Healing The Mother Wound + Self Love Above All w/ Sana Akhand

Hello everyone, in this week's episode, I had the privilege of hosting the wonderful Sana Akhand as our special guest. Sana is dedicated to assisting women in unlocking their full potential through various methods such as self-discovery, somatics, shadow work, and integration. Both of us have experienced significant pain and trauma related to our mother wounds, and we felt compelled to create an episode aimed at permitting you to embark on your healing journey and eliminating any shame associated with your relationships with important women in your life. We candidly share our personal stories and the steps we took to overcome the pain and trauma of our egos, as well as to heal our inner child, ultimately contributing to the healing of our mother wounds. Tune in to this week's episode and join us on this transformative journey.

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Transcript

0:05

So everybody talks about like the narcissistic men and I'm like, you guys have no idea what it's like to have a narcissistic mother. Yeah. It's just next level. For years, I struggled with toxic relationships and understanding my own emotions. I found myself repeating the same cycles with different people and living in victimhood. I am Maria, your host, and I specialize in self mastery coaching. I've spent the last few years working with various therapists in order to heal my own traumas and help others. This podcast is your dedicated resource for gaining emotional intelligence, nurturing self awareness, and cultivating healthy relationships. If you're prepared to master your emotions, improve your relationships, and create captivating self confidence. Then this podcast is for you. Thank you for listening and welcome to this week's episode. Sana. Thank you so much for being on this week's episode. You've been on here before and we've talked about amazing things. And today, as we chatted right before we got on here, we started recording. We talked about our mother wound and we're like, you know what? Let's just talk about that on this episode because so many women struggle with this. And we have similar stories with our own mother wound, but also a lot different. And. We both want to share what that's been like for us and how that's translated into our relationship with our partners and in friendships and with other women and welcome. That's a long intro, but welcome. Yeah. Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to dive into this topic. Cause I feel like it's just like recently, I feel like I'm. Ready to talk about it, you know, yeah, it's, it's full, right. It's it's your mother and it was so painful for me for so long. And there's almost a lot of judgment. Every time I told somebody I didn't speak to my mom, they're like, why? You know, what's wrong with you? It was almost like, you only have one mother and it's the worst. And I don't know, do you want to start and talk about your relationship with your mom and kind of how you guys navigated waters? Yeah, sure. So, The biggest thing that I think, that I get really upset about when I do tell people about, you know, going no contact with my mom, is like, they always say, they always make it seem like it's your fault, and in reality, nobody ever thinks like how hard it must be for a child to go no, to choose to not talk to their mom, and they never think like, what could the mom have possibly done? For someone to make that decision, so I just kind of want to share a little bit of my background and I'm going to get really vulnerable and open and honest here because yes, I just want you guys to see it all. So you can have a window into my reality. So my mom and I have always had a very. Treacherous like relationship growing up. She was extremely abusive, emotionally unstable. She worked a lot, so when she would come home, she would just like, beat us over dishes in the sink. Like, it was just like, super abusive. Toxic unhealthy at home because of her energy and then I, um, you know, when I went to college, I was like, I'm free. I'm done. I'm like, not in that anymore. And I like, it was actually a pretty good time in our life, but then I found out, you know, shortly after COVID that my mom was having a nine year affair with a guy that was my age. So, that was the reason she eased up, I guess, because it happened right when our relationship ended up getting better. So putting the, connecting those dots was really troubling for me, right? He was like my agent and he was someone who like hit on me. So it was just like a very weird, like eye opening, shocking moment for me of like, wow, my mom is human. Like she's not this like idolized perfect person that I need to keep on a pedestal. It was like my permission to take her off that pedestal. And that really is what jumpstarted my entire healing journey. And, you know, as much as I hated that that happened, I'm looking back at it, it's like the most. The most grateful thing ever that I have because if that never happened, I never would have started journaling. I never would have had the experience that I've had in my life. So you found out nine years ago? No, so I found out like this, I found out in 2020, like the right before COVID. Gotcha. Wow. And did you ever confront her? Do you guys have a conversation about it? Oh my god. Yeah, so my sister is the one who actually found out and then she told us and then nobody wanted to talk to my mom about it And like everybody was like sugarcoating it I actually like took my dad out to lunch and I was like dad like this is real this is happening You need to do something about this and he was like well She probably already is like living