Open Mic Mavericks
Open Mic Mavericks: First World Problems, Roommate Snafus, and Hilarious Anecdotes
Ever found yourself overwhelmed by an endless list of streaming shows or baffled by how your wireless earbuds get tangled up in your pocket? You're not alone, and we've got you covered in the world premiere of Open Mic Mavericks! Join Patrick Bass and Tom Russell as we kick off with our "First World Problems" segment, where we tackle these hilariously trivial issues that everyone can relate to. We promise you'll laugh out loud as we unravel the mysteries behind these everyday annoyances.
What would you do if your partner binge-watched your favorite show without you, or worse, accidentally sent a risque text to the family group chat? Our "Roommate Food Snafu" segment dives into these modern relationship and tech mishaps. We debate whether to laugh it off or blame it on a tech glitch, and even discuss the best ways to confront that roommate who keeps raiding your snacks. From hot sauce pranks to heartfelt confrontations, we've got plenty of advice mixed with humor.
Ready for some nostalgic travel tales and ethical dilemmas? Our final chapters take you through mall adventures, run-ins with SEAL Team 6, and the challenges of maintaining integrity in the workplace. We'll share stories from the early 2000s, hilarious military anecdotes, and the sticky situations IT professionals face when they find compromising content on a superior’s computer. Stay tuned until the end for exciting news about our new distribution plans and channel launches. Keep the blue side up and enjoy the show!
Ever found yourself overwhelmed by an endless list of streaming shows or baffled by how your wireless earbuds get tangled up in your pocket? You're not alone, and we've got you covered in the world premiere of Open Mic Mavericks! Join Patrick Bass and Tom Russell as we kick off with our "First World Problems" segment, where we tackle these hilariously trivial issues that everyone can relate to. We promise you'll laugh out loud as we unravel the mysteries behind these everyday annoyances.
What would you do if your partner binge-watched your favorite show without you, or worse, accidentally sent a risque text to the family group chat? Our "Roommate Food Snafu" segment dives into these modern relationship and tech mishaps. We debate whether to laugh it off or blame it on a tech glitch, and even discuss the best ways to confront that roommate who keeps raiding your snacks. From hot sauce pranks to heartfelt confrontations, we've got plenty of advice mixed with humor.
Ready for some nostalgic travel tales and ethical dilemmas? Our final chapters take you through mall adventures, run-ins with SEAL Team 6, and the challenges of maintaining integrity in the workplace. We'll share stories from the early 2000s, hilarious military anecdotes, and the sticky situations IT professionals face when they find compromising content on a superior’s computer. Stay tuned until the end for exciting news about our new distribution plans and channel launches. Keep the blue side up and enjoy the show!
Hey man, what's up? Hey, dude, how's it going? Man, I'm all bummed out cause, you know, life sucks. Oh, you got some problems. Yeah, man, no man, I got problems. Nah, my internet's not working. Dude, dang dude, you do got some problems. Welcome to Open Mic Mavericks, the show where no topic is too trivial, no opinion too bold and no problem to first world. Now here's the host of Open Mic Mavericks. It's Patrick Bass and Tom Russell. Hey, hey, hey, everybody, it's the world premiere of Open Mic Mavericks. Tom, can you believe it? All this time, all this time, all this time. And, by the way, my name's Patrick Bass and I got my compatriot over here, tom, say hello.
Speaker 2:Hey, I'm Tom Russell, I'm just. I'm here for the excited for the first new show.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, we've been planning this for I don't know, maybe, maybe a total of 20 minutes. No, but the whole concept of this program is uh, uh, you know, many of you know I've got another uh show that we do, the Patrick Bass show on this very serious interview type show where we're trying to uncover the mysteries of the world, and we just needed something where we could be ourselves and be a little crazy. And, uh, tom was one of the first guests I had on the Patrick Bass show and, believe it or not, tom did you know that is our most listened to episode ever.
Speaker 2:That's wild. That's what that still blows my mind.
Speaker 1:And and, uh, I can't believe it, and so I'm like. You know, we're sitting here trying to find a format that works and that show's doing pretty good. I don't know, tom, if you knew this, but Patrick Bass shows right now in the top 15% of all podcasts worldwide.
Speaker 2:Oh, wow, okay. Yeah, I knew you were doing well, I didn't know it was going that well, well, I've almost made enough to buy a coffee. That and 25 cents will get you a cup of coffee.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but you know, I needed something where we could just let our hair down and be ourselves, man, and so I hope that's what this is. Yeah, yeah, I like the concept. I'm excited to give it a try. Well, let's, let's get into it. We've, we've got a little episode or a little segment that I put together and it's called first world problems, and people have been, ever since I started, uh, advertising this time, people have been writing in, believe it or not, and, uh, they want to know, they want to know, uh, how we can help them solve their first world problems. So, um, so here's the first one. And they get better, they get better as they go. Okay, uh, dear patrick and tom, my streaming service has too many good shows. How do I choose? What do you do?
