101: How Does One Heal From Trauma With Insights From The Bowling

When the fabric of our lives is torn by trauma, the journey toward mending can be as daunting as it is necessary. Sarah Bowling and Isabell Bowling, a mother-daughter team and authors of "Road to Wholeness Healing from Trauma," join me to unravel the tangled threads of pain and recovery. Together, we delve into the heart of trauma, sharing personal anecdotes and generational wisdom that shed light on the path to healing. We discuss the importance of acknowledging and confronting our deepest wounds, offering solace to others, and the transformative power of faith in the process. The conversation turns to practical, faith-infused strategies for those seeking to lay their burdens at the feet of Jesus and thereby hanging out with Him for awhile.

Resources Mentioned on the Episode and suggested reading & social media handles:

• Road To Wholeness Healing From Trauma by Sarah Bowling and Isabell Bowling
• Psalm 51
• Lamentation 3
• Sarahbowling.org
• @your.pal.isabell
• @sarah_genuinelove
• Lyvitabrooks.com/contact

Calls to Action:

·        Sign up for The Me Project Academy Newsletter for resources on decluttering your mind in order to grow in Christ, academy news and new releases of the podcast. 

·        Website: www.hangingoutwithjesuspodcast.com

·       support@themeprojectacademy.com (for comments)

·        YouTube Channel: Hanging Out With Jesus Podcast

Thanks for listening. I pray this episode was a blessing to you. Leave a comment or rate this episode . Then pass it on. Share this link: https://lyvitabrooks.com/

Transcript

Lyvita: 0:01

Trauma. Saints, what goes through your mind when you hear the word trauma? Is it a memory? Is it something that brings up a feeling? Or both? Is it an emotion or an event that you try to suppress? You don't really want to remember it, but when you hear the word trauma, it brings something to mind that you just don't want to deal with. Or have you dealt with it? Or have you dealt with it? Do you feel safer now that you have dealt with it? Do you feel any pain when you hear this word? Or nothing at all? Let's talk about that in this episode. But more than what it is, how does it impact our lives? How do we heal from it and how can we help others who are going through a traumatic situation?

Lyvita: 1:14

I brought my friend Sarah Bowling on this episode to talk about trauma. Come to find out. She and her daughter wrote a book on the topic of healing from trauma. It's called now get this, saints, "Road to Wholeness Healing from Trauma. Yeah, I got to say that again Road to Wholeness Healing from Trauma. And guess what? She co-authored this with her daughter, isabel, who is also on this episode. Well, saints, you're going to have to perk up your ears because we have a lot to share. And just in case I'm just warning you, the birds are talking loudly over here and I'm in my third room trying to get away from the birds, the air conditioner and the refrigerator, so if you hear the birds, just think of it as nice music. Have y'all ever been in that kind of situation? 100%.

Isabell: 2:21

Yeah.

Lyvita: 2:25

Now on to the intro. Welcome to Hanging Out with Jesus podcast, the podcast that equips and encourage you to spend time with God in order to decolor your self-talk intentionally and become more productive, by providing you interviews, information, inspiration and implementation so you can go and do what God's called you to do. Hey, thanks, saints. Thanks for listening and welcome. I'm LaVita author, Bible teacher and speaker on a mission with a purpose to help you break free from the things that distract us from doing what God's designed us to do, and one of those things is not allowing ourselves to heal after experiencing something that was devastating. This is episode 101. I pray this episode awakens your senses to the truth of who you are and whom you belong to, so you can let go of the lies and embrace doing what you are called to do. Let's get started. So welcome, ladies.

Isabell: 3:56

We're so excited to be here.

Lyvita: 4:04

Oh, I am excited to have you Everyone. This is Sarah and Isabel Poling, mother and daughter. Team co-authors.

Isabell: 4:09

I'm so excited, mama it's great, yeah, so thanks.

