The Special Parent Podcast

Building Resilience: Mental Health Workouts for Special Needs Parents with Monica from Avance Hub | Ep7

June 03, 2024 Dr. Deanna Iverson Episode 7
Building Resilience: Mental Health Workouts for Special Needs Parents with Monica from Avance Hub | Ep7
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The Special Parent Podcast
Building Resilience: Mental Health Workouts for Special Needs Parents with Monica from Avance Hub | Ep7
Jun 03, 2024 Episode 7
Dr. Deanna Iverson

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How would you like to transform your daily stress management into a routine that builds emotional resilience? Join me, Dr. Deanna Iverson, and my incredible guest Monica Pineda, founder of Avance Hub, as we explore mental health "workouts" specifically designed for parents of special needs children. We'll discuss practical, flexible strategies that can be adapted to life’s unpredictable demands, helping you maintain your mental health and set a positive example for your children.

Ever wondered how recognizing your emotional state could change your parenting game? Monica and I break down the importance of stress scales and mental health exercises, showing how these tools can help you become a more responsive, less reactive parent. Learn how to guide your children through emotional regulation using intentional language and create a more supportive home environment that benefits everyone.

Self-compassion and flexibility are essential, especially when your parenting journey involves special needs. We discuss the power of acknowledging your own imperfections and practicing self-forgiveness. Monica shares insights on action-oriented programs like "Connect to Yourself" (C2Y) and the benefits of building a support system. We'll also look at how a strong community, both online and offline, can provide the understanding and advice you need. Don't miss this episode; it's packed with valuable strategies and real-life examples to help you navigate the unique challenges of special needs parenting.

Connect with Monica Paneda at Avance (Hub) today!😁
www.avancehub.co
480.382.2604

Avance trainers guide individuals through a circuit of mental health exercises in C2Y to activate awareness towards action for improved self and stress management.

Visit www.specialparent.org and join our community for new episode alerts, show summaries, and The Special Parent Blog!

Follow us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thespecialparentpodcast

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Support the show! Your contribution helps us to continue making new episodes and achieve our goal of reaching as many parents, families, and caregivers of children with special needs as possible, to provide support, guidance, hope, and community!

Visit www.specialparent.org and join our community for new episode alerts, show summaries, and The Special Parent Blog!

Follow us:
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Subscribe to the video podcast! 👇👇
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How would you like to transform your daily stress management into a routine that builds emotional resilience? Join me, Dr. Deanna Iverson, and my incredible guest Monica Pineda, founder of Avance Hub, as we explore mental health "workouts" specifically designed for parents of special needs children. We'll discuss practical, flexible strategies that can be adapted to life’s unpredictable demands, helping you maintain your mental health and set a positive example for your children.

Ever wondered how recognizing your emotional state could change your parenting game? Monica and I break down the importance of stress scales and mental health exercises, showing how these tools can help you become a more responsive, less reactive parent. Learn how to guide your children through emotional regulation using intentional language and create a more supportive home environment that benefits everyone.

Self-compassion and flexibility are essential, especially when your parenting journey involves special needs. We discuss the power of acknowledging your own imperfections and practicing self-forgiveness. Monica shares insights on action-oriented programs like "Connect to Yourself" (C2Y) and the benefits of building a support system. We'll also look at how a strong community, both online and offline, can provide the understanding and advice you need. Don't miss this episode; it's packed with valuable strategies and real-life examples to help you navigate the unique challenges of special needs parenting.

Connect with Monica Paneda at Avance (Hub) today!😁
www.avancehub.co
480.382.2604

Avance trainers guide individuals through a circuit of mental health exercises in C2Y to activate awareness towards action for improved self and stress management.

Visit www.specialparent.org and join our community for new episode alerts, show summaries, and The Special Parent Blog!

Follow us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thespecialparentpodcast

2 Ways to support the show: Your contribution helps us to

Support the Show.

Support the show! Your contribution helps us to continue making new episodes and achieve our goal of reaching as many parents, families, and caregivers of children with special needs as possible, to provide support, guidance, hope, and community!

Visit www.specialparent.org and join our community for new episode alerts, show summaries, and The Special Parent Blog!

