Episode 3 - Before Dating (Part 2) - Blooming Where You’re Planted

As we navigate the sacred terrain of Holy Week and Good Friday, "Bloom Where You're Planted" stands as our latest conversation piece. We weave personal narratives into the rich fabric of Jesus' ultimate sacrifice, uncovering its deep ties to our growth in dating and relationships. Our hearts open up about the seasons of singleness, drawing strength from the well-springs of family, community, and self-love. Join us, and you'll find encouragement to stand firm in who you are, to build your tribe, and to cultivate the art of connection, all while being deeply rooted in your present life garden.

Our guest shines a light on the life-changing power of purpose and service within the church. From touching stories of musical ministry to the magnetic draw of like-minded, purpose-driven souls in the Christian dating sphere, we unravel the threads of divine design in our lives. Discover how serving with your unique gifts can not only enrich your faith community but also make you all the more attractive to someone looking for a partner with a heart for God. We share our experiences, revealing how a common spiritual mission can be the cornerstone of a strong relationship.

Lastly, we turn the page to the chapters of our lives marked by Purpose, Health, and Finances. Here, the narrative unfolds to tell of resilience against life's trials, the pursuit of health for robust confidence, and financial wisdom for independence and relationship harmony. Our candid discussions with Maya offer a fresh perspective on valuing deep connections over material possessions, and we wrap up with a prayerful reflection, hoping to shepherd our listeners towards a path of blessings, strength, and clarity on this Good Friday. Join us on this introspective and uplifting journey through faith, love, and the essence of true prosperity. Amen.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Hello, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to On Purpose Christian Podcast. We're on our third episode. Really excited to bring this to you today. We actually have Lydia with us as well and some really cool news we're actually going to Disney World this weekend. So we're really excited for Lydia to have her first ever experience at Disney World, even though she probably will not remember any of it, but it's going to be a lot of fun. Maya's with us today as well.

Speaker 2: 0:27

Yes, welcome back to the podcast. If you're new, welcome. We're so excited that you're listening. Right now it's Holy Week and today is Good Friday, so if you are commemorating or reflecting on what Jesus has done for us, I wish you a very blessed Good Friday. Blessed Easter. But yeah, we are going to be spending Easter at Disney World. We're excited, we're really excited about that. Never done that before, so looking forward to it.

Speaker 1: 0:58

Yeah, we have a really good episode planned for you guys today. As you guys know, the last episode, which was titled Planted, Not Buried, we went through a lot of topics that were really helpful, hopefully, to you guys out there that are in that dating scene looking for, you know, good advices on things to do, what not to do, and, just you know, from our perspective of just you know, being in that mindset. Today we're basically going through part two and the title of this podcast we're calling Blooming when You're Planted. So it's a really good part two episode with a lot of good topics that we feel like are really important if you're out there in the dating scene and really wanting to set yourself up for success, you know, following God's word and what he sees as most important things to do. We hope that you just take a lot from this podcast. So, yeah, honey, you're actually the one that came up with the topic, so maybe you want to just go a little bit into your thoughts on where you came up with it and your inspiration.

Speaker 2: 1:56

Absolutely so. It's funny because, as we're talking about this, you know it's Good Friday, and Good Friday is all about understanding how jesus basically went to the depths, of just the depths, in order to rescue us, and this is this day is all about him dying. You know it's like you don't get a resurrection without a death. You know what I mean, and so I love the fact that we've already talked about part one, which is understanding that you are planted, not buried. You know like Jesus actually was buried, like he actually died, and he was buried so that we can live life abundantly, and it's so important that we really grasp that concept and really grasp that message. And it's so important that we really grasp that concept and really grasp that message. So I like being able to think about that with respect to what we talked about before, which is the fact that you are planted. It's really the previous episode. If you haven't listened to that one, you're going to want to listen to that one before diving into this one. But it's all about really getting down to the root of some of the things that you may need to deal with before you consider being out in the dating scene and really just recognizing that you're not desperate and that God is doing a work inside of you. And so, um, just want to emphasize the importance of that message. Lydia tooted, just a little bit just now. Just want to emphasize the importance of that message before we go into blooming where you're planted. So blooming where you're planted is Lydia tooted just a little bit just now Just want to emphasize the importance of that message before we go into blooming where you're planted. So blooming where you're planted is understanding that.

