Creating the Sacred Space for Purpose, Peace & Fulfillment in the New Year

Happy New Year! 

I hope you all had a blessed, safe and joyful holiday season with loved ones.

I wanted to start off this new year with positivity, purpose and connection, especially connecting to the areas in our lives that bring us harmony, ease and fulfillment.

So often we go day-by-day without giving time and attention to the areas in our lives that feed our soul. Especially the time we make for our horses. They feed our souls for sure and often we feel frustrated and disappointed in the fact that we never have enough time for them, let alone for ourselves and others.

 Well, not anymore! I’m going to share some tips and secrets to keeping my emotional reservoir feeling full and not empty, and how you can feel amazing in 15 minutes or less with your horse.

Transcript

Caroline Beste (42s):
you are listening to Everything Horses& More! Podcast with me, your host, Caroline Beste. I'm the founder of my Tao of Horsemanship method, a pioneer in horse training and development and a true advocate of the horse. I bring an intuitive and educated eye along with an experienced and intelligent perspective to understanding both horse and human nature and behavior.

Caroline Beste (1m 29s):
My experience in skillsets are the cornerstone to my worldwide success in training methodology. My experience with horses as intelligent sentient beings is what inspired me to create my highly acclaimed and proven training method. Consensual Partnership Training for horses and humans. A model I pioneered in 2008. Consensual Partnership Training provides a comprehensive and impressive curriculum teaching horse owners how to fully develop their horses using a holistic, empathetic, and natural process. My training system teaches you how to achieve true partnership with horses and without the use of pain, excessive pressure, dominance, force or coercion.

Caroline Beste (2m 9s):
In addition to being a world-class trainer for both horses and people, I'm an artist, author, entrepreneur, speaker, radio show host, licensed working equitation trainer and riding foundation specialist. I offer one of the largest and most comprehensive online educational platforms, the do of horsemanship, where I host a variety of courses produced and personally taught by me and my amazing school masters. In addition to sharing what I know in my in-person training and online courses, I invite special guests and students each month to my radio show, everything, horses and More podcast. This platform allows us to engage with all of you and share our very personal and transformational journey with horses.

Caroline Beste (2m 53s):
I invite you to listen in and hope you find something that helps inspire you to reach your personal goals and aspirations with your horse. Thank you. And may you always be one with horses. Welcome back everybody. Happy New Year. Welcome back to Everything, horses and More podcast.

Caroline Beste (3m 34s):
You know who my lovely co-host is? Lydia Primavera. And y'all know who I am, Caroline Best. So welcome back to Everything Horses and more where we are educating, liberating and inspiring horse owners around the world. And happy, happy New Year. Yay. So we're excited Lydia and me about today's podcast title and we've had quite a few people reach out to express their excitement last year. This time last year I did a, you know, welcome New Year podcast and I think it's just great to start the new year off with something, oh, that not only feeds our soul hopefully, but gives us some inspiration, inspiration and motivation to say the least.

Caroline Beste (4m 30s):
First I wanna mention our last podcast of the year in December, December 14th, 2022. If you all did not listen, please listen in cuz it's a great segue to today's podcast. And we did stream it live. We will continue doing our podcast, streaming them live to our YouTube channel. So it was with Chris Newkirk, our guest speaker, and she was retiring and her, our title for that podcast in December was working on our higher true self to bring calm confidence and peace within, especially around the holidays. So Chris is a master psychiatrist, psychologist with a concentration on women empowerment in spirituality and addiction.

Caroline Beste (5m 20s):
And she has since retired, but we will have her back as often as she will come because she is just a wealth of information, education, knowledge, spirituality, you know, as often as she can come back that I'm looking forward to that this year. So take a peek at that podcast if you haven't already. And today we're talking about creating this sacred space for purpose, peace, and fulfillment in the new year. And for me, I don't know about all of you guys, but one of it really annoys me personally when everybody's out there and I've gotten caught up in that, in this too with my promotions and I think I did it last year as well, but just like, let's make our New Year's resolutions and you know, let's stick to 'em.

Caroline Beste (6m 12s):
And, and it's, we all know how challenging that is, you know, it's like you have all the, the good intentions in the world to, to make the change. But making the change is the difficult part. You know, changing habits and, and cognitive patterns of recognition. And, and so I hope today's podcast, my, what I did is I, I wanted to really break down this topic and into very easy digestible pieces that we, I have a whole process that I live by personally and, and I've used it to bring me fulfillment, contentment, peace and wellbeing.

Caroline Beste (6m 58s):
And I've als I also continue to use this process when I'm stressed and anxious and I am the perfect candidate over the holidays. I had one of the most stressful holidays, not one of the most be besides my first marriage divorce in starting this business and not having any money and moving this Christmas was very stressful. And I really had to step back and practice what I preach because like all of us, like you guys, you know, it's easy to, to do something, to try something for a while and then if it doesn't become an ingrained habit, your your mind just tells you, ah, I got this, you know, and then you get, you deviate and you get, you know, challenged or caught up in the craziness again.

Caroline Beste (7m 53s):
And, and it hasn't become a habit. And then you get back in that cycle. And so I am really good about habits, but, but I really needed to anchor myself this Christmas. And my mom is living with me right now. She came for a visit the first part of December and she's not been healthy and she ended up, her health declined rapidly and she ended up having emergency surgery before Christmas. She has congestive heart failure, so she had an a flu ablation. I won't get into it, but then it's the whole process of, you know, it's right before Christmas, spending every day traveling to go see her, including Christmas and trying to maintain a semblance of calm.

Caroline Beste (8m 44s):
And, and you know, Harry, do you enjoy your Christmas when you're worried about your mom and, and trying to have, you know, function as a family and continue, you know, what you normally do. And then she, she went into one of the worst rehabilitation facilities. It was like a movie you guys, it was a nightmare. And she went in over New Year's so I couldn't get her out cuz there's no doctors around. And the place looked beautiful and it was immaculate and it had a weird vibe to it from the get go. And every nurse there was either a complete moron or a complete asshole.