Speaker 2:that's that's uh.
Speaker 1:I don't think I've ever had that one before, Because when I've got like Hulu and Netflix and a couple of, and there could be like 20 channels of absolute crap all on at the same time. So I want to know what streaming service they're on first of all.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was going to say I usually have the opposite problem of I've got the streaming sites and, uh, it's all trash.
Speaker 2:Hey, you remember digging remember when we were kids and we had those little cable boxes and you tune it to the playboy channel and it was all blurry, right, yep and it, but every once in a while every once in a while the planets would align and for like a split second you'd see a booty yep, I was going to say you'd see the wiggly lines and be like oh, I think I saw a nip so I don't know what streaming service they're on, but please text us and let us know, because I want to subscribe.
Speaker 1:Okay, no real advice for that, except Please text us and let us know, because I want to subscribe.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah.
Speaker 1:No real advice for that, except good luck. Dear Patrick and Tom, my wireless earbuds keep getting tangled in my pocket.
Speaker 2:What do I do? You know? That reminds me of the old. If an electric train is heading south at 60 miles an hour and the wind is blowing north and you know however many miles an hour, what way is the smoke blowing? And the answer is there is no smoke. As an electric train like, how do wireless earbuds get tangled up in your pocket? There's no wire.
Speaker 1:I think this guy is smoking some of the devil's lettuce man, I don't know I can't tell if it's.
Speaker 2:It's uh yeah it might be.
Speaker 1:What else is in your pocket, dude?
Speaker 2:no, I, I uh, when I read that when I was like I you know, I'm not sure, I'm not sure if somebody's trying to troll us or somebody's just really really high you need to get a little mini butler that you can carry around in your pocket and and who can take care of trivial stuff like that for you.
Speaker 1:Okay, now. Now this one, this one's getting a little more into the heart of the matter. Okay, uh, when you're whistling by tom and y'all are watching a show together, does it piss you off when they watch shows, the episodes ahead of you, yes, okay. So it says dear pat, dear patrick, and tom, my partner, has started watching our favorite show without me. Oh, should I confront them secretly, watch ahead or just pretend that I'm okay with the ultimate betrayal?
Speaker 2:oh, that's a tough one. Uh depends on the partner. If it's me I'm confronting.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Our favorite show is coming on again the second season. Did you watch the first season of Tulsa King?
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, I really liked it.
Speaker 1:Okay. So they've started filming the second season. It's coming on in early September. I don't know if you saw that, but we're waiting for Tulsa Kings season two. Now, if, tracy, you know if something's going on or I'm at work or you know, whatever I get it, but don't go binge-watching the entire season. One or two seasons is okay, or one or two shows.
Speaker 2:I'm a simple man For me. Just ask. Nine times out of ten I'm gonna be like, yeah, just watch it, I'll catch up. But to do it without even asking, it's just disrespectful and also to the person who wrote that in.
Speaker 1:If that's your ultimate betrayal, you're doing okay. You've got some living to do, buddy. Here's another one, this, and I think you know what. I think this happens a lot. This next one, dear patrick and tom, I accidentally sent a risque text to my family group chat instead of my partner. Do I play it off as a joke or do I fake a tech malfunction? Uh, so, and, and then never let it happen again.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, see, for me it depends on the, the context, like how, how big is, how deep did you go? Did you send like an eggplant emoji? You could play that off like oh you know, I just, we're gonna have eggplant parmesan yeah, we're not talking about.
Speaker 1:We're not talking about a wiener pick, are we?
Speaker 2:yeah? If we're yeah, are you talking about some of the most ratchet shit you could think of? Then yeah, oh my God, it was hacked. It was so weird, somebody cut in on my stuff.
Speaker 1:What do you just immediately? Oh mistype.
Speaker 2:Oh damn, autocorrect.
Speaker 1:Have you ever had a really embarrassing autocorrect?
Speaker 2:Not embarrassing, other than the fact that it I'm embarrassed that my phone thinks I'm that stupid.
Speaker 1:I'll tell you what I hate. I hate when I get something that's like it's auto corrected and then I type it again, trying to type to it correctly, and it auto corrects it again and then, like on the third try, I'm like damn it, I give up yeah, just use another word.
Speaker 1:Yeah, boy, I don't know, have you ever had? I'll tell you what. Way back in the day I used to work at IBM, long, long time ago, and I mean this was before you know, remote work was even a thing and I was on a conference call with a bunch of people in Raleigh. I was at home, had little kids at the time, and they were acting up and everything, and I thought I was on mute and I screamed shut the hell up and the the meeting got strangely quiet and and I hear you okay, man, and I was like, oh my god at that point you gotta lean into it that was embarrassing just lean into it then like I just couldn't take anymore, I need some time off yeah, I almost got some.
