Time In Your Space - Stephen Ridley - Music Composer - Season 5 - #227

In this episode of the Us People Podcast, host Savia Rocks celebrates season five, focusing on empowering creativity through diversity. 

Musician and founder of Ridley Academy, Stephen Ridley, shares his journey from an investment banker to an acclaimed street performer and music teacher. He discusses the profound impact of discovering his true passion for music, the importance of self-belief, and his innovative method of teaching piano that helps people reconnect with their creativity. 

Stephen's inspiring stories highlight the significance of pursuing one's purpose and the power of music in transforming lives.

 0:00 - Savia Rocks introduces season five of the Us People Podcast, focusing on creativity and diversity.

 0:30 - Introduction of guest Stephen Ridley, a musician and founder of Ridley Academy.

 1:00 - Stephen shares his background: growing up in South Yorkshire, his father's death, and his early struggles.

 2:00 - Stephen discusses his transition from investment banking to pursuing music.

 4:00 - The turning point: performing impromptu on a street piano in London and realizing his impact on others.

 6:30 - Stephen's experiences traveling and performing globally, including for royalty and celebrities.

 8:00 - Stephen talks about creating his music academy and its mission to simplify learning piano.

 10:00 - Discussion on the flaws of traditional music education and the new method developed by Stephen.

 12:00 - Stephen speaks on overcoming invalidation and empowering students worldwide.

 Website: https://www.ridleyacademy.com/

"Time In Your Space is knowing that you can be free with who you are without the approval or option of someone else" - Savia Rocks

Transcript

Savia Rocks: 0:00

Hey guys, we made it to season five of the Us people podcast. I'm your host Savia rocks. And in this season, we aim to empower and embrace creativity through diversity as we dive into the fascinating stories and experiences of a diverse range of individuals. Highlighting their unique perspectives and creative endeavors from artists and entrepreneurs to innovators and activists, we celebrate the power of diversity in driving creativity and fostering positive change. Join us as we engage in thought provoking conversations like I made myself intentionally homeless in pursuit of my purpose.

Jay Harris: 0:41

We're aware that. A lot of people want to present and they, and they were in my position and what's worse, they weren't a white male, which is a joke. That's even still a thing. I

Mel: 0:49

think my family never, ever say you can't do something. So full of support, full of support for whatever dream. If I said tomorrow when I fly to the moon, they'll probably say, I wish you all the best Mel.

Savia Rocks: 0:59

So guys, I just want to say thank you for supporting the Us People podcast for the past five years. I really look forward to sharing another new theme song. Hello,

Stephen Ridley: 1:15

my name is Stephen Ridley. I am a musician. I built a school which makes it possible for everybody to learn music. Fun, fast and simple. And I am here with Savia Rocks on Us People podcast.

Savia Rocks: 1:32

Hey guys, welcome to another episode of the Us People podcast. I'm your host Savia Rocks Rocks. And today I am humbled to welcome back the lovely Stephen here with me, Stephen actually featured on the us people podcast and on the monthly spotlight in May. I don't know if he actually knows this, where we get to celebrate the creative beauty of us. Of different and each individual in their unique craft. Stephen has been on the podcast on season two. He was episode 69. Please go and check him out. Stephen is a humble yet beautiful music composer and musician. He's also the founder of the academy. So we're going to speak about that also. But Stephen, first of all, let me welcome you. to the ask people podcast space and also say thank you for coming back and Bracing us embracing us with your presence. How are you?

Stephen Ridley: 2:29

Miss rocks. It is too good to be back You know It's always present time with you is is unforgettable and uh just in the one minute before we before we recorded and we just said hello and I was like God your space is just lovely you are just a calming presence so I'm very happy to be here and thank you for having me on again and um you know such a pleasure to come and

Savia Rocks: 2:56

say you're more than welcome Stephen it's always a pleasure I was so glad to actually speak you know to Evan and say you know Welcome you back on the stage of, of the Ask People podcast, but even before I go there. I would love for people to know more about you who might not know more about you if they haven't had a chance to listen to the first episode of speaking to you. I kindly wanted to ask you to embrace us by telling us a bit about yourself and your background of where you grew up, but also how that influenced you to be the Steven who you are back. Yes. When I first met you, but also how you've evolved to be the Steven who you are today.

