You don't have to worry about diastasis recti....honest

On this week's episode I talk about what I believe is one of the biggest problems in women's post-natal recovery; Fear. And especially "The fear of making things worse".

By far most of the emails I get refer to this in one way or another.

"What if I make my diastasis worse?"
"I am told I can't do X exercise because my stomach will rip open"
"The physio told me not to lift anything, including my toddler"

The fitness industry, especially the post-partum fitness industry, is selling you this idea that you have to be scared or disgusted all the time.

"BE CAREFUL OR YOU'LL NEVER RECOVER!"
"DON'T CARRY YOUR BABY ON YOUR HIPS OR YOU'LL MAKE YOUR DIASTASIS WORSE!"
"DIASTASIS IS A LIFELONG CONDITION.....so keep giving me your money".

"I know you don't like your post-partum belly but you gave birth and that's a beautiful thing" is a wonderful "negging" thing to do that makes you think you should feel unhappy with the way you look and it's something a lot of post-partum exercise providers like to use.

Though there are of course certain things you have to be aware of when trying to heal your diastasis/pelvic floor or any other post-partum issues that is not the same as being scared or digusted.

As always; HPNB still only has 5 billing cycles.

So this means that you not only get 3 months FREE access, no obligation!

BUT, if you decide you want to do the rest of the program, after only 5 months of paying $10/£8 a month you now get FREE LIFE TIME ACCESS! That's $50 max spend, in case you were wondering.

Though I'm not terribly active on  Instagram and Facebook you can follow us there. I am however active on Threads so find me there!

And, of course, you can always find us on our YouTube channel if you like your podcast in video form :)

Visit healthypostnatalbody.com and get 3 months completely FREE access. No sales, no commitment, no BS.

Email peter@healthypostnatalbody.com if you have any questions, comments or want to suggest a guest/topic  

Transcript

Peter Lap: 0:00

Hey, welcome to the Healthy Postnatal Body Podcast. I your postnatal, expert . That, as always, would be me. Today I am talking fear. Stop overthinking your diastasis right. now. Just stop being scared. You know by far most of the emails, as it says in the podcast description. By far most of the emails I get basically go "what if I make my diastasis worse? I'm told I can't do exercise anymore. Physio told me not to lift anything heavy. The midwife told me my diastasis was the worst she's ever seen. All I literally heard that from someone this week. Uh, and it's not even the worst I've ever seen. So you know that's what I'm talking about today.

Peter Lap: 0:40

The fitness industry, a lot of the health industry, it seems determined to scare you and I'm here to tell you that there's not that much to worry He a. Podcast with little old me. This is a podcast for the 19th of May 2024. And you know I've got seven dogs here. So if you hear a tremendous amount of noise, including puppies, no-transcript. I'm afraid that that's what this is. What am I talking about today? Fear, fear, the fear. You know by far, like I said in the intro, most of the emails I get refer to this in one way or another. I had an email from someone this week as well, or last week, said what if I perform a sit-up incorrectly, something along those lines. So yeah, there's a lot. This happens an awful lot in the postpartum industry. So this idea that doing one little thing will make your postpartum issues significantly worse and I hope I'm not guilty of that I know certain things, obviously.

Peter Lap: 2:13

I do point out that if you do the wrong thing consistently with regards to exercise, then you could make your diastasis re ecta worse. For instance, your diastasis re ecta worse with regards to your muscle activation and all that sort of stuff. You know you teach your body to cheat, but that is not a I did a squat and my diastasis recti got worse sort of situation. You know, be careful or you'll never recover. It's one of the things that I hear really, really regularly. Don't do XYZ exercise because your diastasis recti will get worse. Don't do crunches Crunches is like the go-to example, right Crunches and planks. Don't do crunches and planks because your diastasis recti will get worse, and that is simply just not true.

Peter Lap: 3:14

Do a lot of exercise incorrectly and increase, keep increasing the internal pressure on the core and all that. Then your diastasis recti could get worse. Yeah, in the same way that you know, if you have one pregnancy you have diastasis recti, you don't heal it, and then you have a second one and the second one is bigger. Or you have twins, then, yeah, your diastasis recti will likely get worse. But that is prolonged pressure, right.

