Season 7 Episode 7: The Word on Coaching - Stewardship

With great responsibility comes a great opportunity to be a good steward of your internal and external resources. 

In this episode, we explore the concept of Stewardship with Kelly McElroy.

This episode is engaging and challenging as we consider how we can use stewardship to benefit those who follow us and those we serve.

Our guest shares her vast experience and expertise in being a leader who lets the value of stewardship guide her actions.

Kelly is an essential member of the CreativeMINDS team and has a reputation as a person who gets things done. She is one of the leaders of  CreativeMinds Data. Why You Need an Advertising Agency in Tulsa - creativeMINDS

Stewardship is not just about managing external resources but, also how we steward and manage our internal/personal resources. 

Books Recommended in this episode:

Amazon.com: Fables and the Art of Leadership: Applying the Wisdom of Mister Rogers to the Workplace: 9781349434114: Mitroff, Ian I., Mitroff, Donna: Books

Check out our best-selling book The Word on Coaching.  Buy a copy for yourself and copies to share with others.
Amazon.com: The Word on Coaching: 9781737643807: Neely, Debby, Auger, Joann, Fuselier, Kevin: Books

Check out our  quick guide about powerful questions: "Embrace the Power of Questions!"   A Quick Reference Guide to Getting the Answers You Need.  

Transcript

Kevin 0:03

Hi, everyone. Welcome to the word on coaching podcasts. I'm Kevin and I'm here with Debbie and Joanne. Say hi.

0:12

Hello. Hi everyone.

Kevin 0:15

We are coaches three, three friends with years of leadership and coaching experience who want to share our passion with others. Our podcasts are for leaders, whether you have the formal title or not. We know a lot of you out there are leading without a title. We focus on one word that relates to leadership and coaching. We know leadership can be hard. So we, along with our guests, give you tips, information, hopefully a fresh perspective, and always a lot of support. We got you. Today, we are excited to welcome Kelly McElroy. Let me tell you a little bit about Kelly and how we met. I was facilitating a couple of breakout sessions for a leadership event that Kelly had put together. Thank you for having me. For a local healthcare system. And I had worked with Kelly in getting everything set up. So I knew she was behind the scenes, negotiating things and working with leadership to pull things together. But when I got there and saw really what all Kelly was doing, she was doing everything from A to Z. I saw her working with executives, setting things up, making sure things were going properly. I saw her moving signs and tables, getting people chairs. And the thing that impressed me was she just wasn't telling people what to do. She was actually doing it. And I said, that's what, that's what leadership is. And I really, I was quite impressed with her that she has that range to go from, the top of the house to any other place to be able to get things done. That's how I met Kelly. And it was definitely an impactful encounter for me. Kelly, I'll let you tell our listeners a little bit about yourself.

Kelly 1:59

Well, thank you, Kevin. As he mentioned, my name is Kelly. I live in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and I'm very excited to be asked to participate in this podcast. This is a topic that I really enjoy discussing, but never really had the opportunity to sit down and network and bond over it. And I like, I like the approach that you guys are taking to this. So kudos, kudos to you guys. I have been pretty much my own boss for several years. So what I learned about leadership and coaching has been through a long, long line of mentors my entire life from basketball coaches back in my youth from fourth grade on and through college and and so forth. I love working and I love people and I love I love seeing people come together for a common goal. So I think that's, that's some of the things about me. I'm Cherokee. I love to travel, art, culture, and I really enjoy going places where people don't speak English.

Kevin 2:54

Interesting. Interesting. For today's episode, the word is stewardship. Kelly, can you share a little bit with us why you chose the word stewardship?