Stephen Ridley: 3:40

Yeah, um, well, sure. Um, so I come from the North of England, a tiny little village in South Yorkshire. There was only 40 people in my village. Um, I was born in Sheffield, but I grew up in the countryside. There was no kids. Um, my dad was the second youngest person after me and he traveled a lot. So, uh, it, you know, it was, it was a place to develop imagination. Um, I. I, you know, I spent most of my childhood. I'm sure I'm not alone. And I just didn't feel like I fit in anywhere. And I didn't know what my place was going to be. And I'd look at adults and I'm like, that's not that interesting to me. And look at all the different things you could do with your life as I was going through school. And I was like, none of that's really that interesting to me. And who's my team? Who's my tribe? What's my thing? And, uh, all I knew is my dad died when I was 15. We became extremely, extremely poor. I was going to this super fancy school on a scholarship. I didn't tell any of the other kids that I was on a scholarship and, uh, I was surrounded by all these kids. I had so much and I knew it didn't fit in with that crowd, but all I knew is I want what they've got. I don't really want to be like them, but you know, cold water every night, sharing food. I was like, I know. I know that I was happier when we were financially secure, so all I cared about was money. And I was like, until I've got that fixed, I don't really have the luxury to start thinking about other things. And the only way I, I didn't know anybody who had any money, so not personally. So I was like, well, the only way I know how to get money is to work hard at school'cause I'm at school. So how do you achieve success? You work hard at school and then you'll somehow get a good job. And so that's what I did. I worked hard at school. I went to a good university. I worked really hard at university. I left that. And um, and I got this job in an investment bank, top investment bank in the world, in the top team of that top investment bank. And I thought I'd made it. I thought, Oh my God, this is it. This is the lottery 2. 0. You know, calling my mom up, mom, pick out your Mercedes. Everything's going to be great. And this is all hypothetical because there was this distance in time from when I got told I got the job to when I started. And that little period was a very happy moment. Um, I went traveling around the world. I packed a backpack. I had no money whatsoever, but I was so certain for the first time ever that my future was going to be great. So I didn't care. I got two credit cards. I maxed them out and I went traveling with a backpack and um, I had such a great time going around the world and everywhere from Brazil to India to Hong Kong to Australia I just had the most amazing time and then it was time to start this job after You know that bliss period and I arrived ready to somehow have this thing called success not knowing what that is and It well, it looked like six screens on a desk and I was like, well, what are these for? What's this? What's And, and London, which had looked so glamorous to me, you know, imagine the village, the village kid coming to London and I'm standing in the square mile, I'm seeing all these skyscrapers, I'm like, Oh my God, it's like the TV shows. And then I realized something when I got to this office job that all of these amazing skyscrapers are just full of desks with computers on them and miserable people sitting at them who don't want to be there. And I'm one of these people now. And all of this, like, uh, supposed success that I was supposed to be experiencing, I wasn't experiencing any of that. I'm like, hold on a minute, I'm sitting there 18 to 20 hours a day, working on stuff I really don't care about, that has no meaning in the world, I make no difference to anyone's lives, and I'm doing this 7 days a week with no end in sight. And unlike school, where it's just for a summer, or just for a term, or just for a year, this is forever now. And, uh, And that was a really depressing moment. So I went through that. I didn't have the confidence to leave. I really, what else would I do? What else can I do? I don't know. I don't know anything about life. As you say, in Yorkshire, I knew, uh, I knew dick about shit. I didn't know. Yeah, I didn't know anything. So I was like, quit and do what? Like I look at all my friends. A lot of them were struggling to get jobs. A lot of them were in, in, in jobs paying like 20 percent of what this one was paying. I'm like, what am I going to do? I have no But after a year and a half of that, it started to get very, very intolerable. And by two years, I, I just decided to leave with no plan. And I left because I'd got a very naive little dream. And, and it was, I just wanted to put beauty in the world. I didn't know how. Maybe I'm going to make clothes. Maybe I'm going to write books. Maybe I'm gonna, you know, I didn't know what I was going to do. And I quit this job. I walked down the street and I see this piano in the side of the street in a thrift shop. And I was like, Oh my God, I just want that so much. That's so, so for the moment, the shell shock of quitting this safety net life for nothing. And, uh, I sit on the piano and I'm just playing my, playing my soul. And, um, A guy came up and he's like, look, if you want to play this piano, you got to buy it. And it was a hundred pounds. So I gave him a hundred pounds. I pull this piano into the street is massive, upright piano. And then I just started playing. I had no plan. Didn't know what I was going to do. I wasn't playing for anybody else in that moment. I was just, it was music therapy. And, uh, and I played and played and played. And, and as I'm playing, I started to feel very scared. And I thought, hold on a minute. I, that sixth sense that somebody's looking at you, which as a woman, I'm sure you've had that a lot more than I've had it.

Savia Rocks: 9:16

You'd be surprised, honey.

Stephen Ridley: 9:19

I wouldn't be that surprised. You know, well, us boys are not accustomed to that feeling. And, uh, but I start getting that feeling and I'm like, oh, this is weird. And I start feeling a bit scared and I realize, hold on a minute. I'm sitting here like a, like a mug. I'm, I'm in East London sitting on Brick Lane. I'm in a Prada suit with the Hermes tie, with the Rolex on. I'm like, I look like a target. I'm about to get robbed. And I'm playing this song and I'm like, they must be standing there waiting for me to finish this song. And so, I, I rapidly play up the piano. I punch the end of the piano and I spin round real fast. And as I spin round, there's about 800 people standing there. And they've all got the phones out and the jaws on the floor. And they are completely silent. And I'm silent and they're silent. I don't think Brick Lane's ever been so silent and uh, I was just, it was this moment that seemed to me to go on forever. It was probably about five seconds. And that five seconds was the, was the biggest turning point in my life because in those five seconds, I, one, I realized I'd done something for somebody else. Everybody's smiling at me. And, and everybody's just in this moment and I've done something and I'm like, what? And I've not done anything ever. All I've done is panic and then have a job that did nothing for anybody. And now I'm playing in the street and there's all these people and they're all looking at me and they're all moved in some way. And I'm moved and they're moved. And there's some kind of connection going on and I feel really beautiful. And this moment's really amazing. And then boom, they all start kind of clapping and I start crying. I'm not emotional. I'm not a crier and I can't help it. I'm convulsively crying and people are coming up and they're telling me their life stories. And I'm like, All of a sudden these people just opened up like, what is going on? And I realized I'd been valuable. And that was an amazing feeling. And I didn't know what it was. I just knew I wanted to do it again nervously and kind of, because I didn't know how to handle the situation. I just took my hat off as a joke and threw it on the floor. His hat piled up with coins and some notes. And I was like, hold on a minute. And, um, I jumped back on the piano and I played again and I've kind of been playing since. And, and from there, I've, I played all over the world since we last spoke. I've, I've played probably in total now about 80 countries or more. I've played for Royal families. I've played. There's so many, so, so, so many A list celebrity parties and these secret private things and this guy's yacht and this guy's palace. And I was just playing at this palace in Venice a couple of weeks ago. So I had this incredible, incredible word of mouth journey, really. And it's still this kind of word of mouth journey. And, um, and then I decided, so something that happened since we last spoke is I decided I wanted to build something bigger than me and that initial rush of being. That center of attention and and there's something to that. It's lovely. It's you feel like you're of service It feels like you that well for me at least I felt like a bit like a Dalai Lama I was like I I come in peace and all I've got to share is the most beautiful part of my soul For you and I sit in the street and you give something if you want you don't give something if you want you can carry On walking if you want I don't need anything You don't need, I'm just here to give. Take it if you want it. And it was the most beautiful thing in my entire career has been that. I've, I've gone around the world with that feeling. I'm not here to, I'm just here to give you the most beauty that I have in my soul. And I'm just, I just want to be a light. I just want to put goodness into the world. And this is the way that I can do it. And it's always been that flow. But I realized that I was confined in this box called me. It's a little 2x2 called Steven, and that's a very suffocating place for anybody to be. To be an individual is so small, it's so limiting, it's so artificial, and I decided, I want to do something a lot bigger than me, and I decided to follow up on what was the most common question I ever got asked, which is normally I would finish playing and people come up to me and they say, oh my god, that's so cool, I want to be able to play, how do you do it? Or they'd ask me how I learn, or how could they learn, or they'd tell me stories about how they used to try and play, or they did play for a couple of years, but they gave up and Everybody had the same story, which was, I want to play, but I've tried all these different forms of education and they've had all these different forms of failure. And then they've seen me play and it's kind of rekindled the desire, but they don't know how to do it. And I've been through traditional music classes. It was just absolutely awful. Yeah. I never made sense to me.

