Decide On Joy
Importance of Beliefs and Values
Hello, and welcome to Decide on Joy, a podcast coming to you from Harmony Spiritual Center in Fort Worth, Texas. I'm Jim Covalt, and
Pjae:I'm Rev. Dr. P. J. Stanley. Welcome.
Jim:and this, this podcast is about talking about basic elements of New Thought Spirituality and how they work in life and how they can help you to create your best life and in fact to decide on joy. And, and just a brief thing, what is new thought?
Pjae:Exactly. And so I say this every time I'll say it again now, there are no new thoughts. There's nothing new under the sun, we know that. But when we say new thought, what we're asking you to do or to think about is that you can change your mind at any time. You can change your mind, you can change your life. So we believe that our life, the reality that we, that we're, that we're in, the life that we're in, the, what we manifest starts with what we think. What we believe and what we think, that's where it starts. So if we want to change what our life looks like, we get to change how and what we're thinking about to change that manifested reality. So that's what New Thought is. Have a new thought. Have a different thought. And have a different life. If you want that.
Jim:And today we're talking about the importance of beliefs and values, which are not just That's totally the same thing. They're right. They're not. They're not. Okay. They're
Pjae:not. So
Jim:what are our beliefs?
Pjae:Yeah. And so, so I, I, this is an important topic to me because, because what we believe is how we, is how we step out into the world. We step out based on what we believe. So beliefs are simply what we believe to be true. And, and it's how we determine whether something is right or wrong or good or bad or positive or negative. We simply believe this about something. And so, just, just a quick example of that is, is, is many people believe there's a, there's a higher power, that there is something in the universe present that, and, and available to us to help us have a life that we're looking for. And some people believe that you know, that, To be a good American means to be loyal to a fault and be a loyal patriot and, you know, join the military and all of that. That could be true. It's not true for everybody, though. And so just what you believe to be true is how you, how you guide your life, how you direct your life, how you take action in your life. And so it's really critical that you, that you, that you know what you believe, that you know what you believe. Yeah.
Jim:How, how can you? Yeah. Yeah. Confirm that for yourself or, or, or clarify that for yourself, I guess would be the question. So there's
Pjae:a, there's a couple of ways. Number one, I think the first reason that we start to look at what it is we believe, a good reason to do that is because life isn't quite showing up the way you think it should. Things aren't quite working out and you're starting to wonder, what is happening here? I, I really feel like I'm a good person and all of that, but life isn't quite working out. So. And what we get to do is start asking ourselves, what is it that I believe and why do I believe that? And the reason that we do that is because a lot of the beliefs that we have are in us because of what our parents thought. What our parents told us what people in authority over our lives, teachers, parents your, your, your leader in the military, whatever, even someone that you look up to and you see as a, as a a guide for you, as you see it as a mentor for you. So we believe them and we take those on, not, not necessarily questioning why that's true or is it always true? Is it sometimes true? When is it true? Right. You know? And so beginning to question what we believe is true is the beginning of taking control of your life and saying, okay, this is actually what I value because beliefs, values come from what you believe.
Jim:Yeah. And, and sometimes not just from, you're not just receiving stuff from individual people. It can also, it's sort of an insidious thing in the culture altogether. The collective consciousness. You may not even be aware that that is a choice to believe that. That is
Pjae:great. That is right. I, I know that I, you know, I'm not going to give away my age, but let me just say that I was raised at a time where it was believed that girls, women weren't good at math or, you know, you know, things like that and I was fortunate enough to be raised by parents who just never said that. They just thought you were smart to do whatever it is you wanted to do. And so I didn't know I wasn't supposed to be able to do that. I had no idea. And it was really I was able to do a lot of things in school because people were impressed by the fact that I could do math well And it's just so something that I did and was encouraged to do by my parents. So that's one thing that I believe because my parents always told me I was smart And I believed them And so I step in the world like i'm smart not a smart but but a smart But i'm smart, you know what I mean? Yeah Yeah,
Jim:yeah So So You mentioned that sometimes things can be going not like you expect and that might cause you to challenge what it is you believe.
Pjae:Do you want an example of that? Yeah. Yeah. So one of the biggest things for me and it could be for other people, is the idea of prosperity. Because we are So, what I believe is that there is a higher presence in this universe that we're all a part of, that we're all can tap into, and that is an abundant presence. It's a, it's a universal principle or universal law of abundance. I believe that. But I was raised with this idea in the Bible that money is the root of all evil. So, and that's just in the back of my mind all the time. So, so, to, to want. Money makes me think that I'm being selfish or that, you know, I'm being, I'm being an evil person. But when I think about, and if you think about what, if you were to win the lottery, I ask this question to everyone when they think about what they would do with money or whether money was evil. If you were to win the lottery, seriously, what's the first thing that you would do? You know, you pay your bills off. I get all that. But after all your stuff is taken care of, what then would you do? I'm asking you that question, Jim. What would you do if you won the lottery and all your bills were paid?