Speaker 2: 3:31

Now, okay, I know that I'm not desperate. I know that I'm not suffering from loneliness. I'm simply in a season where God has set me apart and he's working on me. Now I want to start thriving. Essentially, that's what part two is all about. Part two is all about being able to just where God has set me apart and he's working on me. Now I want to start thriving. Essentially, that's what part two is all about. Part two is all about being able to just bloom and it's the kind of thing that, like, when you are ready to date, it's gonna kind of exude out of you. It's one of those things where you know you're just, you're just glowing a little bit, if that makes sense. You're thriving. God is doing everything in your life to where you're able to feel healthy and you're great as a single person, you're thriving in your singleness, as opposed to kind of like bleeding out or hemorrhaging. Does that make sense, babe?

Speaker 1: 4:25

Absolutely. So, yeah, let's get into our first point. So we have down. Number one is building healthy bonds with family, friends and community. So actually, when I was thinking of this, I remember that we actually had this on our profiles, both of us. So, you know, on Hinge, that's where Mai and I met, and I remember that that was one of the things that we started talking about is just like you know, what is your, what's your family life? Like you know, you know, is that something important to you? Is that something that you're looking for in the other person? And we really connected on that.

Speaker 1: 4:57

I feel like family is just so important. You know it really starts with parents. I feel like you know what are the relationships like that you have with your parents and if you have good relationships with your parents, it really says in the Bible that we're to honor our father and mother and I really believe that you know, if you're going to get in the dating scene, it's so important that you have a healthy bond with your family, with your mom, with your dad, with your family, with your friends, because you know God doesn't want us to be alone and obviously your goal is to find a partner, but it's also important to have other people around in your life that you connect with and that you can go to family, get togethers and have community and fellowship with them. So I just want to encourage you that having bonds with family and friends are just so important as you get into the dating scene. It's going to help you just live a balanced life. I think that's a good way to say it. What do you think, babe?

Speaker 2: 5:50

Yeah, of course I want to pause and recognize the fact that you know everyone does not necessarily have the same family makeup per se, so it may hurt a little bit to hear like the words. You know you've got to have a great relationship with your parents. If that's not, let's say that doesn't apply to you. But maybe there are some mother figures and father figures in your life who you can remain close to, who can pour into you, who can speak to the history, your personal history with God, and who can encourage you and lift you up. I find this to be very important because a lot of the times, if you don't know your worth, then people will try to set your worth for you. They'll try to tell you what you're worth and I think that your friends and your family whether that's your birth friends and family or the people that God has put in your life to be your friends and family I think that these are the people who are going to speak to your value and be able to lift you up, and also these are the people who are gonna be able to hold you accountable to the person that you know is God's best for you.

Speaker 2: 7:07

Sometimes we have blinders on when we step into the dating scene and our family and friends have really helpful perspective, to be able to say I thought you wanted so-and-so, or I thought you wanted such-and-such, thought you wanted such and such, and we'll remind you. We'll remind you of what you're worth and we'll remind you of what not to settle for. Essentially so, um. But also I think it's just really important to have bonds with your friends and family, to be able to cherish them. Like Michael said, you know, be be able to honor the people in your life that God has given you and be able to cherish their presence and let them cherish you as well.

Speaker 2: 7:48

It's so important to be able to just understand that you are not. Even though you may feel lonely at times, you're not alone. That is really really, really important. I can't overstate it that you don't want to be desperate going into the dating scene or in the dating scene because you feel like you're missing something or anything like that, because you're not. God created you as a whole person and you're wonderful the way that you are, and your family knows that. So, yeah, make sure you're spending time with them.