Savia Rocks: 13:50

You

Stephen Ridley: 13:51

did. Did you do that?

Savia Rocks: 13:52

Yeah, I did. When I, I done my piano lessons when I was about, I think 18, 17, 18. And then. I went on to become a songwriter for a lot of artists, which was a beautiful thing to do. But one thing I found is the teaching methods of playing the piano wasn't, it wasn't. Easy for someone who might have dyslexia or ADHD

Stephen Ridley: 14:21

or, you

Savia Rocks: 14:23

know, so even like, I know, I know you're going to go into it as well. I know you're going to go into how you do it. Go for it, Stephen. Go for it.

Stephen Ridley: 14:30

Well, I'm going to say if you didn't have ADHD before you try and learn piano, you're definitely going to have it after. Because, uh, like, I'm telling you, like, Like, like, I don't know what state I was in before, but I knew, I know after I had some acronyms and some letters and some numbers after my name, because it was horrible. It was, they're talking to me in Latin, I don't speak Latin. They're talking to me in Italian, I don't speak Italian. They've got squiggles all over everything, I don't speak squiggles. Everything was so theoretical and so disciplinarian and overwhelming and just, I was like, what is, why, why is the most fun subject in the world? This isn't geography, this isn't trigonometry, it's music. How can this be so dry, and so difficult, and so excluding? And, uh, so that was my experience too. And, and as it is for most people. And they're tried by these, you know, very complex methods of memorizing things, It's a long way from the goal that people have of just being at one with music, being able to connect, being able to just let your soul have an expression. None of that requires any of this over theorized pseudo intellectual nonsense. So then what do people do? Well, they either teach themselves, which takes, you know, a couple decades, or they Well, recently along came apps, along came YouTube, and Their big solution is, still basically you're gonna copy me, but this time with no understanding. So you're just gonna watch lights go down the screen, and, uh, You know, you can learn a party trick, and it's really cool. If you just sit there, and you slow it down, and you go through it, It's cool, it, it, that's cool, but it's not, It's diluting the subject. You're never gonna get beyond level two, piano, Copying lights going down the screen, because as soon as it gets To be complex or interesting, You're You know, there's too many lights. You can't focus on it all. It's just overwhelming and you don't know what you're doing. So it's kind of, it was a cool kind of way to give people a quick win, but it's not replacing the pain of actually, you know, getting to level 10 piano. So I decided I was going to build this new way and, um, I didn't imagine it was ever going to be what it is now. I, the pure intention in the beginning was to be able to pull people on stage during my shows. And then very quickly teach them in front of an audience that the whole audience would have a big win And then these people are going to play with me on a stage and that's how it started And that's what I did and I was doing it with people. Usually they didn't speak english. I'm in uzbekistan or you know, these Countries, I can't even point to on a map and i'm taking people out They don't even speak and I have to show them something so simple That they get playing and and the whole audience is there clapping and that's how it kind of started And then I was like, what if I could do more than just a party trick? You And I started just going full nerd, full nerd into, into music. And I looked up all those Italian words and I looked up what all of this is. And I realized that, you know, that obviously it's, it's true. It's just described horribly. And the description of it hasn't changed in 800 years. It's still taught in Latin. It's still taught with these medieval symbols. And I was like, well, Why don't I just communicate it like I communicate? Just simple, easy English, get rid of all of that, take out all the mumbo jumbo you don't need, and just focus on the purpose of it all. And the purpose of it all is to give someone all the tools they need to express themselves on piano. Play the songs they want, but don't play it like a robot, don't play it like just sitting there wooden with a piano teacher who's been drilling you to memorize it, but actually be able to play it as yours and be at one with the piano so that when you're there it's just, you're dancing with someone you love, you know? And, uh, that was it. So I built this, I built this. It took nine years to figure out a new way to teach, um, that would be fun, fast, and simple. They were the three things. It had to be fun, it had to be fast, it had to be simple. And I made this, I made this new way, and I refined it and refined it, and that took about nine years. And then I launched it four years ago, and, um, it again got refined and refined and refined, and Initially, I was like, Oh, we can do this in three minutes a day. And then I realized, no, no, no, we can't. And then through taking a few thousand people through actually ten minutes a day, we can though. Ten minutes a day was one thing to focus on every day. Yeah, we actually can. And it starts working and, and people start playing and they're all over the world. I've never met these people. And, um, during COVID, that was when I kind of, all my shows were canceled. So I was like, right, I'm going to lean into this a lot. And there's a lot of people stuck at home and they really wanted to learn. And so that was the first wave of students. And then by word of mouth, kind of all their friends start joining. And, and then a lot of the students would write to me and they're like, look, I don't like my life that much either. And what if I come and work for you and I'm a graphic designer, I can come and help you and someone else, I do marketing. Let me come and help you. And someone else comes and like, Oh, you know, I know how to do this thing. Let me come and help you. Now we have all these staff. There's probably about 35, 36 people right now who are working on it. And most of them came from being students. Um, we're over 30, 000 students now. Uh, in over 40 countries. Yeah, and, and it's the same flow though. It's the same flow as sitting in the street. It's just I want to show you something beautiful. But this time, rather than me be the artist, I can make an artist. And you be the artist and you go out into your local place and put some beauty into the world. And, and, and we've got people in Puerto Rico going and playing songs in their local church. And we got guys in Brazil going out and playing in the streets. And we've got, I was talking to this lady this morning, Maggie, and she plays in her church in America. And it's like just all these people are just going out into the world to places I've never even heard of. And now they're putting a little bit of beauty into their world. And, and that's what that is. And, uh. That's a really long winded who I am.

