What Are the Implications of Parental Kidnapping Both During and Post-Divorce?

A listener writes in and asks, "What Are the Implications of Parental Kidnapping Both During and Post-Divorce?" Matthew Brickman answers your most frequently asked questions about divorce as he goes over several key points:

• Assume nothing.
• Know who you are before you get married. 
• Know who you're getting married to. 
• Know the laws and statutes in the state you live in.
• Don't take advice from anyone who isn't a legal professional in the state in which you're getting married and living in.

If you have a matter, disagreement, or dispute you need professional help with then visit iMediate.com - Email mbrickman@ichatmediation or Call (877) 822-1479

Matthew Brickman is a Florida Supreme Court certified family and appellate mediator who has worked in the 15th and 19th Judicial Circuit Courts since 2009 and 2006 respectively. But what makes him qualified to speak on the subject of conflict resolution is his own personal experience with divorce.

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You're Not the Only One - The Agony of Divorce: The Joy of Peaceful Resolution

Matthew Brickman
President iMediate Inc.
Mediator 20836CFA
iMediateInc.com

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ABOUT MATTHEW BRICKMAN:
Matthew Brickman is a Supreme Court of Florida certified county civil family mediator who has worked in the 15th and 19th Judicial Circuit Courts since 2009 and 2006 respectively. He is also an appellate certified mediator who mediates a variety of small claims, civil, and family cases. Mr. Brickman recently graduated both the Harvard Business School Negotiation Mastery Program and the Negotiation Master Class at Harvard Law School.

Transcript

Mediate This! Podcast: 0:00

Hi, my name is Sydney Mitchell. Hi, I'm Matthew Brickman, Florida Supreme court mediator. Welcome to the Mediate This! Podcast where we discuss everything mediation and conflict resolution.

Matthew Brickman: 0:14

I had a listener write in and asked , what are the implications of parental kidnapping both during and post-divorce? And is it different with a paternity action? So first, let's talk about , uh, parental kidnapping and a paternity action. So it all depends if one of the parties has filed the Petition for Paternity or not. Um, if somebody has not filed the Petition for paternity, and if the mother wishes to , uh, move away and go anywhere in the world that she pleases, she is allowed to do so as long as nothing has been filed. If the , uh, generally the father has filed a petition for paternity and then the mother decides to leave, well, the mother can leave, but the child's will be returned back to , uh, the state of Florida or back to the child's home state. Um , being that , um, she left after a petition to establish paternity was filed. So what are the implications of parental kidnapping both during and post-divorce? So let's just say that it is a divorce, and I've had this where , um, the mother , uh, was a stay at home mom. She had two kids. Dad goes to work and he comes home and she's gone and he has no idea where she is. Um, and he's looking for his kids, looking for his kids. He's calling the police. They have put out a bulletin trying to find him. And what happened? Well, turns out that , uh, being a stay-at-Home Mom, she got into gaming and she met some guy online gaming and decided that she was gonna take the kids and moved to Texas , um, and be with this guy that she met online. And so , um, so what happened, you know, during that divorce proceeding was the children were ordered to return home. Now she refused to come. She wanted to stay with her new guy that she found online gaming. And so the kids were then returned. Um, and uh, then a long distance parenting plan was set up. The children lived primarily with the father, and then the mother had time sharing . Um , so, you know, it is never a good idea to kidnap kids. Um, it's never a good idea to hide them. Now , uh, what about post-divorce? So , in the parenting plan, there's an entire section , uh, called jurisdiction, and it reads this. The parenting plan is for the purposes of the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act, the International Child Abduction Remedies Act 42 USC section 1 1 6 0 1, et cetera , the Parental Kidnapping Prevention Act, and the convention on civil aspects of International Child Abduction Enact of the Hague on October 25th, 1980, and for all other state and federal laws. So once the parenting plan is set up, everybody is covered by all the parental kidnapping , um, acts. And so , um, generally what we put in here as well to help , uh, protect parental kidnapping is that , um, in the international travel section is that nobody is allowed to go to a country that is not a signatory on the Hague Convention because again, this first paragraph that I read, you said that the parenting plan is for the purposes of the Convention of Civil aspects and of international child abduction and act at the Hague on October 25th, 1980. So what does that mean? So if you go to , uh, the US State Department's website and you type in Hague Country's H-A-G-U-E, there's a whole number of countries that since 1980, have signed treaties with other countries saying that our government will cooperate with your government to return children if they happen to be kidnapped and brought to our country. And so in the event that kidnapping takes place, well then, you know, there's , uh, some relief that you can get your children back. If they go to a non Hague country, well, that means that that country has not signed the treaty and is not gonna cooperate and fine , you may never see your kid again. Um , so we put in the parenting plans that you're not allowed to go to a non Hague country that will not , uh, work with bringing the children back. Um, we also have language on who's holding passports and all the other documentation, the notarized letters of authorization and everything , um, that , um, let , um, government and travel agencies and airlines and stuff know that yes , um, these children are permitted to come for this period of time with this parent and are to be returned. Um, so what happens if , uh, they get kidnapped post-divorce? Well, let's just say hopefully you get your kids back, and if you do, well then odds are there may be supervised timesharing only because if a parent has kidnapped them once, what's gonna stop 'em from kidnapping again, a piece of paper , uh, a judicial order. You know, they obviously think they're above the law because they did it in the first place. So , um, what could potentially happen is, again, there's either no time sharing or there's going to be supervised time sharing to ensure that the kidnapping does not take place. Um , also another thing that can happen is a judge can order that , that, you know, if there is going to be time sharing that , uh, one parent is the only parent who's holding the passports that way, the parent who is the flight risk that already left, well , they will not have any documentation to allow them to show, to remove the children , uh, from the country. So, you know, hopefully that does not happen. But what I have seen , uh, a number of times is that during the pendency of the divorce, a parent , uh, just ups and leaves the state and goes elsewhere. Um, and then, you know, what happens is , um, even if that parent, and I'm thinking of one particular case where , uh, the mother left with the child and , uh, did come back when, when the judge ordered that the child returned, the mother did come back. Um, but the father ended up with the majority time sharing , held the passports. Um, you know, and so there were, you know, the mom already proved to be untrustworthy and a flight risk. And so , um, yeah, I mean, like, it was, it , it was even, even out of state travel was not permitted with the mother being that, you know, she had already done it once. Um, and so yeah, never a good idea. Don't kidnap your kids. Just follow the agreement. You know, the children under the law in the state of Florida, according to the statute, are entitled to both parents. Parents are not entitled to the children. The children are entitled to both parents. So it can definitely affect , uh, the final outcome if somebody wants to try to kidnap 'em during a divorce. Uh, but it will definitely change the parenting plan and a lot of the rules if it happens post-divorce. Um, if you've got questions about your particular state's laws and jurisdiction, definitely reach out to a local attorney to get legal advice. Um, if you do need help , uh, getting your kids back, definitely reach out to law enforcement and , uh, and or attorneys as well. And hopefully you've got all the proper language in your parenting plan to get your kids home safely.

Sydney Mitchell: 8:26

If you have a comment or question regarding anything that we discuss, email us at info@ichatmediation.com that's info@ichatmediation.com and stay tuned to hear your shout out and have your question answered here on the show.

Matthew Brickman: 8:42

For more information about my services or to schedule your mediation with me , either in person or using my iChat Mediation virtual platform built by Cisco Communications, visit me online@imedia.com . Call me at (561) 262-9121 toll free at 8 7 7 8 2 2 14 79 , or email me at m brickman@ichatmediation.com.