Speaker 1: 8:20

Absolutely. One thing I'll just add is, you know, for me it's really important to manage bitterness, you know, because there's always things that have been done to us in our past and I think it's really important to understand just what Jesus has done for us. Because, if we truly look at it from that perspective that Jesus died for our sins and we're going to heaven if we believe in him and we live a life for him, and we're going to heaven if we believe in him and we live a life for him, to where, if you really see it from that perspective, that eternal perspective, I think it will help, you know, in situations where you know you have people that have done things to you or you've been wronged in life. So I encourage you to. You know, we talked about bitterness in a previous podcast, but I think it's just so important that you don't have bitterness towards your family, your friends. You know people that maybe have done things to you in your life, you know.

Speaker 1: 9:07

And if you have that bitterness, you know, you know it's a totally normal thing for humans to have bitterness, but you know, to manage that and to really, you know, go down deep into the word of God and really see things from a different perspective, because I really believe in dating. That is one of the things that, personally, I was looking for when I was dating is you know, what does Maya say about her family? Like, is that important to her? Or does she have all these crazy things to say about her family? Or oh man, you know this or that? I just think it's so important that you know if you want a healthy Christian, you know relationship in your life. You know, I really believe the other Christian, the other person, is going to be looking at that in your life, like, how do you talk about other people? So I think that's so important. Let's go on to number two. I think this is a great topic Serving in the church. Honey, what do you have to say about serving in church?

Speaker 2: 9:53

number two yes, I would love to start off by saying that God has endowed you with talents, no matter who you are. Your time, your treasure, your talents those are the most valuable things that you can give to the Lord and to God's people. And sometimes people will get caught up and say things like I love God, but I don't like being in the church. People are too catty or too petty or things like that. But imagine if someone said oh hey, michael, you know I like you. I just I just don't like your wife. You know what I mean? It doesn't fly. So being able to see the beauty that is God's church and being able to take time out, be able to give our treasures and to be able to give our talents in the church is such a privilege, it's such an honor, and I want to encourage everyone who's listening to if you don't feel that where you are is the best place for you church-wise or let's say you're not going to church, you're doing bedside Baptist.

Speaker 2: 11:00

I know a lot of us got caught up in that during the pandemic. We just got really used to doing virtual church. It's so important to be connected to the body. This is actually one of the big things that happened. It's a big part of our story, I would say, michael, was we started dating.

Speaker 2: 11:15

We were both going to certain churches, but we walked into church on New Year's Day and the message was actually about being connected to the body, not just knowing what God has done for you, but being connected to the body and understanding that the body is missing something when you're not there. As it says in scripture, that you are a part of the body and the body needs the member that you are. So being a part of the church, serving in the church, whether that's in first impressions or sound booth or children's ministry or administrative volunteering with the administration throughout the week you know all. There's so many different things now that churches need Social media, all kinds of things. Definitely, where you want to be is serving somebody, serving somebody in the church, in a healthy church.

Speaker 1: 12:15

Amen. So, yeah, serving is so important, you know, it's one thing obviously you know, to start, you know, if you don't have a relationship with God, it really starts there Having that genuine, strong bond with Jesus. And I highly recommend checking out Rick Warren's sermons to where you can start just digesting the Word of God, to where you're seeing verses, you're seeing things that are going to inspire you to understand that you have a purpose and that you have the ability to help other people. You know, and one thing I want to say with serving is, you know, I want to say it's one of the most attractive things to another Christian. You know, and that's one thing I was looking for personally was I wanted to make sure that, okay, maya doesn't just believe in God, but she's also serving God right, because if she's serving God, I mean she's doing it for free, she's doing it out of the love she has for Jesus and she's using her gifts and talents to help other people right. And I really believe that if another Christian is doing that and then you're in the dating scene and you see that, I think that's a really good sign, you know.