Kelly 3:07

Well, I realize it's not a common word that a lot of people talk about a lot. And when I've mentioned that word to people, they're kind of like, What? What does that mean? And this word kind of came to the top of my list and to the front lobe of my brain in working with one of my top clients the Chickasaw Nation of Oklahoma. They have obviously like most organizations, a mission and vision and core values, and they have 10 core values. And in working with the Chickasaw Nation and working with their, what they call their governor they don't call him a chief, he's a governor, And just watching him and how he maneuvers around people and leads meetings I really began to admire how he used the word stewardship. And I thought, that's a really important word when you're talking about leading people. And so when I really started diving into what, what they, how they define stewardship, I thought, there's a bigger message here. And they define stewardship as using the resources you have been given responsibly. Being responsible for the resources, and that could be anything from financial to capital labor, human capital, environmental, you know, being a steward of what you've been given, I think, is a responsibility that we have within ourselves for the benefit of others. And a lot of people don't realize the levels of stewardship they have within them from giving to all sorts of levels. But I think if we recognize the gifts that we have been given as a resource for the benefit of others It's, it can be a very valuable and an impactful tool among those, among those in your circle. And after being around the governor and, and being so deeply embedded in, in the culture of the Chickasaw nation, as I am, I've just been drawn to that word from a leadership perspective. I think it's a big word with a lot of responsibility. And as you know, when you have responsibilities, you must be responsible. So that's, That's how that word came to be. That's a little more of the top of my brain here lately.

Debby 5:13

Thanks Kelly. I love, I love that. And so you've given us a little glimpse into the definition of stewardship. Can you tell us, like, why should people pay attention to this word? Why, why is it so important for leaders?

Kelly 5:27

I think, I think being a steward of leadership to me means that as a leader I need to use my gifts I've been given. The resources that are available to me are the ones that I have innately in me for the benefit of others. It kind of, stewardship and leadership in my mind kind of go hand in hand because for those who are in my care my goal is to be a good steward that provides empowerment and unification on purpose. You have to empower the people that are around you. You have to unify them towards that common goal on purpose without them realizing that and a lot of people that's kind of a difficult thing to do. But if you can rely on those resources that are within yourself or with them and harness that power. I think it's very powerful to see what you can move. Because. Good management of people is all about resources. And so you've got to learn how to manage those and collect them and keep them intact to be able to continue to move, you know, move the ship forward. You know, stewardship is about being accountable and making decisions that prioritize sustainability and make a positive impact over the long term and being a good leadership steward means.The impact is for the long term. And not the short term gain.

6:41

That's so interesting. Cause you know, I, I feel like I've heard that message in the last couple of weeks. with leaders that I work with of that, you know, you can solve a short term problem, right? With short term solution. But if you lose sight of your long term focus, then that's going to be a problem, right? So I love that you're, that you're bringing that up. And I also love the The phrase on purpose, because I feel like sometimes leaders are kind of accidentally leading like they're just kind of going with the flow and figuring things out. But when we can set some intention or do things on purpose, the power behind that is, I mean, I can hear it even when you talk about it.

Kelly 7:21

Well, and I think it's sometimes difficult because everybody is so busy today, today on the task that is right in front of them to get that done, knowing there's other things behind them in the peripheral that are getting lists, you know, getting off the list or becoming less important, but they're still critical towards where the end game is. And as leaders, you've got to keep that focus on that, that end game. Because why are you doing it? What's the purpose and what's the goal? So to be a good steward of what that goal is and to keep pushing forward to have, somebody has to have that vision to do that and to do that on purpose, to empower them on purpose, I think is critical to keeping everybody in their lane marching in the same direction.

Kevin 8:04

And I love that your definition of stewardship and leadership includes the resources that lie within us, right? A lot of times we think about how do we Steward over the things that are outside of us, the money, the buildings, the what, all the different things. But actually there's a stewardship about the resources that come from within us. And so I thought that's very interesting the way you, the way you put that. So thanks for sharing that.

JoAnn 8:30

Yeah, I agree. I thought, you know, the first thing that came to my mind is, When you mentioned the internal resources is that oftentimes our, our employees, those who report to us are, we should have good stewardship over them, right? So, I, I, I love this concept. Knowing leaders, we've all worked with leaders. Why do you think leaders would find it difficult to, practice stewardship or even maybe resistance? To the concept of stewardship