in guilt and regret and whatever and I was like no Because I was a horrible daughter where I would be such a rebel and I would like I used to like Cheat on my ex boyfriends or whatever and I was like no dad coming from someone who is capable of such a thing We don't hold regret. We don't have resentment. We don't have these feelings. They're like, it doesn't happen. It doesn't happen. And then, um, we got home and my dad and my sister and my mom were in the bedroom and I was out in the living room. My dad's like, Sana, can you come? And I was like, okay. And then my dad's like, Sana has something to say to you. Putting me on the fricking spot? Like, what the hell? But that was the first time in my entire life where I spoke up to my mom and I was like, What you did is horrible. What you did is wrong. You need to apologize. You can't just like, brush this under the rug. Like, you brush everything under the rug. You can't passive aggressive your way out of this. It's time to talk about it and like, face it. And I'm telling you, energetically, I felt so powerful and strong and just like finally like the phoenix rising from the ashes of like speaking up and like calling her out on the bullshit. It's kind of crazy. It's like all the abuse she had with you, it was probably all her own happiness, but you were like the, the end of it, right? Like you were the other side of it. She like let it out on you. And then so that was like a moment for you to stand up to her and be like, no, you don't get to do this anymore. You can't hurt people and pretend that it's okay. Like own up to your, to your crap. Yeah. And it felt like a true, like moving from the wounded child into like an equal woman. Like, you know, there is a transition that happens as women get older, where like, in order to heal your inner child, you have to realize that you are the parent of your inner child. And that means that your parents are no longer your parents. You take them into the role that they are, where they were your caregivers growing up, but you don't have to get their approval for the rest of your life. Like they're allowed to just be your caregivers. And then you can step into The woman that you came here to be. Yeah. And I love that. I'm glad that you had that moment and I, I hate that it happened that way, but it's also great that it happened that way and that you got to see her as just a human that makes mistakes. And that's kind of what happened with me. And I won't, I won't go backwards because there was a moment where I was like, Oh, my mom. My mom's a hurt little child too. Like I forgot that she, she was never loved. Right. And a lot of my mom, my mom's journey is that she never, she never met her mom. So her mom was really poor. And so she gave her away to this lady that had money. And so she was raised by this. Lady that had money and that was, she always called her like her aunt. Um, and so she never had like an actual mother that loved her and cared for her. And so that translated into her relationship with my sisters and then with me and my sisters left her and they all had kids really young and I was left by myself. With my mom and she was really controlling, manipulative, lied a lot. And I would always call her out. I was like, I remember being a little kid and be like, that's not true. Like, why are you saying lies mom? Like, and then I would get in trouble. And so it was something that I always hated. I like, I don't, I'm not even a good liar now because I've always hated people that lied. And so growing up, I was very like. Sheltered, like manipulated, controlled, and I set myself free around 18 or 19. My dad died. So there's always like a pivotal moment. Like you were saying, there's always like a moment in time where you're like, wow, like enough is enough. My dad died. And she was always very emotionally unstable and emotionally abusive and verbally abusive and like the things she would tell me and he died. And I remember her saying to, cause I wasn't close to him, I remember her saying to me, why are you crying over your dad that was never there for you and he didn't care about you? And I was like, I think as an adult already, I was 18 years old. I was like, I cannot believe that somebody saying this to their grieving daughter, regardless of who my dad the awareness of that, which is amazing. Yeah. And regardless of what my dad did, like, it's not normal to say that to somebody, right? Like I'm emotional. I'm crying. I'm like hurt. I'm in pain. And so that was my, like aha moment of being like, wow, there's something really wrong here. Like there's something that's not clicking in her brain. There's something that's. She's, she's not healthy for me. And then fast forward a year later, I decided to move out on my own at 19 and I left, um, but I still stay in touch, send her money. And I felt really bad, just like abandoning her and leaving her. And then there was like a lot more drama that came after that and with my sisters and money, and she kind of just used my sisters and I, and my stepdad that helped. Raised me. So she kind of used everyone in different ways and we all kind of got together and found this out. And, and so there was a pivotal time where I was like, I just can't keep her around anymore. Cause it was all in or nothing. And so I haven't talked to her for the last like eight years, but it felt really heavy. I felt really ashamed of it. I felt guilty about it at the beginning. And then in the last like year or so after going to the retreat, especially last year, I felt this like weight lifted off my shoulders because I get to just see it for what it is, because there's no space where I get to. Have a relationship with my mom. That's