Ep 168. Birth Story: Planned Homebirth after Unplanned Unassisted Birth

In this birth story episode, Kelly and Tiffany recount the incredible birth of a planned homebirth following an unplanned unassisted birth. They discuss their own personal experiences in this birth, the profound moments shared with the family, and the unique dynamics of the birth process. You are sure to love this sweet birth story!

00:00 Introduction and Summer Reflections

02:43 Listener Review

04:41 We Heart Nutrition Highlight

12:54 The Birth Story Begins

13:25 The Birth Moment and Father's Role

18:01 Post-Birth Reflections

42:25 Final Thoughts and Announcements

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Transcript

0:00

Welcome to At Home with Kelly and Tiffany, where naturally minded women gather together as we pursue simplicity and confidence in health alternatives, so we can show up better in our busy lives and feel more at home in our bodies. Join your favorite home birth midwife duo for conversation, candor, and community. Welcome back to At Home with Kelly and Tiffany. I'm Tiffany. I'm Kelly. And man, oh man, we are recording this in the middle of summer. Mm hmm. It's hot. It's hot, but my brain is just on summertime. It's been a joy to allow my brain to be in the summertime. It's such a sweet season for us in particular because we're not on call this summer. We had our last birth at the beginning of June and I was, I was just thinking like, well last summer felt kind of light too because we were you know, we had such a Such a low volume of clients, but weren't we on call last summer? I think we were actually now that I'm thinking about it because I remember talking about Trying to plan something getting away and we had to wait for a certain amount of time or something I can't remember exactly but the summer before that the summer before that the summer before that We always had a huge group of births in like July or August or something. And so we haven't been off, we haven't been like really off, off call in summertime in a while. And so it's, it's so nice to not be attached to my phone, to plan little trips and know that they're not going to get interrupted, to just go to the beach that doesn't have cell service and just enjoy sitting there. That's one of my favorite things. And I'll be like, well, I can just leave my phone in my car or at home wherever. It's wonderful. Oh, it's so good. Yeah, it feels, it feels really good. And I actually am truly enjoying summer. And this is the first summer in I don't know how many years that we are actually, like, planning a few things as a family to get out of town. Even just for like a couple days. I'm really excited. It feels like a new version of myself. I'm like, look at me! planning things. Yeah, I told my husband the other day, like, we need to have two trips loaded at all times. And we're about to go on vacation next week. So I'm like, Oh no, we only have one. We only have one trip. No, I need to plan one more in the next week. Just to have it loaded. Hurry up. Okay. I am so excited to share this particular birth story. It is it, this, this birth was a big deal and we will get into why that was. But first I want to share a review and this review is so sweet. It just, you know, we just go in chronological order. to try to keep track of who's left reviews and when we share them and stuff. And this one came up for this episode, which is so cool. She's talking all about how much she loves the birth story thing that we've been doing. I'm so thankful to hear that too because it's one of my favorite things that we've done on this podcast. I'm really glad that we're doing it. It's like, it's cathartic for me in some way too. It's sweet. Okay, so this is what Sharpie Kundi says. Sharpie Kundi? Sharpie. Shar pie coon die. Okay, I like it. She knows who she is out there. She 100 percent knows who she is. You tell us that you heard us read your review, and we'll buy you a drink. Five star review, titled, Love the Birth Stories. I've been listening, oh, I have been loving listening to Callie and Tiffany's birth stories from a midwife's perspective. Birth stories have been so educational and inspiring to listen to during this pregnancy, and I love their unique viewpoint. It's a fun listen for those who like a cross between an educational and a girl talk listen. Thanks for what you do, ladies. I love it. I'm so glad it's landing. Yes, exactly. And it's just, it's cool to see our vision for it actually hitting people. the way that we anticipated, right? Because I do think it is cool to be able to share some of these experiences that we have had clinically. Oftentimes when we hear birth stories it's moms telling their own birth story, which is good and important, but there's this piece also that we get to do that's sharing pieces but also sprinkling in some midwifery care clinical aspects of it, which is cool. It's very cool. Okay, so you guys have heard us talk about We Heart Nutrition, and we absolutely love this supplement company. You get on their website, weheartnutrition. com, and it's like easy to see why they are our favorite supplement company to recommend. But I want to do a little