Peter Lap: 3:45

That is not the same as doing something temporarily, like one of the things that I know a lot of moms do and a lot of moms come to me because they're concerned about it is, for instance, you carry your kid around with you all day. By that I mean, pick me up mommy, pick me up mommy. So you know you pick your kid up off the ground. That's a lift, right. And the physio just told you not to lift anything, including a toddler. I hear that an awful lot from physios. I tell my clients not to lift anything. I'm like you're out of your mind, right? If you're listening to this I know some some physios are listening to this stop telling people not to pick up their kids. First of all, they have no choice. They have to lift their kids. And secondly, you can tell them how to lift properly, and I don't mean lifting with your legs and all that sort of stuff. I'm talking about exhaling on the effort, try to engage your core as you lift. That's all you need to say Right, mommy, pick me up. Mom, mommy, pick me up. Okay, inhale, right, small inhale, and then, as you're lifting, exhale and engage your core and then you can carry your toddler around happy as Larry.

Peter Lap: 5:06

If a lot of moms, a lot of women, put their kids on their hips, it's something. It's fascinating. I've never quite figured out how to do it, but you know, you put your kid on the hips as you're doing stuff around the house, around the kitchen or whatever. Usually, when I see it, it's usually in a food preparation sort of situation, so kid goes on the hip for a while. Now, is that great for your posture? No, of course it isn't. It's not ideal posture and therefore, by definition, it's not great. Is it going to make things worse? No, because you can easily compensate for this. You can easily do exercises that help and you should do exercises. You can easily do exercises to offset all that.

Peter Lap: 6:00

That is the role, as far as I'm concerned, of any sort of postpartum fitness professional, health professional whatever you want to call that a physio or women's health physio. Their clients can recover whilst still living a normal life. Telling people they can't do X, y, z. First of all, that means that people will give up on themselves, but also it's just not unrealistic on themselves. But also it's just not unrealistic I know that physio said this because you're scaring people into inaction. That's sooner or later. That is what's going to happen. If you're constantly telling people or you're constantly being told, don't do this, this will make it worse and your clients, the people, keep doing that particular action. Sooner or later they're going to stop doing the exercises. That will make it better, because they will stop believing there's a point into doing the exercises, there's any point left into doing the exercises, because they'll be scared into inaction.

Peter Lap: 7:24

Or and I've seen examples of this and this is really horrific women get too scared to pick their kids up, right, because the diastasis recti is. I saw this. Someone sent me this in an email I can't pick my children up because my diastasis recti is too bad. And I just asked the question can you physically lift your kids, or is your back completely buggered or something along those lines? No, I'm physically strong enough to do it, but my diastasis recti is so horrific that I don't pick my kids up anymore. And then you look at the diastasis recti and it's not great, but it's not insurmountable. It's not a real problem. The problem is that people aren't doing exercises anymore because they believe there's no point to it, but they also stopped picking their kids up.

Peter Lap: 8:17

You can make I use in the healthy postnatal body program, not so much towards the latter stages, because I wanted that to be as straightforward and as low entry level as possible with regards to equipment required, but when I do PT with people postpartum people I use kettlebells and dumbbells and all that sort of stuff, and my dumbbells start at 6kg each and my my dumbbells start at six kilograms each and my kettlebell starts at 12. Right, if you can lift a 12 kilogram kettlebell, you can probably pick up an eight or 10 kilogram kid for a while. Right? It's about doing these things safely. It's about if you can. Right, if you can carry your shopping and you can then you can carry your child. Telling people not to pick anything up is ridiculous. What we have to do is show people how to pick these things up.

Peter Lap: 9:27

Like I said, exhale on the effort. That's usually all you need to do. That's all you need to remember. That is lesson one, which is why in the HPMB program, the longest video is the core breath video. Exhale on the effort, learn how to exhale properly and engage your core whilst you're exhaling. And you're halfway there. I promise you, I swear to god, if you, if you, if you exhale properly and achieve decent muscle activation whilst you're exhaling, decent core activation, decent tva activation, um, whilst you're exhaling, so you're doing the core breath properly. That that's all I'm saying. Right, that's half the battle. It really is. I mean, if there's one thing you take from any sort of postpartum program, it's X-heading properly. Now, like I said, I'm not a big fan of diaphragmatic breathing and all that sort of stuff, but even that is better than not exhaling at all.

Peter Lap: 10:32

The habit most people have to get out of when they're picking stuff up especially women with diastasis recti is holding their breath as they're lifting something heavy, or even when it's not that heavy. So picking up the shopping, the shopping bags, lifting the shopping bags out of the trolley, picking the kids up and putting them in the car you know all the travel systems and all the buggies and all that sort of stuff If you exhale properly on the effort. So it's not even extra breathing that you need to do because you know, in an ideal world, you breathe regularly, right? Otherwise you're going to have a completely different problem. You always exhale as you're doing these. You always breathe as you're doing these. You always breathe as you're doing these exercises. Anyways, what just tends to happen with people who are picking up something that they feel is heavy so not even necessarily heavy, but they feel is going to be heavy is they hold their breath, and it's only adults that do this. Kids tend not to do this that much, unless they're setting a personal best. Adults tend to be really, really bad for this. They hold their breath when they're picking up a weight and then they exhale when they're holding the weight.