Kelly 9:06

that sometimes resistance comes when they don't feel like they agree with how those resources are being managed. You work with a lot of employees who don't have that longterm vision and they can't see the forest for the trees. And I think that falls back to that in a internal gift that leaders. I've been blessed with. So trying to you again, educate and and let them understand there's a bigger picture here is very difficult. Sometimes it's very frustrating. You know, we've all we've all been there. And so I think that educating people on big picture is, you know, stewardship is just like leadership, putting that priority on that long term and today's world being sustainable is exhausting. It's, it's the buzzword. It's exhausting. It's like, really, you know, we're all moving as fast as we can with what we have to work with. And now you're wanting me to stretch it a little further or be greener in my thinking or use it again. And it's, it's, it's, it's exhausting and it gets, it's tiresome. So one of those resources is bringing new things to the top. To, to find that impact that you, that you need, because it's hard to focus on that longterm when we're all geared towards immediate satisfaction. And I think when stewardship is practiced, you know, leaderships are tasked with keeping all the plates spinning. I mean, and a lot of people don't recognize that, but we are, we have to keep all the plates spinning, but if you don't have the resources to keep the plates spinning and, and you're, and you're about to make difficult decisions. You're, you're kind of stuck. So managing those resources makes leadership easier. You don't manage your resources or stewardship when difficult decisions come up because it's good leaders are put in a position to step up or step aside. And so making sure that you're the person that's going to keep the plate spinning, you've got to keep doing it or you're going to have to step aside. And then all the work has been for naught.

11:06

Yeah. And I feel like some of those resources to the internal resources are time and energy. And like you were saying, leaders are moving at such a fast pace all the time, they're exhausted, you know, they're pushed to get results, that they don't always slow down enough to reflect or innovate or, think about the future and, and they need to do that. That needs to be part of the process. Their practice as well.

Kevin 11:33

I was thinking about, I have a book on my shelf, it's called Essentialism. By Greg McCowan. And he talks about you are the asset. And he talks about you being the asset. Meaning that you have to, I guess, have good stewardship over yourself. Or all the things that you want to do won't work. Done because you won't be there to do that.

Kelly 11:58

And that is so hard because I think, you know, burnout's another, another reality., and I think that is exactly right, Kevin, if you're not a steward of your own resources to keep the momentum and the energy, you can't do there for others. and that does nobody any good. I mean, we all, we all know that.

Kevin 12:19

That's a

Kelly 12:19

very good point.

Kevin 12:20

As I was thinking about stewardship, we chose this word. One of the things I wanted to know is how have you demonstrated, used it, experienced stewardship in your career? What made you, start to take some ownership of this concept?

Kelly 12:36

I'm an event producer by trade. I actually have a, a degree in event production and I'm a, I'm a certified meeting professional. There's a such thing as a CMP. I'm used to communicating with. The person sweeping the broom in the hall to get the hotel ready to the CEO to make sure that he's getting on stage and is buttoned up and, and ready to go. And so having that bandwidth of those, of, of those resources to understand the communication styles that I have to inflect based on who my audience is or who I'm talking to, you know,, it's a skill that you, need to have and, I don't do as many events as I, as I used to do. I'm used to big worldwide trade shows, conventions, conferences, those sorts of things. I don't do them like I, like I used to do back in the day. My, when I was younger, but when COVID reared its head I was thrown back into the fire of coordinating at a, at a very, very frantic high level. And I am not a medical professional, but when COVID hit the Chickasaw Nation Department of Health, they were very worried about keeping people well and keeping people safe, but they couldn't open the doors to their hospital and they couldn't, they didn't know what to do. So I had to jump in and understand you need some tents. This the logistics of how this is going to work. So managing their manpower to train nurses how to line up cars for drive thru parking, how to communicate with their hospital employees that I need the generator here to power the lights so you can be on 24 7, you know, communicating with a person in a completely different division on how many chairs and tables we needed to take temperatures. It was just a completely, it was a triage situation to where I had the resources in my, not only my hip pocket from my previous experiences, but I had the resources to know who to call to help medical professionals be able to stand up to serve others. Because that was their role. They didn't need to be worried about the tense and the power and the drive through and the cones and the signage to direct people in multiple languages who were coming through with multiple learning styles on not being able to read, can read, can't read. Hispanic, English, you know, there was, it was just a dichotomy of, of a lot of things happening at a time when there was no budget, you didn't, nobody budgeted for COVID, you know? And so sitting down and having very quick conversations in the parking lot, six feet apart with masks on to understand how, how much is this going to cost to Handle a very critical situation for people who we were relying on was a, an experience I'll ever, I'll never forget. And, but I think if I didn't have that ability to, for the communication styles, understand the end goal of what, what was happening and understand the big picture, we're not just trying to get somebody a shot. We are trying to help the masses. You know, in a very. easy to understand way when there was no training for this. There was no training manual how we were going to do this. Was a use of resources and labor level, a budget level. It was all the things. So I think we all have shared stories we can share about covert. But that was one thing I sure as heck didn't see coming back into my my mirror to use those skills in a very rural for rural environments, very rural communities that we were able to stand up. and then decided to open up free shops to the entire state of Oklahoma. Anybody that wanted to make it to any of those four locations anywhere within the state could come and get free resources. But we were ready. I didn't know that was coming. But we were, we were ready for it when it, when it happened.

