Yeah, so I also have to share that. Kelsey and I are both Michigan State University grads, so go green to anybody tuning in. And when you said the Chicago thing about we'll leave when it's no more fun, I love that. You spent five years let's be honest having a blast in Chicago, partying it up, because every time when I would visit for my corporate job back then I would be like oh, where are we going? Where are we having brunch? And like we're, you know, or brunches are the best.

Lisa:

They are and so I just love that you were able to experience that before you know, you and your husband transitions. So, speaking of transitions, when you hear the words career setback as well as confidence, kind of what comes to mind.

Kelsey:

For me personally, this is kind of a twofold. So when I was a sales manager sales you had goals and if you didn't hit those goals then it wasn't a fit for you and you had to move on. And as a sales manager, I worked with teams to make sure we built skills to try to bring you back on board. But sometimes it just isn't a fit and so I've had to deliver the conversation that you know this isn't working out and had to let people go for my team and people that I really liked personally, and from those I tried to help them understand like you're really good at these aspects, right, maybe I was a business development manager, so maybe cold calling wasn't for you, but you were great at like, building that relationship and you would be an awesome account manager, and so could we find a different spot for you.

Kelsey:

And then personally, it affected me in a whole different way. You know our paths crossed in July and so our company had been going through a lot of restructuring resizing, which I think a lot of people can relate to, especially in the tech sector in the last year or so, two years and so I was impacted by the transition and it was hard. I had three rounds of that happening throughout that past year. Of employees on my team I had friends that I've worked with for 12 years, you know, and so when it affected me personally, you know you can't help. But you know intellectually, like this is the spreadsheet, there's a line that's drawn, it's. You know they're trying to right, size the business to where it is now, but that doesn't change emotionally how that feels, especially after you know being there that long, yeah, and how long were you at the, at the company, before you came to us?

Lisa:

12 years.

Kelsey:

Okay, so yeah, between the sales and operations side. Yeah.

Lisa:

Yeah, and a person changes a lot. In 12 years you evolve. Yes, like that's right, like so, you, you, you started your career, you've built yourself there and so having that news and having that change to your point, you know it. But the ego probably played in there a little bit.

Kelsey:

Yeah, I wanted to go out and get a better like the promotion of like the job I had.

Lisa:

You know that was like the first thing that comes to mind to be like hey guys, like look at what I'm capable of, right? Is that what you mean?

Kelsey:

Yes, yes, exactly. And. And then I had to stop and go. Is that even what you want next? And so I told and I had talked to quite a few people after and I'll never forget the people that reached out I think it's one of those things where you don't know what to say.

Kelsey:

It's uncomfortable. I mean, like I said, I had experience with a couple of waves before that of people that I knew impacted and the ones that I was really close to. Of course, I reached out. But there are some that you feel like, well, I'm not that good of a friend, like should I, shouldn't I? And I would just say to anybody that kind of finds themselves in there, reach out, because those days and week after it helped me so much. Because you're in your head and you're kind of going like, well, if I would have done this or maybe this would have been different. And then the other side of you is going well, I'm glad this happened, it's a blessing. And you just kind of keep going back and forth and so you never know what someone's going through or like what part of the wave they're riding, because I will never forget those people that reached out.

Kelsey:

And there was a senior leader that said to me he had saw my confidence grow as I worked my way up and built this global team and he had said, I hope this doesn't affect your confidence, like he just flat out said that he's like I hope you don't doubt yourself because this had nothing to do with you. And I was like, oh, it's just, you needed to hear the words. And again, it's like you know intellectually these things, but for someone to say that to you. So, and then I had another group of friends that this was my favorite gift I got. I got a bottle of tequila and a bottle of champagne and they were like it's a bittersweet ending, but we can't wait to see what you do next. And I just I love that because they left room for both sides of it, because you're going. Yes, this stinks, but like I'm also like what is next?