Lyvita: 4:14

Before we get started, I want to give you some background information into who's a part of this episode. Nowah has been on the podcast three other times, wow I know right, they keep coming back.

Sarah: 4:30

It must be like traumatic. It's like it's a trauma run.

Lyvita: 4:35

Oh my goodness so she's been on episode 34, 27 and 19 and if you want to know more about her and her amazing books that actually spark titles for the episode, remember the one that's called Can you have a Real Conversation with God? Yeah, yeah, saints, I suggest you take some time checking out episodes 34, 27, and 19. Now for those new to the podcast. Sarah Bowling is the co-host of the TV program Today with Marilyn and Sarah. That's also a mother and daughter show. She's the founder of Saving Moses, which is a global humanitarian organization for saving babies under five. She's a wife, her and her husband Reese. They have three children. She's a pastor's wife and a lead pastor of Encounter Church in Denver, colorado. Sarah, I feel blessed to have you back on the show. It's all good.

Sarah: 5:49

It's all good, so glad to be here.

Lyvita: 5:52

Yeah, cause it just seems like you know, cause in January I pray and ask the Lord what the topics are. And then it was like okay, god, I don't have anyone for this. I need, I need a little help with this trauma thing. And it was like you know what, you know how I do. So I just waited out and here comes tanya saying well, sarah said and here's the book. I said what that's?

Sarah: 6:21

okay yes. Yes.

Lyvita: 6:26

It was perfect. But now, isabel, can you tell us a little bit about you, because you're new to us.

Isabell: 6:37

Yes, Hi, I'm Isabel. I am 23. This is my very first book that I've ever written and I am so honored that my mom would give me a chance to get to write it with her. I just graduated college last year and I went on staff at Maryland and Sarah Ministries shortly after and I loved the last year getting to grow in a variety of skills, learning a lot from my mom, a lot from my grandmother. I live here in Denver, Colorado. I go to church at Encounter Church and I love it. I have a real heart for the body of Christ and building up his bride and just honoring God's people and honoring God's heart towards his people.

Lyvita: 7:20

Oh, wow, you have been doing a lot. I know that that's that's that's gotta be. That's gotta be really interesting to be in that spot where you can see two generations living for Christ and the impact that is actually having on you. You know, as you grow and become whom you're supposed to be in Christ Jesus and then Sarah, when I think about you, we're kind of like in that other, we're the ones in the middle. We have someone pouring into us as we're pouring into others. So what is that like? Being in the middle there, you know, being able to reap the benefits and receive that from those who've gone before us and then trying to pour out into our legacies those that are coming up behind us.

Sarah: 8:24

I think you know, just thinking in terms of a bridge, but I think too, you know, and one of the things I like about you, levita, is that you're keen on people being true to the design that God has put in each of us, and I think that's very, very essential, not just for me, but also for Isabel and true for my mom and we're. You know we're not called to be. God didn't design us to be echoes or repeats. We have one. That's enough, and let's have one one, isabel, which is fantastic.

Sarah: 9:02

We don't need multiple Isabells. We don't need multiple Sarahs. We certainly don't need multiple Marilyns. We don't need multiple Sarahs. We certainly don't need multiple Maryland's. We don't need multiple Lyvita's. We don't need multiple ands or multiple Andrews, who are helping here with the tech support. We just need each of us to be our best self.

Sarah: 9:18

So, whatever that is, our best self is the design that God put in us and really, really pushing into that and letting God continue to sculpt right. I mean, if you look at Michelangelo and how he sculpted out of, you know, marble and everything, I like those ones that are half shaped right, that are still stuck in the block, and it's like and he said this he said whenever I sculpt, I see what's inside the block and so then I just chisel away to set that, that image, free, and some of those sculptures that he's done, he didn't finish, so they're like still stuck in the block, and I think that's kind of what God does with us. You know like keeps hewing, keeps shaping, keeps sanding, you know chiseling off and you, you know like molding, and that's not quite right. Let's, let's do this.

