Next Level University

#1631 - Emily Is Going To Win And Here’s Why…

• Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros

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In this episode, Kevin Palmieri and Alan Lazaros explore the realms of success and self-improvement with the success stories of two phenomenal individuals, Emily and Emilia. The discussion delves deep into the attributes that set apart the successful from the crowd and focuses on determination, self-reliance, and the importance of growth-oriented actions.

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Show notes:
(2:26) Humble, Secure, Confident, Consistent
(5:01) Awareness loop
(9:24) Deeper understanding
(10:29) At NLU, we want you to win! So, we're giving you the tools and resources to ensure your success. Join our Monthly Meetup every first Thursday of the month at 6 PM. https://www.nextleveluniverse.com/monthly-meetups/
(11:40) Strategic goal alignment
(12:39) Developing traits
(14:07) Egg-ceptional collaborators
(17:20) Reliable game-changer
(19:22) Outro

Send a text to Kevin and Alan!

Kevin:

Next level nation. Welcome back to another episode of next level university, where we help you level up your life, your love, your health and your wealth. We hope you enjoyed yesterday's episode episode number 1630 the importance of understanding your feedback language. Today, for episode number 1631, emily is going to win and here's why we have a client over at next level podcast solutions and Many of our clients we produce their shows. We have other clients, we produce their shows and we do their social media and we have some clients that I just do Coaching with. So we'll meet once a month. We'll meet every other week, we'll meet as needed and just catch up, and Emily is either every other week or once a month, depending on what's going on, and I saw her on my calendar for Wednesday or Tuesday, whatever it was, and I always get so excited when I'm talking to her Because Emily is going to win For sure. She wins it almost everything she does, and there's there's Hidden lessons underneath that that you might not get to see if you didn't get to coach this person, if you didn't get to Ask questions to this person.

Kevin:

So here's why Alan asked me. He said why is Emily gonna win? What is it about Emily? And I said she. Every single time we come, she has a list of questions. So every time, every single time we show up on zoom together, she has a list of questions and she just hammers them off. All right, kev, first question is blink, and then we just hammer through questions. It's the hour goes by so fast, it's amazing. This is what I boiled it down to, if I could just put it into one sentence.

Kevin:

She is humble enough to ask, she is secure enough to receive the answer and she is confident enough To know. When she knows there are some questions, she'll ask me and I'll say Emily, you know the answer to that, don't? You? Don't have to ask me that. You know the answer to that, you're good, don't worry about that, that's not. You're good, you're on the right track, you're good. There are other questions that she'll Feel like she has no answer to and I'll give her a new answer she has no answer to and I'll give her a new distinction, or I'll give her a new Olive branch and she's humble enough to say, wow, that's really helpful. I'm gonna do that. But it always comes from a place of humility, of I'm here to learn and I'm willing to ask questions that might? I might know the answer to. I just want a different perspective.

Kevin:

And then she's really good at taking action. She's really good at Taking the top five things she learned, turning them into action items and then between now and the next time we see each other, she'll go work on those action items. It's almost like we never talk about the same stuff. Every coaching call is kind of like an episode where there's overlap, but we almost never talk about it. We'll, we'll flash back to it, like I remember we talked about that last time, but it's never. We don't use more than five minutes for something we talked about About five weeks ago, and I think that's a really important thing.

Kevin:

She takes the knowledge whatever we're learning, whatever I'm teaching her for lack of better phrasing, becomes a new Foundation that she can build something on. And then between the time we just spoke and next time, she built something and she now she has another floor on her building. So the next time we talk we're not building from the floor we were at before, we're building on the next floor, because between the last time we talked and now she's worked on the on the building for lack of better phrasing. And I think that's how you get momentum. New awareness becomes a new opportunity, new opportunity becomes New strategy, a new strategy becomes a new action and then a new action creates a new opportunity, and then just rinse and repeat that for as long as humanly possible.

Kevin:

She's also very consistent. She's very, very consistent human being as well. Those are the things that really boiled down for me humble enough to ask, secure enough to receive the answer, confident enough to know what she really knows, and consistent enough to take action on a regular basis, where she's always kind of speeding up. She's always on the outer edge of. This is what I know, this is what I can handle. She's always right there. Maybe a good analogy, for it would be by the time her and I meet next, it's almost like she'll be quote unquote out of fuel and she just needs a refuel and then she's off to the races again. It's kind of that. And again, if we didn't meet, she's still crush what she's crushing. But just as an analogy, it's like a pit stop.

Kevin:

It's like a pit stop. Yes, the movie for Alan's Pit Stop Coaching. Okay, got to kind of ring to it Alan's. Well, alan's, we'll do it. You do it For you. I don't know, I bet you would, you came up with Okay.

Alan:

Well, in a race you do a pit stop, change the tires or whatever, I don't know.

Kevin:

You do In some races, yeah.

Alan:

That's what coaching can be like. And if you don't do a pit stop you know cars better than I do what would happen?