Speaker 1:Okay here's. Here's another one. I this one. I don't know if I can relate to I'm. I'm out of this demographic but, dear patrick and tom, I saw my ex's new partner on a dating app. Should I swipe right to mess with them or just stay out of it and be the bigger person I don't see that that could go either way.
Speaker 2:I'm 50, 50 good for me. Personally, I live my life trying to avoid drama at all costs, but something like that is almost too good to pass up.
Speaker 1:So I don't know I saw this revenge site and it was really cool. They had a really cool idea go on like craigslist or something and post on, post on their uh. Starting december 26th, I'm accepting all donations of used christmas trees for compost, please leave them in my front yard at this address and put their put their address. I thought that was creative, but you better bounce it off a few. A few anonymous anonymizers yeah, yeah, that's.
Speaker 2:That's a little sketchy.
Speaker 1:I don't know how that's gonna go we're not advocating that you break the law, but if you do, send us pictures pictures anonymously, please. Yeah, uh, let's see here. Um, dear patrick and tom, my roommate keeps eating food but claims that they thought it was theirs. Should I start spiking my snacks with hot sauce or just move out of the place where, uh, and move to where people respect my personal boundaries?
Speaker 2:yeah, moving sounds like work. Um, hot sauce sounds like the answer there. At least hot sauce is being nice. I would find something that's going to hang them up for a couple of days. Keep them in the bathroom for at least two or three days.
Speaker 1:Here's the other thing, and this is the dad in me coming out. Maybe they need food. Do they have money for food? I mean, are they doing it out of necessity, maybe?
Speaker 2:maybe you can help them out, I don't know and while I understand as a dad myself, uh, the marine of me is like I don't, I don't, fucking care, yeah did you have you seen that if they're a roommate, they're a grown-ass adult. They can feed themselves?
Speaker 1:yeah, uh. Have you seen that facebook picture where this guy, he puts his lunch in the uh employee refrigerator and it says I have four shrimp and five thousand rice.
Speaker 2:Do not it reminds me what was that? The old mitch headburn rice is good when you want to eat a thousand or something yeah, man, that guy was.
Speaker 1:I loved that guy. He was awesome. Great, yeah, he was amazing. When he says I went to go buy a donut and they're like do you need a receipt man?
Speaker 2:that guy was. I loved that guy.
Speaker 1:He was awesome yeah he was amazing when he says I went to go buy a donut and they're like do you need a receipt? I'm like there's no reason to bring ink and paper into this. You give me the donut, I'll give you the dollar His delivery was 90% of his act and it was fantastic.
Speaker 2:You know else who? A great delivery, but in a completely different, like end of the spectrum is. Uh, I think he's still around, but I think he has a terrible drug problem.
Speaker 1:I could be wrong, david tell oh man, I haven't seen that guy in a long time is he is he on dope?
Speaker 2:he, he had he used to have that show I think it was on uh, comedy central, like late night something. He would like go around and and shadow people who did like jobs late at night, like you know, street cleaners or what, what have you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think during that he got into drugs pretty bad, just because his schedule was so wonky you know, in like 2010 I was doing stand-up and I I was on the comedy central tour for a while and I was yeah I was opening for brian hainer and lisa lampanelli and andrew schultz and a few others and yeah, tour mostly around uh, texas and arizona I did.
Speaker 1:That was a lot of fun yeah, and I was, I was gonna do it full-time, but let me tell you that is a lifestyle. I just couldn't do it, man, you know.
Speaker 2:So it was fun. It was fun. I don't think I'd have the testicular fortitude to stand up on top of a stage like that anyway. But even if I did, I don't think I could live that life.
Speaker 1:That's a young man's gig well, and let me tell you, some of those guys are acting, some of them are not acting.
Speaker 2:Let me just tell you.
Speaker 1:But no, brian Hainer was the one that got me on the tour because I had done a, I'd done a showcase and open for him. You know you want to come on this thing and I thought it was one of those casting couch things and I was like Brian, I'm not going to.
Speaker 2:He's like I'm only going to go so far.
Speaker 1:Calm down, Tiger.
Speaker 2:I'm not saying I won't. Twenty dollars is twenty dollars, but I have my dignity. Ok, here's.
Speaker 1:here's the next one, let's see when do they go. Too many one, let's see where did it go. Too many windows. Let's see here. Dear Patrick and Tom, my boss just sent me a Facebook friend request. Do I accept it and censor my posts, or decline and prepare for the awkward conversation at work?
Speaker 2:Accept it and then create a whole another Facebook that they don't know about and post nothing on their own.
Speaker 1:Doesn't Facebook have that thing where you can like be a friend with somebody, but put them on restriction?
Speaker 2:full disclosure. I don't have any social media anymore. I haven't for over a year. At this point, I just I don't know. I'm much happier without it.
Speaker 1:here's the thing like if, if your boss is also at the point where y'all are friends, I kind of get that, but maybe you should let the other person kind of make that first move. But if this is just a blind, out-of-the-blue friend request, I don't think that's appropriate man.
