Mastering Emotions for Success Lessons from Inside Out 2

In this thought-provoking episode, Justin dives into the world of emotions through the lens of the movie "Inside Out 2". Discover how understanding and mastering your emotions can lead to greater success and fulfillment in both personal and professional life. Justin explores the importance of knowing yourself and others, and how emotions like joy, anger, fear, and anxiety shape our actions and beliefs.

Key Takeaways:

• The role of emotions in creating a sense of self.
• How different emotions influence our decision-making and behavior.
• The importance of balancing emotions for a healthy and fulfilling life.
• Insights into managing emotions for better relationships and success.

Join Justin as he shares personal anecdotes, highlights from the movie, and practical tips on harnessing the power of emotions to transform your life. Don't miss this enlightening episode!

Overcome the daily grind with transformative techniques from Justin's book, 'Engineered to Love.'

These practices aren't just about finding peace—they're about reconnecting with yourself and the world around you in meaningful ways.

Access your free materials today at engineeredtolove.com/sample and start living a life filled with joy, ease, and love. 

Watch the full video episode at Justin Wenck, Ph.D. YouTube Channel!

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

I recently saw Inside Out 2. So how we humans work and operate, how beliefs create a sense of self, that you have enough beliefs about who we are, what we're all about, how the world operates, and then a sense of self begins to develop. If you have an idea of what your sense of self is and the beliefs that are operating and what that enables which emotions to come up and be in charge of your control center, probably you're gonna have some idea like why your life is the way it is, and if you can do that for yourself, you can probably also do it for other people. Are you ready to live a life with enough time, money and energy, have relationships and connections that delight you? Are you ready for the extraordinary life you know you've been missing? If so, then this is the place for you.

Speaker 1: 0:49

I'm a best-selling author, coach, consultant and speaker who's worked in technology for over two decades. I'm a leader at transforming people and organizations from operating in fear, obligation and guilt to running off joy, ease and love. It's time for Engineering Emotions and Energy with me, justin Wink, phd. All right, today I'm talking about knowing yourself and knowing others for fulfillment and success through the lens of the movie Inside Out 2. That's right, I recently saw Inside Out 2, so that maybe you don't have to, but I would highly recommend you do, because this is probably one of the best movies out there to bring you success in your business life and your personal life. So that's what I'm going to be talking about today, because there's so much in here that'll give insights into, like, how you're living your life and maybe, even more importantly, to understanding how other people are living theirs, so then you can maybe better work with them and yourself and have the life that you're meant to have.

Speaker 1: 2:04

So, before we get into that, just kind of want to you know how you been, what's been going on, how's summer so far? Because if you're watching this just as it's coming out, it is early July, the 4th of July holiday in the US has finished up, and so summer is definitely happening. How's your summer been? Is it what you've been expecting it to be? Are you finding ways to relax or get some adventure or try something new? Let me know, definitely. Look me up, let me know what's going on and, if not, it's not too late. This season is still going on and to my Australian listeners down there, I know that it's wintertime. Wintertime is also a good time to maybe do something new, a little different, you know, get into some snow or get into something else, or just get into yourself. So, wherever you are, whatever you're doing, that was a great time to check in and go.

Speaker 1: 2:55

Am I where I want to be? Because I was recently somewhere where I thought I wanted to be there but turned out I'm like, yeah, I don't think this is really where I want to be for too long. So I live, as many of you know, I live right on the coast of the Pacific Ocean, just south of San Francisco. I can see the ocean from where I'm recording this right now If I had my blinds open, which I don't, because the sun just comes in and it really fucks up with the shadows and stuff on my face. So for you, so that you get the best, the best appearance and you get me undistracted, I am blocking off a fabulous view. That's how much I care about you, my beautiful, beautiful listening audience, my listener, my loyal listener that I'm so grateful for. Thank you, my listener, my loyal listener that I'm so grateful for, thank you. So it's usually really, really cool out here.

Speaker 1: 3:54

I wanted to go out to the inland area to go check out some water and some old friends and some new friends. So I made the trek inland just before 4th of July. I thought I'd spend all of 4th of July out in this area. And as I'm going out there, driving, I see that the temperature gauge on my car is gradually increasing as I get further and further away from the coast. You know, it starts at around 70 degrees and then it's like 80, 89, 95, 99. Holy shit, 106, wait, 111. And it topped out at 113 fucking degrees. I didn't know that my thermometer in my car went that high. I don't think I'd seen that before. So it was so hot. It was one of those where it was so different than what I was used to that it was just kind of like I don't even register. This is bad, bad, this is just different, this is just interesting. Yet after spending one day out there, I was kind of like, hey, enough of this, I'm ready to go back to where I live.