Peter Lap: 11:53

When you look at some of the kettlebell squat videos, kettlebell sumo squats on our YouTube channel and all that sort of stuff which, again, is just healthy postnatal body, so it's easy to find and I think I'll link to it in the podcast description as well Go to the YouTube channel and have a look at the exercises that we're doing. So kettlebell swings, kettlebell sumo squats, kettlebell bent over rows, all that sort of stuff. It is all completely and utterly safe to do and as long as you're exhaling where I tell you to exhale, right. So when you do that, most people, when you look at a lot of other kettlebell videos and you see this when people because I had an email from somebody who was an instructor, fitness instructor, and asked very insightful questions right, and so absolutely love the email, but as they were saying in in in their email that most instructors that are teaching a class or doing a diet, do doing an exercise video or anything like that and you see this a lot on YouTube they are not breathing properly because they're explaining, they're talking at the same time and as soon as you're talking at the same time, that gets a little bit more difficult. So copying that is a fairly bad habit, right, you have to separate yourself a little bit from those instructors and their job is not to show you everything with perfect form and all that sort of stuff and with perfect breathing. Their job is to explain to you how that works, which is why we took a slightly different approach with the HPMB program over some of the other programs out there in or at least some of the programs are out there at the time.

Peter Lap: 13:50

I haven't checked up on new videos for quite a while from other people. But basically, what? What? What I decided to do was use ask four women who happened to have given birth as well at some stage of various stages of their postpartum journey to come in and they did the exercises and I then narrated on top of that. They did the exercises and I then narrated on top of that, because that is the way that for me, that is the way that you can then still see what the point is.

Peter Lap: 14:35

They're exhaling on the effort rather than talking you through, when you should be exhaling on the effort, because as soon as you start talking and you're squeezing your core, you're likely to hold your breath a little bit. Most people don't exhale at the same time as they are talking. Singers still right, just as the words are flowing from their mouth, so is the air, and therefore they can just breathe in again as they are talking. But a lot of people who are exercising and talking start to hold their breath and therefore the problem with holding your breath, as I always say with regards to diastasis recti, is you increase the internal pressure on your core, you're bracing your core or you're bracing your spine, which is exactly the opposite of what we're looking to know, right?

Peter Lap: 15:28

So yeah, that's a bit of a side, bit of a segue there, but basically the idea that you will make diastasis recta or your pelvic floor significantly worse, as in cause an injury because that's what it then is right, it's an escalation of the injury you already have Just by doing something fairly straightforward, is incorrect. Now, of course, if you have pelvic floor problems and say you're a 60-kilogram woman, you have pelvic floor problems, weakness or prolapse or something, and you pick up a 120-kilogram barbell and you're going to do a deadlift or two, yeah, that's going to cause you issues, right? Because then you are doing something well outside the realms of normal daily physical exercise, do you do something very special and for that that sort of stuff can easily lead to an injury, because you know, then you have you compensate for that, in the same way that people who do strongman competitions, strongwoman competitions and all that sort of stuff, you know they hold their breath, they start bleeding from their nose and all that sort of stuff, because internal pressure is just that much, but they're trying to achieve something extraordinary and you can get injured doing something like that. There's no doubt at all. You can always get injured though something like that. Your chances of getting injured. Um, you can always get injured though something like that. Your chances of getting injured when you have any sort of issues are just significantly higher. But carrying the shopping or picking up a child or something like that, you have to be really unlucky to do your back in picking up your kid. Unless, of course, you already have a really bad back injury and an iffy back because you have ridiculous levels of muscle dysfunction or muscle weakness or your core isn't functioning properly. Then that can happen, but that is then that's fixable Right. Just by doing exercises, 10 minutes a day every day, twice a week, 20 to 40 minutes depending on how much your fitness levels are session strength session, as I call them you can heal that stuff. You can make progress towards healing that stuff and prevent any sort of weird injuries happening. So and that is why I think people need to do postpartum exercise Anything else, you don't have to be scared of the stuff.

Peter Lap: 18:15

It's just you know that constant being in this state of fear and therefore not doing stuff. I had emails from someone saying I can't go on a bicycle because my PT I'm working with can't go, tells me I can't cycle because that will make my diastasis rectal worse. Like I said, I've had physios telling people not to lift anything and it doesn't make sense. That is just not how the human body works. It is how sales programs work. It really is. It's a very successful sales tactic but is not actually correct and it's not in the long run. It is definitely not helping you get closer to any sort of health, any sort of recovery, so to speak.

