Next Level University

#1765 - Circumstances Change But Principles Stay The Same…

Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 38:30

Can principles guide you to lasting success and happiness? In today’s engaging episode, hosts Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros explore how essential principles shape our lives. Whether handling money, nurturing relationships, or achieving personal goals, sticking to strong principles can make all the difference. They discuss the power of consistent habits, how our mindset influences behavior, and why success often depends more on our principles than our circumstances. Tune in to learn how following core principles can lead to lasting success and happiness and get practical tips to assess and improve them.

Links mentioned:
Subscribe at NLU: https://www.buzzsprout.com/742955/share
Free 30-Minute Coaching Call with Alan: https://bit.ly/3zLc1Up

______________________

NLU is not just a podcast; it’s a gateway to a wealth of resources designed to help you achieve your goals and dreams. From our Next Level Dreamliner to our Group Coaching, we offer a variety of tools and communities to support your personal development journey.

For more information, please check out our website at the link below. 👇

Website 💻  http://www.nextleveluniverse.com

_______________________

Any of these communities or resources are FREE to join and consume
Next Level Nation - https://www.facebook.com/groups/459320958216700
Next Level 5 To Thrive (free course) - ​​https://bit.ly/3xffver
Next Level U Book Club - https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/next-level-book-club/
Next Level Monthly Meet-up:  https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/monthly-meetups/

_______________________

We love connecting with you guys! Reach out on Instagram, Facebook, or via email. We’re here to support you in your personal and professional development journey.

Instagram 📷
Kevin: https://www.instagram.com/neverquitkid/
Alan: https://www.instagram.com/alazaros88/

Facebook ✍
Alan: https://www.facebook.com/alan.lazaros
Kevin: https://www.facebook.com/kevin.palmieri.90/

Email 💬
Kevin@nextleveluniverse.com
Alan@nextleveluniverse.com

LinkedIn ✍
Kevin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-palmieri-5b7736160/
Alan: https://www.linkedin.com/in/alanlazarosllc/

_______________________

Show notes:
(2:15) Principles and paradigms
(6:28) If easy, it wouldn’t be valued
(9:38) Ask yourself
(13:05) Quality of relationship
(17:04) Intention and passion
(19:22) Meet like-minded people and jumpstart your journey to achieving your dreams while optimizing your life. Join Next Level Group Coaching.

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

🎙️ Hosted by Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

Next Level University is a top-ranked daily podcast for dream chasers and self-improvement lovers. With over 2,100 episodes, we help you level up in life, love, health, and wealth one day at a time. Subscribe for real, honest, no-fluff growth every single day.

Speaker 1

Next Level Nation. Welcome back to another episode of Next Level University, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. Today, for episode number 1,760, oh, I'm Jeffing everything, so today's episode is Tuesday. I think today's episode is 1,764. Please hold, I need to hit back back, back, back, back, back, back back. Please hold, we're going to do this live because this is par for the course. Yeah, so this is 1,765. Circumstances change, but principles stay the same. I changed the list and I Jeffed the whole thing. I'll make sure, before we record the next one, that I'm actually correct on this, but I'm pretty sure this is 1,765.

Speaker 2

All right, we welcome mistakes.

Speaker 1

Yeah, we are always making mistakes. We were having a conversation today about finances, as we do on Mondays. So Mondays for us are we meet and it's changed a lot as the business has changed, but it used to be we would meet and then try to do all of our episodes in one day. Now we meet and we go over the business and we figure out the state of the business and we have business talks and then we try to get as many done as possible. And today was a fundamental finance day.

Speaker 1

So we went through our finances, we discussed finances, we discussed lowering expenses, making more money, and what I think we were both humbly reminded of is, if you do not follow the principles, the circumstances don't really matter much.