Savia Rocks: 20:14

No, that's not long winded. Do you know what? There are several things that I took from what you said. The first one was you finding your purpose. Sometimes we, we work our lives and we look at other people. We see how unhappy they are. We see that they don't live out their purpose. We see the pain within them because they're not getting to live out their purpose because they feel that they are suppressed and have to do something. Sometimes people you have to get permit life is a lot of people in the world don't realize that they feel that they have to get permission from somebody in order to fulfill their destiny. That is not true at all. Once we learn the power of self and who we are, Steve, in which I know you've learned, and I know you are still going through your journey of learning more and more. Once you have learned the power of being able to say to yourself, I dictate. What I want to do, what my self worth is and how I impact people in the world. Once you know and understand that power, you will influence so many people in the world that sometimes you may not even know that you're influencing them. And it's true. The articulation of words of melody of song of just looking at someone. There were so many ways to do it and you leave in your work in there because you found this purpose has now been able to help you embrace who you are. As a person, your academy helping, and that's what I call destiny. Destiny is a funny thing, and sometimes we don't always see it coming, but that's the spontaneity of it is, is the beauty of it. And That's what you done. You found that purpose. It's a long winded way of saying it, but it's a beautiful way of articulating it so that people understand it. And what you're doing now is you're giving a piece of you and your talent and your inspiration of how you do things creatively to different people all over the world. And it's like, there's a saying I have called continue the kindness. So If I do something for someone that might not have, instead of them giving it back to me, I say continue to kindness and give it to someone that needs it. So that way you're always continuing it onwards and onwards and onwards and that way it gets spreaded all over the world, even if you do not exist. And then that leaves a legacy that even when you're not here anymore, people are still doing it. So that's what you've done, Stephen. You found the purpose of life to be able to help people play the piano. If it's three minutes or ten minutes, it doesn't matter. The whole purpose is, is that They get to find the sole purpose of music theory of who they are and why they decided to do it.

Stephen Ridley: 23:17

So true. And, and, uh, I couldn't agree more with everything you've said. And honestly, so like, I'll get distracted by, is it a three minutes or is it a 10 minutes or is it this or that? It doesn't matter. Like people, you know, I, I love, I love Sting growing up. I love Meatloaf. I love the Rolling Stones. I love Nina Simone. I'd listen to Nina Simone and I'd be like, oh, and I'd, I'd sit there before I could play piano and sort of pretend I was a bit Nina Simone or dance in front of the mirror like kids do pretending to be Mick Jagger. What that is is it's a basic desire that I don't want to be stuck in the audience seat. I want to experience what your experience, I want to experience that freedom and joy and connection that you're displaying on the stage. I want to experience what it's like. When you're there with the eyes closed, and you're squinted, and you're in that place, I want to experience that place, and not from the passenger seat, not from the audience seat. And, uh, And I know I can, uh, look, when you stand on a stage and you look out, you can see people feeling that way. And there's little kids and they come up and they start, you know, dressing like you and doing their hair like you and But all of that is just, they want to experience that thing that you just demonstrated. And it's, it's almost cruel not to share in that. Like, it, it, it's cruel not to try and include people as much as possible to get them in a driving seat and, you know, it, and it's a funny thing, you know, everything you've just said is, is, is very interesting because I've never really introspected onto like, you know, what is, it's been a long time since I thought about what was my purpose. I thought about it a lot when I was working in the bank. I thought about it a lot when I was kind of miserable. But then life was very complicated and I was trying to figure it out and it was kind of like doing a math equation. It didn't make sense. And I was anxious and I'd think, think, think all the time. I don't really have that anymore. I just, I know what's right and wrong and I'm going to do what's right. And I'm not going to do what's wrong. And I've been doing that for so long now that I don't get tempted by the wrong anymore. The, do you want to come for a party? He's not tempting. And the, you know, the people dangling the carrot, it just doesn't tempt anymore. But equally the guy with the big stick doesn't tempt anymore. And it's just. I know what's right and wrong. It might benefit me. It might not, but I'm going to do what's right. Cause I like living in a way that I admire. I like being somebody I admire and, uh, I might not know always what the best thing to do is, but I know what I admire. I know what I look up to. I know what I find admirable. And if I, if I just go with that and I don't fight it and I don't think, Oh yeah, but what about if I just go with that? Win or lose, I'm doing what I think is right. And so you sleep easy and you wake up and you've got a smile on your soul. And it's, you're just, you're being you. You're being what you think is the best thing to do. And that can change and it can pivot, but that's really living. And everything else is a shade of what you were saying before, where you feel you need permission, you're waiting for someone to say it's okay, you're waiting for other people to do it so that you can copy or whatever it is. These are all just You're looking outside of yourself for what is right and wrong. And, and that comes from this uncertainty. And that uncertainty comes from not just jumping into life and having to go, not just, just picking something you want to do and doing it and failing and flopping and figuring it out and getting tempted by the easy way and getting tempted by the unethical way and then not doing that and going about it the right way and then pulling it off and feeling amazing that you did it the right way and you become over time more and more and more certain in your right and wrong kind of thermometer and and you get pretty good on that and then that's when you, you know, one of my favorite words in the English language is integrity. Integrity is simply knowing what you know and being willing to communicate it and

Savia Rocks: 27:04

the fact you said that

Stephen Ridley: 27:06

yeah and and that's I mean, you, you're an amazing example of it. Even what we're doing right now in this podcast, you, you want to share something beautiful with the world. And I'm sure it's not always easy for you. I'm sure there's times where you're like, Oh, okay, I'm going to keep this thing going. I don't know.

