Transform Your Future with Eddie Isin

Stress Relief: The Four-Part Brain Model featuring Liam Naden

Eddie Isin Season 1 Episode 18

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Episode Summary: In this episode, Eddie Isin interviews Liam Naden, an author, coach, and host of the "Let Yourself Off the Hook" podcast. Liam shares his transformative journey from being a successful entrepreneur to losing everything, and how this led to his development of a unique coaching program. Central to his approach is the four-part brain model, which provides insights into managing stress and achieving success.

Timecodes:

  • [00:00:00] Introduction
    • Eddie introduces the episode and guest, Liam Naden.
    • Brief overview of Liam's background and his journey from success to homelessness.
  • [00:01:18] Accepting Uncertainty
    • Liam explains the importance of accepting that you don't know all the answers.
    • Discusses how stress, worry, and anxiety activate the survival brain and limit your creative brain.
  • [00:02:37] Introduction to Liam Naden
    • Eddie provides more detail about Liam’s background, his podcast, and his unique coaching program.
  • [00:04:32] Why We Get the Results in Our Lives
    • Liam delves into why we experience the results we do in life, both good and bad.
    • He shares his personal story of pursuing success through traditional methods and the unexpected catastrophe that changed his perspective.
  • [00:11:49] The Turning Point: From Success to Homelessness
    • Liam discusses his shift in life perspective after losing everything.
    • Highlights how his life changed when he stopped chasing success and allowed things to fall into place.
  • [00:16:11] The Role of the Brain in Stress and Success
    • Introduction to the four parts of the brain: Rational Thinking Brain, Emotional Feeling Brain, Survival Brain, and Creative Brain.
    • Importance of the creative brain and how managing stress can activate it.
  • [00:23:53] Practical Techniques for Stress Relief
    • Liam explains how to switch off the survival brain and activate the creative brain.
    • Provides practical techniques to manage stress and improve overall well-being.
  • [00:32:04] Real-Life Applications
    • Practical advice on applying the four-part brain model in everyday life.
    • Examples of taking intuitive steps and trusting the creative brain for better outcomes.
  • [00:45:19] Building a Stress-Free Life
    • Discussion on structuring a life that supports stress relief and creativity.
    • Insights on living a fulfilling life by following natural abilities and interests.
  • [00:55:33] Handling Relationship Stress and Divorce
    • Liam shares his experiences with divorce and how to manage fear in relationships.
    • Tips on improving relationships by avoiding fear-driven actions and decisions.
  • [01:03:18] Conclusion and Final Thoughts

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It's so important to realize that when you actually accept that you don't know the answer to something, what actually happens on a biological level is you actually activate a different part of your brain. Because when you are trying to figure out the answer to something, what state are you in? What emotional state are you in? You are in a state of stress, worry, fear, anxiety, frustration. You're trying to figure all this stuff out. I've got to come up with an answer. I've got to know what do I want? What should my goals be? How do I get there? How do I reach? How do I achieve more success? What do I need to do? And when All of these things or when I say when your brain is in a state of frustration, fear, worry, anxiety, and stress, what you don't realize is on a biological level, you have activated a very limited part of your brain and you've shut down the part of your brain that I call your created brain, which is the part of your brain that actually determines you get in your life. Hello all, and welcome to another episode of Transform Your Future with me, Eddie Isin, where I sit down with entrepreneurs, thought leaders, and high achievers as they identify areas I can improve on and guide me to further my self-improvement practice. For more information and insights, join the newsletter@transformyourfuture.com, where I write about reinvention, personal growth, and identity. We want to hear from you. Let us know how we can improve your experience. Please reach out to me through the website, your podcast app, comments, or just text me directly at 813-722-1417. Today's guest is Liam Naden. He's an author, coach, and the host of the Let Yourself Off the Hook podcast. Liam shares insights from his personal journey of losing everything and rebuilding his life, which led to the development of his unique coaching program focused on achieving success without struggle. I was interested in talking with Liam because of his Millionaire to homeless story, but also because of his four-part brain model and brain rebalancing method, which are based on scientific research and his own experiences. The four parts of the brain he identifies are, one, the rational thinking brain, responsible for gathering and storing information from our experiences. Two, the emotional feeling brain, which manages our emotions and feelings. Three, the survival brain, which handles our basic survival functions and the fight or flight response. And four, the creative brain that's central part of the brain, responsible for creativity, intuition, problem solving, and achieving peak performance. Now, Liam emphasizes the importance of eliminating fear, stress, and worry, which activate their survival brain and shut down the creative brain. By learning to manage these negative emotions, individuals can access their creative brain leading to greater success and life fulfillment. He explains that the brain is designed to ensure our survival by achieving homeostasis, a state of optimal functioning that includes physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing. Instead of focusing on long-term goals, Liam advocates for taking immediate intuitive steps. He believes that the brain will naturally guide individuals towards their best life when they trust and follow their creative impulses. We spoke at length also about failures and setbacks, which Liam reframes as opportunities for growth. He encourages viewing difficult experiences as towards becoming the best version of ourselves. His process of realigning brain functions, letting go of unnecessary struggles and allowing our natural abilities to lead us to success was inspiring and a fresh perspective on self-improvement. Enjoy the lesson. Okay. So Liam, where would you like to begin? I've got a lot of questions I want to ask you. I'm very interested in your program. Why don't you just start me off there and we'll dive right in. Well, I guess the place to start is probably the question everybody has on their mind pretty well all of the time, which is, how do I get better results in my life? And there's a side question to that. What's going on? Why am I getting the results that I'm getting in my life? Good and bad? Why does good stuff happen? Why does bad stuff happen? Is it because of all the effort I put in? Is it because I'm setting goals, is because maybe it's because of some luck or coincidence that I'm where I am? So all of these questions, these have been my burning passion to find the answers to. And the interesting thing is I only really found out the answers to these by accident through a catastrophe that happened in my life because I was always the sort of person studying success, going to seminars, workshops, having all my goals, working tremendously hard. I set up my own businesses and I was incredibly driven and motivated, and I Really do everything I could to be more and more successful. But in my mid forties, something happened that was never on a goals list, should never have happened to this expert on success that I was, and that was, I lost everything, went from millionaire to homeless virtually overnight. So I had to learn that lesson to figure out the answer to what really creates the results in my life. And that's what I share with people now is by understanding that it's not what you think it is. We've all been led down this path about the control we have over our life, but none of it's true. And when you really think about it, you have to accept that there's something else going on. So there's something else that's going on. That's what we need to figure out because that's what's really creating the results in our life. Yes, absolutely. And it's always through those challenges, it's always through those. When you think it's the end of the world and everything's terrible and I can't believe this is happening to me again