highlight on omegas, and just different ways that we're using omegas in our own home, and the benefits of omega on skin health specifically. I think I've always understood how it plays a role in anti inflammation, but I don't think I fully understood how essential amino acids are a part of the building block of our skin's function, but also especially the barrier. So, your skin's barrier is what kind of essentially like protects your entire body. Your skin is your largest organ. And so, your skin barrier keeps infection out and keeps invaders and keeps allergens out and you know allows good things to come in so taking it internally is just helping with all of those pieces but we've also been using omega topically and you guys heard me share a few episodes ago about one of my kiddos just navigating like skincare options and different clean beauty things and You know, etc, etc. It's been a saga, right? And one of the things that we're doing to rehab the skin and to enforce that good barrier of the skin is Applying these omega capsules like directly on the skin and it's been a game changer That's been Actually soup so you just like prick it a little bit and get the oil out and does she Leave it on her skin. Does she like oil cleanse with it or okay. She just leaves it Yeah, so it's just a part of the skincare routine. We have like a little Like a little, I don't know, pin. That she also just like leaves in it to keep it plugged up. Okay, she doesn't use an entire capsule. No, maybe like a whole capsule will last her like a week or something. Oh, cool. Yeah, so she just takes a little bit out, puts it on after she washes her face. And it works really well on her lips where she's using it specifically because it's okay to have like this glossy thing on there already, right? That looks normal. But you can put it on any other place on your body, any other skin problem areas, and it's directly related to helping build that skin barrier back up and keep you from having, you know, sun damage or different, different weather things or different things that go on your skin, any problem areas, eczema, rashes even just like acne or anything that like kind of interrupts the integrity of the skin. It helps to build all that stuff back up. So there's a little hot tip for you. That is super fascinating. I'm going to share a one off thing that we've been taking this puppy that we adopted from. Tiffany's home to puppy training class and it's with this trainer who is Obviously obsessed with her animals like makes her dogs food from scratch kind of stuff Which more power to you that is not a hundred percent not me But anyway, she was like, oh and then you need to make sure that you're supplementing your dogs And she's talking literally as if, like, they were humans. She's like, the probiotics, oh, and the prebiotics, and like, this type of food, and you know, they're just like people and what they need, yadda yadda. She was like, you absolutely need to be supplementing with omegas for your dog because of their skin health and whatever. And I was like, this is just really funny to me that I'm sitting here listening to advice that I often give to humans be given to dogs. Anyway. Yeah. I would love to talk to that dog trainer. Do you still have sessions left with the dog trainer? I have one more session left. Okay. So you can show up to that and you can say, I was really digesting all the information you said about supplementation for dogs. And I was just wondering, what do you, how do you supplement yourself? That's a question I would really like the answer to, just given the information I have on the rest of her life. I mean, she probably takes better care of her dogs than herself. I would guarantee it. I love animals. I don't know, that's a strong statement. I tolerate animals and we keep collecting more and more of them. I see the value that they bring to family, life, companionship, etc. However, I get really irritated when people make animals more important than humans. In any way. Yeah, like elevating their experience over a human's experience in some way. Yes. Yes, 100%. Okay, just real quick, just to emphasize this, and so that people stop following us who love, love pets more than people. Can you share that thing that that guy said at the baby shower you were at last month? About how they're very prepared for parenting. So one of my husband's best friends from high school is having his first baby. So on the like older end of things, right, we have a teenager already and he's like just entering into parenthood. And so we're talking about like the shift that's going to happen in life and whatever. And he said non ironically that they've had this dog for the last few years that they have really loved, that they have incorporated into their family, that they take to swi they take them to swim lessons for this dog. They do all of these things. So they are fully prepared for parenting because they've been parenting for so many years in their view, this dog. And Trevor and I both looked at each other and it was like hard not to laugh, but also we were like, That's, that's interesting. This is going to be real different. And I know you don't