Money, Money, Money: Kiss Debt Goodbye, Dive into Investing, and Master the Art of Old Money Living - With Amber Franhuizen

 Amber from the Old Money Podcast  and I as we dive into elevating your personal finance game with a dash of it-girl elegance! We'll unravel the secrets to wealth accumulation, debt elimination, and savvy investments. Discover how freezing your spending can bring about financial discipline and style. Plus, learn about a chic banking structure that earns interest effortlessly. With strategies to tackle debt and demystify investing, this episode is your ticket to mastering money management with grace and flair. Tune in for advice that's rich, insightful, and undeniably fabulous!
Amber's IG:
@amberincalifornia

Old Money Podcast's IG:
@oldmoneypodcast/?hl=en

Listen to Old Money Podcast:
Old Money Podcast

Amber Frankhuizen, is someone whose story goes beyond the traditional confines of a LinkedIn bio. While her LinkedIn bio may paint a picture of a standard executive, Amber's journey is far from ordinary. Behind the title lies a visionary leader who founded AFMKTG to fill an unmet need in the market, merging the realms of art and real estate development. With a passion for placemaking and storytelling, Amber has not only led AFMKTG to win awards but has also cultivated a reputation for creating edgy and elevated brands.

Her unique perspective and mission are a breath of fresh air in the world of finance and business. Beyond the typical CEO title, Amber is on a mission to heal the financial fight-or-flight response by providing easy investing techniques for beginners and taking the fear out of managing one's finances. She believes in the power of consciously spending to enhance the quality of life and advocates for living the life of your dreams without breaking the bank. Amber also specializes in creating additional revenue streams and shares invaluable insights into navigating the world of luxury business. From decoding the language of luxury to exploring what luxury means across various industries, her expertise in luxury marketing and sales is unparalleled. If you're looking for an engaging guest who can seamlessly discuss anything from financial empowerment to the glitz of anything Bravo and the intricacies of luxury, Amber is your gal. 

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

Hi guys, and welcome back to Confessions of a Wanna Be it Girl, today's episode. I am so excited for it because it is so highly requested from you guys and we are going to be talking about money, money, money. We're talking about money. I think there's so many questions about how we can all be rich, how we can all be out of debt, how the fuck do we start investing? It is super overwhelming. And it girl lifestyle having money, a shopping addiction all those things seem to go hand in hand. We are diving into an episode to talk about how to get ourselves out of debt, how to save and invest and, of course, live that money mindset life. We are joined by Amber from the Old Money Podcast to talk about how to actionably take these steps. She really breaks it down for us, making it simple and easy, about how to get ourselves out of debt. She gives amazing analogies that I think we can all understand. So, guys, let's dive into this episode with Amber from the Old Money Podcast. Let's go.

Speaker 1: 1:11

Welcome to Confessions of a Wanna Be it Girl. I'm your host, marley Fraging, and I'm here to help you filter out all the bullshit and become the next it girl. This podcast explores the reality of what it really takes to make it out there. As it turns out, it is way less Instagrammable than I thought it was going to be. I'm still very much a work in progress, but there's simply nothing else I'd rather be doing than chasing my dreams. So let's learn from my mistakes and work together to achieve our dreams with more confidence, clarity and direction. Let's get after it All right. Well, welcome, Amber to the podcast. I'm so excited to have you today.

Speaker 2: 1:50

I'm so excited to be here. I feel like the energy of it girls and rich girls. It's the same vibe. We're all the same.

Speaker 1: 1:57

I also love. I think we are both a beautiful blend of California Valley Girl and East Coast Mindset, so this is just going to be a lot of fun. So, amber, for you, money isn't just about the actual money, it's about the mindset hence the podcast name, old Money which helps you live and feel that old money lifestyle. So I'm just so excited to dive in. Thanks, me too. So there's a couple of things I think. When we talk about money, I think here are the three big questions how can I be rich, how can I get out of debt, and where in the world do I learn how to start investing? So we're going to start with debt, because I think that's step one. Okay, great, absolutely. So how do we get out of debt?

Speaker 2: 2:53

It's such an important question. I mean, I've been in debt. All of us have been in debt, probably at one point or the other, and you can't start building real wealth until you're out of debt. Like if you are paying your money to borrow money, like that's not rich, right. So getting out of debt is really overwhelming. I think a lot of people have a lot of emotional baggage that comes with that too. I know I felt a lot of shame and embarrassment about being in debt and at one point I was like five figures in debt and I didn't want to tell anybody. I was so embarrassed. But we're legit. All in debt, right?