even semi normal or healthy or loving or fulfilling. And I think I told you off camera, she'll take more than can give me at any point in our relationship. And there's just like, no, no point in me going there again. And I love that you have the awareness for that. And you're active, like you're consciously making that choice. Right. So you're like, it's not just like a emotional reaction where you're like, Oh fuck her. Like I don't like her. Like she ruined my life. I don't want to talk to her. You, it sounds like put everything on the table, really took the time to assess like what is right for me, whether it makes sense in society or whether other people get it or not. And that's so powerful. And that was like the hardest breakup, right? Like talk about breakups. Like everyone's like my divorce. Yeah. My divorce was hard, but it wasn't as hard as leaving my own mother and her being such a victim about it and making me feel like crap, like I abandoned her. At some point she was even homeless and like, talk about melodrama. She was like on despierta America, which is good morning America in Spanish. And she was on there saying how her daughters all abandoned her and she had been homeless all to get a makeover. That was like one of my last draws and why I stopped talking. So everybody talks about like the narcissistic men and I'm like, you guys have no idea what it's like to have a narcissistic mother. Yeah. It's just next level. And it comes from a lot of pain. And I'm sure growing up, you probably experienced that. And then I don't know, was your mom very judgmental? Cause mine was so judgmental. Like extremely like what you're wearing. Why aren't you doing this? Why aren't you doing like, why aren't you acting like this? Why? Like, if I like looked at something differently or weirdly, she would be like, fix your face. I'm like, Hey, and it's because they're so unhappy with themselves, but they are, they project outwards and it's painful. And I love that you said the appearance thing, because with my mom, it was like, she was always perfect on the exterior and no one believed me once I like left her, no one believed me that she had all these issues. They're like, great. And I'm like, So my mom, like, you know, she runs a restaurant. She's like, you know, badass, like super strong, independent woman, like running the show at the restaurants, like the restaurants, like really, really popular and I could never, like, tell people the truth, like, they would not believe me. Even my sister, like, my sister is a very My mom and my sister are, like, so similar. And, um, she's also, like, very narcissistic, very, like, abusive emotionally and verbally, and, you know, just, like, a person who, like, always plays the victim. Um, and I had to go into contact with her, too, because she also, like, It just is not safe. And I posted a video on TikTok about like, officially choosing to like, go no contact with my sister. And apparently, all her friends like, saw it and started commenting on it. And they were like, You shouldn't be dishing out this dirty laundry. You shouldn't be like, bad mouthing her. And I was just like, whoa. And they were like, oh, this isn't my experience with her. I think you're lying. I was like, first of all, like, Damn girl, you got some good ass friends. Like, congratulations. They all came to attack you. I know, and I had to, and I was just like, you know, like, I wish, I hope your listeners know that like, just because people aren't validating your experiences and your feelings and your emotions doesn't mean that it's not true for you. And like, that was a big lesson for me recently where it's like, just because these people don't see my point of view, it doesn't mean that I'm not allowed to share my point of view, right? And. That's empowering, right? Where you don't need other people to validate you and be like, well, that's, yeah, you're right. You're, you're in the right to feel that. Like, no, your feelings are valid, like you said, and it's okay to feel that way. And it actually made me feel more powerful, where it's like, I don't care about what people think. I'm sharing this for the people, for the one person that may need to hear it, or may need. You know, or just like a past version of me who like needed someone to say, it's okay to not have a relationship with your sister. Yeah. I mean, I don't speak to my sister either, because again, like the generational trauma is real and it just like spread everywhere. And I'm the last sole survivor and decided to break that cycle. But we are the chosen one. And if you're listening to this and you're struggling with it, you know, We don't, we want to make sure, you know, it doesn't have to be extreme. We don't have to stop talking to your family members, but you do have to do what feels right to you. And you have to set boundaries when you're feeling that your energy is being more drained than it is being filled. Right. So like that's the most important thing for women, especially because like we need our energy to do the sacred work that we came here to do, whether you're, You know, starting a business or community or creative project or whatever, like your life force needs to be the number one thing you protect in this life. And you do that by setting those boundaries when necessary and you'll feel guilty the first couple times you do it, but it's a practice. Like it's a sacred practice to protect your energy. Because there's only so much of it. This is what I try to teach my clients. It's like, there's only so much energy you can, you know, give outwards. And if your energy is leaky, especially with family, because Depending on how you grew up, like there's not a