Jim:I well I would probably put some of it in some sort of, you know, account. But also, I would certainly give a lot of it away. Exactly. Both to individuals and to organizations, you know. Exactly.
Pjae:Exactly. I don't know anyone that hasn't answered that question exactly that way. I would help my family. My home my mom, you know, take care of my parents take care of my siblings, you know Take care of the family and then start thinking about well what maybe put a grant, you know, put a some sort of non Nonprofit together that would help other people whatever you're passionate about if you're passionate about the homeless or your passion or the unhoused You're you're passionate about women's right? Whatever you're passionate about you put money into seeing that happen feeding the hungry, whatever those things are. So You So it's not, it's not, and if you go back and look at that Bible quote, it's not money is the root of all evil, it's the love of money. That's the root of all evil So so I have to go back when I look and think well, I if I believe and I do That the universe is abundant but whenever Money starts coming my way. I start getting itchy about it You know, I mean so to go back and think about and really talk with myself and pray about it and all that to let Go of that idea That money is the root of all evil because that has been in my in my in my heart and life and mind my whole life Right. Okay, and so I look at that now and know that's not true. That's not, that's not really true.
Jim:And even without that, I mean I think that I, I sort of inherited from my family that there's a certain range of things that you should be in. Correct. You know? Correct. There's not exactly a class that you belong to, but it is kind of that, and, and that's where you're comfortable. Right. Right. So, it doesn't feel right to say, oh, I, I would like twenty million dollars, please. You're
Pjae:being greedy.
Jim:What do you need twenty million dollars for? Yes. Yeah. Yeah.
Pjae:Exactly. And so, we have to question where that comes from so that we're free. We just have to free up our minds and hearts because if, if what's in our lives, if what we manifest comes from our thoughts, and our thoughts come from what we believe, then what we're manifesting. can be changed if we look at what we believe and find out and let go of what is no longer serving. We can just let go of it. Oh, we, and some things aren't as easy as easy. The pro prosperity thing isn't as easy for me to let go of. But I am I am a lot further down the road with understanding that yeah, the universe is abundant and I am not a, a greedy person and I don't have a love of money, but I do have a love of people and I know what money can do to help the world. And that's what I know I would do with the money.'cause it's what I do with the little money I have now,
Jim:Right. And it's not, it's not as though. You're having money, was taking it away from someone else.
Pjae:That's the other part. I'm glad you brought that up. Cause that's another thing that we believe, that there's only, that money or abundance is a pie. Which makes it finite. It's not, it's like a river. It's like the ocean. It's flowing all the time. In and out, in and out, in and out. So you don't have to hold onto it. It flows in and you let it go out to do the, to do the work you want it to do and let it flow back in and flow back out. That's how money actually works. So the idea that if it's a pie and it's finite, then I gotta get all of mine. There's not enough for you. That's not, I can't share with you because then mine would be gone. That is not a true, that's not a true statement. That's not a true universal principle. The universal principle is there is plenty. For all and I truly believe that if everybody wasn't just hanging on to money and just leaving their bank and saying I got I Got to have it for them for the 20 years of her 20 centuries of grandkids. I'm gonna have whatever they thinking There's there's I believe there's plenty for everyone on this planet if we weren't afraid and hanging on to it He's not letting you go out.
Jim:And so the other side of the topic is values. How do those differ from beliefs?
Pjae:So, so, so our values are the moral codes and that's why it's important to understand what you believe. Our values are the moral codes that we, that come from, from what we believe is true. So, Back to prosperity, if I believe that there is not enough, then what I'm going to value, or if I believe that, that, that I'm sorry, not that there's not enough, I know there's enough. If I believe that, that money is the root of all evil, then what I'm going to value is being poor. Giving it away because I'm not, I'm not going to be somebody that's going to hang on to money. I'm not that person. I value not having that. So I'm just going to be poor my whole life letting it go. That's how that's what values do. So when you look at, let me just say what, what one of my high values are, and I talk about this all the time You, you, we have lots of values. But what I, what I, what I ask people to do is to think about what are your top five? Because if you think about what your top five values are, then that's easy. That's like a roadmap for how you want to show up in the world every day. And whatever it is that you value, that is how you, that's how you're going to take action from that value. So if my high value that I have is that I believe courage. That it takes courage to to live a great life. That's a value for me. Then what happens is when I'm out in the world. I See something I say something and it's not about seeing something bad or whatever It's just I have to have the courage to step into something. That's not nest that doesn't look like it's my business but I think that That as a human being that we we have the right to love each other to touch each other's lives by noticing each other. So I have the courage to say to someone, Oh, I see you, whatever that, whatever I'm saying to them that says, I see you, I see you, you, you matter to me, you matter to the world, but you have the courage to think that you have the right to say that to someone. And I've done it. I that's, that's how I live. That's how I live because it's important to me to let people know everyone. that I meet, that they matter, that everybody matters. Um, yeah.