Peter Lap: 19:10

Speaking of which, I saw something beautiful this week. I mean it was really, you know, nagging. It's something the cool kids know about. So I'm too old, right, nagging because it's something I cool kids know about. So I'm too old, right, negging, because it's something I know from television. I don't even tend, I think. What was it? One of those spy movies? I think it was Kingsman, secret Service, kingsman. That's the first time I heard about Negging the movie wonderful movie, by the way. I heard about Negging. What Negging movie? By the way, uh heard about negging. What negging was? Playing someone, a negative compliment, um, so to speak. I heard about that, uh, through the film and, like I said, I'm not cool enough to to know about, but I came across a beautiful example and it really hit me uh, this week because a lot of postpartum exercise providers tend to do this. Right, tell me if you have ever heard this before. I know you don't.

Peter Lap: 20:06

Or a variation of this I know you don't like your postpartum belly, but you gave birth and that's a beautiful thing. You are amazing, mama, something along those lines. Think about that for a little while and then think about what we're actually saying. I know you don't like your postpartum belly, but you gave birth and that's a beautiful thing. You should be proud of yourself, right, or you are amazing, or something like that. It always ends with you should be proud of yourself, or you are amazing. And then it says mama and right, and that sort of pedantic, patronizing sort of tongue, this fake, the fake compliment. There is, of course, that you're going to be a beautiful thing.

Peter Lap: 20:58

No-transcript, because they know you don't like your postpartum belly. It doesn't say you might not like your postpartum belly. Even that would be iffy. But I know you don't, I understand. I understand you don't like the way you look Implies. I also would not like the way I looked if I looked like you. But you gave birth and that's a beautiful thing. You should be really happy with yourself.

Peter Lap: 21:26

Now just buy my little program. Apologies, as I'm banging into something. Just buy my little program and we'll fix your postpartum build a bit about you that you don't like, but you're still amazing. And then you go yeah, let me buy your stuff. This person understands me. Yeah, let me buy your stuff. This person understands me and I see this sort of thing an awful lot and I get that. It works, because the health and fitness industry is really really good at this sort of stuff. But this fake, this idea that they implant in your head listen for me it's very simple. It's the same as I tell obese people this all the time when they come to me your obesity or your postpartum belly or whatever you have, doesn't offend me. It really doesn't. It doesn't offend me at all.

Peter Lap: 22:26

I don't know that you don't like yourself as in.

Peter Lap: 22:31

I don't have that knowledge. I don't have that. Yeah, I know, if I looked like you, I'd think to myself Jesus, this isn't right. Right, that's what they're saying. That's what they're selling you. Right, that's what they're saying. That's what they're selling you. Right, it's if you are happy with the way you look, you're happy with the way you look. If you don't care how you look, you don't care how you look, that's also okay. If you don't like the way you look, then you don't like the way you look. Okay, so you change that.

Peter Lap: 23:01

But using that as a sales tactic the idea that you should not like the way you look but be grateful because you just gave birth is just such a sneaky and crappy way to do it. And, like I said and I know there will be people listening to this end, but that's not what they mean this is a proven sales tactic. Right, I can get a marketing guy that will tell you that, yeah, this stuff really, really works. This is the health and fitness industry has done this for for a while. Right, let's get rid of the bits you don't like about yourself.

Peter Lap: 23:47

Um, you know those, those ugly, uh, backflip and these are just examples right, those ugly back fat bits? Oh, yeah, well, we can, you know, look on youtube, go onto youtube and say and look up things like target that, that ugly back fat sort of thing, how to get rid of your ugly back fatty bits and then in the video there will no doubt be someone saying you know those bits that none of us like something, something along those lines that is designed to be. Um, cause, those bits are much more scripted than my dinky little podcast is. Those bits are designed to have you go. Yeah, you're right, I don't like this about myself. Let me buy whatever you're selling, and that is the thing that you. Just you know. Be aware of it. I'll call it my behind the label this week. Just be aware of it that that is what's happening. You don't have to be scared of making your postpartum issues worse, and you don't have to be disgusted with yourself for looking like you just gave birth, when you, you know, just gave birth, or even if it's been a while since you gave birth. There's no reason.

Peter Lap: 25:09

I addressed this thing that Shappi Korshandi, the British comedian, wrote in the Guardian a while ago. She said my mom told me it's the price I have to pay for having a baby. My round belly is the price I have to pay. And I said something along the lines of that is simply not true. Now, I didn't say that because I'm like, no, you shouldn't like the way you look. I said it because it is factually incorrect that you still need to have a round belly because that is the price you pay. Now, that is just not true. That bit is factually incorrect.