Speaker 2: 3:27

It's expensive to live, and when I think about debt, there is a couple of different things. Number one you either have a savings problem or a spending problem. But with the spending problem it's kind of like OK, we're living in an expensive society problem, so how do we manage that? So the reason I say we have a savings problem to start with is because if you are in debt because you had an emergency that you couldn't cover or something happened where you needed to use a credit card in order to cover something, that means you didn't have an emergency fund in place to be able to take care of that. So that's issue number one. Issue number two is going to be you have a spending problem, and that's what I had. Like I think Sephora is going to solve all my problems. Like here I go every time, right, and then it's $200 there, $300 there, and then on top of that, you're paying interest in order to borrow the money to spend to make yourself feel better.

Speaker 2: 4:17

So the spending problem is not necessarily just like you're weak or you have an issue with shopping. It's like what's going on underneath that emotional layer. So that's what I really like to dive into, especially on the podcast and with my therapist, because what's driving us to spend? It's like I wasn't feeling enough. I was feeling like I needed to buy a new outfit every time I went out because what I had wasn't good enough. All these internal pressures, and then, of course, as I mentioned, it's expensive to exist, and so how do we cope with that? Like the world is changing, so our expectations of how we're going to live is going to change. This is happening on a cultural scale. So when I was getting out of debt, I did some pretty drastic things. Some of them are kind of weird.

Speaker 1: 5:03

I'll tell you a little bit we love weird.

Speaker 2: 5:04

We welcome weird OK here's the weirdest thing, marley. When I was really having a spending problem, I put my credit cards into a plastic baggie, filled it with water and stuck it in the freezer. I legit froze my credit cards in a block of ice.

Speaker 1: 5:20

That's so metaphorical and physical. It's so funny.

Speaker 2: 5:24

Exactly. But I was also the girl. I knew my credit card number by heart. So if somebody was like, turn off the auto pay or take off Apple Pay, no problem, babe, I know my credit card number and the CCB code. I knew it in my head. So I was still online shopping. So I had to get new credit cards and then I froze them in the freezer and I thought if I'm really going to need to use a credit card, it's going to be only for an emergency and I'm going to get a freaking hammer and break that piece of ice open.

Speaker 2: 5:49

To get it OK, I had to create like stop and like barriers for myself. So that was one thing. The other thing was I got a roommate and I'm an only child. It was so big for me. Are you really OK? I'm not the same person. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm loving the vibe.

Speaker 2: 6:04

Yeah, getting a roommate was so painful for me, honestly, but I had to do it in order to make drastic changes in what my expenses were, and it was through that process that I was able to start saving money and getting out of debt. And then I started my business, I started freelancing, I started offering massive value. So I was going through all of this. I was working through it in therapy and then I also, for the first time, started to actually make what I think budget is like a really icky word. I hate the word budget, so I like to call it a money map, like I started following my money map of where I'm going to put all of my money. Everything that I earn I get to own where it goes. So I'm going to map it out and be super specific.

Speaker 1: 6:44

So OK, first step one would maybe be looking at the emotional issues behind our spending. Or shit happens things that the fan, like the pet, goes to the hospital money. The limit does not exist on what I'm going to spend to keep my pet happy, healthy alive what not?

Speaker 1: 7:03

So, looking at the issues scoping back then, would step two maybe be adjusting your lifestyle. Like you took on the roomie, what not? So then step three, which is maybe where I think the third one goes, because, if you can't tell, I'm working through this live with you is working with your savings and checkings account a little bit different. I've heard you talk about a way you organize your accounts. Can you tell us about that?

Speaker 2: 7:34

I would love to, and, marley, you're totally on track. It's like addressing emotional issues. Yeah, yes, girl, addressing emotional issues, looking at your spending and your habits, making changes and starting to really be intentional about where your money goes. And this is my number one thing is intention, and so bank accounts, for example. This is how I set up my bank accounts. Like, I have a very simple system and this is what I recommend for everybody, because there's a million ways to complicate it, and then there's just a way that works and it's very simple.

Speaker 2: 8:03

So you have a checking account. Everybody has a checking account, right? That's where your paycheck gets deposited. And typically, when you have a checking account, you also need to have a savings account with it. It's kind of like a deal with the bank. You go to Wells Fargo, chase, your credit union. They're going to say you want a checking account, you have to have a savings account.

Speaker 2: 8:18

I totally ignore that savings account. I just put the minimum in it. It just sits there. Whatever, I don't care. I have one credit card and one credit card only, and it's just the one that I get the best deals on the best points, on whatever it might be when you get into more advanced levels of finance. Sure, you can talk about credit card hacking, but right now we're just keeping it simple.