Speaker 1: 13:18

So some of the things I was looking for in Maya was. You know, she was obviously going to church. She's a believer, she serves, she reads the Bible, she prays, she's in a small group. Those are all things that are really important. So, for me, I'm a violinist, as you guys know violengospelcom, um, you know, and I have a pretty strong story on you know the violin, you know and testimony, ultimately for me, when, when I'm really starting to get connected to a church, I always like to serve in the, in the music ministry, um always found that to be a really great way to serve God. I'm using, you know, my music talent, um, for the glory of him.

Speaker 1: 13:56

So, but yeah, there's so many things that you can do in church to serve other people, like Maya mentioned serving, being a greeter or being in the children's ministry. So I highly recommend that you guys get involved in a church and not just go on a weekly basis, but actually get involved in serving. That's a huge part of being a Christian and really also finding another Christian on that same page is extremely powerful. All right, let's go on to number three, which is purpose-driven. So definitely some good things to say about this. What do you?

Speaker 2: 14:28

got to say about it honey. Yeah, I would say that this is probably how we got together. Yeah, that's exactly what I was going to say. This is literally the reason that we got married is that I had it on my profile. You had never, ever, seen someone with that on their profile and it just like smacked you in the face.

Speaker 2: 14:50

So purpose is really important to us. Purpose is the name of this podcast. Name of this podcast, and it's basically our core message is being able to understand what God placed you on this earth to fulfill what assignment God had in mind when he created you, and being able to find and match yourself to the person where your purposes really complement one another and you're able to chase after God together. I would almost say that, yeah, I just find this to be the most important.

Speaker 2: 15:30

Tenet is being able to really, I think it takes a lot of time, I think it takes several, I don't know it.

Speaker 2: 15:38

Maybe for some people takes several years, but for some people it's instant. They're born knowing what God placed them on this earth to do, and it's really, really, really important for you to be able to just take some time, be with the Lord, try different things out and let him speak to you. If you pray a prayer of God, please speak to me. Please show me what is your assignment for me on this earth. He will definitely speak to you, he will reveal it to you, he will confirm it for you. He will confirm it through scripture, he will confirm it through other people, he will confirm it through opening doors and even shutting other doors, and he will tell you exactly what it is that you're meant to be doing. And when you meet the person that he's fashioned for you and you tell them what your purpose is, there's just going to be a click. There's going to be a click and you will be able to know yes, we can both run and chase after God together.

Speaker 1: 16:43

Yeah, I want to start with something funny. So the very first thing that I actually like our second or third message to each other first message, remember, honey, was I said amen with exclamation mark, so that was like our first interaction after I saw one of her pictures. But then you know, and obviously everybody's different in what you do to stand out, but I really believe in dating, like if you can stand out, that really does set you apart. So what I did, you know, to attract Maya. I was genuinely excited. So I sent Maya like a five minute video talking about purpose, because you know, I've been so engulfed in Rick Warren, which you know for those of you guys that don't know, rick Warren wrote the Purpose Driven Life.

Speaker 1: 17:23

I'm telling you, if you read this whole book, your mind is going to change, you're going to see things differently. The biggest thing that I want to point out with purpose is that your most powerful testimony can be based on your weaknesses, on the things that you've done that were failures in life For me. I had a really bad divorce. I went through a really tough time where, you know I was on my knees, you know, trying to find God, and you know I was lonely, I was lost, but I really believe that that experience is now allowing me to connect with other people and help them through, potentially, their struggles, like what they're going through, and even with this podcast, just talking about different things. So purpose is really deep, but if you can find somebody that shares any bit of a similar purpose as you do, I really believe that's going to create tremendous impact in your life. Okay, because for me, okay and I've heard Rick Warren say this a lot, because Rick Warren and his wife, kay you know he he talks all the time about how different they are Like Rick is one personality, one opposite side of the spectrum, and Kay is like the complete opposite. They're. They're a great testimony in that you don't have to have things in common or even be similar personalities to have a great marriage, but they bond and they connect on purpose. They both have a singular, very strong purpose in life.