Follow us:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thespecialparentpodcast
Instagram: @thespecialparentpodcast

Buzzsprout: https://www.facebook.com/thespecialparentpodcast
Patreon: ...

Speaker 1:

This program is made possible by friends and partners of the Special Parent Podcast.

Speaker 2:

I believe that empowering parents of special needs children is like giving them the superpower of unconditional love and unbreakable determination. They are not just parents, they are true champions shaping a bright future for their incredible children. I'm Dr Deanna Iverson and I'm glad you're here. Welcome everyone to the Special Parent Podcast today. Thank you so much for joining us. Our mission here is to empower parents and inspire them. We want to help you navigate the daily challenges of being a special needs parent, but we want to help you do it with hope and clarity. The joys of being a special needs parent are so unique and so special, so we're building a community of parents that can get together and help each other with everything. Our topic today is improving self self care, excuse me, strengthening our own mental health as parents so we can be stronger for our community and for our children. So I have a special guest here with me today. Hello, monica.

Speaker 3:

How are you, hi, doing? Well, thank you for inviting and having us here.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I'm so excited to have you. So you have started a company that is all about helping people build their own mental health and their own mental strength. So would you tell us a little bit like how did this get started for you?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, for sure. So essentially, avance Hub is for mental health advocacy and really we started it to help people be able to navigate their mental and emotional health every day a little easier. That, even though therapy and coaching and other options that are great, every day we really need to be practicing things that even are just tiny but can help us lead better lives.

Speaker 2:

I love how you said that practicing, because that's one of the things. In one of my previous episodes, when I talked about self-care, I talked about the importance of we have to practice it when we don't need it, so that way, when we need it, it comes naturally to us. So, as special needs parents, every single day sometimes presents a different challenge, so sometimes every single day, we try to find a nugget of time to just take a break and to reset ourselves. So when you started your company and you were really looking at that idea of self-help, you called these workouts. Explain to me a little bit of like what does it mean for it to be a workout?

Speaker 3:

Yes, one of our approaches here with a workout is that it is like circuit training, and so if we think about a physical circuit workout, you go through a series of exercises. And so we thought here, why not have a series of mental health strategies that we could go through in series? That we could go through in series, because oftentimes we do just need to continue practicing and strengthening that practice of what strategy is gonna help us today, knowing that, because of kind of what you just said, right, every day is a little different and the challenges are there, and sometimes they're constant, and our needs, then, are so different, every day too, that a different strategy we might learn and see helps us more than the prior one that isn't going to work today, right.

Speaker 2:

And then the idea also that you can circle back and go. I remember there was that strategy and I think I need that one today Absolutely. That's really nice to be able to do that.

Speaker 3:

Yep, you can hone in and pull them out when you need, and just even having that flexible mindset, knowing that it's okay, if one doesn't work, it may just be another one that's going to be more effective today, right now, for whatever reason, yeah, we don't have to get stuck on the idea that this is the one thing that works for me.

Speaker 2:

It might be the one thing today, but flexible, that's a great one, absolutely. So we're talking about mental health. What does that really mean? To you as a therapist.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I like to think of mental health as literally just our insides and everything that happens inside our inside world it's probably the easiest way for me to say it but, of course, our feelings, our thoughts and our behaviors, how everything on the inside of us kind of comes out externally, on the outside too, and impacts others or our environment and whatnot. And so I think, though, what we're focusing on at Avance, and with mental health specifically, is emotions, because one of the hardest things for a lot of us is what to do with them when they creep up, and we tend to maybe react, and things can get a little harder sometimes, just if we're not able to kind of see oh, look at all these emotions here that I can give space and take care of first.

Speaker 2:

Right, that's true, because our behaviors, thoughts and emotions they do. It's like a little cycle. They all impact each other, they all hang out. Yeah, so if we can really start talking about, like you said, our emotions can just happen to us. Sometimes we're not prepared for them, sometimes we don't understand the trigger and they can just happen to us. And so when that does happen, if we're reacting and I know as a parent, a lot of times I'll get frustrated with a situation and I love my kid to death. But, special needs or not, parenting is tough and sometimes I get frustrated and I've reacted. I mean, I'm human. I actually don't know a single parent who hasn't but we don't want to make that our go-to. We want to be responders, not reactors, and so improving our mental health helps us be a responder.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and a reactor, so that's great. I love that. When you talk about your mental health exercises, do you think there's a group or an individual that you've designed them for that would benefit the most?