Lisa:

Yes, and like they were your cheerleaders, and I think that that's like to your point. Sometimes it's not we don't say anything because we have nothing to say, but sometimes even the one or two words mean more than anything. And so when you were going through all of this, you know a couple of things came up when you were talking about that. So, first off, it sounded like it did impact your confidence for a little bit. So take us to that moment when, like, you started to notice like, oh, it's getting, it's infected.

Kelsey:

Yeah, I think right after the news news. I cried actually when I got the news and I didn't expect to because I had kind of like I said there had been multiple rounds. You can kind of feel it when things. I'm definitely somebody that pays attention to shifts and yes, you have a lot of self-awareness with that, yeah, and so I was like, oh, I don't know if it's gonna happen to me.

Kelsey:

I don't know if it means I'm gonna to me, I don't know if it means I'm going to move to a different team, but I just it didn't feel like where I was at was going to be where I would end up. And it was kind of interesting because I think in that moment you have a choice to make. If you find yourself in your career, you have to say I'm going to look for something different, proactively, this doesn't feel good, yep. And so I'm going to find something different. And my kids are young, I have two kids, and so for me, I was ready to ride it out to see what happened, because I just the job was really demanding, and so the idea of adding job seeking on top of that, like. But in doing so I had to make a choice. You know that, like, I am going to stick it out, yep. And so what? What was I gonna do with my time there? Because I couldn't just be pouting that. This didn't feel as fun as it did 12 years ago, yeah, and so I think that that was kind of part of that. So I made a little bit of peace with it.

Kelsey:

But after the news happened, I you know I process things by walking and I walked eight miles the day that I found out, because it just kept going and I would sit down and I just like didn't know what to do with my hands. So I'm just like walking, walking, walking, and that kind of became the thing that I did throughout. I walked every morning, dropped the kids off, went for a walk. That was something I did while I was working and so it was kind of that like touchstone, of like felt like me still yeah, and then I would get on the computer and I kind of just kept that same routine getting on the computer, looking at jobs. But it was just a wave, like there were times where.

Kelsey:

I thought, oh, this is great, there's so many neat things that you could do next. And then there were other times where I thought, oh, this is great, there's so many neat things that you could do next. And then there are other times where I was just like, oh my gosh, like what are we gonna do? Everyone that I talked to kept saying just sit in it, like, just enjoy this break. And I'm like, yeah, I can do that if you're telling me, like in three months in your golden crystal ball, like you're going to have a job great.

Lisa:

I would love to relax for three months, but I just am not wired like that. Yes, yes, well. And that's like hard to process too, because when you have young kids, when you are early in your career, you're not like, well, I'm going to ride this out to retirement. You are literally like I got a long ways ahead of me. I need to figure out where the income is coming. Like I think about, like I get very you know, black and white with those things. And that's really hard because you're like I know I'm going to find the thing, but I don't want to be patient and I don't know the timing of it.

Kelsey:

Right and so that was exactly it and I was also thinking, ok, it's July, that's tough, a lot of companies in the summer. So then you have this window in the fall, but then don't wait too late because then it shuts down. You know, you almost know too much for your own good, because you've rolled out building teams and stuff, and so you know, it suddenly becomes this like this is the window and it's hard, Well, and you made me think of, too, like you worked in sales, like it's like prospecting in a way, it's like well, I know that I like, if I don't start now, in three months I won't have one day, right, like sometimes it does for people, but like sometimes it doesn't.

Lisa:

And so I like I appreciate you saying that like how you felt, I thought of and again, I don't know all the stages, but I thought of grief, right, like you know, like you get through it, you have so many highs and lows, and just like all of all the feels, and sometimes you're like I don't know why I'm crying, because I know that the light is there, like I know I'm gonna find something, I know I'm good enough, but it's kind of scary. Yes, yes, for sure, taking care of your health isn't always easy, but it should at least be simple. That's why, for the last three to four years, I have been drinking AG1 every day, no exceptions. It's just one scoop mixed in water once a day every day, and it makes me feel energized and ready to take on the day. That's because each serving of AG1 delivers my daily dose of vitamins, minerals and probiotics. It's a powerful, healthy habit that's so simple.