Speaker 2:No, I agree, I don't know, man. I don't know social media etiquette these days. I just I agree with you because back in the day that's how it was, but now I don't know. Is Facebook just like your business card that you hand out to people? I don't know.
Speaker 1:I think that's what LinkedIn is for. I mean, if you're, if your boss sends you a LinkedIn request, yeah, accept it. Facebook that's, that's private. In fact, you know, I've recently went through my Facebook thing and I had I don't know hundreds, hundreds of people on there that I'm quote friends with. I don't know who most of these people were, and so I decided, hey, if if you're on my friends list, it's gotta be one. I have to know you in real life, like we talk outside of Facebook and we have some kind of or we're related or something like that. And if not, you got to go and I cleaned it out. I think I have like 38 people in my friends list right now. Yeah, you know.
Speaker 2:I got rid of it for several reasons, but one of which is like I found that when I met up with people you know, you ever meet with an old friend you haven't talked to in a while. It's sure you catch up and it's always a great time. With things like facebook, you don't have that. They're like oh yeah, my, my daughter's going to high school.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I know, I saw it's kind of got nothing to talk about yeah, it's like I I'd much rather have those moments where I'm with the person and I get to know. It's almost like getting to know them all over again, as opposed to following the minutia of their life on a screen. You know, I don't know, just call me old fashioned. I just I, um, I did it for a while and I didn't like it. I ended up getting rid of it all.
Speaker 1:So this is really corny on me and I'll admit it. One, I love little kitten pictures, I'm serious, so I'm on there for that. And then, two, my, my kids and my grandkids are on there, so that makes a lot of sense. You know they live in another city. If I want to stay up with them, I better be on Facebook, because they're not going to oh my God, they're not going to send me anything in the mail, the mail, mail, the mail. I haven't gotten a father's day card.
Speaker 2:No, I'm kidding man. If I get something in the mail that's not junk, it's.
Speaker 1:It's a day to celebrate because you know what would be terrifying getting a father's day card from a somebody you don't know. Dear dad, oh you cold.
Speaker 2:You just feel this cold, chill run down your spine, you start going through the list, the mental list. Did I, could it possibly be I was young and stupid. I have no idea what I did.
Speaker 1:That's like that old saturday night life skit. Sure I should have used protection, but when's the next time I'm going to be in thailand?
Speaker 2:I was gonna. I was gonna say, uh, if I ever get a Father's Day card from the Philippines, I'm going to be real scared.
Speaker 1:You, my dad. That's probably really Sorry, not sorry your mother was amazing. How's mom doing PS? Who's mom? Yeah, exactly, who's mom doing PS? Who's mom? Who's your mom?
Speaker 2:I may have only known her stage name, so you're going to have to give me some deets.
Speaker 1:Oh, you mean cinnamon.
Speaker 2:Having said that, if you ever get a chance to go to the Philippines, go. It's amazing.
Speaker 1:Here's the next one. Oh my God, Dear Patrick and Tom, Now I can relate to this one. I have too many unread emails and the number is giving me anxiety. Should I declare email bankruptcy and delete them all and start fresh?
Speaker 2:yes, that's exactly what I would do yeah, yeah, you know what I did.
Speaker 1:I had the same gmail account forever and, um, you know it. Just frankly, it brought back a lot of bad memories. I deleted it and got a new one, and then I found out how much shit was tied to it, and I promise you that it is impossible to get an old Gmail account back once you have deleted it. They reserve the name forever. I've tried contacting Google, I've tried everything and it's gone forever, let me tell you. And so I just had to bite the bullet, because you know I'd go buy software and it would be tied to that email and all that other stuff, and I felt really good about deleting it at the time, tom. And then reality, oh boy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I would. I would advise caution on doing something like that. But you know and that's just because I've made those same mistakes before in my life where you know you do something like that and then so many things are tied to it Keep it around for a bit, just don't look at it, start the new one, and then, as things pop up, you'll be like, oh okay, I'll go back.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's how I am. I've got an old iCloud account back when it was mecom. I don't know if you remember that.
Speaker 2:No, oh, yeah, this was back before I cloud dot com. It was me dot com and I've got an old Apple me dot com address that I never use, but I've still got it. It's tied to me, probably forever. It's more permanent than like a social security number you might. You might find it disgusting. I have never purchased or owned an Apple product in my entire life, really, and that was not by accident. You know?
Speaker 1:wow, um, I've never known one. You're like a unicorn. We should capture you and and and analyze you and figure out what it what it takes to replicate you. No, it's like Put you in a lab.
Speaker 2:It's kind of like the saying that I've heard before in regards to a lot of things Not everyone who owns an Apple product is an asshole, but every asshole owns an Apple product.
Speaker 1:Oh, which group am I in?