Speaker 3:

I think high stress and we're really talking about when you're looking at your stress scale number anywhere from 7 to 10 or especially over a 10, if you're over a 10, I would say, yeah, we've got to be implementing strategies and we've got to be able to know that that's the number we're at, because that's just the first way that we can even tell that we've got to be putting some things into our day to take care of ourselves and start bringing that number down a little bit. We can feel better and we can manage better and parenting can be a little bit lighter that day or that moment.

Speaker 2:

I love that. Like you said, it's about bringing the number down and if we set realistic goals for ourselves, we recognize the number's probably never going to hit a zero and that's okay. That's somewhat normal. But we want to bring it down to a manageable level where it doesn't feel like it's running or controlling our lives and our health and everything else like that.

Speaker 3:

I think it's such an important piece actually to keep in mind how much it ranges like that that maybe one day you're a lot lower, the next day it may be a lot higher, and that even in the same day we can kind of go up and down with where that number's at too.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's true, especially depending on the moment or something happens to us, like you said, you know, the emotions just boom, they're there and that can really take the stress up really high.

Speaker 3:

Or things just pile on and suddenly the challenges and stressors for that day Absolutely Just all accumulated to now. We're at an eight. We're not at a four anymore.

Speaker 2:

I've been there before I remember telling my kids one day mom's checking out for a minute oh that's great, yeah. And about an hour later my husband comes in and goes tag, that's great. Oh my gosh, it was the idea that mom got your checkout. Guess what's my turn.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, yeah, somebody else is tapping in now.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and it was funny, because sometimes when I'm working with my kids and this is what I think as a parent if I can get better at my mental health, then I can model it for them. It's not just about being a better parent, it's also about helping them learn to be better stress managers themselves, absolutely. And so when I tell my kids, I need you to go take a timeout, I don't really mean that as a punishment, I mean that as in, you need to go take care of your health, your mental health for a minute, your stress, that you can manage this better. So a lot of times as a parent, I find that if I just tell them to take a timeout but I don't teach them what that means or how, then they don't know what to do with it either.

Speaker 2:

So, I'm thinking some of the strategies that we're going to learn from you know, you can be something that we can teach our kids to use too.

Speaker 3:

Absolutely. One in particular, I think, is changing whatever the language is that we're using, because they may be thinking timeout and everybody's not on the same page with. Well, that's not what I meant exactly. Or, let's take space, if we said let's practice, and then we both go to the corner, but we're going to practice, you and I are going to go practice that just that can start to change the dynamic too of how we're managing us and how they're managing them, and just that relationships that starts to form between the household and the two of you right.

Speaker 3:

What are we doing? Are we, are we taking time out or are we taking space? Are we practicing? Are we um, practicing, calming, practicing breathing? What are we? What are we doing in that moment and that intentionality?

Speaker 2:

I remember my son has a rare genetic syndrome and it affects behavior a lot, and so at one point we had some frustration going on and we told him to go take a time out in his room. And I remember sitting there and listening to him and while he was in his room he was ramping up Because he was talking himself into getting more angry and so I had to go in there. I couldn't almost take my time out because I had to go in there and be like, okay, this is going the wrong direction.

Speaker 3:

Time out is not working right now.

Speaker 2:

So I love the idea of some strategies, and so I know you said I love the idea of some strategies, and so I know when you said the word practice, I love that because if we wait till we're frustrated to do something, it's not going to work as well as if we practice a little beforehand. So your mental health exercises are to help us practice right and to help us teach our kids to practice before we're stressed Yep, practice right. And to help us teach our kids to practice when before we're stressed Yep, what are some practice strategies that you've, you know, started working on that you would teach people when they're heightened and stressed out?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, Some of the most basics are in grounding.