Kevin:

Many bad things would happen. You'd run out of fuel, your tires would and again, I don't know much about racing, but yeah, not good things your tires would blow up, you'd run out of gas, your car might overheat, you might fall asleep, whatever. It's a good analogy, who knows? I think it's a good analogy because the thing is she's going to win, with or without me.

Alan:

But not as fast.

Kevin:

It's not that I'm not as fast and yes, yes, but I don't want to make it seem like I'm the reason she's going to win. If you noticed I wasn't in there. It will help, it can help amplify, but I think these are some characteristics. These are some characteristics that you probably find across a bunch of people that are doing really well. It's that balance of the humility to say, hey, I'd love to ask you a question, with the comfort and certainty and security in yourself to receive the answer, even if it's something different than you expected. Then the ability just to take feedback and then turn that into action. I'll never forget this was one of the wildest times. We didn't give a speech, we did a Q&A, a live Q&A on stage.

Kevin:

Evan Carmichael was the headliner of that event. We went to Toronto, we interviewed Evan and then we said, hey, can you come speak at this event we're co-hosting? That night we went to dinner with everybody from the event and Evan was like, hey, you guys, your YouTube channel kind of blows. You need to do your thumbnails, you need to do all this stuff. That night I told Alan, I said we need to do the thumbnails tonight. He's like Evan's not going to remember. I said Evan's going to remember. I know he is. I'm like Evan, he's going to remember and he's going to ask us tomorrow when we see him and we're not going to have him done. He's going to shame us, not really.

Alan:

We didn't end up doing it.

Kevin:

The first question he asked the next day was how the thumbnails go. I said shit, didn't do them.

Alan:

That was back when I didn't know the difference. I didn't understand to this extent the difference between you and I and the difference between the types of people in the world.

Kevin:

I didn't understand.

Alan:

I guess I'm saying you know so much, I didn't understand Evan back then.

Kevin:

Well, we didn't know what we were.

Alan:

He's a extremely present, action oriented tactician.

Kevin:

Which I definitely resonated with at the time because I was doing all the stuff. For me, it was like he gave us a cheat code. We didn't do it. What he was looking at was I gave you the action and you didn't take it. That's all he saw. I gave you the action and you didn't take it, which is one of the things we're talking about here. How quickly can you implement it?

Alan:

Yeah, I was used to coaches and mentors that were much more philosophical, long term thinkers who. We've had one mentor who said that doesn't even matter, thumbnails don't even matter, don't worry about thumbnails, that's not the issue. Thumbnail is very technical of thumbnails. Change this title, do this. You need kind of both. I never realized that you do need both. You need a deeper understanding. You do. Of course, if you don't understand how podcasting works and what a through line is and how to create a story arc, get it Okay. I think the deeper understanding is the why and then the how is the tactical stuff. But to your original point.

Alan:

She's coming to you with questions, you're giving her answers, she's going off and Accelerating her growth and I want to make this clear, of course, because I always want to go to deeper understanding. You open this episode. Kev with Emily, is gonna win. I think we should define what winning actually means in this context, because I Don't want to geek out about game theory, but Winning is a word that I don't think resonates with people Fully, because what does that even mean? Because you can win one basketball game, but does that mean you're a winner? And, and Just to be brief about the game theory thing, there's infinite games and finite games. So Kevin and I, creating a podcast that brings holistic self-improvement to a multitude, that's kind of an infinite game that never really ends. It's a mountain you climb that has no top, but this episode is a finite game within that. So did we win in this episode? I Mean that's the philosophical discussion. So what is winning mean in this context?

Kevin:

accomplishing, accomplishing the short-term and mid-term goals that will help her accomplish her long-term goals, is what I would say. Yeah, it's. It's Aligning the reality with what her goals are in terms of metrics and number of lessons and number of dollars made. It's, it's you. I'm sure you've had these calls before, but maybe not. I don't know. I don't want to assume, but I said you're way ahead. We went and looked. I said there's a I mean there's a chance that you're on the top charts in Podcast land. She said what do you mean? I said you might be on the Apple's top charts and she said no, there's no way. And I went she's in, I don't know, number 80 or something. Yes, you have a top 100 podcast. Right now, as this moment, this very moment you and I are speaking, you were on the charts and somebody can go find you. Yes, you're ahead of where you think you are. You're ahead, believe it or not? Nice. So if anything, can we talk about why I think her gonna win?

Alan:

underneath it. I know you you already did, but what are the?

Alan:

First and foremost, growth mindset. Here for all the listeners, these are character traits that anyone can work on. I Don't think anyone can fully change themselves and I think it's a duality. I don't think the duality is I can change Skills, I can change character traits, I can change habits, I can change parts of me. But I Do also agree that all of us are kind of who we are simultaneously. That's a whole another episode. But In the context of this conversation, kev, she's gonna win. Aka, she's going to achieve the goals she wants to achieve. What character traits? What skills Like? Why? Because this is a discussion I always want to have, because it's so obvious. I always say Emilia will win at everything. No matter what she does, she finds a way to succeed. But there's a reason for that. It's not like she's just born gifted, although I do think she's also gifted. And so how do we, how do we eliminate the gifted part of the equation and help people with the part that they can also?