Speaker 2:No, it's just that they weren't for me, you knowi and all it was just I don't know, it's just, I get it never clicked with me, so I just never. But they're, I mean, they're good products, I just they're not my, yeah, my jam, I guess they're.
Speaker 1:They're very consumer friendly, uh and and and. So this is really geeky. I mean, the world knows that I'm in cybersecurity. From a cybersecurity perspective, I love my MacBook because it's based on a Linux BSD kernel and I can just drop into a command line and I feel very at home and then when I feel like clicking on Windows, they have a lot of pretty windows. So you know, I could go either way, honestly, but I guess I'm a fan boy. I've got an old Mac SE sitting down here at my feet right now.
Speaker 2:Now I always kind of I related them to kind of like the Toyotas. You remember how the Camry was like the longest running, best car and blah blah blah. Oh yeah, I never owned one, never really liked it myself. But my advice to someone who wants to own a car and doesn't want to know anything about how it works get a Toyota. It'll just work. You don't have to worry about it.
Speaker 2:You have to worry about it. You take it for your regular maintenance and it'll just work. You don't have to dig into it, it's just going to be there when you need it. Toyota's are great.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, my wife had a forerunner. Yeah, she had a forerunner and she loved it. But two things. One, they're really freaking expensive, even the very basic ones. You get a forerunner with no options. It's expensive. And so we had this thing and, uh, you this thing, and it started getting up there in age and miles and stuff like that, and I was like she wanted to get something different. And so we looked at a Subaru and I'd say, well, she got this Subaru Outback. I love this thing. We're a Subaru family now, period. I love this thing. It's the most amazing and it's got a screen in it. I swear to God, it's the most amazing and it's got a tom. It's got a screen in it, I swear to god, it's like 15 inches diagonal.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's huge, is that? Is that like the, the center console?
Speaker 1:yeah, it's really cool and uh, but it gets about as many updates as windows does. I'm we're updating this thing like twice a week, I'm not kidding do you know?
Speaker 2:is that a service you gotta pay for?
Speaker 1:uh, the base service? No, we've. We got the. We've got some of the add ons. You know, 10 or 15 bucks a month and we got some of those add ons. But it's the base OS that they keep updating, and maybe because the car had sat for a couple of years and it wasn't being used. Maybe it's just getting caught up, but yeah, yeah, that could be it. Yeah, no, I have a 2013 buick verano that's what I drive.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm driving a 20, I'm driving a 2014 uh, yukon. So yeah, those are nice gas guzzler. Yeah, I mean it's. Yeah, as long as you don't mind killing a small rainforest every time you start it up, which I don't actually I traded in a hybrid Camry for it. Oh, really yeah, that's well like, I don't know. Like I said, for me Toyota's not my jam, but I get it. People like it.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And it works.
Speaker 1:It's effective. It was an Avalon, sorry, oh well, it's still A hybrid Avalon.
Speaker 2:They're good vehicles. It was a nice car. It was a nice car.
Speaker 1:It was hard to get in and out. Of. It had this weird overhang on the roof and I don't know. I got neck problems. It was hard to get in and out of, so I sold it and got this thing.
Speaker 2:Well, you're a big guy, I'm short, I can drive a go-kart and I'd probably be okay.
Speaker 1:Did you?
Speaker 2:just call me fat. No, I'm big as in tall Speaking of Toyota. Um, speaking of toyota, though, did you see the? Um, oh, the new car, the new trucks that they just came out with? They're like little work trucks for like 12 grand. No, yeah, they're insane. I'm sure the united states won't let us sell them, but you know, they were. Uh, I don't know, I just it's, it's impressive. They, they've just released these new, updated vehicles, and that's all I have to say about it, because I don't know anything more about it. But the articles that I've seen are like oh, $12,000 for these new Toyotas.
Speaker 1:Hey, this is going back a little bit, but thinking of small, inexpensive cars. You remember the Yugo?
Speaker 2:I remember the name.
Speaker 1:The 80s it was like a $4,000 car. It was barely street legal and could do about 45 miles an hour, I remember that name yeah, when they brought them over from yugoslavia hence the name yugo they weren't street legal so they had to go and bolt on some extra brake lights on the back. So they all had on these awkward they were almost like bike reflectors on the back of the car. It was wow, I knew, I knew somebody that had one I?
Speaker 2:I have to look that up because I've not heard. I've heard the name. I've never actually seen them the. The biggest joke I ever heard growing up was about the gremlins the gremlin.
Speaker 1:Well, I guarantee there are no yugos on the road anymore. They they couldn't have, could not have survived better reclaim them, yeah hey, you're, you're, you're in IT. Like me, do you end up doing a lot of IT work for your friends and family?
Speaker 2:Yes, for free yes.
Speaker 1:Yeah, more than I care to admit. Here's the next. Here's our last one. Okay, dear Patrick and Tom, my friend wanted me to work on their phone and fix a problem they were having. While doing it, I found some interesting photos in their gallery. Do I confront them or just use it for information, potentially for future blackmailing purposes? All right, Storytime Storytime.