Speaker 2: 8:35

But here's the real thing and this is what you love is the high-yield savings accounts. Okay, high-yield savings means you're getting a better rate on your savings than you would just at Chase or Wells Fargo, whatever. And Wells Fargo they give you a penny to keep your money there. You're like thanks, babe, not helpful. But when you pick a high-yield savings account and there's so many out there I recommend going to Nerd Wallet or Bankrate to just Google high-yield savings account. I personally use Capital One. You can set up all of these sub-accounts in your savings accounts.

Speaker 2: 9:05

So what I do is I have savings account for, like you mentioned, I have a savings account for my dog's healthcare. I have a savings account for my Botox. I have a savings account for vacations, savings accounts for what I call designer splurges, like when I'm saving for a purse. My money goes in that account, so it's all earmarked and it's all in its own special little place, so that I am delegating money that I earn specifically to where I want it to go, because people think savings is like so boring. It's like oh, you're saving for a rainy day. Yes, you need to have an emergency fund, but like no, that's not what I'm saving for. I'm saving so I can live my best life and put my money intentionally where I want it to go, where I want to spend it.

Speaker 1: 9:41

I love this idea because are you familiar with those TikTok videos of usually the woman having that binder and they're like stashing cash and yes yes, it's the virtual real, not that that's not real, but more like adults, easy to move money. Version of that to me is like we're putting it in each folder and so, while you're putting, if you're in debt, can, should we start making these earmark folders, or should we wait till we're out of debt?

Speaker 2: 10:12

Okay, yeah, start them 100%, and I think the thing is like it's psychological, like again I, we're human beings, we're not these machines that are just like zeros and ones right Like there's a lot of emotion with money, there's a lot of feelings with money. If you don't have money, if you like, you're putting every last penny into just paying off your debt. Like what a sad existence. Like that is not what an old money life is, and old money life is living well, but being really intentional and responsible. So, yes, we're paying down our debt. We're paying more than the minimums to, and we're also paying ourselves first. I want you to pay you first. Like do not pay your credit card companies first.

Speaker 2: 10:47

Obviously, make your payments on time, but what I mean by that is like you want to live your life. So the difference between you know just going about your day and racking up more debt is I see a lot of people just like close their eyes and swipe and like hope for the best, right, but with a money map or with planning out where you're going to put your expenses, you're going to be able to get super intentional about making the purchases that are going to improve your life. So that means, for example, I'm going to budget for I hate the word budget, but you know what I mean two happy hours this month and I'm going to look forward to those. I'm going to like go all out for those. Those are going to be my things, instead of ordering door dash 15 times because I'm too lazy to cook. It's just looking one step ahead and planning that out.

Speaker 2: 11:30

But yes, to answer your question 100%, you need to be saving and as it relates to what we're saving for number one, an emergency fund is super important. So when something bad happens, you have money to cover it. That's not going to put you into more debt. So, like you said, if your cat gets sick like there's nothing I'm not doing for my dog, you're right Like anything that needs to happen at least I have that emergency fund. The good way to start is just get $1,000 in that emergency fund. Then you can start funding other things. Then you want to shoot for, as you're building all of your savings, three months of living expenses and then six months, et cetera.

Speaker 1: 12:03

So, as you are building that percent, say you get a paycheck, you know, twice a month, every other week what percent of that paycheck should you be putting towards if you're in debt already? Should, like 70% go to debt and then the other 30 go to savings? Like, what's the best way to like, look at money as it comes in.

Speaker 2: 12:26

It's such a good question. I hate to give you this ambiguous answer, but there is no right answer and the reason for that and this is the thing that I hate about like today's money pendants you have, like Dave Ramsey yelling at you and telling you to cut up your credit card, susie Ormans, and such a bad mood, like stop. Like we're humans, like let's be real. And there is no one formula. And the reason I say that is because, depending on where you're at in your life maybe you're a student, maybe you're a new mom, maybe you have one job, maybe you have two jobs it's going to determine, like all those situational factors are going to determine what you can do with your money, right? So I think the biggest thing is getting your monthly living expenses as low as possible, within reason. Please don't live on rice and beans. Like we need a vegetable, okay. Like eat well, take care of yourself, make sure you're still exercising. Like do what you need to. But do you need the equinox membership? Or do you just need a new pair of running shoes every three months? So asking yourself these questions to get your living expenses down as much as possible, the rule of thumb for saving is anywhere from 10% or more of your take home pay.