Principles and paradigms

Speaker 1

Circumstances meaning, if you somebody was to give you a million dollars, but one of your principles is I spend as much money as humanly possible, you're going to go through that million dollars pretty quickly. Yeah, it's a terrible principle and this is the reason that many, many lottery winners end up with less money than they had before, because they didn't necessarily have the principles to create the wealth, which means they don't have the principles to sustain the wealth. So that's really what we wanted to talk about today is principles matter more than circumstances. Principles dictate behavior, and I guess the ultimate thing is what you do on the day-to-day, the way you show up your beliefs, the way that you strategize. That is all way more important than the circumstantial ups and downs that happen in life. If one of your principles is never go to bed without being connected to your partner, it doesn't really matter that you had an argument before bed, because you're going to stay up late and you're going to make sure that you're connected before bed.

Speaker 2

And.

Speaker 1

I think one of the issues with lack of success, lack of fulfillment, lack of momentum is probably lack of clarity on your overall principles or not knowing the importance of what principles are in the first place. So that's where we're going to go today the not knowing the importance of what principles are in the first place.

Speaker 2

so that's where we're going to go today. Well, there's a bunch of different paradigms, and paradigm is for the long-term listeners you know this, but for anyone who's a new listener, I want to talk specifically to you. A paradigm is a, a deep belief about the purpose of life, a deep belief about what matters in life, a deep belief about what the point of life is. And so there's a book called the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey, and he talks about paradigms and how each paradigm determines what principles you live by. And there's a whole bunch of different types of paradigms. We've talked about this at Next Level Live. We do this in group coaching. There's family-centered Some people believe that life is about family.

Speaker 2

Some people believe that life is about work. Those are the workaholics, quote-unquote of the world. I'm not making that wrong either. I mean, that's a choice, hopefully a conscious one. Some people believe that life is about fun and pleasure and basically, if you've ever heard that quote of the point of life is not to get to the end safely, but to have as much fun as you can along the way. So I think a very dangerous paradigm. I've been there, but I do think it's a paradigm. So, and then there's also spouse centered, so everything is the intimate relationship. There's a bunch of them.

Speaker 2

Yeah, in Stephen Covey's book he talks about a principle-centered paradigm. So the principle that you live by is principles. It's kind of like a meta-paradigm. It's interesting. So when I first met you, kev, you were in a certain paradigm. I was in my certain paradigm and we've cultivated over time more and more and more a mission-centered paradigm, which means that we make meaningful progress toward meaningful goals for a meaningful purpose and that's the best way I know how to articulate it now. But essentially, to build a self-improvement company. Health, wealth, life and love that helps people become more successful and fulfilled is really what we live for, and secondary to that is pretty much everything else, and that's a good thing and that's a choice. And a lot of times when you and I eat humble pie whether it be in fitness or finance or life a lot of times I go back to my true north, my necklace that I wear around my neck, my north star, and we talked a little bit about mission on a recent episode last week.

Speaker 2

But I always ask myself well, this is so hard and I have to whenever it gets really hard. There's a bunch of different responses that I have. One is whoa, this is harder than I expected. Number two is immediately it goes to. It's the is harder than I expected. Number two is immediately it goes to it's the hard that makes it great.

Speaker 2

If it was easy, everyone would do it. It's the hard that makes it rare and what makes it great and the truth is that's facts. There's a reason not everyone is ripped. There's a reason not everyone's rich. There's a reason why not everyone has a magnificent relationship. It's hard, and if it was easy it wouldn't be valued, and so that's really important.

If easy, it wouldn't be valued

Speaker 2

And then I always eventually get back to this place of why am I even doing this? Why am I doing this? Because, as challenging, as arrogant as it might sound, I gave up a lot of really easy paths. Easier paths I don't want to say easy paths because I don't think there is an easy path I think there's easier paths than starting a self-improvement company, and some of my alternative potential corporate careers were definitely significantly easier from a financial perspective than this. And we're doing really well and I'm grateful for that, and we're going to get through. But underneath it all, I really come back to this one simple thing if we get to start a self-improvement company that is built on the idea of believing in human beings and helping them build a bigger, better, brighter future.

