Ep. 31. Soft Power series: when your sensitivity is your super power and when it is not.

I want to talk about being sensitive and being powerful. That's for me, in other words, what I call soft power.

We have this perception about if you're a sensitive being, you're some kind of weak, you some kind of have to protect yourself and some sort you are marginalized in our society. In a way, you're not functional, especially in the business world. In a business world, you have to be resilient, you have to be tough. And it's just partly the truth. So, I want to break that stereotype because I found it's just a stereotype. 

In this episode I talk about:

 - 2 types of sensitivity,
- My personal embracing sensitivity story,
- Embodied and disembodied sensitivity,
- How to use senitivity as a strength instead of victimhood,
- The difference between thriving and not thriving sensitive people,
- Why we are afraid and neglect our sensitivity?

Transcript

I want to talk about being sensitive and being powerful. That's for me, in other words, what I call soft power. 

We have this perception about if you're a sensitive being, you're some kind of weak, you some kind of have to protect yourself and some sort you are marginalized in our society. In a way, you're not functional, especially in the business world. In a business world, you have to be resilient, you have to be tough. And it's just partly the truth. So, I want to break that stereotype because I found it's just a stereotype. That is not true. 

I am a very sensitive being. I have extra sensory abilities, which comes in the word itself: extra sensory, extra sensitive. And I am powerful, like atomic explosion sometimes. And I'm not only successful in the way I define success in my business, in my life, but I'm also pioneering and moving and leading something new. In my own pace, in my own way, which takes guts to pioneer something new. It takes resilience. It takes determination. It takes a lot of power to walk the path nobody walked before. And in traditional way, if you're sensitive, you're fragile. You cannot do that. 

I was born into very little, very oppressed, very sad village where everyone was laughing out of my sensitivity. It was a curse that I couldn't get rid of. I was called all kinds of names: "you have to toughen up", "she is the winter garden flower", "she's weird". And I hated that. I did. I just wanted to be normal. I didn't want to be sensitive. And I blocked it and I tried to toughen up. This is where I numbed myself a lot. This is where I literally checked out of my body. 

I remember very little and very vague my childhood memories because I was not in the body. I remember once they got me in the hospital because I collapsed. And what I know now, but I didn't know then and I think nobody knew around me, except the doctor that I was just overstimulated. My nervous system was overstimulated and it got and shut down. I literally went into this freeze collapse. And I remember I hated myself even more because I blamed my sensitivity. Like other people can handle much more. Why can't I be just normal, like other people? I just so want to be normal and belong.

And I remember the doctor looked at me and he said: "Do understand that because of your sensitivity, you express so many talents, you sing, you dance, you paint, you sing. Do you realise that your creativity can come because of your sensitivity. Your care, your heart comes because of your sensitivity. It's your superpower". 

I remember it was the first time someone told me your sensitivity is your gift. And I was so shocked because I couldn't see this point of view at all. I just thought it's not normal. Little did I know that actually other way around is the truth (like everything in this world, almost) - that those people and the way they told me to be not sensitive was the most abnormal thing there is and can be to the human soul.

And I want to clarify, there are two types of sensitivity. 

The first type of being sensitive is when you come from the place of deep unsafety. When your nervous system is in such a hypervigilant state to protect and is very alert where the threat is now. Your sensitivity comes from the deep fear and unsafety, anticipation of the threat. All what it functions on, what it focuses on and uses the energy is how to protect myself.

But there is a very, very different type of sensitivity when it comes from deep embodiment of yourself, when you so connected and really anchored in your body. Because when you're dysregulated, when you're unsafe, usually you check out of your body. And then you are even more hypervigilant because it's even harder to control, because you're not fully tuned in here and now, not fully connected to here and now. But if you are, If you aligned and you anchored in the trust of your capacity to handle life, to handle your emotions, to handle obstacles, and you lean back in a deep safety that yes, it's uncomfortable, but I will be okay. The sensitivity comes from the very different perspective and in a very different sense. Because you are just then very deeply connected and attuned to yourself, to your environment, to the life, to your surrounding, to what is here and now. You're like having extra senses experiencing life. You're so deeply connected. Immersed and connected that the extra sensitivity coming from, from very, very deep connection and very deep presence, very deep awareness.

