Connecting with Your Authentic Self: Insights from my Transformative Retreat

Have you ever wondered what it truly takes to connect with your authentic self? Join me, Kirsty Harris, as I recount the transformative experience of our recent retreat at the Sensate Spa and Studio in Bristol. I was joined by my friend Jax to create an inviting and open atmosphere where women could explore their core values and embrace body acceptance. From the powerful moments in the opening circle to the creative yoni connection workshop where participants molded their yonis out of clay, this episode is filled with raw emotions, laughter, and profound connections. Delight in the beauty of conversations that grew from these activities and the deep sense of sisterhood that blossomed throughout the day.

This episode also celebrates the magic of guided meditations, supportive spa sessions, and a heartfelt cacao ceremony that allowed everyone to reflect and bond. Despite some logistical hurdles, the retreat was a resounding success, fostering healing and deeper understanding among the participants. And the excitement doesn't stop there—I’m thrilled to announce our upcoming spring retreat, focusing on self-love and radical self-acceptance. Tune in to get a glimpse of the incredible journey we embarked on and find out how you can be part of our next transformative experience. Make sure to listen and get inspired to embark on your path toward self-acceptance and authentic living.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hello and welcome to the Find your Inner Glow podcast hosted by me, kirsty Harris. I am a holistic coach and I am super passionate about helping others improve their lives by focusing on the mind, body and soul. Each week, I will be sharing my insights, experiences and advice on how to tap into your inner glow and live a more fulfilling and balanced life. So join us and let's discover how to find your inner glow together. Well, hello everyone. I hope that you're all really really well. I'm just popping on to talk about the retreat. So, for all of you that don't know, I held a retreat yesterday. I'm literally going to talk about it whilst it's fresh in my mind. But also, I really feel like I need this time to process because so much happened and so many like really good things happened throughout the day, and I just wanted to capture this experience because I want to like be able to reflect on this podcast and remember, like all the amazing things that happened. So I got there, and I got there with my friend Jax, and Jax helped me set up everything. So thank you so much, jax. Um, but yeah, the way that the day went was just incredible. So the energy in the place, which was the Sensate Spa and Studio in Bristol. It's like this little gem that's completely tucked away on a housing estate. So on a housing estate, basically, it was like so you have like this little rank of shops and there's like this little doorway and in the doorway you just go into like a different world. So previously it was like a junk yard and then the owner, sarah, like took everything and she remodeled it into this outdoor spa but like beautiful studio as well. It's just so beautiful. Like as soon as you go in it just feels so gorgeous. The plants are there, there's fresh rosemary, there's like beautiful flowers, there's a beautiful tree in the middle. Like it just gives so much, really, just really nice energy, to be honest. And yeah, so I arrived, I set up, so we all had like yoga mats in a circle. I created like a circle centerpiece and then we also had tables for a creative session. That was later on.

Speaker 1: 2:21

So when people came, came, it was just so welcoming, like all the girls who knew each other, like knew each other, but then also welcomed the girls that they didn't know, which I was like that's so amazing. Like that's so amazing because people just felt like instantly accepted and loved and just like able to just be in that group, which was which was lush, absolutely lush. So yeah, I don't know, I guess like your vibe attracts your tribe. So I'm just forever grateful for those who just accept other people into the group. Like you know, everybody seems to get on really well. I never really have any problems in like group settings when I attract women.

Speaker 1: 3:01

So the opening circle was great. We talked about the rules for the day, the intention for the day, but also about how, like throughout the day, we would be poking the softer bits of us and we may kind of experience a bit of trauma, like being brought up or being brought back together. So there was definitely a lot of tears and a lot of laughs throughout the retreat I'm not going to lie. And in the opening circle I got everybody to like get together in pairs and introduce the other person. It was so large, like how, even though in five minutes, a lot of the women bonded instantly and just yeah, they were able to introduce and give beautiful introductions about the other person. So that was really beautiful.