Speaker 2

Because I remember the days when I used to sell automation equipment for really big checks and it wasn't really helping people in a way that fulfilled me as a human being, that fulfilled me on the soul and emotional level. Yeah, it filled my bank account and yeah, it filled the fund that I could have with that money and it certainly filled my investment accounts and all that kind of stuff, but it didn't fill me on the soul level. And so I'm grateful that we get to do something in the world that, even when it's hard, it's still worth it. And so, for anyone out there, the principle thing. Let's go back to principles. Kev, you've become someone who, I think, lives by principles, and not only lives by principles but also updates those principles year after year that are more accurate, they're more beneficial, they're more, because there's pros and cons to all principles. And so when I first met you, you didn't have a whole lot of principles.

Speaker 1

And lift heavy. One of my that was probably the only one I really have is lift heavy weight lift heavy weight.

Speaker 2

Treat people with kindness, be generous. Right, you had some. You definitely had some. Yeah, lift no matter what. Lift regardless of amount of hours of sleep right, stuff like that.

Speaker 1

That definitely was one that was one of them.

Speaker 2

So. So I would rather quiz, quiz, I would rather ask you questions on this one Sure, which is what are the principles that you live by now that you traded in for old, maybe, maybe, outdated principles? I want I want everyone to hopefully think from a computer engineer perspective on this of software updates, the iOS update that you get on your iPhone or the software update you get on your computer. Windows 11 is better than Windows 10. It still has its kinks, but it's, overall, better. Kev, you are the 3.5 version of Kevin Palmieri and your principles, your software, your operating system has been updated over and over and over and over again with these more sophisticated principles, and I would love to know what they used to be, old Kev, versus what they are now.

Speaker 1

In this case, your definition of principles is a unique set of beliefs that you live by.

Speaker 2

Yeah, exactly Yep A unique set of beliefs that you live by that help guide you in your decision-making paradigm.

Speaker 1

Man old principles.

Ask yourself

Speaker 1

What's an example of an old one that didn't serve you in hindsight, that now you've updated an old one that didn't serve you in hindsight that now you've updated, I would say the level of value something has in my life is directly connected to the level of fun it brings me. That was kind of an old principle. I chose things out of funness more than anything else, and I still like to have fun, but it's not really the same. It's not the same. I wasn't very impact-driven. One of my principles was not do the best you can so you can impact the most. That wasn't one back in the day and I understand why I didn't really have my. I didn't know my purpose. I didn't feel like I was on a mission. I didn't feel like I was intentional, like I was living. I am like living like I am today. What else?

Speaker 2

So what's your new one? So you replaced that principle of the level of value of something or someone in my life is predicated on the amount of fun I can have. What is it now?

Speaker 1

The level of value of something in my life is directly connected to the level of fulfillment it brings me. I would say Fulfillment is just a different thing. It's a different thing. Taryn and I were talking about this yesterday. So Taryn helped me clean the office and we went through the closet and we went through the closet and we went through my clothes and I donated so many clothes Like so many, and I said I'm super grateful you helped me Because I wouldn't have donated as many clothes as I did if she wasn't here in the office with me. But our gratitudes last night were the fact that it was so much fun. We had such a fun day, even though it was just a mundane yeah thing that just I neither of us really wanted to do, but it was awesome that we did it together and I felt really fulfilled at the end of the day as a couple. I felt like we really grew together and we learned about each other and it was awesome you also did finance stuff too.

Speaker 2

That was, we did finance stuff. Yeah, right, sometimes the hard stuff is fulfilling when you're together with someone. Yeah, well.

Speaker 1

Well, I think one of the reasons you've heard me talk about this recently a lot is I feel like my relationship has been just amazing. Well, I think we've had a lot of hard conversations. So that it makes sense. There's something about that. There's something about going into the weeds with someone. I think that's why you and I have a great relationship. We've had so many hard conversations over the last seven years. Yeah, man, so that's a principle I'm trying to adopt. A principle I'm trying to adopt is the quality of a relationship is not based on the ease of the relationship. It's based on the depth and understanding of the people in the relationship, and the only real way to get that is to have real talks. As much as it sucks, it's not about the thing. That's easy, necessarily. It's easy not to do check-ins. It's very easy not to do check-ins.