or whatever, that's when you end up finding the breakthrough, it always comes through that adversity. Yeah, well, it very often does, but what I've learned about the brain in particular and about how we are designed is it doesn't have to be that way. But if we don't learn the lessons early enough, in other words, if we don't manage ourselves and our brain the way it's supposed to be used, we are going to get caught out eventually, and we are going to get the wake up call to be told, you're doing it wrong. You haven't got the message. You've been trying and not really succeeding, and you're all stressed and you've had all these problems in your life, but you still haven't got the message. So I'm going to deliver you something really bad, really big, so that you finally get the message. And that's what that's all about. And that's certainly what happened for me. Yeah, so I'm identifying what you're saying. It's like I can't control the world, I can't control the universe, I can't control other people, but the one thing that I can control is I can learn how to control my own mind. So talk about some examples of this in action, your method. Well, what it really comes down to, I suppose one of the biggest examples was from my own life because as I say, I went from being a multimillionaire and having all of the success in life, if you like, multiple businesses, multiple homes had a lifestyle that many people would say was really good and enviable if you like. But the thing about that lifestyle, the way it was, it was full of stress and problems. And I read books, I'm sure, and I heard all these people say to me, Liam, stress problems, overcoming obstacles. This is all a natural part of success. This is the price that you have to pay if you want to be successful. And problems are good. Obstacles are good because they make you stronger. They help you overcome your challenges, they help you grow. You have to learn to accept that your life is always going to have problems and stress if you want to have the rewards of this great life. So I actually bought into that. Now, I've subsequently come to understand that none of that is true, that we are not designed to have problems biologically, we're not naturally designed to have stress and problems in our life and they don't actually help us. All that stress and problems actually do is they shorten our life, they make us more, they put strain on our body and they damage us and shorten our life that a lot of scientific research has proven that to be absolutely true. But I used to think that, but it was only after I became homeless and I changed my approach that my life turned out in quite a different way. And why I say it turned out in a different way was because before I'd been chasing after success, I'd always been saying to myself, what's the next goal? What's the next information I need to learn? What's the next book I need to read? What's the next seminars? Always doing all of this stuff, trying harder, trying to be motivated and being motivated and being a massive action taker. But I was always pushing and chasing after success. But after I lost everything and changed my approach in a weird sort of way, what happened was it felt like success was actually chasing after me because instead of the struggle, instead of the trying to figure it out, things were falling into place. And it sounds, it's a bit hard to describe, but I was starting to make money again, set up new businesses, starting to do amazing things. Like I sailed around Europe for eight years, living full-time on my yacht, traveling to 15 countries, running my businesses at the same time. I've been a nomad for 14 years running my businesses. Currently we're living in a motor home and speaking to you from France, we were just traveling around, but things were falling into place rather than me pushing. So it would be like someone would show up in my life with exactly the right information or the right opportunity or the right idea or the right help to help me along, or some circumstance would come along and it would all work really well, or I'd get an idea whether it's a solution to something I'd been working on or just a new idea, a new creative idea, or I'd see a new opportunity that I hadn't noticed before. And it felt like what has been described as being in the flow of life, being in the zone, and we've all had that experience where things are going well and we know things are going well, and we're putting an effort, but it's not a struggle. So that was the transformation and that's the way my life still is, and that's why I decided I was going to figure out what I was doing differently because there was something, I didn't know what it was. I'd studied all this other stuff, meditation and law of attraction and goal setting and reprogramming your subconscious mind, changing your beliefs or using your mind differently. I'd studied all of that stuff, but I still ended up homeless and with nothing but this way, it seemed like nothing to do with that. And I said to myself, firstly, I'm going to discover what I'm doing differently because for two reasons. One is I want to make sure I keep doing it because this is working really well and I don't have the stress and problems that I used to have. So that's the first thing. And the second thing I said, and if I figure this out, I'm going to share this with everyone. I know everyone who could possibly benefit from this because what I've seen all around me is people who are struggling, stressed, who want the best out of their life, but it doesn't matter what happens, they never managed to overcome this stress struggle and the feeling that there's something more that they're not reaching their full potential. I want to show how the people how to do that, and that's what I do. You were a serial entrepreneur, you had 18 separate businesses at the time, or that's now. Well, that's all together over my lifetime, if you like. Okay. Yeah. Okay. And so you were in the zone of getting things done and you were stressed because of timelines and other people and managing the whole thing. What was the nce after everything for you? What was it that you had to ask yourself to move forward? What were some of the questions you asked yourself? Well, there were actually two questions that I continued to ask myself as I lay asleep or tried to sleep on the sofa in the living room of my elderly mother's small apartment, which is where I ended up living. I had to move back in with her. There were two questions I kept asking myself when I had nothing where I'd lost everything. And these were pivotal questions, and more importantly than the questions were, the answers that I came up with were absolutely transformational in my life, and I'm sure will be transformational for others too. But the first question is, or was, why has this happened to me? Why has this happened to me? I'm the expert on, I know about motivation and setting goals and how to use my mind and make sure I don't, this was not on my goals list. So how has this happened? Why has this happened to me? That was the first question. The second question was, what do I do now? Because I didn't know I was in a town where I knew nobody. I'd lost everything, all my businesses or my connections, everything. And so those two questions, why has this happened to me and what do I do now? What was really interesting about the answer, the answers to both of those questions was the same. And that answer is, I don't know. I don't know why this has happened to me and I don't know what to do now. And it's so important to realize that when you actually accept that you don't know the answer to something, what actually happens on a biological level is you actually activate a different part of your brain. Because when you are trying to figure out the answer to something, what state are you in? What emotional state are you in? You are in a state of stress, worry, fear, anxiety, frustration. You're trying to figure all this stuff out. I've got to come up with an answer. I've got to know what do I want? What should my goals be? How do I get there? How do I reach? How do I achieve more success? What do I need to do? And when all of these things, or when I say when your brain is in a state of frustration, fear, worry, anxiety and stress, what you don't realize is on a biological level, you have activated a very limited part of your brain and you've shut down the part of your brain that I call your created brain, which is the part of your brain that actually determines you get in your life. So what I did was I released all of that state of frustration and I gave up, and it wasn't so much giving up as in saying, well, I'm going to go and sit under a rock and that'll be the rest of my life. It was realizing I