Speaker 1: 4:56

There's a reason why I chose to live where I live because I enjoy it. I enjoy the sights, I enjoy the temperature, I enjoy the weather, enjoy the sites, I enjoy the temperature, I enjoy the weather and you know so, within about an hour and a half I go from. You know this area where, again, I was up to about 111 when I left and when I got back it was, I think, 66 degrees, I think. On my social media you can probably see I'll get some pictures posted of those different temperatures the 113 versus the 66 degrees all within a one and a half hours drive. And the reason I tell you this is because often we think we are so far from big differences in our life. But really it can be maybe as little as an hour and a half worth of journey, worth of effort, right, and that can have a dramatic difference in the life we're going to experience. Because in an hour and a half, like I, can prepare and record a podcast episode, you could write a chapter in a book, you could come up with a performance. There's so many things that you can do in an hour and a half that could have just as big a difference in some other part of your life as this hour and a half drive had in the temperature I was experienced. So that's the reason why I tell you this.

Speaker 1: 6:08

Is not because, like you know, just to make you jealous Although I'd really like to make you jealous in a good way that maybe you go like shit. Why am I? Why am I somewhere that I don't enjoy, that I? That doesn't delight me Because, let's I mean, let's face it there's going to be some things with wherever you live that are like going to be less than ideal. That's part of it. Like, for example, like my, where I am, it's middle of summer, it rains, it's foggy, it's cold, that happens. But then on the days where it's crazy hot other parts, just you know, 15 minutes away from me, it's the most delightful, beautiful. It's sunny, calm, gorgeous, and I don't mind the cold and the fog. To me it's a great trade-off.

Speaker 1: 6:50

The question is, where are you at in terms of your weather, but also other aspects of your life? Because the weather maybe is just a little bit an indicator of how we're feeling about other parts of our life. If you're not happy with the weather where you live, I'm guessing maybe you're not so happy with other parts and you're just putting up with it. Maybe you're just being resilient and maybe it's time to stop being so resilient and to start doing something differently. Is it more skill? No, it is actually our emotions, and that is the topic of today is emotions, because that is who the stars of the show in the movie Inside Out to emotions are the stars. That's the important thing. So if you haven't seen Inside Out one, I'm not going to recap it totally, but Pixar movie from quite a while ago, and that's also a phenomenal movie.

Speaker 1: 7:46

But this second one I would highly suggest it to anybody who's in business, to anybody who has relationships, to anybody who is a human that has emotions, because this is by far probably the funnest, most enjoyable and yet most easiest to understand how we humans work and operate. Because basically the premise is that we're getting to see inside the mind of this main character, riley, who in this movie is now a tween, like going from junior high into high school, the ninth grade, and so basically you know the movie starts out where just things are doing so well thanks to how things ended up after the first movie. So in the first movie we get introduced to these five key emotions sadness, fear, anger, disgust and joy. And these emotions are basically in the control center of the mind, which in the movie is shown as kind of like a literal command center where they have buttons and things and so, depending on which emotion is in command the and the person this Riley character does different things right. So it's like if fear gets in charge, it's like, ah, I want to get out of here, let's run away. Anger's there. Then an anger's like oh, we're going to fuck this shit up, we're going to mow them down and let's yell at them. But if joy is just like yay, this is great, what a fantastic experience. And we find at the beginning of this movie, effectively, joy is the leader of the group, joy is in charge of, of the command center. Most often than not it's every now and then the other emotions, you know, have a little bit to say, but mostly joy is in charge, and if anything isn't in line with what joy wants, then anything that is not that gets kicked off to the subconscious.

Speaker 1: 10:42

And what's really great is that this movie kind of shows that, how beliefs create a sense of self, that you have enough beliefs about, you know who we are, what we're all about, how the world operates, and then a sense of self begins to develop. And in this, the beginning, the sense of self that is developed is I'm a good person. Isn't that beautiful? Things are great, going along Like what could go wrong. And then, oh, what happens. What happens, you know, around that age of 12 ish, whatever right, puberty, so puberty comes, and what happens? Oh, a whole new group of emotions starts to move into the command center. So we get to meet on we, we which is basically kind of like a boredom slash, tiredness, just like uh, uh, uh, um, maybe those of you that have teens or remember being a teen or just even remember the pandemic you probably experienced, some on we of just like, oh, what is this? Does this even matter? So you got on, we got embarrassment, there's envy, and then the big, the big new rival.