Speaker 2

Yeah.

Speaker 1

It's easier not to do check-ins than it is to do them. Definitely.

Speaker 2

Because there's less resistance in the short term, in the long term not so much because it just builds and builds and builds.

Quality of relationship

Speaker 2

Yeah, neglect, I'm convinced. I mean, half the things you and I talked about today are from past neglect. And I'm not trying to say that we are neglectful I think we're some of the most proactive people I've ever met but we have neglected certain things that needed to be brought up eventually, and you always have to pay the piper, so to speak, and so check-ins are proactive activities of action toward not being neglectful in your relationship, or in your finances, or in your fitness or whatever it is it's so hard to know, because I didn't.

Speaker 1

I don't know what my principles were back then, because I don't think I had that many you did, but they were unconscious.

Speaker 2

Everyone does like. This is how human beings make decisions.

Speaker 1

Yeah, I don't, I wasn't thinking of them I wasn't aware of them. I was just kind of going through life. I'm convinced one of the reasons I was in much better shape is one of my principles was you track calories, no matter what, it doesn't matter. If it's summer, it doesn't matter. If it's winter, it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter. You track calories. That one principle changes everything.

Speaker 1

It changes everything and I am suffering right now pretty badly. I am suffering today. I am so hungry. It's not even funny again privilege pressure. I signed up for this. It is what it is. But there's also that piece of me that I'm so excited when this, when this diet and this cut is over, to actually track my calories and build muscle. But if I lose that principle, everything falls off.

Speaker 2

Everything falls off I had someone message me yesterday. This is this person listens to the show, so they'll know I'll keep it anonymous, but this was really cool. It's a new client. Uh, he said hold on, hold on hold. On another thing, I wonder is it okay to just check the box on the habits? I wonder if, maybe, yes, it is thoughts, love the question. That's a great question.

Speaker 2

I said this is a very phil, uh, very fascinating philosophical concept. I would say my position is a duality of what he was saying and what you are saying. Oh, this, that's a different one. Sorry, that's a different one. Looking forward to digging deeper on that. For sure I have a lot underneath that too. Yep, that's the second thing. What do you mean? Just checking the box question mark?

Speaker 2

He said philosophically, like, like, I did it, quote unquote we all know what it feels like to do something just to check the box versus going and being intentional in the gym. So when you plan a workout and you are really present and you're engaged and you crush the lift and you're in, it is very different than let me just get this workout done and check the box right. So I said this. I said yes, that's totally fine. Sometimes it's training your brain to get dopamine after accomplishment. There's a lot of neuroscience underneath why habit tracking is so powerful. I know you know from the habit books you've read Grind it out and keep the small promises you make to yourself. Try to do them with passion and intention, of course, but sometimes it's just a grind and that's where you start Start believing that you this is how you start believing you're the type of person who always principle, always keeps their promises to themselves themselves if and especially when it's hard. That's the type of person who becomes unstoppable.

Speaker 2

That one principle that you have of I track calories, no matter what. I had that for 467 days straight back in my fitness modeling days. I remember my fitness pal gave me like a congratulations, you haven't, you've opened this app every day for 457 days, or whatever it is. Dude, I was in way better shape because of that. That was one principle that I stayed. I stuck with for 457 days straight. That one principle brought a lot of results. And, yeah, some days I was just tracking, checking the box. Other days I was really meticulous, making sure I weigh every grain of rice. Either way, getting that one principle done every single day has made massive impacts. And so again back to the fundamental value of principles. Principles are things that you decide in advance and you stick to no matter what. And that's really hard, because a principle-centered life feels boring it does, it can't, it can, it can feel constricting.