Lyvita: 10:08

So I think it's good, I think it's really good and I like how you, how you that was a good description here, because that reminds me of I read somewhere about a tree, because our whole topic today is about healing from trauma. But I read somewhere where a tree grows, continues to grow even though it has a spot on it that has been through some trauma, has been through a lot. It's like it has something encased around that area that is holding the part that has been traumatized, so that the rest of the tree can grow. And that's like what you say this painter, the sculptor. He saw something and he brought out using trauma, because that's sculpting. I mean, you got to cut some stuff away, right, so that that image that he saw could come to life.

Lyvita: 11:15

And when I think about people going through a traumatic situation, that's a part of crawling situation, that's a part of growing. It may feel like death, you know. It may feel horrible, it may hurt, it may be painful, but that's a part of growing as well. So let's talk a little bit about trauma. What is that? How does it show up in our lives, how does it feel? Because I know in the book you give some great descriptions and I was saying, oh yeah, I did feel like that. Oh yeah, so give us all an understanding of what trauma is, so we can all be on the same page.

Isabell: 12:10

Yeah, so trauma is something that happens to you, that permanently affects your brain. We talk in the book there's three different types of trauma. There's physical trauma, where your body has been assaulted, like something happens to, where it lingers. There's sexual trauma, and then we also talk about abandonment, and so these are all like horrific events, something that harms you but that leaves scars. And then the result of trauma is like trauma responses, and so there are parts of your brain that are rewired to where, when you face something that has to do with the trauma you experienced, you have the threefold response fight, flight or freeze. And so this is trauma. It's a wound that happens, that leaves scars in your brain that you know you really need to heal from. And I think everybody experiences trauma and I.

Isabell: 13:08

We just don't have the capacity or to recognize that a lot of our responses to tricky situations are a result of trauma couldn't have said it so so are there like different levels yeah, we think of like trauma, like in terms of ptsd, um, and so people who have experienced something drastic and like forever, life-changing going to war, um, sexual assault, all these things and those are very traumatic situations, um. But there are also things like when, like you're a baby, let's say, and you're the youngest in a family and you feel like you never received attention from your parents, or like mom shares this story in the book how she was left at school. Um, oh, yeah, the bus stop. Yeah, somebody didn't collect me at the bus stop.

Isabell: 14:20

A car accident and I was the passenger and it was a pretty. It wasn't a terrible accident. But for like a solid three months afterwards, whenever I was a passenger in a car, I would get all anxious and jittery and I was like, why am I anxious? Like I trust that my brother would drive me around, and I would like be like, did you check your blind spots? And he was like, what is wrong with you? And then I realized, oh, I was in this car accident and now my brain is freaking out because it thinks that I'm going to get in one again, and so just recognizing this is a trauma response. This is irrational. I need to get healing from this.

Lyvita: 14:57

And you know, and that's tricky, but yeah, now I, yeah, it's your brain, it it triggers your brain. It triggers your brain. So you know what On page that reminds me? On page I believe it's 39. Can I read a sentence on your book y'all Definitely? It says the problem with trauma is that it is an echo of past pain that can influence and even control the present. So can y'all speak a little bit on that? Because when I think about it, even if you suppress trauma, it's still going to impact you, right.

Sarah: 15:42

Yeah, right, yeah. And I think, um, Isabell gave a great example. Um, when I, when I got left, somebody accidentally didn't collect me when I was in kindergarten from the bus stop, but I think too, and the great example with the car wreck, um, I remember I was five years old one time and put a trampoline and I did a back flip off of it and landed on my head and they told me like I went unconscious and my nose started bleeding. I guess that's some kind of brain injury maybe, but I have this like instinctual anything I try to do backwards is a real problem, like it's just. I have this like instinctual, visceral. You know that I don't, I won't, you know, and it's, that's some of that, that instinct that controls my present, and so, but you know, like that's, in the grand scheme of things, doing things backwards isn't a key requirement in my life. So I'm okay with that.