Peter Lap: 25:48

I'm not saying it in the way that you shouldn't feel happy within yourself. If you want a round belly, or you're happy with a round belly, you don't want to do the exercise because, let's be honest, a lot of people don't like exercising. Yeah, sure, okay, that's fine. You don't have to be disgusted with yourself. You can be completely happy looking any way you want, right? Isn't that kind of the whole point of of of what we're doing now? And I'm like I said it before, I'm a middle-aged white guy, I'm as judgy as you can be and it is none of anybody else's concern. As a sales tactic, it's a really shitty tactic to use. You don't need to be disgusted with yourself to address your issues. You can say listen, I'm working on this for my health.

Peter Lap: 26:40

It doesn't even have to be an aesthetic thing, because I know, again, with regards to the diastasis recti, a lot of the times healthcare professionals and by that I mean GPs and physios and surgeons and all that see diastasis recti as an aesthetic issue, and it isn't. It's an injury that can be prevented and that can be healed. Sorry, not prevented in case of pregnancy, at least it can be prevented as an occurring injury for people doing extraordinary things. So as long as you exhale correctly, you're very unlikely to get diastasis recti. If you're lifting heavy to get diastasis recti if you're lifting heavy in the gym, for instance, or if you're in a wheelchair, right, I've spoke about that before. But for postpartum women it is an injury, it is not an aesthetic issue. And we have to, we have to move away from that chat because until we do, no one takes it seriously and you know, nothing will ever get done about this on the nhs, on private health care and all that through your private health care provider and all that sort of fun stuff.

Peter Lap: 28:02

Anyways, that's my little rant on for the week, because I know it's a little bit ranty this week. Apologies for that. I like to. I like to be happy and clappy, but sometimes I can't always manage it. Maybe if I scripted this thing better, I could. I could find a way to end on a happy note. But you know, what can I do? What can I do? That's my half hour up for the week, which is surprising because I didn't actually say that much. Thanks very much to everyone getting in touch. Right, I love all your emails. Like I said before, you know, peter at healthypostnatalbodycom if you have any questions about food, about postpartum issues, about anything else.

Peter Lap: 28:46

If I can get an expert on, I will, because it's not just me running the show. I've got some interviews coming up again. I'm still working on translation into Spanish and Hindi and now, of course, kazakh and Czech and all that sort of stuff for the HPMB program. But I need to test that and that is going to take a little while because I can't just throw a crappy translation out there and hope that it sticks. So that is still the plan. That is still being worked on.

Peter Lap: 29:26

If you have any, I would love to hear what the difference is from my Kazakh listeners and the ones in Chechnya. Is that? Are you then still Czech, or is it Chechen right? I don't know, because, like I'm from the days of Czechoslovakia and the Czech Republic, and now it's different again, I'm from the days of you know, czechoslovakia and the Czech Republic, and now it's different again. So have we changed the name of people who are, you know, czech? Are they now Czechian? I don't know. Czech is a different area altogether. I'm saying Czechian. Anyways, that's enough. Get in touch, share what your experience is like over there. I'm turning Chechian. Anyways, that's enough waffling. Get in touch, share what your experience is like over there.

Peter Lap: 30:09

I'm always fascinated here. It doesn't mean I'll use it on the podcast. It just means I'm fascinated here because it gives me more knowledge and maybe helps me target the program a little bit better. When I start translating it into other languages I can make it more area specific, because you might well get a different level of support, different level of support than you do over in the UK, which means higher, higher level of support than we do in the UK, and in that case you know I can make it more useful to you. Anyways, peter at HealthyPersonalBodycom, peter at healthyposthetalbodycom, thank you very much for listening. It's always appreciated. You take care of yourself and I'll be back next week.

Peter Lap: 30:52

Bye, now, I don't know what to do. Can't keep my eyes off of you. I'm impatient. Don't keep me waiting, cause you know how I get when you make me upset. Oh, I can't stand it. Oh, I demand it. I get so tongue-tied when you look in my eyes. It's tragic. I call it magic. Oh, I cannot hide, oh, I cannot lie. You make me crazy, Crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy baby, crazy, crazy baby, even when you're away. Think about you all day. I feel ready To make this steady Now I am sure I don't feel insecure. You could be my baby. Why can't I hide? Why can't I lie? You make me crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy. Crazy for your love. Crazy for your love. Crazy for your love, oh crazy baby. Crazy for your love. Crazy for your love. Crazy for your love. Crazy, oh crazy baby.