So do you see the difference between being hypersensitive, hypervigilant from the place of unsafety and extrasensory - when it comes from the deep embodiment and connection and safety. Like you are so safe in yourself, so anchored like a tree in your roots and yourself that no matter the weather around, no matter the storm, the changes, you still stay rooted. You still don't lose the sense of self. You still don't lose that connection. And then there's safety and there's curiosity and then there's just literally openness to have a bigger capacity to be extra sensitive because also more of you is in the body. And when you're in the body, you can coordinate, you can respond, you can assess everything way more accurately because you're here now, because when you're not in the body, who is in your body? 

I see a lot of people struggling with that, like probably the number one thing that I notice in sensitive, big heart people is that they are not in their body. And then it's hard to connect with your emotions, you are anxious, because you cannot really attune to your emotional body. You cannot fully attune to your coordinates of your physical body and assess situation correctly. You cannot really connect with a person or situation in front. You cannot really have clear aligned thoughts because you also become vulnerable from all kinds of thoughts, suggestions and intrusive thoughts and all kind of other energetics coming into your body, the death space, the all kind of interdimensional forces. You'll become like this person who left the car in a supermarket parking spot with a lot of cars left to the supermarket, come back and you cannot find your car. It's that kind of feeling. That's the same as dissociating, leaving the body, and then cannot find your coordinates. So when you are into that hypersensitivity place and disembodiment, then you are weak, then you are vulnerable, then you are fragile. 

But if you are in your body and you're aligned and you're anchored, you are the most powerful you are. Then you can hold a lot without losing, losing your sense of self, losing your truth, losing your own coordinates. This is the only place where you can have very clear sense of boundaries too, because you know where you start and where you end. Your own boundaries, but also other people boundaries. If you don't have sense of boundaries of yourself, about yourself, and who you are, what you stand for, what is your integrity, what are your values, what is okay, what is not, what you need and not, then it's very hard also to sense that for others. And sensitivity is your tool to tune to that. Sensitivity is your antenna to help you navigate and empower you. This is where you become sensitive but powerful. Sensitive and anchored. Sensitive and impactful. This is where you radiate and attract and be magnetic stronger because people can feel and see and sense you more.

So not only you become extrasensory to the world, because more of you is in a body, the world becomes more attuned to you. This is where I've found very different sense of creativity, very different sense of being and living, very different sense of understanding myself and the world and very different access point to nature and the world around me.

If you start to respect your sensitivity as it deserves, it's only then it starts to show its magic and beauty that you didn't realize it has. If you start to respect your sensitivity, honour your sensitivity, others start to respect your sensitivity too. And not only respect, but appreciate. This is where I can access seen and unseen way deeper.

And I met a lot of people who also sensitive and they connect to unseen world. And that's considered extrasensory part. And it's true. But what I noticed, because these people are afraid to be in the body, because then they would have to feel the feels, then they would really have to face the fears, and probably start to feel a lot of pain that they don't feel when they are not in the body. Then you have this sensory overload, you numbed it out, or you couldn't feel it because you were not in the house. Like you were disconnected from these parts of the body. And that's then having extra sensory abilities halfway. It's even a bit dangerous because then if you start to connect just only in visible world more and more, you start to live a little bit in different times and different spaces more than you live here and now on this earth, like here and now in the body in this timeline.

And you may notice those people may access some wisdom and share some wisdom, they seem spiritual, but when you look into the practical human life they have, it's not very thriving. So they often struggle with a part of embodiment and to materialize and manifest and anchor in the practical world in a practical human life. They are more connected to that divinity part of themselves, but not enough to the human part of themselves. And you cannot walk holistic, fulfilling life with one leg. You need to embrace your divinity and your humanness at the same time. This is where sensitivity comes full spectrum in a very different way. This is where the most comprehensive, the most elaborative and holistic approach of your extrasensory nature can really be embodied. This is where you can manifest fast. This is where you can create and build fast, because if you are not in the body, you also cannot fully build material wealth or material things, material success in material forms. And it doesn't have to be only money but anything in this life. 