Isabell: 16:44

Yeah, and another example is like, let's say you had a really negative experience with, like female friends when you were growing up or you were bullied as a child. You might have a difficult time making friends and trusting people going into adulthood. So if you are experiencing trauma in your childhood you and you never got healing from it and you repressed it, like you said, that trauma can start to control you and you have a difficult time trusting people and even it can affect your relationship with the Lord if we don't get a hold of it and really seek out healing and you make a good point there.

Lyvita: 17:18

How does it impact? I mean, so let's say you've been through rape and you're coming out of this. How might it impact your relationship with the Lord? Or you've been bullied, and how does trauma impact that relationship with the Lord? Or should I say what is it that we need to do to keep us from allowing trauma to overtake us?

Sarah: 17:55

Well, I think one of the things I think from the first is to be honest, to be truthful and to recognize. I mean, if you're not honest and you're not truthful, then you're kind of going to get stuck in it and you're going to be trapped. And so I think, ground zero you have, because, at the very fundamental, how we navigate people even it's important, no doubt, but how we navigate with God is even more essential. Right so? And I think that honesty with God I think someone who has been a victim of rape, you know, and probably could be angry with God you know why did, why did you let this happen? How come you didn't protect me? And I think it's good to be honest with God and if you're angry, don't suppress the anger but talk to God and unzip your heart, but, at the same time, keep your heart unzipped so God can interact with you and participate and speak into that space and to the experience.

Sarah: 19:02

There was a time in my life I was really angry with God. I felt like he left me. And later on, 10 years later, and I remember talking with God hey, what you know, this was. And I felt like God revealed to me Sarah, I didn't leave you. I was here in the room with you when you thought I left you, but I was actually here all the time and I was weeping because you didn't recognize that I was present.

Sarah: 19:24

And so I think it's really essential that we speak to God and that we're we're forthright, cause I think we're like, well, you can't be angry with God or you know you can't be, and and God knows all of that and all of the self-talk and the things that go through your head that are kind of ugly thoughts and maybe some ugly words. God knows all of that and it's not making God like anxious or oh my goodness, she said, or she, you know, god's not anxious about that. If you look at across human history, God's kind of navigated a variety of people and it's not like God is, like you know, freak it out. So I think it's really fundamentally, you have to be forthright with God and have that, have candid on ongoing conversations, you know, and really speak to God. This is what the deal is. This is what I'm wrestling with. This is what I'm going through. Isabel, what do you think?

Isabell: 20:24

Yeah, I'm just reminded of one of my favorite stories in the Bible is David and Bathsheba, and she experienced a great trauma at the hands of David, who was supposed to be God's like chosen one. But I think when we read Psalm 51, I think it's important to recognize, not only because in the book we talk about you experience trauma, but also we cause trauma and I think it's important to recognize that. And if we sit in the shame of having caused trauma and we don't let God heal that part of our hearts, like that just extenuates the circumstance and that can become traumatic. And then also we talk about helping others to heal from trauma. And so if you go into Psalms 51, david is begging the Lord for mercy and he's begging the Lord for purification and he's begging the Lord for a clean heart and joy of your salvation. And I think that's a great practical tool is, if you're experiencing trauma, if you're experiencing the guilt and the shame, that's double the amount of trauma.

Isabell: 21:27

And so, reading Psalm 51 and putting what happened to you at the feet of Jesus and saying, lord, this happened to me, it wasn't fair. I'm angry, but I trust you with this Lord. This happened, I did this to someone and I hate myself for it, but I trust you with this and I trust you with this, lord. This happened, I did this to someone and I hate myself for it, but I trust you with this and I trust you with this person, lord. This happened to a friend of mine. It's gross and it's ugly and I don't know how to handle it, but you know how to handle it, lord. And so here is this trauma. No matter what form it takes, please, lord, purify it, make it clean.

