Ministry Coach: Youth Ministry Tips & Resources

Create a Healthy Worship Culture in Youth Ministry with these 5 Tips

• Kristen Lascola • Episode 194

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Is your desire to create a healthy and authentic worship culture?  Today, we will be sharing 5 tips to help enhance your youth group's worship experience, not simply for the outward physical expression, but the inward spiritual connection. This episode will hopefully offer a jolt of encouragement for those times you might question the impact of your student ministry based on what you see—or don't see—during worship.

Are you looking to grow the size and health of your youth ministry? Check out
GrowYourYouthMinistry.com

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You may also enjoy these episodes:

(#051) Youth Ministry Planning - Youth Group Midweek Schedule

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Speaker 1:

Are you struggling with the worship culture in your youth ministry? Well, today we're gonna give you five tips to help you out.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to the Ministry Coach Podcast where we bring you weekly tips and tactics to help you fast track the growth and health of your youth ministry.

Speaker 1:

My name is Jeff Laskola and this is Kristen Laskola, and today we are talking about worship in youth ministry and the idea for this episode came from somebody who wrote us a question I believe they were a youth pastor and this youth pastor was a little concerned about the worship culture in his youth group. He said he doesn't know why kids don't raise their hands, close their eyes. They seem a little disinterested or disengaged. And he had some questions of how do we know and it's a great question how do we know if worship is going well? What kind of worship culture should we attempt to be cultivating in our youth ministries? Are there any external signals that we can look at that give us maybe some kind of hope that something spiritual is happening during worship? We're going to just jump right into it. Number one I would say this to Mr Youth Pastor out there that-.

Speaker 2:

Or Mrs Youth Pastor. What was the guy? I?

Speaker 1:

remember who wrote the question, Jeff.

Speaker 2:

Nevermind.

Speaker 1:

But thank you for being equal opportunistic. I appreciate that For the girls. So outward signs can tell us something. They're not totally irrelevant, but they usually don't tell us the whole story when it comes to worship. So I think it's safe to say as youth pastors, if every kid in our youth group was closed eyes and raised hands and singing out we would look around and be like excellent.

Speaker 2:

And we would leave that night Not as creepy as that, but pleased with what you're witnessing.

Speaker 1:

Excellent Well.

Speaker 2:

Waggling your fingers.

Speaker 1:

This worship is going swimmingly. I think we would leave and like give ourselves a little pat on the back, like look at my youth group and all the kids are engaged, and some of that could be justified. Not our pat on the back to ourselves, but like that feeling of wow, like something's happening. But see, on the flip side of that, what if something external isn't super visible or tangible? Then we leave discouraged, with sometimes that opposite feeling of like why are we even doing this? Like we're just playing songs? What is this a concert? You guys could care less. But, as we know, body language does not tell the entire story. And I think back to when I was in junior high. I went to youth group and I loved worship. I can still remember that feeling when they would sing as the deer and I would be so excited because I loved it. Or we used to do a lot more of the um, what do you call it when, like it's the guy part, the girl part and it's like call, and response.

Speaker 2:

I don't know Like the guys would sing this part and it's like call and response.

Speaker 1:

I don't know like, like the guys would sing this part and the girls would sing this part and I would just be like, yes. And I'd look at my friends when you could tell like the song was coming and we'd be like, yeah, because those were the songs that just hit my soul and I loved. Now, what are you gonna say?

Speaker 2:

oh, just think of summer loving.

Speaker 1:

But that is not a worship song. Could we change it to that, if it was like we fell in love with jesus at summer camp?

Speaker 2:

I guarantee sometime during the early 90s there was a remake of that song. They probably ruined it for everyone christians will do that why.

Speaker 1:

But what I was going to say is I would have never, in a million years as a junior, hire, no matter how much I was feeling, it closed my eyes or lifted my hands during worship Insecure. Oh, so insecure. Even if I had mustered up the courage to do it, the whole time I would have been thinking my hands are up, my hands are up. My hands are in the air, or anyone else's hands in here Is anyone looking at me?

