The F Around and Find Out Generation: Gen X Wisdom on Prioritizing Yourself

Highlighting the Gen X perspective, Blythe Alpern joins me this week with a wealth of experiences and insights. As the host of the Gen X Experience Podcast, her passion lies in creating a space for her generation to connect, commiserate, and reminisce about their midlife challenges.

During the conversation, Blythe shares her journey towards prioritizing self-care in recent years. Faced with the grief of losing both parents and feeling burnt out, she realized the need to nurture her physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. She discusses the valuable lessons she learned about work-life balance and setting boundaries with clients.

Despite the challenges, Blythe has found ways to enhance her well-being and care for herself. Starting the podcast and incorporating small changes like daily walks have made a significant impact. Her wisdom as a Gen Xer, gained from her experiences and her candidness about her self-care journey, will surely enlighten the audience.

About Blythe:

Blythe is a copywriter and the founder of Wordwoman Creative, where she creates strategic, creative websites, blog posts, email/newsletters, and 360° campaigns for beauty and lifestyle brands. When she isn't writing copy, she is working on her podcast, The GenX Experience, a place for GenXers to chat about navigating midlife, mixed with a bit of that 80s nostalgia. 

Before she founded her copywriting business, she worked in the agency world for various brands, including Coca-Cola, Ford, Lancome, Don Julio, and more. She also spent five years as a beauty and lifestyle blogger, where she cultivated her passion for indie beauty.

When she's not working on her business or podcast, Blythe enjoys long walks, the occasional hike, spending time with her rescue pup Buster, reading, binging documentaries on cults, and checking out the newest restaurant, rooftop bar, or coffee shop in Atlanta. 

Connect with Blythe:

Website: https://www.wordwomancreative.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/blythealpern/

Podcast (Available on Spotify and Apple): https://open.spotify.com/show/4WlZPvc78LWah0V3QbJ4vq

Podcast Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thegenxexperiencepod/

Transcript

Unknown: 0:00

Kristen

Kristen Daukas: 0:05

daukas, welcome to Conversations on the rocks, the podcast where the drink is strong and the stories are stronger. I'm your host, Kristen daukas, and this isn't your average chat fest. Here. Real people spill the tea alongside their favorite drinks, from the hilarious to the heart wrenching, each episode a wild card. You'll laugh, you may cry, but you'll definitely learn something new. So grab whatever, what's your whistle and buckle up. It's time to dive into the raw, the real and the ridiculously human. Let's get this chat party started. Hey everybody, it's Kristen daukas, and you are listening to conversations on the rocks, the podcast that is as random as the thoughts that rumble through my head like Tumbleweed in Texas. I'm super excited. I have Blythe Alpern with me today, and she's a copywriter, but most importantly, she is the host of the Gen X Experience podcast, which I was on a few weeks ago, and we're gonna talk about Gen X stuff. Y'all, so if you're not Gen X, you can dip out now, or you can listen and learn to find out why we are the F around and find out generation Blythe. Please introduce yourself,

Unknown: 1:21

hello. Yes, I am Blythe Alpern. I Yes, I'm a copywriter and a proud Gen Xer. I'm actually turning the Big Five, oh, next month, and I'm actually excited for it, unlike when I was turning 30. So, right, yeah, I

Kristen Daukas: 1:38

30 was a mind. It was a mind you know what? I was

Unknown: 1:42

like having a mental breakdown. Basically, my mother was like, Get over yourself.

Kristen Daukas: 1:48

Girl, I wish I was turning 30.

Unknown: 1:52

Yes, yeah. Sometimes I'm like, can I go back there and just smack myself and be like, be happy to be 30. And also, here's a few guys that you should not date, and a few jobs you should not take.

Kristen Daukas: 2:07

Dear past Blythe future blight has some good advice for you. She does talk a little bit about your podcast.

Unknown: 2:16

So I've been a podcast fan before, like, for deck, like, at least a decade, I got into them very early, and I never thought about having one until a few years ago. Maybe, I guess, during the pandemic, we all had lots of ideas. And I was like, You know what, there's not really a place for Gen X. Like, there are some Gen X podcasts, but they're mostly about pop culture. Or, you know, looking back at movies and like, I want a place for us to come on and, you know, commiserate, bitch, complain, be snarky, and talk about the things that are affecting being in midlife, and then mix that with a little bit of nostalgia, because it is fun to look back at the 80s and the 90s and 70s and just reminisce about The good old days before social media, right?