Speaker 2:I'm going to try to use as many vagaries as possible to keep this. I don't want to use anyone's name, but I was working IT at a place, okay, and at this place, one of the people's machines, one of the higher ups machines, kind of shit, the bed and they got a new one and it's like, oh, I need to get my old stuff off of there. Can you do that for me? You know, hard drive was all screwed up so I had to, like, recover it. Well, I recovered, I get everything off and I find a video of him Keep in mind he's a married man with a newborn baby and I find a video of him and his secretary doing things they shouldn't be doing.
Speaker 2:Come on, I find a couple videos like that and I had that same dilemma. I was like, do I hold on to these? Do I keep these? But in the end, my, my, uh, my morality went out and I was like now I got rid of them. I was like you know, I don't again. Like I said earlier, I spend my whole life trying to avoid drama, so I was like nope, not my place, not my monkey, not my circus.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I just got rid of it. The next time you have to work or deal with them, it's like it's so awkward.
Speaker 2:I have a feeling he knew, because when I gave him back his files everything was there except for those Ooh. So I think he knew and he was always really nice to me after that.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because he's like, on the off chance that you've got something on me, is there anything that I can do for you?
Speaker 2:You need anything, anything at all, and that was quite the dilemma in my case, just because, like I said, he's married with a newborn baby and I'm like come on man.
Speaker 1:What do I do?
Speaker 2:It's not, but at the same time it's like you know. I can't interject myself in this. This isn't my, it's not my place, yeah.
Speaker 1:Like you said, it's, I don't know man. We're not the world's police. We're not, no man. We're not the world's police. We're not the world's police, no, exactly.
Speaker 2:I can only control what happens to me literally, and the older I get, the more I realize I cannot control anyone. I can't control how anyone thinks how anyone feels.
Speaker 1:I mean, if his wife came to you and said Now, tom, it'd be one thing if she asked you outright, but interjecting yourself into that, I mean God. But that guy shouldn't have put you in that position. That's horrible.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah and that's just it. And then I thought, well, maybe I should anonymously do it. And I'm like you know, I don't know. For all I know, those videos were from before he was even married, I don't know. I kept trying to justify it to myself. I don't want to make more out of this if she comes to me and she asks out of the blue.
Speaker 1:Sure, I'll answer those questions.
Speaker 2:Maybe they were on a break maybe, man, I tried to put that behind me so fast, though, like once I made that decision I was like, okay, never thinking about it again the old friends thing we were on a break.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, a break did you know you want a?
Speaker 2:break, but I hope that helps answer that question um I used to work.
Speaker 1:I used to work with this guy and we would go on business trips together and it was kind of the same thing, man, because as soon as he got on the airplane, off came his wedding ring. Oh man, and I was just like, really dude, because I don't play that. I don't play, I'm a fun guy, I like to have fun, but I don't mess. I don't mess around like that, I don't play those games. Dude, you know what I'm, it's just not no, no, no, no, no no, once you've made the vow, you keep it.
Speaker 2:It is. It is interesting. I had a buddy uh, speaking of like traveling, like that when I was in the Marine Corps, whenever we would go on liberty on shore because we were on ship for most of the time we'd go on liberty on shore. I had one buddy and I won't use his name, great guy, one of my best friends, but he knew himself and he was like keep me away from those places. So we would go out, we'd go drinking and at the time our our you know, mother's milk was a crown of Coke. And if you're ever in Southeast Asia, trying to find crown of Coke was like trying to find hen's teeth. You're just, you're not going to do it. So we ended up switching to one 51. We were young and stupid. Anyway, I spent most of that deployment keeping him like we'd go into a strip club or something like that, or we would go into a bar, not and you don't know, because not everything's in english and you get in there and you're like we got to turn around and get the fuck out of here.
Speaker 1:Way too tempting in here how many donkey ladies are there, oh?
Speaker 2:yeah, you think there was just one right. You think it'd be one famous donkey lady. No, it's a whole profession.
Speaker 1:The donkey's like oh, she does that all the time.
Speaker 2:Oh, funny story Real quick. I'm sorry, I don't want to derail too much, but we were in Pattaya Beach, thailand, and in Pattaya Beach, thailand, there's a street you know before you ever go on Liberty, before you hit a port, they give you a safety brief on what places to avoid. Things to avoid, you know, things not to do. It might be a cultural taboo, right. And they told us about this one street called Boys Town and that's where all the trannies are, apparently, oh God. And they're like stay off this street. There's underage, there's tranny, there's nothing good on this street, there's nothing on the street that you want. We're like okay, not a problem.