Lyvita: 22:00

Saints. We will get back to the episode, but I wanted to remind you to subscribe to Create Space, our newsletter, which is designed to help you grow as a believer and become more productive. Click on the link in the show notes to find out more. And oh, by the way, god and I, we love you. Now back to the episode. Okay, we have talked a lot about what trauma is, so let's get into the healing part of trauma. Are there like three things you can share that would help a listener who are going through right now? Maybe they had a troubled childhood or experienced something that is crippling in their life, or were part of a toxic relationship, or they've been raped, or they were caught in a lie, or they just came out of jail for something they didn't do. So how is it that we can begin this healing process you want to speak into?

Isabell: 23:13

that. Yeah, there are lots of different opportunities and obviously each person is individualistic in how the Lord will meet you in that place and bring healing. But the first one we've talked about it bring it to the Lord. Just be honest. God already knows what happens. But when we open up that chain of communication, it creates intimacy and it allows the dark places of our hearts to have light shine in them and the Lord can work where there's light.

Isabell: 23:40

The other thing is, especially if you have experienced an extremely significant trauma like rape, like physical assault, it is not admitting defeat to get therapy or counseling. If you had a broken arm, you would go see a doctor for your broken arm. If you have a part of your brain that's broken, it is okay to believe in Jesus and also for Jesus to use therapy. I've been in therapy for almost four years and the Lord has really used my therapist to speak into my heart and bring healing in a lot of ways. If you are a victim of assault, you need to reach out, tell someone it's okay, the Lord loves you. We want help, we want there to be healing and really if something is kept in the darkness, that is no good. Let's shine light into it. You are supported, you are loved, you are treasured. Reach out, get help, find community.

Sarah: 24:31

I think too, and I a hundred percent agree and I'm going to look at, you know, the. This book Road to wholeness relates to kind of digs down into the good Samaritan, the parable of the good Samaritan. And you know, the victim in the in this parable is the guy walking on the road of life, you know, and he gets jumped, accosted by this band group of bandits and they beat him up, they leave him half dead and they take all of his clothes. So those are three traumatic things, right, that kind of hits, all of the trauma stuff. But if you think about the good Samaritan, who is the hero? He's the hero in this story. What are the things he does? Number one he has compassion, and I think it was really important for us.

Sarah: 25:23

When we see a person who has been traumatized or they're acting out of their trauma, it tends to be repulsive, ugly, and we don't like it. And the priest and the Levite, they saw the trauma and it was repulsive to them and they kept walking. He'd just keep walking. But the good Samaritan has compassion. So, rather than seeing the trauma and how ugly and disgusting and repulsive it is, let's have compassion, and I think, compassion for ourselves as well, and that's the other thing. The guy couldn't get up, for ourselves as well, and that's the other thing. The guy couldn't get up, he couldn't remove himself from that place, he was left half dead. And so a lot of times with trauma we get trapped in it, we get stuck in it. And, to Isabel's point, you have a Good Samaritan.

Sarah: 26:13

Good Samaritan can be a therapist. It can be a collection, a variety of people. It can be friends, it can be family, it can be a pastor, it can be therapist counselor. I mean it can be a collection, a variety of people. It can be friends, it can be family, it can be a pastor, it can be therapist counselor. I mean it can be a doctor, like a whole variety of people. But they're all participants and we can participate. We can be the good Samaritan as well, with starting with compassion, so.

Sarah: 26:34

But you can't get out of the trauma, get removed from it without help. If you could, you would have already done that Right. So you have to think that way. But I like to what he did. He said it says he pours in the oil and the wine, you know, and the point of that is one, to disinfect the wounds and two, to bring comfort and soothing and help. And it says he lifts him up and puts him on his own beast of burden and carries him away. But you also look at it. It says he took him to an inn and they spent the night. So he paid the innkeeper and then he bought time because it wasn't enough.