Kristen Daukas: 3:02

All of us, I think, are pretty can definitely say, and I've told my girls this, because everyone knows I've got three young adult children. I am so glad we did not have all of this when we were growing up as especially being latchkey kids. Can you imagine with the crap that we got into and the oh my god, can you imagine? Had some I mean, the worst thing we had was somebody passing a note in the eighth grade and then getting popped by the teacher and having to read it out loud. That was the worst thing. I just can't imagine. And one of the things that I have done in the past, I don't do it so much anymore, is coaching parents on social media, because it is just a completely different growing up situation when you're dealing with having the technology and the social media involved in it. So that what you just said is a great segue to what you and I said that we were going to talk about, and that is Gen X. And I took, I'm going to make a mash up of Gen X and the importance of self care. And what I think is fascinating is, and we touched on this a little bit when you and I had our conversation on your show, is that it's such a foreign it was a completely foreign concept to our mothers, who most mostly are baby boomers. So we didn't grow up with a good and I'm not saying our moms weren't good role models, but we didn't grow up with a good example of putting our priorities first. So let's talk a little bit about priorities, self care, boundaries, all of which I might add, we had to teach ourselves.

Unknown: 4:38

Yes, yeah, because it's funny, my mom worked. She basically ran the show of my dad's office and our family and everything else. And she would always tell my sister my brother and you know, you can be whatever you want and be independent, but then you know she never, she didn't put herself first ever. It was the family. It was my dad's business. And I remember looking at that and going, I love my mom. She's amazing, but I don't want to become that, where I put myself last, right? That's easier said than done. It really took, yeah, it really took from 2015 to 2020, I my parents both were sick, and they both subsequently passed away. And I looked at myself in the mirror after losing my dad, and I was like, what I don't I don't like what I see. I don't like the way I'm looking. I was exhausted, emotionally, physically. I'm like, I need to take care of myself, because I'm in my 40s, and if I don't do something now, what am I going to be like in my 50s and 60s and 70s? And it was a physical thing, and also, like a mental, emotional, spiritual, everything, I just kind of was like, I need to do something so I can feel better. And because I was still grieving, you know, which a grief never goes away, that, yeah, so I needed an outlet for also was the pandemic, like we all were going completely insane, so I just started making choices to to better take care of myself in small ways and in in bigger ways.

Kristen Daukas: 6:15

And people, some people, you know, we were kind of raised in a sense of self care is selfish, is you know, so you have to put everybody first. If you are a woman, your spouse, your children, you know, the the grocery store, person, the mailman, your job, everything came first. And if you try to stand up and say, You know what? I don't know about you. My mom never took a trip by herself or with her friends ever. And you just, you know, if you don't do that, if you don't do these things, you're gonna and it's so true, you can't pour from an empty cup. You have to pour from the saucer, and it takes a lot. And you're right. I think a lot of that my dad passed away when, thank God in in 2019 not thank God that he died, but thank God he passed away before covid hit, because we would have never survived that. But it was kind of that was a big wake up call, turning 54 turning 40 was turning 40 was a I have no more filter. I'm going to stop pretending, to put a filter in place. And then turning 50 was kind of like a badass, you know, I am woman, hear me roar, kind of thing. But it also kind of coincides with that whole, wow, we're not even midlife anymore. We're past midlife. And, you know, it was very shocking revelation to me that I went, oh shit, it's autumn. It's not summer anymore. It's autumn. Winter is coming. I've

Unknown: 7:48

lived half, yeah, I lived half my life. What's the next part of it gonna look like? And yeah, and

Kristen Daukas: 7:54

you can find yourself getting bogged down by that, and can become very depressing, you know? You can go, Gosh, at best, you know, I might have 20. I'm 55 I turned 55 last year, and I'm like, I hope I've got another 20 in me. I'd like to have another 25 in me, but you don't know. And so if you're continue to, you know, go around and do all the things for everybody else, but you what kind of existence is that it's at