didn't know, and I just had to accept whatever came along, and that's when my brain could kick into this other gear. And we can talk about what these different states or these different parts of your brain are, because this is biology. I'm not talking about something to do with your subconscious or some eerie fairy idea. This is a physical, biological survival mechanism that we have inbuilt in the human brain in which every living thing has exactly the same inbuilt mechanism, other animals and other creatures. So this is pure biology, it's the biology of survival, but it's only when you realize that or when you stop activating this limited part of your brain that you can actually move forward in your life. And that's exactly what happened to me. Interesting. I identify greatly. There's part of me that's the creative part, that's the part that I love about myself, that's my talent and my gift is to be creative and to be able to communicate effectively and to be able to sell ideas and influence people with certainty. But when you're in the stress mode where you're worried and concern and you feel like you're back against the wall, that somebody pulled the rug out from under you, you don't get in touch with that anymore. You lose in touch with that talent and skill, and you're now caught in that compulsive obsessive worrying mode where the committee is talking to you and saying all kinds of negative shit. So I identify. I call it your creative brain, but it's a lot more than your creativity. We can talk about what it is. It's a lot more than being creative versus not being creative. That's not really what I'm, to clarify, we'll talk about more about that, what this creative brain actually is, because people say, oh, I can't be creative or I'm not creative. You are creative in different ways. We're not just talking about this inspirational thing. but we can get into that. Yeah. So yeah, creative problem solving those types of ideas. Right. Would it be useful to talk about the four parts of the brain and get a bit of clarity on how we actually operate? Yes. Well, here's the funny thing about who we are and how life works. And when you think about it, we're all barreling along trying to think, we are in control of our life or we're making the best of our life, but what control do we have over nature? When you really think about it, there are laws of nature that override absolutely everything. So for instance, the law of gravity, you can stand on a 10 story building and say, you can pray, you can be motivated. You can read every book on changing your beliefs and changing your subconscious mind and convince yourself that when you walk off that building, you're going to fly up in the air. But it doesn't matter what you do. It doesn't matter how much effort you put in, it's not going to happen. The law of gravity is going to take over. And there is actually a law that governs success, a biological law, and it overrides, it controls every living thing, and it overrides anything else that we might try and think about. And it's the law of survival. And if you were to ask any biological scientists, what is the purpose of life? All life has one overriding principle, purpose and wiring, and that is to survive. That's the primary biological purpose of every living thing. And everything is geared and designed around making sure that happens above anything else. So what that really means, of course, is that when something has the greatest chance for survival, it's when it's being the best it can be. And science has a word for this called homeostasis, which means the optimum functioning of the organism and whatever organism it is, whatever living thing it is, when it's functioning at its best, it has its greatest chance for survival. So it's literally designed to achieve that state so that it has the greatest chance for survival. Now, that doesn't just mean physically being its best for humans because when we are at our best, it doesn't, as I say, just mean when our body's functioning perfectly. It's also when we're our happiest, when we're our most inspired, when we are feeling great, when we're feeling excited about life. So when we are mentally, emotionally, and spiritually our best, that gives us the greatest chance for survival, and that means being our happiest. It means doing all the things that make us feel great. It's not dealing with problems. So our biological purpose is to be the best that we can be, which means to be happy, fulfilled, operating in a healthier body as possible so that we have the greatest chance for survival. And nature has actually provided a mechanism, a machine, something designed to ensure that that happens. In other words, nature has provided every living thing with a mechanism to make it the best it can be, including us. And what is that? It's a brain. All the brain is a biological machine designed to ensure that that organism that it belongs to has the greatest chance for survival by being the best that it can be. So here we all are with this machine that does have one purpose to make us the best that we can be. So why aren't we feel? Why do we have problems and stress? Why are we so unfulfilled unhappy? Why do we feel that life isn't going the way we want it to? Why do we have all these problems in our life? There can only be one reason, and that is because it's a machine. The only reason a machine doesn't work do the job it's designed to is it's not being used the right way. If you have a motor car, it's a very simple machine that has a very simple purpose to get you from where you are to where you want to go. But if you're not going to drive it right, it's not going to do it. If you've got your foot on the accelerator and the handbrake the same time you've put the wrong fuel in and you haven't turned the engine on because you don't know that that's what you're supposed to do to get it to work right? It doesn't matter how motivated you are. I mean, you could get out from behind the car and try and push it along. It's still not going to make any difference. All you're going to do is get frustrated, tired, and exhausted, and you probably blame yourself and say, well, I'm not strong enough. I'm not motivated enough. I am not determined enough. I don't believe so. It's still not going to make any difference. Whereas well, the machine works in a particular way, you do this, you do this, you do that, and it all works perfectly. There's no struggle involved. That's how your brain works. So it's really crucial to realize this because most of us are out there trying to force things to happen. We're trying to go against, it's a bit like saying, I'm going to try and stop breathing. Now we know how successful we're going to be on that. I'm going to try and stop my heart beating. It's a pointless exercise. It doesn't do you any good. And it's the same with your brain. If you don't use it the right way, which purely comes from understanding or not understanding, you're just not going to get the right results. It's as simple as that. Yeah, I think that one of my sayings that I tell people when I'm coaching them working with them is that I believe that anything is possible. That you can achieve anything that you like regardless of your age, regardless of your circumstances, as long as it's within the laws of gravity and physics, right? You're not going to suddenly be seven feet tall and be able to join the NBA. It's not going to magically happen. You're not going to float tomorrow. You're not going to just wake up and float out of the bed. You have to step on the ground. So it's interesting that you brought that up. Well, here's another way of. Yeah, please, please. I'm. Sorry to interrupt you. Go ahead. Instead, instead of saying you can achieve anything that you want, how about playing with the concept that you don't know what you want? You don't know what is best for you. And the reason you don't know is because the part of your brain that you are using to try and figure out or understand what you want is not the part that knows the answer to those questions. There is another part of your brain that knows all of the answers to your questions, is it knows exactly what you need. It knows exactly what you need to be the best that you can be. Have the best life possible, be the happiest that you can, which is what you really want. It knows all of that. But here's the thing, it doesn't need to tell you. It doesn't need to show you, but you will find out if you allow it to do its job. Because how many of us have ended up in a place, and I've worked with many people in this situation, they try and figure out what they want and they say, yes, I really want this. And they end up somewhere completely different in their later and say, Liam, you won't believe what