In the 20th episode of Raw Minds, entitled "Unspoken Bonds: Navigating the Maze of Men's Relationships," hosts Erick and Joey embark on a profound exploration of the intricate network of relationships that play a crucial role in men's mental health. This episode, devoid of guests, allows for a more intimate and focused dialogue between the hosts as they dissect the dynamics of various kinds of relationships in a man's life.
Erick and Joey confront the silent challenges men often encounter when building and sustaining connections, whether it be with friends, romantic partners, family members, or colleagues. They tackle the stigmas surrounding male vulnerability and emotional expression, scrutinizing the societal norms that can hinder men from seeking support or fostering deeper bonds.
"Unspoken Bonds" is a candid and reflective episode that encourages men to navigate the complexities of their interpersonal relationships with courage and authenticity. The hosts share insights and personal anecdotes, shedding light on how these interactions can significantly impact a man's emotional and mental well-being.
Listeners are invited to join Erick and Joey on a journey to understand the subtleties of male relationships, the importance of open communication, and the ways in which men can cultivate a more supportive and understanding network. This episode is an essential listen for any man seeking to break down barriers and build stronger, more meaningful connections, as well as for anyone looking to gain a deeper understanding of the male psyche and its relational landscape.
In the 20th episode of Raw Minds, entitled "Unspoken Bonds: Navigating the Maze of Men's Relationships," hosts Erick and Joey embark on a profound exploration of the intricate network of relationships that play a crucial role in men's mental health. This episode, devoid of guests, allows for a more intimate and focused dialogue between the hosts as they dissect the dynamics of various kinds of relationships in a man's life.
Erick and Joey confront the silent challenges men often encounter when building and sustaining connections, whether it be with friends, romantic partners, family members, or colleagues. They tackle the stigmas surrounding male vulnerability and emotional expression, scrutinizing the societal norms that can hinder men from seeking support or fostering deeper bonds.
"Unspoken Bonds" is a candid and reflective episode that encourages men to navigate the complexities of their interpersonal relationships with courage and authenticity. The hosts share insights and personal anecdotes, shedding light on how these interactions can significantly impact a man's emotional and mental well-being.
Listeners are invited to join Erick and Joey on a journey to understand the subtleties of male relationships, the importance of open communication, and the ways in which men can cultivate a more supportive and understanding network. This episode is an essential listen for any man seeking to break down barriers and build stronger, more meaningful connections, as well as for anyone looking to gain a deeper understanding of the male psyche and its relational landscape.
ladies and gentlemen, welcome back. It is a brand new week with a brand new night. We are unedited, unfiltered, unsatisfied oh wait, my bad, that's my ex-girlfriends.
Speaker 2:And of course, we are always going raw my name is and I'm eric and we're your hosts and welcome to raw minds. I like that.
Speaker 1:That was funny yeah, buddy, I thought it was fitting for what we are going to discuss and what is that? Well, we are going to discuss relationships All types.
Speaker 2:All walks. You name it, we'll try to cover it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for you guys just tuning in, we are Raw Minds Podcast. We focus mainly on men's mental health. Hit us up Raw Mindscast at gmailcom. Myself and my co-host, eric, we have lived a life of pain and suffering and trauma and we are doing this show every week to hopefully touch people, help them, let them know that it gets better on the other side and that we are, or try to be, your guys' source or just someone you guys need to talk to. You know we've been through hell and back 10 times over, you know. So that's why we're here tonight, that's why we do this every week. And uh, yeah, thank you guys. If you're just new and tuning in, welcome to raw minds.
Speaker 2:buddy, I like that. How's your day?
Speaker 1:Day's all right, man, day's all right. You know, I know the beginning of the year I definitely took a couple punches to the face, but you know, that's life. That's what we all, you know, go through. We all deal with on different levels, no matter how good your life is or how good you think your life is, something's waiting around that corner. Something's waiting around that corner and it's gonna it's gonna be on your toes definitely but keeps you on your toes?
Speaker 1:definitely, but it keeps you on your toes and it's learning the tools on how to get up faster when these things happen in your life, right? So it's okay to take a knee when you get hit, but it's not okay to stay down, you've got to get up and you've got to keep moving. Yeah, you know days are going to up and you got to keep moving. Yeah, you know the days are going to come and go, regardless of what you're going through, regardless of how you feel.
Speaker 2:Yeah, definitely.
Speaker 1:And you, you got to push through these moments and and issues, or whatever it is that you guys are dealing with, uh, the best that you can so you can stay on that right path and keep leading in a positive direction. So, but you know, I took quite a few heavy shots to the head from life and you know, with everything that I've been through and the tools that I've learned, I learned to get up pretty quick and because of that, you know, I just landed a new position today for more money than I've made in the last couple years. So I'm grateful for that man.
Speaker 2:So it's all right man, today's all right.
Speaker 1:What about you, man? How's?
Speaker 2:my day was excellent. Actually, I had a great day killing it, making shit happen. I love my job, love it for my career, um, learning new things. I'm technically a concrete guy but I'm, uh, hopefully becoming a deficiency super. So I mean that's, it's exciting, getting to learn the back end of things. Very stressful, I'll tell you that, man. I mean very stressful, but I'm kicking ass, so that's all that matters. Right, pushing forward and having fun while we do it, man, you know you got to have fun. If you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong. You know, don't be afraid to say fuck this, this is not what I want to do. Follow what you want to do, man, because at the end of the day, when you're on your deathbed, you're going to look back and be like, fuck, I wish I did that, you know. So do what makes you happy and if you're not happy, fucking figure it out. And do what makes you happy. That's some of the best advice I can tell you.
Speaker 1:The one thing that you don't want to live with is regret.
Speaker 2:Definitely not man, Definitely not no.
Speaker 1:You know, I seen a study a while ago about they asked people that were on their last days before they passed away and what's the one thing that they wish they did in life that they didn't do, or or regrets that they had. One of the top answers was they didn't do what they wanted to do. They didn't take that class they really wanted to take, or they stay. You know, they didn't spend enough time with the family and they overworked themselves, you know, and a lot of us stay in those kind of jobs, thinking that that's the only option. And you've done it for a few years, like most people, and while I got to pay the bills and I'm already 40 years old and it's too late to change, and that's when you just exist. You'll never be fulfilled, you'll never feel happy, truly be happy.