kelly (2) 16:27

Wow. Very impressive. Just wow.

JoAnn 16:30

Yeah. You know, Yeah. Something that kept running through my mind, Kelly was stewardship is not just about managing, but sharing as well. Right. When you're, when sometimes we think it's all about us and our organization, our, our needs, our resources. But it really impressed me that, that not only did you have to get this going and use all the resources at your hand and you managed them well, but then you were willing to extend that beyond just your, your team, what you were responsible for. And I thought, I first was thinking, how does that fit with stewardship? But it fits perfectly because stewardship is also the ability to recognize when someone needs help and you have a resource and you're willing to share it, even though they're outside of whatever we call their realm of authority. So yeah, very impressive.

Kelly 17:29

Well, thank you being being an event producer by trade. It kind of goes hand in hand because I tell people, you know, not only running organizations, but are similar to running, running events, you know, long term goals, short term gain, all the things. But the real bottom line in my in my gut has always been end user experience. You have to approach whatever you are trying to solve, whatever organization you're trying to lead, to the person who's going to experience what you're working on. And it's a lot of hard work and you have to roll up your sleeves to make it done. But if that's not you, it's okay. Because the rest of us are crazy around here to like it to serve others and to stand against the wall and not receive the recognition that we deserve because seeing the smile on somebody's face that they're enjoying what just happened or they have the aha moment that they just got it. It's worth it's what you're working for. So to see those people get their shot to see I, there was a tent it was a big white, scary, awful tent. And these parents were having to drive their kids through a tent to get a shot or to get a checkup because they couldn't go into the hospital any longer to get a checkup. And so they called me, I said, Kelly, this, this tent is white and these parents are driving through in their cars and it's just terrible. What can you do? So I measured the tent and I came in and I. Made these massive banners, massive banners, like 40 feet tall by 60 feet long that were forest scenes with birds and foxes and these weird little caricatures and owls and all these animals and trees and shrubs and little bodies of water, fountains. And so we are hanging these banners inside this tent for these parents to drive their sick kids through. And kids are crying and These doctors that are wearing these huge masks and they're dressed in these yellow. It's over their outfits and they don't even look approachable. They look scary too, because we're all dealing with a situation we don't know. So while we're hanging these banners, we don't even have them up yet. And we're hanging twinkle lights from the ceilings of the tent. I turn and look at a doctor who is trying to stick a tongue depressor down a kid's throat through the window of the car. Mom is in the car, kids in the back seat. Doctor is talking to this kid to the back seat and the kid and the doctor says, Hey, Julie, can you count how many birds are in the tree behind me? And I thought I was just trying to make this not scary. They're using this as a tool for distraction and engagement and using the resources that they have that I brought to the table to make their job easier. It was a, it was a fan that, and that's when I, there's always that moment when you realize this is why I'm doing what I'm doing. And that was it.

Kevin 20:20

That's incredible. I mean, just the impact, you know, sometimes we talk about what's the impact. That's the impact of stewardship, that's the impact of leadership is going above and above and beyond. And then the trickle down effect of all the things that you do play out and things like that, where the doctor is using it as a, as a way to provide care to, to a child. I mean, that's next. That's next level right there.

20:48

So I'm guessing at this point, Kelly, our audience is like, I'm in on this stewardship thing, right? I think we've, I think we're probably getting the buy in now. What advice or what are some things that you could help a leader to understand how they Can get that mindset or that heart or for stewardship?