Savia Rocks: 27:23

But the thing that, the thing that keeps me going, Stephen, completely, honestly, is, is knowing that my voice is beautiful. a beautiful sentiment of purity and kindness and most of all humbleness. I live, you know, through, through humbleness throughout my whole life. And my grandmother taught me that. And, um, even if everything got taken away from me, I will always have my voice, you know, and that's an, that's an extreme part of, of who we are. You know, we have our voices, our souls, and with that we have power and power can be used in so many different forms. And that's possibly another thing I will talk to you about as well is you can use power your voice or your talent for good, or you can use it to manipulate and suppress. And it's up to us. And this is the thing about life. Everything about life is the choices that we decide to make. But within those choices, although we feel like we make mistakes, nothing in life is really a mistake. It's a lesson that we must learn in order to evolve. And that's what it is. Um, So that's basically, even when I feel that things are hard and I must push and, and people might sometimes judge you based upon how you look at, which is something I talk about all the time. The one thing that I love being able to do is when I use my voice, people just completely change. And that is the most beautiful thing I find in life is to be able to help people's minds open that little bit more to see things from a different perspective. And that's a beautiful thing, Steven.

Stephen Ridley: 29:24

Absolutely. You remind me of something which I was Just this morning talking about this, and I was saying that, you know, I'm aging, right? We all are. Aging good, by the

Savia Rocks: 29:36

way. Say aging good.

Stephen Ridley: 29:38

Aging good. Oh yeah, I'm aging good, all right. Good or bad, age is occurring, with or without my permission, it's happening. And I notice these changes in my body, and that's just what occurs. And this, yeah, and there's something initially that was invalidating about that, because, oh, well, I was used to this being a certain way, and it's not that way. This is just what happens as I age, right? Good. Ultimately, like, my physical form was something I created as a bit of an expression of me. The haircut I chose, the clothes I put on it, the way that I, like, take care of this body. It was, there was a bit of me in that body. Doesn't mean I am the body, but it's a bit of me. And now, it's kind of harder and harder to control because these, you know, the process of aging is like, oh, I didn't give permission for that. And hold on, I don't want that. And these things occur. Okay, great. So there's a limit to how much fluidity you can have as a body because this is piece of meat and we've got to carry it around and drive it around. Now your mind, some people are very influid in their mind. They get very fixed in their mind. They think it's a body. They think it's physical. They think it's hard to, to change and upgrade and improve. And, but your mind's also something you create. What is it? It's a furnishing of agreements that you make with yourself. It's a, it's a series of contracts you make with yourself about who you are and who you're going to be. And it's decisions and ideas and dreams and you make that. And as a kid, you're all in your imagination, putting it all there. And sometimes as an adult, you're the victim of that thing you created, forgetting that you created it in the first place, that it can be changed, that it can be improved, that it, but again, it's another tool of expressing yourself into the world. But then that brings this question, who are you? Because you're not the body. Is that something you kind of play with? It's a bit of an expression. And you're not the mind. And I'm not. Even my communication. I'm communicating to you right now, but I am the one communicating. I'm not the communication. I am the one, like, what I am is this creative force. I'm aware, I'm aware of being aware, and I can create. I can express. I can put forth an idea and a goal. I can put forth. That's magic. That's godly. It's divine. Like, What is a God? It's a force that creates. And who are we deep down when they say, Oh, you're made in God's image. I mean, I'm talking, we are, I, my own, own understanding of that statement is we are creative beings. We create a reality we create. And what's amazing. I mean, it's so obvious to say, but what the amazing side effect of that is that you can change and that you can improve and that you can be wrong. and then just back out and make a new decision. You can have a whole go at this huge big orchestral change and then you can figure out you know what that didn't really work and make another big orchestral change into the direction because you're not the effect of anything you are just this creative force and you can go into life and have a go and and and that's the joy of living. And most of the misery in the world is people are just not playing. They're just not in the game. They're just holding themselves back. They're not actually doing the things they want to do. They make one decision and then they make a decision in the direct opposite direction. I want to do this. Well, I definitely can't because blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'd love to learn to dance here, but I'm out of shape and I don't look good. And it's so embarrassing. Oh, I'd love to start a cafe. Oh, but cafes don't really make any money. And I've watched this documentary one time, but eight out of 10 businesses go out of business. Like as fast as you decide something, you undecide

Savia Rocks: 33:06

it.

Stephen Ridley: 33:07

And then what do you have? You have a It looks like a child who's been told they can't go outside. They're sulky, they're miserable, but they're going through life in this kind of Undetermined way, and it's just losing who you are. It's being convinced that you're something else. Other than this infinitely creative potential. A very aware, creative potential that can go out and put something into the world. And, uh It's something you demonstrate very beautifully and you bring on a lot of guests that demonstrate this. I think it's the core thing that your podcast constantly touches on is this, this fundamental capacity people have. And when, when you listen and it's really credit to you in this space that you create in this podcast for people to kind of explore these subjects, but you remind people that there is a space. Where they themselves detach from the world, detach from the expectations of others, detach from other people's ideas, and they can just find what is right for them, and have a go, just take a baby step in that direction. They can find counsel and solace and companionship with you and the people that come on this show of like, yeah, we want to live freely. And that doesn't mean six quadrillion dollars, it means making a decision and then Doing what you can to make it go right and having the fun of that adventure and uh You know, I want to start a new I'll give you an example, right? I you can complain about the area you live or you can start something there. There

Savia Rocks: 34:39

you go

Stephen Ridley: 34:40

Yeah, I lived in finsey park. I didn't like it because there was tons of homeless people. It was real dangerous and You know, I didn't like it. There's a, and I was like, well, what am I doing about it? I'm doing nothing. Well, what would I like to do if I didn't feel I was a victim of life? What would I do here? I was like, you know, I do. I go and I go and be like brothers with these guys. I go and make friends with them. And, uh, there's this one guy down there called Angel. He's still there in Finsbury Park. He's an amazing singer. I was like, you know, I do a jam with that guy. And I'd bring us all together and I'd start, I'd start a community movement so that they've got something to do with and just sit around because if I was in that situation and that's what I went and did and I built this little thing and then they made bands and then they were playing music and didn't feel dangerous anymore at all. In fact, it was, it was wonderful. You come out of Finsbury Park tube station, you go left under the bridge, there's a bunch of guys playing music and people stop and some people sing and this guy's from his local group and he's singing this lady just comes out of nowhere and she's great. And

Savia Rocks: 35:34

yeah.