understand that yet, but it's going to be so different. I'm sorry. Bless it. Yep. I also I also used to tell my doula clients all the time who really loved their, usually dog, right? Love, love, love this dog. And it's the most important thing to them. And maybe that's a part of why they want to labor at home as long as possible or to have a home because. then they don't have to leave their pet behind. So sweet. But I used to tell doula clients all the time, like, okay, so just prepare yourself for really degrading this animal to the lowest possible level in your home and family, because suddenly in perspective with your newborn. Your dog is, there's no possible way it can maintain the level of importance that it is in your life right now. And just, just, I'm planting that seed so it doesn't completely take you by surprise and you feel like the worst animal owner on the planet. Because now your dog sleeps outside and you Basically kick it to the side because it's in the way and you are so irritated that it requires any amount of care and affection for you. Not everybody feels that way. So, so I stopped telling my doula clients that because it really upset them and made them angry at me. And they're like, you don't understand my love for my pet. This is different. And I'm like, oh, this isn't helping you actually. This is mostly just making you hate me and you haven't even had your baby yet. So. Perfect. We'll not continue with that advice. But put that in your back pocket. Whoo, animals and babies. That is a radical combination. Radical. There we go. Omegas. So please visit WeHeartNutrition. com And check out all their supplements, but specifically the benefits of Omega. We cannot, we cannot emphasize enough. You guys know you can use coupon beautiful one to get 20 percent off your order. I mean, that's amazing in and of itself. Okay. Today we're sharing a birth story about a planned home birth. That happened after an unplanned, unassisted birth, and that basically means I think their first baby they had in the hospital, their second baby they meant to have in the hospital but it came so quickly they had it at home accidentally, and then their third baby they hired us and we got to attend the birth of their baby at home, and it was planned. And this happens quite often, actually, I mean. We've taken care of a handful of people who were like, I would never have home birth on my radar. No, thank you. But then when you just do it at home on accident, you're like, Oh, well, this would have been better if I had stuff planned or like somebody here with me, that kind of thing. Yeah. Instead of like calling 9 1 1 and having a bunch of firemen who probably didn't want to be in there walking in, you know, all that kind of stuff. Yep. So it was really fun to take care of this particular family and it was like really funny actually because this, we knew this family, they'd go to church with us and they, they hired us basically just based off of practicality. Yeah. Right? Yes. A hundred percent. And then during the prenatal care, You know, we were, it was in the beginning of our practice, of course we're going in chronological order on this. So this was like, I don't know, maybe like our fifth or sixth birth or something. Mm-Hmm. And we're just very enthusiastic about all the things that we're doing in our practice and everything's fun and brand new, and we're just bringing so much value into our prenatal time. And this particular mom was like. Okay, well, I'd really just like to keep our appointments to like 10 or 15 minutes. So if there's not anything else that I have to know about. I'll see you around. Yeah. Yeah, like she was just really ready to go. Not because she didn't want to. To spend time with us or not because she didn't she just truly did not need it She didn't she did not need the extra the extra all the things and I just kept waiting for her to come around the whole prenatal time to be like Oh, no, she's gonna see She's gonna see how the midwifery care is just adding so much more to the experience and I'll share this a bit more after we share the birth story itself. But one of my takeaways With this taking care of this family was You That they really didn't need us. Yeah, and like what a, what a gift that actually is. Like one of the sweet things that midwifery care is that we get to establish relationship and all of that, but that had also happened. outside of the, you know, the prenatal room, right? Like we had this relationship elsewhere. But it was really sweet to see for real that they were like, no, we're actually just kind of good. Like we're, I trust my body. I know what it's doing. I know the decisions I'm going to make. I know the options that are out there for me. And so, yeah, it was just, it was cool to witness. I will say though, I remember specifically. She had a sinus infection at some point in her pregnancy and we sent her a very thorough, like, holistic sinus infection protocol. And that, she was like, Oh, you guys helped me with something! And she was very thankful for that. And I remember being like, Okay, yes, this is meaningful. This has nothing to do with your pregnancy or having your baby. But