Kelly 21:11

You know, that's a, that's a really difficult question. And I think being a leader, it's exhausting. I think, I think it's exhausting. And I think the thing that I have found to kind of recharge my batteries is I always need a different perspective because I feel like I kind of do the same thing all the time and I need a fresh perspective at times so mentors are very valuable to me. And I have I had a mentor. She recently passed away. I have her picture over here with her family, but I had this mentor named Sandy Brown. And I hired her as an administrative assistant years ago, but she was somebody who would send me a daily email or a daily text and let me know that she was cheering me on and she's somebody I didn't talk to every day. But I think equipping myself with people in my circle that. Selfishly, I've kind of apparently made an impact on their lives at some in some way to have them constantly or come back to me or send me, you know, like Sandy to send me these daily reminders that you're doing a good job when I don't see them that often. Just kind of gives me that little boost that I need to realize. You're doing okay, Kelly. Just, just keep going. Keep going and surround yourself with mentors and people who can kind of be your own little cheering section. I'm not that person that really needs that, but sometimes I kind of think I do. It's weird to admit that, but to surround yourself with people that can They don't need a job. They don't, they don't want anything from you. They just want to say, Hey, I'm thinking about you. Here's a little prayer or, or here's a, here's a funny note. You came across my mind today. Is something that makes me feel like, okay, I think, I think I'm going to make it. I think I'm going to, I'm going to be okay. So that's a hard question. I don't really know. You need just kind of keep going. Sometimes you forget to take care of yourself. Like Kevin said,

23:16

I think that's a great answer, right? We all need that encouragement. And I think your answer also reminds us. To make sure that when we get that nudge to reach out to someone we don't ignore it, you know that we we send that text to say I'm cheering for you

Kelly 23:31

on I'm kind of conscious that today today when I was driving to work. I was thinking about a couple of administrative assistance of some leaders that I work with. I hadn't heard from in a while. And I just sent him a text today. I said, Hey, beautiful. I hope you're doing well. And I'm thinking about you because that's something that Sandy always did for me. And they both reached back out to me later this afternoon and said, Hey, it's great to hear from you. And, you know, and, and thanks. You know, and it wasn't like a sales thing, or it was just like, you've come across my mind today. I want you to know you're awesome and you're doing, and I hope you're doing well. So I think just those little snippets of out of the blue moments make a difference. It'd make a difference in my day. So hopefully they make a difference in somebody else's as well.

JoAnn 24:11

I would guarantee you almost that they do, you know, and when you made the statement, like, I don't need that. I shouldn't need that. We all do. We all seek connection. And Your story of your administrative assistant, you know, sometimes the teacher gets sent a teacher, right? And it sounds like that's what happened in your case. And that's, that's a beautiful story of, how we grow is allowing other people that we may look like we should be taken care of or should be reporting to us or whatever, but they're actually teaching. They're there to teach us. So, and you're open to that. So, you know, how would you support a leader who's saying, I do want to have more stewardship and understanding at a deeper level, but what advice would you give them as to what skill or what should they concentrate on or focus on at the beginning, you think, if they're just starting this process?

Kelly 25:15

I think there's two things. And the first thing is being adaptable. I think adaptability is key because change is constant. And there's things in your peripheral and right, and right in front of you or, or along the path that are going to happen. And if you're not able to, to be adaptable to shifting those resources or shifting how, you know, you're going to have to recraft your plan to get to where you're going. If you don't practice adaptability and being open to new ideas and new thoughts and new ways of doing things from those that are in your care it's going to be a harder road. For you. I believe, I believe. And you know, focusing on the resources that allows you to stay in your lane. I'm constantly stepping out. That's a big slogan with me. Do I, and I asked people in my care, do I need to stay in my lane? Do you have this? Or do I need to jump back out, you know, jump out? They're like, I got it. Come back if you don't like what you see and I'm like, all right, all right, you, you do you. I'm not quite sure about it, but let's try it. Let's try it because that allows me if they want to take ownership in that and be adaptable to do a new way of doing it, even though it wasn't really my idea. I think that's building character and building strength and those people that are with you to allow you to adapt and move to a different direction or focus on something else. And the second thing I think is is goal management. It's, it's easier said than done, but are harder said, you know, it's really difficult, but keeping that eye on the prize goal management is, is a real, I try to work on that every day. It's very difficult because there's so many little things that crop up, but I on the prize is, is a common phrase. I, I say a lot. And I think I say it out loud just to remind myself. This stuff around the surface is it's not going to matter, but it's going to make a difference later.