Sarah: 27:19

It wasn't a one night recovery. This took time and I think with trauma we have to be aware that. You know, people participate, we participate in recovering from trauma. We have compassion and it takes time and it's not one person. Is the savior complex, right? So it isn't one person. Isabel and I were talking about a friend this morning that has kind of a savior mentality and it's interesting that this gentleman's recovery had a couple people participating in it, not just one. And so sometimes we're an innkeeper, sometimes we're the Good Samaritan. Hopefully we're not the priests and the Levite. We prefer not to be the bandits, but sometimes we are. So I think in this parable there's a lot of participants and I think for us we can potentially see ourselves as each participant at various times. But I think in terms of recovering from trauma, there's some essential ingredients in this parable that can be really helpful.

Lyvita: 28:22

And I think it's just awesome how you took such a little. It's just, it's a parable, it's not even the whole chapter, and that reminds me that trauma is an event. It's not the whole chapter of your life, it's just event, and how we have blown it up.

Lyvita: 28:42

Yeah, and then, and then I think about the book, how, how there's one parable you did a whole lot to, to to explain it, to bring it to life, to to make it today so it's more relatable. And I just think that's awesome Because it's like we get information and then we get fiction, you know, and then we get info and a story. I just liked how you put the book together and you were saying something about compassion for self. I think when we're going through trauma, we have this feeling of somewhere along the line, we did something, we weren't good enough, we missed the mark somewhere, and we start beating up ourselves but hearing that it's not just you self that helps you heal, it's others that come into play, that help you heal. So how is it that saints who see you going through, how can we actually help you without making you feel like something is wrong with you?

Isabell: 30:29

If somebody went through a really like, if there's been a loss in a family or a physical injury, I mean just showing up for the physical need, bringing food to families, being Jesus in skin, is the best way that we can. But if you think about what the Good Samaritan did, I love the wine, and then the oil, so the disinfectant and then the comfort, and sometimes we need people to pour disinfectant which might hurt. And so if you have a position in someone's life where you can be like you know, give them the tough love, like this wasn't your fault and you need to let this go, but also following that up with the oil. You're so loved, you're so treasured, you're so valuable, and a lot of times when we get stuck in places of trauma, we let the trauma become our identity instead of letting Jesus really tell us who we are. And so the Good Samaritan took him from the place of trauma and set him on the road again.

Isabell: 31:11

And so there will be people around you that are stuck in places of trauma and to come up next to them to say you are not what happened to you. You are a daughter or a son of the King, and there are so much more that the Lord has for you. This is not the end of your story and I'm going to love you and come up next to you and I'm going to listen to the voice of the spirit and talk where I need to talk, listen when I need to listen, because sometimes we say too much and we need to just shut up and let the person talk and get it out. And that's important too. But, being very sensitive to the Holy Spirit, I think too, being present.

Sarah: 31:43

You know, sometimes we want to say something to fix it or to solve it, and sometimes you don't need to do that. Sometimes you just need to be present. Yep, and it can be. You know, we're going to take a walk, we don't have to talk, we're going to sit and watch the movie or what, just just being present. And regardless of what they say, a lot of times when, when a person has trauma, they, they can say some ugly things and say some stuff that you don't agree with, and you know that's okay, not the end of the world.

Sarah: 32:16

Um, if you, if you stay steady, stay steady. I think that's one of the most important things and you know that's one of the scriptures that we read in Lamentations 3. Great is your faithfulness, the faithfulness of God. And you know, at the end of the Bible it says well done my good and faithful people. Right, it doesn't say high achiever, you produce results. This is faithful, and I think there's just a whole lot of value in showing up, being consistent and being faithful. And a lot of times, what we say isn't the end isn't as helpful sometimes as just being steady and present. So I think there's a lot of value in that and and not freaking out.