Speaker 3:

but before we even ground and it can sometimes even be overused, I think when we say it sometimes even be overused, I think, when we say it, but when we truly do it and we notice the effect it has in our bodies, in those moments it's so powerful. But even before then, just to call out and name the situation that's happening, name the emotion, just to slow down they may seem so basic, but most of us skip over those, yes, and to actually name it a strategy, and say let's name this and name it out loud, name it with them. We're now acknowledging and setting again like a base.

Speaker 2:

We're starting at the base here with this, just calling it out, just calling it, and I love that, because a lot of times there's multiple emotions and we get stuck with I'll be honest, in our family we get stuck with anger and there's so many things that led to the anger. The anger is not even the problem. It becomes the problem.

Speaker 2:

If we're reacting, that's right, but it's not the actual problem. So solving the anger doesn't solve the problem, and so I love that you said that, naming what's really happening right now, and that's a good practice.

Speaker 3:

It is going back to the practice piece of it too. When we're doing that, we're getting back to the core of hold on. Before all the anger, what was I really trying to do here, or what was I trying to accomplish? Where did this go wrong? Right, I have a need, you had a need, and somewhere we did not match up.

Speaker 2:

Right.

Speaker 3:

So if we can go back to that of, well, I'm exhausted, that's why I can't go get the water bottle, yeah, or I'm tired today, yeah, just where is it at the core? Of what each party here is trying to gather and get.

Speaker 2:

Right, and I think it's so important because so many people. It's just a communication breakdown that then leads to, especially between parents and adults, because we don't see things. It could be generational, could be whatever it is, but we don't see things necessarily from the same perspective. No, and then we end up with that communication breakdown and the ball rolls downhill and then we're in a fight. Yes, big argument.

Speaker 3:

We just missed going back to wait. What are your needs and what are my needs during this moment? We each have needs and if we go back to those, we can probably meet your needs and my needs.

Speaker 2:

Yes, One of the things I noticed when I've been on your site and gone through some of the stuff. So you talk about self-compassion and so you just talked about our needs. Self-compassion is something that I think is becoming something we hear about a little bit more, but it's so important. So will you explain what is self-compassion?

Speaker 3:

Absolutely Self-compassion is simply having kindness for yourself, having compassion for yourself, being able to actually care about you and take a step back and give yourself that grace that you also need in your moments, in your life, in your day. That it's okay, that it's really okay. We don't have to feel guilty or beat ourselves up for things, even when we do mess up.

Speaker 2:

Yeah that's a good one, and it's funny how we're sometimes willing to give that more to other people and we're harder on ourselves at times and I think as parents we do that. As parents special needs parents, regular parents, any parent we see our own flaws and a lot of times we're really critical of ourselves about that. And if we practice self-compassion, what we're teaching our kids is it's okay to be human, you're a human, this is part of the humanness of us all. And if we can model that for them and I would say, maybe even after a conflict, coming back together and being able to say this is what I did wrong and I'm going to forgive myself for that, something to that effect where you model for them the ability to say it's okay to be human and love each other again, oh my goodness, Absolutely no-transcript these moments, right, because?

Speaker 2:

we as parents, we're still learning too, and sometimes I think our kids want to see us as being. Since we are the authority figure, we're supposed to know how to do it all. And it's not that we don't know. But sometimes we have to relearn and that's why we practice. And when things change in our lives, absolutely when things change we have to relearn a skill sometimes or re, re is not the right one there, but figure out again how to do something that maybe we, just Over time, hadn't needed anymore.

Speaker 3:

There's a constant problem solving as a parent. And as a parent with a child with special needs, there's a constant problem. Solving of this moment may be different, this challenge may be different and, in general for parenting, every age and stage is different. So, you're constantly learning weight and your child is different as they continue and they're growing Ages, stages, multiple kids. Yes.

Speaker 1:

You're changing.

Speaker 3:

They're changing, environment's changing.

Speaker 2:

Yes, all the time Daily is changing, Especially if you travel with your kids or if you take your kids to new experiences and new places then there's no way sometimes to predict what they're going to do. In fact, there's no way to predict what they're going to do at home. Fact, there's no way to predict what they're going to do at home. No, so we feel like we're constantly responding and changing all the time, this flex.