I'm doing. I would never have dreamt that I would be doing this, and I would never have dreamt how amazing my life is. I would never have dreamt that I'd be sailing around the world visiting 15 countries on my own yacht for eight years. If someone would told me that's what I was going to be doing, I would've said they were crazy. So the thing is, we don't actually know, and we certainly don't know when we're using the wrong part of our brain, which is what 99% of people are doing 99% of the time, which is why firstly, we're all staying confused, and secondly, we're not achieving what we really need and want to be our best. That's how it works. So are you saying that there is a part of your brain that has the answers that you can tap into? Absolutely Pep. I could give you an illustration of the Yes, please. And see what they are. So what I've created as a model of how the brain operates, and this is a biological mechanical model, so it's nothing to do with sort of airy fairy ideas like subconscious. These are four separate biological places within your brain that each have a separate function biologically, and they're all to do with your survival and you being the best that you can be, which is why you are here and how you're designed. The first part is what I call the rational thinking brain. And that's at the top of your head. That's your neocortex if you like. Now, the purpose of your rational thinking brain is to gather all of the information that you pick up in every moment in your life through your five senses in your thoughts, and store it there. So this is like a library or a database of your knowledge, what you've learned in your life, that's your rational thinking brain. The second part of your brain, which is located just below that, and there are several scientific names for these. There's two or three places here. One's the amygdala, the hippocampus, the hypothalamus. This is what I call your emotional feeling brain. And this is responsible for how you feel, obviously your emotions. The third part of your brain located at the back of your head around the brainstem is what I call your survival brain and your survival brain. Again, it's pretty obvious what this does. This manages your moment by moment survival. So everything you need to do, everything that needs to happen for you to stay physically alive without you having to think about it, obviously this is managed by your survival brain. So this manages all your heartbeat, your organs, all of the physical functions. And there's one other thing that's managed by your survival brain, and that is how you protect yourself from a threat or danger, something that can physically harm or even kill you. Because if you think back to when the brain was first formed millions of years ago, it was a pretty dangerous world where humans lived then. There were lions behind every rock. So we had to develop a mechanism to deal with unexpected threats and dangers to things that could kill us. And sometimes we call this the fight flight response, but what it is, it's an automatic reaction that when your brain sees a threat, you automatically kick in. So if a lion was coming towards you, you'd react without thinking, without even knowing what you were doing. You would react, you would run away or you would shout for help or you'd fight it or prepare to fight. And your whole body would change, your whole metabolism, your physiology would change to deal with this threat to your survival. So that's a really important part of our survival, if you like. And this is all managed not with your thoughts, but with the automatic functioning of your survival brain. So that's all good. They're the three parts so far, but there's a fourth part, and that's what I mentioned right at the beginning, your creative brain and your creative brain, which is located right in the very center of your skull. It's been described by religious and spiritual traditions science very recently is starting to identify, recognize, and describe and understand that this is a separate part of the brain physically and biologically, and what your creative brain is. This is the master. This is the part of your brain that is designed to be in charge to make sure that everything happens in your life, to make you the best that you can be. So yes, this manages your creativity. This is where you get creative ideas from. This is where you get your problem solving from. This is where your intuition do we ever have. Remember we have those gut feelings. We think this, we sometimes call it the little voice inside telling us we should do something or that we shouldn't do something. And quite often we ignore it, we override it and say, oh, I'm not going to do that. That sounds too scary. Or I'll make what I think work. I'm not going to listen to that voice. And it's always wrong when we do that. So all of our problem solving our creativity, this is our imagination, our intuition, this is where our peak performance state comes from, our motivation, our energy, our true energy. And it's being described as being in the flow, being in the zone. Many peak performers have come up with different ways of describing this particular state, and they all acknowledge that there's something else beyond their own effort and their own thinking that is bringing them more information or new ideas, musicians and composers. It's fascinating asking a songwriter, how did you write that song? And I've seen quite a few interviews with songwriters and even earlier back classical composers have described where they got the music from and they all say when you ask them, where did the music come from? They go, I don't know. It just came to me. I dunno where it came from. So it didn't come from the sitting down trying to figure it all out and struggle and work it all out. This is this creative brain at work. And this also, when you use this part of your brain, your awareness expands. And where is previously you might look at something and say, well, that's a bit of luck. Where did that come from? Oh, it's just luck. Well, that's a coincidence. You start to realize that this machine, your brain, which has actually got the power, it's the most powerful supercomputer on the planet. Remember, it's only got one job to make your life the best that you can be so that you have the greatest chance for survival. That's what it's designed for. You start to realize this is your brain at work. It's not luck, it's not coincidence. It's not the right people coming into your life at the right time by fluke. It's not the most significant things that happen to you in your life by accident. This is your brain at work. And this is the way it's designed to be because we've always, excuse me, we've all experienced moments where things are going well in our life, things are falling into place, everything's working, we're making the right decisions and things are going well. That's being in our natural creative state that is being the best that we can be. And the real point is that's our natural state. That's the way we are designed. Nature science is a word for the state home stasis, the perfect functioning of the organism. That's the way we're supposed to be because that's the state that gives us the greatest chance for survival biologically. However, there's only one time we're not supposed to be like that. So just picture this, your natural biological state. And if you look in the rest of nature, you'll see they automatically do this. We are the only ones who don't. But your natural biological state is to live in this homeostasis where everything is functioning well. You are being the best that you can be, and your brain is making sure that everything happens physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally to give you the greatest chance for survival. But there's only one time when you're not supposed to be in this expanded, super productive, super fulfilled state. And that is when a lion jumps out from behind a rock, when you are presented with a threat or danger, when something comes unexpectedly into your environment, it could harm or even kill you. And what happens on a biological level is that your brain activates what we talked about before, that fight flight response, that survival state of what to do. And at exactly the same time, it shuts down the creative brain, it shuts that all of those things down. Now does that for several reasons. One is because all of the energy that is being used physically in that part of your brain, because your brain uses an enormous amount of energy, 30% of your body's energy is used up in your brain. So all of that energy is diverted into fighting off the danger because you're going to need, you may need as much energy as you can. You don't need that. That energy is