Speaker 2: 13:26

I am in a season right now where I'm saving 30% of my take home pay every single month. Savings is my jam, it's all I care about and, again, remember, it's going to bigger purchases. So all that means is like I'm not blowing a bunch of money on Amazon, I'm not going to target and buying new sheets every month. I'm just oh, that's right, I took this money out of my account. I put it someplace intentional where I want to spend Botox, which I'm getting tomorrow. I don't know if you can tell, but like the forehead is the forehead is not cute right now.

Speaker 2: 13:55

So what we're working on is just getting really intentional about where we put our money. So we put it where we want it to be, and what I do for that, marley, is after you get your emergency fund set up, whether you get your paycheck once a month or twice a month, on the day your paycheck drops in your checking account you have set up and you can do this through the savings accounts like Capital One automatic withdrawals from your checking account so you never even see the money that goes into savings, so you never feel like you lost it. It just like skims off the top. There it goes, goodbye, and it's just gone.

Speaker 1: 14:26

And you're like and that was wonderful and thank you so much. And I think that's great to automate things because we don't need to be staring at those numbers every day. We can like let's grow, let's grow, let's grow them, because that will also, I think, counterintuitively gets us thinking like I'm not doing enough, or I'm not doing doing enough to grow those numbers.

Speaker 1: 14:48

So I think anytime you cannot look at that bank account while knowing you're doing your things is great. So let's pretend that you are out of debt and what's the next step? Is the next step investing? Where on earth do you start, like? I mean, I feel like the education around investing is so little like something you don't learn in school at all 100%.

Speaker 2: 15:17

Yes. After you're out of debt, what you want to focus on is building your wealth. Right, you know, I look at being in debt as being like underground, like you're in a grave, and then, once you get to baseline, to zero, you can actually start building your wealth on top of a solid foundation. Right, solid foundation meaning you have like a little savings, you have an emergency fund, you're living your life and now we're investing. And then when we get to the investing and you're asking about percentages here, again, 10% minimum of your take home pay, and then whatever else you can really spare, because the reality is is that investing can be kind of fun. And here's the big like misconception about investing.

Speaker 2: 15:55

I think the girlies think that if you want to be good at investing, you have to, like have CNBC on. You have to be watching ticker tape. You have to know what's going on. Like no, turn it off. Turn off the news, it's bad for your cortisol. Like we don't want to see it. Okay, do not have the news on, do not. We don't need to follow everything. You don't need to know everything that's going on to be successful in the stock market. It's the exact same thing as, like setting up your bank accounts or getting out of debt, it can be really complicated. It can be really simple. Driving a formula one car, building one, racing it is really complicated. Getting in your Jetta and going to the mall is really simple. That's what we're looking for here, okay, so setting up investing can be really simple, but you need to know a few terms first, okay. So, like, I think, understanding like the lay of the land is really important. So, first of all, what we need to know is, like retirement versus investing. Okay, that's like a big thing because there's different accounts that you would invest within, depending on what your goals are.

Speaker 2: 16:53

So, if you work at a job and you have a 401k or a simple IRA, something like that, that is a retirement vehicle and essentially what happens with a 401k, just as an example, is, your company will put money from your paycheck into a retirement fund for you before you pay taxes on it, which means that when you want that money, when you're 65, after you retire, you pay taxes on it then. So there's another retirement vehicle that you can use called a Roth IRA and a Roth IRA, and these all have different you know. You need to look up all the different limits, like to make sure you're within the income limits and there's only so much you can invest per year. But as it relates to a Roth IRA, you can invest money post tax. So after you get your paycheck, you get some money right, you've already paid taxes on it. Then you put that into a Roth IRA, you can invest in that and then that grows tax free so you never pay taxes on it again.

Speaker 2: 17:46

So when you retire, you have this big pot of money which is totally like ready for you to withdraw from and you don't have to pay taxes on it again. So we love that. And then on top of that, that's retirement side. And then there's just like a brokerage account which is just buying some stocks, buying some funds, and managing a brokerage account is just kind of like your fund money, your general thing. It's not for investing for retirement, it's just for investing. So that's the first thing.

Speaker 1: 18:10

So okay, let's talk about this like fund money investing I feel like that is Ross would all be doing but this fund money things where do we start? I know that there's companies like Schwab, and then Robinhood was really big there for a second Like what is this an app? Do we need to call someone? How do you actually do that?

