Welcome to the inspirational devotions new segment called My Peace, where we showcase guests who highlight a piece of themselves with the hope of inspiring others to find internal peace.
I’m Dr. L.T. Dreher and today I’m joined by Diane Parker, my caring, thoughtful, and extremely wise mother; she is one of the most spiritual, yet down-to-earth persons I know. If you need to pour your heart out and receive empathy, honesty, and wisdom, she is the person. She has a heart of Gold. I’ve witnessed her go into the trenches to not only ensure individuals and families are fed and cared for, but their pets as well. She is the type who will give the clothes off her back and her last to ensure others are okay.
Her life has been like an entire action-packed motion picture, but somehow she managed to gracefully survive and thrive beyond all of the trials and tribulations to becoming a mother and minister in her church. In her inspirational piece, she guides us through her life experiences, the importance of loving thy neighbor, how she was able to overcome addiction, her unconditional and untiring love for God and family, and encouraging words to her struggling peers; our precious wise and mature community.
I am excited to learn more about her passions and how she prevailed through horrific and hopeless situations to becoming a loving wife, an excellent mother, and an outstanding grand/great grand mother to her generation. It is my honor to offer her the opportunity to inspire others by speaking Godly, yet relatable wisdom into their lives.
Sitting here right now with my mother, Diane Parker. The woman who raised me and who gave me life and who kept me in church from day one. So church was her life, is her life, and will always be her life. But, she is herself. She was always--she is the realest person I know and will always be. Now, some people--they can’t handle her. Some people, but the people who know her, they love her. So anyhow, I just wanted to introduce you to my mother and we want to have a little conversation right now about church because it's a huge part of her life and she is, what I call, and she doesn't like for me to say this, but I call a street minister. And the reason why I say that is because, I don't care who you are, or what you look like, or what you've done, my mother has a gift and has been blessed to be able to walk up to that person and speak life into their life and so that's why I call her a street minister. She would love on them. She'll give them what they need. She would advise them. She would do everything that they need and she allows God to use her as a vessel in their life. So, I just want to allow her to speak to you to let you know how she feels about a young person, what they call babes in Christ that's trying to find God and they come into the church and they end up running into either judgment or chaos or things like that and it turns them away from the church because of it. She's been there and so she understands it, but she didn't allow her. She didn't allow that to keep herself out of the church because she knew it wasn't about her and the church, she knew it was about her and God. So, now I'm going to turn it over to my dear mother, Minister Diane Parker. So, mama, what do you have to say as far as about that babe that's coming into church and they, you know, dressed a certain way and they get those looks and things like that? What would you say to that, that babe? Well, God says to come as you are, but he doesn't mean your clothes. He means your heart. Whatever you're doing, if you're a drug addict, come to church, whatever you're doing that you think is wrong, come to church and the more you come to church, either you're going to stay there in the name of the Lord or you're going to go back out to what you're doing. But don't come to church, expecting to be hugged and kissed and loved all the time because church people are just like outdoor people. They have their feelings. Sometimes you may come and they may be low in spirit, but you come there to serve God, not them. Never them. You don't come there to serve the pastor. You come to listen to him, but you come there to serve God. That way, even if you're not in church, you can still serve God. You can serve him in your bed, in your front room, in your kitchen. You can serve him anywhere you go if he's in your heart. You don't need nobody. That's right, nobody but God. Nobody but God. Okay, so did you ever run into a situation when you, like, either came to church for the first time or if you had left church, what they call backsliding, which is, I don't like that term, but what they call backsliding and you knew that, you know, you just wanted to get back to God, get back on track and things like that. Have you ever come back to church and experience things that made you feel uncomfortable? And if so, how did you handle it? I just kept my mind on God. Well, first, I want to say, I want you to talk about as far as, was it your first time or was it you coming back? It's was coming back. Okay, so you had been out a while--I want you to explain. Well, for one, I had to learn that going to church does not make me have my relationship