The Care Girl Podcast
The Care Girl Podcast
When Life Gives You Lemons a story on Resilience w/guest Stevie Pinkerton
Have you ever felt lost in the relentless hustle of a big city? Stevie Pinkerton, from the Pinkerton Agenda, shares his compelling journey from the high-pressure corporate world of New York City to a more meaningful, intentional life after the pandemic. Stevie opens up about his transition, working on major projects with the mayor's office and Google, and the emotional toll of the fast-paced lifestyle that led him to reassess his values. Through heartfelt reflections, he talks about the pandemic as an unexpected blessing that allowed him to realign with his true self. Stevie's insights on self-awareness and personal growth are not to be missed.
Join us as we explore the complexities of happiness and the pivotal role of mental health in Stevie's entrepreneurial journey. Stevie candidly discusses his struggles with suicide and the profound impact of therapy and supportive resources like the 988 suicide prevention hotline. The conversation highlights the dangers of comparison, the value of staying true to oneself, and the importance of a strong support network. We also touch on the significance of community and the vital role friends play in our overall well-being. Tune in to learn more about Stevie's inspiring story and his work with Mental Health Matters LLC and the Pinkerton Agenda Consulting Group.
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Hi everybody. It's Alex the Care Girl on the Care Girl podcast. Today I have a good friend with me, stevie Pinkerton with Pinkerton Agenda. I've been trying to get him on the podcast for over a year.
Speaker 2:It's been over a year, yeah.
Speaker 1:You know he has been off the scene, mia, and I'm excited to come on and tell his story. He's over here looking dapper, looking well-rested.
Speaker 2:Okay, you know you got to get eight hours of sleep.
Speaker 1:It's giving and it gave what it needs to give. Right, thank you, right. I just want to say, you know, I appreciate you for coming on and I want you to feel free. This couch is for us to just talk and have a conversation. I don't even know where to start because your story is so intense. It's so intense and we do have our house cat around, lola, so if she makes any guest appearances, just know you know she's in the thing, she's in the thing, she's in the thing. First of all, how are you? How are you and I'm saying like for real, transparently, give me a real synopsis of what's going on in your brain right now year and especially everything that I've gone through since May.
Speaker 2:So when you initially asked me that question, I immediately wanted to say, oh, I'm doing great, I'm doing good.
Speaker 1:And that's how automatic response Right.
Speaker 2:You know that that's just your go to. But to really answer that question, I take every day as it comes, honestly, and I think that's truly the best answer.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Take every day. Every day gets better, every day gets better, every day gets better.
Speaker 1:So when I met you, it was in personal injury.
Speaker 2:Yes, personal injury.
Speaker 1:And you were working for a certain neuro group and you were plotting your exit.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, yes, I was plotting that, and you were just you.
Speaker 1:You were always very, you were very, you were the light of the role, thank you. People gravitates toward, toward you, thank you know. And we, we kind of we kind of you know, stuck together a little bit like loose. So I was like, uh, tell me more about it, because you know I'm a neuro girl. Uh. So we kind of kind of learned it nerded out, nerded out on the neuro, but but I figured out. You told me you had a background in corporate. Tell me a little bit more about that corporate side and what was it like and kind of why you felt like you had to phase out of the corporate side.
Speaker 2:Okay, so I used to work in New York City and I worked in workforce development and then I transitioned over to project management. At that particular time I was working for a consulting firm in New York City and so I worked on several different projects, ranging from mental health which, as we all know, mental health is very, very important. So some small projects, some larger size projects. I also helped to charter a federal credit union in Southeast Queens. I worked on that particular project, also worked on a project out of the mayor's office with Google and all of their affinity groups as well.
Speaker 2:So I have really really made a mark in corporate America in New York City, really really made a mark in corporate America in New York City. And so what originally led me to transition out of New York City prior to the pandemic was I found myself just always in that New York City grind, that New York City hustle, and every day I wanted to be better than the next. And so, speaking of that, one of the companies that I that I worked for, had a model you just have to be 1% better every day 1% but me being me, me being Stevie, I took that model being 1% better every day and maximize that times 10.
Speaker 2:And so, you know, I was grinding every day, I was working hard every day. It was truly a New York City rat race. And I found myself between you know, running for the N or the Q train, you know, down to the financial district, just really feeling burnt out, trying to make an impact, trying to change the course of the bubble of workforce that I was working in, trying to make an impact in communities, in organizations, in the company that I worked for. And then the pandemic happened.
Speaker 1:Wow, and did that change a lot for you?
Speaker 2:You know, the pandemic changed a lot for me. Looking back on it, you know, as people say, it was a blessing in disguise. Blessing in disguise. It truly was a blessing in disguise, because it helped me to not only just slow down but to really pay close attention to the person that I had become and the person that I wanted to become. And, as they say in London, all the tubes mind the gap. I realized that there was a gap in between those two people and I started doing a lot of soul searching. It's just really try to find out who was I. Because the city had made a mark on me and I realized that at that time, the mark that it made, I didn't necessarily want to be that person. So, uh, but yes, to to kind of land that plane. The pandemic was a blessing in hindsight.