Speaker 2:Well, that ties into relationships too. Man, you know what I mean, like friendships, the groups that you hung out with I wish I hung out with this. You, the groups that you hung out with I wish I hung out with this. You know, not this bad group or whatever. You know your life could have been different. It's in all aspects. You know, it really touches on you. Know, because you will be. You will be, I'm telling you, if you're having a slow, painful death, you'll be sitting on your bed like fuck. I wish I did that instead. Or travel, or travel, go travel. You know, fucking, see the world, do what you really want to do. You know, stop wasting your time, because time is the most precious thing in this world. You know, don't waste that shit.
Speaker 1:And don't wait for other people to do the things that you want exactly.
Speaker 1:You know a lot, a lot of you know I'm seeing it more these days but a lot of solo travelers. They always wanted to go to this country. They always want to do this, but nobody will ever go with them. So they're like, fuck it, I'm going anyways because that's what they want to do. Because if you waited, like, say, for traveling where I want to go, number one on my bucket list, probably most of my friends never even thought of going and probably wouldn't put in the effort to save the money to go with me.
Speaker 2:So if I oh, that's why you asked me to go on that Alaskan tour, kind of like that. Why? You asked me to go on that alaskan tour, kind of like that. No, I know that, but I mean it's like that's something too, that like fucking you know, uh, people don't want to do because oh think alaska cold. But I'm fucking down with that, with you, man, let's do it.
Speaker 1:I think it's a great idea well, I'm just saying in general about living your life. Right is if you spend your life waiting for other people to do the things that you want to do.
Speaker 2:You'll never do it.
Speaker 1:And then you will not be fulfilled, you won't be happy, and then again going to being on your deathbed. If you get to even get to that point where you have a few days to say your peace is, I wish I went to that place I always wanted to go to. I wish I went back to school and and became what I really wanted to become. You know, I wish, and that's the worst thing you can take to your grave is regret, definitely.
Speaker 1:and then when it goes to the relationship side, you, we, carry a lot of regret, sometimes on dating people that you wish you never broke it off with, or we all have made poor mistakes, shitty ones in relationships and it doesn't have to be in a toxic way. But we've made definitely bad choices in relationships and it doesn't have to be in a toxic way, but we've made definitely, you know, bad choices in relationships or even you didn't even make that step to like ask that person out because you know and you regret that for the rest of your life.
Speaker 2:You know, I mean that like on that side too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like the one like the one that got away and but. But we have to take these things that happened with us as there's no regrets. These are life lessons, especially with relationships, especially Because I look back and, man, I wish I did things a lot differently in certain situations, because they weren't good girls. I knew that they were wife material, yeah, you know, and for me, I was just so clouded and my mind was poisoned with everything else that I was pushing down and dealing with that. I wasn't thinking straight.
Speaker 1:And then that's where we make, you know, our poor choices, because we're struggling and we're we're, we're not all there and we're not thinking clearly. And then afterwards, for me, like I broke my own heart basically self-sabotage, you know, but I can't look back and and regret it. It's what did I take from that? What did I learn from that? And that's how we have to look at it. We can't have regrets. We have to take this as like man, yeah, and even if it was your fault, take accountability for it, learn from it, look yourself in the mirror and be like you know what?
Speaker 1:Let me ask you this, and even if you can't, know, let me ask you this, and even if you can't, let me ask you this so do you think in that moment in time that you were healthy in your, in your mind to even accept that person?
Speaker 2:yeah, was I in the first place.
Speaker 1:No, in the first place I don't believe so and uh, you know we've talked a lot about this before is you know you don't attract what you want, you attract who you are. So when I was struggling and running on autopilot for years and and fighting depression all the time and anxiety all the time and sure you know I've had good girls come around, but I also attracted emotionally damaged women because I was emotionally makes sense.
Speaker 1:Makes sense, yeah, because you're right, yeah yeah, 100, right, yeah, and, like I said, there was good girls and and all that. But you know, where was I at? Like I, I was a mess and I didn't even realize it because my head was so cloudy.
Speaker 1:And you know, we wait for people to come make you happy and that's what I was doing like oh, if I was with somebody yeah, you're pushing your happiness on other people and I'd feel better, and I'd feel better, but my brother-in-law actually it's funny, I just talked about this today with another friend is my brother-in-law said it to me a long time ago is that he called me an emotional paramedic? Yeah, I remember you saying that. Yeah, where always and a lot of us do that where you I always tried to fix people but I wasn't fixing myself. It's like giving really good advice but never taking it for myself, you know.
Speaker 1:And then the girls that I dated I was always trying to fix them and push them and help you with your goals and do this, but at the same time, I was broken, I was struggling. I was, you know, because I'm always trying, I'm yeah, I'm an empath, right, I care about people and I tried to help them, push them, do this, do that, and at the same time, when I'm sitting there by myself, I'm in tears and I'm broken and I don't know how to fix myself. So me trying to help other people, I thought would be making me feel better and, yeah, helping people always makes you feel better because you're helping somebody. But in that sense, I was putting so much strain on lifting them up and trying to build them up because I knew they had their own issues, not realizing that I wasn't paying attention.
Speaker 2:Let me put it this way you ever think that maybe you're answering their prayers, that they needed someone like you to come into their life to give them that.
Speaker 1:A hundred percent. I truly believe that Sometimes you come into someone's life to show them Because I made a lot of mistakes, but in different ways. I've never cheated, I've never disrespected. I cared, I tried, but I've never cheated, I've never disrespected. I cared, I tried, but I was failing emotionally. And I believe that some people come into your lives to show you what real love is, and some people come into your lives to show you how to love yourself.
Speaker 2:And not even just love, though, man, but I mean, some people just need that, maybe lesson you know what I mean that you bring into their life, and it could be, you know, it could be toxic or it could be a great relationship, no matter what.
Speaker 2:There's some kind of lesson in there and, at the end of the day, one of or two people are going to learn that.
Speaker 2:But, like you coming in, like you know, like manifesting right, like how we talk about manifesting, maybe this partner you know was manifesting oh, please, bring someone good into my life that's going to give me this, this, this and and then here you are, that person giving all that, but she's not giving it back. So maybe they manifested you to give that because that's what they needed in time, and you're still waiting on your time to get what you need to receive. But before you do that, you have to give out all this, this, whatever that person needs, or whoever they are, or multiple people. It's kind of like when you start thinking of it that way, it's it, you know, it kind of changes your perspective, even like when you break up with someone Like, okay, well, this person needed that from me. So it makes it feel even a little bit easier. You know you're teaching them a lesson that they needed. You may not come out with a lesson at all.