Intention and passion

Speaker 1

I have, uh, there's a new perspective I have when I was and again it still depends it's summer, summer in New Hampshire, so it's hot. I like to have the windows down, I like to have the sunroof open. It depends whether I'm going to the gym or coming back. I like to have music going, it depends. But I used to see really nice cars and think about the music that they were listening to. I used to think that was a flex to have a really nice car and have a really nice sound system To bump your music. Now I think it's a flex to have a really nice car and to be listening to an audio book, because that's become more of a principle and again, it's not sexy. Nobody's going to be like yeah.

Speaker 1

Your sound system's bumping while you're listening to Atomic Habits, but that's a principle. A principle is no matter how nice the car is, there's an audio book playing, no matter how nice the house is, whatever, there's a TED Talk on the TV, right, whatever, hypothetically, no matter how nice the trip is, there's a gallon of water or a food scale. And again, this is me talking about me. But those are all principles. This is awesome.

Speaker 2

Do you believe that you can get certain results without developing first the principles necessary to achieve them?

Speaker 1

Yes. By luck most. By luck, I mean it's a lot easier to be in shape when you're in your 20s. I know a lot of people that never went to the gym. They were in really good shape, they were just in good shape. They didn't. And honestly, yes, because when you're given the result without the principles, you lose the result later and you don't know why you think you did something wrong when in reality you never really did the thing right to begin with yeah and that's where things get weird.

Speaker 1

That's where things get very, very weird. So, yes, I would say yes, for sure. You go viral, you get lucky, you make a connection, the principles. I'm convinced that's why many of us end up less successful over time, because the luck or the genetics or the age or the momentum that we built when we were younger, that we didn't realize we were building, just wears off.

Meet like-minded people and jumpstart your journey to achieving your dreams while optimizing your life. Join Next Level Group Coaching.

Speaker 1

And then you wake up one day and you're like, how the hell did I get here? And on the opposite end, it's been a weird time for me where a lot of things have gone really well over the past six months and I have those moments where it's like, how did we get here? How did that happen? It's just been. There's just been a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot of principles. But I'll tell you, principles suck too. I said this on a podcast the other day Pops was coming over for dinner and when P comes over, we do some cleaning and I'm usually in charge of the bathroom. I usually do the bathroom. We have this thing that holds the mouthwash and the toothpaste and all this stuff, and I had a moment where I was like, ah, that's clean enough. It's clean enough, it's not that big of a deal, I don't have to take the mouthwash off and all that. Then it's on Swap the poop deck, first mate, I had to swap the poop deck.

Speaker 1

I had a moment where I said what would the best version of Kevin do? And that might maybe that sounds like a fortune cookie thing or it sounds like one of those things, I don't care, it helps me tremendously. And I had that moment where I decided that that's a principle of mine. If, intuitively, when I asked that question, the answer is Kevin, the best version of Kevin, would do this, then I have to do the thing and that has become a principle that I've lived by for however long, and it's it sucks. I don't want to do it, but I felt really good after and that's building self-trust and that's building a self-investment. I'm pouring into Kevin and I'm making Kevin proud, and that's, that's one of my principles, and that principle has helped me a ton.

Speaker 1

Could I give you anything externally or physically a result? No, nope, I can't, but it's definitely helped me internally. So principles aren't always external stuff. Sometimes it's internal stuff that you live by. That nobody will ever. Nobody would ever know that if I didn't say it. But I know, like the calorie thing, nobody's gonna know if I track calories or not. I had I do go.

Principle sucks, too, and the birch beer incident

Speaker 2

Sorry to interrupt you. I, I, I do things like that too, and it's interesting because when you said no one would ever know that unless I said it, I had a moment where it's oh, I did something the other day that no one would know emilia knows. So I'm at the self checkout at hannaford and I'm buying all the stuff we can't get at walmart because we use walmart plus and usually we get those delivered. But there's certain things at hannaford walmart doesn't have, vice versa, so I'll go in. We needed some extras. I was too, so I'm in there and I scanned everything. Good to go.