Caroline Beste (9m 25s):
And I had to fight to get my mother released last Wednesday, right guys? Today, last Wednesday, I can't even keep up. Yeah, it's, it's been a whirlwind. And then trying to get social service. So she's been full-time care for me. So, you know, it's been a nightmare. So I'm, I'm working on getting, you know, social services in and some, some level of care and I'm blessed that my staffer Clarissa, who's just been amazing, who helps me five days a week here at my farm with the horses. So she's been pitching in and I'm blessed that she has the availability to be available.

Caroline Beste (10m 6s):
Thank you Clarissa. We'll get there. But, and I did have a really, a great epiphany and the whole epiphany to the madness cuz of course I'm stressed out and my my family is stressed out and yeah, everybody's worried. And my, and the worst part about my mother's health is the level of dementia that happened. And for those of you that have dealt with a, an aging parent with dementia and, and you know, it's really, it's very sad and frightening for them. It's very frightening for them. And mom definitely still has dementia. It that'll never go away, but it's not as bad as it was.

Caroline Beste (10m 48s):
So we're, we're improving a little bit. But anyway, the, the aha moment, and I'm gonna talk more about this in today's podcast because I'm, I'm here to really help you. You know, I walk the walk, I don't just talk. The talk was praying to God. And for those of you that know me, I'm spiritual and I believe in God. I believe in a higher power. I believe in God. And I went back to my roots, so to speak. Not my Catholic roots, but just my belief system and the power of prayer. And when you're at your most vulnerable and you have to surrender, you've just gotta give it up to a higher power.

Caroline Beste (11m 30s):
And I choose God, you can choose anything, I choose God. And there was a peace that came over me that was just amazing. And it didn't happen immediately that it certainly did when I woke up the next morning. And it gave me the level of clarity, calm and clarity that I needed. That which of course creates a level of assurance, you know, where you're, you're like, you know, and of course I have support from my husband, which has been amazing. We all need that, right? And you know, my stepson, his son is amazing too.

Caroline Beste (12m 10s):
So in my family. But anyway, so today, you know, happy New Year again. I hope y'all had a blessed and beautiful and safe holiday season with your loved ones. And you know, again, I wanted to start this new year off with positivity and purpose, connection to ourselves and to others and, you know, especially being able to connect to areas in our life that bring harmony, ease, peace, wellbeing. I know we all struggle with that all the time. And I hope today I can give you some concrete tangible practices.

Caroline Beste (12m 53s):
And if, if you, you know, don't get what you need in this podcast, you can always contact me for, you know, personal coaching. I do a lot of personal coaching along with my horsemanship. So, you know, as I mentioned earlier in this, when we first started the podcast, you know, everyone wants to keep their new resol, new Year's resolutions and yet it's often very difficult and impossible to, to create those habits unless you really devote yourself. And we're gonna talk about that. I think we also make too big of a deal out of it, which puts a lot of pressure on all of us.

Caroline Beste (13m 35s):
And what happens when we go into pressure like the horses, too much pressure and what happens, we go into self-preservation mode. So we either just shut down and freeze or in tune out and go in autopilot or we go into flight mode, which creates anxiety or fight mode, which for me, fight mode is just pushing through, barreling through, you know, just push, push, push. So what if we looked at it differently? What if we looked at our new year, our new opportunity, our new Year's resolutions as a new opportunity and just taking the pressure off that big piece of pressure where, you know, whether it's losing 20 pounds, whether it's getting a better different job, whether it's making more money, whether it's having better relationships, whatever that New Year's resolution is, making more time for yourself is always a big one.

Caroline Beste (14m 38s):
You know, we can put a lot of pressure on ourselves and you know, instead of stepping into the New Year's resolution with a on your mark, get set, go. Everybody wants to get us all pumped up and excited about making those New Year's resolutions. I wanna give us some stepping stones, some smaller bites and, and things that we can do that we can all incorporate and, and to our daily lives very, very easily. I think this, you know, I came up with this podcast before I was talking to my, my stepson, my son Mason, about it.

Caroline Beste (15m 22s):
And you know, we celebrated New Year's together and, and you know, the next day, you know, we all fell asleep watching the ball drop, woke up right before the ball drop. And Kurt and I had our champagne and Mason had his apple sparkling apple cider. And but the next day we did, you know, we had our big dinner and I was like, so Mason, what are your new's resolutions? And he is like, I don't know, you know, I'm 14 and I don't have any new year. I'm not thinking that far ahead, you know, 14 year old you're thinking about right then and there and 10 million different things. But it kind of hit me funny in a good way cuz I'm like, yeah, you know, seriously, what is the big deal about New Year's resolutions?

Caroline Beste (16m 2s):
A lot of it's a big gimmick marketing gimmick. If you ask me buy into this, buy into that take advantage. Just like Christmas has become a Hallmark marketing, you know, advertising, you name it, we have to be careful about the manipulation of advertising, especially on television. So there are, how do I wanna go about today is if you're thinking about a New Year's resolution and you're feeling and, and you need to tap in to how it resonates with you, when you just think about it. If you're feeling pressure or you're feeling anxious or you're not feeling good about talking about it, you're not excited, you're not motivated, you're not inspired, you need to listen to that.

Caroline Beste (16m 48s):
And so that's one of the things, first thing I wanna bring up with everybody is pay attention. You know, there's two strategies that work period in life. I use them all the time in my personal life and with my, my students, whether it's personal development and coaching or their horsemanship, especially the horsemanship too in the two strategies is learning how to do a body scan and also mind mapping. And this is where my coaching comes in. And like I said, you anyone, anywhere all over the world, you guys come contact me.

Caroline Beste (17m 28s):
You don't have to be a current student of mine in my work. You can contact me for a coaching service in regards to this. So a body scan is what I just said. When you speak or think about certain words or moments, experiences, what happens to your body? Somatically, how do you experience sensation in your body when you think about anything, whether it's positive or negative. And we'll just make it that black and white. So if you're thinking about a New Year's resolution, how do you feel? What happens in your body from the top of your head all the way down throughout your body to your feet?

