Send us a Text Message.
The Ten Commandments for Self Improvement
In this episode of the Self Relativity Podcast, Dr. Vahey Ohanessian deep dives into the Ten Commandments for Self Improvement, a guide to enhance personal growth effectively and sustainably. The episode outlines essential principles starting with the importance of desire and introspection, followed by embracing a centered self, promoting factual thinking, and minimizing negativity. It further emphasizes the value of independence, control, self agency, forming complementary relationships, understanding abundance, and embracing change. Each commandment is aimed at guiding listeners towards a self-improvement journey by focusing on self-reflection, personal responsibility, and making proactive decisions to better one's life. Dr. Rohanessian combines these commandments with practical insights to help listeners navigate their improvement journey more efficiently.
00:00 Introduction to Self Improvement
00:34 The First Commandment: Desire and Introspection
01:31 The Second Commandment: Self First and Centered Self
01:55 The Third Commandment: Factual Thinking
03:02 The Fourth Commandment: Minimize Negativity
04:10 The Fifth Commandment: Independence and Self-Reliance
04:47 The Sixth Commandment: Control and Certainty
05:35 The Seventh Commandment: Self Agency and Personal Responsibility
06:22 The Eighth Commandment: Complementary, Not Completing
07:12 The Ninth Commandment: Abundance and Choice
08:09 The Tenth Commandment: Embracing Change
08:58 Conclusion and Next Episode Preview
✅ Follow Self Relativity on your favorite podcast platform and listen to a new episode every week!
📝 Don’t forget to share your thoughts on the episode in the comments below.
🔔 Join us in our mission at The Leadership Project and learn more about our organization here: https://linktr.ee/selfrelativity
https://selfrelativity.com/
📕 You can purchase a copy of Dr. Vahe’s Ohanessian’s book “Theory of Self Relativity as an eBook or paperback at Amazon,
If you would like a signed copy, please reach to drvaheo@gmail.com and we can arrange it for you too.
#SelfRelativity
Dr. Vahé Ohanessian
Welcome to the Self Relativity Podcast. I am your host, Dr. Vahé Ohanessian. At Self Relativity, we believe to feel good, you must think well. In this episode, we're going to be talking about the Ten Commandments for Self Improvement. In the last episode, we discussed the Ten Enemies of Self Improvement, which are things that hinder and prohibit self improvement.
In this episode, we'll be talking about the Ten Commandments for Self Improvement, which are the things that will help us improve better and quicker. The first commandment for self improvement is desire and introspection, which is also known as the non negotiables for self improvement. In order for us to be able to improve, we must first want to improve, and we must secondly know what needs improvement.
Therefore, we must have the desire to improve, and secondly, we must be able to identify what needs improvement. If one doesn't have the desire to improve, then no self improvement system could help the person. However, most of us that are right now listening to this podcast are already here because we want to improve.
Therefore, I don't think that it should be an issue for us to want to improve. And once we have that desire, then we need to be able to look within to see what are the things that need improvement. That is when introspection and self reflection come in, so that we can identify our weaknesses, we can face them, and we can resolve them so that we can move on from the difficulties that are holding us back.
The second commandment for self improvement is self first and centered self. Centered self means we bring the focus onto ourselves before we do so for other people. Although centered self and self centered both prioritize the self first, unlike self centered or selfish, centered self does not do it at the expense of other people or without consideration for other people.
The third commandment for self improvement is factual thinking. Factual thinking is a term that's been coined by self relativity to show how we think and how we should evaluate each individual thought. When we have a thought, an idea, or an opinion that we think has value, that thought, idea, or opinion becomes a belief.
And a belief is a mindset that we are assuming, or we're convinced to be true, but we're not sure if it's true. In order for us to ensure that that belief that we have is true and factual, we need to be able to find the supported facts in order to turn that belief into knowledge. For example, if we believe that someone else is doing something to us, or someone else is thinking something about us, we might think or assume that it is true, but we don't know for sure if it is.