Speaker 2

Walking out, I realized I didn't scan two of the birch beers diet birch beers that we get and I was like, oh my God, I just stole. I just stole two diet birch beers. And I had this moment with myself and I said Alan, next time you're in Hannaford, you're going to double swipe two birch beers and pay for them, and I will do that. No one would ever know. I told him you know? When I got home I said can you please remind me? Next time we're in there, we're going to double swipe, I'm not going to steal. Now, here's the thing right, and this is really what we need to talk about. It's a principle for me. No one else would ever care. It was an accident. I didn't purposely steal it. No one would even know. I would know. Yeah, I.

Speaker 2

It bothered me every day since a little bit, not a ton, like I don't think I'm a horrible person. How dare you do that? Oh my god. And, by the way, the place was mobbed too. By the way, there was huge line. I was needed to go home, like I would have just gone back in typically, but I was already at the car and I noticed when I it was just two. So it's like eight bucks, right, and I'm gonna double swipe next time twice. I will remember that and I will pay that back Because I know that's who I want to be and I never planned on telling anyone Other than emilia that. But I do stuff like that all the time and there was a time in my life when I was a teenager where I wouldn't have done that.

Speaker 2

But here's the truth underneath all this. I didn't have as sound of principles and I was. I didn't like myself as much Did I think I was the worst person on earth because I stole from Target when I was 17? No $10 sunglasses. I don't think I deserve to go to jail for 20 years or anything like that. What I do know is I feel better about who I am now, and I think that that has to be earned. I think it has to be earned through doing the right thing, and doing the right thing is in quotes, because you know the high road. I am reading a book right now called High Road Leadership. I'm just going to be very honest I think it's garbage. I don't think I didn't like it either. It's not good, right, it's not great, I gave up on it.

Speaker 2

Yeah, good for you. Now here's the thing. I don't like the book. And it's not a bad book, it's just just. I think john has kind of let it ride at this point. He's older, he, he's, I think he's had, you know, a lot of people get, get older and they, they retire and he's still doing his thing. So, whatever, he helps a lot of people. I respect his work. I don't like to associate with anyone, whatever.

Speaker 2

Here's my point high road leadership. I was waiting for that book for a long time because it was on pre-order on audible for a while, and the reason I wanted that book so badly is I think it's the best title ever high road leadership. We all know what the high road is. The low road is steal the two birch beers, never think about it again. Brush it under the rug, lock it away in the vault and just move forward with your life and think that it has no impact. The high road is. Next time you're in Hannaford, you double scan a birch beer to make sure that you pay for what you earn, what you buy. I like high road leadership because all of us inside of us have an internal compass of what the high road is. And if you take the high road, even though it's usually the harder road, I actually think that's where you start to love yourself, and I think when you love yourself, you're more fulfilled, and when you're more fulfilled, you don't hurt other people.

Speaker 1

This is a, so this is the principle. The principle is well, that's a big corporation, they're not going to miss the $8.

Speaker 2

That's a principle for some people, not everybody. For some people, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1

When? So when Taryn and I bought new beds, when we got the adjustable beds, the mattresses we got, I liked it because mine was very firm. Taryn hated it, it was too firm for her, so we sent one back. They thought we sent both of them back. And these, I think these, these were not cheap mattresses. And I remember thinking to myself I could message them and say hey, you, actually I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, I couldn't, I didn't want to, I didn't want to hurt us, I didn't want to hurt us, I didn't want to hurt us more than it would have helped someone else. And that's my honest truth. Because, again, we weren't I mean, these were expensive and we weren't crushing it to the point where it was like, yeah, get whatever bed you want, it doesn't matter. This was like a pretty big investment for us. But so maybe I broke my principles that time. I don't know, I don't think so.

Speaker 2

But maybe I have a new. I didn't mean to interrupt you and I appreciate you sharing, by the way, sharing on a public medium things like this.