Speaker 1:Unpack that person that you had become. Who had you become?
Speaker 2:Oh, another loaded question.
Speaker 1:Like give me a rundown of who would I have run into. How would you have been if I would have met you in this stage?
Speaker 2:Okay. So I think it's noteworthy to mention that I have always been a kind person. I have always been a friendly person, I have always been a giving person as well as a loving person. But living in New York City, working in corporate America, and just in that rat race that never quite ended, I realized that I started to become very short-tempered.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:I realized that my views on the world were beginning to shape in a narrative that was not who I was back then at the core, and so I wanted to shed some light on to myself. Okay, Stevie, you've realized.
Speaker 2:You sat with yourself yeah, you had to, I had to, I had to sit with myself, and because there was an incident that happened and that particular incident, someone bumped into me and you know, I immediately felt myself becoming upset about it, and there was a moment where I stopped and said, okay, that's not who you are. You know things happen, you know you have to roll with the punches. Life will always give you punches, you will always step off the path, but how do you get back on that path? And so that was one of the questions that led me to really redefine who I, and so that was one of the questions that led me to really redefine who I, who I wanted to be.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I think everybody had that epiphany moment during COVID and for me, I left neuro for three years after COVID, went into my home care business and I had to digital school my children and I was like dang, I don't really know kids, you know, because I'm. You know I'm so used to working and just being out and just for being a provider and all that and it's like I got a chance to be home and digital school them and understand. You know, oh okay, this child needs that, that child needs that. And I think sometimes you do need to sit with yourself and understand, like you know, if you're getting short tempered because a lot of us are walking around on short fumes and then we have a medical emergency or mental breakdown to a breakdown.
Speaker 2:I mean, you know the state of the world alone is enough to yeah, you know, have anyone to to feel the common symptoms of anxiety. You know levels of depression and so when you're able to just kind of calm yourself down, get in the right head space and have meetings with yourself is what I would call it Sabbaticals. Have sabbaticals with yourself because you know you have meetings every day with everyone else and you know you go into your strategic planning and then you go and make it all work, make it all come together. Why not do that for yourself?
Speaker 1:Yeah, so do you, would you say? Do you say, would you say that you're a?
Speaker 2:you were a people, pleaser Cause I, I know I would you know, um, to a degree I was a people pleaser because, you know, I think, because of the line of work that that I was in and the line of work that I was in and the line of work that I'm in, and I think that it's important to note that we all are people pleasers on some level or on that spectrum.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you can't like get rid of that little piece?
Speaker 2:You know, just being a person, you know there's a human element to it all, and so we are all, in our own way, people pleasing. It's just how much of that of yourself are you giving over to pleasing others?
Speaker 1:That's true. So, moving to who you are right now, today, and something that you've overcome, let's go into why you felt like you needed to pivot and leave that big position from neuro and from personal injury. What kind of was your epiphany moment there?
Speaker 2:My epiphany moment was when I started feeling like I didn't want to go out anymore. You know, I started feeling like I didn't want to go out anymore. You know, I started feeling like I didn't want to talk to people anymore. I felt as though I would go in, I would have these meetings and I would talk about, you know, the product. I would talk about the service, and it started to just every day, started to bleed into the next day, even though the faces were different, but the dance was all the same.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And so I found myself feeling burnt out, but I couldn't quite put a finger on it. Because of the type of person that I am, you know, I'm always go, go, go, go go, and I didn't take enough time to take a step back and say what does Stevie in this moment in order to take care of myself, in order to take care of the people around me? So again, as the saying goes, put your life jacket on first.
Speaker 1:Yeah, put your life jacket on, put your breathing mask on first, and I think that sometimes people don't need to. They don't need to be afraid to evolve into something else.
Speaker 2:And I think this industry and other industries like it, prohibits people from evolving into other things because of the networking opportunities that exists within this ecosystem of personal injury, and a lot of times people feel as though it's this or not, and I can't tell you how many times I run across so many people within the industry that have confided in me and said that this is where I want to be. I can't see myself doing anything else, but I always encourage them. You have so many other skill sets. You could do so many other things, so why not take a bet on yourself?
Speaker 1:Well, I know there's a high, there's a high margin, uh, in this field, depending upon your profession and what you're doing. So sometimes you know they have dialed their lifestyle to that margin or higher, and they're, they're locked into into that role because they have to put on a front or they have to maintain a certain image to in order to get that type of social is that that you're not living your best, authentic self.
Speaker 1:I don't think that. I think some people have have gotten. They have never lived their best authentic self you're on to something they haven't, because it's hard. It's hard to do. First of all, you'd like to say you have to have that element of people please, and then you have to show up for the role and you have to, you know, sell or whatever you're doing. And it's easy to get caught up in this industry because it's very showy, it's very showy, you got all this gala. You got a lot going on.
Speaker 2:Who's who, who knows the who's who of who, and so it's a lot to contend with, which is why it's so important to that old self-picture you have to know yourself, because if you don't know I've come to realize and I have seen people come and go in the industry and if you don't know yourself and if you aren't strong in who you are, it is so easy to lose yourself in the industry and to follow those breadcrumbs of what you may deem is success in the industry.