lot of boundaries usually in family dynamics. And so mom colored families, like Hispanic families, everyone's crazy. Everyone's super into everyone's problems and issues. Everyone talks about each other behind each other's backs. And they call it love. I know instead of just going and telling the person how they feel, and it's important that, you know, especially with family, especially with your sister, with moms, where Where your boundaries are, where your limits are like, Hey, I can give, I cannot give no, sorry. That doesn't feel aligned and being okay with disappointing people and making them angry. We talked about how you felt like you were disappointing your parents at some point. I know I did as well with, when I left my mom, I disappointed her. My sister was a mom since she was 18. She never had. Like a fun life or she was married to one person, got divorced, kind of got stuck there emotionally and energetically. And I have traveled the world, lived in seven cities, drank and partied in my twenties, didn't have any kids, got a divorce. Now I'm in a beautiful relationship. So I've done things completely opposite. So I've been judged by her so much. And I don't know about you, but like my sister has exact situation in my. Really? Because my sister got married at 21 and she had kids because my dad's health was bad so she like felt obligated to have kids and uh, she always resented the fact that I choose to be child free, I travel the world, I do whatever I want, I have a man who like makes a lot of money and her husband doesn't, so like, it's so much jealousy. But these are all sad, right? I know! Like, you could have made your choice too! I know, I always like, I, it, it baffles me how people make choices and then they are upset when other people make different choices. But even like, so the mother wound was a big choice in Mina having. My own children. And for a while I didn't want to have kids on my own because of my mother wound, and I had to heal that and make that decision based on not my mother. Right? Like heal that enough to know, okay, I, I don't want children because of the time commitment, what it means for my life changes. And because I love my passion, I love my career and that's my baby. And I don't know, did you have the similar experience with not wanting kids? Oh my gosh, for the longest time, I mean, forget, like, the kids, yes, exactly the same exact situation. And my career, too, where it was like, do I want fame and recognition to be like, haha, parents, I didn't need you, I made it all on my own, like, look at me on these, the cover of a magazine, you know what I mean? Like, it was like my driving force for a really long time. For my ambition. And when I healed my mother wound, I completely lost my ambition. I had nothing to like prove to anyone or anything. And I really went into my soft feminine era and just like indulged in being taken care of by my man for a little while. I love that. And let's talk the other way. You're doing it for the wrong reasons. Totally. And, you know, I think that when you have that switch from being motivated by external factors versus intrinsically or whatever, like it's such a big shift from like having to cultivate that on that. Drive and that ambition internally is so hard. Yes, because there's no exterior forces, except for, I know where I came to on this planet to be more than what I, I have been so far, right? Like, you know, we're here for a reason and you want to do more, but yeah, I agree with you. I, I would say that my hyper independence was because of my mother wound. And, you know, I had to take care, I had to mother my own mother growing up. Like I was the adult, I was the emotionally mature one. And so. I became really hyper independent and same thing I had in my past marriage. I wanted to start businesses so that I could retire him. I was like so much of my masculine just so that I can mother him. You know, I wanted a mother, everyone, my friends, my anyone that I could, so it felt normal. You know, doesn't that sound so lovely at first you're like, you actually are, I used to brag about it. I'll be like, Oh my gosh, I'm so giving. I'm so nurturing. I'm so, I put everyone before me. And then you realize like, wait a minute, that's not. A thing to brag about. That just means you have lack of boundaries, you don't have self care, you abandon your own needs, you neglect your inner child. It's not a cute look. No, I used to love being needed. I'm like, Oh, all my friends are calling me with their problems. This is awesome. Like I must be like really good at what I do. Yeah. And a part of us is that, right? Like our soul is happy because our soul isn't thinking about it. Like, Oh, I need to get paid for this or like any of the egos, like human needs and desires, right? The soul just wants to be recognized. It wants to feel. Like it's being in service to the greater good. So when we're helping people are, are so happy and happy, like, you know what I mean? Like, but then. Reality hits and you're like, wait a minute. I have a vessel. I have a body that also needs to be taken care of. I can't just satisfy my soul. Right. Right. And then it becomes like energy sucking where all my friends in the past, when I had, when my mother wound was really intense, they were all just there to take from me. Just kind of the same way my mom did, like everyone resembled and mirror that same relationship that I had with my mother. And it's crazy seeing it now because I didn't see it at the time. I just thought I was. Like I was friends with people that needed me. You know, it was just like a common theme too in my life. People just needed me. And at what point did you realize that you