Stephen Ridley: 35:36

But that just started as an idea in the mind and had a million reasons I shouldn't do it, and why it's a stupid thing to do, and oh, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm rambling. I'm, but, but I'm rambling to try. And

Savia Rocks: 35:45

it's, it's, it's, it's, it's not even that you are just saying things that are coming from your heart that are, are truth and, and truth is the most important thing that you can always say. And when it's spontaneous, that means it is truth. We both here have nothing to prove apart from the honesty of ourselves and. Even when I'm doing a show with people, the most beautiful thing is to be able to highlight people's lives where nobody else would give them that chance to highlight their life. And, and that in itself is an amazing thing to, to be able to do. Like you said, it's, and what you're doing with bringing people and letting them have music, music connects people's souls. You know, and, and poetry connects people's souls. And there are so many other ways to ways to do this. So it's a beautiful thing of what you're doing. It's the academy is an amazing thing of what you're doing, because it's like, say for example, in 10 years time, even 10 years from now, and you might have a hundred thousand students or maybe even more than that, you know, imagine The stories that people will be able to tell and sing about and and people who thought in their minds that they wouldn't be able to come and become an artist in an industry that is so competitive are able to become that artist that they've always wanted to be through your academy and of what you do. And that in itself. Is awesome. So that's from me to you. Yeah. To say what you're doing is awesome and keep on doing it. There are always going to be people in life that are gonna have their opinions, Steven of you, and of what you do. But at the same time, if they believe that they have another method, then they should pull it together and go and do it. Um,

Stephen Ridley: 37:38

and I hope they do. This is exactly how I feel. It's not a com. Yeah, it's not a competitive field. Like I want a lot of people to do this. My brother's a great builder. I wish he'd share his knowledge. I'd love to, I'd love to know more. I, I want people to do well. I want, there's a lady who's on my course. I was chatting through yesterday. She's called Wendy and she works in a hospice. So, you know, for 20 years, she's dealing with people that are on the way out. That's a heavy job. It's a heavy thing to build these connections with that, with that cloud constantly there that, you know, There's a time limit to this relationship. And she said that over the years of doing this, you know, she went into it because she'd lost someone very close to her who died in the hospice. And she was so in, in awe and admiration of the people that work there that she wanted to join and help. And she joined and then she's like, you know, I joined this one from such a pure place from such a profound love of humanity, but through being there now 20 years, I've become closed, I've stopped myself forming connection because it's so painful to lose it over and over and over and over and over again. And so she came on to this course, not because she wants to, you know, go and play on stages or anything. She just wanted as she would call it this music therapy type thing. But what she ended up doing is Even more beautiful. And this is why I'm like, I hope a lot of people do that. I, you know, I have no sense of competition. If everybody is as open as this, we have a beautiful world tomorrow. And, uh, she went, she, she learned how to play piano and she decided that what she was going to do is put a piano in the hospice. And, uh, we were having this zoom call and she, she's calling me from the hospice and she's like, Oh yeah. Like now I play to people and I feel like I can do something. Like what was upsetting to me before is there's nothing I can do about it. There's nothing. And then I'm giving people off in these drugs and I don't even really want to be given the drugs. I don't know how much I agree with these drugs, but now I sit down and I play and then people just suddenly start telling me stories. And I know how that feels. Cause when I was on the street, that would happen to me. Like you play and people just come up to you and start sharing their soul because you touched a piece of theirs. So she's having that, right? She goes home. Her husband's a really serious guy and he's, uh, got the early stages of Parkinson's. So she's kind of dealing with that. And he's, he's quite a serious dude. He's an accountant. So she gets him going through this program and, uh, now he's gone through it and now he sits there and plays. And she's just telling me this story. Now, I might never have met. She's called Wendy. I might never have met this lady, Wendy. I might never have heard that feedback. I'd never know that I did that that I had some small part and not just her life, but everybody else who passes through and the husband and probably got friends and family that come in, maybe the grandkids are going to learn. And, uh, What a beautiful thing to create. And by the same token, we're speaking today and you don't know everybody who's listening and you don't know what they're going through and neither do I. And maybe just, maybe we find some people and they go, you know what? And they just make one good decision today. One pro survival. You know what? I'm going to try this decision. And then who knows the rick, the ricochet effect that that's going to have on them and everybody around them. You know what? Maybe I can be a bit more of service. You know what? Maybe I can be more valuable than I'm being to the world. Maybe I can, you know, we all wake up in the morning. Netflix is full of like murder confessions and the Nazis this and people look at it like it's like it's unbelievable. And I look at this and I'm like, look, you could be a murderer. You could be, I could be, I could be Hitler if I wanted to be. It's a decision. I could also be Gandhi.