Speaker 3:

Going back to that flexibility we talked about, I think this is why flexibility and self-compassion as you practice skills and strategies, but honestly, as we just live life is so important to have as a foundation of. Let me introduce these two components, just flexibility and self-compassion as strategies in the day, as the day kind of happens, keeping both of those in mind, Right With any, you know, strategy or no strategy.

Speaker 1:

If you're like.

Speaker 3:

I don't know what skills to use today. All I know is let me go back to being kind to myself and being flexible with this next moment.

Speaker 2:

Yes, and that's one of the things Avance helps is teach us how to make that a regular practice in our lives, and you said that your workouts are action oriented, so you're teaching us how to play this out. What does that look like when it's action oriented?

Speaker 3:

That's right.

Speaker 3:

So one of the differences with our circuit C2Y it's connect to yourself the program is that as you go through the series it's designed to be experiential, which is you are in practice as you go through each exercise, and so we absolutely prompt you to engage in the strategy, to do the exercise while you're with us and to continue to learn from that moment of you in your exercise, knowing that if you came back a different day to do a circuit or a workout, that your experience will be different Because in that moment you have other things within you that you may notice.

Speaker 3:

Your experience of a strategy may be a little different that day, maybe because you've already practiced them or not, but you'll continue to notice the shift, and I think that's one of the main components for us is that people continue to notice how they shift internally and how they shift every day, even if we practice nothing, and then, especially when we do practice strategies, that we see that they actually work, yeah, and when you're putting them in play, then you go back and you take whether you retake the same one same circuit again, or you take what would be the next circuit.

Speaker 2:

You're building because you have a skill and now you're going to build on that skill, et cetera. It's like basketball players they make more shots outside of the game than they do in the game. Why so that way? When they're in the game, when they're in the stress, it's automatic and they're just doing it.

Speaker 3:

Oh, that's beautiful. I loved that when they're in the stress, it's automatic and they're just doing it. Oh, that's beautiful. I loved that, yeah. So, yeah, I'm going to have to start to use that one. I'm going to have to start to use that one.

Speaker 2:

So we've talked about some different strategies. When we talk about systems of support, a little bit because we're trying to build a community. How can you know Advance? Help them with that too with that system of support.

Speaker 3:

I like to think of us as a system of support. One of the things we do is offer discovery sessions and if we're not necessarily the resource or tool for them at this time, because of the design we have or what their needs are, we're always connecting people to other resources that may be available in the community or the larger networks that be but aside from us, or that. I would generally say that community and seeking your support system is probably necessary in so many different levels, whether it is networks and organizations and services that people offer, having a variety of different levels of support with friends, with family, with individuals that maybe are just more acquaintances, but the more that you have a variation or a variety right of support levels.

Speaker 3:

You can kind of tap in and it kind of just keep going back to flexibility, but you can have more choices for where to go and who to talk to and match them to what the needs might be for you that month, that year.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, as your needs change as things change.

Speaker 3:

I think it just really goes back to figuring out what are my needs now and when do they change? Because when they change I need to seek something different, not maybe use the same support group that might not actually be the most helpful for the current need.

Speaker 2:

That's a really key insight. I love that when we start to see our needs change, it's important to also, in a sense, reevaluate our support systems and the fact that there's levels. You hit on some two really good points there. Levels of support systems Not everybody has to be the best friend, not everybody needs to be available every time you need to call. There's different levels of support systems and then, as our needs change, as life evolves, we have to analyze for ourselves okay, what is it that we really need right now, and is this support system going to gain an importance? Stay the same, shrink? Do I need to incorporate or try to find a new support system? That's really important.

Speaker 3:

I think if we take an objective approach to it, it can help us. If we analyze it like this, an evaluation kind of mode of like wait a minute, is this still helpful? Just the same way with the strategies instead of where most of us will probably say, oh my gosh, it's me, I'm not doing something right here. But if we just take an objective approach, it's not oftentimes just us or us at all Right, it's just that the system of our life right then may have different needs.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's true, it's true. And as our kids change, I mean, I remember there was a really good friend of mine from childhood that when my son was in the hospital she visited me and there was a night that you know, she just sat there and I like curled up and cried, you know, because just all this stress and everything. He was sleeping in the little hospital crib and I was crying on the mommy couch with my, with my girlfriend who was just holding me, um, and then. But then I have another friend who's there for all the practical things. I call her and she'll listen to me, but then she'll also be like, all right, so now you're gonna stop crying about it and you need to tell me what we're going to do.