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Lisa:

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Lisa:

I can't imagine that process. I mean, I can't imagine because I've gone through very similar things. I shouldn't even say that, but I think that it's one of those things where, until you're in it, it's hard to understand. But we've all had different types of career setbacks and so when you think about a career setback, or you know you had one, but also it opened up other areas for you, so talk us through. Like you started to apply for jobs, how did that feel? Because you sat in me and like I want to prove all these people that I can do this Like. Talk us through that.

Kelsey:

Yeah, it's funny, it's the ego that goes OK, let's just do exactly what you had done before, but for another similar company. Yeah, I was lucky in that I worked with a lot of partners, external partners, and I managed those relationships.

Kelsey:

But there was something in my body that just was like the idea of doing the same exact thing, you know, because the grass isn't greener. You know, like I think anyone will say that, like the struggles in a particular industry, they're at every place and you know there might be a different strategy behind it or whatnot, but when you get down to it, it's going to be the same. And so I had really enjoyed what I was doing, and a lot of that was related to the teams that I was working on. So a huge part for me was I didn't want to apply for anything that I didn't know someone there and know that they were happy, yeah, and so that puts a filter. And then I noticed when I was applying for some, I would get a canned rejection email and you know it came pretty quick. So you're like all right, and for the moment you're like really, yeah, you know, and then Defeat.

Lisa:

And then I noticed that.

Kelsey:

Then very quickly that passed and I went oh. And then I think that just something I try to pay attention to is like how things made me feel Right and so, even though intellectually I might not know how, maybe you want to do something different or maybe I'm not willing to admit that to myself quite yet there were kind of these signals where after the third time, where I was like you know, that's all right, but I was like maybe you should start looking at something a little different where your skills could be applied in a similar way but isn't too much of just the same grind? Because I mean we had been ever since COVID, like so many companies had been trying to rebound from that. So it had been a bit of a grind. And so I thought, well, let's see what else you know there might be, and maybe going from thousand person company down to, you know, a small four.

Kelsey:

You know, see, what that's all about, and so I kind of just started to think about that a little bit more. And I am part of the junior league and so I had kind of a taste of the nonprofit. It's all volunteer based, but I've been leading their fundraising for five years now, excited to be handing that off this year.

Kelsey:

And one of the things I liked about it. I was like, oh, I enjoyed fundraising, that was something that was cool. Kind of mixed the sales, some of the corporate background. I thought maybe I'll look into that. So I kind of started applying for jobs through that, which was like how our paths crossed and I think what's been interesting throughout the career is just listening for that. Have you thought about this? You know, I always have this kind of in my head. I was like you've done fundraising before, so you can go into the nonprofits, do fundraising and then you can work your way up to executive director. But that's like you're in, because that's what you had some experience with, you know. And but I'd like to say I always have a goal or I'm very future forward thinking, but I don't do it with blinders on. I'm not afraid to say, oh, that's interesting or like that person and like for you.

Kelsey:

I mean, we just had that connection and it was something that was really fun and I was like I feel like there's something here and at that time like there wasn't, but we started the conversation.

Lisa:

Yes, and I think that that's a great reminder for everybody. Listening in is like I think our egos take over when our heart's telling us our direction. I literally just had this conversation with someone last night via text message, because they're struggling with something very similar, but what's coming up for them is they're feeling it in their heart, kind of like you knew. But I think the ego takes over, and what we chatted about was how society sometimes makes you feel like you need to have a certain path. So did that come up for you throughout this whole process?

Kelsey:

I think I was just really proud that there were very few people that I could talk to that wouldn't know the company I was at, like I didn't have to explain what it was and things, and I was very proud of that. I was very proud of that coming out of college and then as I worked my way up, and so for me that was kind of part of the filter in the next job is like, well, I'd want them to know what this is. And it's like, yeah, this is a great story once you know what's on the other end of it, right, and your great life lesson and there's lots of things. And you're like, yeah, yeah, I know, but tell me what the next story is first, yes, then I'll work backwards.