it, it like, solidified, I think, in her mind. Like, Oh, yes. This is a very helpful experience. Yeah, she said, I think of this every single time I send this protocol to somebody else, right? She said, It worked immediately. I sent it to everyone in my family. Let's go. And I was like, yes, I was, I was like, we have, we have established value. Yeah, we've done it. We've established value for this client. So, you know, it just takes all kinds, right? I mean, is there a home birth type? I don't know. There's definitely, there's definitely like the majority of the people we take care of tend to fall into a specific category that are looking for a certain kind of experience and really want as much as everything that we can offer. This particular family was like, I'm good. I trust you. I trust my body to show up. Okay. And that's exactly what we did. We just showed up and I know that she had a love and affection for us. Because she shared that many times, but she also dubbed us with the nickname of wives. It's like, these are my wives. These are my wives. She took the mid right off and just went in with, these are my wives. I still see her every so often because our This daughter and my youngest are, you know, about a year or so apart. So there's like sort of in similar groupings and certain classes and things like that and She'll always be like, hey wife Like, oh, yeah, she just decided that's who we were to her. Very very sweet. Okay. There is a really heavy piece of taking care of this family and why it's, why it ended up being so impactful and important to us. And that was because about a year after this birth, the dad was diagnosed with a really aggressive form of stomach cancer and he only lived for maybe nine months after that. Yeah, this, I mean, it was, At the end of the year that this baby was born, he started having symptoms. And so, and by he was present for her first birthday party, but passed away soon after that. Yeah. So the mom, I remember her sharing just in her just in her, I don't know grief. Yeah. And processing. She's like, it was so interesting how he, you know, From almost to the day that he was diagnosed to the day that he passed away was nine months and her relating that to like a pregnancy of that experience of like preparing for and fighting with and all of those, all of those pieces. It was like, it was so interesting how she was drawing some of those parallels because she had just gone through a process like that. And What a tremendous amount of tragedy and heartbreak that that was for us because we love her and she's in our actual personal community but even just for our practice because you just get so attached to the families that you care for and there's a moment in this birth that I just will never ever forget where the dad He just shined in his fatherhood, actually multiple places, but I'll share, I'll share my favorite memory of how, how that was. And we get to, we got to be a part of that. We got to see him in one of his best roles ever as the dutiful and faithful husband and father. And like, that's so precious. that we have that gift of being able to remember him that way. That was the most experience that we had with him besides just being in community with him. And so special, so hard, and just also so beautiful in the same space. And we got to hold, we got to hold some of those pieces for this family. Yeah, and we got to witness him be this strong, connected, funny, like all of the things about him that were so vibrant. We got to really experience so many pieces of that, which is a huge gift. And we got to be a part of his baby's birth, which like, you know, she gets to carry that story forever of how her dad was there and, you know, showed up and all of those things as well. And such like a huge experience within the life of a family that they got to experience together one more time. Um, is really special. Yeah, it just mattered. It mattered so much. There was also, there was also like, on our own, in our own personal lives, there were really weird things going on. Not really weird, but just like why, you know, like when things happen in your life and you're like, why? And then it was happening to Kelly and I Simultaneously, we were going through really difficult separate things Um, and we got to this birth. We set up all of our things. We assessed vitals and everything We knew they wanted more privacy So we stepped out of their labor space and we It's in the middle of the night and we just sat there and looked at each other, processing what was happening in our personal lives also. And I'm sure we shared this at some point on the podcast somewhere, but like we didn't start out as best friends. We just started out as like, like compatible Partners that had like a lot of ideas and like hopes and dreams and like let's just go run with that together and see what happens. And like enjoyed each other. We're friends. Friendly. We're friendly. Yeah. Not nearly to the depth where life kind of has taken us. Yes, but I will say that this birth and what was going on in our lives at the time was the fulcrum of, you know, You are going to be my best friend for the rest of my life. Don't ever