Caroline Beste (18m 9s):
And this is really important. Body scanning is something that we should all be mindful of all the time, and especially in our horsemanship cuz we're bringing that container, our body as a container of emotions, stress, you know, whatever negative or positive. We're bringing that to our horses and especially if we go to ride, they can feel that, they can feel it before they touch us and we touch them, but they can obviously feel it when we get on them. So body scans are a big deal and it's part body scans are also part a way of being authentic, a way of being true to yourself about how you feel about something.

Caroline Beste (18m 52s):
Lydia, I see you are busy. So you guys know Lydia's here for taking questions too. So if anybody has anything I do, I'm looking real quick myself. Welcome everybody. And Pamela, I'm so sorry to hear that you lost your stepdad Oh, to body dementia. Hmm. And you didn't have a lot of help from the family. Aw. And you were caring for 'em, so, so sorry, sorry to hear that. Yeah, I, I'm, I feel blessed. You know, my brothers and I are on the same page and we're pretty close and mom's been living, you know, from one house to the other.

Caroline Beste (19m 35s):
But I have the best arrangement. I'm in my guest house right now, so, you know, students come to work with me, depending if it's a private work, they stay in this guest house and mom will come up to the main house. So the guest house is still available for students, but she'll be here indefinitely. So, I'm sorry for anyone else who's been struggling. So let's, let me keep focused on this. That's why I don't wanna do the comments, I shouldn't have looked because I, this is real stuff. This can really help you, you know, be, be authentic, be real, be vulnerable, be honest with yourself.

Caroline Beste (20m 20s):
If you feel a certain way, allow it. I felt horrible the night that I f and I pray, but I mean, I really prayed that night and I, I had the tears coming down my cheeks, so I was lying in bed quietly and my husband's snoring asleep and I was like, I need help. I need to have a better mindset about this. And, you know, I'm, I'm very good with my time management and organization, but this just really threw me for a loop because I have so many things business wise, you know, that I have to prioritize and mom took priority, not to mention my family and everything else.

Caroline Beste (20m 60s):
So it worked, it worked to just surrender and pray and, and give, give it up to God and just say, you've gotta show me the way, you've gotta give, you've gotta take over. I can't take over anymore. And I am, as you guys probably know, the typical personality that is, you know, strong, takes over pretty confident in most areas of my life, but definitely very vulnerable. And I have my insecurities like, like everybody else. So the body scan is huge. If you're disengaged from your body or you know, disconnected and that's some of the work I do.

Caroline Beste (21m 44s):
That's, it's a, it's a big deal. And that's a, it's a lot of what I do in, in my mastery membership program and spirituality program. So body scans are important in mind mapping and mind mapping. It might be a foreign term to a lot of you, but in coaching it is one hell of a strategy to whether you are working, you know, on your personal life, your business, your career, retirement, your horsemanship, any facet or asset of, you know, area of your life. Mind mapping can help and help you get out of a state of anxiety, feeling overwhelmed, can't focus, don't know why you feel a certain way.

Caroline Beste (22m 34s):
So those two strategies, body scan and mind mapping are amazing. And again, I don't wanna devote the whole podcast cuz that's what I do in coaching if you guys need help. So let's talk about creating a secret space. I teach a lot about this, especially working with the first four chakras and in horsemanship and in healing. And we wanna learn how to create the sacred space, learn how to hold, created and hold the space for purpose, peace and fulfillment. And as I've often mentioned in a lot of different podcasts, if we're depleted, we don't have anything to give.

Caroline Beste (23m 16s):
So creating space is an opportunity to create abundance and to create a reservoir. And so that's what I wanna talk about next. So reservoir means just what it means, you know, it is a container and again, we're talking about space and an emotional space and I like to work with the chakras because I want us to somatically experience what that feels like in our body. And then this is part of that deep connection that we create with our horses. It's just amazing cuz they're such, they're somatic, you know, we're all somatic, we're all sentient beings, therefore we can experience somatically, which means we experience through our body.

Caroline Beste (24m 4s):
And horses to me are masters at this. They have, they have taught me so much. Everything I know about this, what I'm talking about, I've learned through my horses. And so creating a space, we can create a space for anything. We can create a space for love, compassion for healing, for restoration, for restoring, for protection, for boundaries, for respect. We can create a space for anything. We just have to get the intention behind it. What's your intention? What do you need? And that's where the body scan comes in, right? Or the mind mapping. Some of us, some students come to me and they're just so depleted that they don't even know what they need.

Caroline Beste (24m 49s):
They just know that they're anxious right now and overwhelmed and, and at their, you know, at the end of the rope so to speak. So creating the space is creating that reservoir, that abundance so that you first can start to give back to yourself, which then allows you to give back to others. So creating, you know, the, the sacred space for healing, for love, for relationships, for vulnerability, for, you know, honoring ourselves, honoring others.

Caroline Beste (25m 32s):
We have to be in a position, in a mindset of intention. Like what do you want to achieve through this? You know, what is the saying, Lydia in the road was paved inten, how does that go? Road to hell. The road was paved intentions, the road to hell was paved with good intentions, right? Yeah. You know, that used to always mess with my head. I'm like, what are you mean? Intentions? Great, but intention, just like potential, potential doesn't mean squat if we don't follow through, if we don't have action.

Caroline Beste (26m 21s):
And so what is your intention? What's the one word that pops up when you do a body scan? You know, how do you feel in your body? Does it hurt? Is it angry? Is it sad? Is it happy? Does it, you know, what are those words? Words are so important because they're attached to thoughts which are attached to emotions. And this is how we start to understand how we can heal ourselves. And so when you start to create, you know, a lot of people talk about meditation, especially me. And you know, I wanna be able to flip the switch on and meditate in an instant and anywhere.

Caroline Beste (27m 9s):
And I can. And I think there, in my understanding and experience as a, as a teacher of meditation, as a student and as a teacher and also as an observer, like what do, what do I see out there? Everybody thinks that meditation, I don't think, I'm not, I don't wanna speak for everyone, but there seems like the mass majority and you all let me know that when you go to meditate, it has to be over there somewhere quiet or you have to join a group to get in the right mindset. And what I'm trying to do is help you guys realize that, that you can do all of the things I'm gonna talk about today, anywhere, anytime.