with God that I needed. So if I had a relationship with God, if I don't go to church, I can still go to church because church is in your heart. How do you go to church outside of church? I turn my TV on. First, I get in my Bible and I pray and I turn the TV to religious music. And after I pray, I start singing and it's just, this is like, can go on to the next day. But I'm in church. That's that minister in her the whole next day. Okay. But I'm in church. That's right. Church is in me. That's right. Okay. And secondly, I have been blessed. My mother hasn't had an easy life. I mean, she has had one of the rough, a rough and a rough life. And most people, even though she's the baby of the family, most people thought she would be the one going first. But here she is. All the other ones are gone. Most of them. But she's still here. She's 75 years old and she is hanging in there and living her best life. When I tell you, she travels, she plays bingo. She, she, she loves her church, but she does other things. She loves doing other things. Ummm, Mama, if you had to encourage someone else that's 75 or older and they're feeling like life is over. Life is over. What would you say to them? Life's never over as long as you’re living. And you can get up out of your bed, then you can do practically anything that you set your mind to. And what keeps you going when you get out of bed in the morning? And, you know, you're just kind of sitting around because you're retired and you don't have, you know, you don't have to go to work, you know, things like that. Is it the passions that you have? What are some of the passions that you have that keep you going? I like cleaning. I love cleaning. I'm retired from that also. What about shopping? Oh, no. I have to pray about that. But you do love shopping, right? I try to buy the whole store. I don't even look at the size sometimes. I come home with clothes too little clothes too big. I don forgot to look at the size. What about traveling? That's what I'm, like, what are some of the things that you just absolutely love doing that gives you life? I love traveling. I don't like to plane, but I love traveling. Yeah. It's just other places are different. Art work. I love to draw. And paint. And paint. And I took some pictures up here that I'm thinking about getting enlarged and putting in frames. They are silhouettes. See, now she's being humble because she actually went to school for art. So, she's an artist. So, she's the type that can see something outside and all of a sudden just start dibbling, dabbling and drawing and before you know it, she done drew what y'all just saw. You know, and so, this, I think, is what kind of keeps her up and going. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Along with the other things. I want to see other parts of the world. Everything's different. Everybody's different. So, if you see one of those people that's, or an elderly person that's struggling and having a hard time and they feel like, I've already lived part of my life, you know, and they're getting depressed and they're not doing their passions, what would you tell them? You'd be surprised what's out here for seniors. Look in your paper, they got cruises for seniors. Everything is a lot for seniors now. Go on the cruise. Right. Just travel. You got kids all over the world. Go and see your kids before you leave this world. Mm-hmm. It's so much to do. You may think you're through, but you got a lot to do. Yeah. There's so much you can do especially if you have good health. Mm-hmm. And what makes you have good health is to keep moving. Right. Keep moving. Now, for those who may have bad health, have somebody help you move. Don't be afraid to ask, right? Don't be afraid to ask. I need to go on the plane. I can't walk. They’ll have to wheelchair waiting for you. Mm-hmm. I can't do my medicine and remember it. Ask somebody to do that, right? Help you with that. You can ask a stranger to help you with your medicine. Right. What do they say on there? Right. Every four hours or every six hours. Hey, ask. Right. You never know unless you ask. Okay. As I mentioned before, my mother's life wasn't easy. And so, she ended up, you know, with an addiction, things like that, like, quite a few people. But, instead of me judging her, looking down on her, it actually made me admire her and admire her wisdom and experience that she got from it because with me, at least, because we had a wonderful personal relationship. She was able to teach me a lot, things to do, things not to do. And she would talk with me. And so, it helped me to not only understand, you know, and to not be judgmental, but to understand people who may be going through addictions, you know, and just things like that. And how to love them, regardless. And so, I just want her to talk a little bit about, you know, umm how some of the things she went through, how she came out of it, and just a few other things about it. So, Mom, like I was saying, we know that you, you know, had a pretty hard life, you know, and sometimes, and we just cannot be perfect. So, sometimes we fall into some bad times, do some things we may not suppose to do or