Speaker 2: 18:32

Such a good question and, yes, I use trial Schwab for all of my investing, but honestly, it's kind of like the formula one, car you can do a lot on it. I like things to be really, really simple. So what you're looking for is what's called a discount brokerage fidelity Vanguard. Vanguard is another one that I use. They're super simple. Their website interface looks like it's from 1998 and you're like, good, this is secure, like okay, I love it. And the reason why we like that is because simple is better and all we're trying to do here is be able to very easily manage our funds and manage what we want to buy. So, using Vanguard as an example, all of these different companies have and this is the next thing to know ETFs, exchange traded funds. Okay, that's what we're looking for.

Speaker 2: 19:17

Warren Buffett is a master of playing the long game. Etfs are tracking the long game and I'm going to get more into that in one second. But the reality is, is this Robinhood? Like thinking you're going to buy GameStop, become a millionaire? Trade Bitcoin? All of these things are very volatile and that's just tracking one company at a time. It's crazy. It's gambling. It's honestly gambling.

Speaker 2: 19:40

I would never advise anybody to do that, and that's for people that are watching CNBC tracking Reddit trying to play the game. But you can become very wealthy without ever like buying an option or a call. I don't even know what that is. Okay, we don't need to know that at this point. That's for level 103 class. But, as it relates to just investing, simply looking at things like ETFs, exchange traded funds, is going to be the key, and the reason it's the key is because an exchange traded fund will track a big selection of stocks for you with a computer. It's an algorithm, it's like your tic-tac algorithm, so you're not paying somebody to make decisions for you because, I'm sorry, the finance bro you into college with is not going to make better decisions for you than a computer. Okay, it's just tracking things on an index and what's going to happen is that it's going to just track, over time, a specific group of stocks like the S and P 500. Have you heard of the S and P 500?

Speaker 1: 20:35

Yes, but explain it to us, because yeah, 100%.

Speaker 2: 20:39

Who knows Exactly. It's one of those things it's just like, oh, everybody talks about, like the Nasdaq or S and P 500. Like what does that mean? The?

Speaker 1: 20:45

Joe down industrialism. Yes, exactly yes.

Speaker 2: 20:49

Exactly, S and P 500 is just a collection of the 500 largest US companies. S and P is a company called standards and boards. It's just their collection of the 500 biggest companies. So you're talking about Amazon, Facebook, Google, Uber, whatever Apple yes, exactly the big companies. Now you have to ask yourself do I have faith in the fact that those companies will survive for the next 10, 20, 30 years? And the other nice thing about the S and P 500 is, as companies don't do very well and they fall off, they remove them from the top 500 lists and they replace them. So Facebook didn't exist on the S and P 500 30 years ago, but it's a monolith now. So they put it in there and they took out somebody like, I don't know, Kodak or something that's not relevant anymore. So they automatically adjust this for you and over the course of time.

Speaker 2: 21:37

Since its inception in the late fifties, the S and P 500 has produced a return on average of 10.26% per year. So if you trust in the fact that America will continue to do well in business and you trust that things will continue to go on as they have, you can probably look at historical data and expect and this is not investing advice. I'm just saying if you were looking to where to invest. Okay, the S and P 500 has done pretty good. I think it's going to do pretty well in the future.

Speaker 2: 22:05

All you need to focus on is buying an ETF that tracks S and P 500. How do you find that? Good friend, Google S and P 500 ETF and it will give you like 15 different options within Vanguard, For example. Vanguard has a bunch of these ETFs that all start with a V V for Vanguard, so it'll be like VTI, VOO, VT, all these different ones, and they just have like different collections of stocks in them, and if you just are looking for a really easy way to start, that's going to be the place in ETF. You don't have to be managing all of these different companies. You don't have to be reading their reports. You're not watching them earnings, because for me, an old money lifestyle is one where I don't have to be managing my money every five minutes. I have my system set up and they work in the background of my life to continue to grow my wealth. I maintain them, I'm responsible for them, but I'm not like super stressed about it.

Speaker 1: 23:03

Right and well, okay, this is kind of what I have heard and I you know, we'll see how accurate it is. But when we talk about, like, going into this play investing account, I think it makes sense to invest in what you know and what you understand. So, for instance, I watch a lot of TV. I know which streaming platform is doing the best right now. So, like you know, I could be looking at Disney. Well, just because Disney is a huge company, I'll be like, oh, I want to buy stocks in Disney because I understand how well or not well Disney is doing and it's something I'm naturally already tapped into. So I think that's what I'm going to do. When you go on these play accounts and I know you're saying we don't have to look at all these like crazy things, we're just looking at our ETFs. But is there anything else that we need to know how to read before you know? Clicking purchase.

Speaker 2: 23:54

Yeah, absolutely. You're going to want to look at the charts and the trending over time and then also obviously all of the news about the company.