wasted sitting in your creative brain if you're faced with an immediate threat. And the other reason is none of those tools, if you like, are useful when you are faced with a lion about to eat you, your imagination, creativity, feeling, good resource, none of that helps. So it could even hinder you from doing that. It might delay you from actually just reacting. So biologically, you shut down all of this good stuff to fight off a danger. So that's all good. But two questions or two important things to realize is firstly, what activates, what determines whether you are using this natural creative, expanded being in the flow state versus your reaction to a danger? How does your brain know the difference and what should you do about it? Your brain, what the way it signals to you is, or the way it activates either of those states is through your emotions. So literally what happens is when you feel good, when you feel loving, creative, imaginative, excited, you have good feelings, you have good chemicals in your brain and your body and you are activating your creative brain and all of those good resources are open to you. But when you feel fear, stress, worry, and anxiety, that's literally a biological signal from your brain to shut down your creative brain and activate your survival state. So what's the problem here? And I hope I'm explaining this. The problem is most of us, we are in the state of stress, fear, worry, anxiety, and we are trying to figure out what to do with our life. We're not faced with a lion about to eat us. We are worried about our future. We're stressed about our problems. We see all these problems in our life and all these problems in our world, and we're confused and we're trying to figure it out and we say, I dunno what I want. What should my goals be? What should I do? What information do I need to learn? Where can I get some more information? What can I do to make something happen? And we're stuck in a brain state where none of the resources, none of the answers are there. That's not what it's designed for. It's only designed to fight off a danger. All of the answers are in your creative brain, but we can't access those. This is why when we're stuck with a problem, we can't solve it. Often someone else has to come along to us and say, this is the answer to your problem. You'll go, well, I can't see it. It doesn't look right to me. And you can't see it because your brain won't show it to you, can't show you the real answer. So we have to learn away to realize, we have to realize that this fear, anxiety, stress, worry, frustration, all we are doing when we're feeling that state, all that's happening is our brain is telling us there's something in your environment that's a threat to your survival. Now, of course, there isn't. That's what your brain's saying. And it's switching on your survival brain and it's shutting off your creative brain. So we need to find a way to stop activating this fear allow our creative brain to work. And ultimately, when you do that, that's the only game in town. That's the only thing you need to do. And your creative brain will do the rest. It will make sure you come up with the right goals, you do the right things, you avoid problems. You meet the right people, you come up the right information, you seek out the right information, it's going to make sure all of that happens. You make the choices in the right way. Because of that. It's more than a choice because unfortunately, we are not even aware of why we are activating this fear, stress, and worry state. Because people say to me, well, Liam, it's all real well for you. Are you saying All I need to do to solve my problems is to stop worrying about them and stop getting stressed. But that's why I'm trying to solve my problems is because they are making me stressed. They are making me worried. I can't just switch that off. Well, the truth is you can and you must. You'll never solve your problems. You'll only ever stay stuck until you learn how to switch off this fear mechanism. This is what I teach as people primarily how to do that. One way of explaining it is if someone, well, there's a couple of points here, but the first way is to explain that if I was to come to you and say, I want you to drink this glass of liquid, and you said, well, what is it? And I said, well, it's hydrochloric acid. And you said, what are you talking about? I understand what putting hydrochloric acid into my body, it's going to do to me, it's going to harm me. It's probably going to kill me. It's going to create all sorts of problems in my life. And I said to you, no, don't worry about it. If you believe, if you have faith, it won't harm you. In fact, it could even be good for you. If you believe strongly enough, it could make you stronger, it make you better. And you say, look, I'm sorry you don't seem to understand. Are you dumb or something? But you don't understand? No, it won't. I know that physically it doesn't matter what you say or what you want to believe physically, it's going to damage me. And then I'd try the stick that was the carrot. Then I'd try the stick and say, if you don't drink this, no one else is ever going to talk to you again for the rest of your life. You're going to lose everything. People will come and take everything you own, leave you homeless. All of your family and friends will disown you and they'll never want to talk to you. And some of your family are even going to kill themselves unless you drink this hydrochloric acid. And you're still going to say, it doesn't matter what the justification, it doesn't matter. What are the price I have to pay. I will lose everything. It doesn't matter because I know that the second I drink that doesn't matter what else happens, I'm going to be harmed or even killed. I'm going to die. That's what fear does. You have to get to the stage of understanding why. Realizing doesn't matter. The justification doesn't matter. The problems in your life doesn't matter. The problems in the world, if you allow them to activate your survival brain through fear, frustration, worry, anger, bitterness. If you allow that, you're shutting down your creative brain. So you are always going to stay stuck. And funnily enough, as I was researching all the science behind this and realizing this is pure biology, it's like the gravity. We can want it to be different or we think it should be different, but this is the way it works. And I thought, I've heard this somewhere before where I heard this, this thing about fear not being fear of something you should avoid. I thought that's funny. There's a book called the Bible and the Bible says 365 times someone counted three words. Be not afraid. Be not afraid. Now it's not saying be not afraid is try not to be afraid and try not to worry. It's an instruction. This is a biological instruction because it's telling you that when you feel fear and all of the associated emotions like worry, stress, anxiety, which are all based on fear. If you feel fear, you're activating the wrong part of your brain and the God-given part of your brain, which is trying to make your life give you the best life possible, you don't have access to those resources. It's all shut down. This is why it's making such a thing about be not afraid. And it also says, do not worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will take care of itself, which isn't about setting goals interestingly, is it. But anyway, and it also says, do not worry about what you shall eat, drink, and wear, because it will all be provided for you just like it is in the rest of nature. So you don't have to go and struggle and find it. It doesn't say, do not worry about what you shall eat, drink, and wear. But when you go out and work hard for it, then you'll get it. It doesn't say that it will be provided for you. And that's what this creative part of your brain will do for you. If you activate it, it's going to bring you all the good stuff. And most importantly, it's going to get you doing what you want to be doing and really are supposed to be doing to make you the best version of yourself, which is what you are here for. Yeah, I started on this journey because I met some people who were doing some things that I thought I couldn't do that was impossible for me to achieve. And because they can do it, I started to believe that I can do it. And they actually told me, you don't have to believe that you can do this. You just need to believe that we believe it. And so that was the beginning of my belief that in faith and not having the fear and just not thinking about the fear and doing just being, just being and letting it happen, that it was all going to work out. That was the foundation of my first big reinvention and change in my life. And now 36 years