Speaker 1: 3:48

We moved into the core value exploration workshop, which was really interesting to hear how different values like were really important to different women and it just shows how unique that we are and you know different women and it just shows how unique that we are. And you know, this was a bit of us coming back to ourselves as well. It was a bit of like us really being able to tap into our essence and really grounding ourselves in who we are, but also like who we want to be. I think that's so important because they're very different things between like who we want to be and what we and who we are. And that session did trigger a few people, but we were able to kind of be in a safe space where we could have those really open conversations like and that's where healing happens. Healing happens when you have really open conversations about things that are really deep down and you just bring it up to release it. So that was really really good. They were able to kind of journal and take some time for reflection in our morning break and then the activity that completely sold the show for the day. So when we are talking about connecting to our authentic selves which I probably should have said at the beginning the whole point of the retreat was like discovering and connecting to our authentic selves, which I probably should have said at the beginning. The whole point of the retreat was like discovering and connecting to our authentic selves.

Speaker 1: 5:07

Um, the body acceptance creative workshop I called it was actually a yoni connection workshop, so yoni is actually vagina, yoni is sanskrit for sacred temple, and the reason why I put this session in is because we talk about body acceptance a lot. We talk about accepting us for who we are, for our flaws, and integrating our light and our dark, because that's what makes us unique and we are shaped by our experiences and trauma but we never talk about vaginas. So, naturally, I came straight in and I was like right, we're going to talk about vaginas, we're going to talk about connection. And somebody even said, like why do we feel such shame about our vaginas when men, on the other hand, are like whoo, look what I got? And we had like a really powerful playlist in the background as women moulded their vaginas out of clay.

Speaker 1: 5:57

So disclaimer, it wasn't a press or life drawing class, okay, it was from imagination, and it actually triggered a lot of conversations about how women didn't know what their yoni looked like or what their vagina looked like, or you know how they've never really connected to that part of their body because it's always been seen as maybe something that's available for their partner but not something that they've connected to. And this, you know, is a really good start. Good start of, like, understanding the power of the yoni and tapping into your divine feminine, to your creativity, to your sensuality, to benefit you, not to be available for men or for your partner. And because you know we're conditioned that way, that's how we're conditioned. We're not ever taught, like about our vaginas being beautiful parts of us. You know, when we look at stuff where we do see vaginas like porn, it's only ever one type of vagina. It's never like the different shapes or the different sizes or how, like vaginas actually change shape as you get older. Vaginas change shape after you have children, like it's. It's a whole thing like and this is a part of our body that we just neglect and we do not connect with.

Speaker 1: 7:05

But I absolutely love how the women on the retreat really just embraced it like they just totally went with it. It was beautiful, um, how women just embraced it and they were like, yeah, well, I'm just going to do this. And you know, we had some beautiful vaginas. Some people even put like little flowers on them or decorated them just as like little works of art, and what we did at the end of the day was we popped them in boxes and the women will be able to take them home, and I provided like a paintbrush and some gold paint so that they can paint it gold, because their vaginas are works of art. Their bodies are works of art. Vaginas are so individual art. Their bodies are works of art. Vaginas are so individual, they're like fingerprints. There's nobody in the world that has the same type of vagina as you or as a woman you know, which I think is a really good fun fact, and we talked about fun facts a little bit more.

Speaker 1: 7:53

But out of all the feedback, this session was the most popular session, like people just really loved it and being creative and giving it a go. I think there was maybe one person who didn't feel like you know, they said they enjoyed it but they're not really creative, so it wasn't like a thing for them. But I just thought, yeah, that creative expression, that reminder of like being creative and how much of a fantastic outlier it is, can create a really healing experience. And also there was lots of giggles, there was lots of like connections and we did kind of talk about bereavement with other people as well, which can be linked to kind of miscarriages and things like that. Um, you know, we did talk about that a little bit as well, which I think is really important. You know, our vagina is our womb space, is so sacred, it's so beautiful and it's just incredible what it can do. So this session was just about appreciating that and tapping into that energy.

Speaker 1: 8:48

Then we jump straight into the guided meditation. Oh my god. So I write my guided meditations like literally nine times out of ten. I'll always write my own guided meditation because I just feel so much more empowered doing that and also by doing it it just helps me really like tap into what I want people to feel like through doing the meditation, because when I'm writing it it's almost like I'm doing it myself. So I wrote a guided meditation and it's basically about starting a new chapter and, oh my gosh, like so throughout the morning, so many people like welled up and they were crying and the crying is a release. Crying is not a bad thing. Crying is releasing and healing. Um, and there was just a couple of people who did definitely have a little tear afterwards whilst we were having lunch and chilling out and things like that. It was so, so beautiful, um, so, yeah, uh, the meditation did really open up a lot for people and, by this point, like the women had bonded so so much, it felt like a sisterhood and people could be open and honest about what they were feeling through the afternoon.