Speaker 2: 24:04

But think of it this way. So I love TV too. I'm a reality TV junkie. Okay, I'm a PhD in Real Housewives, like I know it all. I love my Real Housewives of Miami, I love Real Housewives of New York, but like I'm not going to buy stock in Summerhouse, I don't really understand Southern hospitality, like I don't get those. So when you're looking at individual shows, those are like individual stocks.

Speaker 2: 24:27

But buying an ETF is like buying stock in Bravo, where you get everything on the network and you can kind of understand that it's all going to average out and you know Andy Cohen is going to make good decisions and he's going to retire the shows that don't do well.

Speaker 2: 24:39

You know what I mean. So when you look at something globally like that, it really does give you a little bit more of assurances that things are going to trend upwards because they're being managed in the right way, whereas there can be, you know, a black swan event like Disney is a great example. I actually have like a majority of my personal holdings in Disney, just randomly, because when I was a kid I was like little mermaid, let's get that Right. And when we're talking about Disney, they're going through hellish times right now because of all of this, you know, recharacterization of the characters and the stories, and people's backlash and Bob Iger's in there and like I can't keep up, I just can't. I've got my own business to run. So for me, kind of looking at things globally and finding packages of stocks that I can buy at one time is easier for me to keep my cortisol low.

Speaker 1: 25:27

Absolutely. I love how we're calling like it's the Bravo network versus the individual shows, and I think that's a really easy way we can grasp on to it. When having these stocks or these ETFs is there a penalty if we, you know, sell them quickly, we buy them and then we turn them back in a year, like I mean? I do think it should be a little bit like buy, forget about it for a little bit and come back and see how it's doing. But yeah, I just want to get your feelings on investing long-term.

Speaker 2: 26:00

So my feelings on investing long-term is it's all I do. I am not buying stocks to sell them quickly. Personally, when you buy a stock, or when you sell a stock, rather, you're going to have to pay taxes on anything that was gained through the growth of that stock, and you also have to pay a small like management or transaction fee. Now, that's one of the reasons why, like companies like Fidelity and Vanguard, those fees are minimal. If you start working with a broker, you are now in a straddle. They're stealing all your money literally just for, like, pushing a couple of buttons for you and that's the end of that. That's why I like a low-cost discount broker. When we're talking about buying and selling, now we're talking about day trading. And here's something else. This is another really important, just kind of factoid about stock market investing. You're never going to time the market ever. You're never going to be able to buy at the highest and or no, buy at the lowest and sell at the highest. That's just not going to happen because things are so volatile. So what we like to look at is dollar cost averaging. So, essentially, if you are setting yourself up to invest, this should be a long game, in my opinion for yourself. I'm talking about future me. I'm talking about coastal grandmother me. I'm talking about, you know, my beach house, me, in 30 years.

Speaker 2: 27:15

Dollar cost averaging essentially means that if you buy high or if you buy low, it's going to average out to somewhere in the middle.

Speaker 2: 27:22

So just do the math Like if I buy a stock at $100 one day and then next week it's $200, the dollar cost average of that is 150, which is what the middle of that road was right. So if you're buying stocks on a regular schedule, it will eventually average out. So I'm a big fan of automating. So for me, as along with my savings, that just comes out of my checking, every month I automatically withdraw money that goes into my brokerage account, my fund money. And when I say fund money, that doesn't mean it's not real, it doesn't mean that you can't have losses, it doesn't mean that you're playing with it. I'm experimenting with my money, I'm investing in it and I'm putting it in there, and every single month it just automatically buys the same amount of stocks of all the ones that I have, or the same amount of ETFs, so that over time it will dollar cost average out and I won't be buying low. I won't be buying high, I'll just be buying in the middle.

Speaker 1: 28:13

When would you give yourself the green light to start in one of these discount brokerages? When it's like you have that emergency fund and then what else? What else is your check marks before you start doing this?

Speaker 2: 28:29

Honestly, have an emergency fund and be ready to start your financial life Like, let's get real, I wasn't ready. When I was in my early twenties I was at a bar, drunk somewhere. I wasn't like paying attention to it. And when you're ready to be an adult, the sooner you can get ready, the better off you're going to be, because if you're investing when you're in your twenties, you're going to be a multimillionaire over somebody who started investing in their late thirties. That's just factual because of compounding interest. So the earlier you get started in doing this, the better off you're going to be at the end of the game. So if you're like me and you want to just throw all your money at bad beer and lots of calories, then you can start later and that's why I'm investing so much money now. Right, like? I'm very transparent about this.