later, I mean I've done it many times, but this has always been my foundation, is that my spirituality, that there is a force for good in the universe, and I just need to plug into it so I get what you're saying on the different levels of how that ties into the biology of my brain. And when I said choices, what I meant was once you are not living in the fear and the anxiety and you get into the flow into that zone, you have to make the right choices. If you make wrong choices, you end up back in the other side of things. For me, things like having people in my life who appreciate me, not people who tolerate me. This is just a small example, doing things that I enjoy doing that are good for me, that feed my creativity and my energy, and I feel it. I'm in the flow. There's things that don't do that I don't want them in my life. So being able to have the freedom like you're talking about, to travel and enjoy life, we should all be able to do that in our lives. Why do we have to have a life? That's all or nothing, right? Why do we have to be living in stress and making a lot of money and doing all these things, or we have to be no money and live as a vaga. There's a way for us to handle all these things together if we get out of the fear and the worry and the stress and the pain and the expectations that other people put upon us, and be able to just allow ourselves to live in that creative area of our brain with creative problem solving and let it handle everything. I get that a hundred percent. I love it. I love it. It's great. One of the interesting things, so tell me when you live. Yes. Please go ahead. You live in the state. You realize you can never make a mistake. You can never do the wrong thing. It's always the right thing because what stops you from doing something is the fear of doing the wrong thing, isn't it? And when you feel the fear and you're worried, you ed the wrong part of your brain, but when you have no fear and no worry, you know that are going to make the right choice. You know it, don't believe it or hope or try and convince yourself. You absolutely know it and you know it from that. And when you know it, that's when your creator brain takes over and make sure it's all. Now, most of it's going to be unexpected stuff probably that happens to you. Doesn't mean everything's going to work out the way you think it should, probably won't, but it will always be perfect. And then we use this word trust. It's not really trust. It's understanding that that's how it works. I mean, when you drive down the road in your car, do you trust that cars are going to stay on their side of the road and not hit you, or you just know that they're not going to hit you? That's the way it works. You don't even have to think about it. You don't even consider it as an do you trust that the sun is going to rise tomorrow morning? You don't even consider it. And that's the point about when you get into the state of learning to use your creative brain as your primary driver, you don't even think about these things. You just know that it works. And the beautiful part is the more you do this, and this is what I teach people to really change a habit of how they're using their brain, which comes first from understanding how it works, then you create a new habit and you start to practice it. And you're not going to be perfect to start with any new habit, but you're going to do it right some of the time. And when you do, you're going to see things happen in your life and you're going to go, wow, how did that happen? That was unexpected. That's really good. How did I meet that person? How did I come up with that idea? How did this happen? And then you understand, ah, this is the natural flow of life. So what happens is you start to get an experience of this, which is very different to the old experience of pushing and worrying, trying to figure it out and make sure you do the right thing and analyze things before you do them. And you start to get more and more of this experience in your life. That's when it all starts to gather momentum, like a snowball. And all of a sudden you're living the way you are supposed to in this natural flow, the natural state of pure being the best that you can be. My first mentor, I was always wanting to negotiate with him and try to figure it out and get some kind of guarantee or something like that and try to understand everything in some higher level. It's complicated. And he used to say, you don't really have to understand everything. You just need to know that it works, right? It was like, do you know how electricity really works? Really? And I'm like, well, not really. I mean, I know you turn the light switch and light on. Exactly. That's all you need to know. When you do that, the lights go on. You don't have to understand the electricity, you don't Internal combustion engine, you just know you put your key in there, you turn it on, you put your foot in the gas to go, you put your foot in the brake to stop. That's it. It's not complicated that from a. You do need to get to a certain level of understanding. For instance, for electricity, you might not know exactly how it works, but you have an experience of it working and that's why you know that it works. And it's the same with your creative brain because you can do all this in theory, and this is the problem that I found with many people or me for most of my life. So I tried to work all this stuff out in theory, and it's like goal setting and changing your beliefs. And all of it sounds good in theory, but it doesn't really work in your practical experience, which is why you're always trying to force yourself to believe it and why you don't get the results. So you need a certain level of understanding to take knowing that that's the way it works and having an experience of it working rather than just some theoretical idea. Because then you stay in that area of faith and hope. And most of what we call faith is not faith. It's hope and thinking, well, if I keep repeating something to myself for long enough, I'll believe it. And that doesn't work either. One of the things I was thinking about is how you need to notice for all of this really to work. And part of what you're talking about has to do with awareness about noticing what you're noticing. And then once you start to notice, then you then start to recognize it more. That reticular activator kicks in and you start to recognize these things more in your life. It could be as simple as the other day, one of these things happened where I went to go get a haircut and they made me wait. I was supposed to be next, but then I ended up waiting 20 minutes and who walked in the door while I was waiting? The woman who I really wanted to cut my hair happened to walk in at that time. And I thought, see, this is great. This is what I really needed, and I was worried and getting worried about stuff, and I needed to let go because it was going to be given to me. And it's just a little example, and when you start noticing these things, you could tap more into that. I hear you a hundred percent. I wanted to just take a couple of seconds to talk about a few other things. I know that you had a couple of failed marriages, and I wondered if we could talk a little bit about divorce and what that was like. I know I went through a divorce. Divorce was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. Oh my God, it was very challenging. Tell me a little bit about how you handled divorce. Well, and it's interesting you mentioned that because you might know that I do a lot of marriage and relationship coaching as well, specifically around the area, helping people repair their relationship perhaps from the brink of divorce. And you know what the overriding, what's the word, principle or determinant as to whether you are successful in a relationship or not, doesn't matter what state of the relationship is, doesn't matter if it's ended and you are struggling through it through the divorce or it doesn't matter if it's on the verge of divorce or it doesn't, even if it's just an okay relationship or even a great relationship. The number one determinant of the quality of your life, including your relationship is how you relate to this word fear. Is there fear around what is going on in your life? In other words, if you are facing a divorce or if you're facing the end of your relationship, are you afraid of that? Are you worried about that? Are you stressed by that? If you are in a relationship and you're having lots of problems, do they cause you to feel fear, stress and worry? Because again, what I've found with relationship coaching is that when people are in a fearful state, stressed, worried again, they're not able to do the right things. They're not able to see the