Unknown: 8:16

the end of the day, you know? I it's like, I think when people always say, you know, work isn't everything. Of course, it's not. And I wish our culture was better, that because people on their deathbeds, their regrets are never, oh, you know, I really wish I would have worked more. No, it's I wish I would have gone here. I wish I would have spent time with more time my family. I wish I would have done this and that. And, you know, losing my parents. They were in their 70s, and, you know they were, they had just retired, and they didn't get to do, not that they didn't do things, but they were like, we want to do this, and then you get to do any of it. That's

Kristen Daukas: 8:47

so true, because when my stepdad died, he died, he passed when he was 60, and he was at type A we talked about it. He was at the office at seven, came home at five, walked in the yard until it got dark. My mom had to have a meet and three on the table by 6pm and when my oldest daughter was born, it was like, when I when this happens, then this happens. And that generation was so true to this. Like, when I say$50,000 then I'm gonna do this when I retire, then I'm gonna do this. And so many of them, it's just I didn't the same as you I don't want to be that way, like we're not promised tomorrow.

Unknown: 9:25

No, we're not. And you know women, you know well especially, think like, you know women. Of course, we were always taught you can do anything, but you got to put yourself last. And then our parents also had that philosophy of like, you know, first in, last out. At work, I remember my dad telling me that, and when I was talking about because in advertising, you kind of move around. That's how you would right be promoted, right? And my parents just found that completely crazy. Granted, my parents never worked in the corporate field. My dad was an orthodontist. My mother was a dental hygienist, so they didn't understand the corporate world. But. But they would just say things or, like, suck it up, or life's that's how life is. That's how things are. And I remember being in my 20s and my 30s, and like, feeling like I was drowning and no lifeline, and there was not, like, my parents didn't get it, you know, friends kind of got it, but we were all in the same spot. So it took a long time to get to the point where I was like, This is not how I want to live the rest of my life. And I'm not perfect, perfect at it. I'm always a work in progress. But who

Kristen Daukas: 10:32

is? Try every day. You know who is, and you're self employed as well, aren't you? Yes, yes. So we both are. And you know, can you great example, my middle flew in from Pittsburgh last Monday, and so I was able to spend time with her Monday and Tuesday, then we took off to Ohio on Wednesday, and, you know, for the holiday. But you know, our parents would have never had the ability that you and I do to say, You know what, I'm going to get out of town. And the cool thing is, as long as I've got an internet connection and my laptop I can work from wherever. Is it ideal? No, I still kind of like my routine and being in my groove and in my little home office. But our parents would have never been able to do that. They got two weeks of vacation a year. And however, 12 federal holidays, however many federal holidays there were, and that was it. Yeah.

Unknown: 11:20

And since my, you know, parents owned the business, like, if my dad wasn't working, that doesn't mean that, you know, more patients were coming in. And, you know, we used to want to go, like, like, Dad, why can't we go skiing? And he's like, Well, if I break a leg, then there's no money. You know, of course, he was doom and gloom, or he wouldn't like skimming, because if I, yeah, if I break something, and I'm like, we'll just wheel you up to the chairs. You can still treat patients, but, you know, it was like a different pressure. But yeah, now we can connect from anywhere. It does make it sometimes harder to go. No, no, I'm gonna disconnect. I'm gonna take the vacation, because

Kristen Daukas: 11:55

I'm doing that in September for two weeks. We're going to Greece. And it's like, I've already told I'm like, I'm not taking my computer. I am going to start filling those, you know, two weeks of work now so that it's because we do we need to completely, you know, we're that generation that is both analog and digital. So, you know, it's very easy for us to remember what it was like to shut the laptop or turn it off, or whatever, or not even have it. You know. Do you remember the days how nice it was when you left work for vacation and you're like, bye, Susie, I'll see you in a week and a half, and that was it. Yep, there was no checking your phone. There was no calling in, there was no voicemail, there was nothing. Was my

Unknown: 12:38

five Exactly. And I remember we all started getting cell phones, and my job would want. Job would want my cell phone, and I'm like, No, you can have my home phone number, but I'm not giving you my cell phone because I don't want to be that connected. And I even try. I learned this as being a freelancer is I turn the email notifications off of my phone because I was getting clients. Sometimes they were in a different times than like a client in Australia, but I would get clients emailing me at night, and I would see it, and then I'd be like, my mind when and I'm like, no, no, I don't want to see it. And I that's been that way for years. I will go in and check it, and sometimes I'll schedule an email. Otherwise, I'm like, You know what? That can wait till tomorrow, because I need to have my time and I need to turn off work mode.