Speaker 1:Well and I think that goes to what I was meant by that they. Sometimes someone comes in your life to teach you how to love yourself.
Speaker 1:Is that that lesson is? You're the one that messed it up. You're the one that they left. You're the one that is hurt, but in that hurt and in that them leaving you made you really look at yourself in the mirror and know that you have things to fix and things to change and really learn to love yourself. When I look at my last relationship that icing on the cake I've talked a lot about before that lesson for me was learning how to love myself. Because I know that girl. I showed her what it was like to really what real love is and how I treated her. But because of my poisoned mind and not being there and shutting down and not talking about my shit and pushing away on my own part and fucking it up and her having enough and leaving that left she came in as a lesson for me to realize that I can't keep doing this to myself. You went off. That was the final.
Speaker 1:Well you went that was the final.
Speaker 2:You went offside is pretty much what it is. Man, you like jumped the gun, you, what I mean? Before you were even ready to do that. You know, your mind probably tricked you because you probably I don't know wanted company in a sense. Maybe that's what it is and you're trying to make your mind maybe trick yourself. In that, you know, because misery loves company and if you're down like that, definitely you want, you know, because you're going to lean on someone else and and hope that, that, that a rush, that whatever it's called that, that gives you that rush, um, dopamine, yeah, you know, and that's what it is. A lot of people just start chasing that dopamine. That's why a lot of people jump from relationship to relationship, monkey branching, as we said last episode. It's, it's that dopamine chase, same with drugs.
Speaker 1:Yeah and that and that. Monkey branching too with when people do this is. You know that also stems from their childhood and abandonment issues and not knowing how to be alone, or scared to be alone, or don't even know how to be alone I dealt with abandonment issues because I know a few people.
Speaker 1:Abandonment issues for sure, right, and they they just need that comfort and security. But when you go from relationship to relationship and the reason they keep going relationship to relationship is because and each of them fail because they haven't healed whatever, whether it was childhood or the first you know toxic or abusive relationship they were in, and they just use the next person, not just to get over that person, but that was their comfort, so they didn't have to deal with their thoughts. And then this person is a distraction and the people that do that end up setting.
Speaker 2:It's like playing Frogger. It's like playing Frogger dude. You know what I mean. Straight up, jumping through, jumping through until you get hit by that fucking car. Straight playing Frogger, dude. You know what I mean? Straight up, jumping through, jumping through until you get hit by that fucking car. Straight up Frogger, that's the new name for it.
Speaker 1:Oh, a million percent right, but any time that you go from a relationship to a relationship that fast, it's not going to work. You know, and especially us, that are in relationships as men and pretty much majority of the time when the relationship ends, regardless of who ends it, that girl is in a relationship way faster than it's a study that you know, and it's a lot of, the study yeah, well, I mean, it's a lot easier for women as well, because they they they got the DMS, they got this, they got that.
Speaker 1:If they're a good looking girl, like a snap of their finger they're on a date tomorrow, right. So it's really not that hard for them to get attention and to have company, right. But when? But if you're able to take that time from that relationship, be alone and it's really hard when you're heartbroken and it's really hard when that person is no longer around, and that's what you're used to but if you're able to push through that beginning stage of loneliness and be alone, figure out where you went wrong, figure it out what it is that you know you need to change.
Speaker 1:For example, like me, with the last one, I had to really look at myself in the mirror and I'm actually, to this day, grateful for it, because that taught me the biggest, one of the biggest lessons of my life. And if it wasn't for the pain of that, that wouldn't push me to and force myself to, look at myself in the mirror and be like you, will never feel like this again. You're not going to keep doing this to yourself. You're not going to keep doing this to yourself. You're not going to keep hurting these women unintentionally and if you ever want to have a healthy relationship, you need to fix you, and you need to fix this now. So that person came into my life to teach me one of the most valuable lessons, because that in my history of dating, because I was so polluted in my mind is I shut down every relationship Anytime. Something got hard in my own personal life, shut down, shut down, shut down self-sabotage all the way up to the last one. And then that one, she came into my life as like the final boss.
Speaker 1:The final boss, the final boss, the final boss, and I was, and then I was defeated. But in that defeat was my biggest triumph 100. That's where you learn because of yeah, man, you know a lot of heart, like heartbreak in general, is the worst feeling on the planet. Hands down Unless you have immediate death or heartbreak is excruciating. It lasts way too long.
Speaker 2:You can die from heartbreak, bro. I told you I think we talked about this in one episode before my grandma, because my grandpa passed away. My grandma died from a broken heart Days after. You really can die from a broken heart, it's true.
Speaker 1:Or drive you to suicide, like my best husband. His wife left him and two weeks later she was with somebody else. He hung himself.
Speaker 2:You know what man?
Speaker 1:I get it Two kids.
Speaker 2:I fucking get it, man, I do get it. You know what I mean. I get it, I understand, I get it. I understand it, you know, Like your whole life. I saw a video. This is crazy man. So this guy I think he's in his seventies and he gets um, his daughters are like in their late twenties and they want to do a DNA testing or whatever it is. So they do it and he finds out that the kids aren't even his and the guy's in his seventies man, all this time do it and he finds out that the kids aren't even his and the guy's in his 70s man, All this time, his whole life has been a fucking lie. Isn't that wild? Imagine those aren't even your kids, man, you know.
Speaker 1:I had to know that you're at the end of your life, kind of like that, and then that's, that's what you're leaving with with that information like that that's heartbreaking like, but people are evil men but wow you know when you're in that heart, when you're in that heartbreak is. It's also about perspective, because I'll tell you.
Speaker 1:In heartbreak I was the most power-driven, productive, goal-orientated. Twice a day at the gym, I was not losing my focus with any distractions. So heartbreak is the biggest blessing and tool for success. One million percent of this. And if you and I understand the pain just like you, man, we've been there, I've been there.
Speaker 2:A few, everybody has and it is brutal.
Speaker 1:You don't want to eat, you don't even want to get up and shower. You missing work, even though you know you should go. Then you're feeling shittier because now you're not making money, just that butterfly effect and a downward spiral, right, and a lot of people, because I get that pain, man, it sucks. Then you start drinking drinking to go to sleep, popping pills, smoking weed, whatever it is because you're masking it, right, temporary band-Aids 100%.