right things to do, so they stay stuck and they do all the wrong things. And we know what it's like in a relationship. When you are angry or stressed or frustrated, you end you end up lashing out and saying more of the wrong thing and making things worse. And it's not that you want to do that because you turn around and say, why did I say that? Why did I do that? You're using a part of your brain that is biologically programmed to make you do that, to make things worse, not to solve the problem. So yes, I've been through. Survival mechanism. Yeah, and fear keeps you in the wrong relationship for too long. It keeps you doing the wrong things that only make your relationship worse. So if you really want a great relationship, I've actually written a couple of books on this, and if anyone would like a free copy of my book, the Nine Habits of Great Relationships, just drop me a line through my website, liam naden.com and I'll email you a free copy. There are nine habits of great relationships that and that every other relationship doesn't have. And most of it revolves around this idea. Are you afraid for your relationship or you're just there feeling good? And if things don't work out, they don't work out. And if you're not worried about making mistakes, you're just there to have a good time. Now, you might think, well, that's unrealistic, but isn't that what you did early on in a relationship? Isn't that what you did when you first got together? You weren't afraid you was having a good time. You didn't have all this expectation and worry and stress thinking things were going to go wrong, and you'd bend up alone and alone and all those things. You didn't have fear and you didn't have it because, and you weren't activating that biological limited part. You were operating from your creative brain where everything was great, everything was wonderful. So I really encourage people wherever they are in their relationship to say, is there a fear here? Am I afraid about what might happen if this relationship does or doesn't work? Or am I afraid what might happen to me having gone through a divorce? Am I worried about the future? And deal with that and say, that's the hydrochloric acid. I've got to find a way to get rid of it. And I teach several ways to get rid of fear, because as I said earlier, people say they can't get rid of fear. Yes, you can. And yes, you must. If you want your life to move forward, and there's definite ways you can, that's what you need to focus on is saying, which part of my brain am I activating? I'm I activating the one that's going to help me move forward with my life, or the one that's keeping me stuck? That's what it comes down to. So I want to ask you a couple of questions, and then if you could just try to keep your answers brief, that would be really cool, only because I want to use this for your social media. My social media. So if somebody right now is listening to this and they're either going through a divorce or they're going to start a divorce, or their divorce is prevalent in their lives, what would you tell them from your experiences? I would say try not to be afraid. Try and figure out why you are afraid and to realize you've got this amazing brain that is going to make sure your life turns out for the best. Now, it might be something that you can't see, it probably will be. Maybe you are not designed to be in this relationship because there's a much better one coming along for you, but there is something much better coming along and all you need to do is learn to use trust. This part of your brain, it's biologically designed to make you all the good stuff happen. I went through two divorces. I lost everything separately. All of those things were pretty traumatic, but they turned out to be the best things that ever happened to me. They taught me about relationships. So I've helped so many people improve their relationship. They taught me about the brain that's helped me, enabled me to help so many people as well. So you don't know what gift you are being given. You just need to let go of the fear, realize that you've got to go through some tough times, but your brain has got your back. You'll be fine and your life will turn out better than you can ever possibly imagine. And we've talked a lot about fear. I think also there's another part of that that I'm sure you'll connect it to that and that is the beating yourself up thinking you're not good enough. I can't believe this happened. How did I let this happen? And being like, it's your fault and you are guilty or whatever. Yes, but where does all that come from? Why do you beat yourself up? Because you are afraid of the consequences. You are afraid that you're going to and criticize yourself and say, if only I tried harder, I was a failure, I gave up. Or you're going to think other people are going to criticize you. So it's a fear. Every negative emotion has its root and fear. So if you're beating yourself up and saying things like that, say, well, what am I afraid of? And realize you don't need to be afraid of any of those things. The only failure in life is not moving on when you should do. It's trying to hang onto something that's wrong and trying to force things. True. Success is allowing the power of your brain to guide you in the right direction and take the right action. And often those right actions, they're not the easy ones, but when they're the right ones, when you're using this part of your brain and right, I've just got to do this. I've just got to take that next step and I'm not going to worry about what people might think or whether I'm going to look back on my life and say, oh, I have all of these regrets. You're not going to have any regrets. You're not going to look, you're going to have an amazing life. It's just waiting around the corner once you get past all this fear stuff or is only holding you back. Yeah, I built a couple of some figure businesses and cashed out twice the last time. I didn't work for seven, eight years and traveled the world and found love and romance and happiness. But I was just thinking that in these failures that people have, people feel like right now, I'm sorry, let me just back up a second. I lost several million dollars in my process of doing things and people would say, oh my God, you lost$1 million, $2 million. Oh my God. Oh my God, that's terrible. I'm like, why? You actually haven't done anything in life if you haven't lost a couple of million if you really want to be successful. That's part of the process. That's how you get there, right? This was my attitude. So when you went through that process and you became living on your mother's couch, what kind of things were going through your mind that you talked to yourself to encourage? This is in process of trying to just encourage other people, other people who right now they have had some failures. They have tried some things. I was talking with a woman the other day who's afraid to move forward because she's tried different things and failed or she got involved in stuff and then never did anything afterwards. So what kind of encouragement would you give those people? Well, everything that happens to you, and you've really highlighted two things. One is somebody who uses failure to hold them back and another who uses failure to propel them forward. And the only difference is the way your brain, the meaning your brain gives to what has happened because you say you lost millions of dollars. What happened on a biological level before that you were stressed and worried and afraid about making money and you had to make more money because you really wanted to, and it caused you stress and pressure and your brain had this belief which was, if you don't make more money, and I know this, this is the belief I had. If you don't make more money, this is a threat to your survival. Unless you keep making more money somehow in your brain through your experience from childhood or wherever your brain has associated, not making more money with a threat to your survival, and that's what causes you fear and stress. Your brain is telling you, if you're not making more money, you are in danger of dying or being severely harm. But when you actually go through the process, when you lost all the millions of dollars, your brain created a new set of experiences and it realized it was nothing to be afraid of. It wasn't a threat to your survival. It's like when I ended up on my mother's couch, I was always afraid of two things, one, not being loved, and two, not having enough losing everything. As a result, what happened? I made some terrible relationship choices because I was afraid subconsciously of not being loved. Secondly, I made some terrible financial decisions, which ended up me losing everything and