Kristen Daukas: 13:18

And I have, since this new I've been back in business for myself for the past four years. And there, when I first had my agency back in 2008 before I went and then there was a company in between. I did that, it was always constant, like, Oh, I've got to respond right now I'm in social media and digital marketing. Can I tell you, in the 15 years that I've been doing this, how many emergencies I have had? One? Yeah, and it's just it doesn't. And I was like, No. And I had a client text me last week on the fourth I was like, Really, boundaries, boundaries. And, you know, I like that. We have gotten better. And again, I think it's an age thing. Um, yes, as far as setting those boundaries and saying, No, it can wait. It can wait. And you have

Unknown: 14:10

and the thing is, you know, you I think it's good to start in one place, like maybe set them in work, but you also have to set them in your personal life with people that you're friends with, or you're dating or what. But you also have to set them for yourself. Of like, this is what I will do. This is what I will not do. These are the times that I will, you know, be good to myself. I will, like, do the self care. This is the time, you know, like, I will take a rest, and that's okay, because, you know, like, I love that. I sometimes will take naps. And it's funny, because when we were kids, were like, oh, nap time. Come on our bedtime. And now I'm like, Oh, please, please. Right now, time in my day,

Kristen Daukas: 14:43

I wish I could nap. I can't nap. It takes me too long to get this to slow down, to to be able to so I've always found if and my family and or the girls know, like, if I'm taking a nap, I'm sick, I'm sick. Um, but yeah, you're right, and you. Watching TV. If I want to binge watch an entire series, I'm gonna do it. I don't consider it lazy. I'll call it conserving energy. I am conserving my energy.

Unknown: 15:12

Yes, we don't have to do, you know, appointment TV, like, I mean, I do miss that where it was. You know, you knew, as a collective, like nation or whatever, we were all watching this show or this episode, because if you didn't see it, you missed it, maybe you could see it in the reruns. So I missed that a little bit, but we do, you know there are shows you've been watched, binge watched, that everyone's talking about, and you can text your friends and be like, did you see this episode? Did you see that episode? And yeah, it is. It is kind of a form of relaxation and self care. And you know, I love to watch cult documentaries. My sister and I are both into the I am fascinated, fascinated by cults. And, yeah, I don't care. It's my guilty pleasure.

Kristen Daukas: 15:51

We gotta have your guilty pleasure. Yeah, that's all right. Summer for me is Big Brother. It's the most cheesy, campiest thing, but that's like our summer guilty pleasure, and it starts next Wednesday, and I can't wait. And it's so funny I've gotten we now have a pool. You know how you have a football betting pool? We do it for Big Brother. And now it used to just be me, Steve and Cassie, the youngest, and now she's pulled, like three of her friends in

Unknown: 16:20

that's great. Did you because big brother started right in England, I think, I think so across the pond. I wonder the difference between how things are here versus so

Kristen Daukas: 16:32

it's interesting. You say that because there's another show, um, traitor, the traitor, and it started in Australia, and so now they have like Australia, England, America, and there's one other version, and it's very interesting, because we've watched them all now. It's interesting to see the difference between how the Americans do it and and not just like the show itself, but the people that are contestants. It's really kind of fascinating, because it is. It's definitely very different. And we also have the Olympics starting up. So let's talk about some fun stuff with Jenna, speaking of TV, what was your okay? First of all, did you watch soaps after school?

Unknown: 17:17

I did when, when I was in college, most more and a little bit when I was younger. My, like I said, my both my parents worked, and we did have someone watching us. My brother was four years younger, and the woman that would like kind of we called her aunt Frida. She was the loveliest woman. She watched soap. So we will sometimes watch those. My mother didn't really like it, but,

Kristen Daukas: 17:38

you know, Aunt Frida wanted to see them. So guess what kids were watching? Did we're watching soaps? Yeah, I was a big Guiding Light person. That was my thing. I was guiding light when everybody was General Hospital with the Luke and Alan Michael.