Lisa:

And is first, yes, so you talked a little bit about the support piece too and like it sounds like a lot of those people you can even probably picture them of who supported you, what they need to do for you. So we've talked a little bit about like changing jobs and stuff. It's also about like to like what, if you're a mom or dad deciding to stay home, that like could look like a career setback quote unquote you know to and then your confidence is changing or all of these different things that kind of come up when it comes to career changes, and so what would you say to people listening and that like that you think that was really helpful for support. Maybe just elaborating a little bit more on what you said and also like what should people ask for? Like how, how would I, if I was struggling with this, ask my friends or family for support?

Kelsey:

This one's tricky because I feel like you can kind of go one extreme or the other. You can kind of fall in the camp that you just really busy yourself, so then you don't sit still long enough to hear from yourself like what's next. And I was very intentional not to fall into that. I actually didn't start a project, which was crazy given this like months of free time. I didn't start a project, I just didn't feel like it and I just didn't want to distract myself. I was trying to just like sit in it, yeah, but then on the flip side, you don't want to go to just sitting there and then getting to in your head, yeah, because you do have those waves that you mentioned, and so it can be dangerous to just sit in it too long either. So that's like kind of.

Kelsey:

The tricky part is I would plan something to look forward to with friends so that there was still that social interaction. And then I tried to give myself and this, this is just me personally, I like routines I tried to give myself what's my new routine. So, like I mentioned, I walked, then I would hop on the computer and then after lunch I just kind of said that's enough, because there would never be enough. You get down the rabbit hole of looking at jobs and whatnot or a blog post about the perfect resume, or then you read about AI and how it's changing the way you know, and it just you can go down a whole rabbit hole. And so I just said, two o'clock, I'm done, do something for myself. Read meet a friend for early dinner. You know whatever that might look like. And so I think asking people you know to come to dinner or to meet up for a walk or to meet for coffee, right, because that was the thing we could do in the middle of the day, kind of a thing.

Kelsey:

And then I tried to have a quote unquote meeting, like I would chat with somebody that I'd worked with over my career, and there were some people that had reached out proactively, so that was really easy. They had heard the news was great that they reached out. There are people that I worked with like two or three years ago and I thought that was so sweet. You know, some of them were going through something similar or had, and so they were like this was a site that really helped me. I did this. They had tips. There were other people that were just like oh man, here's what I'm doing now. Here's some people I know, like if you want me to introduce you to anybody, if you see me connected to anyone on LinkedIn I thought that was a really generous offer, because maybe you don't know but, like, if I'm looking at a certain company and I see that so-and-so is connected, they were just like don't hesitate, I would love to make an introduction. Those were some things people did too.

Lisa:

Yeah, and that's like the world is great, guys, right.

Kelsey:

Like, we all like have these.

Lisa:

Like you know, there's so much negative going on sometimes but, like, there's so much true beauty and people supporting each other. Yes, so this is kind of going to be a twofold question. So it's almost been a year, so the first question is going to be how are you now? And then the second question I want to ask you is um, what would you tell yourself a year ago?

Kelsey:

I am great. Now I'm having a lot of fun.

Lisa:

We have a lot of fun we do. I think this is not a moment of like performance guys. No, it is not we do. We just have a lot of fun.

Kelsey:

It was the perfect blend of taking the things that I felt confident in in my job and being able to apply them, but in a new industry. So there's still enough like getting my footing on the nonprofit space, obviously with your curriculum and some of those pieces, and so it's also been a time to be able to figure out like where is my lane and like who do I work best with and the people that I've. I always give an example of one of the guys that was on my team before. I was always intimidated, like when he came in for the interview, I was intimidated by him and that's how I knew that like he was going to. He just had a different. He was a super strong candidate, could have had my job, right, yeah, and he had, but I, he had a different skill set than I did, and so that was like very cool and I felt that way about you. I was like she's built this nonprofit, like that's super cool. I don't have any desire to get up in front of all of these people.