Speaker 1:But you take that and you have to get up and that pain, especially as men, because I truly believe and I've heard it lots that men take breakups a lot harder. They take, you know, again, it's a lot easier for women, right, and but in that heartbreak is your biggest keys to success. Because when you come out of that six months later and the work like what I did, I'm even shocked, like I've always worked hard, I always go to the gym, but that drive after the first couple weeks, you know you got to get up, I've. I was just I'm surprised I even did that shit, man, because I would just fucking get out of my way. Now I'm leveling up, farther than I've ever leveled up the drive.
Speaker 2:Man. That's what it is, it's like it. You use that fucking pain, you take it and you turn it around and use and put it to action.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean and that even goes for anything. Any pain that you go through is your biggest blessing because you're you're learning from what it is, that you're dealing with the pain it is driving you and as long as you're not doing what a lot of people do is the drinking and feeling sorry for yourself. Poor me, I understand it hurts, I do million percent. Whatever pain that is, I get it. It's fucking terrible. You can't shake it 24, 7 for months, weeks, whatever. But you, you gotta use the positive distractions, level up and if you're the man she doesn't want, become the man she can't have.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, right, and you just got to now look out for you and just put in the work man. Level up, work harder, work that extra overtime, hit the gym twice a day if you have to Start doing like we always talk about, about do different things in your day, change your routine.
Speaker 2:Yeah, don't sit in your mind bro Do this. Because if you sit in your mind, it's just going to drive you crazy.
Speaker 1:But like we always say too when you feel you heal, it's okay. And especially guys, we don't want to cry over women like it, dude, if you love the girl man, you're a human being if it hurts cry, let it out.
Speaker 2:You're letting it out you're feeling.
Speaker 1:If your body wants you to cry man, fucking cry man, it's okay. You're not weak because you're crying because you lost somebody, because You're stronger.
Speaker 2:actually. That doesn't make you weak, that makes you fucking human. Yeah.
Speaker 1:But take that and flip it, turn it into you, do everything and everything that you can in that positive direction. Don't use negative distractions. You know, and a lot of times, especially with heartbreak and pain is, you know, people run out and hang out with their friends every weekend, go to the bar, drink distraction, distraction. They're on Tinder, swiping, distraction, distraction. But all that is doing is delaying your progress, delaying the outcome that you need to get to and now, instead of getting to the best version of yourself in six months, now, it's taking two years. Right, the? The worst thing you can do when you're feeling that way, especially in a heartbreak, is go on other dates. Yeah, because for one, when you're in that, all you're doing is comparing them, every person you go on a date with to the one and it's not fair to the person.
Speaker 1:And even if you nope no, man not at all because you're bringing them into your fucking, into your damaged life right now right but people are selfish. People will all feel better if I sleep with her.
Speaker 1:But guess what happens when you, when you do say you hook up with this girl off tinder in the morning, you're gonna feel even shittier because you just compared her to the girl that you're in love with and then she's like oh, I like this guy, or vice versa, because girls do it all the time too oh, I really like him and he was nice and this and that, but then you're just like I'm out there because you still love my ex, and now this person's hurt. Now this person's hurt, so now you're dragging them into your bullshit. I mean, if you do, which is unfair?
Speaker 2:you just want sex, man, be straight up. Be like look, I'm just looking for fucking, a friends with benefits or no strings attached. I mean, if that's what you need at that moment in time, fucking so be it. Man, we're all human beings, we all fucking have feelings, everybody's different. That's what you need. But be straight up. Don't fuck with people's minds too. You know, like that's what you're saying. You know, say someone goes out there and pretending oh, I'm looking for a relationship. Actually, you're just going to go out there and have sex and then never fucking talk to the person again. Be straight up, man, you'll get farther. You know that goes with the communication, man, in relationships it doesn't matter if it's a partnership, a friend with benefits, like whatever the fucking may be. You know, communicate, that's the number one thing. Don't fuck with people.
Speaker 1:And you know how easy sex and dating and all that would be if everyone was just honest up front at the beginning like, instead of like weaseling around, like, oh, I'll take her out wine and diner just because I want to sleep with her, but I don't tell her that I'm the nice guy, I'm gonna fucking show on this and that and then sleep with her and then boom, never talk to her again and that fucks with people, man, both sides, definitely man.
Speaker 2:That's how people get hurt and get fucked up, man. That's why people close off or people act the way they do. We're just hurting each other, when we should all just come together and understand that let's not fucking play these head games. We're adults, it's not fucking 16-year-old teenagers here, you know, and that's a lot. That's a big thing too.
Speaker 1:Man is head games, bro, by the people that do that too. That stems from their either childhood or, you know, previous toxic relationships. Right that they haven't dealt with. It's all traumas. It's all tied to all traumas. It's all tied to their traumas and their fucking upbringing or their last marriage or something. It's just all the shit that those people have yet to deal with, or?
Speaker 1:bleeding on other people man and now they're carrying it over, bleeding on other people, like we always say that's all you're doing is bleeding on other people and that's why say that's all you're doing is bleeding on other people and that's why everyone gets hurt. That's why people get fucked up in the head, do crazy things, become people they never thought they would. Their self kills people's self-esteem, self-worth gone. You know, because the people that are feeding their heads full of shit and lies when, like I said, it could be the easiest thing ever. It's like you know what. I'm busy guy, I'm really not looking for anything, but maybe you want to fucking go for dinner from time to time.
Speaker 2:Hang out, that's all I'm looking for, done you get farther in it, man, but you know yeah and I.
Speaker 1:But most people are probably thinking well, you know, I don't really have any other options, so I'm just going to keep fucking playing on this one and digging at this one. And that's why, because most people aren't confident enough for that person to say no or walk away because they don't want to feel rejected. So if I just went up and just said you know what? I haven't been laid in fucking two weeks or a month or two months, are you down right, majority, right off the bat. The girl you pervert yeah, this, this guy's a pig.
Speaker 1:But really am I a pig yeah, I'm being honest, but that's how we're going to be portrayed for being honest, so that's why people are not honest.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know what I mean on certain things like that.
Speaker 1:Like if you just wanted friends with benefits. You hang out for a night like this is all I want. I got so much going on. I can't give you 100, but if you're down, boom. But as a guy saying that to a girl man, 99 of women will look at me like ew get the fuck out of here Like you're a pig, like you're whatever, like why?