Kevin 27:01

Absolutely. I think that's a very good advice. As you can tell, as you've been listening that Kelly is one of those next level leaders. And as I was interacting with her at this leadership conference that I spoke about where I first met her I was starting to become a fan. And then she really got me at the end when I told her, I said, I see you doing the things that you're doing when I see you from going from A to Z kind of checking you out and watching the things that you're, you're doing. And I said, that's, it's very impressive. And she really got me when she looked at me and said. Kevin, why are you buttering me up? What do you want? And I said, yeah, I do want something. I want you to be on our podcast. And this is, and this is why. I knew she is the guest that we need to have on our podcast. I appreciate you volunteering to be on our podcast. But before we let you go, we have three questions that we asked all of our guests. The first one is, what is a book that you believe a leader coach should read?

Kelly 28:08

I was excited you asked me this question, Kevin, because I don't, when I tell people about this book, they look at me like, and you maybe you've had this answer before, but I buy this book several times a year and I give them out. And it's the fables and art of leadership. Applying the wisdom of Mr. Rogers to the workplace.

Kevin 28:29

All right. I think this may be the first time we've gotten that one. So we'll have to check it out. Mr. Rogers,

Kelly 28:36

he was a great guy. You know, he's got simple wisdom with a kid's mindset that the concepts are easy to grasp. But if you apply some of Mr. Rogers wisdom to leadership, it can change. It's great. It's gold. It's a good book.

Kevin 28:51

I'll have to pick up a copy. The next question is, What is a question in the course of your career that you've been asked that made you pause, think deeper, or think differently?

Kelly 29:06

When are you going to retire? I think they ask me that because I make them tired. They want to know. Keep going, Kelly.

JoAnn 29:18

Keep going.

Kelly 29:19

I know, and I'm like, you know, I'm, I'm, I'm 58. I'm gonna be, you know, and I'm like, well, I've never really thought about it before, but are you telling me that I should? And they're like, you're wearing us out. And I'm like, well, I'm tired too. Oh, I know that's probably not the answer you were thinking, but I'm like, hell if I know. So it's making me think a little deep. Well, maybe I should, these people are, maybe I do need to go home. Maybe I do need to go to the back porch and drink more coffee. I don't know.

Kevin 29:50

That question can have multiple meanings. When will you

Kelly 29:54

retire? Well, I'm, I'm ready. Can you work a little harder so I can have some more

Kevin 30:00

We could use that in one of our coaching exercises. Just all the different inflections. When are you retiring? When are you retiring? When are you gonna retire? There's a lot of different inflections in that. So the last, I know

kelly (2) 30:17

that, I know that probably wasn't the answer you were looking for, but it really has made me think a little bit, I

Kevin 30:25

knew this was going to happen, but it's good because that's why we, that's why we have our podcasts because we enjoy our guests. So the last one is what is your word on coaching

kelly (2) 30:39

selflessness?

Kevin 30:42

Selflessness. Okay. Well, thank you for all of your answers this evening. Thank you for being an engaging guest. I've enjoyed getting a chance to talk to you a little bit more beyond the 22 minutes we got to spend together at the conference, but it was an impactful 22 minutes.

kelly (2) 31:01

Apparently.

Kevin 31:04

So it's been a pleasure, Kelly, Joanne and Debbie. We want to thank our audience for, for listening. We appreciate you checking out the podcast, not just this episode, but there's more episodes out there. So check them out. We would encourage you to get connected with us on Facebook. We have a Facebook page and we also have books for sale on amazon. com. So go out, type in the word on coaching and our philosophy is. Buy a book for yourself because you need it and then buy another book for a friend because maybe they need it also. So we appreciate you listening and until next time, that is the word on coaching.