Speaker 1:

Should my hand stay up the whole time? Can I bring them down during the bridge and then up during the chorus? What are other people doing? Should I peek and see? And it would have so distracted from worship, it would have been a hindrance to my worship life because I wasn't mature enough to have my eyes off of myself. You know, and that's what true worship is, right, it's surrender, it's just that total abandonment of self. And I think we just need to have a realistic view of, maybe, where students are at, in that they might be feeling that song and those words and love it, but they, their body language, might tell you something totally different and that deep, mysterious Holy spirit work could be going on in them and it's just not visible from the outside. So, all that to say, don't be discouraged when you're like, oh man, they like I've seen other groups and they're into it. And why are my kids like just sitting there like bumps on a log and they're not participating and they act like it's so boring? There could be something going on in their hearts and their minds and their spirit that you are just unaware of. Because I know that's who I was in junior high. I was a Christian. I love the Lord, but I would never have raised my hands. Then I'd go home and listen to worship and absolutely love it. So don't be discouraged.

Speaker 1:

And I think it's this weird tension that I experienced with my own youth group students of like. They always mess around during worship. That's when I have to do probably the most discipline, where I go around and tap on the shoulder and put your phone away and you two need to separate. And this is your last warning. I do that for the whole 25 minutes during worship and all my leaders do too. However, we take a break once a year from worship during this big outreach event. We do called the battle and I cannot tell you how many kids come up to me and they're like when are we starting worship back up, when is worship?

Speaker 1:

And always, every year, they do this and every year it catches me off guard because I'm like you people care, because you're always chatting and giggling and nudging each other and trying to trip each other and bunny ears in each other and you're so sad we're not doing worship. And then it always hits me as like I have no clue what's going on in their heart, mind and soul. And, yes, sometimes external clues do tell us a story. But just be warned and be careful, they don't tell the whole thing. So another thing that surprises me a lot is when I go around and I ask students like what's your favorite part of youth group? They often say worship. And again it kind of catches me off guard of, like we do all this fun, crazy stuff and you like your favorite part is worship, like, okay, you aren't always giving me that vibe, I am glad to know that. So another trick here not trick that sounds tricky. Another pro tip, I guess, is make sure you're playing worship that your students connect with.

Speaker 2:

So as the deer as the deer if you know that song.

Speaker 1:

Can you please comment below, Because I'd like to know I'm not alone in my deer's pant or panteth Can't say I've seen either Cause they're always right where the water is. That's the only thing I've ever seen them drinking. Panteth Sounds weird. Make sure you're playing worship they like. Is that what we're talking about? Because you and I know there's nothing like hearing like the beginning of the song and you're so excited and I think sometimes people think that shallow like oh, it's just because you like the way it sounds and you're not really focused on the meaning, but I think here's the best way I can explain it when I hear worship in my own language.

Speaker 1:

So if I try to sing a hymn and there's a whole group of people out there that think hymns are the most spiritual songs in the world, I don't know why that is. If it's based off of the scriptural truth, it doesn't have to be a hymn, and I think that's why hymns get like the. They're in the upper echelon of worship music, because it's like straight out of the Bible. Well, a lot of worship music is and it is actually in my language. I don't want to say panteth anymore.

Speaker 1:

Maybe at one point I did, I don't and so when you do worship that they prefer connect with the way it sounds and it's current and it.

Speaker 1:

Then it's like whoa scripture and the truth is being sung in a harmony that resonates with who I am, and I just think there is something so profound and powerful about that, because if we're asking them to sing songs that are maybe of a different era or they don't connect with the words, if the word fetter is in it, I don't think they are understanding what they're singing. I do love that song, but I don't pick it for my youth group because we have visitors, we have new Christians, we have new Christians, we have baby Christians and like I'm going to really say like a fetter in my worship music to them, these are 11 year olds, they have to understand what they're singing and I think that's biblical, because the Bible says worship in spirit and in truth, the truth of God's word. I know that, but you have to also know the truth of what you're singing and not just words that sound very pious, but words that you can actually say.