Caroline Beste (27m 51s):
You just have to set it up correctly. It does have to become a ritual. We're gonna talk about that a practice so that, so that you can turn that, turn it on anytime you can turn it on in like a dimmer switch, it can get stronger and brighter as far as how much time and energy you wanna put into it. You can dim it, relax it, and turn it back off. And it can come on immediately and it can come off your, you know, be turned off immediately too. And this is really, really important. Creating and holding the space is a huge self-respect, empowerment and boundary.

Caroline Beste (28m 35s):
How don't wanna say it, not boundary issue, but for people that have problems with boundaries and, and, and don't like confrontation or, or have a feel that if they stick up for themselves in whatever form that is, that it'll, that it will, it will create a confrontation. And so holding the space is an energetic, it's an intentional energy and it's, it's also a meditational breathing energy where we actually create that space within, within ourselves, within our body. It's a somatic experience, but first you have to think about it and then you want to experience it through your body.

Caroline Beste (29m 16s):
And so therefore it's a nonverbal confrontation. We're not here to create the space for boundaries to protect ourselves from anything in a confrontational way. We are just going to be, we're going to do it and we're going to become it. And it is powerful and it, it's no different than than me or a horse standing there and planting their feet and giving a look like you better not come near me or, or a dog or a cat in just giving you that look like I am right now or I'm serious, don't come near me. So that's an intentional thought that then our body takes that shape and that form and that energy and it is huge.

Caroline Beste (30m 3s):
The more you believe in it, the more you feel it, the more you believe in it, the more you feel it, the more you breathe into it, the more you feel it. It's, it's, it's huge. So does anybody have any questions about what I'm talking about Lydia? No,

Lydia P. (30m 29s):
Not so far.

Caroline Beste (30m 35s):
So we all have time constraints. What do, how do we create this space? And, and, and it can be anywhere. You know, when you make this practice, which I'm gonna talk about how to make this practice and how to create this somatically to feel it and it becomes so ingrained, you carry it wherever you are and you carry that space in whatever form inside of you that creating that space, the form I'm talking about is behind the intention. So if you're intention is I feel good and calm and relaxed, then the form is your body and your energy. Your body is a container of energy.

Caroline Beste (31m 16s):
So the form becomes relaxed and calm and soft. If the intention is, oh, I'm gonna protect myself right now, then creating a space form your body as a container takes on the energetic form in space, in frequency of protection of a barrier. It is that simple. You can take this, you can turn it on, wax on, wax off, turn it off, turn it up, turn it down wherever you are. And it is a nonverbal, it's not a confrontation, it is all energy and intent.

Caroline Beste (31m 56s):
Your mind is is energy too. So your thoughts are energy. So it's an intentional energy and it's a physical energy, both the physical energy in the breath work that's with inside of you, somatically what you experience and feel. And it becomes the energy frequency that you push outside of you into this imaginary kind of invisible force field. It is so powerful. And so I wanna now talk about rituals cuz that's talking about creating and holding the space, whatever space you need in that particular moment. So now we wanna talk about how do we, how do we create peace and fulfillment?

Caroline Beste (32m 40s):
And creating the space is one way to create peace definitely. And wellbeing within those feelings. So when I refer to rituals, I'm not referring to the religious ceremony at all. I'm not, I'm talking about a ceremonial act or action, which is like a series habit, habituation. It's a series of actions that you, that are regularly repeated. And so a ritual, an example I can give two examples of, of rituals.

Caroline Beste (33m 23s):
One would be the way I get up in the morning and the things that I do, and I pretty much do them in this order. Sometimes things change, but I do them in this order because it feels good and some of them feel better than others. So part of my morning ritual would be I get out of bed, I go to the bathroom, it's a need, it's not a ritual. And then I pretty much brush my hair, put my hair up in a ponytail or brush my teeth, take my vitamins and you know, do this, do that. And then I go out and make coffee for me and my husband and feed the cats.

Caroline Beste (34m 6s):
And so the first part of my ritual, which is pretty much the same every day is out of necessity, but is also, it feels good to me if I don't brush my teeth, ugh, I hate that. If I don't do X, y, and Z it just, I like that sense of order. It feels safe to me and comfortable. But the coffee and, and the cats need to be fed, but the coffee is the perk. So it's something that really gives back to me and my husband and it's, and he likes it when I make his coffee and I make it a certain way and then I bring the coffee to the couch and the table and we turn on the news and the cats join us.

Caroline Beste (34m 48s):
So it's, it's a love fest. And so there's, or when we had dogs, it was, the dogs were included. So there's that ritual which gives back to us and it's a bonding ritual for us. It's a relaxation ritual. It, it might last five minutes, it might last an hour, it just depends. But if we can just, and we do, we just make the time. It, it is so fulfilling. And if we don't make the time, we feel like we've lost something. Like we ever felt like you lost a, an earring or you can't find your ring and I don't know what to do without my jewelry on or something feels out of place. So that's just one really simple ritual that works great for us.

Caroline Beste (35m 33s):
It could be for anybody. Part of my rituals are watering my plants inside and outside tending to them. Not every day, but it's, it gives back. I mean that's something that gives back to me, gives me quiet. I like to nurture, obviously taking care of my horses is huge. So if I'm not tending to their needs in Clarissa is I definitely part of my ritual every morning is walking down the barns and saying good morning to each one and giving a kiss and just smelling them and, and just connecting for that instant and feeling that connection and feeling them, you know, they leave their food to get a kiss.

Caroline Beste (36m 20s):
It is. And to get that eyeball kiss. So that is just so I feel, I feel empty, I feel lost if I don't have that. So it's a need too. It is something that I need that gives back to me and it's something that happens quickly. I don't spend a lot of time, these things can be done quickly. Anything it's, but it's paying attention to what feeds your soul, what makes you feel good. It can be something that lasts a few seconds, many minutes, an hour, you know, so, so much of our self care now has become to me really drawn out like, oh, self-care means I have to go and get my hair done or my nails done or massage or something.

