Episode 2 – One Simple Way to Stop Midlife Anxiety in Its Tracks
Summary: How to free yourself from the midlife anxiety that’s keeping you stuck.
Today’s episode is about one simple change you can make to free yourself from the midlife anxiety that keeps you stuck so you can start moving in the direction of a second-half life you’ll love.
You thought you’d enjoy having the time to take a deep breath, slow down and examine what’s next for you. But all this wide-open space sometimes feels more threatening than inviting.
Your heart pounds every time someone asks, “What will you do now?”
It’s a big question: What will fill your heart with joy and purpose in the second half of life? The pressure to figure out the future might be keeping you up at night. Or maybe it’s keeping you hunkered down with no energy or desire to begin exploring your options.
With one simple change, you can stop midlife anxiety in its tracks and step into the joy-filled second half you were created for.
Find the full transcript for this episode and other resources for navigating midlife at BloomingintheMiddle.com/2.
What Causes Midlife Anxiety?
People a lot smarter than me have studied what causes anxiety. But in my experience, you can count on it bubbling up when you feel like you should know something that you don’t.
I hate feeling unprepared, don’t you? When faced with a future that I’m not sure of, I worry, I feel anxious, and I try to equip myself with everything I might need to know to tackle a problem I can’t even define yet.
Midlife anxiety comes from feeling like you should have the future figured out. You think you should know what comes next, that by this time of life, you should know yourself better than you do.
But here’s the thing: You’re being transformed into something new all the time, and midlife is a season of dramatic transformation.
How to Reduce Midlife Anxiety Starting Today.
If you’re struggling with midlife anxiety, here’s the first step to finding relief.
Give yourself permission to not know yet.
If you’re like me, the thought of not having a plan doesn’t sound very enticing. But think of it like visiting a new city. You don’t expect to know exactly where you are, but you’re excited to get out and take a look around.
You bring along a guidebook and a street map, arm yourself with a camera to record what you find so you can share it later with friends, and you set off for an adventure.
You don’t know what you’ll discover, and that’s half the fun. You’re open to experiencing something new. You’re wandering, but you’re not lost.
The first time I visited New York City, I popped up out of the subway feeling so confident that I knew exactly which way to go. After walking for close to an hour, I found myself in the middle of Bryant Park, where I decided to sit and consult my phone.
Sure enough, I wasn’t even close to where I intended to be. But the view was beautiful. The park was humming with music, and people and children playing. It was a gorgeous spring day. I wasn’t where I thought I’d be, but I wasn’t lost.
I would have missed this lovely moment if I hadn’t given myself permission to explore and wander.
Have you ever found yourself in a place you didn’t expect to be?
Maybe you’re out walking and decide to take a different route than usual, winding up in a beautiful park or neighborhood that you didn’t even know existed. Your heart feels a little bit lighter as you breathe in the simple joy of making a new discovery. That’s what this season of midlife can be.
There’s Much to Learn in the Middle of the Journey.
Slow down. Enjoy the gift of time this season brings to discover the different layers of your new life. Decide right now to take away the layer of “should” and watch your anxiety fall away, too.
As you explore this new terrain, you’ll begin to find your way and figure out how and where you fit in. You might be surprised to discover some options you would have missed if you had rushed.
It’s safe to slow down and linger for a while. Because God promises to be with you at every turn.
So, you can relax and let go of trying to rush through midlife to find answers about your future and learn to live here in the middle by faith.
Faith that this new season and the future belong to God.
That He has not forgotten you.
That in Him your joy will once again be abundant and full.
And then? Look up with trusting eyes and watch where He will take you.
Choose Where to Focus Your Midlife Energy
Looking back too long only adds to your anxiety. And you can’t move forward if you keep looking back. Seems pretty obvious, right? But some things make it hard to stop trying to catch a glimpse of days gone by in the rearview mirror.
Maybe like me, it’s having kids who have grown and launched into the world. Yes, praise the Lord! But wow, do we miss them! Or you’ve had good friends who moved away. Or friends who stayed behind when you were the one who moved on.
And can we take a collective moment to say how much we all miss having a younger body that could once work all day, stay up too late, and still look and feel fresh and energized the next morning?
There’s no denying that midlife brings changes. And those changes can be bittersweet.
But remember that no matter how happy and content you were in the old place, you can trust God to lead you into what’s next. Because while the seasons of life change, God’s perfect love and plan for you never will.
So, instead of holding on anxiously to the past because you’re unsure of the future, decide right now to embrace not knowing yet so you can freely explore and discover who you are becoming.
Jesus said He came so we would have rich and satisfying lives—not just one or two rich and satisfying seasons, but whole lives filled with His peace and presence.
Trust in that promise and let the anxiety disappear as you slow down and explore this new territory. Give yourself permission to wander, to take a new turn or two, and the joy will follow.
God isn’t finished with you yet. It’s your time to shine.