Unknown: 17:51

I loved,

Kristen Daukas: 17:54

yeah, that was, and then, of course, you know, you had your going back to what you were talking about with when we were, you know, the TV Guide days, you know, Friday night. It was, what it was, what was the show on before Dallas?

Unknown: 18:08

Was it Falcon Crest or No?

Kristen Daukas: 18:10

Was it Dallas and then fantasy? No, no, no. I'm thinking Saturday, Saturday night, Love Boat, then Fantasy Island, Fantasy

Unknown: 18:17

Island, yes. And when we're little, I remember it was The Muppet Show that yes, was on, I think on Saturday night, yeah,

Kristen Daukas: 18:22

but and then on, you know, during the mornings, were your parents early risers in the weekends.

Unknown: 18:29

My mother was my dad, not so much. He liked to kind of sleep in, but my mom, she would get up early ever I'm like, Don't you know how to sleep in? I just, I craves. I am a very bad sleeper, but I love to sleep in. But yeah, they were up my and my sister and brother would get up early to watch cartoons. And I was like, cartoons are for babies. My sister's 16 months younger than me, and my brother, like I said, is four years but I was just like, they're babies. And I just wanted to, you know, have my, I think I just wanted to have my own time alone. And yeah, and

Kristen Daukas: 18:59

with three of you in the house, I can totally understand that. Yeah, because Saturdays, I was an only child. I grew up an only child. So that was, you know, get up and before my mom married my stepdad when? But she did that when I was, like, seven years old. So there weren't, you know, she slept in. And I definitely was the, go get yourself some cereal, sit in front of the and, you know, those days, it's, it's, it's innocent, you know, I think that's the thing that, that we're missing is, you know, you didn't hear 24/7 of all the horrible things going on in our world. You know, it's just so true.

Unknown: 19:36

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Kristen Daukas: 20:06

So what are some of the ways that you you intentionally practice self care? For you,

Unknown: 20:11

one of my favorite things to do, even though now it's like so so hot, I love going outside and going for a walk. I live by this trail in Atlanta called the Beltline. It used to be a railroad track, and they turned into a walking path. And I, which I started doing during the pandemic, just to get outside, I would go take my dog and go for a walk. And I still love doing that one it's it's fun for people watching. There's some very interesting characters on the BeltLine, and some very annoying people as well, who take the whole sidewalk. But I love being outside. I love going hiking. I don't do that as much as I can. I have a thing for rooftop bars, and I find that a self care, because I love sitting outside with a amazing cocktail and just looking out at the view, spending time with my dog, my nieces and nephew. I love that I get to watch them grow up and hopefully still stay the cool aunt my my nephew. Sometimes it's like, oh, so cringe, but I do it on purpose. It's, of course, that's our job. Of course it is we you know, it's, he's in junior high, and I remember junior high, and I'm like, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna try to speak the lingo. I don't understand a lot of their their slang, but I will pick up on words, and then I'll say it. He's like, Oh, so cringe. I'm like, mission accomplished.

Kristen Daukas: 21:27

Funny thing is, they don't realize that we're doing it intentionally. No,

Unknown: 21:32

they will later. I'm sure later he'll be like, you know, yeah, yeah, writing in my journal. I love music. My dog hates my singing, I don't I was the other night. I was, I'll do like, the Doom scroll, but I'll listen to, like, they'll have 80s music, come on, and I'll start singing along. And he was like, pieing me. Like, please, no way. Yeah. He was like, cuddling. And he's like, every time he just put his like, Mom, you're killing me. I'm like, I don't think my voice is that bad.

Kristen Daukas: 22:00

And then, like, listen, I brought you home. I rescued you. Have this wonderful life because of me. Maybe he was trying

Unknown: 22:08

to stay with you, maybe, maybe, but, yeah, I mean, do it? I, which would be fine. I, yeah, instead of just being giving me the look like, you know, maybe just my voice is hurts his ears because of the level, whatever it is. But what else is sleep? Sleep is definitely self care for me, because I'm so bad at it that when I get a good night's sleep, or even just being lazy, like a lazy Sunday,