Speaker 1: 9:54

So, after the guided meditation, we went into lunch, we all had some food together and then it was time for the spa access, where women had access to a plunge pool, where everyone was like egging each other on to get in the plunge pool because it was cold. And, yeah, everyone, just yeah. I loved the support from everyone. It was like, yeah, just get in, just do it, just do it. And then, yeah, it was. Yeah, there was a hot tub, which, you know, I felt like this was probably where a lot of meaningful conversations had. I could overhear some things, but it's just where a lot of meaningful conversations were, were definitely being held, um, and connecting with other women, which was so lush. And then, yet, they also had a steam steam room as well, a nice steam room, a sauna. So, yeah, that was lush, they were lush, and the weather outside was so beautiful. Considering it was October, it was like 20 odd degrees. It was just mad, um. So yeah, and then, you know, as part of it we had a garden, so people would sit in the garden and enjoy.

Speaker 1: 10:54

We did have a photographer come just to take like candid little photos of people, um, and just to get people to just being used to being on camera, maybe when they're not in their most glamorous self, not because it's nothing, you know, because there's nothing wrong with that. Being your authentic self means you being raw at your at your core. Like you know, it's about just being like, yeah, this is me, and if my hair and makeup isn't perfect, it's absolutely fine and everyone took part in it and everyone was just absolutely beautiful. Like you know, I'm very excited to see the photos and, yeah, today is the day after the retreat, which I really just needed some time to to process this. So this is why I'm doing the podcast episode at the same time, because I really need to process what happened yesterday, not because anything bad happened, but because so much good happened.

Speaker 1: 11:42

There were definitely lessons learned for me, but oh my god, there were so many good things. Like I can't. I can't believe I put on a day like I did. I like I sound really big-headed and really like obnoxious, but honestly I really can't. It really facilitated a lot of healing for people and it was absolutely amazing. And in the afternoon I was able to give some people some reiki. I was able to give some people a tarot reading. Unfortunately, I couldn't get around everybody on my list, which I'm still feeling forever guilty about, but yeah, I um, yeah, I was just feeling really, yeah, really lush to be able to help people.

Speaker 1: 12:21

And then at the end we came back with the cacao ceremony. So we kind of looked at what we had liked about the day, what we reflected on, and a lot of people said the community element was one of the most important parts of the day for them, which, yeah, the girls just bonded so well and you know, like I just said earlier, your vibe attracts your tribe and everyone just bonded so well. And you know, like I just said earlier, your vibe attracts your tribe and everyone just bonded so well. And you know, everyone opened up and everyone was able to close down and go about themselves on. You know, go about their day afterwards in a really safe way, which is really important for me.

Speaker 1: 12:54

And during the cacao ceremony, I got everyone to write love notes to each other. So just little notes where they can write little love notes to each other about what they loved about them, what they like about them, and yeah, I think this was just so perfect. I didn't even start an envelope for me because I thought you know, it's a bit odd for me to be like tell me you love me as your facilitator but one of the girls made me an envelope and all the girls put something in there for me and I was like, oh, they're so beautiful, it was so beautiful. And when I read my notes back, I just burst out crying. And when I read the feedback, I was crying because I'm just so happy that I was able to facilitate and hold that space for people in a way that was really, really well received.

Speaker 1: 13:37

And when we were leaving, everyone just like totally didn't want to go back, like people just didn't want to go, didn't want to leave. Uh, I felt like we could have definitely done it for longer and maybe next year we'll look at maybe an overnight retreat, because that would be left, um, but yeah, there's definitely going to be another retreat and I feel like very confident that people did find the strength to connect to their, to their authentic selves. And connecting to your authentic self is looking at all the good things about you, but looking at the things that are less desirable. They're in your dark side or your shadow side, never your bad side. I don't ever think we have a bad side.