Caroline Beste (37m 6s):
That takes a lot of time when there's so many things we can do throughout our day that can be ritualistic. So like the definition of rituals, purpose creates the reason for which something is done, purpose. And that's part of that intention. Purpose creates the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. So their purpose, I purpose in my morning, my my morning, there's many things that are a part of my morning that give back to me that I feel really good about.

Caroline Beste (37m 51s):
And even if like someone wants to do those things for me, sometimes it's okay, but it really feels out of place. I really enjoy doing those. And again, it's the intention behind the action. What's your intention? Do you need to be given to or do you want to give to? So let's not exclude the feeling of peace. What does, what is that? It's a freedom from disturbance, a sense of ease, flow and tranquility. Creating rituals helps us create purpose in our intention, our actions, which in turn gives us the feeling of peace.

Caroline Beste (38m 39s):
So rituals also help children and adults become better organized with their time. It's great for time management and it's great. I think, you know, growing up with my mom, I've often been asked this question, you know, when we were growing up and it, it definitely is a generational thing too, but we enjoyed my brothers and I, we had lots of responsibilities. We come from a, you know, a lot of entrepreneurs and business owners and, and both sides of the family. We have, we had a lot of animals, we had a lot of interests and we took care of our things and we, you know, we made our bed every day. We cleaned our rooms, we helped out around the house and you know, I can't remember my mom ever getting on my case or my brothers maybe Steven A.

Caroline Beste (39m 28s):
Little bit. Steve was a little bit more of a dreamer and less organized, which is just who he is. But David and I were definitely, you know, more type A and we thrive on structure in organization and less spontaneity. Oh, I wouldn't say that. I think we have enough of it. Probably I'm the worst one with spontaneity. The, I'm the least flexible out of my, my brothers, the three of us. But the point I'm making is my mom had a great way of making chores fun and enjoyable and and satisfying and feeling like satisfied and g and that you were, you know, you were doing a good job and you were helping.

Caroline Beste (40m 18s):
And I do believe it's because it, it became like a ritual. There were just certain things that we did and she was great about, you know, positive reward, you know, praising us and it felt good. And so those chores just felt good because of the way they were set up by my mom and they became rituals, you know, got outta bed and I made my bed every morning. It didn't feel right if my bed wasn't made brushed, my teeth, nobody had to tell me to brush my teeth, you know, it just, it felt good and it, it was, it was a positivity, a positive experience.

Caroline Beste (40m 58s):
So I'm gonna have a question for all of you. What kind of rituals do you do daily if you don't mind sharing in the, in the comments. And is anybody lacking in feeling or does, what's the word I wanna say or the, how I wanna say it. Does anyone feel overwhelmed or anxious about fulfilling a new year's resolution? So let us know. Lydia's gonna be looking at the comments if anybody feels that way. So when we talk about meditation and I was talking about that earlier, for me, holding or creating the space for meditation can happen anytime in anywhere.

Caroline Beste (41m 52s):
And it can be brief, it can, it can last longer depending on the environment, the situation where I am. But it, it is also really important cuz there's, there's plenty of times like over the holidays, as stressful as they were where I just had to really make sure I stepped back and I took a deep breath or more many and just grounded myself and created that space of, of allowing myself to do some deep breathing, to start to replace the adrenaline with endorphin and which is obviously a natural relaxer chemical through our nervous system that relaxes us.

Caroline Beste (42m 35s):
So, and I can do that while I was driving. I could do that sitting in the hospital with my mom and holding her hand, you know, but you gotta do that body scan so when you get good news or bad news or let's say bad news and you feel like you're tightening, you've gotta be aware of the tension and then go, okay, I'm gonna breathe into it and release it. I don't, it's not gonna do you any good holding onto it, it'll do you harm, it'll raise your blood pressure. Oh my gosh, it'll, it'll create horrible tension perhaps, you know, TMJ headaches, all sorts of physical havoc on our bodies.

Caroline Beste (43m 18s):
Are we good? Yeah. Anything you wanna add, Lydia?

Lydia P. (43m 25s):
I wanna add that my own particular rituals bring about safety and so ritual has a tendency to make one feel safe. It's like the one yeah thing that you might be able to count on is your own rituals.

Caroline Beste (43m 42s):
That's a good, good

Lydia P. (43m 43s):
Prayer. And meditation is a ritual that nobody can usually interrupt. And if they do, I might get kind of snarky if they do like this is my moment, don't mess it up, right? Because I'm, this is what I'm praying and I'm praying about god's will be done because I really don't know what's good or bad for anybody.

Caroline Beste (44m 5s):
Yeah, beautiful.

Lydia P. (44m 6s):
So that's my intention for the day and that makes me feel safe and protected I guess too. And I think ritual makes the horse feel safe.

Caroline Beste (44m 16s):
Yes. Like a lot of people argue about routine with horses and I don't, I find routine in ritual very similar. My horses have routine, they get fed a certain time every day, but they're also okay, you know, with their routine changing. And that's really important too because being with me during that change should be more important than them worrying about are they gonna get fed? And, and I do understand completely doing all the rehab work I've done with, with all the horses that, you know, in the beginning they're all about the food and there's gonna be high anxiety until they can trust you and feel safe with you and realize that it, you know, that ritualistic connection, the way that you go about creating that consistent way of being together all the time is gonna be much more the somatic experience through their body and the natural nervous system.

Caroline Beste (45m 20s):
The release of endorphin is gonna override all of those, you know, the adrenaline and the, the anxiety that's created through food anxiety so to speak. So yeah, I've dealt with a lot of food and anxiety with horses and, and it can get really dangerous. It, especially if you're working with them and all of a sudden, you know, someone starts to feed and you're either riding or working and this horse is like all about the food. It can get really dangerous but yeah, safety, it's, and it's all, why does it create that? Because it releases naturally. It, you know, meditation is feeling the zone of meditation is the fact and the reality, the evidence is that it, it it's caused you get into that meditative state and that zone because you're releasing endorphin through the nervous system versus adrenaline.