Speaker 1:I'm being honest. I was more honest to you than the last five guys I met. You hung out with you just didn't like what I wanted. That's fine. You know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Let me throw this out there. I said this, I think, one of the very first episodes we did, and you agreed with me, so I just want to throw it out there again. I believe and so do you now Well, not now, but you did Women hold the key to relationships. I mean to sex. Sorry Women hold the key to sex. And men hold the key to relationships I mean to sex sorry women hold the key to sex and men hold the key to relationships and it's 100 true, and yeah, they hold the key, yeah men, men, put the ring on it's.
Speaker 2:It's you know what I mean?
Speaker 1:like it's, like that and nowadays, girls all want this guy and this and this, and I got the power and this. But to be honest with you, man, realistically it's the guy that should be, you know, the one being chased after, not guys chasing women. Guys are the ones that provide for the most part. All you know what I mean. Like men, men are born with no status we have to create it.
Speaker 2:I agree, you know that's women.
Speaker 1:Women are born with status, meaning they get a lot more things that we don't buddy I have a daughter, you have a daughter there.
Speaker 2:You go like you know, I mean, that's daddy's little girl, I will do anything for her. You know, and you're the same thing, like you know, right off the bat, bro, you know.
Speaker 1:Well, not, and just like you could be a good-looking girl walking down the street down by the water, and there could be millionaire guys with yachts and I'll invite you on the boat in a second. Do you think anyone's inviting a random guy onto their yacht? Ever no, because that's status. Being female nature, they get these things.
Speaker 2:We have to create our own status. That's true, man Right.
Speaker 1:Puts a lot of pressure on us as men. Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know, and then a lot of people portray to be who they want to be, but they're really not that person. So they live this fake life, you know, through their entire life. A lot of actors you could say are like that because they have to, because they're in the limelight. You know they can't really do what they want to do, you know. So they portray this fake life and it's definitely mental straining on your head, man, you know, Because oh, I have to be this, I have to be this for everybody to accept me. You know what I mean 100%.
Speaker 2:You know Women, like you said walk down and get invited right away. You know what I mean A hundred percent. You know women, like just can. Like you said, walk down and get invited right away.
Speaker 1:Well, you know that's that easy. You're a good looking girl and there's a bunch of guys on a yacht.
Speaker 2:Hey, do you want to come?
Speaker 1:on the yacht? Fuck, nobody's asking. Nobody's asking us to go on a fucking yacht. Are you kidding?
Speaker 2:fucking yacht. Are you kidding? Yeah, you know what I mean. They'll ask us to untie the rope for them so they can fuck off. That's what they'll ask.
Speaker 1:You know, when we were younger, going to the club, girls don't wait in line, girls don't pay cover, girls get free drinks automatically just for being a girl. Right, guys are standing in line, paying double just to pass the line and shit like that. So it's little things like that, but it's uh, it's hard on the mental health definitely your mental mind, you know but you know, that being said, though, is that's just the world we live in.
Speaker 1:That's it is what it is. So, as a man, we need to become the best versions of ourselves. In those heartbreaks and those pains is where you will find your greatest success. You will level up, you will become more fit, you become more knowledgeable reading books, doing whatever these things and bettering your life so that, if you ever go through that, you come out of these things a lot faster and feeling a lot better about yourself. And, like I said, with that girl I dated, she taught me a huge lesson about learning to love myself, because, when I look back at that relationship and every other one before that, I didn't love myself, man.
Speaker 2:I was struggling.
Speaker 1:I didn't know how to love myself. So until that happened and that was the you know, the cherry on top of all the relationships that's failed in my life that was my final lesson. That was to be like, and that pain and looking at myself in the mirror and finally taking accountability and be like man. You did this. You need to face you now. You don't want to feel like this ever again. So what are you going to do?
Speaker 2:about it.
Speaker 1:I take responsibility, you know, I realize where I went wrong and, going back to the beginning, I don't have regrets and I'm grateful for it. And it sucked Terrible man. She was a good girl, but that's life, man. There's nothing you can do about it. So I can't sit and regret it. You guys can't sit and, oh, I regret not doing this and we tell ourselves stories. Well, if I would have said this that night, or if I just showed up 10 minutes early and I'll just you gotta let it go.
Speaker 1:You can't hold on to it. You gotta let it go. Look at yourself and be like you know what. Where did I go wrong? What did I do? Because we all done it. Oh well, they did this and they point those fingers because it makes you feel better, when I realized at the beginning I was pointing fingers and you know, oh, they're narcissists, they're this blah, blah, blah. But then, yeah, it makes you feel better.
Speaker 1:Temporarily, maybe for a couple weeks, you sleep a little bit better because you've created some hate in your head or it was all their fault. But man, once you really look in the mirror and take that accountability and realize no man.
Speaker 1:All the accountability brother it is and those people that jump from relationship to relationship, take none accountability and realize no man, although accountability brother you, it is. And those people that jump from relationship to relationship take none right, because they jump to the next relationship blaming the last person because they were the narcissist or he was mentally abusive or she did this, so they just use that to go to the next one and then do the same with that one and go to the next one.
Speaker 2:Monkey branching bro.
Speaker 1:And because they don't take accountability in anything that they do in their relationship. So when they go to the next one they don't have to. But those relationships will never end. Someone that you dated and you know, now you're broken up and then they're with someone else pretty quick or right away. Just know this is in the beginning. Yeah, they might have to you. They found someone and now they're happy in your head because you're telling yourself stories and you're alone. In that time of being alone is when you are putting in the most work to become the best version and right when you get to the way better spot in your life, their life is collapsing. Because that relationship and this is guaranteed 99 of the time because they chose not to fix themselves, be alone, figure out what they want, because they went to the next one and guess what that relationship is destined that's usually when they're knocking on the door that one's and that's when that relationship is failing.
Speaker 1:And now she's crumbling, you're laughing, you've leveled up, you're better in life, because then you'll get to a point where, even if they wanted to come back, because anyone, who's feeling?
Speaker 1:heartbreak means you're not the one that ended, for the most part, right. So, and in the heartbreak, you just want them to call you. I just want them to text and you're looking at your phone, is it them? I just want them to call you. I just want them to text and you're looking at your phone, is it them, do they? I just want to hear them tell me they love me again, or I just want to see them and blah, blah, all the shit that you tell yourself, because you heard it.
