Soul Joy: Ditch Burnout and Fall in Love with Life

Trapped in Time: Breaking Free from the Overscheduling Cycle

• Dr. Julie Merriman • Season 2 • Episode 5

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Time management isn't sexy, but it might be the secret key to your happiness and well-being. Drawing from personal experience, I share how I evolved from an exhausted overachiever cramming impossible to-do lists into each day to someone who now guards her mornings and evenings zealously for what truly matters.

My journey reveals the hidden connection between time management and your solar plexus chakra—that energy center governing personal power and self-worth. When this energy is balanced, you can set boundaries, prioritize effectively, and finally kick guilt to the curb when saying "no" to commitments that don't serve you. True time management isn't about doing more; it's about creating peace of mind by aligning your schedule with your authentic priorities.

Remember when you felt you had to prove your worth through constant productivity? I spent decades believing I needed to "catch up" with my peers, overloading my days until I was cranky, exhausted, and still berating myself for not completing everything. It wasn't until my 50s that I recognized how this pattern drained my joy and vitality. Now at 61, my priorities are crystal clear: my husband, my kids, my family, friends, and yes—my self-care.

The Solar Plexus Approach to Time Management I share includes practical techniques like starting each day with intention rather than dread, breaking projects into manageable pieces, delegating effectively, practicing mindfulness while working, and celebrating even small wins. These practices build confidence and maintain inner balance rather than depleting it. Ready to transform your relationship with time? Subscribe to receive the companion PDF with detailed exercises to implement these principles in your life. Your calendar is waiting to be owned like a boss.

Speaker 1:

Hey y'all, I'm Dr Julie Merriman and welcome to Soul Joy. Today is about the very unsexy topic of time management. You see, to get that solar plexus energy balanced, you need to master time management. It's really about boundaries, but tomato, tomato, we're going to explore it. So we're going to explore it. This is necessary for holistic, sustainable self-care, also known as wellness. All right, hoo-hoo, I'm so glad you're here. Welcome, welcome, welcome. And, as always, I appreciate you taking time to hang out with me for just a few minutes of your day.

Speaker 1:

So you know, are you over 60? Am I the only one over 60? Oh, yeah, I am, and it is so weird to find me trapped in an older person's body. When the hell did that happen? But y'all, I'm embracing, I really am. I'm embracing it. My best years are still ahead, I know it. I can still be fashionable, I can still flirt with my hubs and I can still dream sweet dreams.

Speaker 1:

And all this has come up because recently, kelly, my sweet, amazing husband, has been exploring retirement, as his brain tumor has left him somewhat visually impaired and now he's younger than I am, he's just 56, 57 but he is having to face that, the end of this career as a state trooper, which he loved being a state trooper. He was an amazing state trooper, but y'all bad guys aren't going to cooperate with his vision issues. So we are really up against the wall, re-looking at our lives, exploring how we can retool some things, and you know it's it's kind of exciting, um, it does. I mean, we don't get me wrong we completely appreciate where we are in life. I mean, early on we worked our asses off to get to where we're at. So he's got, you know, retirement and things we can look at. But we're at a life stage that got here way too quickly, I'm not gonna lie. I mean yesterday I was just 20 something, the youngest one at work, and now I'm the old lady. But we have each other, we have wonderful kids and it's all good. So you know it's good. So, okay. So Professional Helpers this podcast is dedicated to preventing and overcoming the occupational hazards of this amazing career. We chose looking at burnout, compassion, fatigue and vicarious trauma. So wrap your head around that Everything I talk about on this podcast has to do with how to prevent those constructs. But also, if you aren't in the helping professions, this podcast is for you too. Everything I talk about brings light to beautiful things that go on in our life. So today we're talking about how well.

Speaker 1:

I'm asking you, how do you feel about time management? As I said, it's not a really sexy topic, but it's an important one. It is core to your happiness. I used to way overschedule myself. I think I could do the work of 10 women in one day and I'd be so cranky, so tired at the end of that day and worse y'all, if I didn't get all that stuff I'd scheduled for myself done. I would ridicule myself, I would talk so ugly to myself and it was. It was not productive. Please don't do that.

Speaker 1:

True time management is comprised of knowing yourself. Y'all. It's complete self-awareness. You cannot practice healthy, holistic time management unless you have done the work to be completely self-aware and know yourself. I mean, that's true. You have to know what your energy level is and what you're capable of doing in a day.