Speaker 1: 18:50

So the biggest thing that I think you should really understand is that if you know your purpose, then try to find if, in another person, any of that purpose overlaps, because that's going to create impact. Now, if one person's going the completely different direction, like they don't value what your purpose is, even if you're both Christians, even if you align in a lot of the other things that we talk about in our book which, by the way, you can get violentgospelcom. We have a great ebook that kind of goes through these six pillars. But basically, if, even if you align on all the things like you don't have anger, you're not self-centered but if you don't align on purpose, the purpose of marriage should really be to further your, your purpose in life, you know, for serving God. So I think that's a huge one. It's not easy to find, but I really believe if you pray for it and you're seeking God, he's going to give you that person in your life that's going to help you achieve more of your purpose. So let's move on.

Speaker 1: 19:51

I think that was a good topic. Next one honey. Let's talk about physical health.

Speaker 2: 19:57

Yeah, this is one of those topics. I would say that we're now we're kind of pushing away from. Things that I think about when I think about physical health are, yes, exercise, yes, hygiene, but almost the top thing for me is actually medical attention. Being able to just prioritize your health is very, very important, is very, very important. Being able to know essentially what is going on with your body, what conditions you have or what have you, and being able to address any conditions that you may have. So being able to have a lifestyle of eating healthy, being able to incorporate movement into your day-to-day life or weekly life, and then being able to really just have a good pulse, I guess, for lack of better words, no pun intended, but have a good pulse on where is your health and being able to get whatever medical attention you need in order to be your very best self.

Speaker 1: 21:23

Yeah, that's really good, I would say. Having some sort of routine with exercise, I think is really good. So in my case, I'm a huge tennis fan, so I love playing tennis. I play tennis quite a bit and it really helps, you know, I would say my confidence. You know that I'm, you know, and it really helps, you know, I would say my confidence, you know that I'm, you know it's a way to stay balanced, it's a way to stay in shape, because I would say that, you know, if you're looking for somebody, I think it's a good value, it's a good quality to be in shape.

Speaker 1: 21:50

You know that you care about your health, you care about your, you know your fitness and also, just, you know I really believe it's also biblical You're taking care of your body. God wants us to take care of our bodies. So if you're just eating a bunch of junk food all day and watching TV all day, that's going to hurt your confidence. You're not going to really feel good when you're on a date, taking care of your health. You know, finding an activity of some sort. It doesn't have to be tennis, it could be pickleball, it could be anything where you're just staying active. It could be, in your case, honey. You like CrossFit. You want to talk about CrossFit quickly.

Speaker 2: 22:30

I really do love CrossFit CrossFit, if you're listening yeah, no, I really do love CrossFit. I love dancing and I love what you've said about competence. That is so true. And you know, being able to incorporate movement into your life also allows you. It just regulates so much of your body and it kind of goes back to what we were talking about in the last podcast, which is being able to address your emotional health when you're physically moving.

Speaker 2: 22:58

I keep thinking of Legally Blonde when she's like endorphins, so you. But it really does. It produces great hormones. It produces endorphins and it helps you regulate all the other hormones so that some of those, you're able to kind of chase some of those thoughts away. It really allows you to be able to chase away some of the bad thoughts that may keep you down and may keep you thinking like, oh, this is why I'm still single, or things like that, things that aren't really helping you whether you're going to remain single or not. So being able to incorporate movement, I just feel like it touches other parts of your emotional health that will be able to be really beneficial for you as a person.