needed to switch? Hmm. That's a good question. I would say it was around the time that I was getting a divorce. I started reevaluating all of my relationships. I was like, well, this can't be the only one that I'm Not doing well in, that's smart. But you did a full inventory check. I'm like, okay, what is everything? Like, it's not just my marriage. That's going to go up in flames. It's like, it's turning everything down basically. And I like lost a lot of friends and I pivoted and I transitioned. I just, some people just didn't feel aligned anymore. I was just like, this isn't, and it's always in those darkest times. Like I started thinking about this the other day. I was like, it's in the dark times where you feel like you can lose everything at once. You know, I've lost rock bottom, rock bottom, right? Whatever it was, I think I've had multiple, like everyone's like, there's this big rock bottom woman. I was like, I've had a few. Honestly, I have them every few months. Right. And that's because that's like the level of like expansion that we're experiencing collectively. Honestly, I think everybody has the opportunity to. Look within and do the shadow work and like nip all of the weeds out of our garden so that we can make space for the flowers to bloom. Yeah. You know, I think that a lot of people are scared to do that. And like, I obviously love your content and I love everything that you stand for and I love the messages that you have and you have that level of power and maturity because It's a reflection of the inner work that you're willing to do. Totally. And what about you? I love your content. What are you doing? I know you work with a lot of women. Where do you see the mother wound coming up the most for women as like a constant pattern? In their relationships. Yeah. Like I think that we definitely mirror how Like if you're not, if you're not doing the shadow work, your shadows are controlling your behaviors and the way you act and react in life. And subconsciously we're always trying to think like, I don't want to be like my mom, but if you have a lot of shadows, that is exactly what you're projecting and manifesting out into your reality. And I catch myself sometimes where I'm like, mothering my husband or like nagging him and being like, can you like pick up your socks? Can you clean your bathroom? Can you do this? Can you do that? And it's like, Whoa, I don't want to be that person that is like bitter because of something my husband is doing or not doing. Like, you know, I should just be like, Hey babe, like let's have a cleaning day and like throw music on and like do it together. Instead of. Being bitter and scolding and this and that right there's a way to Be a muse like I love that you say that is like be your own muse But also be the muse in your relationship where it's like show them what you need Don't tell them what you need and like do it in a way where it's like sexy and fun and energetic Versus like dreaming and nagging and resentful and bitter. Yeah. I mean, if you scold a man, it's like you're scolding a little boy and they will retreat and think that they're doing a terrible job and it like pushes them away so easily. And it's going to push your own libido away. Totally. Yeah, you don't want to be with like yourself at that point. Like, you don't feel sexy being like an ogre running around screaming about the laundry, you know? It doesn't feel sexy, trust me. I've been there, I know. Literally, yeah. And then I catch myself and I'm like, wait, my mom is a perfectionist, obviously, right? She like needed this thing to always be clean, the dishes to always be clean. And I was like, what would happen if our house is a little messy? Who is coming over? Who cares? Like, maybe it's okay to live in a place that's not architectural digest ready all the time. It's so true, like, who starts this for us? Is our mothers, is our fathers, whoever was a perfectionist, whoever put those standards in our lives, and then we feel like we have to live up to them, because if not, that means something about us. Yeah, and I'm learning that I'd rather, like, take that energy instead of putting it onto him and, like, make more money so that I can hire a housekeeper. Every week. Every week. I love it. I don't want to have a live in. Oh my gosh. Yes. Come on. Gotta dream bigger. Yeah. You're so right. When we, we shift that energy, right? We move it. Like the feelings, emotions, everything is there. We just have to be. As women were the emotional gatekeepers, and I love that you, you basically where you're saying it's like we show men how to treat us, but we do that with our emotions. We can either be reactive, explosive and push them away, or we can show up for ourselves and show up for ourselves. And then they're like, Oh, wait, let me match this. Right. Men are givers. They're providers. They're doers. They will match whatever energy you bring easy. Oh my gosh, if there's only one thing that people or your listeners take from this conversation today, let it be the fact that I'm telling you guys, like once I stopped and pulled my energy back and put it into just being the person I want to be and like put pouring myself into like nourishing meals for myself and doing all the things that I want to do for my own body, it is an thing. Immediate energetic feeling that your man feels like, damn, she's taking care of herself. I want to take care of her too. Like it is so immediate. It's magic. Yeah. You have to give it to yourself first and then they will follow suit every single time. Also, like the more you take care of yourself energetically, you You're going to start to show up with more energy online and attract the right clients for