Speaker 2: 29:10

I'm not trying to say I had it all figured out. I've always known what to do. But if you are ready to take control of your financial life, I can tell you there's no feeling that's crazier than watching your bank account numbers just go up and up and you're not doing anything, like I'm not working for that money, and the money that I'm earning in my stocks is sometimes more than I'm earning in my paycheck, like it just grows and my net worth grows. And now one of the things we need to keep in mind, too, is it doesn't always go up. Okay. The economy, the world, covid, things happen and they go up and down. But what I know from doing my own research and that's what I'm here to impart onto you all is that over time, the stock market has always gone up, and I believe in American ingenuity.

Speaker 2: 29:54

I believe in America as a business entity. We have, you know, apples here, googles here. We're doing some good stuff here, okay, and so I feel bullish, as they say it, in the stock market. I feel good about the stock market continuing to grow. Therefore, I will continue to invest. If you're ready to start very small and ETF Vanguard, it's a really good way to get started. Come listen to the old money podcast. I'll answer any questions that come into you. You just need to be tapped into it. You can put money in every single month and really kind of forget about it, but I want to make sure you're doing it the right way.

Speaker 1: 30:27

Well, and I love that we're talking so much about long game, because I think especially, I would say, the 20 set has been super targeted, maybe by the idea of, like, get rich quick with crypto or the game something, and the reality is those things are very risky and this is like you said. We could be driving a four, which I loved, by the way, driving a Formula One car because very complicated, and living in that. We're sitting watching the news figuring out training, very overwhelming things no, nobody has the time for. If you have a normal job and normal life, yeah, or you can be here long haul and invest as you go, so congrats, I feel like we've made it. You're like rich Go, amazing. How do we stay wealthy? What does being wealthy really look like?

Speaker 2: 31:22

I love that. So first of all, just to go back to your point about the long game, like we all know, warren Buffett he's like one of the most prolific investors of all time and he made the majority of his fortune he's a billionaire after the age of 65. I mean, this is the long game people Like. That's when he really got very wealthy. I mean, he's always been old to us because as long as we've been conscious human beings, he's old. Right, but what's so great about that is it reminds us that this is not get rich quick. That's not the journey.

Speaker 2: 31:53

When we talk about staying wealthy, the one thing I can tell you for sure is that you can see people that are dressed well and look good and drive the nice cars, and they may or may not be wealthy, but the people that are wealthy may or may not be driving nice cars and wearing nice things. Wealthy people are defined simply by the fact that they have money in the bank. The money is not hanging in the closet. It is in the bank and it is being used for income producing assets like buying real estate, buying businesses. It's using money to create more money. That's the real difference and I really believe, marley, that we are all set up on our own journeys to learn how to hold the capacity for wealth. Like I think this is why a lot of lottery winners get rich and then lose all the money because they've never learned how to manage money or not even manage it. But like the energetics of feeling wealthy. Like what does it feel like to sign a check over for a million dollars to buy the down payment on the house? Like you have to be really comfortable with money in order to do that and not feel scarcity around it. So I feel like, as we all go on our individual journeys, like nobody should feel bad about where they're at. You're just exercising your muscle to learn how to hold the capacity for more and more money and as you grow you will build that muscle stronger and stronger so that you can do even better of managing your money when you're a millionaire.

Speaker 2: 33:15

But in order to stay rich, it honestly goes back to like the things I was talking about doing when I was broke, like stopping yourself from spending at Sephora or like at the shipyard when you're feeling sad. When you're a billionaire, like this same habits apply, or being able to communicate what your boundaries are around spending money. I mean, think about it when you have friends that are billionaires and I know a lot of people that are very wealthy, and a lot of them are all keeping up with each other, keeping up with the Joneses, like, oh, she just got a new Bulgari Serpenti watch, I have to get the next one. Oh, she just got this new piece of jewelry from Sephard, I have to go get it. And all of this money is getting spent to like, keep up with the Joneses, there's always going to be a bigger yacht at the dock, okay. So you have to get comfortable with where you are and owning it.

Speaker 2: 34:05

And for me, it's a lot of journaling, like what does my rich life look like? What makes me feel wealthy? How can I embody that today? Gratitude for what I have, how can I use my money to create more money? Starting businesses, investing in my business and investing in the stock market. Why do I want to carry a burkin? What does that mean for me? And getting really conscious about it. Because when you inspect these things, we kind of start unpacking, like how culture is rubbed off on us or our parents, or what we think we have to do. What it really comes down to is like feeling good within ourselves and finding the wealth within. I know that's so corny, but like that's how you stay wealthy.