Speaker 1:But in that time that they bounce to whoever else and you're the one now you know fucking getting a promotion now you're in shape, now you more money in the bank and doing all these things now when they're hurting, and you're fucking in a better place and you're starting to learn to love yourself, like I did. Now, if they message because white minded, I'm like yeah, no, I'm good, I'm all right, because that drive of heartbreak you know people use that and think, well, if I change and I do this, that they'll take me back. No, don't do it for that reason, because when you level up and become better in your life, you're gonna attract better.
Speaker 2:So you think that the person was the love of your life, or they were the one. Well, they're not the one, because you, they would have stayed man, you know they would have stayed.
Speaker 1:You would have figured it out, you well no contact is for you.
Speaker 2:It's not for you to get someone back in your life. A lot of people don't understand that. No contact is for you and your own mental health. You know it really is one One million percent. Should I take a bow?
Speaker 1:There you go there, it is there it is man, no con when you hear about that. No contact, like I remember when I was hurting and I'm like there's no way, because in my mind there was no way she would message me ever.
Speaker 2:No, I fell off the planet. I had no contact. It's over.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no contact Every day. No contact over. Yeah, no contact every day. Six weeks later, boom, I'm like get the fuck out of here. It works, but you're not doing it for that, though. But you're the no contact, like you said, is for you. And even with toxic friends, everybody, man, everybody, anybody that affects your mental health, that makes you feel shitty, you're hurting. That no contact, though, I tell you, is for, like you said, is for you. Use that no contact, redirect your thinking into you, and your life will get so much better when you stop worrying or thinking of what they're doing and who they're with and start putting it into what you're doing, because they don't give a fuck about what you're doing man?
Speaker 2:they're probably out there doing their own thing, you know, while you're sitting yeah, while you're sitting there moping around like get out of here, man. Take control of your life. Smart enough so you?
Speaker 1:so you're gonna sit around and mope and pour me and play victim and drink and yeah, you miss them. I get it, it hurts, I get it, but you're going to do that to yourself for another year, while the other person's probably engaged by now, not even barely thinking about you, and you've thrown away your job. You're slowly becoming an alcoholic. People don't want to be around you because you're fucking miserable all the time and it's always poor me and I don't do it. You can't. You know what man?
Speaker 2:it's one person, bro, one person. There's like three billion out there and it's one person you're crying over. Go find another bill, like there's three billion men. You know what I mean? Don't, don't waste your time, man.
Speaker 1:Take the lesson and move but in that no, yeah, in that no. Contact is where you become the best version of yourself. Use that pain to drive you and you will attract and find 10 times better than what you just dated a million.
Speaker 2:Until you get to the final boss. It's all leveling up and that's it.
Speaker 1:Until you get to the final boss, and then, this time, you'll marry him. But you got to use that pain to drive you, not to destroy you. Don't let that pain destroy you.
Speaker 2:Well, let me let me ask you this. And well, let me let me ask you though, and most people do you think it's okay to cut ties with a family member?
Speaker 1:well, I've done it.
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't know, I mean too so. I guess that's a yes.
Speaker 1:There's. Yeah, obviously we talked about mine, I think two weeks ago, but it's cutting ties in terms of like forever or for a while I don't know.
Speaker 2:I'm still trying to figure that shit out. To be honest with you in my own thing, you know, like you and I both know I don't talk to my dad. I told him pretty much to go fuck himself on my birthday a couple years back, probably four years, maybe four or five years. I haven't talked to him. I was just tired of the disrespect. I don't know, man, I wish I'll tell you straight up, man, I wish, I wish I had a, a good dad. You know, I wish I could have these relationships I see with other friends, like even you and your dad, man, that's you guys got a great relationship. I wish I had that. You know it hard, definitely, but is it necessary? Yes, because it's very toxic. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, being that they're family, we obviously tolerate a lot more than we should growing up, because there's a lot of like people are people and there's toxic people. Whether it's family or not, there's a person. They can be toxic, could be your sister and she's most toxic person on the planet, but it's still your family and we tolerate way more than we would with anybody else, because it's like we're family before.
Speaker 1:But but if it's that detrimental to your mental health and it is basically ruining you, destroying you, you're okay. It's okay to separate yourself from that. It's okay to distance yourself for a long time and, depending on the severity of what that is like my sister's case you can't ever come back.
Speaker 2:Let's face it, I don't give a fuck what people say. At the end of the day, really, it's my life, you know, and if I think this person is toxic, then I'm going to do what I think is best for me and my daughter's mental health. People, oh, you should put your dad. You know. Well, fuck it, man. You know I get it, I get. Oh, life, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, okay, but no man, no, if this person's not there pretty much for your whole life, why the fuck do I want that person in my life? I don't need that person. My mom's my dad. My mom raised me. My mom's the most beautiful, purest person. She was my mom and my dad and I owe everything to her. You know so person. She was my mom and my dad and I owe everything to her.
Speaker 2:I think it's okay. Don't let people get you down if they say oh no, you've got to make amends, you don't have to. You really don't have to. I don't think you have to. You can apologize on your own, like I did to the world a couple episodes ago, but it doesn't mean that you have to have that person in your life. And that goes for friendships as well or relationships or family members. Be selfish. Look out for you. You're number one. They do not have to come to your birthday party. It's true, man.
Speaker 1:Well, I think that if someone is that toxic or that detrimental to your health or well-being and the choices that they're making, then definitely separate yourself from that, even in the relationships, and if you know it is their job.
Speaker 1:If they're the ones that are messing up, to reach out to you and make amends, if they choose to or not, you know and then it's up to you whether you choose to forgive them and allow them back in, depending on the severity. Obviously, you know there's siblings that piss each other off and don't talk for two months, and then they're fine.
Speaker 2:There's, there's me and my sister man, but I love her to death, Love my sister to death, but we just don't talk. But I mean, that's it. I talk to her once in a while, but I mean, not as much as I'd like to, but people got their own lives.
Speaker 1:You know, sometimes, man, you just got to be the bigger person and reach out. If that's what you want. Oh, I have, but it's okay, you know, sometimes she knows that I love her from far man and but it's okay, she knows that I love her from far, man, and that's okay.