Speaker 1:

this is true for me. I don't know if a 11 year old can say like a fetter is true for them, so make sure it's hitting them at their level.

Speaker 2:

There's a reason why there's worship singers like Jana Elira for children, because she I was just thinking in the kids' classrooms you're also not singing. There's a reason why there's worship singers like Jana Elira for children, because she I was just thinking you don't. In the kids' classrooms you're not also not singing.

Speaker 1:

Fetter, Exactly it's like. So they need to be able to understand what they're singing, connect with what they're singing. It has to be put in the terms. Kids are simple and energetic. Okay, that's for little kids. No-transcript. The soul of a 14 year old. Whatever age you work with, make sure you're keeping worship relevant to the age and stage that they're at, Just like everything else we do. We customize our messages, everything else we do. We customize our messages, our games, everything to hit the youth that we're serving. Why would worship?

Speaker 2:

be any different.

Speaker 1:

We can't bore them to death, you know, and we might say no, but these words they just might not be there. It's got to sound like it's from this century in their language. They have to be able to recognize it, as this was for me. I can sing this this is not meant for a faith that is ancient. It's meant for a faith that is ancient and at the same time, so current and relevant. And I think that was a huge disconnect I had growing up is that Christianity felt like it was for old people, and so, while in my heart I knew it was true, it was hard for me to really embrace Christian culture because it felt so for lack of a better word fuddy-duddy. It just felt so like-.

Speaker 2:

Outdated.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I couldn't connect with it. So I was like is it all like nerdy old people that are Christians? And so I had to know like someone who has the same like age and stage of life in me is also making great music is also doing things for Jesus. It's not just people with gray hair, you know, it's like oh my gosh people that, like, speak my language, also love Jesus and are making stuff so that I can connect with him.

Speaker 1:

And I think that puts this subconscious thought into kids head is like this faith is still new and relevant, even though it's, of course, old.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I think when you put that disconnect to with like this is music that we only listen to and we only sing at church, I think it kind of you can kind of like a staple your faith to that too. Like here's, we only sing at church. I think it kind of you can kind of like a staple your faith to that too. Like here's how we act at church, here's who we are at church. But then the rest of the week, that's when I do all the things that I actually want to do.

Speaker 1:

And it becomes this just divide.

Speaker 2:

You know, and I think, if I mean by all means, if your kids love fetter and hymns and all that and they're all connecting, then go for it, keep doing it. But I think in general, what you're saying is basically speak their language. Use the music that they enjoy and that they can listen to throughout the week. Like what a huge witness to be able to be in your parents' car and they're playing worship music and it's relevant and it sounds good, it's enjoyable. And someone who's not a Christian might say who is this? Oh, it's enjoyable. And someone who's not a christian might say who is this? Oh, it's just whatever artist, instead of being playing like, here's a hymn of organs that you're never probably going to want to listen to ever again.

Speaker 1:

You think like so are christian, and here's what I always laugh about is when people hyper spiritualize those things. I'm like right, you realize, at some point those were brand new and current. It was the elvis presley of its time, and before that it was flutes and liars and hymns were cutting edge. So it's like, don't just be. It's some weird nostalgia that I I just don't get. But as long as worship is biblical and truthful, it can be from 2024.

Speaker 2:

It should exist outside of just the church.

Speaker 1:

I love that point. I think that's really important. All right, so that was a long one. But number two, camp worship is totally different. So give up the dream, okay, because here's what we do as youth pastors. We see the way our kids worship at camp and then we come back to youth group and we're like, excuse me, where is the camp vibe? And it just never will be. And you know, I've thought about it a little bit of like why, and my kids are the same, like they worship so well at camp and well, like I can really say, but you just see a difference.

Speaker 2:

Well done with your worship.

Speaker 1:

Your worship everybody I will be giving you a score from one to ten on your worship you get a sticker on your bible but you know it, there is something different about it.