Lisa:

I'm just pretending, these cameras aren't here right now.

Kelsey:

You know, you know teaching and doing, you know speaking engagements and things I was like. But there's something special here and so it was just fun to be able to find that niche where it was enough new but enough familiar that I felt like I could bring something, yes, yes.

Lisa:

And so what would you tell yourself a year ago, knowing, knowing now where you're at, I guess, which is very hard.

Kelsey:

It's very annoying because it'd be like what everybody told me, it was like enjoy this time off. And I just I even told me was like enjoy this time off. And I just I even told myself, like I know you're gonna look back and say I wish I would have enjoyed this time off. I tried to, but that's just. It's just not my wiring. Yes, I like to have a plan and so I had to kind of come to peace with that.

Lisa:

That like that is what it is exactly exactly because I look back to like I remember when I graduated from Michigan State, I just wanted a job so quickly. Well, I got one right away and I wish so badly that I would have asked to like move it out a little bit because I was part of a program so I could have backpacked in Europe. All of those, like all the things now I wish I would have done, but in the moment you're like I am an A to Z person, like I know where I need to be, I want to make money. Like I didn't have money in college. I was broke, like all of these things.

Lisa:

The other thing that really came up when you were talking is I will. I literally think I still have the video on my iPad. But, like when I left my corporation to build my nonprofit, I had and I've shared this on here before like I had twenty five dollars in my bank account. And I remember FaceTiming one of our site directors that lived in Louisiana, and I remember being like in a hoodie, no makeup, probably hadn't showered in two days. If I'm being completely honest and just being like, what am I doing? And just sobbing to her and she's like Lisa, like this will make sense one day I'm like this is not going to make, like I just knew I had to do it, but it didn't make sense.

Lisa:

At the same time, and I think that, like when you're in the moment, kind of what you said it's like it's okay to feel what you need to feel, because had I not felt that, I wouldn't have woken up the next day. I would have. I think I would have continued to play the whole like just blocking out the emotions and then I wouldn't have felt what I needed to feel. And so now, looking at that, and like even you, it's, it's very easy to say like I would have given the same advice to someone else, but also now it's more like now I understand, yeah, how hard it is to take that advice. Yeah, oh, absolutely so. One of the projects that you've been working on for us has also been around like teaching um. So we built a digital platform I've talked a lot about this on here a membership platform, and how do you think those tools would have helped you overcome any setbacks that you would have in a career or even with your confidence, had you had those?

Kelsey:

The one thing I I think the thing that sets our tool apart is that is the worksheets and the interactive component. I think there are a lot of courses out there, there's a lot of podcasts, you know, like this one where you can listen to the advice. I think you do a good job of giving ideas for activities or how can you take this a step deeper. But I think that that's the piece, because you just kind of have to sit in it a little bit and you just have to. For me, I have to write it out. Um, I journaled a lot and it's kind of fun. I told myself I need to journal when I'm in a good headspace more, because I'm going to like look back at my life and just be like, wow, this was a lot of drama

Kelsey:

but I don't think to write that, um.

Kelsey:

So I think that that part for me would have been really helpful the reflection, I think, of the activity with the shifting your perspective and the stories you tell yourself, and that challenging part. I think that would have been huge. Right, because you asked me at the beginning of the day it's probably a different story than the end of the day or the next day, you know and so even just being able to look back at those, because you get to pick back up where you left off, so say, I complete one of them, go on to the next topic, I get this new job, you can go back and you can kind of see those, you can see trends. Yes, you know, like this comes up for me again I've had this before where I go right and I start reading the passage from before and I'm like this is so annoying, like we're still talking about the same thing. Right, yeah, substituting the characters, but like, yes, it's the same. And so I think for me, the interactive tools and hands-on and being able to come back to it is huge.

Lisa:

I love that and I also like, as you were talking through all of those things I think about too. It's like when you start to see those themes, you're like either I'm going to do something about it or I'm going to keep writing the same same story. Right, like what is? Am I really going to make that change? And I think that that's the one thing that I've learned just over the course of my whole confidence career is like I'm in charge of my own story.