try to untangle from that because we are just in it. Like God was so strategic and sweet and generous with allowing these things to be happening simultaneously. I'll never forget just sitting and processing at that birth of like, yeah, wow. So there, yeah, wow. There's just a lot. A lot going on every everywhere and then being called back into the birth and like, yep, this is it. It's, there's some really good things, there's some hard things, there's some, some everything. So remembering this birth, I guess all this to say, remembering this birth is, feels so big because it brings us back to that time that was just, there's, there's so many pieces, their family, our family, our business. Our everything, our friendship, there's just so much packed into this, this time. I remember she, she, after she had her baby and her baby was finally like on her chest, I remember crying and just being like, Oh, I just needed, I needed that. I needed something beautiful. I needed something like redeeming. I needed to see it happen. I needed to do it with you. Like there were so many pieces, again, that was just this story as I saw it on the. Schedule of us recording. I was like, Oh, that's, that's going to be a, a beautiful, heavy one. Beautiful and heavy. Yeah, absolutely. Okay. And these clients had no idea at that time that our personal lives were an absolute disaster. Nope. No, we, we remained professional. I think none of our clients knew unless they were particularly. really close to us or something, but not, yeah, we played that one close to the chest with our clients in particular. Cause it's not about us, right? Yes. We need to show up and just serve. And sometimes that's really hard to do. And that includes like, Leaving your children behind and scrambling to just depart from what's happening in your home and, oh my gosh. Yeah. And we did it, and I don't even know how. I seriously don't. It was like so crazy. Okay, so, this baby so this birth is four and a half years ago. I know, so nuts. Her water broke at, in the evening, around 7 o'clock. And she started having contractions a couple of hours later. And then we charted that her active labor started around 10 p. m. By the time we arrived, so I imagine her active labor started, she's like, okay this is really happening and getting pretty intense. I should probably ask my midwives to come. And then we didn't arrive to her until a little bit after midnight. And I remember parking and walking into their house because they had just huge pots of mums. It was in the fall, and just huge pots of mums at their doorstep, but it was like, Everything was dark. It was the middle of the night, but it felt very fall. It was like very crisp and, Mm-Hmm. and so sweet. And I remember specifically at the home visit, him being very proud of the flowers outside. They were like his flowers. The dad's. That's right. We were making, we were making fun of him for being the gardener. Yeah. And the family. Yes. Oh, you're flowers. Oh, they're so nice. Oh, that's so cute. You're pretty little flowers, Yeah. We just bring compassion into every moment. Ev every moment. Okay. So when we arrive. She's already sort of, her breath is catching at the peak of the contraction. She's already starting to, a little bit. And so we're like, oh yeah, we got here at the right time for sure. She's moaning through these contractions already. She's working pretty hard. and she starts to bear down a little bit about 25 minutes after we arrive. So those little catches turn into more pressure that her body's responding to. And at 12 38 a. m is when we marked that she was actually pushing. And she's like, I think I have to poop. She gets up to go to the bathroom. She only pees, because there's no poopoo, it's just baby. And then she labored mostly in her bed, and then ended up back there after trying to poop. And that's where she just kind of stayed in her bed. They had a, they had a tub in their, in their bathroom, and she was uninterested. I remember her saying like, I don't, I don't care about being in the water. Nope. I don't think she ever planned to. Yeah. Which I think is like a helpful thing for people to hear too, like you don't have to be in the water just because you're having your baby at home. Yeah. I mean, and I think like the first couple of years of our practice, like only 20 percent of our clients had babies in the water. And I was like, Oh, we've got to tell people that because I think people think like automatically water birth, home birth go hand in hand. I'm having a home birth. It is better for me. It's better for baby if I have. My baby in the water. We have a, we have an episode about water birth somewhere. Yeah, where we talk about that. In the mix, where we talk all about that and your options and stuff for that. You guys can go back and look for that episode. So then she's pushing really, really hard. And she's working for about 20 minutes. So I think sometimes we also portray that like, Oh, third baby is just going to fall out. Or your second baby you just accidentally had at home. So it must've just. He must have sneezed and it just fell out. But third, third baby and she has had that type of pressure