Speaker 1:

There is something, and I think, everything about camp is different absolutely you're in this isolated world where you've had all week for these walls to come down and what I realized I was thinking a lot about it today is because you're in that isolated camp world, the walls continue to stay down. So, like at youth group, it's like they've been at school, they've been doing homework, They've been at practice. Now they're all amped up to see their friends. They're hopped up on Dr Pepper and Sour Patch Kids and then like we play a game, and not that they can't focus, but it's just like they're in a different mode. Their walls might come down, you know, maybe by the last song or something like that, but it's just not the total vulnerability that comes at camp from living in this week long.

Speaker 1:

My walls are down stage and just being in this world, away from home, away from responsibility, and like. I think what we're looking for in students is self-abandonment, Like I said before, and camp is the perfect environment to foster that. It's hard to do that in two hours at youth group total self-abandonment For students. I think adults can kick into that gear much quicker. You know, you see adults go from wrangling their kids, checking in their kids, then on their knees, hands raised, eyes closed weeping.

Speaker 2:

It's a break from those kids. I know they're like hallelujah free at last free at last.

Speaker 1:

But I think adults can do that and kids, I think it's harder for them to find that self-abandonment on that in that weekly youth group or weekly church service. So again all that to say don't, don't get too discouraged if you're like, but I know they can do it because I've seen it at camp. Well, yeah, you have.

Speaker 2:

And so have I. Some of it can carry over if you are like, as long as you go to camp and they'll play newer songs or ones that your students may have not heard before, and at first, like a couple, first couple of nights, they're like wait, what do we do? What are the words? But then I feel like over time, throughout camp, those all of a sudden become their favorite songs. So to kind of keep a little bit of the momentum going, it's good to put some of those songs into your rotation if you don't already play them.

Speaker 1:

Yes, I agree. So number four is uh, oops, nope. Number three don't project the state of your own soul onto them, and we've been kind of taking this throughout this whole episode. I think it's really important to remember. It is very biblical to sing. There's worship leaders and songs all throughout the Bible. Very good.

Speaker 1:

However, it is not the only way to worship, and worship could be happening all week with your kids that you just don't know about and don't see. So what I would love to do is encourage youth pastors to make sure they understand worship goes beyond that four or five songs and teach students what a lifestyle of worship is, because a lot of kids are like I'm not into singing, I don't want to just sit here and sing. A lot of kids love it and they totally connect with the song. For me it depends on the day. Sometimes I worship through song and I'm like, yes, like this is exactly what I needed, and I can get into it by about song two or three usually.

Speaker 1:

But some days it's like I just need to be alone with God's word. I just need to be alone in nature, like getting my mind blown by what he's done or made. I just need to get alone in prayer. I mean worship is giving glory to God and abandoning yourself and putting the focus on him. So is that kids using their gifts and serving others? Is that? You know some of the other ways that I described, but make sure your students understand that a lifestyle of worship is what we're after, not that they, you know, close their eyes, raise their hands for four songs and then forget about worship for the rest of the week. You know, and like you were talking about the songs that they really like, if your students want I remember back in the day they used to like give worship CDs, you know from the worship band or whatever, and I would always buy it.

Speaker 1:

I was like heck, yeah, all the best songs we sing at church.

Speaker 1:

You can make a playlist for your students on Spotify and just say, hey, you guys, like if you ever have a morning where you're getting ready early and you have alone time, or on your way to school, or you know, if you run cross country and can listen to some I don't know just make a playlist for them and they can take that worship into their life wherever they go and you might see a heart change for that too. And I think students just need a model and an example of it too. So if you are wondering why they're not engaging, a great way to create that place where people think, oh, this is safe to do this is you and your student leaders encouraging your student leaders. You don't want to ever perform like everyone, close your eyes and raise your hands, but you could just encourage your student leaders, start there and say hey, if you're ever feeling like you just love what's happening during worship and want to raise your hands, I want you to feel the freedom to do it.