Speaker 1: 14:15

I always think that we have experiences and trauma that shape us, that create traits within us that we find less desirable or society finds less desirable, like jealousy. You know that comes from insecurity. Where did that come from it's? Do you know what I mean? There's always a reason for the way that we behave, the reasons that we are kind, the reason we are generous, the reasons we are grateful, along with the times where we are jealous, we are spiteful, we are angry, we are upset, we do horrible things. This is all part of being a human and like this is shared humanity, like this is common humanity. We all have dark sides of us. We all have bad sides of us, which I like. I just I don't ever call it bad, but if that's how you identify, that's how you identify.

Speaker 1: 15:01

I just think that we do have that side of ourselves where we take a hard look at it and we go. Oh, my God, I really wish I didn't do those things, but I don't want you to shame yourself for it. I don't want you to shame that dark side of you, because that dark side of you has helped you get through life that is shaped by your experiences, by your trauma, and to truly accept yourself and your authentic self is integrating the light and the darkness. That's how you become one, and you know, just like the universe or the world, like we have sun and we have the moon, we have light, we have dark. You know, when we have yin and yang, we have light and dark, and it's a balance. We need to have the darker side to be able to balance our light, and we wouldn't be us if we didn't have both sides of us, and I hope that was the message that really came across in the retreat as well, whilst we did everything, but those are the activities and those are the things that we did.

Speaker 1: 15:58

There were so many breakthroughs, there were so many tears and releases and, yeah, I things that we did. There were so many breakthroughs, there were so many tears and releases and, yeah, I think a lot of the healing will happen after the retreat as well, and also, like the goodie bags went down quite well, there was like a little self-love oil, a little discount voucher for me. There was a crystal in there which is a tiger's eye crystal, which I totally forgot to tell everyone that tiger's eye is very good for being courageous and brave, which you know to be your authentic self means. You have to be courageous and brave and you know. Obviously they had their box with their gold paint and everything. I'm sure they had other bits and pieces. Oh, yeah, they had some tea. They had some tea which was provided by Moon Magic, which also provided the cacao. So, shout out to Moon Magic because she's just, she's amazing, she's absolutely amazing. Um, she provides, like this ceremonial cacao, which is just beautiful. So I highly recommend. Not only is her instagram the most authentic, like authentic aesthetic thing, it is just so, so beautiful, um, in terms of the taste and the quality. And it comes as a block, which is the most authentic ceremonial cacao way, because you have the cocoa butter in there.

Speaker 1: 17:08

And, yeah, I really prepared it with the intention of love, opening the heart space, but also giving loads of healing and love, love through the heart. So the retreat completely blew my mind. It completely blew other people's minds. I'm still processing the fact that I facilitated such a day. I didn't have any help, all the activities and stuff I planned and I made happen. I did get some inspiration about the clay activity from a friend. He suggested that he had seen something similar and then I decided to make it happen. So I'm not going to take the full credit for original ideas that weren't original, but, yeah, there was definitely things that happened that I absolutely just just loved and I'm just, yeah, I just feel like a big puddle of gratitude right now and I'm just so very grateful.

Speaker 1: 17:57

There will be another retreat in spring. Um, this one I've already planned the content. I've already planned the content. I like, yeah, as I was doing this retreat, I found different ideas and I was like, oh no, I'll keep that for my next one or for my next one. So, yeah, we definitely got like another retreat in the bag for springtime and, yeah, if you're interested in like joining me on a retreat day, then just um, slide me a dm, I'll put you on a wait list.

Speaker 1: 18:26

Um, spaces won't be released until next year, um, but yeah, I think next year's scene will all be about self-love, um, and I've got some mad activities planned for self-love, for radical self-acceptance. So, yeah, watch this, watch this space, guys. Honestly, but yeah, that was the retreat. I'm so very grateful for everybody who came. And yeah, if you want to learn more, if you want to see the pictures, head over to my Instagram, tiktok, all of that type of stuff. And yeah, I'm going to leave it there. I'm just going to leave it there on a really happy note and just say thanks to everybody. And yeah, if you're interested in retreats, let me know. And yeah, just have a wonderful rest of your day. I'm going to spend the rest of my day processing, enjoying and just basking in the grateful energy. So, yeah, happy Monday.