Caroline Beste (46m 16s):
I mean that's the science behind it. So anything we do that is rhythmic releases endorphin and creates a meditative state, remember that anything we do that's rhythmic, anything we listen to, we watch, we feel somatically through our body in breath work is right there. We can obviously control the way we breathe in and out and that will naturally produce endorphin throughout the nervous system. Same for the horses. So, so if you have 15 minutes or less, you know, a lot of people don't have a lot of time when they board their horses and traveling to go see their horses and weather conditions.

Caroline Beste (47m 3s):
So what do, what do I do if I can't actually work with my horse and my New Year's resolution is to have a better deeper connected relationship this year yet, you know, I can't spend five hours a week with my horse maybe in one day, but that's not necessarily gonna create that ritual or that routine or that habit, that new way of being for any of us, including our horses. So if you, you know, for those of you that, that have less time but more frequent visits with your horse, there's so much you can do in that less time if it's just 15 minutes visiting your horse, you know, three to five times a week.

Caroline Beste (47m 46s):
And, and I've talked about this before too, you know, I've like three secrets to success and it's consistency, repetition and reward. Positive reward, which is you, you're the sweet spot, not the treat. So it's consist consistently being, showing up a way of being consistently doing something with your horse the same way and that's your repetition and offering tons of positive experiences during that time. So it's not like, oh let's go, go, go, go, go. And then here's your reward because it is that go, go, go, go, go. That creates a negative experience and then you're rewarding the negative experience.

Caroline Beste (48m 29s):
I'm talking about the experience being the reward you and the experience being the reward. And so often we think that we, we have to do, do, do to make something happen or to feel accomplished or successful when actually it's all about how you spend the time in how you show up, how you show up in that connection. So it's a lot to think about. Two examples for not if you don't have a lot of time to spend with your horse, especially with bad weather.

Caroline Beste (49m 12s):
And I know Lydia, you've got the horrific weather right now with the freezing temperatures, you know, and you've gotta feed your horses so you see your, your horses multiple times throughout the day but you can't spend a lot of time with them cuz it's so damn cold and the ground's frozen. So it's not like you can do a lot, you know, with that hard ground and it's all misshapen and it hurts their, the souls of their feet. So, and Lydia already knows this cuz she's a, a committed and active student of mine. But I have two great examples that I teach in my spirituality course and in my mastery membership program, which includes a spirituality course and those are the three principles of joining and connecting with your horse.

Caroline Beste (49m 53s):
And I have three very amazing ways to connect with your horse every day, every time you see them and feel that you are, that you, the both of you are, are engaged in, connected and joined. And that's the mind, the body and the heart. So the heart connection, the body connection and the mind connection. And Lydia, you love this. What explain to everyone how join up with horses in my work, the work that you're doing with your horses shows up in the mind, body and heart.

Caroline Beste (50m 34s):
And even if you only have so much time to go feed, but you wanna connect with your horse and you wanna keep that consistency or you need that ritual cuz it feels so good for both of you. And you wanna, and you also, this is the other trick or secret to training is it's not about doing as much as it is about being. So share with everybody what it's like to connect and join in mind, body and heart.

Lydia P. (51m 4s):
That's a that's a big look, that's a big question. It's it's a big one but, but, but what it's like is, especially if you have multiple horses, it's, it's, I heard something said this morning that I can say it maybe very short and it's not the actual music that makes the music, it's the dead space between the notes that makes the music and that is what it's like, it's intimately magical and not necessarily visual.

Lydia P. (51m 44s):
It's like God, it's unseen, it's felt,

Caroline Beste (51m 48s):
It's felt.

Lydia P. (51m 49s):
Yeah. And it's

Caroline Beste (51m 53s):
So joining of the mind. That was beautifully put. But to be tangible, joining of the mind means your horse connects with you visually, they look at you, right? They're thinking about you. It's that easy. You guys when the, when they look at you, they're thinking about you, the heart connection shows up. Yeah when the horse comes in and leans into you with their heart chakra and, and the more you develop your relationship, the horse will hug you, lean in and either hug you here or they'll wrap themselves around and pull you in. Cuz this is n this is instinctual and natural for horses to do when they feel close to another, they do this in close relationships with one another all the time and it becomes grooming.

Caroline Beste (52m 33s):
They hug and they groom and then the body that's pretty much the same thing. The body comes in and wants to be close to you, lean into you share that space with you, connect in that, that energetic feeling that just you feel in your heart. You did as usual the most beautiful way of explaining it poetically. I brought a little more the tangible part to it.

Lydia P. (52m 60s):
Yes, yes. Thank you. Because I'm, it makes me almost speechless sometimes to experience it on a daily basis all day long. Yes. I feel very, I feel very privileged to be taught by them and to be a part of their world. Like I don't think I am, they're a part of my world. I'm a part of their world. If that makes,

Caroline Beste (53m 22s):
Yeah.

Lydia P. (53m 23s):
So it's just that, it's

Caroline Beste (53m 25s):
Just, and when you get to that place, that level where, where you are a part of their world, then they're always looking for you. That's why it's so easy for me to walk down the barn during am feeding and my guys leave their food and come over with hay, you know, or or wet green soaked pellet mouths for a kiss or a blow in the nose. It's beautiful. It's cuz you're part of the world. Yep. Yeah. So thank you. So I already mentioned my three secrets to creating meaning, purpose, feeling fulfilled, accomplished, or content in feeling successful with your horse is making sure that you're consistent, you are repetitious and that the experience itself that you share is rewarding the experience that way of being that space, that felt space is really important.

Caroline Beste (54m 32s):
So I'm gonna wrap this up. Lydia has a beautiful gratitude prayer she's gonna share at the very end I'm gonna wrap up with six intentions to help you focus, manifest and fulfill in the new year. And before I give you those intentions, I'm just gonna talk a little bit about what this year looks like for the Dow horsemanship last year, this time last year, I mentioned that I was gonna be pulling back and reflecting last year and getting quiet because I had spent three years like becoming burnt out with creating so much content online. And, and, and last year that's exactly what I did.