Lisa:

I'm also in charge of allowing fear to take over or, like I'm also allowed to, I'm also the one in charge of choosing when my confidence takes over. And so, like thinking through all of those, so kind of going back. So we talked a little bit about like when you're, when you're going through something, how people can support you, how you needed that support, what kind of the feels that you went through at that time, and that probably related to a lot of people in all different aspects. So what's your final piece of advice that you would give our audience today that might be tuning in, being like, wow, I'm going through a transition right now, regardless of even if it's not changing jobs, but there's a lot of career changes that can happen.

Kelsey:

I think just telling your story I think it's a lot less scary.

Lisa:

Part of me was part of the panic was how am I going to?

Kelsey:

explain this? Yeah Right. And if you talked about someone who wanted to transition from you know the, from their career, to staying at home, if you get asked the what do you do question at a party, you felt super confident in your decision to do that right, to make that change. You knew all the reasons. But suddenly, when that comes up, you're like I just stay at home and the just just like is a dagger. You know when you hear that from people where I'm like you don't just for one, yeah, no mom or dad just does.

Kelsey:

But so just practice that story and I think the more you say it, you believe it too and you hear it and you're like, oh, you know, this did make sense for me or this is what happened. But here's what I learned, and I think a lot of this I don't know a lot of my fear with confidence came more for, like, telling how do I explain this? I actually felt pretty confident saying it to my friends that were in the field, because they know it's. You know you don't want to be like but it wasn't performance based. You know, like you don't have to explain that to them, but like to my grandma, who didn't even understand what it was, I was doing yes, yes, yes, exactly. And so I think just kind of like getting comfortable with like this is my story and owning it and like this is what it is and this is what I'm doing next, and maybe there's a question mark.

Lisa:

Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah yeah, yeah, I think just own your story.

Lisa:

I love that. And you made me think, too, like one of the things that I just see a lot of people is we justify our story. We try to justify, like, why I chose to stay home or why I decided to leave my career, or you know why. It wasn't a performance issue, like right, Like all of these things. And even if it was a performance issue, like I'm going to take that stand, like oh, totally.

Lisa:

I also believe that, like you even said, like earlier, like you've had to let people go because they weren't performing in that role, that is okay, because now you get to go do your strengths elsewhere, and I think all of those things is like that's my like. I love that advice because our stories are so different and I think that's what makes us human. Like all of the tools and teachings that we teach can be across all spectrums of who you are. You know, a couple of weeks ago, we even shared on the podcast how to make this blueprint of like for you, like taking all these tools and making it yourself. It's the same with your story. And, lastly, I'll say, when you say that is, the people that matter are just going to have your back, but like you don't need to justify to Joe in the hardware store or Joe at Walmart I don't know. I'm making these up as.

Lisa:

I talk, but you don't like because they're not part of your everyday Right and so just realizing like who's your support system through it. So, kelsey, thank you so much for being on this podcast. Love chatting about this. I loved. I actually like got chills a few times when you were talking about it because a lot of it resonates with me. Even even though our stories are different, they're similar. You know, and I think that that's the other piece too out of all of this is like we've all had career setbacks, we've all had job changes for the most part, and it's okay. What your story is? Um, because you're going to do amazing things with this world absolutely, and the more you share it, the more you.

Kelsey:

That forms connection, because someone else will have a similar one. Yes, and give them.

Lisa:

And give them the grace to keep moving forward as well. So, as I always say, continue to spread love and kindness to everybody that you meet and have a great day. Thank you for tuning into the Confident Podcast. If you enjoyed today's episode, don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, follow the Confident Podcast on Instagram and TikTok and share it with those who might benefit. Also, if you are looking to work one-on-one with me, message and follow me on Instagram at LisaTarkingtonOfficial. Stay confident, stay inspired and until next time, keep striving to be the best version of yourself. Take care.

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