Speaker 1: 34:43

No, I think that's so real because I don't think that wealth as much as.

Speaker 1: 34:49

Don't get me wrong, I love a designer bag as much as the next girl and I'm all about it, but it doesn't always look like what we've perceived or deemed as wealthy, and I don't know if it's between the social media aspect or whatnot.

Speaker 1: 35:06

We have so much more access to assuming what people's wealth is than we used to, and really it could be the person driving a Honda Civic from 2007 who wears the same two outfits. It could be the richest person in the room, and we don't know. So I do totally agree that it has to do so much more with mental state, and the boundaries are important I don't think people talk about no matter how rich you are, you should have boundaries, and it really starts at the beginning, like even if you're working yourself out of debt. Something, though, I wanted to ask you, because I think maybe I'd hope that, if people are faced with the choice of buying Louis Vuitton purse or starting generational wealth, that they choose generational wealth, but how does one help create for their futures and people of their future when we live in this world?

Speaker 2: 36:02

100%. You're so right. It's like, especially social media, all we are bombarded with are these just like showings of like shopping at Chanel, buying this? I just saw an article that said Hermez's sales were up 18% last year. I'm like what is going on? Like, where are people? Like they have not money you have to spend just to get a Birkin. I can't.

Speaker 1: 36:22

No, and I think that's so real because I'm not kidding you, given you know whatever. My grandmother and aunt have lived very well in the luxury space for a long time and they would like Hermez, and I was always like that's a grandma brand. Now I have been so inundated with it I'm like I need to want to be working towards a Birkin. It's so real we're the more we're inundated by it in media. Yes, so I agree.

Speaker 2: 36:48

Yeah, and I think that's it's a really good thing to be aware of. I think a lot of people aren't aware. I don't think a lot of people are aware of that. So when you ask, like OK, it's between generational wealth and Louis Vuitton, I would say it's not an either, or I think it can be a both, and I think you can be planning for your future and also enjoying your life within reason. Right? I will tell you, though I have bought a bag while in debt, and I have bought a bag while not in debt, and the bag while not in debt feels so much better. Ok, because every time you look at that bag when you're in debt, you're like I should not have bought that, and you just feel dirty about it, like I've been there OK. So when you get to the point, though and I'm really I feel very blessed about this too it's like I don't want for much. You know, like I do drive a 12 year old Jeep grand Cherokee right now. She still runs, she still looks good. I think the fuel pump is about to fall out, so we're supposed to get a new car in the next month or two, but, like you know what I'm saying, I'm not trying to keep up with these ideas of what people are telling me that I should have, because what that creates is golden handcuffs. So when you have golden handcuffs in like on, what that means is you're basically beholden to the job you don't want to be at, the relationship you don't want to be in because you have these bills to pay. And so when you can unshackle yourself from the golden handcuffs and make each decision for yourself, knowing what you can afford, I think that's important and the other thing to keep in mind too.

Speaker 2: 38:14

There's a lot of conversation about generational wealth and that's very much like next level of like setting up trust and life insurance policies and all these types of things that we're going to get into on old money. But the reality is is that I was passed down a lot of money stories and a lot of money trauma. So generational wealth could be as simple as cleaning up your own money habits and teaching your kids how to feel more successful with money. It could be breaking the generational trauma around the money that you have. It could be just giving your kids more attention or time because you've decided to set up your life to work part-time or stay at home or whatever that might be that makes you feel rich. It's just in an individual basis, but there's so many more things than just a trust fund we can pass down to our kids and that's part of the whole process and, quite frankly, like I don't have kids yet, I have God daughters. They're going to get all my purses, okay. So there's generational wealth right there. I love that.

Speaker 1: 39:12

Amber, you are literally the perfect wealth of knowledge to break this down for us. I love how you've made this so easy and palatable for us. I need everybody to know where they can find you.

Speaker 2: 39:26

You are so sweet, marley, thank you. I'm on old money podcast on Instagram and TikTok. You can always send me a DM. By the way, I answer all the DMs. If you have questions about money you want me to discuss on the show, send them through. I answer them all. You can find me personally, amber in California, on Instagram and for our marketing agency, af Marketing, it's afmktgcom or on Instagram.

Speaker 1: 39:48

Thank you so much again for taking the time to be here.

Speaker 2: 39:51

It's my absolute pleasure I love chatting with you.

Speaker 1: 39:54

Thank you so much for listening to Confessions of a Want to Be a Girl. Don't forget to rate and subscribe to the show. As always, we'll see you next Tuesday.