Caroline Beste (55m 17s):
And this year I am gearing back up as we speak to travel again and get more engaged on a one-on-one and host clinics. So I am opening my doors, it's been three or four years and I'm opening my doors back up to being accessible to all of you, traveling to you for private work or clinics. And so I'm gonna be, for those of you that have subscribed to my email list, you'll get a notification hopefully sooner than later this time, some sometime this month in January of all the new clinics that I'm gonna be offering here or at your place.

Caroline Beste (55m 59s):
And so I'm really excited about, about feeling ready to do that again. I burnt out from that and then threw myself into creating all this content, got burnt out, I'm in a good place, gave myself a break last year and a much needed break to be with my, my husband and my mom. And, and so now I'm gearing back up and that's what this year's gonna look like is getting out there and in the trenches and hopefully getting back to some YouTube videos and some fun stuff around here. But not until I can get caught up with my promotions. And so let me go ahead and share these six intentions to help you focus, manifest and fulfill in the new year.

Caroline Beste (56m 39s):
Number one. And they're in this order. Visualize, think about what you want to have or accomplish this year. Visualize, visualize what's it gonna look like, what's it gonna feel like? Sit and create the space in your mind and in your heart and feel the energy of those intentions. The power of feeling is amazing. Don't just think about it, how do you feel about it? That's that vibration we wanna put out there. Number two, create daily rituals that focus on prayers, mantras, or meditation.

Caroline Beste (57m 23s):
So make a list. Your list could be one, it's on a list. Maybe three things that you wanna focus on or more to start habitualizing, make a daily practice a daily habit. Sometimes it takes a while and before they become second nature obviously and they can be accessible anytime. You know, I wanna be able to turn them on and off anytime, you know, I wanna use them as like recharging. You know my, my meditation, all meditation should be to recharge too. So what can you do when you're feeling depleted? But you gotta be able to recognize that. Number three, allow your rituals to include connecting with your senses daily, whether it be nature, get outta your mind, whether it be nature, being outdoors or with your animals listening to sounds that make you feel good, compassionate touch, engage your senses and feel a lot of this is getting out of our head.

Caroline Beste (58m 23s):
Number four, honor yourself and your loved ones two and four legged. Honor yourself and your loved ones with positivity, thankfulness, and grace, which is goodwill. Grace, create the space for grace. That's gonna be my word this year. Grace. I like that. Number five, find quiet time without any stimulation. This is a hard one for a lot of people. And learn how to be comfortable with the quiet. And I don't mean reading, I mean quiet.

Caroline Beste (59m 3s):
Either you sit with your eyes wide open with nothing else going on or you close your eyes. How many of us can be quiet? So this is calming the mind. I'll, I'll be right there. Calming the mind is the first step to developing leadership and clarity in your life. You being the leader for your life. Yes, Lydia,

Lydia P. (59m 28s):
Nothing.

Caroline Beste (59m 29s):
Oh okay. I thought, thought you

Lydia P. (59m 31s):
Said I can be quiet. I can go outside and be quiet and just stare off at nothing easy.

Caroline Beste (59m 36s):
Me too. Gosh, can I do that? And number six, stay in your heart and not in your head. Lead with your gut and your intuition. And again, if anybody needs help with this, this is what I do. You can come and learn with me in the horses, I can come to you or we can do a long distance zoom coaching session. I have students all over the world. Zoom is amazing and it's free for you guys. All you have to do is download it. Alright, excellent. Ms. Lydia, please grace us with this beautiful gratitude. Blessing.

Lydia P. (1h 0m 16s):
Yes. This was given to me and it was

Caroline Beste (1h 0m 20s):
Real quick. Hold on, just lean into yeah so we get your voice. Thank you dear.

Lydia P. (1h 0m 26s):
Okay. This was hand scribe given to me for having a gathering in September at the harvest and I I wanted to share it with you because it is the indigenous version of the allegiance to gratitude for the year and allegiance to gratitude. And I'm saying it's scribed because I might have to focus on a word because it's hand scribed, right? Like it's not typed. Okay, here we go. Today we have gathered and when we look upon the faces around us, we see that cycles of life continue. We have been given the duty to live in harmony and balance with each other and all living things. So now let us bring our minds together as one.

Lydia P. (1h 1m 7s):
We give greetings and thanks to each other as people. Now our minds are one. We are thankful to our mother the earth for she gives us everything that we need for life. She supports our feet as we walk about upon her, she gives us great joy that she still continues to care for us just as she has from the beginning of time to her mother. We send Thanksgiving love and respect. Now our minds are one. We give thanks to all the waters of the world for quenching our thirsts, providing strength and nurturing life for all beings. We know it's power in many forms, waterfalls and rain, mists and streams, rivers and oceans, snow and ice.

Lydia P. (1h 1m 52s):
We are grateful that the waters are still here and meeting their responsibilities to the rest of creation. Can we agree that water is important to our lives and bring our minds together as one sin. Greetings and thanks to the water. Now our minds are one. We turn our thoughts to all fish life in the water they were instructed to cleanse and purify the water. They also give themselves to us as food. We are are grateful that they continue to do their duties and we sinn to the fish our greetings and our thanks. Now our minds are one. Now we turn toward the vast fields of plant life. As far as the eye can see, the plants grow working many wonders, they sustain many life forms.

Lydia P. (1h 2m 36s):
With our minds gathered together, we give thanks and look forward to seeing plant life for many generations to come. Now our minds are one. When we both, when we look about us, we see that our, that the berries are still here providing us with delicious foods. The leader of the berries. Is the strawberry the first to ripen in the spring? Can we agree that we are grateful that the berries are with us in the world and send our thanksgiving love and respect to the berries? Now our minds are one with one mind. We honor and thank all food plants we harvest from the garden, especially the three sisters who feed the people with such abundance.