Savia Rocks: 41:07

And

Stephen Ridley: 41:08

so could you. You could be Mother Teresa. You could be the greatest that ever lived. You can be either of those things. It's not that evil is beyond you. You could be evil if you wanted to be. But by the same token, you could be good beyond good. And I don't mean walking around with a halo being goody two shoes. I mean, actually going out and providing value into the world. And the most amazing thing is, it just seems to ricochet and echo in ways that you don't expect, and that's a happy life. And, uh, I have nothing more to say than that, really. I have nothing to, nothing to share beyond, beyond that hope for anyone who's listening. And, you know, you have such an amazing capacity to put something into the world, no matter what you're doing. And, and that thing can be, you know, we're a group, we're a group on a little rock floating in the middle of a vast nothing. It's just nothing but infinite death in all directions and somehow this is tiny bit of life. On this tiny little rock floating in this middle of nowhere. And we're all here. And you go to Starbucks and someone gives you a coffee, which in itself is nuts. You just walk in and they give you a coffee and then you walk down the road and someone's cleaning the road for you. So it's clean and you get on the tube and someone's driving the tube for you. So you can get where you want to go. And you go to the store and someone serves you because they want you to make sure that you get the stuff that you want. And while you're in the stores, there's beautiful music playing and somebody made that for you just so that experience could be a bit more beautiful. And the whole world is contributing to you, contributing to you, contributing to

Savia Rocks: 42:35

you. You walk in Hyde Park.

Stephen Ridley: 42:37

Right. Walk in Hyde Park, it's beautiful. A groundskeeper made it that way. You see all the ducks? Somebody put the ducks there. Like, all this life is created by the contributions of a group, and you can contribute to that group. And the more you do, the freer you are. Ironically, the more you do The more of the other stuff comes, you get money because money is just something which is an exchange factor. If you give enough coffees, you know, Starbucks makes a lot of coffees. That's why they have a lot of money, but it starts with giving the coffee. It starts with having something to give. And, and you can do that through a pure heart. You can do that just to get the money. It didn't really matter. Just do it. Just put yourself out into the world and that's value. And then you feel valuable. Because what do you call someone who can't be used? You call them useless. And nobody wants to be useless. And what do you call somebody who brings value? You call them valuable. Value able. Able to be of value. And it's a superpower that we all have. And, uh, And, you know, I'm not trying to I am preaching. But, I'm not I just, it's I found it to be true and I've been on this earth now 35 years and I learn it more and more and more. And I have no intention of being special. I have no intention of being the only one. I'm not that interested in being a star. The celebrity thing is boring. Like, all that social media nonsense. It's just, whatever. It's distracting. But, I know who we are. And I meet people. And I love people. And so that's why I'm here.

Savia Rocks: 44:07

I have a question for you, Stephen. When I toad, A few of my friends that I was going to speak to you, one of them asked me a question. So I said, so I said, run the question. So they, they asked me the question and I said, I would ask you,

Stephen Ridley: 44:19

one

Savia Rocks: 44:21

of my friends played a piano. It might be a story that you've heard before and they, and they used to play it really beautifully. Then for some reason, life kitchen. And it was like their existence of musical talent got wiped away. Now they can't play the piano anymore and they're wondering why. I said, I will ask you why just to see what your outlook would be and the advice that you could possibly give them. Cause I know there are people in the world who are most probably going through this same thing. What would your advice be to them?