whatever. However, it is what it is, right? Right. So, I want you to talk a little bit about what you went through, some of the emotions, some of the things you felt while you, you know, was going through that. When I was into addiction, it is just like anything else, it is a habit that you can't break. It's like someone you left and they won't let you go. And it's not going to let you go. You have to let it go. And the way you let it go, you have to believe in something else. And that belief has to overpower what you're doing in order for you to come out. Wow. And how do you feel? You feel lonely. You feel like no one loves you. You want to know where is everybody at? Why are they're not coming over? You know why, but that's how you feel. And then, a lot of times, when you do come around, how do people treat you? Like you wasn't there when they needed you. So why should they be here when you need them? Yeah. When you got people like I had the love of my children and of God that's waiting, just waiting for me. It helped me to stay sober longer because I had love. And that's what you need. That's what you're missing. That's what you're pushing away is that love. Who wants to knock on your door? And you come to the door looking every way but at them. No one. So everyone stays away. It's a lonely life. And you don't want to go into it. So how living that lonely life and feeling like you all alone, did you ever at any time feel like Jesus? Like, oh God, why are you forsaking me? You're supposed to love me. Why am I having to go through this thing that I can't seem to kick? Did you ever feel that way? Yeah, but he can't let you kick it until you are ready. You have to be ready to kick it. So you thought it, you think it was for a purpose that you had to go through that? I think it was something I chose and I had to choose to come out of it. Okay. And I prayed to God while in it. Right. I prayed…let this be my last time. I prayed. And I guess he heard me. I guess he heard me while I listened. Or you didn't stop until he did. Right. Yeah. Where some people, some people give up on God. You know, I had a time in my life where I literally gave up on God. I turned my back on him. You know, and so not everybody will be able to kick addiction because instead of them not giving up, they will give up. You know, and so. But you got to have a higher power. It may not be God. It can be your children. It can be any, it can be food. It can be your dog. It can be your sport. Right. Whatever that higher power is, that's what you're going to go into more than you going into the addiction in order to kick it. That's good. That's good. And that's the only way you will be able to kick it. You have to convince yourself. So for those that feel like they have someone in their lives who has someone in their life who has an addiction, what would you tell, who has an addiction, but they like, they don't give up on them because they feel like they're never going to. They're just constantly getting over on me and stealing from me and doing, you know, they're never going to give up on the addiction. So now they give up on them. What would you tell them? Don't say never. If you stand by them, if you talk to them, you have to talk to them and stay by them. And eventually your presence will win over the addiction. And their love. And their love for you and they'll come out. But don't give up on them, never. If you give up on them, they'll give up on themself. Oh my God. That's facts. That's wisdom. That's wisdom right there. Umm, and last, as far as your life, I've been constantly telling them that you've lived a full life, not all good, not all bad, but a full life. Would you like to give a testimony about your life starting, I would say, from the beginning. And I'll say a little bit just to get you started, but my mom, at a very young age, lost her dad and she had four brothers and sisters. And her mom was a homemaker. And it just literally tore her life apart, tore their life apart. Because now, of course, mom had to go out and work. And she had the kids and she had the older brother. And she was the baby. So everybody was older than her and it seemed like it was nothing but chaos because everybody was trying to figure everything out. So mom, can you tell me, going back to then, what your life was like and from then on to moving forward to now. Step by step. So go back to you, Soupie, Arnold, Jeanie and grandma, Audrey. Well, like she said, life was chaos and there was lots of turmoil. I was being fought almost 24 hours a day, locked in closets, and thrown down steps. Just everything. And the only thing that would come to my mind was, Where is my mom? Where's my mom? Don't she love me? Where's my mom? That's all I would ask. Where's my mom? You know. But mom was out trying to feed six kids breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I don't know how she did it, but she did it. Some days we had peanut butter sandwiches. Some days sugar sandwiches. Some days mayonnaise sandwiches. So, you know, it's just... It was hard. I mean, we didn't go hungry. We ate six loads of bread. Yeah. And so, once you turned 17, 18, don't go that far. Once you