the whole time we're there for about an hour and half of that time she's working really, really hard every single contraction pushing, pushing, pushing. And so finally at just a couple minutes before 1 a. m. the head emerges and then 30 seconds later the rest of her Baby comes, but this is the part that I love the most. Yep, I, I still have not seen anything quite like it. Okay, tell the, tell the listeners. Okay, so baby, okay, so mom's working very, very hard, right? Pushes her baby out. We often see in videos or hear in stories, right? Like, mom reaches down, brings baby up to her. Somebody helps bring baby straight up to her. And you get that joyous moment of my relief and my joy and all of those things. What we don't often hear, though, is sometimes, sometimes you need a second, right, before you actually can say, like, okay, I can breathe out what just happened and I can breathe in what is ahead of me, right? And so we call that the birth pause, where baby comes out and we just sort of, like, wait until mom is ready to do whatever she instinctually wants to do with her So her husband catches her baby and we sit and assume that baby will be brought up to mom, but she's like, no, no, no, give me a second. And so she's so, so he's holding this baby in his hands in between her legs. Yes. Right down in between her legs while she is, you know, kind of just breathing and being like, wow. And looking around taking sips of water, putting her water, you know, bottle back down. chatting a little bit. She like, she doesn't barely even look at her baby yet. And we are all just anxiously awaiting for this next step of like union between the mom and the baby. And I'm certain we charted how long it was, but it, it felt like at, at least like a couple minutes. It was two minutes. Which might not sound like long, but that's long when you are watching a baby. After they're just born and dad's hands just hovering and I'm like, you must be, that's like a lot of time under tension. Your arms must be tired at this point. Right. It was, it was just really fascinating until she was ready and said like, okay, I can have my baby now. A solid two minutes of just not even necessarily the joyous. Oh my gosh, my baby's here. It wasn't that really at all. It was just like a, okay, that was. That was a lot more work than I anticipated and kind of like working that out in her body and mind. It's interesting. It was so good. It was so good for us to just be like, this is fine. I'm sure you'll grab your baby eventually. And she was like transitioning well and you know, breathing and pinking up and well flexed, all those things. So there's no concern about the baby. But at one point I wanted, I was almost like, do you want to put her down? Like, You're holding her for so long. You could just set her down for a minute and then we'll get back to this when she's ready. Yeah and so it's just good for us to to recognize some of those pieces and see that like It's, it's not this, we're not in a rush for that part. It's coming and it's okay for just for one phase to just fully have completion and rest before transitioning to the next thing. And I think sometimes we're just really rushing along in all things in life, but especially birth. We're just like, okay, here, now get your baby to cry. Now get your baby on the breast. Now get your blah, blah, blah. Okay. Okay. Move, move, move. And. It's not needed. There's a different pace there and we get to follow that lead when we're really good attendants. We get to follow the lead of the pace that's already being set. Yeah, and that, that really was a good reminder because I think, I think maybe there's like an assumption that moving along in things is like better, right? Like, okay, we're done with that part. Let's, Let's like, get on to the next thing, but when we like actually practice what we preach and slowing things down and trusting physiology and trusting, like, and respecting what parents want and the baby's transition and all of that, like, clearly it was exactly what she needed and she was able to control that and we didn't have to push anything on her that she wasn't it. And she was so connected and bonded with her baby when she was ready to do it. She was like, oohing and aahing and all of, you know, all of the things, so happy to have her baby. But she really did need a second to I don't know, kind of formulate in her brain, I'm done with that, and potentially that was harder than what she anticipated walking into. Yeah. Potentially. Yeah. And the first thing we charted that she said was, well, that really hurt. That's the first thing she said after her baby was born. When she was like, you know, in the room again. Makes sense. Yeah. So, I mean, it was relatively quick. She had her baby five hours after her water broke. And only three hours after contractions actually started, she got us there on time, it was pretty smooth. And that's a helpful thing too, I think, to pull apart as well. Her water broke at the beginning of her labor without any other, like, real signs necessarily, and contractions didn't start till a little while after. There was no concern on our part. We're like, your baby's