Speaker 1:

I used to not be able to say no. That robbed me of my happy place. It caused me so much grief. Time management demands you have the ability to say no. Zero guilt, zero explanation. You say no because it doesn't fit. You have the ability to manage a realistic schedule. You have the ability to manage a realistic schedule. Again, you kick guilt's ass to the curb. There's no place for guilt in time management or in a holistic, sustainable, healthy self-care.

Speaker 1:

You know your life's purpose and schedule that into your calendar. You allow time for play. You allow time for absolutely nothing. You fire the words should, must, have to. Those don't belong in your vocabulary. You accept that it is just fine to accomplish one thing in a day, or maybe some days you accomplish zero. Very cool, you've learned how to prioritize and that's a big word. I mean, oh, that's a big word. There's so much to priority and prioritizing your time and schedule. But I take you back to that self-awareness. When you are completely self-aware it is so much easier to be able to prioritize because you know back to life purpose. Y'all this is all solar plexus work. You know your life purpose, or plural purposes and you are prioritizing your time, your days, towards meeting goals in that purpose y'all. When you have that clear life purpose or purposes, when that is clear, the rest will follow. And again, y'all this is solar plexus chakra balancing work. Lord, have mercy.

Speaker 1:

I remember in my 20s when I felt I had to catch up with the world or with my peer mates, y'all I married early. Do not recommend it. And that person he used to tell me I was too stupid to do anything. I was ugly and stupid, but he really convinced me. I was too stupid to go to college. I went to hair school, which that's a fabulous career and you have to be highly intelligent to do that. I found the courage to go to hair school and by the time I was 22, y'all, I owned my own hair salon. So I don't know why I got this idea in my head. I had to catch up, because I don't know of any other 22, 23 year olds in my peer group at that time that were that owned their own salons.

Speaker 1:

But here and there, I didn't start college until I was about 25. And somehow in my mind's eye I felt I'd missed out. And again I had to play catch up. And it was not true at all, but I started loading up my days in a flipping frenzy to prove I was worthy. Now, as I sit here today. Now I could go deep and I'm not going to waste y'all's time in that, but just you know, at the surface, who the hell was I trying to prove I was worthy to, or what was I worthy of, prove I was worthy to, or what was I worthy of. I think, in looking back, it was a blocked solar plexus draining my self-esteem.

Speaker 1:

But the point I'm trying to make is that this believing I wasn't enough really that was the essence of it began my habit of overscheduling and then being wiped out each day because I was so overscheduled. And who was doing that? Who was responsible? Who owned it? Julie, elizabeth, that's who. I did it to myself, but I would wake up dreading each day because I was so wiped out and so overscheduled. Does that sound familiar to anyone? Can you relate in any way? It took me I'm embarrassed to say until my 50s to really wrap my head around how ridiculous this was, this overscheduling habit, and I'm sure there's dopamine hits that were happening and we could, you know, dissect this all kinds of ways. But it was ridiculous.

Speaker 1:

And I'm going to tell you my calendar looks so different today. I don't schedule things until after 10 am. I mean, I have to do stuff for work, but to schedule a client or something that's not going to happen until after 10. And I quit by 4 pm. I am not giving up my evenings, unless I have to teach class, and that's different. My mornings and evenings are designed to hang out with my beloved. If he needs me for something, you better believe I am there for him. I will move my calendar around, as is needed to be there for Kelly.

Speaker 1:

I have nothing to prove anymore. I live to enjoy my life and, yes, as I said, I have a day job and sometimes I have to put things first because I have a responsibility at work. But for the most part, my beloved is my responsibility and my kids are my responsibility, my family, my friends. But at 61, I'm crystal clear on what my priorities are my hubs, my kids, my family, my friends, my self-care. That's right, ladies and gentlemen, my self-care and you know that order can change depending on needs, but those things are my priority. The days of overscheduling, man, I'm telling you they're done, it's over, let's stick a fork in that it's over, it's done. I look back, truly, y'all. I look back. I'm stunned at the things I managed to get done and how I did them. But I wouldn't even try that stuff today. So, as I say this, I'm going to invite you to consider how about you? Does any of this resonate? Here's my life lesson Time management is meant to bring you peace, p-e-a-c-e of mind.