Kevin:

implement. I think that's the trillion dollar question. The first thing that popped into my mind is she's very self-reliant. And then I had an analogy that popped into my again. It's always a risk because I don't know how it's going to come out. There are some people that if I said I have an egg that I need you to protect for a week just a week I'm going to give you an egg and it's your job to protect the egg. There are some people I wouldn't trust to do that. The egg would end up broken for sure. It's just. You're not that responsible. It's not going to be a focus. You're not really that committed. There's other people that I would give it to and not. If I gave you an egg, I wouldn't be worried it would get broken. I know it would be fine 100% of the time.

Alan:

I would practice this journey.

Kevin:

I know you really, you really wouldn't, it would be safe.

Kevin:

Okay. Then there's people who not only would I trust them with the egg, but I also know they'd find a way to improve the egg between the time I saw them and the time I saw them next. And then there's probably just layers and layers. Eventually there's somebody who, if the egg was to hatch when I wasn't around, they'd find a way to make sure everything was fine. I think those are the type of people that ultimately get the level of success, because it's not you don't need someone else, but it's a very good compliment to work with someone, because they allow you to accelerate faster but not move. You're already going to move without them, but you can accelerate faster with them. That the ability to build momentum in your own land and then use other opportunities, other avenues, other people, other perspectives to speed up the acceleration of that. Whatever that is. And then the I do have to go here in a minute because I have a call.

Alan:

The other question underneath that is how did she become the type of person who not only can protect the egg but also improve the egg, and when the egg hatches, she also creates a litter of chickens and then has more eggs and then sells the eggs. This is a great analogy, great. It's not a great analogy, it's a decent analogy. Sorry, how dare you I need to be truthful.

Alan:

It was a decent analogy. The point is, the point is how did she become the type of person who is like that? And what is the people that you would never trust with the egg? What do they do Like? How do they become like her if they want to be successful? That's the constant question, and I know some of them won't. I know some people won't. It is what it is. Are some people naturally irresponsible? I don't know.

Kevin:

I don't know either. The other hard, the hardest part about it is it's a unique. It's in a unique piece of time where, if we were having this conversation eight years ago, I would be the person you wouldn't give the egg to. Well, that's my point.

Alan:

But now I'm how do we make help people become the type of person who people give eggs to?

Kevin:

You train, you train on your own to make sure you get food for ages, that you grow your egg and then hopefully, eventually, when someone gives you an opportunity, their egg is smaller than yours, so it's easier to do that. If I can lift, if I can hold the weight of what we're doing, and then somebody comes to me and says, hey, can you help me with blank, it's like, yeah, of course I can. That's not that hard compared to yeah, I did that five years ago, and when I did it five years ago it was the hardest thing. But now I'm five years later and it's not that big of a deal anymore.

Alan:

Yeah, it's like the best player in the field. You trust them to take the winning shot because they've they've proven it Over time.

Alan:

Yeah how do you become the guy or the girl that people want to pass the ball to when, when the game's on the line? And that's, I think, a great question to constantly be contemplating, because One of the struggles I have go quick, quick. I know we got to go Business coaching. I I can protect the egg and I can grow the egg and I can flourish, but but it doesn't look like it as much because this industry is very different than other businesses. And so how do you become the type of person that builds Self-reliance and self-trust? But other people start to trust too, because they know that everything wins in your corner.

Alan:

That's the way I would describe Emilia. Everyone in her corner wins. Her clients are all just flourishing. Whenever a client she's got a new raise, it's this whole thing, it's awesome. One of the one of the companies that she coaches, the company pays for the person personal development and they emailed her saying, whatever you're doing, just keep it up, because this, this person, this team member, is just crushing it. New office, all this amazing stuff. So everyone in Emilia's corner wins and I think it's because she just facilitates that type of responsibility and growth and everybody. But it's also uncomfortable to be around her Because of the constant feedback which goes to episode that we did yesterday. Yeah, it's.

Kevin:

There's again. We can do a part two on it at some point. There's a lot of stuff, but that really is the best. I think that's the best example. It's just very self-reliant. If you know it, you do it. If you don't know it, you figure out how to do it and then you do it, and then you just rinse and repeat that forever. That, I think that would be it in the simplest form. Okay, I gotta go, because I have a coaching call in one minute tomorrow for episode number 1632. I don't know what we're doing because I didn't have time to come up with a topic. It's gonna be fire, though Maybe the best episode you've ever heard could be the worst episode you've ever heard. As always, we love you, we appreciate you, grateful for each and every one of you and an NLU. We don't have fans, we have family. We will talk to you all tomorrow protect the egg next of a nation.

Kevin:

I'm gonna find a way to turn that into the best analogy ever of all time.

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Alan Lazaros

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Kevin Palmieri

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