Kristen Daukas: 22:34

it's not lazy, it's energy preservation, true,

Unknown: 22:39

yes, but like not getting out of my pajamas all day, and unless, like, obviously, to take the dog out, but just reading, listening to podcasts, listening to auto book, audio books, binging, what just or doing absolutely nothing is like the best self

Kristen Daukas: 22:54

care. Yeah, the man travels largely during the week, so on the rare occasion that he leaves on like a Sunday. It is my heaven. And I when I know this, I plan in advance so I don't leave the house and then, and he typically takes really, really early flights so I can sleep in as long as the dogs will let me, which lately has not been a very good thing. And but then I know I can just get up. I don't have to get dressed. I can just putts. And I putts. That's my thing. That's what I love to do. Like, where you kind of squirrel your way through the house and you don't necessarily have a to do list. It's like, you go, you start on one project, and then you turn around, you go, Oh, I can do that. Oh, look, I need to straighten up the whatever. And before you know it, you have all these little micro things. And I know it sounds really weird, but those are my favorite days that just kind of random, that go with the flow, and there's no agenda. If you want to stop and have a mimosa on a Sunday, you can, if you want to eat cookie dough, you can, and you can do this every day, but obviously, you know, Monday through Friday, most of us do have some kind of professional obligations that we have to so it's just not the same. Just nice to have that day where you're just doing a whole lot of nothing,

Unknown: 24:11

Yep, yeah. And added bonus,

Kristen Daukas: 24:13

if it's bad weather, because then you're like,

Unknown: 24:15

yes, a rainy Sunday. I love a rainy Sunday. Yes, it's the best. Yeah, this

Kristen Daukas: 24:23

is God's way of telling me, stay home, exactly,

Unknown: 24:27

cozy up. Watch something ridiculous, you know. And doesn't have to be educational. It can be silly. And then, you know, just cuddle up with your pets if you have them, yep, and yeah. And just enjoy the time. Because, you know life is life is short, and sometimes you just need to stop and pause and realize that the act of not doing something is doing something absolutely yourself,

Kristen Daukas: 24:53

well. And I think too, you know, going back to our parents, you know that whole, you know, in first, you know, early in. And laid out type attitude, and you need to stick around. You need to stay with that company and get your gold watch. Is that we realize that if we were working in a traditional corporate job, you know, we want to quit, we give them the common courtesy of a two week notice, right? But if they want to get rid of us, I mean, boom, you're done. You're done tomorrow, you're done today. And here's your we need your all of your stuff, and they won't think twice about it. And to think that, I think it's a very interesting moment when you finally realize that everyone is replaceable. Because definitely feeling that you're irreplaceable is a youth thing, and definitely into your 20s. And then I don't know if it takes that first time getting fired or laid off or whatever, that you go and you just like, I'm not. I'm not. And that's another cool thing about our generation, is we were definitely the generation that said there is no company loyalty, and that was really hard for our parents to get and it sounds like that exactly with your with your folks, and it was the same with my mom and stepdad, you know, it was like, you've got to stay and, you know, you can't be bouncing around. And I'm like, sometimes

Unknown: 26:06

you're forced to do that. And, you know, funny enough, like, my dad was the one that suggested I go into advertising. When I was younger, I wanted to be a marine biologist and work with beluga whales. But then, because I had childhood asthma, I found out I couldn't dive anymore, because it was, like, a very serious health risk. And so he was really good, you're created, yeah, spree, you know, I didn't want to, like, go diving and then have an air bubble. I'm like, Yeah, I want to be able to have a life. And he my dad's like, you're a creative. You like to write. So what about advertising? Thanks so much, dad, because it was a, it's a very hard career that isn't stable. And I were the first agency I was at, of course, started my career at the time the.com bubble burst. So of course, you know, advertising goes and I went to lunch and came back. And in the time I was gone, there was a mass layoff at my agency, so I came back to see my friends crying. And, you know, after the agency had told us, no, everything's fine, because all around, I was living in Chicago, all around agencies were laying people off, like, we're fine, no, and I later got laid off in a subsequent layoff. But it was like a real I was like, Oh my gosh, this is, this is scary. So, yeah, we and we went through the recession. We went through like, you know, with 911 like, we've been through things. People forget that every generation goes through things, but we've

Kristen Daukas: 27:21

been through a lot of things. We've been through a lot of things, and the a number of things that we have been through is really kind of the reason why we are such a tough nut generation. It's like, Let me have it.