Speaker 2:

You know, so she's just a little bit, just a different friend. And sometimes you're right, I need the cry friend that's just going to pat me on the back and snuggle me, but I need the friend who's going to be like all right, get over yourself, put your big girl panties on, let's go, let's move on. Yeah, let's get it together. So it's it's so good to have people in different areas and that's one of the points of getting a community. In multiple communities and some of them, you may never meet the people that could be online communities. There's nothing wrong with that right Absolutely, and I think people are nervous about that as long as you're not putting your personal info out there.

Speaker 3:

Right and there's some that you can participate anonymously and, for example, that's us.

Speaker 3:

You can participate anonymously and you can join us. We have different options throughout the day, Monday through Friday, and so our program, for example, is a little bit more daily or supportive in that sense, even though it's not necessarily like a one-to-one sitting. And so, again, going back to what is out there, what does it look like If it's a one-on-one sitting? What are the options for those? How frequent are those? Maybe it's not the one-on-one option and you're thinking a workout or a check-in may be helpful just to practice some skills. And so all these different options that exist, even if we don't necessarily use them, but we know, just like the strategies, we just know that, oh yeah, that's there, so that when something is challenging, we can go to our list of options and look at some of them Our toolbox in a sense and just go call on them.

Speaker 2:

Yes, our menu, our toolbox, whatever they want to call it. Call on them. Yes, our menu, our toolbox, whatever they want to call it.

Speaker 2:

It is more comforting sometimes just to have that there, to know you have a list of that so and that does give hope when we're frustrated and we're trying to find the joy of that special needs parenting that day, to be able to say, okay, I can go and I can do these things for myself, that's going to build hope for I'm going to handle it right and then that's going to help me find the joy, because it's going to help me reset my emotions, get my thoughts in order and help me line up all those kinds of things.

Speaker 3:

It gives just enough space, maybe for that next moment, that next day. And once you get a little bit of space or a little bit of rest or a little bit of a break, we tend to feel a little better, like we can handle things again. We can do this, we can get through this.

Speaker 2:

And that builds our strength. But it also then relates to our happiness. Yeah, and you know, it's one of the things that I think is hard sometimes when, as a special needs parent, when I interact with the world and I see, you know, even on social media, I'll see people, you know, look at my kid doing this or look at my kid doing that, and sometimes that can highlight what your child's not ever going to be able to do, Right, you know, physically, mentally, behaviorally, whatever it is, you know career wise, those kinds of things, and that that can hurt as a parent and that really just hits home. It hits right, right in the heart. And so to keep that happiness going, you know, that's where those mental health exercises can help us too is really the core of that.

Speaker 3:

Well, it shifts that focus and it shifts those emotions that we're having in those when we're coming across that right. Yes, and then going back to what we can do in our lives with our kids.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it absolutely does. I remember my oldest son has autism, so my middle son's, the one with rare genetic syndrome called KBG, my oldest son has autism. And I remember one day I saw this piece of paper that was cut and I was like, oh, that's weird. And as I was walking into my bathroom for something I don't remember now, and as I'm walking in, I noticed something else that was thicker than a piece of paper was cut and I was like, well, I kept on walking. All of a sudden there was a stage, a series, a series of five items and they were in a row of things that were cut and they got increasingly thicker and more challenging to cut. What they were did not matter to him, it was the sensory feedback, and it took a lot of reframing my thoughts and my emotions because it was my makeup bag.

Speaker 1:

It was my husband's shoe.