Speaker 1:

And you as the youth pastor, if you're feeling it, if you're adult leaders you know I have some of my adult leaders that do it and they might be the only one in the room and it's still, you know, mean something. Newer kids don't quite understand. Sometimes they'll nudge each other and like, and you know, point at people cause they don't get it you know, and so we.

Speaker 1:

That's what I'm saying is don't project the state of your own soul onto the kids, because they are at such a different place and their faith of being able to understand. Why would someone raise their hands and lift their head while singing a song?

Speaker 1:

That's weird and it doesn't mean they're bad, it just means they're not you and they shouldn't be here. The youth pastor. So hopefully you're more spiritually mature than a 13 year old. So we need to be patient with where they're at and just gently lead them along through examples of leaders in the room and creating that place of like this is okay. And another really practical tip is turn the lights down. That is a game changer to turn your lights as low as they go. Obviously we need leaders in the room to make sure no shenanigans are happening. But the one of the best worship sessions I was ever a part of and this is not practical to do every week, but it just shows the power of the ambience in the room what was called bird box worship, and our high school pastor turned all the lights off at camp. So camp is different, as we talked about, but it was winter camp up in the mountains, no lights anywhere, turned off all the lights. But they did worship in the dark and I heard students like sobbing, like weeping, like.

Speaker 1:

I caught a silhouette of a few people because of like the windows and just on their knees and just like when you know nobody's looking at you and no one's focused on you, you can worship on a whole other level, and so what we can recreate on a weekly basis for that is as much darkness as possible so that people aren't focused on each other or wondering who's looking at me. And you know, hyper aware of themselves, do anything you can to get their eyes off of themselves. Again, that's worship. You're smirking. What do you want?

Speaker 2:

to say Just adding the darkness to your ministry's worship. Is that what I said? You said add darkness or something. I just thought it was funny as I'm talking.

Speaker 1:

You just have this slight little smirk like a junior go ahead what? Did I say what did I slip up?

Speaker 2:

oh, he's messed up. He said darkness lack of light.

Speaker 1:

It does sound kind of creepy. So, yeah, model it if it's genuine, you know, and create an ambience that fosters that. So we have like little market lights that we keep on but we turn everything else off, and that's really helpful. But students, they're self-conscious and that's a huge barrier to external displays of worship. So, wrapping it up, if they aren't doing what you deem as typical of a deep worshiper doesn't mean it's not happening, and make sure you give them opportunities to worship throughout the week. Teach them what that is like, to keep that going in their life.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and we also did an episode a while ago just in regards to youth group for midweek schedules kind of like the order of things, and you have a really intentional and great way of kind of bringing the fun and excitement of a youth youth group and then sort of bring it through worship, kind of calming them down into the message, because I know that can be a problem a lot of times where it's like if you do games after the message.

Speaker 2:

They're too squirrely and excited, or you know, so it's kind of a good way of doing that, so make sure you check out that episode. All right, right now we're going to do a question of the day, which is actually just a would you rather, which is would you rather go one week without brushing your teeth or one week without showering? Brushing my teeth yeah, I think I would say the same I would just try to get by on gum and that's a junior highway around it.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I just use breath mints all the time I would but showering.

Speaker 1:

I don't know if there's really a really great replacement for that some of my junior high boys don't do anything exactly for days and days the whole camp, the entire time.

Speaker 2:

They're not doing it. They arrive and and they smell All right. Community comment of the day comes from Carl Schmittke, who says you are awesome. I'm so excited to be taking this course to help make my ministry even better. I'm 52 and, using these tips and techniques, our youth group is constantly growing, so wow.

Speaker 2:

Thank you, Carl Carl's actually referring to our youth ministry growth accelerator program which, if you're interested, make sure you check out growyouryouthministrycom. But Carl is a member. We are very happy he is part of the program and his youth group is doing amazing. Win, win, win, win. Thank you guys, so much for watching and listening and we'll see you next time.

Speaker 1:

Are you struggling with the worship culture in your youth ministry today? That is what we're going to talk about next time.