Lydia P. (1h 3m 16s):
Since the beginning of time, the greens, vegetables, and beans and fruits have helped the people survive. Many other living themes drawn straw strength from them as well. We gather together in our minds all the plant foods and send them a greeting and thanks. Now our minds are one. Now we turn to the medicine herbs of the world. From the beginning they were instructed to take away sickness. They were always waiting and ready to heal us. We are so happy that they are still among us, those special few who remember how to use the plants for healing with one mind. We send Thanksgiving love and respect to the medicines and the keepers of the medicines.

Lydia P. (1h 3m 57s):
Now our minds are one stare standing around us, we seal all the trees. The earth has many families of trees who each have their own instructions and uses. Some provide shelter and shade, others fruit and beauty and many useful gifts. The maple and its leader of the trees to recognize its gifts as sugar when the people need it. Most many peoples of the world recognize a tree as a symbol of peace and strength. With one mind. We greet and thank the tree life. Now our minds are one. We gather our minds together to send our greetings. And thanks to all the beautiful animal life of the world who walk about with us, they have many things to teach us as people.

Lydia P. (1h 4m 43s):
We are grateful that they continue to share their lives with us and hope that it will always be so. Let us put our minds together as one and send our thanks to all the animals. Now our minds are one. We put our minds together as one and thank all the birds who move and fly about over our heads. The creator gave them strength or gave them the gift of beautiful songs. Each morning they greet the day and with their songs, remind us to enjoy and appreciate life. The eagle was chosen to be their leader and to watch over the world to all the birds from the smallest to the largest. We send our joyful greetings and thanks. Now our minds are one. We are all thankful for the powers we know.

Lydia P. (1h 5m 23s):
As the four wins, we hear their voices in the moving air. As they refresh us and purify air, we breathe. They help to bring the change of seasons from the four directions. They come bringing us messages and giving us strength with one mind. We send our greetings and thanks to the four wins, now our minds are one. Now we turn the west where our grandfather, the thunder beans, live with lightning and thundering voices. They bring with them the water that renews life. We bring our minds together as one to send greetings and thanks, excuse me, grandfathers the thunders.

Lydia P. (1h 6m 4s):
We, we now send greetings and thanks to our eldest brother, the son. Each day without fail, he travels the sky from east to west, bringing the light of the new day. He is the source of all fire of life. With one mind we send greets and thanks to our brother, the son, now our minds are one. We put our minds together and give thanks to our oldest grandmother, the moon who lights the night sky, nighttime sky. She's the leader of women all over the world and she governs the movement of the ocean tides by her changing face. We measure time and it is the moon who watches over the arrival of children here on earth. Let us gather our thanks to grand for grandmother Moon together in a pile layer upon layer of gratitude, then joyfully fling that pile of thanks into the night sky that she will know with one mind.

Lydia P. (1h 6m 55s):
We send greetings and thanks to our grandmother, the moon, while we give thanks to the stars who are spread across the sky like jewelry, we see them at night helping the moon to light the darkness and bringing due to the gardens and growing things. When we travel at night, they guide us home with our minds gathered as one, we sing greetings and thanks to the stars. Now our mind is one. We're almost done. I've been the pages stuck together, we gather our minds to great and thank the enlightened teachers who come to help throughout the agents.

Lydia P. (1h 7m 35s):
When we forget how to live in harmony, they remind us of the way we were instructed to live. As people with one mind, we send greetings. And thanks to the caring teachers, now our minds are one. Thank you, Caroline. We now turn our thoughts to the creator or great spirit and send greetings and Thanks for all the gifts of creation. Everything we need to live a good life is here on Mother Earth for all the love that is still around us. We gather our minds together as one and send our joyous, our choices, words of greetings, and thanks to the Creator. Now our minds are one. We have now arrived at the place where we end our words.

Lydia P. (1h 8m 16s):
Of all the things we have named. It is not our intention to leave anything out if something was forgotten. We leave it to each individual to sin such greetings and thanks in their own way. And now our minds are one note, there are some who would say, this is too long a proper response. Poor you. What a pity. We have so much to be grateful for.

Caroline Beste (1h 8m 38s):
I'm crying. That is absolutely beautiful. Thank you.

Lydia P. (1h 8m 42s):
This is so perfect.

Caroline Beste (1h 8m 44s):
It's so perfect to welcome the new year with such level of gratitude. Thank you, Lydia.

Lydia P. (1h 8m 53s):
Yes. Now I have a question. So now I'm gonna have to put in, I'll put in where this came from.

Caroline Beste (1h 9m 1s):
Ok

Lydia P. (1h 9m 2s):
Honor you. Thank you. And I think, are you gonna, are you gonna be posting this to the Facebook private community page too?

Caroline Beste (1h 9m 11s):
Yes, yes, yes. So send me where did, yeah, just send me where people can, can get that. Yeah. Can they get that or is it private?

Lydia P. (1h 9m 22s):
It came out of a book. No, it, it's, it came out of a book.

Caroline Beste (1h 9m 26s):
Oh, good. Okay. Yes. Share that and I'll include all of that. Oh my gosh, that was beautiful. Thank you. All right. Well, happy New Year everyone. And you can use this podcast as part of your ritual, so don't forget. And books are great rituals and reading and anything that gives back that allows you to give. So thank you, Lydia. That was absolutely beautiful. And thank you everyone. And next week, next Wednesday, we have a podcast with welcome back, Rahan Zia. And we're gonna be talking, I can't remember the title right now, sorry.

Caroline Beste (1h 10m 10s):
But it's gonna be pretty deep again, definitely a more spiritually inclined podcast with Rahansia next Wednesday. So I hope you all join us. Everything that we talk about in these podcasts is absolutely applicable to our horsemanship. Absolutely. And, and that's the way I teach. So if you, if any of you are wondering, wow, you know, on my YouTube channel, you know how, why is this on here? Believe me, this is the essence of who I am and the essence of how I be with my horses and what I teach. It's, it's real. Absolutely.

Caroline Beste (1h 10m 50s):
All right. God bless everyone. May you all be one with your horse. Thank you. Happy New Year. Love to all and we'll see you next week. Thank you. Stay warm, love. Yay. And I'll catch up with you later. Okay. Bye everybody.