you too. So your businesses are automatically going to do better. You're going to see all the magic and miracles in the world. So you're going to experience more magic. I always say like, pour into yourself and attract money, men, and magic. It's like, stop making money, men and magic. Your goal, your goal is you. And all of that is. The by product of taking care of yourself. And it's hard when we're living in that mother wound to think about ourselves because what, what, what our mothers teach us that they didn't give to themselves. My mom never gave to herself. She was always over giving and then throwing it in people's faces and making us feel guilty and shame for like not being the best daughters that we could be. And so that's what we're marrying. And so break that cycle. If you're catching yourself and you're listening to this, I've been Maybe your sisters are doing it. Your friends are doing it. You're doing it. Catch yourself and start breaking those cycles. Like Sana said, like start giving to yourself and it's easier said than done. We understand that, but it starts with a choice because neither of us would have been here. You said in 2020 you started, I think that's when, yeah, I got a divorce in 2020. So that's when I hit like my first rock bottom, like in my twenties. And it's been an evolution. I mean, we're what, 20 and 24, right? It's been four years and we're still like, I still think like, I'm just scratching the surface, you know? Yeah, and I wish like, a lot of people would know that too, where it's like, I thought when I, like, I say it's immediate in your relationship, and it is, but it's not immediate in your external reality outside of the home. Like, I think that definitely takes time to integrate and embody in order for the world's real effect that you'll see glimmers for sure, but it's not like, Oh, I cut my mom out. So where are my blessings universe? Like, where is my like six figure seven figure career universe or, you know what I mean? Like if you can't also do the hard work with the expectation of a reward, you really do have to be detached from the result and just do it because it makes you happier. It makes you feel safe. It makes your nervous system regulated. It just makes you feel. More alive. Yeah. It's like working out with a goal of like, I need to lose 10 pounds within two months. So restricting, you're going to be weighing yourself, you're going to feel super stressed out. Same thing when we put those energetic, like projections out, those, those energetic casts, like castings out. It's like, you have to release it. Just do the work, like work out, work, go on walks, eat better, try your best. Try your best. And then it will, the weight will fall off. But if you're like focused on like, Oh my gosh, I haven't lost a pound. I haven't lost half a pound this week or whatever. You're going to like, it's like you choke hold your dreams. You choke hold the goal, you choke hold what you really want. And that's just not the vibe. That's not how you create magic. And sometimes you think you want something, but the universe has so many So much more for you and you're missing it because you're so fixated on this little thing that you want. Yeah. Like I know that happened with me. Like the minute I let go is like, I just had this conversation with my husband the other day. I was like, damn, like it turned out better than I ever could have imagined. Yeah. I never could have imagined the life that I'm living right now. This is just like purely beyond my wildest dreams. Oh, same. Yeah. I was just in St. Lucia with my boyfriend and I felt the same way. It was so magical. Like I really felt like there were so many pinch me moments and I had, I've traveled the world. I've stayed a really nice places, but that wasn't the point. It was like the environment who I was with my feelings, how happy I am with myself. I've been to beautiful places, but I didn't feel beautiful on the inside. So it didn't match. I wasn't an energetic match. So it's beautiful places. I didn't see them with that light that I'm seeing things with now. And same thing with you. I'm sure it's like, now you see it with your own inner light. And so everything's just a reflection of who you are. Oh, that is so beautiful. I just love how you said that. Cause it's so true. Like everything that the more you do the inner work, it does reflect back to you in your external reality. Like, we could be completely in the most magical place in the world, but if we feel turmoil within, and you're not present in the moment, and you're not at peace with yourself and your soul and your life, no matter, you could have the perfect person, the perfect place, the perfect everything, and you will feel disconnected. A hundred percent. That's why so many people are rich and they're not happy. Right? True. Yeah. I love that. I love that. I think we should even just leave it at that because that is like the I agree. That was a really good, yeah. Yeah. I'm so happy you got on here with me and you talked about this mother wound, and thank you for being so vulnerable. I know it's hard and I hope this gives women permission to really release whoever it doesn't belong in their life, whether it's family or not. And start healing within or setting standards, setting those boundaries within themselves first and then everyone else will follow suit. And is there anything else you want to leave my listeners with before we go? Be the muse, not the mother and read through your actions of how you treat yourself is how you teach others on how you want to be treated. Yes. I love that. Thank you so much, Sana. It's always a pleasure. And I appreciate you so much for being on here. Of course.