Speaker 1: 23:39

One thing I'll quickly mention that you know, and this is my preference, but you know one thing that we'll find in this world is that, you know, going to the gym, you know it's a good thing working out. But what I find personally that affects me, that you know I like to manage in my life, you know, before I met Maya is you know there's going to be women that are dressing appropriately at the gym and stuff like that, and I really find that okay, especially if you struggle with sexual sin. Um, it can be a place where it can kind of go bring you down a bad road. So that's where I re. I love tennis because I'm playing with a bunch of old men. You know it's like. You know it's it's like it's just, it's my preference because I'm not being tempted as often. You know, even just looking at a woman a certain way, like you know that can hurt your spiritual connection with God. So I, just for me, personally, I found a lot of comfort in managing that part of my life and sort of having more of a private place to work out. So I'll just mention that for any guys out there that maybe struggle, you know, with sexual sin. A lot of this we cover also in our book, you know, on our website. So we highly recommend that.

Speaker 1: 24:46

Let's go on to the next point. Honey, personal finances. Do you want to touch on that?

Speaker 2: 24:52

Yeah, so I don't know how many of you here are fans of Dave Ramsey. Another plug I mean Michael and I, you know, we really just want to be a resource to you and I will say that we are benefiting from the voices of so many people who have just gone before us and given so much wisdom. So I know how important it is to have a budget, to be able to live within your means, to be able to have financial goals, and since we know that finances play such a huge, huge role in having a prosperous marriage, it can only help you to be able to get your finances in order before you meet someone who you will potentially join your finances to. So that's all I'll say on that. I think, michael, you're kind of more of the expert when it comes to this, but if you're on your own, I can't recommend Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University enough.

Speaker 2: 25:54

I know a lot of people have different opinions about following Dave or versus doing Dave-ish, but it helped me. I feel like it helped me so much to be able to get out of as much debt as I possibly could before meeting Michael, and I think that it's a great framework for you know, even if you're not going to follow every single rule to the T. I highly recommend going through the class because it can only benefit you. So definitely you're going to want to. As the Bible says, the borrower is slave to the lender, so you're definitely going to want to get out of as much debt as possible and learn how to manage your budget before you start joining yourself to another person.

Speaker 1: 26:34

Borrower is slave to the lender. I thought Dave Ramsey said that, because I hear that all the time. It's in the Bible.

Speaker 2: 26:41

It's actually in there.

Speaker 1: 27:01

So I want to go into a little bit of my testimony with this. So my first marriage I ran a basically a violin business and selling violins online, violin instruction, and you know I really was prioritizing, you know, making money. As you know, I was a Christian but I was like everything was about making money. So what I want to just advise to you guys out there is that you know that's I would say, that's a ladder that if you climb it's really you're going up the wrong ladder. You know, if you're trying to just build wealth, build wealth, and you kind of have that as a mindset of what's the most important thing to dating and finding the right person, what I will say is that there's a lot of people out there that highly prioritize financial health, almost to a point of not seeing it the way God sees it. I really believe it's important to manage debt and to have good financial fitness. But there's also another mindset where you're just living to make money and you're not prioritizing generosity. Right, generosity is a very important, you know, thing that's talked about all over the Bible. So you know it's important to make a living, to have, you know, a good job, to manage debt. You know, to. It's almost ideal. You know to go into it did the dating scene, you know having managed your finances and your debt. But I want I want you guys to know that it's also something you really need to look out for when you're dating somebody, because they could easily just be wanting somebody that makes a lot of money and that's like one of their top priorities.

Speaker 1: 28:23

I would say with Maya, like you know, one of the green flags with Maya was like she didn't really emphasize or ask me questions about my job or like how much I made or you know, like obviously, eventually, now that we're married, we have these discussions and we have to figure things out because we're joining finances Culture. If somebody on the first date or two is asking you leading questions, wanting to know how successful you are financially, I would highly consider that to be a red flag time, having that strong, you know, purpose-driven marriage, if that's you know, one of the things, because it really says clearly in the Bible that you can't serve God and money. It says that very clearly. So it's very important just to manage that. But I highly encourage also what Maya said about financial fitness and Dave Ramsey. Those are all good things. I just want to kind of also point out some other things too. So awesome, we're getting close to the end here. We have the last one we put together, which is fun hobbies, travel, et cetera. So I'll let Maya touch on that.