So you can be sensitive, you can be gentle, and you can be fucking thriving and powerful. But there is a different way of accessing that. Actually, for me, when I embraced my sensitivity, when I embraced my softness, I also unlocked immense power, power with softness, not the power that comes from also dysregulated nervous system where you just fight or flight because of, of the threat, which is also a little bit glorified responses in our society, especially in the business world. But I'm talking about soft power, where you're so aligned and attuned with yourself and the world around you, that you move and lead yourself and everything around you with immense, soft, insane power, insane impact. I think soft power is way more powerful than the harsh and strong and pushing power. The soft power melts the hearts.

That's why for me, embracing your sensitivity and learning to embrace sensitivity instead of something you want to get rid of because it's your weakness, is one of the key elements to start move through your life, build your life, and move through your entrepreneurial journey and build your movement. It's an essential access point.

This is why I never fully resonated with a lot of spiritual practices in a sense of protecting yourself, removing entities from your body, and though I'm not saying they're not helpful, if you've been checking out a lot from your body, you may have attracted a lot of visitors there, so you have to follow your own resonance and your own truth. But I always question those things. You know, I remember once I was sitting with a channeler and listening to her and she's like: "every morning you have to put this white shield around you and protect yourself from the dark forces. world around you". And it's a lot about protection, but it can come to the point of a little bit of victimhood. 

And I remember I asked her: "why do I need to protect myself? Why do you think they are more powerful than me?" And I remember she was so shocked with this question. Because, yeah, who decides? Why do we think those other energies are more powerful than we are? Like, when did we come to that conclusion? Why do we think they have power over us? But it's not even about those energies, other energies. It's about life we get scared. We are afraid to express ourselves. We are afraid to say no. We are afraid of our friend not to like us. We are afraid of our neighbour and be too loud. We are afraid to go in life full in, to try, to fail, to experiment. We fear rejection, disappointment... just because we are afraid of our sensitive heart to be heartbroken.

We're afraid to feel. We're afraid to love. We're afraid to open our heart. We're afraid to risk. We're afraid to be courageous. We're afraid to be naked with our soul. We're afraid of intimacy. We're afraid of our sensitivity. We're afraid to allow ourselves to be sensitive. And in my view, our heart is the strongest organ we have. When you think about, we've been through the hardest, shittiest days, and you're still alive and your heart is still beating. You survived your worst things, your worst feelings, your worst situations. 

The moment I really allowed and embraced my sensitivity, the moment I stopped resisting it. The moment I became the most resilient person I knew being me. The moment I became best friend with my sensitivity, the moment I liberated myself to the extend I didn't know existed because now I'm not afraid to be sensitive. I'm not afraid to be hurt. I'm not afraid to be misunderstood. I'm not afraid to hold uncomfortable and hard feelings in my heart. And this is how all those situations and people lost power over me because I don't need to protect my sensitivity anymore. I know how to hold it. I know how to sit with it. I know how to listen to it and also everything what has power for you not to step into your power, I think just has a little bit too much power. 

So for me, the direction is not how to protect your sensitivity, but how to empower yourself so you can embrace your sensitivity as the safest place as a navigator for your safety. As expander of yourself, your life and your life experience. If you hold your guards up, if you go into that self defence, notice how you tighten up, notice how you contract, you guard up. 

And I'm sharing all of that because I'm inviting you to rewire your relationship with your sensitivity. So your sensitivity is not your weakness. Your sensitivity is your superpower. Because if you don't embrace your sensitivity in the first place, you cannot embrace your creativity. You cannot open your heart fully. You cannot build intimacy fully. You cannot really let life to touch you deeply. I'm inviting you, your sensitivity, be your best friend, to be your ally, and to embrace it not as something you need to get rid of, as a detriment of you to be successful in this world. But actually the heart and the soul empowering you to be successful, to allow, to access more of you, of your potential, what is possible in this life, what is possible in potentiality of human. I honestly believe sensitivity is our superpower. This is where the biggest source of self power is. You don't have to protect your sensitivity, your sensitivity protects you. Your sensitivity is your biggest gift and the portal to embody bigger potential, bigger version of you, more multidimensional version of you, access bigger life. 

So just imagine for a moment, let me ask you, if you were not afraid to be sensitive, who would you be? How would you live? What experiences would you go for? What would you create? What would you be open to? And how would you share your gifts with the world? 

Who would you be? How would you show up in the world? And what would you do if you were not afraid to be sensitive?