Speaker 2:Man, I'm dealing with my own things too, though, honestly, I pull myself away from my family a lot of times when I'm dealing with things because they're dealing with their own things. My mom's definitely dealing with their own things. My mom's definitely dealing with her own things. So I'm trying to fix me over here, and they know I'm okay, like I talk to my mom right almost daily. They know I'm okay, but I try to fix me so then I can be the best version for them. You know, and that's my problem, I don't want to put that burden on anybody else. I try to. I just I'm an Aries man, we hibernate and we but we fix like it's not a bad thing, like I disappear, like I deactivate my Facebook, like I'm disappearing and I'm becoming almost the end boss, the level, the next level. You know, super Saiyan, eric, there we go. You know what I mean. That's what it's about.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but you know what you just said. There is that you don't want to burden.
Speaker 2:I know that that's my own thing that I got to work on.
Speaker 1:No, no. What I'm getting at is that was me for 20 years and that's why my relationships failed, because I was dealing with so much other bullshit in my life. I didn't want to burden my girlfriend or whoever that I was in love with or my relationship with any of this, because in my mind, I love you. This is not your problem. I don't want you to have to deal with it. I'm gonna deal with it somehow and in my head I gotta figure this out and I couldn't.
Speaker 1:So I started to shut down and instead of talking about it and maybe letting someone in because I didn't want to burden them with that, I didn't want them to judge me or think differently than me because of this.
Speaker 1:So instead I bottled it up, I pushed it down, but yet I was just mentally killing myself and in that you don't give them the attention, you're not attentive, you're, you come across as just down and miserable to your friends.
Speaker 1:All these things in your relationship you're bottling it, because I bottled it and I didn't want to be a burden and it was all coming from the right place in my mind, because it's not fair that you have to deal with this. I know you care about me, but I care about you too much to let you take this on or be by my side, because I'm not going to give you 100 if I have to deal with this right now. So instead I'll try to deal with all of it without any help and don't talk about it, and maybe someone would have been there for me if I would have just let them. But you know, like you you just said is you don't want to burden them, but you know, sometimes it's okay no well here's because here's the thing though, man, I mean my, my mom's already stressed out enough.
Speaker 2:I mean, she just had a heart attack, she's going through all this stuff. You know what I mean. So I don't want to come there like I I'll go. I saw her like I saw her last week and I talked to her daily. But I don't want to come there Like I'll go. I saw her like I saw her last week and I talked to her daily. But I don't want to go there and feel all down and then she's, you know, like feeling that when she's already going through that Don't get me wrong I got a counselor.
Speaker 2:Wednesday is actually my first session. I talked to you, I also talked to my other friends, so I am letting loose. There's no bottling here. You know what I mean. So I'm on the right path, doing those things right. But this is a whole different situation, though. There's no way like I don't want my mom to see me down when she's already going through all this. She's got to go. They think maybe she's got cancer on her lung when they did a CT scan. So now they're going and taking a sample and they're going to go get it figured out to see if it's cancerous or not. So it's stuff like that. There's no way I want to hey, mom, this is what's happening to me, but you're doing that. I know, as a parent, she would want that because I'm her son, but I love her. I'm not going to show her. I got to be strong for her in that sense.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's obviously a little bit different of a situation being what your mom's dealing with, but I just mean kind of in general with you know, and anybody listening is don't do what I did for 20 years and and not talk about it.
Speaker 1:get it out there, bottle it and push and push people away because you become feel more lonely. You break your own heart. People walk away from you because they just can't take it anymore. Because you shut down, you self-sabotage it. So, whatever it is that you're struggling with, man, you got to get it open. You got to just Talk about it, man. Admit that you have issues. Say it's okay that you're fucked up. The whole world is fucked up. Every one of us has problems.
Speaker 2:Some people just hide it better than others. 100% man.
Speaker 1:Every single person walking through the mall, the grocery store, struggling with something, something is bothering them, something is irritating them, something is hurting them.
Speaker 2:Robin Williams man.
Speaker 1:Everybody. Everybody should go to counseling. Everybody needs to talk to somebody. You know, some people have dealt with way more than others. That's why we're sitting here, but it's we all got problems, man. Everybody's got problems. We're all fucked up, every one of us. We're all struggling with something. We're all struggling mentally with something. We're our own worst critics, because I'm my hot military. You know, we said it the other day. You know, the only person that's holding back is you. But we're battling ourselves daily and I struggle with it constantly, still to this day, battling myself Like why are you feeling like this? Why are you happy? You should be happy. Why aren't you? Why are you more excited? Why aren't you more grateful? Why aren't you? You know it's finding the negatives. I'm like there's no reason to find the negatives. You know I got so many positives now that I've accomplished and working on. Yeah, when I stand in front of the mirror and I'm by myself, I don't feel like I'm doing it and it's a and it's a shitty feeling. But that's me battling my own head.
Speaker 1:And we're all battling our own head. So we all got issues, man, it's just what do you do about it and being self-aware of those issues? And what do you do about it? And being self-aware of those issues? And but again it goes back. Like we said the other day, people don't want to admit it or talk about it because it's an automatic trigger. But guess what you have to? You have to face it if you want to 100 it's easier for me.
Speaker 1:If I it's easier for me not to say anything and just just be distracted and go and do this, then I don't have to deal with it, then I'll have as much, as much anxiety. But those are the people that are having constant failed relationships because you're not dealing with problems and you're carrying it over, you're bleeding on other people, you're being selfish, really, because now you're dragging other people into your fucking bullshit and you're messed up fucking life. You're a messed up emotion.
Speaker 1:Yeah man and then these people are getting heartbroken and hurt because you can't figure your shit out. And now you have a band because you had abandonment issues. You're fucking one way, today, the next, tomorrow, you fucking leave them high and dry. You said this and then tomorrow you're saying complete opposite. Fucking people's heads up.
Speaker 2:Man, that's the worst thing you can do is to do that psychological warfare.
Speaker 1:I'll be honest and I'll openly admit that I've done because I was fucked up and not intentionally, but I didn't know how to battle my own emotions because I was struggling so bad for so many years with all the other shit that I was throwing on my plate back to back. You know, and some people do it and they don't realize they're doing like me. I admit I didn't, I didn't, but now when I look back I know I did it. But I didn't know at the time that I was doing it because I was so used to running on autopilot that I just thought that was a day to day normal life for me, cause every day that's how I felt, like I'm, like that must be normal, because I felt the same way, fucking groundhog day you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:It was the same thing every day definitely but whatever pain and whatever heartbreak or whatever it is that you guys are dealing with in your life is use that pain to drive you, because when I realize in that last deep hole of fucking pain and torment is, I never thought that I could feel the way that I feel today, ever. But you have to put in the work and we say it all the time you got to put in the work. Use that to drive you to become the best version of yourself, because there are better days on the other end. And get the counseling, get whatever therapy fucking art class, yoga class, you name it, fucking pottery buddy. Don't wait for people to travel if that's what you want to do. Don't wait for other people to do things to live your life. Who cares? Go, pack your bag and go man, enjoy your life. And you start doing all the and you start doing all these things and all of a sudden, that poison starts to clear out in your mind.