Speaker 1: 11:49

Emotion is anxiety, and anxiety is just like, hey, we got to worry about everything because you know, we have a, an 18 year plan and if we're not doing every little thing the way we're supposed to, then we are going to be out on the streets. Life is horrible, things are going to be totally fucked up, and so anxiety will do whatever it takes to get what anxiety knows is the right thing to do. And who gets kicked out? The original emotions, that they get kicked out, along with that sense of self that I'm a good person. And now anxiety is in charge and is creating a new sense of self. And what starts to take root with anxiety and charge this sense of self of I'm not good enough. Now the big question is, with our original emotions, joy and uncharged being kicked out and this new sense of self is Riley, doomed to just be perpetually like, ah, the sense of anxiety and not good enough, and doing all these things probably messing up and just being paying the SB around. Or will our, will our friends, our original emotions be able to come back and reconcile and will it be a way that all the emotions can work together so that there can be as healthy sense of self?

Speaker 1: 12:59

I'm not going to spoil the movie, but it is very enjoyable, very fun, very funny and then very enlightening about how emotions have these interplays within our control system and dictate what we do. And we also see how some of the other characters, the parents, they have their control centers and how their emotions operate differently and are in charge at different times. And why is this so important and why? Why is this so important? Because if you have an idea of what your sense of self is and the beliefs that are operating and what that enables which emotions to come up and be in charge of your control center. Probably you're going to have some idea like why your life is the way it is, and if you can do that for yourself, you can probably also do it for other people. And then it's going to make more sense of like oh, why is this person behaving? Like? Ah, their sense of envy is probably kicked in and that's why they're trying to do all of these things to get what I have, because the envy's kicked in or whatever the emotion is. So it really is just this great metaphor to be able to figure out, like, what's going on and what's in control.

Speaker 1: 14:01

And so often we like to think like, oh, I just do the rational thing, I'm doing what makes sense based off of you know the data that's coming into my life and you know those that are in the tech space, that are professionals, that are in business, biggest of like oh, data driven. And I'm going to be honest, if you think that you're doing what the data is telling you, you're completely deceiving yourself, because you choose what data you value and that is an emotional decision. There is an emotion that is going like yeah, I'm going to listen to this data. I'm going to listen to this piece of information, which is why, especially as you know, election time in the US is starting to kick up more and more and more and you try to talk to somebody on the other side and you're just like how come they're not listening to reason? How come they're not listening to reason? I just saw a post on Facebook where somebody was like oh, a friend of mine, they just told me who they were voting for and they just won't be persuaded.

Speaker 1: 15:01

It's because it's not about the facts, it's about the emotions. And the sooner you understand you're working with the emotions, that that's who you're actually working with and it's not the facts, the sooner you could actually maybe find ways to allow in more information, because maybe they can allow sort of a balance of these emotions and allow more in and then get to a place of like commonality and then maybe there can be a shift in like what information people allow in. And so, whether you're you know this is not about politics, although it is, but it's also about business it's also about your relationships, because if you're not speaking to what emotion is in charge and speaking that language and then maybe allowing for a shift or a change in that emotion to something that maybe allows for some more rationality, then what you're? That? That emotion is just going to entrench and just be more and more powerful and nothing is going to change. And this goes for yourself as well, sort of the more you don't understand what emotion is operating at this point, then you're not going to actually be able to change, maybe, your beliefs, you're not going to be able to change that sense of self to live the life that you really want. And you know what's the life that you really want. That's a whole other topic.

Speaker 1: 16:19

But just knowing, just having this awareness of who's in charge emotionally speaking, is so huge. It's huge. I can't underline how important this is. To know. Like is you know? Are you in a state of anger? Are you in a state of fear? Are you in a state of embarrassment? Because if you're aware of these, then you can work with that. You can go like, ah, this is what is. This is how I am right now, because if you're not able to know where you are and accept that, then as much as you might be like, ah, I want to be feeling so amazing, I want to be happy and I want to have all of this financial success. I want to be happy and I want to have all of this financial success. But if you don't know that, you're just in the fit of like pure anger, just pure anger and frustration, then you're not able to actually get to it because you don't know which direction to go in. Because if you don't know where you are, even if you have some idea of where you want to go, the route you're going to take is going to be completely wrong and likely to take you off course. That's why I highly recommend Inside Out 2. It doesn't matter if you have kids. Don't have kids are a kid, are an adult. I would recommend it.

Speaker 1: 17:38

I went and saw it. You know it was a little bit like I'm doing research, you know, for this, for the show, but it's just a great movie. You're gonna have a good time. Probably the funnest, most enjoyable way that you can actually enjoy what learning about yourself, learning about other people, and the more you know yourself, the more you know others, the more you can be successful while being fulfilled.