Stephen Ridley: 45:01

I would ask more questions to find out exactly. But from what you just said, there, there's two big things that jump out. The most common thing, the most common thing is that the way people learn the first time, whether your friend probably learns, because this is what all like, whether using apps, YouTube or traditional lessons, they're based on memorizing. And that would be, you know, that's when you sit there and the teacher says, do this and this, and you copy it, you keep it in your head. It's a memory game. And that's not how we learn anything well. Like, when you learn English, that isn't how you learn English. And if you did learn English through memorizing, well, what would it be? It would be copying what I'm doing right now. So I'm speaking, and you'd copy the sounds I'm making. And you'd have to practice hours and hours every day to be able to do that. I mean, it would be, which is exactly what you have to do on piano, right? In the traditional way. So you practice hours and hours on this copying game. And eventually, if you practiced enough, you'd be able to copy me. And you would speak, and people would think, wow, you speak English. And they might clap, and they'd go, wow, that's so amazing. And, but the thing is, you don't really speak English. You're copying someone who speaks English. And so what does that mean? It means you don't, you can't think with the language, you can't express yourself with the language, you can't form your own sentences, and this is where we get the people that can play sheet music but they can't write their own music, where they can read music but they can't improvise anything by themselves, where they can't play by ear. What do you mean you can't play by ear? That's like me listening to you say a sentence and I can't say it back to you. It's, it's, it shows this like, huge disconnect with the language that you're using. If people said this about English, you would look at them funny. If they said, oh, well, you know, I can read it, but I can't make up my own. Uh, you know, I, I can't, I can't speak by ear. I can't, I can't, uh, these are wild statements. But it points to the fact that people are learning in a bit of a funky way. And that's the most common thing that I see. So, the, the solution to that particular problem is this new method I built. And the new method I built is very easy to explain. It's, you focus on one individual step at a time. And this isn't memorizing something. It's not sitting there and copying something. It's learning how to do a skill. So I'll give you a very funny example, but learning how to use the pedal on the right hand side. Okay. That's an action and it's a skill, much like driving a car. You've got to press it. You've got to lift it up. And it does something when you do that. So you learn how to do that. You learn the effect it creates. In isolation, and then boom, you know how to do it. Now you can apply that not just to one song, you can apply it to every song you'll ever play. You're not memorizing that, it's now just something you can do. And after you've focused on doing it for just 5 10 minutes, you can do it without thinking for the rest of your life. And we can do the same with like, the hand movements of piano. If I just get you to focus on the hand movements of piano, and that's the only thing we focus on. I call it hand yoga and I'm going to make your hands like supple and flexible and be able to move like a pianist. There are these unique movements we do with our hands on piano. So I'm going to teach you those movements in isolation and with just a short amount of practice because you're so focused on it and it's so simple. Good, you can do that and you can now do those movements on any song for the rest of time. And if we break down music in this way to these hyper simple little boxes, And we take people on a very specific order. It's got to be in the correct gradient. Well, then one step at a time, they, they accidentally are learning to do music and, but they're learning to do it. They're not copying it. They're learning to do it. And then that's the equivalent of then speaking English is I'm giving you the tools to be able to speak that language, express yourself in that language, use it as a tool. With which you find and communicate your individuality. So that's the first reason someone would lose it. The second reason someone would lose it is invalidation. And invalidation can come from self. But if it does come from self, it always started outside. Nobody originates their own self invalidation. A kid doesn't do that. A kid doesn't walk around saying, I can't do this. I can't do that. Kids believe in superheroes. Kids think they can fly. Kids think they can change the world by pointing at it. Kids believe in magic. Like, that's, that's who we are before it gets crushed out of us, before it gets, grow up, before we get told these, you know, grow up, get a job, pay taxes, be serious, be an adult, stop mucking around, stop being a kid, you just get beat down into this, accept, all those statements, by the way, is accept this reality, accept this reality, accept this reality, stop creating your own, stop believing in magic, stop saying silly things, Stop being happy when I'm not happy. Stop being playful when I don't feel playful. Stop being energetic when I don't feel energetic. Accept my reality. Accept my reality or else. Or else what? Or else you don't get fed. Or else you don't get clothed. Or else you don't get attention. Or else you don't get affinity. Or else you don't get let into the cool club at school. Or else you don't get let into the private members club in London. Like, it's all just accept this reality or else. And it stifles people. It invalidates their creativeness. It invalidates their ability. to postulate, create their own reality, to create their own feelings, to create their own state of being. And then I run into adults who are in their mid fifties and they joined this program. They don't believe they can do that. They've now lost the belief that they can create their own state of existence. And, and if you're in that situation, how on earth are you going to be able to use a tool which is made for you to be able to express your individuality? You don't even know your individuality anymore. And so, The solution to that and the journey of that is just to get people to play and let the tool of piano teach you who you are. Let the tool of piano get you playing again, get you childlike again, get you curious, get you fumbling with little sounds. And I take people on this. I never tell them this is the right note. This is the wrong note. I never tell them you can't do that. I just, people tell me what they want to do and I show them how to do it. And I just, I just work with what they want to do. I want to play jazz. Good. Here's how you do it. I want to play soul. Here's how you do it. I want to just fumble around. Good. Here's how you do it. Why? Because i'm trying to nurture Their own sense of self determinism. I want them to be able to decide something, them to be able to imagine something, and then just enable them to go and do it. And if we do that enough times, they start to get confidence in their own creativity. Again, they get confidence in their own imagination. They get confidence, which is the opposite of invalidation, right? It's that that's how you build somebody up. And if you build them up enough, creativity just comes. And if you look in any great rock star, look in any great musician, looking anyone who's great in music, they had an almost delusional sense of self belief at some point. They believe, Elvis believed he could be Elvis, before he went onto the stage and did that thing that made the whole world shake, before Freddie Mercury went onto the stage and pumped his fist, he imagined doing that, and he had enough delusional self belief to go and do it, and he did it, and it changed the world, and that's, it, it, it, you know what I mean? So, there's two reasons that could be causing that in your friend, and both of them are easily solved.

Savia Rocks: 51:58

I love that. Thank you for saying that. I hope it helps them and I hope it helps many other people in the world who want to hear it. Steven, we have been on here for, time has flown. Time has flown. And I know I could talk to you most probably for another couple hours and it would just fly by so easily.

Stephen Ridley: 52:18

It will. It's lovely. I do.

Savia Rocks: 52:22

I do want to thank you for coming on the show. But before. I end the podcast. I do want to let people know where they can find you. Please tell us where people can find you or have a conversation with you or just embrace your energy of who you are as a being.

Stephen Ridley: 52:41

Yeah, I look, I love to respond to DMS. Uh, you can find me on Instagram. It's Stephen with a P H S T E P H E N Ridley, R I D L E Y. Um, Steven like Steven Spielberg, Ridley like Ridley Scott. Um, Steven Ridley on Instagram, I get a lot of DMs, I sit in the evening, I'll respond to them frequently, so if ever you want to reach out, you got a good chance of finding me there. And, um, for the school, it's RidleyAcademy. com. Um, you can't really miss us. Uh, Ridley Academy. I've started making funny videos on Instagram for the school, and I think that Instagram's Ridley Academy as well.

Savia Rocks: 53:19

Awesome.

Stephen Ridley: 53:19

And that's it. That's it. I'm here to be a friend. So if anyone wants an extra friend, I'm here.

Savia Rocks: 53:24

Oh, Stephen, I want to thank you so much for coming on the ask people podcast again for blessing us with your energy, your talent, but most of all, just being who you are as a person. Thank you so much.

Stephen Ridley: 53:38

Thank you

Savia Rocks: 53:39

guys. Really, really

Stephen Ridley: 53:40

lovely to talk to you.

Savia Rocks: 53:41

And you too. Definitely. And you too, guys. I want to thank you so much for listening to the ask people podcast. And please remember you can subscribe and leave us a review on Spotify, iTunes, YouTube, or Google play or any other platforms that you prefer listening to. I love the birds in the background, by the way, sounds awesome. Sounds so nice. Please follow us on Facebook. Instagram and Twitter, and you can also find us on this Sav U Roc's website or on the Us People podcast website. Guys, thank you so much for listening. Stay happy, stay positive, and as always, please. Continue to be kind to one another, take care. Oh yeah, set me free so I can solve your journey. Just move on so

Stephen Ridley: 55:04

you can be free. That was amazing. Love your sign off is just so hope. It's just such a message of hope. I really love what you're doing. This is such a positive thing for the world.

Savia Rocks: 55:20

If you try redirect you, you'll see yes, if you try a. Spread your wings and let the wind glide you high We're just soaring through this journey leaving fear far behind Oh, so full of courage, you can win if you try We got red pay, yes to you, you'll see the power, yes, if you try I'm fly like I'm Superman Spread your wings and let them wings fly I'm fly like I'm Superman Spread your wings and let them wings fly