Speaker 1:

Okay, that's why we bother with time management. It's not to shove and cram as much as you can into a day. It's to look at that calendar, own it like a boss. Babe, boss man. You own that calendar and you only put in there what you want in there. That's time management peace of mind. Okay, subscribe to my email list to get the weekly podcast email where I send you the email out and the bonus PDFs I create to go with the activity I'm about to talk to you about. All you have to do is go to Julie Merriman, wwwjuliemerrimanphdcom. Go down to subscribe to my newsletter and I will hook you up, all right.

Speaker 1:

So the activity today is called Solar Plexus Approach to Time Management. Isn't that crazy. That solar plexus is right there in your upper belly Can help you with so many things. So with this, you're going to focus on building confidence and personal power by setting clear priorities, tackling tasks with focused intention and managing stress to maintain a sense of control over your schedule, which can include techniques, y'all like schedule mindfulness, deep breathing, setting realistic goals. Go back to my stuff. Let's go back to realistic goals that are aligned with your values and that life purpose.

Speaker 1:

The key aspects of solar plexus time management are prioritization you need to make things a priority. Prioritization you need to make things a priority. Clearly identify your most important tasks and focus your energy on completing those first. Mindful decision making Avoid distractions and impulsive choices. You take a moment to check in with your gut. We have brain cells there too, y'all we make, we make things. Our brain cells are in our gut. That gut feeling is a real. It's real, but you check in with your gut before you commit to a task. Self-awareness you recognize your energy levels throughout the day and schedule demanding tasks when you feel most focused and capable. Positive self-talk you use affirmations and encouraging language to boost your confidence and motivation, especially when you're tackling something challenging. And then time blocking that's what I'm doing right now as I make my podcast.

Speaker 1:

You allocate specific time slots for specific tasks to maintain structure and prevent that multitasking, because that's for the birds. One thing at a time. Stress management Again y'all. I have a PDF where I have all this laid out. Stress management techniques you incorporate deep breathing, meditation, short breaks so that you can manage stress and maintain inner balance. Right, easy peasy, but you got to schedule it. Now let's consider how to apply solar plexus time management. Okay, we're applying it. We're creating our time management policy. I've been writing a lot of that Policy for your life.

Speaker 1:

So you start your day with intention. You don't start it with dread or in a frenzy that I've got commitments, I got to do no sirree. You start that day with intention and you begin each morning by setting your clear goals and you visualize your success in achieving them. Sweet soul, you set realistic goals. You break down large projects into smaller, manageable, bite-sized pieces. You delegate effectively Absolutely. That is not being lazy, that is working smart. You delegate effectively Absolutely. That is not being lazy, that is working smart. You delegate effectively. You trust your abilities and you delegate tasks that don't align Also like with my team at work. I delegate stuff so they know they are an important part of my team. I could do it, but why, when it helps them feel like they're part of the team? Delegate, free up your time so you can focus on your priorities and you delegate.

Speaker 1:

You practice that mindfulness, as we mentioned. You pay attention to your thoughts, your emotions, while working to identify and manage distractions and y'all. I think we miss this so much. Please do this for you Celebrate achievements, acknowledge your progress. Hell yes, I don't care how small it is, acknowledge it. Celebrate small wins. That helps you maintain your motivation.

Speaker 1:

Okay, easy, right, I know it's easier said than done, but you can do this for you, and I'd also like to invite you to look at yoga and meditation. That's going to I've mentioned that before this month and in our time together but practice breath of fire, that rapid breathing technique. It can really energize you and focus the mind. Try a bow pose. That back bending pose can open up your solar plexus and let it just drink in vitamin d. Do it outside, let vitamin d just drink in. Or try a boat pose, where you strengthen your core, your core strength, and it also helps enhance your self-confidence.

Speaker 1:

Don't negate yoga. It's so important and I also want you to think about these considerations when in when addressing some imbalances in your solar plexus. If you're experiencing excessive self-doubt or maybe you're a little bit cocky and overconfident, consider practicing to balance your solar plexus energy and that could be that yoga practice that I mentioned. Or, you know, if you're really struggling with significant time management challenges, do what I did Go to your therapist or consult a coach. Get some people in there to help you. You're worth the time, you're worth the effort, and the benefits can be phenomenal. Okay, friends, that's it for today. Subscribe to my podcast, where you listen, leave a review and, until next time, take care of you.