Speaker 1: 18:02

Because if you're just focused on success and just checking things off and you're ignoring the emotionality that's effectively like letting anxiety rule then that's going to be doing things that are not going to be serving you, not going to be serving those around you and you're not going to be able to have, uh, be empathetic with other people. So this movie really is a great tool to understand, to kick in that empathizing ability muscle that can be strengthened. Sometimes some people are better talented than others. I'm I'm very empathetic. Better talented than others. I'm I'm very empathetic. Um, I'm also incredibly humble. I'm the most humble person. Uh, that is around actually. Um, that's a, that's a joke, um, um, yeah, so I'd highly recommend the movie.

Speaker 1: 18:53

Uh, it's got great drama with great information and, um, there's one, one emotion who keeps trying to pop up, but they're like, no, not yet it's too soon, and that is uh, nostalgia, which I know, I know, I notice comes up more and more where it's like I remember when there's a great south park episode called the member berries, and this is effectively why so much of our entertainment is based off of old shit that keeps getting remade over and over again, because, as people like the stuff that they liked when they were younger, cause they know it and they remember maybe the good times, or they just remember that they remember it and it's just. I remember when this happened. I remember when we were friends with this. I remember when I saw the song and they're just like no, no, it's too. It's too early to get into nostalgia, because if you're in nostalgia that means you're not in the now and you're not, you're not creating the future that you want to be creating. So, um, not to say that nostalgia is totally bad, irrelevant, but I did think it was kind of a funny play on, like hey, you don't want to get too too in nostalgia too soon. It is something. And ultimately it's about finding a balance of the emotions. It's not about favoring one over the other. It's about recognizing that they all have a place to play in operating our life. And when we allow that and sort of allow an intelligent utilization of all of the emotions and don't try to get rid of one or overly weight another, that is when we are in the flow of an amazing, enjoyable human experience. So with that I'm going to wrap this one up. It was a great movie.

Speaker 1: 20:40

Inside Out 2. I highly recommend it because it really is just. I feel like it's just a very human story, because sometimes there can be you go to a Disney movie lately and sometimes it's kind of like is it going to be a good story or is there just going to be some messaging or something? Or are they just changing things just to change things? This I felt like it's just a great movie, great story. I feel like it could probably appeal to anybody, and maybe that's I'm biased, because I felt like they made this movie especially for me.

Speaker 1: 21:16

There's a little bit where I was like I'm like oh my gosh, this, the story of the main character, feels like my, my emotional arc as a human. So I might I might have to contact a lawyer to see if I need to sue them. Maybe maybe they got my book and they took some of the stories out there and some of the things like that, and you know they're just like oh well, just instead of. You know, the main character is Justin, we're just going to change it to Riley and he won't and Justin won't notice. So I'm going to have to investigate that.

Speaker 1: 21:44

But I do believe that this really is a human story that anybody can relate to, and even if you're like, oh, I don't think I've ever experienced anxiety. I don't think I've ever experienced joy being overwhelming in my life at any point. Just think that it could be any one of these emotions and that, if it's not necessarily, this might not be your story. This could be the story of somebody you care about or somebody that's important in your life, that you work with, and that that might be the key to understanding them and working with them better and being able to have a very fulfilling life relationship connection while being incredibly successful. Because that's really what I think a lot of this life thing is all about is can you be fulfilled, can you have fun, can you enjoy it while doing some amazing things for the world Right, which is going to bring in that that abundance of you know good, you know good, good salary, good income all that stuff while having good relationships and fun, amazing experiences. And it really all starts with inside. So inside out begins inside. So this is a great movie. You can go out to get an inward journey, so then your outside is going to be even more incredible. So with that I'm going to wrap this up.

Speaker 1: 23:00

So great to be connecting with you again and I'd love to hear how your summer's going. You know what's what's been great so far and what is it you're looking to still experience, right, cause I, I think this is, you know, it's a little nostalgia right, when, when it would be summer break from school and it's like, oh my gosh, I'm going to, you know, go to the pool more, I'm going to go on this trip or do this other thing. Even as adults, I think sometimes we kind of, you know, even though we might not have a summer break anymore, that can be a little bit of like, oh, I want to have a little something special for summer and I think that's okay. And so make your summer special wherever you are in the world, and let me know what that is. And if there's some way that I can assist, let me know. Maybe make it a topic of the show. Yeah, how cool would that be that you're like, oh my gosh, how do I do this? And then a couple weeks later, that's the show. You got your answer. Think about it. Think about it. If you ask, you might get it All right. So with that, thank you so much, and good day.

Speaker 1: 23:59

Thanks for tuning in to engineering emotions and energy with Justin Wink, phd. Today's episode resonated with you. Please subscribe and leave a five-star review. Your feedback not only supports the show, but also helps others find us and start their journey of emotional and energetic mastery. You can also help by sharing this podcast with someone you think will love it just as much as you do. Together, we're engineering more amazing lives.