Speaker 2: 29:40

Man. I'm like what do I want to say about this? I have a lot to say, but ironically, again, this is really blooming where you are planted. This is one of those things we threw in here. It's not a deal breaker at all. However, I really feel like it's so important for people to understand this concept of enjoying the season that you are in to the max. The season that you are in to the max.

Speaker 2: 30:12

So when I was single, especially when I was in college and when I was, I guess, in my early twenties I'm 31 now people would say those three words that would just grind my gears. It bothered me so much. Every time people would say this and they would say enjoy your singleness. And I would just be like, oh my gosh, you have no idea what it's like. You got married when you were 19. That's what I assumed about people. I just assumed that everyone who was married got married young and why. It bothered me. I just felt like it was a platitude that people would say to kind of just silence single people Enjoy your singleness. And now here I am, married and I have a baby, and the thing that I want to say to single people is enjoy your singleness. Ironically enough, I can't stress how important it is to be able to make memories of your own without the commitments and the responsibilities that come with having a husband and having a child. That season is going to be very sweet when it comes for you, but being able to really enjoy the time that you have and do the things that God wants you to enjoy and being able that God wants you to enjoy and being able to live abundantly is important. So this last one is about fun. It's all about fun. It's about having your personal hobbies and it's about being able to enjoy and really just really enjoy God's blessings. So I would say, if you are a lady like, get together with your girls as often as possible, cherish them, have fun, do fun things. Go on that road trip If you can afford it, if it's within your means, if it's in your budget, go and travel, go and see the sites that you want to see.

Speaker 2: 32:02

There can kind of sometimes be this conundrum where it's like, oh, I really want to do this when I get with my boyfriend or with my spouse because I want to be able to have somebody to remember the memories with and I think that's fine. But, as you can see once you have a spouse and once you have a child. You know, things do change and that's not to say that things change for better or for worse but I think that it's so important for you to be able to do the things that thrill you. You know, if you have a little wishlist that you know of things, that you're like man. I want to see this world that God created. I want to see Hawaii. I want to see the Caribbean. I want to visit Rome or Greece. I want to walk where Jesus walked. I want to go to Israel.

Speaker 2: 32:48

I can't emphasize enough how important it is to be able to do those things, and the fact of the matter is that when you do sit across from your husband-to-be or your wife-to-be, you're going to have stories to be able to tell them. You're going to have experiences to be able to share with them, and it may also be able to help you understand some things that you want to continue doing throughout your marriage. So if you end up being with somebody and you say you know I'm really into traveling, maybe that's something that you learned that is actually really important to you. You want to continue that with whoever God blesses you with. Let's say, you're really all about missions and you want to end up with somebody who's also into missions, like you are. It's important to be able to know that about yourself, so that you know when you get married there are some things that don't necessarily have to cease, you know. It's really, really important to know who you are, to know what thrills you, what excites you, so that you can do that with your spouse.

Speaker 2: 33:47

Because, in addition to be able to have your purpose with your spouse, god really does bring you two together for the purpose of love and being able to love one another, enjoying each other's company, doing the things on this earth that God allows us to do.

Speaker 2: 34:05

It's a blessing. So you want to be able to have fun with the person that you are going to eventually be with, and so it's a blessing. So you want to be able to have fun with the person that you are going to eventually be with, and so it's important for you to know what's fun for you. So, yeah, again, this is not a deal breaker, but I just think it's really important. I think it's something that you know. I just think it's something that you should really focus on and, yeah, be able to have fun, be able to live this life that God has given us and see all the blessings that he has laid out for you without ever having, without having a spouse. You know there's, there's so much for the taking, I feel, like in your, in your singleness. So yeah, here I am being a hypocrite and saying go out there and enjoy your singleness.