Speaker 1

I mean, it's just, it's the truth, it is what it is. I had a moment where it was like I could message them, but them but it's not.

Shame, suppress, and taking responsibility

Speaker 2

I guess it's not enough of a principle that I'm gonna feel bad about myself if I don't do it. Well, I think it's not only will you might feel bad, but maybe not at a big enough richter scale to where you need to right, because there's levels of good and bad. So so this is one thing that came to me recently. I know we gotta jump, yeah, jump, yeah. I said this to the NLU team once I don't know if it was on NLCC. I'm coaching on how to coach, and I said something along the lines of I've come to understand that if you are hiding something, you're hiding something from anyone. It means one of two things. This is my theory.

Speaker 2

Anytime you've been hiding something and all of us hide things, everyone it's just to what extent and how much? Okay, I hide way less than I used to, but everyone has their own privacy. If you are hiding something and this is my own internal dialogue that means, alan, you are either number one ashamed of it within yourself or number two being suppressed by someone else. So I was afraid to share the birch beer thing because I'm ashamed of it. I'm not ashamed of me. Gonna go rectify it, me gonna go rectify it. I'm going to go rectify it, but I was ashamed of it on the drive home. And so then I said what do I do about this? Rather than get stuck in shame, what am I going to go do differently? How am I going to go be a better person? And and what else? Where else are you going to start than that stuff?

Speaker 2

Because when you, when you love yourself, it has to be someone everyone out there watching or listening think about someone. You admire that person. If you admire them, even though you've never told them, probably which is a weird whole nother episode that person you admire. What about them do you admire? We admire people who have courage. We admire people who have vulnerability. We admire people who have compassion. We admire people who take the high road.

Speaker 2

That's the one fundamental principle of leadership. That's why, even though that book is garbage, in my opinion the title is worth it High road leadership. I think about it all the time. What is the high road here? Now to Kevin's point. You cannot take the high road at the detriment of yourself, constantly trying to save everyone else. You can't do that, because if you do that you're screwing yourself and then you can't take care of anyone. So you've got to understand the high road is something that keeps getting higher as you become more aware and more evolved as your principles evolve along the way, and so, to me, one of my principles is always take the high road. And that high road has become more sophisticated as I've gotten more mature, and so I bet you, this version of you, kev probably would have done differently, but back then, maybe in the circumstances, nah, mm-mm. Okay, well then, I'm projecting, but at the end of the day.

Speaker 1

No, it just. I think for me it's like a. So when I go, almost every time I go and get food, I'll get like two drinks like two diet sprites. Food I get, I'll get like two drinks like two diet sprites. And I always make sure because they never see them and they're like, okay, so you got uh, this, this, this, and I always say yeah, and I get two diet sprites always, every single time. I will never, ever. That's because that's different to me, it's different, it's different to me that I'm in control of it. It's almost like who am I to throw a kink in the universe's plans for me?

Speaker 2

and not only that, but you also believe it's almost like who am I to throw a kink in the universe's plans for me?

Speaker 1

and not only that, but you also believe it's their responsibility if right, I've messed up before where I've probably given somebody more than I should have. I don't expect them to save me. That's on me. Yeah, okay. Well then that means you have a different principle?

Speaker 2

yeah, I think it's their responsibility to rectify their mistakes is what you're saying versus with the sprites.

Speaker 1

That's entirely your responsibility to and I think for me it probably depends on it. Probably to a degree it probably depends on the size of the corporation. Probably. I mean tempur-pedic, they're gonna be fine.

Speaker 2

They're gonna be fine, you know, it's well then, that there's a principle under that too, which is fighting for the little guy.

Speaker 1

Well, that's always so. That makes sense. That's always a piece of it. I think it's just, kev, you know, you know, you know if somebody delivered you pizza and they delivered you the wrong pizza, they're going to get in trouble. That they gave me $75 worth of pizza for 20 bucks. The next person's house they go to that's going to be a whole thing. That's different. That's that's much different to me, but I think a lot of it is. I don't want to, and it probably sounds selfish, maybe it does, I don't know, I don't. I'm not going to put myself in a worse position to um, I'm just weighing it. Who's in the worst position in this case, me or them? And if it's them, if it's me by a long shot. I think that's my principle, whatever that means.