Unknown: 27:36

What next it exactly.

Kristen Daukas: 27:39

And I was good. There was a question I was going to ask you talking about, I'll think about brain fart, but, yeah, I mean, that's the reason we are the fafo, as they like to say, the up around and find out generation. It's like, you cannot hurt me anymore. We were lash key kids. We had the whole Have you seen me? You know, the milk carton, things we had, the 11 o'clock announcement that came across a TV parents, do you know where your children are? It's like, Well, God, I hope you do. Yeah. I mean, the recession we had, you know, the war we I mean it, there's so many things. It's like, No wonder we're all just twisted individuals. I mean, yeah,

Unknown: 28:22

and we watched the space shuttle blow up live, and our parents were like, you know, we have discussions about, how do you feel about that? No, I mean, because I remember going those, you know, yes, kids were watching, but the kids of those astronauts, especially the teacher, watched their parents explode. And I was just like, and we're thinking, no discussion, nothing, you know, we're just Yeah, and we would watch the news at night. Very interesting. The teachers

Kristen Daukas: 28:48

that will the AV card in just turned it off. Fine, yeah, okay, pull out your books and turn to chapter four

Unknown: 28:57

and keep going. We're like, what? Yeah. And we would watch the news at night, right? And our we see all the bad things happening. I don't remember my parents ever going so what do you think? And how are you feeling? No, it's like, I don't It's nice that you have feelings about whatever it is, whether it's the world or your own life, but you keep doing go do the dishes, go to your homework, go to bed, you'll be fine.

Kristen Daukas: 29:17

Get a good night's sleep, you'll be fine. Yeah? Just minor flesh wound, yeah. And then, you know, think about it, but yet we having then, like our young adult years, be in the 90s, that was a pretty cool time, right? Pretty cool time. And then we got gobsmacked with freaking 911 Yes, and you're just like, and I truly think that if any of us had any innocence and grandiose ideas, that the world was a wonderful place that was that came crashing down. Then I was so distinctly because we were living in Pennsylvania, and I was terrified because I was like, how did this happen in America? Like I was just so, and I really think at least for me, if where that, I won't call it bitter point. But by that point, I was, was like, 33 was like, it truly the end of innocence, you know, whatever. And you know, I had small children. My youngest wasn't even born. My middle had just been born six months before, and you're just like, Oh my God. And so, like, we definitely know life has never been the same, you know, since we grew up. But it definitely

Unknown: 30:35

whatever is before that. I mean, yes, the World Trade Center had been bombed, I think, in the in the 90s and then, but before that, the only time America was under attack was Pearl harbors, and that was so far removed. And then, yeah, 911 like it, yeah, it. It was such a it was so horrible, because we're watching it in live, you know, live time happening. And then our country really has changed. And I was just, we went to New York. It was my niece and nephews, first time in New York. So of course, because I lived there, I had to go, right? And we went to the 911 Memorial. And it's the first time that I've been to something where that's, you know, historical, where I'm, like, I lived through this. This has a, did you cry? Different impact? No, I didn't. But it was, it was very everyone. It was only time to somewhere. I was like, very quiet, but also I'm like, this is a grave site. I'm walking on a grave site. And I actually happened to, I moved to New York right after 911 and my, a friend of mine, we went and worked at the respite centers for the Red Cross. So I was down there twice and saw the change in the the work, you know, the emergency workers, from like, optimistic to totally defeated. And I remember the smell, number everything, but, yeah, it's, it was like that. I know, you know, for kids to see that that were younger has to have an impact. But as an adult, I think we had a better understanding of, like, okay, America, isn't we can be attacked like and what's gonna happen? And it wasn't, it wasn't a good point. And even now today, I'm like, What is going on with, you know, not to get political,

Kristen Daukas: 32:08

but that kind of goes back to, you know, I'm just gonna call it what it is, the BS that we were fed as kids growing up. This is the greatest country in the world. You can do anything you want to do. You can be anything you can if you work hard, you can have all the things that you want. And the reason why I asked if you cried is because I'm a pretty tough knot, like, I'm very not a lot of emotion, and that going down that escalator, yeah, I just, I just remember, I was almost hypervent, not like crying, but I was just like, in tears, and I was just like, I had to take a lot of deep breaths.