Sarah: 33:04

People say things, people, you know they cuss or they, you know whatever, mad at god, I'm walking away from god. Okay, that's fine, you know. It doesn't mean I'm leaving, I just I get it and and that's where you're at today and this is a place in your journey. But it doesn't mean I'm cutting bait and I'm out. I get it. I have my own struggles and doubts and and that's not, it's not the end, all be all. We're just one human. I, my dad, used to say this I'm one baker showing another baker where there's bread. You know, my dad used to remember him saying that yeah, yeah, my my dad would say I'm just one baker showing another baker where there's bread.

Lyvita: 33:45

Oh, wow, yeah.

Sarah: 33:47

And my dad was. You know, he was good at some of that. He was also a little quirky, A little different.

Lyvita: 33:57

Oh, I like that. So how do we know that we are healing from?

Isabell: 34:02

trauma. Yeah, so a great temperature checker is your self-talk. We talked about that If you're able to talk well about yourself and if you're able to look in the mirror and see what Jesus sees and not what happened to you. The other thing is the trauma responses are fight, flight or freeze and so like for me, when I was in the car after the car accident and I'm freaking out because I'm in the passenger seat, there's that fear and that trauma response. I recognize that that was a trauma response and so, moving forward, I'm able to check in with myself.

Isabell: 34:40

If I'm sitting in the passenger seat of a car, am I scared anymore? Am I frightened? Is this causing me to freeze up, to lock up, to get scared, to want to leave the car? And then also in the way that we treat the people around us you were talking about, if somebody is going through a trauma, they might say some really cruel things to you and you might lash out to the people that are close to you and you know through your healing journey, if you're able to understand like the people around me are not here to you, know, hurt me, but they're here to help me, and so when you stop lashing out and are able to forgive yourself and also to forgive God and um, just to sit in peace, too, and to let yourself be mad. But to let yourself be happy and to experience the range of human emotions is really significant too, because after a trauma you can freeze up and get numb, but if you're able to grieve, but you're also able to experience joy, that's a really good sign. Like you're not numb, congratulations, that's really good I think I think too.

Sarah: 35:45

Um, one of the things for healing, too, is that I recognize it and then that there are triggers that that I can, that, if I'm aware of some of those triggers and my behaviors, I recognize this behavior is an instinct or trigger from this experience. Right, and then I think too, choosing, I have free will, I'm not controlled, I'm not dominated, and I think the whole fight, flight or freeze, if you find yourself being combative and hostile and aggressive, or if you find yourself like shutting down, you know, then those are those trauma instincts a lot of times and think about it, is this my best self or is this the trauma self? If I'm hostile, if I'm aggressive and I'm, you know, I have friends who that's, their first instinct is to fight, you know, and I'm like my first instinct is to run away. I'm a flighter, yeah Right. Sometimes I freeze too.

Sarah: 36:54

I was about to say I'm a freezer, yeah, but if, if we find ourselves doing that, then we have to and and recognizing oh, that's what I'm doing, but it's not my best self. So I think it's a little bit of of awareness and I think it's really important. Holy spirit leads us into truth and I think we have to have Holy spirit. He is our comforter. Holy spirit speaks truth to us, leads us into truth about ourselves as well as others. So I think that's a very essential ingredient for us in continuing to heal.

Lyvita: 37:35

I want to sum this up by saying we talked about bringing it to the Lord, talking it, talking it through, recognizing it. Recognizing that we have trauma, that we've gone through something, Recognize the triggers, Be honest. And that brings me back to can we talk to God? Remember the boy.

Isabell: 38:03

Yeah.

Lyvita: 38:05

So it's about talking to him and also making sure that when we're in the state that we're with community, yeah, 100%. I want to say thank you for being a part of this episode, because trauma was a big thing for me this year. What's in the future for the two of you?

Isabell: 38:30

I mean later today I'm gonna be getting lunch um are y'all gonna plan another book, or yes?