Speaker 2:

It was a couple other things and I almost was like why would you destroy our stuff? Right, and then I had to stop myself and go. You didn't destroy our stuff. He was very focused on that sensory feedback, yeah, and my immediate reaction was, no, all the training that you have, if you'd asked anybody else, you should punish him and he'll never do it again. And it was like that's not going to work because that's not solving the problem of the sensory feedback. So it took that reframing my thoughts, swallowing my emotions in the moment to sit my son down and have a conversation with him a little bit. I laid all the items out and he just was completely unaware of how that impacted us. First of all, there's the autism part, right, I?

Speaker 3:

was just going to say what, um, how the two different realities coexist, right, they're in intentions with what they're doing, which has no intention to, to what the outcome was for the parent especially, and usually is like that was that for the parent especially, and usually is like that damaged my stuff, yes, but not ever really the kid's intention or thought process of like, oh, I'm damaging so-and-so's stuff, Yep, that those two are like almost two separate things. Kid does X activity for X reason, you know that's one, yep. And then parent, you know, has an experience with their stuff.

Speaker 2:

It's almost as if they're two separate situations and they really are, and that's one of those moments where you know I can toot, toot my own horn. I was able to keep my emotions in check and actually analyze it, but of course there's many moments where I did not, and other things.

Speaker 3:

That right there takes so much practice and work. So to be conscious in the moment, to bring that up and say, oh, wait a minute, to slow ourselves down, to not react to them and what just happened, which is usually messy or damaging to something, right, right, like kudos, because, yeah, it's energy, it's practice, it's energy, yeah, it is practice to do that and and not that.

Speaker 2:

You know, everything's been great since then. I've definitely had my moments where I have not kept my cool All of us Right. So keeping keeping our mental health in check helps us have more cool moments than bare moments.

Speaker 3:

And even in the challenging moments, right, just to even say like, oh you know what, putting this in perspective, taking a step back, that we can problem solve it instead of just reacting, because, at the end of the day, there's probably something that needs to be solved with whatever happened here and our energy towards solving. It is going to just be more productive, exactly.

Speaker 2:

Energy towards solving it. Right, I love that. Yeah, when we can learn to really use that self-compassion and get in touch with our emotions, because emotions are energy. That's why they have to be let out. That's a lot of times where that anger comes from. It's trying to let them out. Absolutely, and if we can learn a way to channel that energy into a solution rather than to create a bigger problem, we're going to help ourselves, help our kids, help everyone around us yeah.

Speaker 1:

So tell me a little bit.

Speaker 2:

So tell me a little bit. You said that, with Advance Hub for us and anyone that's going to watch the podcast that you had a special deal because you would like us to be able to reach out to you guys, absolutely. So tell us how to get a hold of you.

Speaker 3:

Yes, yes, yes. Well, you can check out our website at avancehubco. And we will have that on our website too, so it will all be there. Awesome, you can schedule a discovery session for free on there too, and just get connected with us. See if it may be a good fit for what your needs are in the moment and for your listeners here who reach out if they would like to try out a workout for free.

Speaker 3:

we are offering a trial period for a workout and also a discount of 25% off for the month, and what we do is we have a monthly fee and people are able to come as is convenient and accessible to them during the month.

Speaker 2:

That's nice to know, because then you don't have to think, oh, I need to get on and I need help right now, but I don't have the extra $10. It's like it's nope. It's a flat monthly fee and you can get on and you can use the services as needed. That brings a lot of comfort and stability probably to a lot of people. I know what it does to me. I mean, that's how I look at it.

Speaker 3:

Our intention is to kind of just make it easier to join and, knowing that our aim is to give more value than what the cost, is Absolutely.

Speaker 2:

I love that. Well, we'll definitely have all of your information on our resources page on our website and I'll make sure to send you links too, so you can send them out also for this podcast, so you can use that as a little bit for you too. Absolutely, thank you so much. Thank you, monica, so much for joining me. I really appreciate you being here today. Yes, it was a pleasure, thank you.

Speaker 1:

Have a good rest of your day. Thank you, you too. This program is made possible by friends and partners at the Special Parent Podcast. For more information and to join our mailing list, visit specialparentorg.

Empowering Special Needs Parents Through Self-Care
Strategies for Managing Mental Health
Parenting Strategies for Self-Compassion
Navigating Special Needs Parenting Challenges