Jim:You can also take courage just to, to live in the world as your authentic self.
Pjae:As all my stars. Yes. Yes. Whatever that looks like. We, we, you know, we have all of these visions magazines and, and books and everything, everyone and everything telling you what to do. This is what things are supposed to look like. This is what a hero looks like, or this is what a pretty woman looks like, or this is what a good guy looks like, or whatever it is. But we, we, we have the right to, to say what that means for us, what, what, what it means to me to be a beautiful woman. And to me, it's more than just the looks, the, the, the physical looks. To be a beautiful woman means to be someone who Who, who loves unconditionally, that's, that's beautiful. That loves everything and everyone unconditionally, that is a beautiful thing. And I want to be around beautiful people like that. So, so we get to decide what that, what it means. What does any of this stuff mean? What do you believe in? What do you value? What is, what the courage it takes to live your life out loud? That's, to me, that's what authentic means. It means living your life out loud, unashamed. There's nothing to be ashamed of because you are who you are and you are a beautiful human being. Period. Even if we look down on ourselves. Physically, completely differently. Even if we value different things, that's okay, because that's what makes the world a great place. All these different ways in which we view life and showing up authentically, to have the courage to do that and think that you have the right to be that, to be who you are, which I think we're doing more and more of in this world right now.
Jim:Yeah. I really do. And I, I see, this may be the same thing, but I see here in the notes about the value of exploring what you believe in.
Pjae:Exactly. So that's, that's back to questioning. And this, this really hit, this really hit home for me when I I was married for a long time, and we decided that we, we were, it wasn't, it was no longer working. And so to be someone who has been in a relationship for a long time, and now you're a single person, and now, who am I? That whole, and it wasn't, you know, it just, I was living in the world as a married person. And now I'm no longer that. So now all these questions came to me like, okay, well, who are you? If you're no longer, what is it you want to do? And there are so many things that I never explored because I was a married woman because I felt like I needed my idea, my belief about what a wife does came from My parents and not that they said anything. It's what they did. It's what I saw It's what I saw, you know was growing up that what women did to support their families and their husbands and their children And so I did a number of those things, but now that I'm no longer married now I have a whole other life that's that's available to me It was I'd always was but because of my beliefs they weren't now. I'm looking at thinking. Why did you think that? Why did you think that in order to stay married, you couldn't go down this avenue? You couldn't be a minister? I never, I never, I actually said to myself, no, no, can't be two of us. Only one of us can be one and I'm going to be here to support. Who said that? My husband never said that.
Jim:Right. Who
Pjae:said that?
Jim:Exactly the sort of thing I was talking about. It just comes with the culture that you were brought up in or whatever. Exactly. Not even Aware that you believe it.
Pjae:Generally not until something is not quite going right. Then you think, what is happening here? And you begin to, it doesn't have to be that way. You can just consciously decide to ask yourself, why is that true? That is a powerful question to ask yourself. When you hear yourself saying something, whatever it may be, you can just stop and go, well, why is that true? What makes me think that's true? It may have been true at one point. Things change. Now, obviously, we grow, we get older, we, whatever from 10 to 20 to 30 to 40, things are different. So, it may have been true at one point, but is it still true now?
Jim:And it might be,
Pjae:and it very well could be, you know, I'm not, you're not looking to make sure to say that everything is, is, is wrong or, or it's time to change things. You're just making sure, yes, this is still good with me. Yes, I actually do believe that. That is, that was something my parents told me, but I believe it as well. My experiences have told me this works for me. And that's all we're doing. That gives you freedom in your life to know that you're living the life you're choosing, not not on automatic pilot because of, of, of what you've learned and, and didn't even realize you're living that way. So it just opens up a whole new life for you. Just asking those questions. Why do I believe this is true?
Jim:Okay. Yeah. Excellent. A good place to stop for today. Thank you all for being here. Absolutely. And we'll see you next time.
Pjae:Thank you all for joining us.