moving, you have no concerns. we'll just see what happens. And I think we probably just told her like, hey, if we don't hear from you tonight, we'll just check in in the morning and see how things are going. That was the extent of, you know, our kind of guidance on that unless she was concerned about something. Right. And so that's not what always women envision or think or are told by care providers as well. Yeah. We didn't say like, well, you should probably come get some antibiotics and let's start doing some vaginal exams as a comparison of care models. Yeah. And then her placenta came out about 13 minutes after the birth. I just like to note that time because there's such a huge variety of timing. Placentas can come out five minutes after the birth, but usually not. Usually when we take a physiological perspective with third stage, it's 15 to 30 minutes is average, probably closer to 30 minutes. So the way that placentas come out in the hospital at 5 10 minutes is a different management. That's different management. Mm-Hmm. That's a forceful management. Yeah, for sure. Of placenta. But she did lose a considerable amount of blood. We charted 825 milliliters, which we would say like 500 begins like a significant volume of blood loss. And she lost a few more, a few more milliliters than that. And she also told us in her prenatal time. That she passes out every single postpartum, and she loses a lot of blood and she passes out. And I remember approaching that conversation with, like, Well, but you've been medically managed, and who knows, like, the trauma of of unexpectedly having your baby at home and however that was handled with, you know, firefighters or whatever your doctor did, blah, blah, blah, right? But that truly was just her thing. She lost a lot of blood quickly than would sort itself out and was her body was very efficient, you know, moving forward, didn't bleed a lot postpartum and all of that, but it definitely, she continued the trend and we were like, Oh, this is, This is what your body does. It's not, it's not just because of poorly managed care, which it can be of course, but that was a good learning experience for me to, to just take things at face value and be open and we weren't expecting it because she had shared it with us. We weren't stupid about it, but I also was thinking well let's just see, let's just see if we can smooth that out with our With our wonderful approach. Which oftentimes we can of course, but yeah, that's just what she did. She passed out when she got up to go to the bathroom. She told us she was feeling dizzy. It's like she got up and she was like, I know this is gonna happen. And her husband was like, yep, I'm ready for it. There was like no concern or fear for them whatsoever. It was just like, okay, well, she really needed to pee. She wanted to get up. and This is what happened and her husband got her. into the bed pretty quickly after that. Yeah, he picked her up from the bathroom floor and carried her to her bed, which is, that's a, that's a big ask for somebody who is basically like dead weight at that point, right? Yes. And like, I know the idea of women passing out is It's scary or concerning or whatever because it's dramatic, but it's physiologically not an actual concern. Like clinically, that doesn't, that doesn't alarm us. It just means that like she needs to lay down and get blood to her head, get more circulation to her, to her head. That's a mechanism of passing out, right? It's meant to get you horizontal so blood can flow back into your head. You know, women just, they come to and then you're more careful about how you move them around. Yeah. And she, and she felt pretty good pretty quickly afterwards too, which was surprising in some ways, but yeah, she was kind of like back to herself relatively quickly, which was great. After like a good meal and more cuddles. Yep. We charted that we told her to stay in bed for four hours. That was the magic number. Yep. Apparently. Well, you, you shouldn't get up for at least four more hours. In four hours and five minutes. You may go. Usually your body just needs to just kind of like equilibriate, start building some blood volume back up, utilize some good nutrition and hydration, recover from the intensity of the birth event itself. Maybe take a little nap. Yep. We often will give women instructions who are feeling really woozy or fainty or dizzy or whatever, give them instructions for peeing in a bedpan or, or at the side of their bed so they don't have to go all the way to their bathroom. But it's something we deal with just periodically. Yeah, for sure. And not as, not as dramatic as it may sound. So we love, love, love that birth pause that taught us a lot about not rushing birth and just gave us some like sweet perspective. We got to see that dad in just like an incredible amount of emotional and mental and physical strength, you know, like it was, like you said, Kelly, it was so cool to remember him so strong when later we saw him so weak in so many ways and what a beautiful experience it was for that family. Just to have that as a family. I don't know, like a cherry on top of their family growing and to enjoy that