Conditioning Vs. Principles

Speaker 2

Right, okay. Well, underneath all of this for everyone listening, what are your principles? Because they're running you whether you know them or not. And then here's the last piece. I know we got got to jump. Is it conditioning or is it a principle? That's one thing that I think is very powerful for everyone. Is this a principle that you decided, a standard that you've set that you want to do, like the calories, no matter what, or is it conditioning from your childhood? So here's one you eat everything on your plate. That's something that most people have from their childhood, particularly people in our generation Kev, the Gen X and millennials, because the baby boomers generation statistically didn't have as much back then. So they said you eat everything on your plate. That proves that you're grateful. Now you're over here eating everything on your plate, but food is way more abundant, and now we're all getting, you know, not hitting our fitness goals. So the difference between conditioning and principles that is where I think real success and fulfillment is created.

Speaker 1

And I hope nobody hates me and and if you're, if you work for a tempur-pedic, I hope you don't hate me because, again, I just did. I just did what felt right at the time you know, I'm not robbing here. I give a lot away. I'm a martyr for the cause I donate. It's not that it was just.

Speaker 2

We could really use that eight hundred dollars really use that and you also believe you really really use that $800. And you also believe you'll use it better than Tempopedic. I understand this is the thing I'm proud of you for owning, whatever it is. I think that takes a lot of maturity, regardless of what other people are going to think of it. At the end of the day, we all have our own unique high road and I hope everyone's taking more and more and more of it. The end of the day, we all have our own unique high road and I hope everyone's taking more and more and more of it, and you have to live with it.

Speaker 1

You're the one who has to live with it. I mean, other people do too, but nobody knows to the degree that you know. Okay, if you are focused on getting to the next level a little bit more, every single day, seven days a week, you know we drop an episode on youtube as well as all the podcast platforms. Make sure you are subscribed so you never miss an opportunity to grow. Trust me, I know some days you don't really want to do it. I can just check the box. I'll take today off, but then you get a little gentle reminder NLU has dropped a new episode sent directly to your phone. Maybe that'll be the gentle kick in the butt. We need to continue that consistency. So subscribe on whatever podcast platform you are listening on, or YouTube, if you're watching us there. We would appreciate it.

Speaker 2

I wish that we could show people the version of you that improves by one percent per day, compounded over time, versus the version of you that doesn't, and I wish I could do that with myself. I wish I could do that with you, kev. I think it would blow our minds and I think if we could see the difference in fulfillment and success and physique and health and wealth and love, I think we would have a much easier time doing the hard thing in the moment. And so, if anyone wants help with that, which is accountability, one of my clients just started a fitness accountability group. Shout out to you if you're listening. She does listen. She actually shares too. I'm just excited to be in there. She put me into, and I think accountability is something that's wildly undervalued.

Speaker 2

Kevin and I all these episodes, emile and I, you know fitness streak with each other, keeping each other accountable. It's way better the finance thing that we went through today, kev we're keeping each other accountable. I'm gonna spend less money on things that are needless, and so are you, because we don't wanna let each other down. Better together is the way, and accountability is something that is so, so, so powerful. So, if you want more, accountability is something that is so so, so powerful. So if you want more accountability, business coaching, sign up for a free half hour session. I'll let you know what it's like. And if you say you know what, not for me, all good, but I'll take you through the system. I'll take you through PPT, I'll take you through habit tracking, which is PPT. I'll take you through the whole thing and I'll just be in your corner holding.

Speaker 1

Be in your corner holding you accountable to keeping the small promises you make to yourself and improving along the way, and you will blow your own mind over time with what you're capable of. As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you, and at nlu we don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow keep those principles.

Speaker 2

Next level nation.