Speaker 1:Yeah, what is?
Speaker 2:success to you.
Speaker 2:Success is, I'm probably going to sound cliche but I've learned this Success is the pursuit of happiness, and sometimes happiness is not. You know, sometimes people equate happiness to you know the large home, or you know the fancy car, or, again, knowing who's who. But I feel like happiness is different for every person, it's defined differently for every person, but for me it's truly about being my authentic self, being my genuine self, and knowing that I'm around people where I can bring my whole self and know that I'm in a safe environment to do so, and know that there's mutual respect and know that, again, this is all a human experience that we are having here.
Speaker 1:It is.
Speaker 2:And so if we treat each other as humans and we are deeply connected and involved and we are brave enough as my uh, one of my uh I call her my dear friend thought leaders and and um novelist I'm brené brown. Sometimes you have to brave the wilderness and sometimes that does.
Speaker 1:For me looks like humanizing that experience yeah, we were talking before we started because we were talking about, you know, the in-between stages. Sometimes you're in an in-between stage of like, hey, am I going to do this next or am I going to do that next? Where do you feel like you are today? And kind of like, what is your vision? Because I know you tiptoed into entrepreneurship. Tell us how has that journey gone and you know, what have you learned so far?
Speaker 2:I learned so far that there are no easy shortcuts. The only way out is to go through it. And how amazing it is to go through it and pick up all those gems along the way to make you better, to make your business better, to be a blessing to other people. So you know what's next for me is I'm going to continue to climb.
Speaker 1:Yeah. I will continue to lead and you have your own ceiling. Like I think, sometimes the comparison is what the thief enjoyed. A lot of people compare themselves to other people. You don't even know what their person is having, what is going on with their person and what's happening in their personal life.
Speaker 2:You don't know what it took for that person to get what they have and also to keep it. So you know, for me, I don't compare myself to anyone because you know, I'm so blessed and so fortunate to be in the lane that I am in. And I'm so blessed and so fortunate to be in the lane that I am in and I'm so happy of the work that I've done in this lane and I'm excited, truly excited, for the next chapter, for the next lane that I'm going to cross.
Speaker 1:Even if it's not known, Even if it's not known.
Speaker 2:And so you know again. Brene Brown, she said sometimes you have to go forth in fear and with the fear, why stop? You just have to go forth.
Speaker 1:You just got to keep going with it.
Speaker 2:You just have to keep going with it.
Speaker 1:So why mental health for you? Have you had a moment where you've had a mental breakdown or down? Or I know you are big on suicide prevention. Can you give us a moment of where you had to deal with that? Or you know you had to go through therapy?
Speaker 2:yes, uh. So you know, in full transparency, which is one of the reasons why I wanted to do this podcast is to share my story and, um, one of the reasons why I am such a huge advocate for suicide prevention hashtag 988 American 988. Yes, 988. And so one of the reasons why I'm so passionate about that is because I myself have lived experience with suicide.
Speaker 2:You know, this is something that I have gone through not once, but twice in my life, and so I could tell you there was a period of time in my life to where, you know, I'm 38 now. You know, life was happening and it was happening so fast and so often that there was a period of time in my life where I didn't know if I would even make 33 years old. And so, which is why mental health is so important and taking care of your mental health is so important, and therapy and counseling is so important. And taking care of your mental health is so important and therapy and counseling is so important because we experience traumas or micro traumas every single day, and you have to know how to deal with those traumas. You have to know how to have the coping skills and mechanisms to do so, and sometimes you know, we don't know how to start, we don't know when to start, and so therapy. I'm a huge advocate for therapy.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Huge advocate for hashtag 988 suicide prevention. Huge advocate for all services of mental health.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely so, through all of that what you just stated your circle Tell me about the key people in your circle and why. Why is it so important to have people like that in your life when you're going through different things and, just in general, just progressing?
Speaker 2:Because no matter who you are, where you are in life, we all need help. We can't do this thing called life alone, and so having a circle and a close circle is so important to your physical health, your emotional health, your mental health, your spiritual health, and so just having good people is important. It makes or it breaks you in times of sadness and in times of happiness too.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because they say when a man is on his own island or something like but we need people, we need people, we need each other.
Speaker 2:We need people and you know. And going back to your comment about people pleasing right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah, we still need people.
Speaker 2:We still need people At the end of the day. We still need people and I just have such a great close circle. You know my friends, like the beautiful, talented Andrea, my good friend Christian, you, who have stuck with me throughout this over a year, my friend Aaron, my friend Kelly, and the list goes on and on and on. Too many names to really even sit here and ramble on.
Speaker 1:That's a blessing to have.
Speaker 2:It is and I'm so thankful, I'm so thankful and I'm so happy for all those people.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love that. Give me three words that people would describe you as.
Speaker 2:People would describe me as friendly, knowledgeable and I would also say, good spirited.
Speaker 1:All right, Stevie, we really appreciate you coming on. Can you tell us where we can find you?
Speaker 2:Yes, you can find me with Mental Health Matters LLC and you can also find me with the Pinkerton Agenda Consulting Group. That is, small and large scale projects.