turn 17, 18, what was your mindset at that point after living, going through all of that? Going through all of that chaos, I left home at 13. I went to live with my sister. I left there because of problems. And I just felt like there was no no place in life for me to go. But then I remember that I could go to God. As a young child, I could go to God. And that's where I went. And that's how I got a hold of life. Did you meet any people on the way? Like, at what point did you meet your Godmother? I was with her mother and I met her and I found out she was a church lady. So, I cling to her. And she helped me throughout my life. When I was in my addiction, she raised my kids. I don't know if it was the best, but she raised them. And it's like God sent me godly people. When I still was in my addiction, I had a deacon that raised my kids. It was all godly people. So God did. God was there for me. I didn't see it, but he was there. And you would ask him like, where are you? But he was there the whole time. I'm here. I'm here. That's what he would tell me. So I'm here waiting for you. You were mentioning to me when you kind of were in the trenches that even then he sent godly people to you to try to get you to go into church. And you were like, wait, what? Did you think you were worthy? Not then. When I was doing wrong, I didn't think I was worthy. I still would talk to him. I still would pray. But I didn't think I was worthy, but I was. What changed? You are worthy. Oh, yeah. What changed your mind? My kids, my love, love for my kids. Yeah, so. Love for my family. I love family. All of that changed me because I wanted to be with them and not in the addiction. And I wanted to be with God and not in the addiction. So I had lots of high powers, which it is nice to have more than one and that's what changed my life. I stayed around godly people. He kept me around his people. And so when you came back, did you think your kids were going to accept you? What was your train of thought? What was your plan? Well, back then, your plan is just to be smothered in the love you have that wasn’t there and hope that will keep you out of it. The love cause my kids. They never. They didn't forsake me or leave me, they just backed up because I wasn't answering the phone. I wasn't answering the door. So why keep coming? Right. But when I start answering the phone and door, they start coming back to me. So once again, you went right back to never give up. Never give up. No. There's always someone out there that loves you. Okay. So that moment came when you ended up accepting the love, they ended up accepting you. Everything was, you know, not perfect, but it came to a point where you no longer needed that addiction. Right. Your life had turned around. You ended up closer with your higher power. At that point, at that point, that could be even looked at as now. From the trenches that you were in to where you are right now. What can you say to encourage that person that's in that trench right now as far as the path that you had to go to get from there to where you are now? What would you tell them besides never giving up? Always. Like what did you, what are some of the things you did, even when you went back and thought about it? You know, and just things like that. What would you tell them? Just always believe, I don't care how deep you get, always keep it in your mind that someone out there still loves you. Better than the addiction. Don't let the addiction love you. So right now, what is that life that you're living right now? Because when I see you, I feel like you're living your best life. So, from then to now, how are you living? Right now, I still love my kids. I don't care if they go to Africa, I'll be there. I love my kids. To be around them, it just gives me so much joy to be around them and see how their lives are. And next to God, my kids are next in my life and in my heart and I'll do anything to be around them. And your family in general, your kids? The whole family. The kids, grandkids, great grandkids, grandsons. I just love them all. I'll do anything to be around all of them. So that means I have to travel here in the world and there in the world. And Chicago, just to be around my family. Right. I love family. Yeah. So to those who will say, well, I'm too old to travel, what would you tell them? Get somebody to take you? That's right. All right. Well, did you have anything else that you would like to say that you think would encourage something that's extremely passionate to you that you think would encourage someone in life? Never think God has gave up on you. You have gave up on God. He's waiting for you. Okay. Or whatever higher power you have, they're waiting for you. Right. Okay. All right. Well, thank you all for listening to this. Thank you all for listening to this podcast and hopefully it'll help you out with whatever you're going through. See you soon.
I hope you enjoyed and were inspired by this segment of My Peace. These new personal pieces will be posted to YouTube after every 5 or 10 episodes of Inspirational Devotions, so stay tuned and don’t miss the next episode of My Peace coming up soon. Have a blessed day!