Speaker 2:So my buddy and I were going around visiting different places and there's just like five-story mall. So we go in there. And this is back in the days when malls were a thing, right like the internet wasn't, wasn't really even, it was in its infancy and there was no amazon. So you still went to the mall to buy shit. So we're at at the mall, we're walking around, I think we went and we got fitted for suits, and then we're leaving and we're walking down the street. There's a street that parallels the beach, so we're walking down the street that's parallel on the beach and then there's side streets that kind of go straight up it from the parallel.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:So I'm walking down and I look down the side street, just kind of out of the corner of my eye, and I see this big windows, like you know, like microsoft windows symbol, and it's like discount software, blah blah, and I I knew what that meant.
Speaker 1:I'm a pirate in software so it's like, oh, it's gonna be dirt cheap.
Speaker 2:So I just I beeline. I'm the nerd. I'm beelining down there and my, my two buddies are behind me and I'm walking down the street and all of a sudden I hear like whistling and catcalling and I'm like what the? And I look around me and I'm surrounded on either side by like tranny bars. So I start running down the street.
Speaker 1:AGI.
Speaker 2:I accidentally went down Boys Town AGI, I was like goddammit you money, sick of that, I love you a long time. That was so dude. There was a legit moment where I was scared. Like this is how I die, like this is.
Speaker 1:But I was your family's like. Well, where did you find him? He was a, he was.
Speaker 2:He was a human pincushion.
Speaker 1:He was deep behind enemy lines.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was learned in by cheap software. Goddammit, it wasn't my fault.
Speaker 1:Oh my god.
Speaker 2:Hey, I did get at the time Granted, remember this is like the year 2000. I think I got Windows ME for really cheap.
Speaker 1:You might have gotten something else really cheap too.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I may have gotten something else for free. Hey, listen in my youth that was a piece of man candy. Oh boy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, those safety briefings. We're trying to keep the rapings down.
Speaker 2:Nobody warned me about the cheap software. That should have been in the safety brief.
Speaker 1:It's like we got party copies of windows over here. We got $10 Rolexes over here. I used to I used to work on watches, tom, and this this old lady brings in a watch one day. This is a true story and she says my, my husband has lady brings in a watch one day this is a true story and she says my husband has owned this watch for like 20 years. I need to get it fixed. I open it up. It's got a battery running a cheap little Chinese movement and I'm like so you say you've had this for a while, yeah, it won't wind anymore. I don't know how to tell you this lady, but Rolexes don't use batteries and they don't have Chinese movements. So she was not happy. They paid like $1,000 at a pawn shop for this thing and had it all these years and wanted to have it cleaned and serviced and things like that. And boy, it was fake, fake, fake.
Speaker 2:Yeah, somebody picked that up in Southeast Asia. Yeah, speaking of just real quick, same trip, petty Beach, thailand. We're walking along the street. I was AAV company, which is an amphibious assault vehicle. It's separate from your regular infantry battalion. They're their own entity and uh, there was this old gunnery sergeant who was in charge of the aav guys and uh, he just always had a big dip in his lip, always. Never saw him without it. So we're on shore, we just happen to be walking past them as they're like perusing pirated movies, because you can't get anything legal over there. Everything's pirated or knockoff. There's nothing you know actually legitimate.
Speaker 1:That's one of the big draws right.
Speaker 2:To a degree, but I mean you get what you pay for too, like I remember any movies we bought over there were very clearly filmed, you know, with a whole movie camera.
Speaker 2:But he's sitting there and he's perusing the pirated movies. But he's sitting there and he's perusing the pirated movies and one thing that they would do is the kids would like surround you over there and start yelling and trying to sell you candy or little baubles or whatever, and while they were distracting you and surrounding you, they would pickpocket you. That's one of the things they warned us about. So they come up to this gunnery sergeant. He's got a can in his hand and he's spitting it. They all dip in his lip and they're surrounding him and he just leads down to the closest one and he says I'll eat your face and they all start running away. God.
Speaker 1:That was great, you were a Marine right. Yeah, yeah, Lifetime ago yeah, I can see the. Well, I'm sorry, the cover Almost called it out.
Speaker 2:Yeah that's my blues cover. I got that blues cover. My French Forge was in First Division, Kilo 35.
Speaker 1:So, for those of you that don't know, the Marines are the men's department of the Navy.
Speaker 2:That's what they say. I got a full disclosure in case you got any Navy listeners Every Naval person I ever interacted with was fantastic. I was actually on a boat with SEAL Team 6 for about I think. They were only with us for about a month. We were on the USS Juno for the deployment was four months or six months or whatever. They were only with us for about a month but they were the coolest sons of bitches you ever met and they weren't cocky at all Like. It wasn't like in the movies, like as an example on a ship. You know the the hallways are very narrow. You can really only fit one person at a time. So you know we would be traversing the hallways and you'd run across them and they would all kind of just stand to the side and let you go through. They. They weren't. They were the most professional, polite guys I ever met did you ever meet?