it kept me stressed. But when I experienced those two things, which I did when I was on my mother's couch, nobody loved me apart from my mother, and I had nothing my brain suddenly experienced that wasn't a threat to my survival and it could get rid of that fear. And that's what propels people on because it's their brain no longer puts you in that state of this could be a threat or a danger and keeps you stuck. It says, well, I've experienced that nothing to worry about. It's not a threat. Don't worry about it and activate your creative brain and you go into greater things. So if you find you are stuck with something that's happened to you, that's traumatic. All you need to do is track is reeducate your brain about what that experience was, and instead of being something that's terrible and whatever, you can see it as an opportunity. Someone used to say to me instead of saying, why is this happening to me? Say, why is this happening for me? What's the gift here? What can I do with this? If you have this traumatic experience, maybe you can help other people who go through that same traumatic experience in the future. Maybe you could help somebody even save their life. Imagine being the situation where someone reads your story and they say, you inspired me. If it wasn't for you, and you went through what I'm going through and you understand and you've really helped me, you've saved my life. That could be your gift to the world. That could be the reason you experience those things. And once you start to open yourself to those possibilities, your creative brain starts to work. You no longer stay stuck, and then the opportunities come, the good things happen, and you see things in the perspective of what they are, which is everything's perfect. It was designed for a purpose. A purpose to make you better, the best that you can be. It's all good. The other thing that I identify with you very much, Liam, is building the life that you want to live, right? Being able to structure your life in such a way that your routine, your daily routine, it supports the lifestyle that you want to live. And this is something that is very dear and near to my heart and I keep structuring my life to do those things. For example, like you're traveling right now in a motor home going through Europe, and you're in France right now. That's the lifestyle that you want to live to be able to be free from location to travel and enjoy life. And so you structured your whole life to do that. Talking about that to other people. When you talk to other people and tell them that they could do something like that, people find it very difficult. How could I do that? How could I live that life that I'm going to enjoy? What would you say to those people? Well, that's another very long topic, but essentially what you need to realize, if you are designed to be the best that you can be, what does that mean In every cell of your body, you have something called D-N-A-D-N-A is a blueprint for who you are. It contains 250 million pieces of information, which is an absolute blueprint for you being the best that you can be. And the point is several things. One is you don't know what those 250 million pieces of information are, but your created brain does. And your creative brain's purpose is to express that package of 250 million pieces of you in the best way possible to give that the greatest chance for survival. Because that's essentially what survives beyond you is your DNA on a biological level. So if you don't know what is best for you, but there's something else that does, you could never know what's best for you or what do you have to do? You just have to allow that part of your brain to do its job. So you say, I've structured and worked it out. I haven't worked anything out. All I do is take the next step because my creative brain, this is another function of how your biology works. It's the law of biological efficiency. Your biology and all of nature is designed to give you the maximum output with the minimum expenditure of energy because you don't know when you're not going to eat for a week. You need, your body is constantly trying to preserve your energy. So one of the ways it does that, one of the ways it gets you to be the best that you can be is it doesn't show you anything more than the various next thing that you need to do. It's not going to show you the goal 20 steps down. It's not going to show you you're going to be sailing on a yacht around the world or whatever. It's not going to be showing you what your ideal life, what your expression of the 250 million pieces is. It's not going to show you any of that. It's just going to show you the next step. Because if it showed you what your ideal life was and the 20 steps to get there, what are you going to do? You're going to sit down and you go, I dunno if I want that. I'm not, no, that sounds ridiculous. I could never do that. And all of these steps, how do I know they're going to work now if this one works, work, lead to the next and waste all of that time, all of that energy without doing anything. That's not the way your brain is designed to work. Obviously, it's logical when you think about it, isn't it? It's designed to show you, and I've spoken to multimillion, to billionaires who've explained that their philosophy in life, and it's mine as well, is get in tune with your creative brain in tune with what you love and just take the next step. Whatever it is, don't think about it. Don't try and plan. Don't try and figure out your life. Allow this incredible infinite supercomputer, which is your brain, to do its job and figure it out all for you, because it knows far more than you think. It knows all the answers, it knows what you want. And you would say, I'm sure, Eddie, that things in your life have turned out in a way you never expected them to happen, but they've been much better. That's the point. It's not about you trying to figure it out and coming up with plans and structuring it. So my life now, we just take the next step. We just say, where do we want to go today? I dunno. Well, we'll just go. We might have a rough idea. Like we were going to Denmark for the summer, we think, but we just know. And so many times, and this happened on the yacht and it happens in the motor home all the time. You think you're sailing in one direction, you've got to plan to get to a particular port. You assess the weather conditions, you say, that's right, you're out in the ocean. And then everything changes. Well, you can't just keep barreling along in the same direction. You have to change direction. And it's not up to you. The conditions have changed. So you just take the next step and then you end up somewhere different and you arrive in a port or in a place and you say, this doesn't feel like the right place. I don't enjoy being here. Oh, we'll just go somewhere else. I dunno where we'll just find somewhere else. And your life takes on that quality. Magic happens rather than you trying to force it. That's the way it is. Very good. Well, listen, I appreciate your time and coming on the show. I've asked you a lot of questions. We've talked a lot about your philosophy and your expertise. Is there anything that I haven't asked you that you'd like to talk. About? How many hours have we got left? I mean, a lot of these are very deep subjects, but I guess the key, the most important thing, message, I like to leave people listening, is to really realize there's a part of you that is, knows exactly what is best for you, and it has the power to bring it to you. But it's not through your thinking. It's not through your struggling and trying to figure stuff out, but your role, the only job you have to do is to say to yourself, what's resonating with me right now? What do I feel that I should do right now? And take that step. And maybe it's to visit my website to get a little plug for myself and say what Liam's saying, maybe something I need to learn about this. I'll go and check out his free webinar on his website. But whatever it is, don't have some great grand plan. And for goodness sake, don't worry or don't or realize that if you're worried about it, it comes from a fear place and that's not going to work. Just don't worry about it. Just do it and trust and see what shows up. And if you learn to live your life that way, which is nothing more than a different habit to what we've all been taught, then the magic shows up and you start to realize that yes, we are meant to be biologically successful, and there's a part of us that's designed to handle all that without us getting all stressed and worried. And we can do what Confucius said, who said, life is very simple, but we just insist on making it complicated. 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