Sarah: 38:41

we are, we are. We're working right now on kind of a sequel to this. So this is called Road to Wholeness and then the sequel is the Road Home and it's based on the Prodigal Son. Oh, stop, yeah. And one of the things that's cool on this, this project, is I wrote the nonfiction part, like all the Bible stuff, and Isabel has written the second half of it. So it's a joint project. She's done the fiction part, which is a modern day allegory, and the allegory makes it so helpful to us because sometimes you read the bible and it's like you know somewhere three thousand two. It doesn't relate. But Isabel, when you wrote the fiction piece, tell us a little bit about kind of your heart behind that.

Isabell: 39:30

So Jesus used parables throughout his whole ministry, and the power of story is so significant. And there's a reason why he used parables because his audience could imagine themselves into a story better. And so I think that when we present this parable as a modern day allegory, it's easier to imagine ourselves into the story if it's more relatable, and so I love the power of story. Cs Lewis is one of my favorite authors and I feel like when you read Narnia and you fall in love with Aslan and then he dies, you're like what? And you're like, oh my gosh, it's Jesus. What, that's crazy. And so I had so much fun with this allegory and just kind of let my creative gifts flow. But this next one, the Road Home, is going to be the retelling of the Prodigal Son parable, and there's going to be some characters from this first book that show up in the Road Home Interesting, yeah, the characters that you know and love. You might see again.

Isabell: 40:38

Oh, okay.

Lyvita: 40:40

Okay, you know y'all know my email. Oh, okay, okay, I'll be. You know y'all know my email. That's great. So how can we reach? How can the listeners contact you, find out more about you?

Isabell: 40:56

Yeah, you can get the book on Amazon, on Barnes and Noble. You can follow us on social media. My mom is Sarah Genuine Love. I'm your pal, isabel. I'm only on Instagram, though. You can get the book on.

Sarah: 41:10

Amazon, Barnes and Noble I think there's a couple of mortar brick stores that have them as well, so it's easy to grab one easy.

Lyvita: 41:18

But say, if you get the Create Space, you'll actually have the book review, so you can find out even more. Okay. So any last words about healing from trauma before we close out.

Isabell: 41:33

Don't be afraid of the healing process. I know that it can be really difficult to start that journey into healing, especially if you've been sitting in trauma for years, into healing, especially if you've been sitting in trauma for years. But if we give those little areas of our heart that are still scarred to God, you can create something very beautiful out of that.

Sarah: 41:50

I agree.

Lyvita: 41:51

Yes, yes. So, isabel, can you pray us out?

Isabell: 41:57

Yeah, absolutely, lord.

Isabell: 41:59

I thank you right now for the opportunity to get to come together in unity and to get to come together, um, to really seek your heart for for trauma and for traumatic situations.

Isabell: 42:09

And I thank you, lord, that your heart is not for us to stay in that place of brokenness, but to come up next to each other, to lift each other up and to continue on our own journey, um, and our own road to wholeness. And I thank you, jesus, that that every person listening would experience your Holy Spirit in a new way to receive not only the healing for things that have happened to them, but also to best help those around us who have been dealing with traumatic situations. Thank you, jesus, for helping us learn to recognize trauma, but not only to recognize, but to learn to grow and to heal and to move forward hand in hand with you. So, jesus, we welcome you into all of the dark and twisty areas of our heart, the scary parts, and we ask you to just be our comforter and bring light and joy and wholeness, and we thank you and we praise you in your name. We pray, amen, amen, amen.

Lyvita: 43:08

Saints, thanks for tuning in. If you enjoyed this episode, then get your free newsletter called Create Space to help you declutter your mind, make sense of your heartaches and improve your self-talk so you can go and do what God's called you to do. All this and more can be found, including my contact information, on HangingOutWithJesusPodcastcom or the show notes. So until we meet again on the airwaves, intentionally and daily hang out with Jesus Shalom.

Isabell: 43:50

That's so cute.