Speaker 1:We all still battle. Like I said, I still battle every day, but that's minor compared to the trauma and the pain of 20 years. Now it's just me being stupid, talking to myself like an idiot, right, because we're on worst critic, but the clarity in how I look at life. Now, to the 20 years of how I live, life is night and fucking day, because I chose not to feel like that anymore. I realized I was beyond fucked up. I realized I'm the one that failed another relationship I'm the one that realized and relationship I'm the one that realized and took accountability of. Like man, you gotta fucking do this, that's enough. Yeah, and that's what most people need to do. Man is look at yourself in the mirror like do you like feeling like this breaking point?
Speaker 1:do you like fucking? Yeah, do you. Do you like it? Do you enjoy it? Are you happy? No, you're not. So why do you keep doing it? You know that this is making you feel shit here. You know, hanging out with those people you don't really want to, but you're doing it because that's the only friends you got right now and that's the wrong friends. But you're doing it and then you're feeling even shittier that you went hung out with them or dated that person, because you're living your life for other people and not yourself. So now you're just living in a constant state of depression.
Speaker 2:So don't wait, because nobody's coming to save you Make your own path, man Make your own path.
Speaker 1:Dig your own path, man Pave it and fucking walk it, run it, get a fucking Segway, bro.
Speaker 2:Run that shit on a Segway. Do whatever you fucking need to do, man, but make that own path your own, and and let people follow you.
Speaker 1:Then be a fucking leader, you know yeah, be a leader, don't be a follower man. Live, live your life. Live it for you, not for anybody else. Fuck what everybody else says, fuck the haters. You're not gonna please everybody, you're not gonna be attractive to everybody, so who fucking cares? It does not matter what you do in your life, positive or negative, someone's gonna say something about it, so you might as well do it anyways. Yeah, you can save a pregnant woman and her four kids from a burning building. One fucking idiot. Be like.
Speaker 1:Well, you didn't save the dog yeah it doesn't matter yeah you know what I mean. That's the same. So it doesn't matter now how positive and life positive life changes you make. Someone's gonna bash it, someone's gonna knock it, but that's just. That's a reflection of where they are. So just remember that. So live your life. Do you stop waiting for other people? Take the pain that you deal with in your life. The there's no failures. They're, they're lessons learned. Right, take those lessons.
Speaker 1:Take the pain and let that fucking drive you to be the best version you've ever been and transform yourself because, like I said, on the other end of that you will look at your life with such clarity. 100, you create boundaries. Your self-worth goes up, your self-esteem goes up. You don't tolerate any bullshit or disrespect. You see the red flags. You, you're done. I'm not dragging this out. Too bad, I'll be just fine if you don't want to date me. I'll be just fine if you don't call me again.
Speaker 2:Well, if you see those red flags, you don't want to be just fine, you just fuck off. See you later, like don't surround yourself.
Speaker 1:But most people ignore it because they have such low self-esteem, you know, and they're afraid to lose this person because they see the good in them and blah, blah, blah, whatever. But when you come to that point of clarity, more confidence, you love yourself. Then you know what you want, you know what you're attracting and if it's bullshit you will cut it off in a second and you won't even lose any sleep over it.
Speaker 1:But, I don't care how hot you are, I don't care. Oh no, you don't even lose any sleep over it. But I don't care how hot you are, I don't care. Oh, now you don't want to hang out with me because I don't care, I'm not losing sleep, but my favorite color.
Speaker 1:And then I'll be single for two more months. Just because I don't date you. I don't give a shit. Yeah, so use the lessons that we learn and the pain that we suffer and the obstacles that life throws our way as your driving force my favorite part of all that though bro I'll tell you, man, my favorite part is who you become.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. Who you become. You are fucking Bob 2.0. You know what I mean. Harry 2.0, you know you becomea better person because you learn all these things. As long as you take the right steps, go forward. You're gonna learn that forward is forward, remember, but it's true, man, right, that's that's what I like man Is. That's my favorite is becoming that person. And then you're happy with yourself and you, at the end of it, you love yourself, and what's better than anything else in this world is you loving yourself.
Speaker 1:You know so, and that's that's the key world is you loving yourself? You know so and that's the key, because when you love yourself, you can love someone properly, you can be the best parent Be happy Just be comfortable in your own skin. Do what drives you, do what drives you. Do what makes you happy. Stop living for other people, don't wait for anybody else, and that's it. You know so it's true, man? Well, yeah, buddy.
Speaker 2:I liked it. It was a good man. Good points, thank you. Yeah, it was good.
Speaker 1:Thank you bro.
Speaker 2:Thank you for being here, thank you for being my friend, thank you for doing this every day. You know thank you, appreciate you.
Speaker 1:I appreciate you, man. I got your back 100% On that note my friend.
Speaker 1:thank you all again for listening. We love every one of you. We greatly appreciate you. You guys drive us to keep doing what we're doing. If you guys are really feeling alone, broken, shattered, we're here. Hit us up rawmindspodcasts at gmailcom. We will answer any message, any text, any email. Hit us up on TikTok as well, rawmindspodcast. If I can't answer it, eric will, or vice versa. Man, there's always someone here for you. There's always someone here that's going to be here for you. Keep tuning in and checking us out every week, man, because we're we're on all platforms and, uh, we'll be here every week. Man, we ain't going nowhere. So we really appreciate you guys and, on uh, that note, if you can't find good people, be good people.
Speaker 2:Yeah, thank you man, thank you everybody else. I mean, we feel these feelings. We've gone through this. You know, this is real life shit. We're trying to put out there that it's okay to hurt, definitely okay to hurt, but you're not alone, you guys are not alone. So just want to let you guys know that. Anyways, thank you, I appreciate all you guys. Thanks for all the love. Be good or be good at it. Bye.