before what was to come. And I also remember, I just remembered this as we were talking about it. So, When a family at our church has a new baby, they ask for a picture, a picture of the baby, a picture of the mom and the baby, the whole family, whatever you get to submit it. And then it's announced, Hey, we have a new member in our congregation. And they put the picture up. And this mom was so proud of us being there with her together. And we've served a lot of families that go to our church, but this is the only family. that submitted the picture with us in it. And so that was just so fun. We were so proud. It was, it was really sweet. And it was the beginning of our practice in a lot of ways. So it felt like, Oh, we're like, we're, we're doing this. Look at us. Like, I don't know, for some reason it felt very official. Like, Oh, we're up there and we're look at, look at what we did together. We did a thing. Yeah. And then everyone, you know, came up to us later and was like, When did you become a doula? How long have you been a doula for? Even people that I feel like I've known for a while. I'm like, well, they're So since basically since you've known me, I've been a doula, became a midwife many years ago, student. What is that? What's the difference? I don't understand. So, I mean we still get that. All the time. To people I've explained it to before. Yep. I'm like, remember last time? You I told you. Yeah. Oh, so great. Okay, so, I mean, that was my, those were my big takeaways of like, what an impact this That was for that family and that they like, they really didn't need us. She did all the things. She did all the work. He supported her. We were just there to kind of like, I don't know, hold it together. It felt good for them to have the backup plan that they needed. But like her blood loss, her passing out, like she didn't need any clinical intervention. She just needed her husband to carry her back to bed. They didn't need us to hurry any of the pieces along. They didn't need us to say like, okay, everything that's going on is normal and fine. I mean, it was just, she needed that sinus infection protocol. She got it. But they, but, but like Bertha set up to work without a skilled attendant and that's what we get to see most of the time. And the confidence that this particular couple had. in the process and their choice just really shown. They just were, it was, it was a very independent thing for them. Yeah. This, this birth in particular just feels like a milestone in a lot of different ways, brings up a lot of different emotions for sure. And you know, what what is what a journey that they were taken on after this birth. But how sweet it was also to see them parallel some things of, you know, the process of surrendering and trusting this hard thing in labor, in surrendering and trusting this hard thing in the end of life as well. And, The, the joy that they had before them, the joy that they knew was coming on the other side of both of those experiences was really impactful as well. It was awesome. So you guys have heard us talk a lot in this episode about, I don't know, this more holistic approach, this more natural approach, this more like let's, let's go along with what the body is already doing. And all of those themes are central. on the midwifery model of care and just loving and respecting and honoring physiological birth and how our bodies were just set up to work well on their own and those topics those themes are a part of every single video in our childbirth education course and we are so close so so so actually maybe by the time this Nope, it's not quite time yet, but soon after, soon after this podcast comes out, we will be done creating the content of our childbirth education course, and that means that we're going to be able to finally start the timeline on opening it up for evergreen status. And so if you are interested in getting more information about that, seeing more. about what's inside of this course, recommending it to a friend or whatever, you can find that link in our show notes, or you can just go to beautifulonemidwifery. com and you can find all the information about the childbirth education course, about the waitlist. Being on the waitlist is a benefit to you. There are many perks to being on the waitlist. We can't say what all of them are because We don't know every single perk, but there's, but you will benefit from being on it monetarily, informatively, informationally, and informatively. And you just, you just will get more out of waiting for this course if you're on the wait list. So put yourself on the wait list just to get more information, just to get the perks of being on there. And. Keep your ears up in the next few weeks for us actually launching this thing because we're getting down to it. Yeah, we're getting very close and the feedback that we're getting from our live kind of launch group that we did this with has been overwhelmingly positive and we've been able to implement more information and all kinds of stuff over the course of the last few weeks. So we're very, very excited to get this into your hands. So that is coming. super soon. And we will catch you next week.