Unknown: 32:45

Yeah, I mean, I felt myself, but I was with I mean, my niece and nephew are almost 13 and almost 11. I didn't want to, like, cry in front of them, because my my nephew has studied it. My niece was asking a lot of questions, but, yeah, I could feel myself. I'm like, and I'm like, I I'm glad I saw it. I never want to go

Kristen Daukas: 33:04

there again. Yeah, no, I agree. It's, yeah, it's hard. It's, it's very I almost think that has to be our equivalent of our parents. If your your dad served the time that I took my dad, who was a vet, who was a Vietnam vet, to the wall, it has to be a very similar reaction that you get out of that we're hammering in on 33 minutes. So let's do some pop culture real quick, and then we're gonna sign off. So back to the 80s favorite, favorite band,

Unknown: 33:38

Duran. Duran, and

Kristen Daukas: 33:39

who were you gonna marry Simon labonne? I wanted the lead singer, Roger. I was the drummer. I was the drummer.

Unknown: 33:46

And then I would say Depeche Mode became my second favorite, where my sister and brother would call them depressed mode, right? They still do, but I don't care. I love them. Anyways, yeah, for me,

Kristen Daukas: 33:55

it was the police and, yeah, it's so funny just listening to all of these bands. And so are you aware there's a thing called the 80s cruise?

Unknown: 34:07

Yes, yes, really, yeah.

Kristen Daukas: 34:10

I really want to go, but you have to, like, you know, get your reservations, like, a year in advance. And I just, every year I look at all the different bands and artists that are going to be on. I'm like, Oh, that would be so much fun. That'd be, that'd be a, that would be a party boat, definitely.

Unknown: 34:29

Gen X note, we know how to party,

Kristen Daukas: 34:31

yeah, yeah. And, you know, I was just, um, with, I think it was my middle and I was having this conversation. We were doing the whole, gosh, were we at a bar? We were, oh yes, it was a going away party for one of my friends, and the topic of fireball. Fireball came out, and I've been standing there with another Gen X, and we're like, Yeah, but when we were partying, our had goal. Gold flakes in it. 24 karat gold. Yes,

Unknown: 35:02

gold schlugger slogger. Yes. That was the old because I, like, I wouldn't do a mine eraser. And some of the I was, like, the rumble minutes, or I'm like, But gold saga, I thought I was so sophisticated because of the gold. And that stuff tasted disgusting. It was like cough medicine. But, you know, it had gold in it. So

Kristen Daukas: 35:19

look how cool I am. So anytime any of the kids are doing like, Fireball, I'm like, you rookies, ours had gold in it,

Unknown: 35:28

are the kids that are like, I'm gonna try Everclear. And I'm like, Are you insane? We didn't drink it straight, yeah. And then they're like, spitting it out. And it's like, we put it in things because we weren't that dumb. Her, we were dumb, and then we learned better. Hurricane

Kristen Daukas: 35:44

parties. Hello, Hurricane punch, put it in the

Unknown: 35:50

bathtub. Things

Kristen Daukas: 35:51

that we did. It's like, Would you ever now say, Hey, give me a cup of that juice out of the bathtub.

Unknown: 35:59

Nope. Also, because I know if I had one cup of that, I'd probably feel real bad then, or, who knows, at this point in my life, like one drink can put me in bed for a day. Four drinks, I'm fine. I don't you know. You never know. So not that I want four drinks, but it's like, it's just never

Kristen Daukas: 36:14

know what you're guessing. Go, oh, okay, bye. This was fun. This is a lot of fun. So I'm gonna sign off, and then you and I can continue towards the end. And so everybody, thank you so much. Thank you Blythe for joining us and taking a couple of trips down memory lane, almost in the quite a few decades. Did we touch on tonight? So everybody, thanks for listening, and until the next time we meet, may your drinks be strong and your will be stronger. See ya. As the saying goes, you don't have to go home, but you can stay here, and that's a wrap for this week's episode. A big thanks to my guests for sharing their story and to you for listening. Don't forget to share the show with your friends and spread the words and if you'd like to be a guest on the show, the link is in the show notes till next time. Cheers you.