Speaker 1: 34:53

Amen, yeah, so I want to. As you were talking, honey, I was thinking of just a few things. Um, first of all, I definitely agree. I think you know these things really help you know, just your confidence, and help you stay balanced in life. You know, one thing I encourage you guys to do is get involved with any sort of church groups.

Speaker 1: 35:12

You know, that's one thing I did quite a bit before I met Maya is, you know, we had, you know, we had guys that were all believers. We would, you know, watch Rick Warren together. I had three or four guys that we all did that together with. And then we would do fun things afterwards, like we would play cards. We would, you know, I just hang out like we would just get to know each other, you know. So I remember we would do different activities, like we go, um, you know, downtown and just go to art, uh, art prize. I remember we did that one time. That was fun. So, yeah, uh, you know this really helps you just stay balanced in life, like bond with other Christians, build good friendships, have good fellowship. You know these are all good things, things that I was thinking of as you were talking. So, but, yeah, I totally agree that it also isn't a deal breaker.

Speaker 1: 35:58

I think you know, you know the core principles that we talk about in the book, you know are the most important things you want to be looking for in a partner. So you know, let's say all those things are solid, but maybe you don't have that many things in common as far as activities. I really believe that you shouldn't. You shouldn't be thinking that person isn't good for you just because you don't have a ton of activities to you know in common. I think some people go into dating thinking we have to have all these things in common and I, you know, I think I think they're more bonuses. I think that it's not like, if you do have all these things in common, you should be like oh, that's not important, it is, it's nice, it's nice to have things in common. But you know there's so many other things that are just core principles, importance that we've talked about quite a bit in these, uh, in these podcasts. So, but definitely have fun, enjoy your singleness I agree with that and just build a balanced life. I think that's important.

Speaker 1: 36:49

I hope you guys have enjoyed this podcast. We highly encourage you guys to. You know, check out Rick Warren's sermons. Go on YouTube, be like you know if you want to go through my similar story. You know he's got just some amazing sermons. You know, rick Warren, self-destruction, rick Warren, managing the mind these are all sermons that I would listen to over and over again. That just really started to transform me and you know he puts a lot of verses on the screen to where you're constantly just getting that word of God in your life. So I highly recommend that. You know our website allows you also to connect with quite a few other people that are maybe in the same boat as you. Maya is actually running a Facebook group that she highly recommends that you join. I'm running a male group for singles. We also have a couples group. If you visit our website, you could see the groups area and then also a marriage group, so you're able to join one of those. No-transcript Awesome.

Speaker 2: 38:17

Well, I've finished off in prayer the last couple of podcasts. Honey, do you want to finish us off in prayer? Father, I just want to thank you so much for this day, this Good Friday. I thank you that you're the reason that we're able to call it good. I thank you so much for the sacrifice that you made, that you've taken lashes and nails for us and that you've sacrificed yourself for us. I want to thank you for being the reason that we live and breathe, being the reason that we live and breathe, and I want to thank you that, because of your sacrifice, we're able to live and we're able to live life abundantly and we're able to live life forever. I praise you, lord, and I thank you and I thank you for this weekend.

Speaker 2: 39:00

I pray that anyone who is listening to this podcast will be blessed. I pray that you'll be able to be there with them, lord, on their journey towards healing or towards dating or towards the wedding aisle. I pray, god, that you'll be with them and that you will just continue to speak to them. I pray that they can hear you clearly, hear your voice clearly, through this podcast, and I pray that you'll be that with them in their unique day-to-day challenges and that they'll know that you always have the victory and you are the one who allows them to be able to have victory within their life, and so I thank you so much, father. We praise you, we pray that you bless everyone listening to this podcast, and we thank you In Jesus name. I pray Amen.