Speaker 1:uh, what was that guy's name? Marshinko he wrote all those uh rogue warrior books. I think he was the commander of seal team six for a while oh, I don't, I don't think, so yeah, you probably didn't meet any of those guys if I, if I ever did yeah, because this was back in 2000. I was a naval inspector. Oh really, yeah, I used to check belly buttons for lids.
Speaker 2:That doesn't sound like it pays too well.
Speaker 1:No, but the benefits were great. The benefits were great, volunteer service. That old joke. I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look.
Speaker 2:I play one right now, right here.
Speaker 1:I slept in a Motel 6 or what was it? A Holiday Inn? Whatever it is.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't remember. I remember those series of commercials though.
Speaker 1:Hey, have you ever ridden a Greyhound bus for any length of distance? Yes, once from San angeles that's like a rite of passage. I mean, you got to do that once in your 20s. That's when I did it. Yeah, that's when I did it. I I rode a greyhound from san antonio all the way up to somewhere in massachusetts. It took two and a half days. Oh my God, it was horrible. It was absolutely horrible.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a lot longer than I wrote it, but uh, um yeah, I went from San Diego through LA I forget I was heading North, I think it was heading to LAX and uh, we went through like Compton, I don't know, some, some ghetto, and I was like I can't wait to get the fuck out of here. It was just like you see in the movies Everything was terrible.
Speaker 1:You know, I got shot at in Compton, me and my wife. We had our own business and we had a contract. We were doing some work for Yum Brands and they own like Pepsi and Taco Bell and all this other stuff. We had to go to like 320 something taco bells, real, for real. Uh, within like a three or four month period we were doing some, some stuff for him and so one sure enough man one of them was right in the middle of compton and it was. It was kind of like walking into a saloon in the old west. We walked in and it's all of a sudden everybody's quiet and they all turn and look at you, the music stops and everything. Anyway, right before that we were, we were driving around and and somebody started. They didn't hit us but clearly I mean you could hear him, the whiz, you know, go by, they were shooting over us or something and uh, I did not feel safe. Let me just tell you that, and I was an easy target because I'm pretty white dude. I stood out really easily.
Speaker 2:You know what I was gonna say maybe they weren't even shooting at you, they're not known for their marksmanship, they could just be shooting in that direction they're like.
Speaker 1:They thought I was like a, a big giant white sasquatch. Shoot the monster. You know I'm sick, I'm six, three, three hundred, none of your business pounds and see, I've never had that problem.
Speaker 2:I've always been blended in pretty well. I have the exact opposite problem where people underestimate me because I'm like five, seven and a half, and that half is important um you know, right like 180 pounds that's the thing.
Speaker 1:Like I'm, I'm not. I'm not a bad guy, but I could never be a bad guy because I would be too easy to pick out of a lineup. Yeah, it was like well, it was either him or or hulk hogan and no yeti's back there could be yeti, I don't know jeez, uh.
Speaker 1:So what else is going? That that was all of our letters. By the way, if you've got a, if you've got a first world problem, uh, just uh, send it to me and, tom, you can get a hold of us at info at pwbasscom. We're still setting everything up. This is this is just a fun experiment, and but I'm loving, I'm loving the vibe man, I'm loving the vibe. We'll see. We'll see how this in fact I'm. I think I'm going to upload this to my main channel, where we already have a bunch of subscribers maybe we'll lose them all.
Speaker 2:I don't know. I hope not.
Speaker 1:Maybe this will just blow it out of the water. Geez, you never know. The xm radio would be like no, we want you.
Speaker 2:I'm like the patrick basher no, the one with the marine, the one with the short guy, the one with the short guy, the short angry fellow. We want him.
Speaker 1:The guy that got accosted on Boy Street, or what?
Speaker 2:Boys.
Speaker 1:Town, boys Town that is not a home for wayward young men. Mm-mm, mm-mm.
Speaker 2:There's nothing there that you want, keep running. I don't know. There might be somebody who wants, but I just sprinted through Once I found out where I was. I was, I was deep in enemy territory. I got the fuck out.
Speaker 1:Oh geez, this has been a lot of fun. We're going to have to do this again real soon. Hey, let, if you're listening to this, if you think because, uh, uh, like I said, we're we're feeling a good vibe here and uh, I think we've got a good rapport, but, um, you know, all good things must come to an end, so we're going to have to wrap this one up pretty soon. Tom, you got anything you want to say?
Speaker 2:No, no, it was a lot of fun and I hope I hope it does take off, because I've enjoyed myself.
Speaker 1:So yeah, uh, and again, we're going to send this up to our main channel and we're also going to put it out on a new open Mike Mavericks channel that we're putting together and who knows, who knows what will happen. Yeah, but anyway, hey, we'll catch you next time and until then, keep the blue side up. When I start making love, I don't just make love, I be stroking, that's what I'll be doing. I'll be strong. All right, we'll catch y'all next time, take care I spoke it to the east all right.