Therefore, we need to be able to find the supportive facts, for example, ask them what they're thinking about it, so that then we can parallel ourselves with what reality is and not what we feel or think reality to be. The fourth commandment for self improvement is to minimize negativity. Although our goal is to increase our happiness, we must realize that because of two major issues.
One, the way that our mind operates. And two, the way that our surrounding universe is, negativity is the default state of our existence. Therefore, in order for us to be able to experience longer and more frequent happiness, we must first be able to face the negativities that are affecting our lives so that we can resolve or eliminate them and then get on our path of experiencing longer lasting happiness.
The difference between minimizing negativity and positive psychology Is that we need to focus on what is causing some of our negativities, and we need to resolve or eliminate the causes of our negativities so that then we can be on a stronger path to positivity. Because if we only think positive thoughts while the negativities are remaining, then the positivity will only become a cover up to the negativity, and that negativity will re resurface at a later time.
The fifth commandment for self-improvement is independence and self-reliance. And this is the opposite of one of the enemies of self improvement, which was dependency and reliance. Independence and self reliance is so important because we want to be able to live our life from a centered self position.
Which means that we want to be able to make decisions for ourselves so that we can set our borders and boundaries of how we relate with other people. If we are not independent and self reliant, then we are giving more rights to people for them to make decisions for us and to be able to influence our life.
The sixth commandment for self improvement is control and certainty. And this is another one of the self improvement commandments. That is the opposite of what a self improvement enemy is, which is lack of control and uncertainty. Although there is no such thing as absolute certainty, the goal of certainty is to minimize uncertainty and to increase our control over matters that are influencing our lives.
When we reduce uncertainty, then we reduce worry, anxiety, stress, and even fear. Therefore, by having more control, we are able to make more decisions in our life, and we are able to guide our life in the direction that it needs to go. Hence, we minimize uncertainty, and we increase our control. The 7th commandment for self improvement is self agency and personal responsibility.
Self agency and personal responsibility brings the focus back to ourselves so that we can look within ourselves to see what are the things that we can improve instead of looking externally to see how others can help us. Or to blame other people or other things for the difficulties that we are having.
If we are focusing and looking at what we're doing, we will always recognize that no matter what happens in our life, whether it is negative or often if it's positive, we are central to what is going on in our life. Therefore, by bringing the focus on ourselves and taking on the personal responsibility, To improve our lives, we will be in control of what is going on in our life.
The eighth commandment for self improvement is complementary, not completing. This is especially important in our interactions and relationships with other people, be it personal, business, or other social. We need to be complete on our own, and the people that we deal with need to be complete on their own, so that when we come together in an interaction or a relationship, we are additive to each other.
We are not completing each other. Hence, any relationship that becomes deductive, where we have to give something up in order to preserve the relationship, that is not a healthy relationship. A healthy relationship is a relationship that is additive, because all the entities involved in that relationship are complete on their own.
The ninth commandment for self improvement is abundance and choice. What abundance and choice means is that we want to be able to be in a position in our life We have an abundance of choices to choose from. In order to do that, we need to be able to improve ourselves first so that we have a higher social value.
In the book, I have created a term called relative personal value, which means that how we are evaluated socially and by other people in terms of the value that bring, we bring on. For example, if we're higher educated, if we have good skills, then we have a higher social value, which means we will be in higher demand.
If we are in higher demand, then we have more choices and more options in life to choose from. Therefore, abundance and choice is a direct reflection of the improvements that we can do for ourselves. In order to increase our desirability in the communities. The 10th commandment for self improvement is change.
Change is the only consistent constant. Change occurs all the time, with ourselves, with everyone else, and with everything else in the universe. Therefore, if change occurs, we need to be able to move along, parallel with change, so we learn to change. We don't like change, because change can expose us to variables and uncertainties.
And variables and uncertainties could cause things to go wrong. That is why our mind does not like change. Because our mind wants to keep us safe. However, we must learn to proactively adapt to change so that we can be one step ahead of the change that will be coming to our life. And we have more control over how things change instead of us being affected by how things change.
You've been listening to the Self Relativity Podcast. In this episode, we covered the 10 commandments for self improvement. And in the next episode, we will be covering the 10 things that a self improvement system must have.